To Become a Dwarf
by Akiluna
Summary: To become a dwarf you need several things…first of all, having one of them to vouch for you is compulsory. Then it's cooking lessons, cultural misunderstandings and lots of yelling, shouting and laughing. I had been lucky for once, since I met three of them…and they introduced me to their world./ starts pre-quest. slow romance. Nori/OC
1. Journey to the center of Middle Earth

**I don't own anything except for my OC and the plot...but everyone already knows that**

**Journey to the center of Middle Earth**

I really couldn't remember how all this had started. I could be home right now, listening to my friend's banter and happily doing whatever was to be done. Maybe I would be preparing some stew, cleaning a bit around the living room or simply writing notes in my book.

If I closed my eyes tightly enough, I could almost imagine the warmth of the hearth, the smell of the stew, and sounds of cheeky voices; I could hear them bantering, complaining, joking.

Yes, it was what I thought of when my mind drifted to think of home. Home meant warmth. Home meant laughs and loud discussions. Home meant them being around.

Funny how I had so quickly forgotten the rest. The far past, or so I called it.

Home will always be there now, in the heart of the mountain and never would I be able to think of my birth place as something else than a dreamlike experience.

Yet it didn't explain how I ended up in this situation.

My head was hurting and I could feel the blood dripping and coating my long brownish hair. My lungs were burning and I gasped to try and breathe some more but my chest was painfully crushed under the beast's fingers.

I felt its grip on me tighten and I couldn't help but let out the little air I had in my lungs in a painful whimper.

The creature lifted me higher and closer to its face and took a whiff at my hair while I had to concentrate hard to avoid puking. Being hung upside down, near such a stinking creature apparently had a churning effect on my stomach.

My situation couldn't be worse. I was going to die, alone in the wilderness and no one could or would come and help me.

The creatures were talking together but I didn't pay attention. I could feel the blood rushing to my head and was steadily growing dizzier and fainter.

I could see black dots clouding my vision. I don't really know why, but I thought about my friends. They would never know what happened to me, where I went and disappeared. I knew they were going to be sad and most likely feel slightly guilty too.

Guilt rushed through me. It felt as if everything that had been done, everything that had happened, meant nothing. I was going to die in the most stupid way possible, and it was my fault.

Yeah. I really outdid myself this time and I messed up once again.

I guess I'll never have the chance to apologize for being stupid enough to run in the wilderness by myself.

Their faces appeared in front of my closed eyes and I addressed each of them a silent apology, praying for them, hoping they would at least be safe.

My ears seemed to stop working and the only sound that registered in my brain was a rushing noise. My eyes were unseeing. The burn in my chest was all consuming. The pounding in my head was stronger than ever.

And then nothing.

*** two years ago***

I really should have listened to my instinct. Really who would be stupid enough to follow someone in a dark, humid and scary cave for fun? Me I guess.

I admit I had been curious to go in and see the famous stalagmites and stalactites that formed together a renowned natural architecture. The plan had been to come in, follow the guide and the path, enjoy the view and go back out with nice memories.

Now my luck or stupidity had decided for me to be slightly behind the group when a strange whizzing noise occurred and all artificial lights suddenly shut down. For a second there was an airy silence and I caught my breath, both surprised and if I were honest a bit scared.

I was starting to feel really uneasy when I heard the guide's voice, instructing to the group to stay close together and wait patiently.

Why, oh why hadn't I just stood there?

Why did I think I'd be able to join with the group in the pitch black cave?

I really was stupid, wasn't I?

Wandering aimlessly in the direction where I thought the voices were coming from, I ended up walking slowly, hands in front of me to try to find a wall or a cord or anything really that'll indicate where in the natural room I was.

I don't know how long it took me to realize that each time I heard the guide's or the others' voices, they seemed to be further away from me. I kept on walking though, not even thinking about how strange it was for me to not even be able to touch anything.

What were the odds really? I was walking blindly in the dark and still hadn't hit a wall, that didn't sound logical, especially not for me and my blasted nonexistent luck.

At the moment where I started to ponder about those issues, I saw from the corner of my eyes a light flickering on my right.

I didn't even bother to think this through I just went directly towards it, walking with renewed energy and purpose.

The funny part is that the further I seemed to walk, the further the light seemed to be. Well I say funny, but in reality that was damn annoying and creepy.

I was starting to doubt my sanity when that useless speckle of light went out completely.

Now I recall clearly that the noise I made was not a whimper, nor a shriek. Nope. It was an awkward mix of both.

I stilled completely and stood in the suddenly oppressing silence. I couldn't hear the voices of the group anymore, hadn't heard them in awhile actually. I had no idea what to do. Should I stay there and wait for the guide to find me? How far had I ventured in my attempt to find the group?

I took a tentative step forward. I didn't know it, but apparently I was afraid of closed, silent, dark places. Now was not a good time to discover I had some claustrophobic issues.

I swallowed the lump that was forming in my throat and blinked several times to keep the tears at bay. I am not ashamed to admit that I was quite afraid at that moment.

My eyes were wide open but it made no difference whatsoever as there wasn't even the tiniest bit of daylight. I took a deep shaky breath and started to wonder in which direction I should go, for I couldn't bring myself to wait here. Trembling I decided to go forward in the general direction where I'd seen a light, intensely hoping it hadn't been my brain playing a trick on me.

I felt my chest tightened and my heart started to beat wildly. I was not scared. I was terrified.

After a few steps my head painfully got acquainted with the wall and I fall to the ground with a yelp. Bringing my hands to my left temple I felt a wet and sticky substance under my fingers. Great, a head wound, just what I needed.

The pain did manage to take my mind from the fear I had been feeling but my respite didn't last long. I felt cold, colder than I ever had felt before. I clenched my fist tightly and bit my lower lip. I had to control this anxiety or I'll be stuck in this bloody cave forever. It took me quite a while and many deep calming breaths before I felt slightly better.

Gingerly I tried to find back my handbag that had fallen from my hands. After several long minutes of me crawling around, not finding anything but rocks under my fingers, I gave up. I'd manage to find my way back to the hotel without my phone, car keys and credit cards I guess.

Damn my luck. Damn. Damn. Damn.

I put my hands on the wall and slowly rose to my feet again. With one hand on the rock and the other extended in front of me, I started to walk again. I felt dizzy and my head hurt, but sitting wouldn't help me now so I had no other choice but to keep on going.

After awhile, and several more bumps in various walls, stalactites and stalagmites, I finally saw a light in front of me. It was nothing but a small, clearer point in my sight, but my hopes were high again and I walked with more energy though carefully.

This time, the light didn't move away and the more I walked, the closer I was to it and the clearer my surroundings became.

I could finally avoid the natural traps and further injuries. It did take me quite some time, but I ended up in a large cave and I could see a small hole in the distance whence the light came. As I stepped in the cavern and away from the dark tunnels, I felt a soft breeze on my face.

Immediately I smiled and didn't lose time. I made my way as quickly as possible toward the hole that provided light. It was on top of a rocky and clearly unstable slope so I ended up half climbing half crawling on the sharp rocks that scratched my palms and were digging painfully in my knees.

When I finally reached it, I realized the hole was barely wide enough for me to go through. As I was forcing my way out, the stone dug in my back and I had to muffle a cry. This clearly was not my day and I was going to give that creepy guide an earful. This cave was clearly not safe and the path of the visit was not properly signaled.

My grumpy thoughts were brutally stopped when I tumbled out, falling on the side of a slope and rolling all the way down without being able to stop my fall.

I lay on my back, unmoving, breathing heavily. I wanted nothing more than to take a hot bath and then curl under my covers on my bed while watching whatever movie would catch my interest. Yet I couldn't find the strength to move away from my landing spot.

I didn't know how long I had walked in this bloody cave but I was exhausted and my whole body was hurting both from the wandering and the fall. My head was pounding, miserably reminding me that I had hit it against a wall.

I felt my eyes close and didn't fight it, though it probably wasn't such a good idea to fall asleep after a head injury.

I didn't wake in a jolt. Nope. I woke slowly. Though I didn't, or rather couldn't, open my eyes yet I could hear voices around me.

Thank whatever deity or deities out there, some good Samaritans had found me. If I had had the strength I would have cry from relief.

I tried to force my brain to focus on what they were saying, though it took me some time.

"Poor lass." A first voice said.

"What happened to her?" This second voice sounded much younger.

"Well, we better make sure she's safe for now." That was the first voice once again.

It seems that I drifted of once again after hearing them, because the next time I started to wake, I could feel the ground below me was softer than before. There was something heavy and warm on my chest and I could hear the voices not too far away.

I tried to force my eyes open and blinked several times. My vision was blurry at first and when I stupidly tried to sit up, I moaned loudly from the pain and let myself fall back. My head had just hit the ground when I heard ushered footsteps coming closer. My eyes that had closed back on their own volition were forced once again to open.

I blinked some more until I could focus on the blurry shape next to me. As soon as the shape took a human form I forced a small smile on my lips.

"Hello"

Wow, my voice was so hoarse I sounded like a frog. I cringed and tried to clear my throat, only eliciting a coughing fit that had my whole body tremble and all my nerves sending pain signals to my brain.

"Easy there missy, drink this."

The old man seemed nice enough and I smiled weakly at him when he helped me into a sitting position. I could feel his large hand supporting my back while he brought a cup to my lips.

The feel of water against my lips suddenly brought to my attention how thirsty I truly was. I was so thankful for the clear, cold water that I could have cried. I felt as if I was turning into a crybaby and didn't like it in the least. I drank the whole cup quickly enough and the old man helped me lay back with gentle and careful move.

"Thank you.

-T'is nothing miss, now, are you feeling particularly faint or hurt?

-My head, I remember hitting my head. I think…

-Aye. I took care of that already. Were you hurt elsewhere?"

His soft tone and gentle eyes almost immediately made me trust him. I was really a trusting fool and this was no exception. But this man, this kind old man, had helped me; he gave me water and took care of me so far. I didn't see any reason not to trust him. Well at least as far as trusting a total stranger goes.

I slowly shook my head to answer his question with a simple "Just a few bruises, nothing much." And he simply nodded, muttering a "good" before smiling at me.

"So, do you feel strong enough to join us around the fire and have a bite of some warm stew?"

Fire? Wasn't he a tad too old for camping? Still I couldn't say no to the idea of warm food in my stomach so I nodded. I was perhaps too eager as I winced from a sudden pain in my head.

"There, there. Don't move too fast. I'll help you."

When had standing become such a painful process? I bit on my own lip and limply made my way to a fallen log where the old man helped me sit.

When he helped me walk, I realized he was quite short for a man, actually we were approximately the same size and I wasn't known for being tall, quite the opposite actually. Apparently I had gained my nickname of pixie from my mother's side of the family; from what my short aunt had told me, all the women in my mother's family had been short. Like really short.

I looked up and saw two other men, or rather a man and a younger one. The second one couldn't possibly be older than me. They were both staring at me so I averted my eyes, choosing to look at the fire instead of observing them. I didn't really like to be the center of attention. I shifted slightly, trying and failing to be comfortable on the log.

When the old man gave me a bowl with a spoon and hot stew I smiled largely at him.

"Thank you Mister…hem, sorry I forgot to ask your name.

-Oh, no worries Miss. I'm Dori, at your service. And these are my two younger brothers."

He made a gesture towards the two others and I forced myself to look at them. I think my eyes widened at the sight. I hadn't paid attention at first but these men were probably the strangest persons I ever encountered, what with the hair and beards and weird clothes?

"I'm Nori, at your service."

The older one said the corners of his mouth quirking slightly upwards. He had probably the oddest hairdo I had ever seen; his hairs were shaped in a design that reminded me immediately of a starfish, though there were only three branches in his star-shaped hair.

I looked at the youngest one when he spoke.

"I'm Ori, at your service."

Were those actual names? It sounded more like nicknames to me. How odd. Usually when people greeted each other they used their real names. The three of them looked at me intently and I felt a blush crept up my cheeks.

"I'm Amelia, pleased to meet you." I chose not to give my whole name, considering what they had given me.

They seemed a bit put out by my greetings but didn't say anything. I started to eat the stew which was rather tasty and stole glances in their directions.

I didn't know whether to be scared or amazed at their sight. The older man, Dori, had grey hair and a beard and mustache that were braided quite prettily I must say. His beard even adorned an impressively long metallic bead. He was talking with his youngest brother so my gaze shifted to the second one, Nori.

I was utterly shocked to see such a masterfully braided beard. The whole beard and mustache were braided in multiple tresses that were then held together in three distinct parts with large metallic beads. That must have taken quite some time to do. I did wonder what the matter was with this man and the number three, for it seemed like a significant number in his hairdo.

When my gaze shifted slightly upward from his beautiful beard, I met his eyes and felt myself blush again at being caught blatantly staring at him. I thought he would glare at my rudeness but he simply smirked and winked at me cheekily before focusing on his own stew.

"Lady Amelia, if I may ask, why is it you were alone in these lands?"

I frowned slightly at the whole "lady" part but still managed to answer.

"Well, I was visiting the caves nearby when I lost the group and the guide. I don't know how long I've been stuck in there, but let me tell you I was damn glad to see daylight again." Looking at the sky I realized it must have been a long time, for the night was quickly falling now.

They reacted strangely at my words. Frowning and clearly puzzled by something I had said. Maybe they didn't understand why I decided to visit a cave, after all none of my so called friends had wanted to come with me. An unwelcomed feeling of shame started to blossom in my chest and I had the urge to explain myself, which was utterly preposterous.

"You see, I just got the results for my finals and I failed. I wanted to change my mind and I thought that the visit of this cave would cheer me up. It did actually at first. It's truly an amazing sight, the columns and stuff…"

I stopped talking entirely as I saw that they seemed even more lost than before after my little explanation. Now that I was actually able to think relatively properly, I wondered at how it could be possible for me to meet three weird looking men who spoke perfect English, albeit strongly accented, in the middle of French countryside.

One of them asked me a question though, thus stopping that trail of thought.

"I'm sorry milady, but what cave?

-It must be close by, though I forgot its name and lost the prospectus in the dark. Actually, I lost everything in the dark…" I sighed silently cursing myself, how lucky could I be to lose my handbag and all my belongings in a dark dingy place?

I had absolutely no chances to ever see them again.

Glancing up I saw the three men exchange glances as they clearly seemed surprised by my answer. I started to frown. Something was wrong. Well, something aside me getting lost and ending up with such a crowd.

From their appearance to the fact that they were camping in the middle of nowhere, something just wasn't right. It started to worry me slightly to say the least.

My gaze shifted from the cauldron, yes cauldron, on top of the fire to the metallic bowl in my hand that was beautifully crafted. Then I glanced at the men, their beards and hair, their strange looking clothes, their weird apparently leather boots.

As I was observing intently my companions for the first time, I finally ended up looking at a strange looking wooden stick. Analyzing it I realized it was more of a sort of hammer than a walking stick, with the dangerous looking metallic end of it that even had some spikes.

My eyes widened slightly and wandered to a very lethal looking sword near Dori.

Ok, now there was a problem.

Who were these guys?

Starfish, or Nori if I wanted to be polite, apparently saw that something was suddenly wrong with me. Well, I guess me letting a perfectly good bowl of stew falling on the ground was sort of a dead giveaway.

I wasn't really proud of my reaction. My hands had started shaking violently as images of violent deaths started to play in my mind.

"Milady, are you alright?"

My gaze fixated on Dori and I felt my mouth drying and a large lump in my throat. I guess I was turning pretty pale too and I felt faint and light headed, but now was not a good moment to lose consciousness. I forced myself to swallow the lump and muttered in a sickeningly shaky voice.

"Who…who are you guys?

-I'm sorry, milady?

-What…why do you have those?"

I pointed at their weapons and idly wondered if I should try to stand and prepare to dash away. I was really starting to freak out. They had the indecency to look surprised by my question. As if wandering around with medieval lethal weapons in our days and age was a common occurrence.

Dori answered, he was the only one who was really speaking with me so far, the other two simply looking at the exchange. Though the youngest, Ori, looked at me with curiosity and wonder, while the other, Nori, seemed more serious in his appraisal.

"Do not fear us milady" Dori gently tried to calm me. "We only travel with those for our own protection."

Yeah, right. I bet many victims heard this speech before.

"Protection? Against what?"

I managed not to snort, but barely. These guys took me for an imbecile if they thought I was going to believe them. I just had to try and play for time, I needed to bolt away but right now I knew I couldn't.

When he answered though I realized I was in a bigger problem than I previously thought.

"Well, orcs, goblins or other creatures found in these parts, mostly wolves around here."

These men were mad.

They believed they were living in some kind of magical land with monstrous creatures. Just my luck to end up being rescued by such weirdoes.

Now, how should I play this? Bluntly telling them orcs and goblins didn't exist might generate reactions I didn't care to witness. Should I make them believe I was living in the same fantasy as them? It might be safer for now to act along.

"Right, how silly of me."

There was a short silence before I cleared my voice and asked them

"Do you think you could…hem" What was the word to use with medieval freaks? "Yes, hem, would you mind escorting me to the nearest city or town?

-Of course not milady, we wouldn't let you travel along these parts alone. It's far too dangerous; wolves especially have been sighted recently in these mountains.

-Right. Wolves. Hem where is the nearest town, I'm a bit lost.

-We are a few days away from the village of Beinne, milady."

That made me pause for a minute. I had never heard of such a village, but on the other hand I wasn't very familiar with the area. Maybe I had walked under that mountain longer than what I had previously thought.

"I'm not sure where we are exactly.

-We're north of Forlond milady."

This man was an expert with answering questions in a way that I had no choice but to ask him some more.

"I'm sorry, but where is that." I insisted.

"North of the Gulf of Lune, in the southern area of the Ered Luin."

Okay, I wanted to scream right now. This man was not making any sense, I had never heard of any of these places and there was no gulf in the close area and the names sounded foreign.

I could see that Nori was observing me with a deep frown, while Dori seemed to wonder why we apparently couldn't understand each other. The old man talked once more, breaking my musing.

"Milady, where do you hail from?"

He was starting to seriously annoy me with the 'milady' he uttered at each sentence and all the other silly vocabulary and notions he seemed to enjoy using. Seriously these creeps were living in their fantasies quite thoroughly. Well, anyway there was no harm in answering that question.

"I'm from UK. I came here for holidays. As I told you I wanted and needed a change in atmosphere."

Why did they look like I was talking in Chinese every time I spoke? It was starting to grate on my nerves, my tiredness not helping me being patient.

"We are … not familiar with such city. Is it in the southern parts of Eriador?

-Nope, it's Western part of Europe, the islands west from France and Belgium. And it's a country not a city."

Here it is again, that annoying look that says 'we really don't get a word you're saying'. Who didn't know Europe or UK for that matter? These men were camping in France and were unaware of its geography? I was seriously wondering whether they were actually sick and not just weird. Maybe they had escaped from a nearby mental hospital?

Oh, I did not want to think about the creepy possibilities such a thing entailed. Nope, I'd rather believe they were happy dudes living their dreams during their holidays.

"We never heard of such a country. But you said it's an island in the West? Are you by any chance an elf?"

I couldn't help it. Really I couldn't.

I laughed. I couldn't remember when was the last time I laughed so much that my stomach started to hurt like this. These men were both scary and awesome in their craziness. That was quite a feat. It took me quite some time to calm down my sudden laugh and I brushed away some tears that had spilt on my cheeks. Catching my breath I looked at them, checking the expressions on their faces.

"Wait, you're serious?"

"No, I'm sorry milady, I spoke without thinking."

I sighed, relieved, that he admitted he had been joking. Though his next words made me freeze and realize these guys had serious troubles.

"You couldn't be an elf, you're clearly too short and don't look like one at all."

I think that it was the young one's serious nod that told me to listen to my instincts this time. I felt a growing sense of dread pooling in me and I frowned deeply and looked the old, Dori, in the eyes.

"Are you actually serious?"

He seemed both surprised and a bit offended by my question, so I spoke some more, trying to explain myself.

"I mean, you're not joking right? You really believe…I mean you really thought…"

I stopped there actually unsure of what to say or how to say it.

"Milady, you should probably lie down, I think the hit on your head was maybe harder than we previously believed."

Now I was offended.

I huffed but had to agree with him with one point; the hit had been hard and I still felt slightly dizzy. And the truth was that I was indeed tired and that awkward discussion had not helped in that matter at all, quite the opposite actually. I nodded to him and he came to help me stand once more.

My muscles were horribly sore and standing up made my head spin a little. I grabbed him for support that he nicely provided. He guided me toward the woolen blanket where I had previously been and gently patted my shoulder once I was lying down.

"Don't worry milady, you're perfectly safe with us."

I smiled at him, not entirely believing his words but not wanting to show it to them. They had been nice so far and hadn't hurt me in anyway. I should at least be thankful for that.

To my utter surprise it didn't take me long to swiftly drift asleep that night.

**A/N: So...this is my first ever story in English and for the Hobbit. It's going to be rather long and very slow in pace (for the romance part). I'm trying something different, for I'm not used to write using the first person. I decided to write this more as a challenge and because I wanted to see an OC who doesn't fall for Durin's line for once. (Mind you, I do love those stories).**

**The quest will happen. But not until awhile. **


	2. Of Dwarves, Dresses and Contracts

**I don't own anything except for my OC and the plot. **

* * *

When I opened my eyes the following morning it took me a moment to gather my thoughts and remember the previous day's events. I groaned while getting in a sitting position. My head didn't hurt so much and the various scrapes and scratches I had on my hands and cheeks were easily forgotten, but my muscles protested loudly when I slowly stood.

I really wasn't used to any kind of physical effort. I was a bookworm at heart and I had spent the previous months with my heads in medical books, preparing for my final exams. Well my failure at said exams had made it all meaningless anyway.

I sighed. I had decided to take holidays alone in France in order to put it all past me. My aunt and uncle, who had raised me after my parents' death, had been so disappointed in those results it had hurt to see it. I couldn't blame them though. They had paid for all my expenses and the university fees, they had done everything they could to help me, proudly stating to everyone they knew that I would one day be a brilliant surgeon.

Coming back home with the bad news had been one of the worst day of my life, truly. I could easily remember my aunt's face; sad and disappointed. My uncle had just stood up from the couch and left to go in the garden, his silence spoke volume to me. It had hurt me to see them hurt; all because I couldn't do it, because I wasn't good enough.

Well there was no point in dwelling on it and I had been given the possibility to retake the courses anyway so I'll have a second chance. The prospect of retaking all the courses and exams depressed me greatly. I had somehow, at some point in time, lost the will to follow this path and it disturbed me greatly.

It was Ori who stopped all those depressing thoughts, coming to me and asking in a sweet voice.

"Milady, do you wish to join us for breakfast?"

I smiled at him and nodded. I was starving actually and was pleasantly surprised to see the sausages and bacon that were being prepared by Dori.

Nori eyed me suspiciously but I tried to ignore it. I was almost sounding cheerful when I spoke next.

"Hello Dori, Nori. Thanks for yesterday.

-Did you sleep well milady?" Dori asked.

"I slept like a log." I nodded, still smiling.

"Are you hungry? As you can see, breakfast will soon be ready.

-I'm starving.

-Good, good." He laughed before Ori asked me if I wanted some bread.

"Oh yes please. And I'd love some sausages too. I love sausages."

I smiled some more, trying to be both polite and showing my gratitude. But then I realized that Nori's suspicious glance had changed to a true glare. It shocked me, really, because I didn't understand what I could have said.

"I'm sorry…I didn't mean to ask for more. Bread would be great."

Dori sent me a surprised look, apparently not understanding why I had just changed my mind. Then I saw him glance toward his brother and he huffed, obviously exasperated.

"Oh Nori, for Mahal's sake!" He grumpily said before turning towards me. "Don't worry milady, there's enough sausages for all the four of us, even though my brother here is especially fond of them. I apologize for his rudeness."

I dumbly nodded before glancing at Nori who didn't seem regretful at all. Dori sighed before muttering to his brother.

"Mother would be ashamed. And think about the example you set for Ori."

I was amazed to see that those two comments made Nori's cheeks slightly blush and he started to look sheepish. He glanced at me and shifted uneasily.

"I apologize for my rudeness milady." He muttered.

I couldn't help but smile back at him. I don't know if it was the star-shaped hairdo, the braided beard or his mischievous grey eyes that met my green ones shamelessly, but there was something about him that made me smile.

We all ate silently. I smirked when I saw that Nori used his brother's inattention to steal one sausage directly from his plate and ate it quickly. Seeing that I had caught him red handed, the man shrugged and winked at me. I shook my head, smiling to myself.

When Dori realized the theft, he glared at his brother who was the perfect picture of innocence and it made me laugh softly. Nori's wink in my direction only made me smile more.

Shortly after the men gathered all their supply and broke the camp quite efficiently. Then I could see them putting on leather coats and shouldering leather bags. Well I guess it was consistent with their fantasies at least.

Then we silently started to walk.

The silence was quickly broken though when the youngest, Ori, came to me and shyly asked.

"Milady, you said you came from another country?

-Hem, yes. UK." Seeing his puzzled look I elaborated. "You know, the United Kingdom, England, the Queen, London, tea, Big Ben…"

Wow, he actually looked like he never heard of it before. Then, to my utter surprise, he took out a small notebook and a piece of what I guessed to be charcoal, and started to write in it.

"You have a queen as a ruler? How fascinating. And your clothes are they the normal garb or do they represent a particular cast or clan?

-Hem, I'm sorry, what?

-Your clothes. Is it usual for women to wear such garments where you come from?"

I looked at my tattered jeans, shirt and hoodie and then back at him. He was waiting for my answer, his hand hovering over his notebook, and ready to write whatever I'll tell him. I noticed too that his cheeks were a bit pink.

"They're quite common actually.

-Fascinating"

I was hesitating between surprise and fondness. This young man was really sweet and so eager to know things about me. But his questions were strange at best. I frowned and then took the time he wrote to ask a question that had been nagging me for awhile.

"What is it you're doing here?"

Dori and Nori, who were walking a few steps further, turned to glance at me and Dori answered.

"We're going to Beinne to renew some contracts, milady.

-Contracts?"

These men actually worked? I couldn't believe it.

"Aye. We've had some trade agreements there for decades now but the merchant we used to trade with died. We now have to renew the contracts with his son."

His explanation did nothing to silence my disbelief.

"I'm sorry your…partner died." I said hesitatingly.

"Well it is sadly usual for us to see our trading partners die."

That comment made me stop. I actually froze on the spot. Who would say something like that? And with such a tone... He actually sounded like it was the most natural thing for their partners to die when working with them. Who were these guys?

"Milady?"

Ori looked at me curiously, clearly not understanding what was happening in my mind.

Well I couldn't be surprised by that, my mind was a mess. Were these men part of some sort of sect? Mafia? They seemed so nice, was that an act?

"Milady, are you alright?" Dori asked and I as I looked at him, I saw his eyes widened when he recognized the sudden fear in mine.

"Milady?

-Are you…are you going to kill me?"

I agree that was probably the worst and stupidest question I could have asked. But at the moment it seemed perfectly coherent in my mind.

They seemed shocked, bewildered even, that I dared asked them this.

"What, why? I mean, why would you ask such a thing milady?

-Well…you said you're used to people you know dying so…

-Men, milady, we're used to men dying earlier than us."

I think my eyes were as wide as saucers. Did he actually believe this answer would quiet down my anxiety? He said it with such finality too, as if his words were evident, as if this would explain everything. It didn't even start to answer my question.

"Right, so you don't kill women?"

I admit it, using irony wasn't probably my best idea but apparently I was in a pretty stupid mood right now. Dori white brows almost disappeared in his hairline.

"I meant men kind milady."

Men kind? What was that suppose to mean? Not even bothering to think about a potential answer I asked.

"Men kind? As opposed to what exactly?"

The three brothers glanced at each other before Dori answered me once more.

"Well, men as opposed to elves, dwarves or hobbits for example…"

Blank. I think my mind actually went totally blank for a few seconds. Were these guys for real? Apparently they were far sicker than I had previously thought. I guessed that my previous strategy was safe as I hadn't been killed or hurt yet. So once again I played along.

"Of course. Dwarves and elves. How silly of me."

Dori and Nori seemed to have a silent conversation and Nori nodded ever so slightly before his older brother turned towards me again and asked.

"Milady, I feel I have to ask you. Are you by any chance entirely foreign to our land and its inhabitants?"

I don't know what it was, his tone or his eyes maybe, but something suddenly made me doubt myself. I hesitated for a moment. These men didn't look sick, yet everything they said and their behaviours just didn't make sense. I took a deep breath and decided to be truthful.

"To be honest mister Dori" I paused a bit, not for dramatic purpose, but simply because I was unsure of what to say. "I'm not entirely certain of what to tell you."

Dori nodded and Nori's suspicious gaze was back, though no sausages were in sight. Ori had stopped scribbling in his notebook since the whole discussion started and simply looked at me and his brothers alternatively.

"Well, I'm sure we'll find more answers for you in Beinne."

And that was it. Dori and Nori started walking once more and Ori followed. Still unsure of what to think but clearly afraid to be left alone I simply joined them.

I was exhausted when we paused for a brief lunch around midday and I can honestly say I was sleepwalking when we finally stopped that evening.

My mind couldn't get around the fact that I hadn't seen anything even remotely close to civilization during the whole day. No roads, fences, electric or phone cables, streetlight or whatever. Not even a plane in the sky. Nothing was there but the pine forest, muddy and grassy ground with large mountains looming not too far from us.

When the three brothers decided to stop, I'm not proud to say I actually let myself fall on the ground. Completely exhausted I didn't even try to look around for a log or rock to sit on. I dozed off while they prepared some stew and shamefully accepted a bowl of their tasty food even though I hadn't done anything to earn it.

"Thank you. You're all being very nice.

-It's perfectly fine milady, we wouldn't leave you alone in the mountains. We'll be in Beinne in a few days and we'll find somewhere for you to inquire about your kin."

There he went again with the strange speeches. I looked at him, raising my eyebrow and asked.

"What do you mean?"

He seemed genuinely puzzled by my question.

"Milady, surely you hope to meet with your escort once more.

-My escort?

-Do you mean to say that you were wandering alone in these parts? Without the protection of your kin?"

When I nodded I distinctly heard Nori say something that sounded like a curse, though I didn't understand which language he had used.

I understood easily enough that yet another weird thing was going on, but I really couldn't fathom what it was. Every time I spoke with these men they said weird things and seemed not to understand what I said.

A soft voice in my head was starting to whisper that maybe, just maybe, something far stranger than I thought was going on. I shut that stupid voice down. I was just lost somewhere in France, nothing more. If I started to believe that something else had happened, it would mean I was becoming as ill as those men were. Maybe their illness was contagious?

I shook my head and looked at Nori who seemed angry about something. Quite tired and not used to avoid speaking my mind, I asked them.

"I'm sorry. I feel something's going on. Why are you all so surprised that I travel alone?"

Surprisingly it was Nori who answered this time.

"Our kin takes care of its women. We would never let them wander the wilderness alone. We protect them. It is…shocking for us to think of a woman left to fend for herself.

-My uncle and aunt gave me money, and France is quite safe."

He scoffed before replying

"Money would not save you from wolves' teeth. And what is Furans anyway?

-France. The country we're currently in. France, where they eat baguette bread and cheese and where the people have an awful temper. And seriously I can't believe the French authorities would let that many dangerous wolves wander around freely.

-We are not in that country you speak of milady" Dori intervened. "We're close to the Elvish land of Forlindon."

I shook my head. There was no use speaking with them, they were far to engrossed in their fantasy world. I sighed and saw quite clearly that the elder brothers were as upset as I was with our communications issues.

Even though we spoke the same language it felt as if we weren't. I ate the stew in silence and was asleep soon after, trying not to think too much about all those weird facts my mind was steadily registering; their ability to speak flawless English was puzzling me already and I didn't want to think about other oddities.

The next three days were spent in a similar fashion. We walked a lot and spoke together politely but not much. Every time we tried, one of us would say something that either I or they didn't understand.

It was in the early afternoon of the third day that Dori said something that forced me to look around.

"Here's Beinne milady. Surely you'll find answers here."

I looked forward and saw what could only be described as a village, certainly not a town. From afar I couldn't see any electric post, paved roads, parking or supermarket. There weren't even any advertisement signs or tall buildings, just small houses that appeared to be built with wood. These small houses had mostly one floor, though a few were slightly higher but none were reaching more than three storeys. There were pastures around and I could see horses and what I guessed to be goats and sheep.

The closer we got to the village, the more dread I felt.

What was this place?

There was only one way to describe the muddy paths, the dirty roads and shabby walls. Only one word came to my mind. Ancient. It looked like a medieval movie stage, complete with the tall men walking around with swords, bows and guiding cows and pigs in the middle of muddy streets.

I stopped dead in my track.

Yep, something was clearly wrong. I don't know why I did what I did next; I can only say my body reacted on its own volition.

I extended my hand and strongly gripped Nori's sleeve. The man looked at me with a questioning glance.

I swallowed the lump in my throat and managed to say in a little, unsure voice.

"Mister Nori, I think I'm really, really lost."

He seemed to see something in my face for he gently took my hand in his and squeezed it lightly.

"Come milady, we'll try to help you find your way back home."

I nodded and followed him. I became suddenly aware of many curious glances and insistent stares sent in my direction and it unnerved me greatly. They weren't so much glaring actually as they were leering at me which made my skin crawl.

What was wrong with these people? I was probably going to yell at the folks around to leave me alone when Dori and Nori both started to walk close to me, Dori at my left and Nori at my right.

Ori I noticed was close behind and was sending fierce glares at every man we encountered and who was looking at me.

"I don't understand why are they staring at me?

-They believe you to be a dwarvish lady, milady, and they're not used to see them.

-What?" I knew I was short with my 5 feet 1, almost 5 feet 2, but still, it was not a reason to stare at me in such a rude way.

"Your foreign clothes are not helping either milady" Nori told me before looking at his brother. "Maybe we should try to find her something more…suitable for this crowd?"

Dori nodded and I felt hugely offended. Looking around once more I realized I was probably the only woman around who wasn't wearing a heavy dress that covered basically every inch of her body.

Looking at my attire I had to admit it was quite different from this place's trends. Still there was nothing indecent in my clothes.

"My clothes are fine." I said angrily.

Nori glanced at me from the corner of his eye before shrugging.

"They might be alright where you come from milady, but here they're … slightly indecent.

-Indecent? In what way are my clothes indecent?" I was shocked.

My jeans were forms fitting but the waist band was quite high and my shirt and hoodie covered me completely. My shirt's neckline wasn't even low and my hoodie reached almost the top of my thighs. There was absolutely no skin showing, nothing.

Surprisingly Nori's cheeks coloured slightly and he cleared his throat before glancing at his brother. Dori didn't seem as nervous but was quite obviously uneasy.

"Well, milady, women around here don't usually wear breeches.

-Breeches?' I chose to ignore that. 'What, why?

-They, hem, they are too…well you see it's considered indecent that, well, we can pretty much see everything."

I frowned. Were they seriously thinking that jeans were indecent? Wow, that was weird.

"Alright" I drawled, unconvinced.

We walked quickly to an old dingy looking house with a larger window at the front. All the time I tried to avoid looking at the copious amount of dirt, mud and waste that covered the streets and smelt awful.

Dori opened the wooden door and I heard a bell ring inside, an actual bell that hung on the other side of the door. Nori gently pushed me with his large hand between my shoulder blades and I was obliged to enter this strange building.

"Master Dori, master Nori!" A booming voice exclaimed from the other end of the room. "Even master Ori came!"

I didn't pay much attention as I was too busy looking around. This was a shop I realized. They were selling metallic objects of all sorts. There were bowls, plates, spoons and knives. I could see cups, tankards, vases too. The only common factors to all those objects were the materials used to create them.

I gingerly approached a table filled with cups of all sorts and I took one in my hands. It was similar to the ones the three brothers had used during our short journey. I couldn't say which metal had been used but still the design, though simple, was greatly enhanced by the carvings decorating it. It was simple yet really pretty.

I looked at the brothers who were discussing with a middle aged man, surely the owner of the shop. So they really were merchants? I had seriously doubted that information. Looking back at the cup in my hand I let my fingers caress the intricate carvings, just lines really, that curved and crisscrossed on the surface in what reminded me vaguely of Celtic patterns.

"Lady Amelia?"

Ori's voice woke me from my observation and I blinked a few times, looking at him.

"Yes?

-Do you wish to stay here or will you join us upstairs for a drink?

-Oh, sorry Ori, I'll follow you."

I put back the cup on the table, cautious not to let it fall though I doubted it would break it. I then followed Ori towards wooden stairs and quickly found myself seated between Ori and Nori at a large wooden table.

"Do you want some chamomile milady?"

Dori asked, already serving himself a cup. I nodded and smiled. I wasn't that fond of this drink but my aunt loved it and to simply smell it from afar brought me fond memories of her. I idly wondered how my aunt and uncle were doing. I had left their house without a word or a message. Basically I had run away and was now ashamed of it. I really hoped they wouldn't worry too much about me for I was starting to have this feeling that I wouldn't see them in awhile.

Dori gave me a cup full of warm yellowish liquid and I thanked him with a smile. The man, the owner of the shop, came in at that moment with a plate full of cheeses and bread.

After he sat down, we all drank and ate in silence for a bit. Nori and the man were drinking from tankards what I guessed to be beer, and Ori hadn't been given a choice, his eldest brother giving him a cup of chamomile. I couldn't help but smile when I saw his doubtful look. A short while later Dori spoke.

"We wish to let you know how sorry we were to hear of your father's passing.

-Thank you Master Dori. He had been sick the whole winter, it was no surprise though we had hoped he'd come through it."

Dori and Nori nodded, both serious and quite grim looking. Dori enquired further a few minutes later.

"How is your family faring Tom?

-It's been hard these past few years. My wife works with me but we don't sale as much as before. The lads are working in the barns and fields too.

-We hadn't heard the situation was complicated for your family.

-T'is not just us. The elves don't come as much in our parts, the trades aren't what they used to be. Without the elves, it's almost half of our sales that are left over. Not many people travel these days, least of all here."

I listened absentmindedly, quite surprised to see that no one was shocked to hear about children working in barns and fields. What was this place? I asked myself for the umpteenth time. This man seemed as crazy as the three others, what with his speech about elves not coming anymore?

I imagined an army of tiny little creatures with pointy hats buying bowls and cups and almost snorted.

When I heard my name though, I forced my brain to concentrate once more on the discussion.

"We'll review the contracts tomorrow if you wish. Today we have to help the lady Amelia.

-Oh I don't want to disturb you all." I intervened blushing.

Nori smirked and Dori gave me a sweet smile.

"Do not worry milady, we promised you we'll help.

-If you want to buy her clothes, you might want to go by Ruth's shop. She's my wife's cousin and does an honest job. She's the best seamstress around.

-Then we'll go there now."

Seamstress? I sighed wondering why I was still surprised. Until now everything was quite consistently strange, there was no use being constantly surprised. As they kept on talking, an idea came to me and I waited for a lull in their conversation to ask the man.

"Excuse me, but do you have a map of this country?

-Country?

-I believe she means a map of our land." Dori gently provided and I nodded.

Apparently the brothers had understood what I wanted to do and eagerly helped the man when he came with a large parchment that he unrolled on the table. Yes, parchment, there was no other word for it. I said already I would not be surprised anymore…

It took me maybe a minute to look at the strange map before I glanced toward Dori. He looked at me expectantly and I felt strangely sorry to disappoint him.

"I don't recognize anything on this map." I said sadly.

"Nothing? Nothing at all?

-No Mister Dori, I don't recognize the area, the mountains, and the cities. It makes no sense whatsoever to me.

-How is that possible? This map represents Middle Earth quite thoroughly, even though the eastern and southern parts are missing."

I shook my head and sighed, rising my hands to cover my eyes. I was starting to grow tired of this whole stunt already. There was no indication as to where I was. People around spoke English, an oddly accented English, but English nonetheless and that was highly incoherent with me being supposedly in the middle of France.

The map didn't make sense, the people didn't make sense. Even the landscape didn't make sense as it didn't look even remotely like it should have been looking.

Ori awkwardly patted my shoulder, trying to cheer me up I imagined. I smiled at him, he was a nice person. His brothers had been nice too. It really wasn't their fault that I was in such a mess.

Looking at them I pondered my next decision for a few minutes. I didn't say a word though until the man left the room once more, going back downstairs. Then I sighed heavily and spoke my mind.

"I'm sorry Mister Dori. I really don't understand where I am. Everything here is unfamiliar. Your clothes, this village, even the way you speak. It's really strange for me and I don't understand how it could be. It shouldn't be. Before I ended up lost in that cave I was in a perfectly known and normal place for me. It's been strange since I got out actually."

The brothers stayed silent until Nori spoke.

"You're strange to us too milady.

-Trust me, I believe that."

They smirked and snorted while I smiled. We all knew something odd was happening, but there truly was nothing I could think about that would change my situation.

"Have you ever met someone like me? I asked them.

-Never milady.

-And you don't know anyone that could help me?"

They looked at each other before Dori answered.

"No one comes to my mind milady.

-Well…"

I stayed silent for a bit and closed my eyes. I could feel many emotions bubbling inside me. I was scared, had been almost constantly scared since I was in that cave. I was nervous and anxious and that feeling of helplessness only worsened it. The lump was back in my throat and I could feel tears starting to burn behind my eyelids.

What was I going to do?

I realized I had spoken aloud when, some moments later, Dori's soft voice told me.

"We understand you're lost and alone milady. If you wished we could talk to the men here and see if you could stay with them."

His answer didn't comfort me in the slightest. I didn't like these people. They stared at me weirdly and were all tall. In my city I was used to be small, but I wasn't the only one. Here the only small people I had met were the three brothers, all the others were towering over me. And the place was beyond dirty. I didn't like it.

My silence must have let them know what I thought of their idea for Ori cleared his throat and talked next.

"Or she could come back home with us."

I opened my eyes and stared at him, utterly surprised. Apparently I wasn't the only one for the two others were staring at the poor Ori who shifted awkwardly on his seat before starting to talk again.

"Well, we found her so she's somehow our responsibility. And she could almost look dwarfish if she had a beard…"

I chose not to pay attention to that last part about a beard and looked at Dori and Nori. Truthfully I didn't know what I was hoping for them to say. I didn't even know if I was hoping for them to say something.

Dori was the first to break the silence.

"T'is true that we are responsible of the lady Amelia.

-How so?" I couldn't help but ask.

Nori pondered before answering.

"We're the ones who found you. You're obviously alone here and we're the only persons you know.

-I don't want to impose on you because of some twisted logic.' I grimaced.

-That's not it. We told you, our kin is very protective of his women. Abandoning you here when you're alone would be wrong.

-You could come back to the mountains with us milady if you so wish." Dori said finally, nodding to himself as if he had taken a very important decision.

I took some time to think about it. I didn't seem to have much choice; either I stayed there by myself, or I followed them back to wherever their home was. The real question here was whether or not I could really trust them.

They had indeed seemed quite protective of me earlier and seeing that the whole area was apparently stuck in a medieval bubble somehow reassured me about their sanity, even if it was only slightly.

I really couldn't make my mind for both choices seemed absurd in some way. Yet I felt in my bones that I couldn't stay in that village. I shivered, thinking back at the stares. The people around here were probably nice and all. But they really had left me with a very, very bad first impression, whereas Dori, Nori and Ori had been nothing but friendly and nice if slightly strange.

I looked Dori in the eyes and asked him.

"Do you really have no idea where my home could be?

-No milady. We share the same impression you do. You're not from these lands, but we don't know anything else than that.

-And you would really offer me to follow you back to your place?

-Yes milady."

I took a deep breath as my next question might offend them.

"What would my coming with you entail exactly?"

Nori smirked and Dori smiled at that. They didn't seem offended in the slightest, which surprised me greatly. I was even more puzzled when Ori joyously said.

"We could draw a contract!"

* * *

Three hours later I was still sitting with the three men, an impossibly long parchment unrolled in front of Ori who was happily scribbling on it.

"So, we have already covered the issues of lodging, food, daily expenses and bonds and boundaries between the two parties and their interactions." Dori recapitulated before Ori spoke.

"Should we add a paragraph for the funeral arrangements?

-Absolutely not!

-Sure"

I stared wide eyed at Dori who wanted to add this paragraph and I couldn't help but ask

"Do you plan to kill me?

-No but we should cover all grounds milady. Don't worry; we dwarves are quite efficient at drawing sound contracts.

-I'm sure you are."

I was starting to have a headache and the three brothers were clearly enjoying themselves. Well Dori and Ori were enjoying themselves, Nori was simply amused.

After two more hours we finally decided that the contract was ready to be signed. It did cover everything that came to mind when thinking about the close future. They even added a part about petty money and a special paragraph stating that any additional paragraph could be added under the strict agreement of all four concerned persons…

Whatever… I had studied to become a surgeon, not a lawyer. Anyway I was happy to sign their contract and be done with it, even though I slightly felt like I had just agreed to be a kept house wife…without the wife part thankfully. Basically they'd take care of me and wouldn't ask anything of me in exchange of a private room in their house except keeping it clean or taking care of the daily shopping.

They hadn't been disturbed by the idea that I could live with them without paying them anything for the lodging or food. It had been quite the opposite actually; they had looked offended when I had asked how I could earn money to pay them for their help.

When I had inquired and insisted about that they had simply repeated that they had grown up learning that women should be pampered. That was probably supposed to explain as well the line that went saying that they would not abandon me under any condition and will care for me until one of my kin or a potential suitor presented itself.

Well I was not such a feminist anyway and in this unknown environment I didn't mind much our agreement. Though the 'suitor' part had me laugh for a good ten minutes. I had refused to explain to them that it was unlikely that such a person would pop out here, seeing as none had been interested where I came from.

After all I was considered a prude by my acquaintances. Well they called it prude, I called it shy and study focused.

After my signature was written next to Dori's, Nori's and Ori's I strangely felt as if a weight had been lifted from my shoulder.

I didn't really understand why I felt like this. After all many people would not trust a piece of paper to protect them and they would be right not to. Still I had this feeling that I could trust the three brothers not to break our contract.

They then decided that it was high time for me to buy some appropriate clothes so I followed them back outside.

We walked past a small market where the main merchandises were fruits and vegetables. I saw some sorts of wooden objects and furs too from afar but didn't pay much attention. Dori lead the way toward a small house nearby the market and gestured for me to enter.

The tiny bell rang above the door and a middle aged woman appeared from behind heavy curtains in the back.

"Hello there. What can I do for you Masters Dwarves?

-Would you have some dresses fit for our kin?

-I might have some dresses I made for the baker's daughter. She didn't take them all though so I guess I could show you a few I have left.

-May we see them please?"

I had stayed hidden behind Dori during the whole exchange. Turning my gaze toward Nori I frowned. He was eating an apple, yet I couldn't remember seeing him buy one. Apparently Dori had seen the fruit too for he started to whisper angrily.

"Nori, can't you stop these awful habits for a minute? We've been here merely a few hours and outside only a few minutes and you're already doing it!"

Nori simply shrugged and bit in the fruit, a smile gracing his lips. He winked at me when he saw I had observed them. I shook my head and my attention turned to the woman who was coming back to us. Dori was still admonishing his brother who clearly didn't even bother listening.

"Here Master Dwarves…oh! I'm sorry milady, I hadn't seen you. Oh…I see. Do you wish to try them?"

The way she had looked at my clothes had me blush furiously. Seriously was it so wrong around here to wear trousers when you were a woman?

I didn't like dresses much and these ones especially were not to my taste. They were made from thick wool and didn't look comfortable at all. One was in dark blue colour, the second mud brown and the third was dark green. So cheerful…

I followed the woman to the back of the shop, still hearing Dori complaining about his brother's behaviour in ushered tones. She asked me to strip and brought me some sort of white linen dress and underpants. Were those supposed to be underwear? I bet even my grandmother never had to wear such…things.

I point blank refused to strip from my panties and bra and just gingerly put the linen dress and the underpants on top of them before trying the dresses. I wondered silently when and even if they had been washed, and if so how, for their smell was… not quite fresh. Everything was a little tight; the dresses were too small for me and highly uncomfortable, clearly not suited for my silhouette.

They compressed my chest and stomach uncomfortably and I could barely move my arms for fear of tearing the sleeves.

The seamstress tried to smile at me, but failed, and told me to put on my own clothes back before leaving me to go and talk with Dori again. I could hear her explaining she had some work to do on the dresses and that they'd be ready for the next day in the late morning.

I walked back toward the brothers, my hand already in my hoodie's pocket, ready to retrieve one of the only objects I had with me; my wallet which contained a few bills and coins. I had some pounds left and some euro. Though I had the feeling those currencies would be useless here. I was right when I saw Dori give a few metallic coins to the woman. Those had been copper or maybe silver, I hadn't seen properly and I didn't feel like asking.

"You don't look really happy milady. I thought all women liked to buy new things."

Nori's voice behind me startled me and I would have fallen flat on my face after ungracefully stumbling on my feet if he hadn't catch my waist just in time. The idiot even dared to chuckle while I glared at him.

"So?"

He asked once more after letting me take a few steps back.

"Nori, we just signed a contract that stipulate I'm quite basically dependant on you guys. Plus your brother is currently paying for my clothes and what is apparently considered underwear here. I think you can forget the 'milady'."

He laughed softly. I was starting to realize that Nori was always moving around fairly noiselessly, didn't speak loudly and didn't even laugh loudly. His brothers were quiet too but not to his extent. I was pondering on this new thought when he winked once more at me. Was it going to become a habit, I wondered.

"Aye. T'is true. What shall I call you then?

-Amelia, it's my name you know." I deadpanned.

He chuckled some more while Ori made his way towards us.

"What is it brother, Milady?

-I was just telling your brother that you could all call me simply Amelia. It's really strange for me to hear all the 'milady this' and 'lady that'.

-Don't you use such terms in your lands, mi…Amelia?" Ori asked curiously.

"Not really no. we just use our names, sometimes we add a title but as I pointed to your brother, we signed a contract so…

-You mentioned us seeing your underwear too." Nori interrupted.

I have to say, the deep red blush that covered poor Ori's face was quite cute and fun to observe. Yet I did glare at his brother.

"I don't recall mentioning you seeing anything.

-Well paying, seeing…t'is the same thing.

-Not really."

Dori's arrival stopped our discussion and I let a blubbering Ori trying to explain his blush to his oldest brother while Nori and I sneaked back outside.

The four of us spent the rest of the afternoon wandering around in the town and the market. Well actually I wanted to wander around and the brothers had to buy supplies. Nothing major happened and I felt like I was in some sort of medieval fair, except these guys were for real.

The intense staring crept me out quickly though and I didn't leave Nori's side, oddly enough I found his presence reassuring. Ori was always close by and Dori was busy talking with suppliers and buying food for our travel back to their home.

Later that day we went back toward the first house we'd been in and Dori didn't wait for the shop owner to welcome us and directly went upstairs. I followed while he explained the owner usually let them use a room when they happened to pass by.

We entered a small room with just one small bed as Dori explained that they usually took bets to know who'd be using the bed. Yet, he said, this time they'd let me use it while they'd sleep on the floor.

I am not ashamed to admit I didn't even try to fight their gracious decision. After three nights spent sleeping on the floor, I was really glad to have something resembling a mattress to sleep on.

Now I had just one thing to ask Dori and I was slightly nervous. He must have realized that something was bothering me for he directly came to ask me.

"What is it Miss Amelia."

I tried not to smile, I really did. Yet the fact that the sweet Dori just couldn't help but be somehow polite and formal was funny. I knew he didn't mean anything with it. It was apparently just deeply ingrained in his skull that he had to be polite with women. Weird for someone like me but fun nonetheless.

"Dori, I'd like to know. Is there a place where I could…you know…wash?"

And this simple sentence had me a short hour later in quite an unpleasant situation.

* * *

**A/N: First of all I'd like to thank the three amazing reviewers Nori'sLilTheif, VanessaAndEllieTheVamps, and the Guest who wrote the first review. Thank you, I hope not to disappoint you. And yes, the lack of Nori/OC fics was actually what motivated me. :) I believe a dwarf with such and hairdo shouldn't be forgotten...**

**This chapter was quite long, but I didn't want to cut it before that point, the others won't usually reach this length.**

**About the OC, I don't know exactly how medical studies go. I didn't study such topics. I just believe they do have exams. If not, well...sorry for the mistake.**

**I hope there isn't too many English mistakes, and sorry if I end up mixing US and UK vocabulary...**

**The next chapter will be posted sometimes during the week.**


	3. The King in the Mountain

**Nothing belongs to me, except my OC and the plot of this story.**

* * *

I had been standing there for at least ten minutes, looking at the…wooden bathtub filled with water that was in the middle of the room. It didn't look dirty per se. it just didn't look clean at all. I could see some dirt floating in it, and a twig too. Wait, was that? Dear lord there even was some kind of dead insect in that water.

I swallowed, wondering whether I should risk it. I suddenly felt like staying dirty and smelly for awhile. It was a middle age area, or so it looked, so I asked myself what exactly I had been expecting to find when I asked to wash. Apparently the water came from a well, an actual well, a hole in the ground really, that was being used by almost half of the population around at least. I had been shocked to say the least when the shop owner asked his sons to bring the water upstairs, one bucket at a time.

I put my hand in the water, it was barely lukewarm. I stifled an annoyed groan and decided to go for it. I was dirty, I hadn't had a shower in days and I stank. Besides I was quite certain I had twigs in my hair from sleeping outside. I silently cursed the brownish mane I called hair and that was probably resembling a vulture's nest right now…yes with the dead animals in it.

I had to wash, this wasn't even an option.

I removed slowly my clothes. I wasn't a neat freak, but this was hard. Stepping in the tub was an actual trial. I muttered a curse when the definitely too cold water hit my bare skin. Seriously could anyone tell me when pipes and heaters would be invented? Or better yet, couldn't anyone invent them already?

I quickly grasped the bar that was supposed to be soap and quickly washed my body, standing in the tub to minimize my contact with the water. It might have been ridiculous of me to behave like this but I really, really couldn't react in any other way. I was used to comfort, and comfort meant heated water in a pristine white tub and scented bubbles and soap.

This soap was scentless, which was really unusual for me, but it did its work fairly well. The hardest part though was yet to come, as I wanted to wash my hair. Seeing twigs and dirt starting to float around in the cloudy water quickly decided me and I almost jumped out of the tub, hair dripping water but still unwashed.

I put the linen towel around me and tilted so that only my hair would touch the water, quickly washed and rinsed them as best as I could. Cringing all the while at the thought of the dirty liquid I was using to clean myself.

I was relatively clean and felt ten times better once it was all over. I dried my body before rolling the towel around my hair. I glanced at my clothes, they were tattered and muddy, yet I had nothing else to wear. I put on my bra and used the little basin full of cold water that was on a table in the room, to wash my panties.

I wouldn't wear them wet though so I grimaced and put on my jeans directly. I hated the sensations and feelings of it against my bare skin, yet I didn't have much choices. Looking at my shirt I put it aside, hoping to keep it and clean it later on and I put directly my hoodie. The neckline was significantly lower than that of my shirt, but you couldn't see anything really.

I took what belonged to me and stepped through the door. Now came the moment of the awkward question to Dori. What should I do with the water? I knew the shop owner had been nice enough to go and pick it for me, but where should we throw it away?

I swear it made my stomach churn when Dori told me they wouldn't throw it and would just use it for themselves. Water, especially for a bath, was a luxury and there was apparently no way they would just bath once and threw the water.

Ewww.

I am still unsure whether I should have been relieved or disgusted when Dori told me that him and his brother wouldn't bath tonight…

After that charming discussion I was sitting by myself in our room, trying to untangle the mess of my hair with my hands, when Nori entered.

He smirked and walked straight toward me. His steps faltered slightly when he came closer and I only saw he was looking in my direction. I quirked an eyebrow at him but he simply cleared his throat and clearly avoided to look in my direction. I wondered what was happening to him but hadn't the time to ask.

"Here"

He said before holding a comb in front of my face. It was nicely crafted, entirely sculpted in wood and with a nice design on each side that represented flowers. I took it carefully and looked at Nori, amazed.

"It's beautiful! Where did you get that?

-Here or there, who knows?"

I lifted one eyebrow and looked at him suspiciously which only served to make him chuckle. I swear this man was never taking anything I said seriously.

"I'll give it back to you quickly.

-No need. It's yours.

-What?

-Call it a gift for celebrating our new contract." He said punctuating his words with a wink.

I looked at the comb and back at him, uncertain of what to say.

"Are you sure? It's a nice comb and you have a much more complicated hairdo than I have."

He snorted and I could see his grey eyes twinkle with amusement.

"I already have one. Now you got yours.

-Thanks then."

We remained silent for awhile and I painfully combed my hair, grimacing and wincing each time it got stuck in a knot. Nori was sitting with his back against the wall and he had produced small knives and daggers as well as other indiscernible tools and what looked like a sort of stone. He had carefully disposed them on the floor in front of him and analyzed them intently.

I concentrated on my hair and simply didn't pay attention to him and his doings. I don't know how long it took me to unknot the whole length but I was quite tired by the end of it. I was starting to ask myself whether having hair that reached the middle of my back was such a good idea.

"I probably should tie or braid them like you guys do." I half said to myself half told him.

"Aye, you probably should." He answered absentmindedly.

I glanced at him. He was cleaning or at least taking care of one of his daggers when my eyes drifted to his braided hair and beard.

"Can you braid my hair for me please?"

The dagger fell on the ground in a loud clatter and he looked at me with eyes wide as saucers and his mouth slightly open. I could see a small dust of red colouring his cheeks.

"Did I say something wrong?" I asked him after a long awkward silence.

Apparently my question shook him out of his daze and I watched him shaking his head as if to clear it.

"Yeah, no.' He cleared his throat loudly before frowning.'I mean no, you didn't say anything wrong. Don't you know how to tie your hair?"

Was that what had shocked him? Did he think I wasn't even able to do such a simple thing? I huffed and replied slightly angry.

"Of course I know how. It's just your beard looks nice, and I only know how to do a very basic braid. It'd be nice of you if you would braid my hair in a nice, stylish way.

-Basic is good. Very very good. Do your basic braid and sleep."

Now I was clearly offended. Who did he think I was? Some child that he could order around?

I probably would have started to snap at him if Dori and Ori hadn't entered the room at that moment. I grumpily braided my hair, ignoring the curious glances Dori and Ori sent my way. Muttering a 'good night' I turned my back to them and quickly fell asleep in spite of my angry state of mind.

* * *

I woke up alone in the room the following morning and used that alone time to quickly put on the now dried panties. I stepped toward the kitchen area and could hear the men talking together. Well actually Dori and Ori were discussing with the shop owner and Nori was nowhere to be seen.

It took only one glance from afar to the long roll of parchment for me to guess that they were discussing their renewed contract. I didn't even bother to talk to them; they were so busy with their talk that they hadn't even noticed my presence.

I went slowly downstairs to look around the shop in order to pass the time.

Nori was there, going around in the shop and noting things on a small parchment. He smiled at me when I approached and let me look over his shoulder. I couldn't understand what he wrote, he was using some weird symbols, but it did somehow look like a list.

"What's this?

-A list" he simply answered and proceeded to write some more on his parchment.

"I can guess as much. But what are you listing?

-Products we should craft and send here.

-What? What do you mean?"

I looked at him, clearly surprised. Surely he didn't mean to say that he was the one crafting those beautiful cups and bowls?

He glanced at me and laughed at my obvious disbelief.

"Aye. We're one of this shop's main suppliers. We provide them with almost all their copper products.

-Really? You did this?"

He snorted while I held a finely engraved cup in my hand.

"I didn't. But I know the dwarf who did. We're merchants, or at least Dori is. We trade the products crafted by the others and take our share of the income. "

I chose to ignore the dwarf comment. My mind wasn't even close to be ready to start thinking about this. I continued to ask him some more questions though.

"You said 'Dori is'. What are you supposed to do then? And Ori? He looks quite young, what does he do?"

Nori barked a laugh at that. He was even clenching his stomach with one hand leaning on the table next to him. It shocked me to see him being so loud after days of being relatively quiet.

"Don't worry about Ori's age. Trust me, he's old enough to work, he's a clerk, he mostly works with merchants, doing listing, accountings that sort of things, but sometimes he's asked to help write down contracts. Though he writes down almost everything he can think about. I swear that lad cost a fortune in parchment."

Nori's eyes reflected pride as he spoke of his little brother and it was easy to see that he cared greatly about him. I was surprised though by all those information to say the least, but it didn't quench my curiosity so I kept on bothering Nori.

"And what do you do then, besides writing list?

-I'm in trades too…sort of.

-Sort of?

-Sort of"

As he clearly didn't want to talk more I simply hummed and let him alone to his work. I was quite occupied really, looking at the beautiful craft. Each cup, bowl and vase had lots of details, each time different than the others. I felt like I was in a museum and time flied without me taking notice of it.

It was already late in the morning when Dori came up next to me, a package rolled in his left hand and a seemingly empty leather backpack in the other.

"Hello Dori.

-Hello Miss Amelia. Here are the clothes we bought yesterday. I thought you might wish to change before we leave. And here's a backpack for you too.

-Are we leaving now?" I asked him simply while taking the package and then the back pack he was holding out to me.

"We'll take some lunch and leave soon after. We have a long walk back home.

-I thank you for the clothes Dori, and the bag, really. But when it's just the three of us on the road, would you mind if I keep wearing my current clothes? It'll be more comfortable to walk with my jeans than with a dress."

The older man seemed to hesitate a bit before looking over at my clothes.

"I guess it'll be easier for you to walk with these indeed. You'll have to change quickly before we enter the first town though.

-I don't mind, really, I'd rather walk in jeans than in a dress." I quickly said, nervous that he'd change his mind.

It might sound silly for me to ask for his advice about my clothes, but I really didn't want to disturb them about such a stupid thing. I somehow felt kind of indebted toward the three brothers. I didn't particularly like the feeling, but it was true that I owed them a lot, so I decided now to do my best not to bother them…too much.

* * *

I was exhausted. The three brothers were as short as I was, but they were walking fast, really fast compared to me. I was at least thankful that my backpack only contained my clothes and a cup, bowl and spoon they had insisted to buy for me.

We had been on the road for the past four or five days, I didn't actually remember which was scary, and we were supposed to arrive in a few days in another town that had established itself close to their home. I was starting to get used to the brothers' antics and it was quite entertaining to observe them.

We had been following small paths and then a larger way they called a road and that had brought us to the feet of the magnificent mountains before making us cross them to their other side without much difficulty. The landscape was simply amazing and, had I not been so tired all the time, I would have greatly enjoyed it.

The mountains' tops were high and there was snow and ice on them that glinted blue in the sunlight. We didn't go high before crossing to the other side though and I remember being grateful for that. The rocks around had a very nice blue tinge to them which gave the whole area a peculiar atmosphere. Forests of pine trees mostly covered the plains nearby and I remember stopping at some point simply to take in the scenery.

It had been an amazing and breathtaking sight.

Though it had been scary to see so far away, and not being able to pinpoint anything that could be related to any sort of technology.

I might be a fool and I might come to regret it, but I was seriously starting to trust my three companions. In all honesty I appreciated their company. They even managed to make me forget about my home, though that never lasted.

During our wandering days I had had quite a lot of free time to think about my situation. I had no idea where I was and the clear absence of civilization was quite scary. But more than the actual fact that I was lost, it was the thoughts of my uncle and aunt that haunted me.

I didn't know when I'd meet with them again and I deeply regretted to have run away without saying goodbye. They were amazing people, they had taken care of me as if was their own child and I was ashamed of how I had repaid them their kindness. First failing my exams and letting them down, and then this; running away wordlessly and getting myself in such a situation…

Oh god, I would become one of those disappearing people who came back decades later and couldn't adapt to their previous habits anymore.

I shook my head. I missed them. I missed them terribly.

They were my parents, my family.

It was my aunt who had taught me how to put make up, how to brush and braid my hair in a basic way but still, how to cook sweets and pastries. She had been the one to listen to me when I had troubles in school and the one to hold me when I cried. She had always been a calm, peaceful person and I could always find an attentive listener to my thoughts in her. She had replaced my mother.

My uncle on the other hand had always been a cheerful presence in my life, encouraging me with small gestures instead of long speeches. He had brought me snacks at midnight when I was preparing my exams; he had taught me how to drive, shown me all his favourite movies, brought me to the library every week and bought me all the books I wanted to read. It had become our private joke that I should open a library of my own with all the books I already had.

I couldn't even start to imagine what life could be like without them close to me. I felt like an awful person to have abandoned them like I did. It was ungrateful and cruel of me.

My feelings must have shown on my face because Ori decided to come and talk with me a bit.

"Amelia I wanted to ask you something.

-Hmm" I nodded, waiting for the ever curious Ori to speak his mind.

"You said you were wandering alone in the wild, why is that?

-Again with the alone part?" It was starting to become a tad too repetitive for my taste.

"No, I'm wondering about why you would wish to wander in the wild. Where you looking for something in particular?

-No, I told you I was on holiday.

-Holiday?

-You don't have those?" I was stunned when he shook his head.

That was harsh. I couldn't imagine I would enjoy working every day of my life without ever having the prospect of nice holidays in some sunny parts of the world.

When I saw him taking his notebook out of one of his pockets I smiled and started to explain what holidays were, where people would go, what they'd do, those sorts of things. We were still talking about it when Dori and Nori decided we ought to stop and prepare to camp for the night.

"So you were there to enjoy the scenery and some time by yourself. Fascinating. Your people have very strange habits."

I laughed at his comment and nodded, I guessed it would appear strange to them.

"And what do you do when you are not on holiday?

-Well, people in general are working.

-Yes, I understand that, but what were you doing? Did you work?

-I was studying. I wanted to become a surgeon but it didn't really work out.

-What's a surgeon?

-A doctor. You know, those people you go to when you're sick and they patch you up, help you heal." I was certain he hadn't understood all the words I had said, but apparently 'heal' was a word they all knew for Dori and Nori looked at me slightly impressed.

"You're a healer in training?" Dori asked me with wide eyes.

"Well you could put it like that, yes. But I failed the last part of my training so I was depressed and decided to go see some new places and…you found me." I resumed head held low. I was still upset about the whole exams failure apparently.

"Did you, you know, kill someone?" Ori inquired in a whisper.

"Ori, you don't ask such things!" Dori admonished him while I reacted in a rather strong way.

I jumped away from the stone I'd been sitting on and looked at Ori with horrified eyes, answering quickly.

"God no! I wouldn't talk about it so casually if I had killed someone!

-But, you said you failed the last part of your training…

-My exams, it consists of questions asked on paper and discussions and other stuff…nothing to do with actually healing someone.

-But how can you train to heal if you just read and discuss?"

I opened my mouth to answer to Ori's honest question but no sounds came out. I closed it back and frowned, starting to check in my mind all the arguments I could come up with. I had the feeling it would be a pain to try and explain med school to them, especially the whole intern and then thesis parts, and I wasn't sure they'd understand. I was also certain they wouldn't agree with my points, so I simply shrugged and didn't bother to answer.

After a while Dori spoke softly to me

"Well, if you wish to continue your training, we could introduce you to one of our healers back at home. He'd take you as an apprentice."

I pondered on this new information for a bit. It could be interesting and it would certainly be a more useful activity than simply cleaning their house. Besides if I cleaned the house every day it would soon shine and I couldn't believe that three men could dirty it quickly enough for me to be occupied all day long and all week long.

"That would be really nice Dori. I'd love to continue my, hem, training here."

He nodded and we stayed silent as I helped him prepare some vegetables we had for a soup. Nori and Ori groaned. None of them looked particularly happy that evening which surprised me as they were usually quite merry during dinner times.

I was quickly adapting to this sort of life and it scared me a bit, but on the other hand wasn't the ability to adapt a particularity of humanity?

The following days were all so similar that I couldn't at some point remember for exactly how long we'd been walking.

I was trying to recall each day that had passed when Dori and Nori stopped and turned towards me.

"Miss Amelia, you should go change into your dress now, we'll soon arrive in the town that's close to our home.

-Oh, sure"

I looked around and found some bushes big enough to hide me from view while I'll basically be stripping. I adjusted the bag on my shoulder and went to hide myself.

"Don't hesitate to shout if anything happen.' Dori told me as I walked away from them.

-Don't worry." I reassured him while Nori muttered something that sounded like "stop fussing…"

It didn't take me long to change, mostly because I wasn't exactly fond of parading around naked, and we were soon back on the road.

I soon realized I had been totally right in deciding to wear my jeans until now. The dress was adjusted to my side but its hem kept on brushing on the floor, getting stuck in twigs and other tall grass. It hindered my movements greatly and considerably slowed me down. It was a pain to walk with it in such an environment.

The three brothers were patient enough, but Nori couldn't help but smirk mockingly at me which caused me to glare at him endlessly.

I was relieved to see the first smoke from chimneys when we arrived close to the town. I expected to find another creepy village with people starring at me in odd ways. I was happy to see I'd been wrong.

This village was significantly bigger and, though I did receive some surprised and curious stare, they weren't nearly as bad as what they'd been in the other place.

The first thing that caught my sight though, was that this time we weren't the only shorter people around. There were quite a lot of us actually and all of them had massive and impressive braided hair and beards. And somehow seemed for most of them to have impressive bellies too…

"Home isn't far now, just a little walk left." Dori informed me while we didn't even slow down in the town.

"Is it on the other side of this town?' I asked curious

-It's in the mountain. It's a city independent from this town. This is a men's town, we live within our own halls." Dori explained with a smile.

I didn't really understand what he had meant, but didn't ask further for I'd soon see the answers for myself anyway. I kept on glancing around the town we crossed, slightly amazed when I saw stands with amazing jewels on display. Looking around I realized that metallic items and jewels were present everywhere.

I followed them along a paved road, the first I had seen so far, that went all the way to the mountain. As I glanced forward I startled and stumbled. Hadn't it been for Ori's very good reflexes I would have fallen flat on the road.

"Are you alright Amelia?' Ori asked me worried.

-There's a door in the mountain!" I couldn't help but exclaim, pointing at the massive door I could already see from afar.

Nori and Dori laughed and the eldest one took me by the arm, gently forcing me to follow him while he explained.

"Aye. I told you we leave in the mountain. Not outside but below the ground. It's the way of dwarves, though the halls here are fairly smaller than in our other realms.

-Inside. Dwarves. Right.' I was completely stunned but Dori didn't stop his explanations.

-You are about to enter Thorin's Halls. He's our king. We'll have to meet with him as soon as we enter for our agreement might not please him much.

-What, why?

-You're not a dwarf, or at least we don't think you are, even if you are really short for the race of men. It's unheard of, a man leaving in one of our halls."

I decided to ignore the whole 'race' part and concentrate on this new problem. Did this mean what I thought it meant?

"Are you telling me that your king might forbid me from staying with you?"

Dori's face was deadly serious, bordering on grim, when he nodded and answered.

"He could very well do so.

-But…but what then?" I was actually scared to think the brothers might in the end abandon me at the entrance of their home.

How stupid and unlucky would it be for me to have walked so far to end up facing a closed door? I was starting to get nervous and anxious. I bit my lower lips and clenched my fists. Dori had no difficulties to find out those news had upset me and he patted my shoulder softly.

"Don't worry missy, Thorin is fair. He will understand.

-What if he doesn't?' I couldn't help but ask.

-Then we'll just have to find another solution. He might ask you to live in the men town we just crossed."

Obviously this would be a nice compromise but it didn't sit well with me. I didn't really understand it myself, but I had in a short time span come to trust and appreciate the three brothers. They were the first and only really friendly faces I had met and I didn't like the idea of being kicked out simply because I wasn't part of their fantasy world of dwarves and elves.

The closer we got to the massive door, the more anxious I got. I didn't even pay attention to the impressive display of mastery those doors and their immediate surrounding presented. I didn't even see the stone statues on each side that were as high as the stone and wooden doors, that is, at least ten meters high if not more.

I didn't look up to see the carved ceiling; neither did I look around to observe the richly decorated walls and columns. The blue tinge of the rocks was more pronounced in there but I didn't pay any attention to it for the three brothers took me straight toward large doors and then walked me up decorated stairs and through some more corridors and stone bridges to an enormous room.

At the other end of the room, just facing the entrance, was a throne like carved stone and in front of it I could see men discussing together. Their talk stopped though when they saw us enter the room.

Dori walked straightforward, putting my left hand in the crook of his elbow and patting it reassuringly. Nori was walking on my other side and I could feel Ori's presence in my back.

When we stopped a few steps away from the group of men, Dori, Nori and probably Ori too, bowed slightly, which encouraged me to do the same. I had no idea who I was bowing to though.

"Master Dori, Nori, Ori, how is the trade faring in the south?"

The man who spoke had barely glanced at me with his cold blue eyes.

He was scary. Really scary. I guessed he was the king and all my hopes flew out the windows, this man would never bend his traditions for good old me. I cast my eyes downwards, not even paying attention to their discussion and trying to imagine what my solitary life would be like.

I hoped Dori, Nori and Ori would visit me from time to time, but I had to be realistic, I would have to live by myself in this foreign land without their help to try and adapt. The sound of my name brought my attention back to the present moment.

"This is the Lady Amelia. We met her some time before we arrived in Beinne. She was hurt and alone in the mountains." Dori explained.

I was slightly surprised to hear hisses and several whispers when he said that though I really shouldn't have; what with all their talks about woman being protected and so on.

"She's entirely alone and foreign to our lands. None of her kin followed her here."

I think this time I heard a curse and I glanced around. There were three other men aside from the one I thought to be the king. Dori continued.

"When we arrived in Beinne, the men were especially rude to her due to her size and she was scared and upset."

At this the men frowned, one with an impressive white beard nodded sadly.

"Thus we thought it our responsibility to take her in our care. Here is the contract we drew and signed."

At this Dori produced the roll of parchment we had signed and handed it to the white bearded man who quickly unrolled it and skimmed through it after putting some strange looking glasses.

"It's a thorough contract Thorin and there is the possibility to add new binding paragraphs if

they all agree to it.

-Aye' Said Dori before adding 'and we were thinking about adding another already. The Lady Amelia had been a healer in training before coming to our lands and she would agree, even wish, to continue her training here."

All the men stared at me then, slightly impressed though I couldn't understand what was so impressive. The king, Thorin, was staring at me and gestured me to come forward. I swallowed the lump in my throat and let Dori's reassuring arm go, taking a few steps toward the king.

His presence was intimidating and I didn't like it one bit, but his stern face became slightly softer quite suddenly and he asked me in a deep rumbling voice.

"Why don't you wish to go back to your home?

-I do. Wish to go back there that is, but I can't. I don't know the way back."

I had stated the truth I had known all along but it somehow broke my heart to hear it aloud for the first time. I didn't know the way back home. I had no way to go back. I was truly lost.

I hadn't pay attention to the hurtful glances the men exchanged. I didn't know that I had said something that would tug at their heartstring quite strongly. I didn't know they longed for their own home, far away in the east.

I felt a heavy hand on my shoulder and brought my head back up to stare in the cold blue eyes. They were slightly warmer now.

"I would agree for you to stay here, but you will have to swear an oath to me and sign a contract. I cannot accept you in my halls without some reassurances."

I thought about it and I think they appreciated that I took the time to ponder this new information before talking. I had to clear my throat several times though and it was quite embarrassing.

"I wouldn't mind swearing an oath and signing a contract, but I cannot promise you I will do it until I know exactly what conditions it will entail."

Strangely enough they all seemed pleased by my reaction. I would have thought they'd feel offended by my lack of trust. Yet the king nodded ever so slightly and I could see approval in the other's eyes.

"The young lass has the mind of a dwarf." The white bearded one chuckled.

Dori and Nori seemed especially proud and pleased. Then the king spoke once more, but to the white bearded man, not to me.

"Balin, take her to your study and start to draw a contract with her.' Turning back towards me he added 'You can ask one of the brothers to accompany you if you so wish."

I nodded and glanced at Dori who simply smiled proudly. I was certain I hadn't understood everything that had happened for a lot of unsaid information had apparently been exchanged under my nose. Yet the confidence in Dori's eyes made me realize the king would actually allow me to stay after some formalities had been taken care of.

Suddenly I could breathe with more ease and the ever present lump in my throat lessened.

These men were imposing and scary, even though they were all just as short as me. But even if I found them slightly weird, I had to admit they were nice enough. Yes, these people had been nothing but kind with me so far.

As I walked behind Balin and Dori I realized I had just talked to a king in quite a casual way.

The lump and scare were brutally back with a vengeance.

Will they punish me for being so unceremonious?

* * *

**A/N: Thank you to everyone who reviewed/favorited/followed/read this story. All the encouragements are a huge motivation. I hadn't planned on posting this chapter so early in the week, but after reading your nice reviews, I couldn't help but edit it and update it. **

**I cannot promise the next will be updated tomorrow, but I know it will be posted at least by Saturday. **

**I welcome criticism, I'm sometimes unsure about the sentence and I fear they don't really sound English. Don't hesitate to PM me if you see mistakes.**


	4. Of Bearded Women and Ageless Folk

**I don't own anything, it all belongs to JRR Tolkien, with the exception of my OC and the plot**

* * *

"I, Amelia Stanson, swear solemnly on my honour and that of my family that I would be faithful to the King Thorin Oakenshield, son of Thráin, son of Thrór, and Heir to Durin's line. I swear to be faithful to his line and heirs and to never divulgate the secrets of the Halls to men, elves or any creatures who isn't a dwarf of Thorin's Halls. I swear to bear true allegiance to the King and his kin. I swear never to break the trust put in me and swear my life to my King and his kin. I swear to act in accordance with and in the respect of his laws. I swear to act for the benefits of the King and his kin and never act against the interests of the Dwarves of Thorin's Halls. From this day onwards to the end of my life I take this oath and pledge my allegiance to Thorin Oakenshield, his heirs and successors."

I couldn't believe I was uttering those words. It felt foreign on my tongue. It was awkward to say the least to pledge one's allegiance to a king, especially for someone coming from twenty-first century. This oath had sounded so cheesy, so corny, had I not been the one kneeling on the stones, I think I'd have snickered. Who was I kidding? I would have been rolling on the floor laughing.

I had the feeling those words had a deep meaning in here and I was entirely aware that, were I to break my oath, I'd be in trouble. Real trouble. Potentially lethal troubles if I were to believe the cold sword's tip, which was currently touching the hollow of my throat.

I was kneeling in front of Thorin Oakenshield, looking in his cold blue eyes while he held his sword against my throat.

I had already signed an enormous contract stipulating quite thoroughly what I was allowed to do and what I wasn't. From what I had gathered I had somehow been placed officially under the care of the Dwarves of Thorin's Halls. Thorin was now my King. In all intent and purpose I was becoming something akin to a refugee who just acquired limited citizenship. Hurray.

If I were to be entirely honest though, I had troubles accepting the fact that he actually could order me around and I would have no choice but to obey or risk breaking our contract and my oath, and subsequently sort of forfeit my life.

Dori and Balin had reassured me, saying that they had added a clause in the contract stipulating that all life altering orders from my King were to be approved by my two appointed direct guardians; Dori and Balin. The only exception being a bit of a repetition; in case of me breaking the contract, Thorin could basically do whatever he wanted without Dori or Balin stepping in.

And why had I two guardians? I had asked. Well, to put it simply Balin had been appointed in name of the King and, they had argued, there wouldn't be any tie if they were to discuss my future. Awesome…it really didn't sit well with me that those three men would hold my life in their hands until, and here I quote those bloody contracts, 'a suitor releases me from their guardianship.'

Great…

So here I was.

Saying in as clear a voice as possible my oath, in front of quite an assembly I would say.

And I have to add I still hadn't had time to take a break, or a shower for that matter, since we arrived. Thorin had been adamant, I wouldn't be allowed further into his halls without the oath being spoken and the contract signed.

Troublesome but understandable I guessed.

"I, Thorin Oakenshield, son of Thráin, son of Thrór, Heir to Durin's line, accept your oath, your allegiance and your presence within my Halls. I accept to become your King and I swear to protect you as one of my people, from this day onwards until your death. You are now welcomed within my Halls."

Had Dori not prepared me psychologically, I swear I would have yelped and crawled backwards at what came next. I simply bit my lower lip and clenched my fist, trying my best not to squeak when I felt the tip of the sword swiftly pierce my skin just enough to draw a few visible drops of blood.

The king then brought his sword to his hand and pierced the pad of his left thumb. He then handed his sword in one graceful move to a younger blond man, who I had been told was his nephew and heir.

"From this day onwards until the end of your life, I accept your oath and bind it in the blood drawn willingly."

He then pressed his thumb under the small wound he had given me. During the whole time his eyes hadn't left mine. I swallowed when he extended his hand to help me stand. I was quickly facing the audience and King Thorin spoke what would be the final words of the ceremony.

"I present to you the Lady Amelia Stanson. She is now under the guardianship of Master Balin son of Fundin, and Master Dori son of Kori."

I jumped slightly at the sudden common shout of welcome that came from the small dozen of men around. Thorin glanced at me from the corner of his eyes and released my hand while Dori and his brothers were coming towards me.

"Who are these people?' I asked them in a whisper

-They are the heads of the major important families and clan. They were here to witness your oath and will now be able to communicate the King's words to their families and kin.

-Oh"

There was nothing else to say and I sighed, feeling all the exhaustion of the trip hitting me at once. I was starting to daydream about bed, possibly some food, and clear water to remove the blood from my skin. I wondered idly if I should fear an infection because seriously, who knows where this man's sword had been.

"Dori, when can we go to your place?' I didn't want to appear ungrateful, but I felt like falling asleep right there.

-We can go now actually. There is nothing else required from you tonight so I suggest we simply tell Thorin we'll be going."

I nodded, extremely relieved to hear that. Nori patted my shoulder while Ori was scribbling madly in his notebook; no doubt he was documenting everything that had just occurred.

"You did well,' Nori said simply to me.

As we were just a few feet away from the king, who was busy talking with Balin and the blond man, I whispered to Nori

"What shall I call him?"

Nori's right eyebrow quirked while he looked at me questioningly, I had to force my eyes away of the strangely interesting sight of his braided eyebrows going up in his hairline.

"The king, how should I call him' I pressed, shaking my head slightly.

-Thorin" A deep voice then answered me, forcing me to face the blue eyes that had been looking at me not too long ago.

"You don't need to use titles unless we're in a formal setting. Balin will explain you later.' He then proceeded to ignore me splendidly and turned to Dori. 'Dori we'll need to speak more about the new trade agreements, come to me tomorrow.

-Aye.

-And keep an eye on your human, I don't want her to wander around the forges and mines unaccompanied."

I was red with embarrassment at first when I had realized that he had heard my questions to Nori, but his last comments had me stunned. I had just taken an oath to him and he didn't trust me. Well I could agree that oath taking didn't mean much for me but still. Even though it was true that such habits were obsolete for me, I would still try and respect them here.

After all I didn't want to be left alone. Still he could have had the decency to trust me at least a bit. Besides, I wasn't a pet that the men would have to walk around with a leash. Who talked like that? Keep an eye on your human? Seriously? And anyway, why would I want to visit mines and forges? What was the point? And why did he specify those places? Were they really that important? I mean seriously, forges and mines, who in their right mind would want to go there?

In my mind, I was hissing and screeching quite loudly at such rude comments. I didn't say a word though, simply too scared to utter anything.

I was really glad when Nori and Ori guided me back through corridors, stairs and bridges but I was so tired I didn't bother looking around. We stopped in front of a small wooden door and Nori produced a gigantic key that was almost as long as my hand. He opened the door widely and made a flourish and a bow to gesture me in.

I rolled my eyes at his antics and entered the threshold gingerly, sincerely curious about seeing their house and not sure what to expect. The first thing I realized was that it was completely dark inside, which annoyed me slightly, especially when Nori snorted. The only light was coming in from the door in my back and the corridor's torches. I heard Nori and Ori rummaging behind me, they made some more noise before Nori lighted a candle and handed it to me.

The warm light allowed me to see that I was in a large room with a relatively low ceiling, even though I probably couldn't reach it even if I stretched, it was low compared to the height of the halls' ceilings anyway. There was a very large hearth on the wall at my right. I could see a large plush carpet on the floor and several comfortable looking chairs with big, plush cushions on each of them. There were some shelves on the far wall and a large wooden trunk not far from me at my left that was just next to a large wooden wardrobe. While I was scanning the room, Ori had been busy lighting some more candles and Nori was already pilling wood in the hearth and readying it to light a warm fire. Overall the room was dark but not gloomy and I found a very cosy quality to it.

Ori gestured for me to follow him and I saw a door on the left wall, which had been partly hidden by the wardrobe until then. There I entered in a large kitchen that obviously served as a dining room too. It was as big as the first room, with just a door on the far wall, next to a basin that served as a sink I guessed, and lots of cabinets, trunks and closets. There were huge cauldrons hanging here and there and what I believed to be dried plants too. A small door on the side opened on the cellar Ori told me.

I hadn't much time to look around as Ori guided me immediately in a corridor with several doors and pointed at each of them.

"Here's Dori's room and study. Then it's Nori's and then mine. Here we have a second cellar and then it's your new room. It's a bit dirty as we used it as storage and for friends. Tomorrow we'll have to put some order in there.' He explained while I followed him in and he continued 'You have some shutters that are closed right now, you'd be able to open them during the day if you wish."

I nodded absentmindedly, looking at what was to be my room. It was small. It was longer than it was large. There was enough space though, to have the bed at the far right corner, against the right wall and with a small bedside table next to it. There was an impressive mess of clothes and blankets on the bed as well as various unidentified objects on the floor and in the corners.

"We'll have enough space to put a trunk or a small wardrobe here' Ori said pointing at the foot of the bed 'and if you wish we can have a small study table and chair there, and we could add some shelves or cabinets too."

He seemed to pause and then blushed slightly.

"Well, you're a girl so…I guess you'd like to have a washbasin too. Mama used to have one in her room."

His cheeks were pink and he was fidgeting, avoiding my eyes. Ori really was a nice and considerate person. I smiled softly at him though he still refused to look at me.

I could imagine what the room might look like while he had successively pointed at the right corner of the room and then gestured at the walls. He had been looking at me with expectation shining in his eyes before becoming suddenly shy at the mention of the washbasin and his mother.

"It'll be perfect Ori." I reassured him.

To be honest it was small but I had the feeling that I could, with their help, transform it into some very cosy place. I heard steps behind me and turned to look at Nori and Dori

"So you like it then?' Dori asked

-Sure! After some small changes I bet it'd be the best around!" I was enthusiast about this whole topic and I let them witness it shamelessly.

Nori smirked and Dori smiled. They were both pleased to see me like this, I could easily tell as much. Meanwhile Ori had gathered the clothes that occupied the bed and quickly got out of the room. I became suddenly serious as I looked Dori in the eyes.

"I really ought to thank you. I understand what happened today was quite big, though I'm unsure why. You all did a lot to help me and I don't know if I could ever repay you for your help.

-You won't need to. We explained countless time already" Nori started to say while shaking his head.

I interrupted him, my voice calm and steady which surprised me.

"But you're wrong. I know you said that it was your responsibility to take care of me, but it's really not. It's not your fault I ended here and you could very well have let me in this first village we were in. Nothing forced you to take me in, but you chose to do it and for that I can't thank you enough."

I saw Dori attempting to cut in but I stopped him by raising my hand. I wanted to at least finish this.

"I don't know how or when or even if I'll be going back to my home. I might very well be stuck here, especially as no one can understand or explain where I come from and how to go from here to there. So what I'm trying to say is that, you taking me in, it is a big deal for me. So…thank you. I'll try my best not to shame you and not to bother you. I'll try to learn your ways and adapt…

-You don't have to forget who you are in order to live here. Thorin would not ask you to forget about your home. You are welcomed here and soon you'll feel better. Dwarves are not a very welcoming race, but when we swear to protect something or someone we mean it.' Dori finally managed to say.

-We promised you not to leave you alone, to protect you and to take you under our care. So we'll see to it that, if you can't find your way back home then you'll find a home within this realm.' Nori's words made tears well up in my eyes.

-And I wish to thank you for that."

The two men gathered me in their arms as I felt a few tears roll on my cheeks. They patted my back and told me not to worry. I was already calmer when Ori's voice came from the corridor.

"Can I come in with the clean blankets now?"

We all chuckled at hearing his muffled voice from behind a mountain of linens and blankets held in his arms.

That night I slept peacefully. My heart was still broken at the simple idea that I might never go home; but the words and promises of my new friends were like a calming balm on my pain.

* * *

The following morning I awoke to the clatter of plates and cutlery and laughing voices. I managed to light a candle with the little ember that Dori had put on mosses in a small metallic bowl on the bedside table. I quickly put on the dark green dress that Dori had bought and opened the door to my room a little. The volume of noise was surprising and I took a second to marvel at the fact that my room was almost soundproof.

I took a few tentative steps in the dark corridor, choosing to blow the light of my candle as the door to the kitchen was clearly visible and I left it on a small table which was already covered by countless unlit candles. I took a small peak in the room and marvelled for a minute that so few people could make so much noise.

I could easily recognize Dori, Nori and Ori among the group, but there were a few new faces. There was a man who was laughing loudly, leaning on the table to avoid falling from the wooden bench. He had dark braided hair and an impressive moustache. I could see the back of a massive ginger man sitting at the end of the table and with a plate full of various foods in front of him.

Then there was another ginger man, with an impressive beard that I had seen briefly the previous day, talking with the king. He was sitting, his arm thrown around the shoulder of the man next to him. That second man had dark brown hair and a small, finely braided beard that was decorated with beautiful beads.

Then there was a younger man, probably younger than Ori, who had a growing ginger beard and who was laughing with the first man I had observed.

"Ah, here she is!' Dori's voice suddenly said and I jumped slightly 'Come on in, Miss Amelia, come and have breakfast with us."

I pushed the door as the silence grew in the room. I felt strangely nervous to meet all these people. Yet I stepped in and joined the three brothers on the bench facing the one with all those new faces.

"Here is the Lady Amelia, who prefers to be called simply Amelia." Dori said while I sat.

I blushed under the gazes and cleared my throat before speaking.

"Hello, pleased to meet you all."

They seemed surprised by my greeting and it reminded me of the time I had met the three brothers. How long ago had that been? Barely two weeks? It felt like decades had passed since. Dori's voice stirred me from my thoughts and I listened to him.

"Amelia comes from a far away land and their customs are quite different from ours, or from the ones men around have."

They all nodded as if this simple sentence could explain the oddity that I, apparently, was. Then the first man I had seen winked at me and said

"I'm Bofur, and this' he pointed at the large man who hadn't stop eating 'is my brother Bombur, at your service."

Bombur gave me a warm smile before continuing to munch on a large piece of ham.

I nodded slightly at both of them when Ori asked me.

"Aren't you hungry? Do you want sausages for breakfast?

-What?' Nori interrupted 'You said there wasn't any sausage left." He pointed an accusing finger at his younger brother who didn't seem impressed.

"If I had cooked what we had left, you would have eaten all of them and Amelia wouldn't have the possibility to have some." Ori bluntly stated and I couldn't help but chuckle.

Bofur laughed heartily while the other ginger and the man next to him laughed too. Nori glared at his younger brother and I finally laughed loudly.

"It's fine Ori, I'll have some if there's enough for your guests and brother too.

-Don't worry about us Amelia' the man, Bofur, said. 'Ori just cook one for the lass."

It was obvious he had said that just to annoy Nori. Ori nodded and went to cook the meat while I winked at Nori. I don't know where it came from, but between the brothers' antics and Bofur's laugh, I simply felt good that morning. For the first time in what seemed an eternity, my home and family were far from my thoughts as I simply tried to enjoy the present moment.

The ginger man in front of me cleared his throat loudly and I looked at him when he bowed his head slightly.

"I'm Gloin, at your service.

-Pleased to meet you' I answered, bowing my head similarly to what he had done.

-This is my wife, Danà, and our son Gimli' He continued.

-Pleased to…wait what?"

My head, which was bowing already, snapped back up and I starred with eyes wide as saucers at the man or woman in front of me. He or she dared to wink playfully at me.

Thank god I hadn't offended them, I thought, struggling to close my mouth and gather my wits. Now that they had pointed it, I could see that her face was more finely defined than the others, her nose smaller, and her beard seemed thinner and softer too. Still, a bearded woman? Really?

They laughed cheerfully at my surprise and I quickly muttered an apology for being so openly rude.

"Don't worry lass' Bofur said 'It's quite rare that humans can discern between men and women in our race.

-Still, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to offend you.

-T'is fine missy. Don't worry." Her voice was a tone graver than I had expected, but it was still clearly a woman's voice.

"That's why some men believe dwarves are born from the mountain rocks' laughed Bofur.

-Dwarves" I repeated, still stunned.

Apparently my brain had decided now was a good time to finally pay attention to their weird comments. I think it was the bearded woman who finally convinced me to give a little credit to their talks and claims. They were all silent as I looked at each of them in turn, my gaze returning quickly to Danà though.

"You believe you're dwarves" I said in a whisper.

They stayed silent for a second before Dori spoke.

"It's because we are dwarves Amelia. We told you that already.

-I'm sorry I just thought… I mean you don't look like dwarves."

That stunned them and Nori was the first one to speak after that.

"What do you mean? What did you expect us to look like?

-I don't know. Shorter to begin with"

That made them laugh some more and Bofur exclaimed in between laughs

"Are you saying you think we're tall?

-Well, where I come from we call dwarves some humans who are really short. Being a dwarf is not, it's not a race and there are very few of them.' I hesitated, unimpressed by their laugh.

-Well I can assure you we're dwarves alright' Dori said, patting my hand.

-But then, those other things you said about elves being real, is it true too?"

That put a damper to their mood. They looked gloomy suddenly when Dori answered.

"Yes they exist, but we aren't really on friendly terms with them."

I nodded, understanding this was a topic for another time even though I had to admit I was curious. Would elves look like what I pictured or will they be something else entirely? Trying to forget about elves for now, accepting these people were dwarves was tough enough, I looked back at the little family in front of me and said the first thing that came to my mind.

"Then you all have beards, even children' I was astounded as I glanced to the round face of Gimli.

-I'm not a child' he protested before adding ' I'm 60 already".

Sweet mother of…What?!

I startled at this information so violently that I actually jerked and fell from the bench. Too stunned to actually register the pain coming from my back as Bofur booming laugh resonated in the room. Ori quickly came to help me sit up as I squeaked a little 'what?' Dori and Ori were patting my back, hovering over me worriedly when Nori finally decided to answer my question.

"Dwarves have a long life span. That's the reason why we're used to our humans' partners dying before us. T'is not because we kill them."

Had Nori been close enough, I'd have kicked him in the shin or slapped him to make his mocking smirk and playful glint in his eyes disappear. He had apparently a good memory and remembered clearly one of our earlier discussions.

They all laughed though I could feel they didn't mean it in a bad way for me. They were just amused at some of my words and I didn't think they were mocking my ignorance. My gaze turned toward Ori and I asked the question I had on my mind.

"But then, how old are you?"

Nori's smile softened, obviously remembering our little chat in the shop back in Beinne.

"I'm 93" Ori answered proudly, making my head spin.

I glanced toward Nori and he simply said

"144"

I couldn't believe it. One of my hands was now permanently fixed over my widely open mouth and I turned, disbelievingly toward Dori, the oldest brother.

"I am 162 my dear.

-Holy crap!"

I couldn't help it and my curse both surprised and amused the dwarves around.

"I can't believe it. It's impossible." I muttered while my brain was struggling to register all those information.

I suddenly had the urge to poke Dori in the shoulder to make sure he actually was alive. If elves and dwarves existed, why not ghosts too? Right? I resisted this urge though; I didn't want to offend anyone here.

I had huge difficulties to wrap my head around those facts. The worst part being that I realized how far I actually was from my home and its familiarity. I hadn't simply stepped into a sort of retarded part of the globe or not even into a time hole that had brought me back to medieval Europe.

Nope.

That would have been way too easy.

I was apparently in a whole other world.

"There, have some chamomile, it'll sooth you."

Dear, sweet Dori. I gave him a shaky smile when I took the warm cup from his hands. The silence was quickly broken by Danà who gently told me.

"Dori asked me whether I could show you around and help you adjust to life here. If you so wish we could go see the seamstresses so that you could buy proper clothes and then I'll show you to the market."

I nodded, smiling softly but not trusting my voice to speak yet. Though I did glance curiously at my clothes, wondering what was wrong with them again. She apparently understood my gesture and answered my unasked question

"Your clothes are fine, but obviously human made. It'll help you fit in to have clothes cut in our fashion. Your lack of beard will be quite the beacon to you being human already."

I looked at her with wide eyes and she laughed

"All dwarves women have beard Amelia, not just me.' I really was too astounded to even try to reply.

-After you're done adjusting to this place, in a few days maybe, I'll take you to meet my brother' Gloin said gruffly 'He's one of the few healers we have, he'll decide whether to take you as an apprentice or not after talking with you.

-Thank you' I answered after several minutes spent attempting to clear my throat 'I'm thankful for your help.

-Don't worry, it'll be in our interest to have another trained healer.

-Is it that rare? To be a healer I mean?' I asked turning instinctively towards Dori.

-Well, dwarves are miners, merchants, crafters, smiths. We like to build things with our hands and we have a close affinity to the earth and its jewels." He said calmly and seriously

"So you have few people bothering to learn how to heal, right?

-Yes. It is not usual for a dwarf to choose such a career.

-Then I'll have to do my best to be useful." I simply said while munching on some bread.

I realized then that there was a sausage in front of me and I hadn't even seen Ori come back with it. I smiled to him while I happily ate the meat, playfully glancing at Nori who glared at me. I swear his love for sausages was disturbing.

I laughed softly, silently thanking him for making me laugh when I really felt shell shocked and slightly down, and cut the remaining part of the meat in two. Then I simply took the untouched part and put in his plate.

A very heavy silence fell. Even Bombur had stopped to eat and was staring at me. Glancing towards Nori I saw his cheeks slightly starting to redden.

"What? What have I done now?" I asked nervously.

Was it considered rude to give a bit of your own food to someone else? Had I done something potentially offending? Way to go Amelia. First day in your new place and you're already the oddball who offends everyone, I admonished myself.

Dori cleared his throat quite loudly and reassured me.

"Nothing. It's nothing don't worry."

But this time I wasn't buying it. I looked at Bofur's cheeky grin, Danà and Gloin's surprised yet highly amused faces and Ori's red face while he was avoiding looking at his brother. I turned toward Dori and narrowed my eyes at him.

"Alright, what is it? Last time already he reacted like this. What have I done?'

I heard Nori choke and cough loudly behind me when various voices spoke at the same time.

"Last time? What last time?' Bofur asked leaning on the table, his eyes twinkling with mirth.

-You really haven't done anything bad.' Dori repeated before Danà interjected.

-You're not helping her Dori. What if she does the same in front of someone else? Or worse, does it to someone unaware of her situation?"

Nori's coughing fit redoubled and Ori was impossibly red while Bofur laughed loudly and Dori sputtered an incomprehensible answer. I was stunned by their reaction and turned my gaze to Danà. I could have bet she was my best shot at understanding the situation. The men were obviously too shocked by whatever had happened.

"What did you mean by last time?' Bofur insisted

-Don't answer that!" Nori squeaked between two coughs.

Unfortunately I had already opened my mouth and the words were flowing out before my brain registered his warning.

"I asked him to braid my hair and he point blank refused even after I insisted."

There was a short silence before Bofur, Bombur and Gloin exploded in fits of uncontrollable laughter. Danà was eyeing Dori with a 'See, I told you so' look on her face while Dori was apparently deeply embarrassed. His embarrassment was nothing though compared to his brothers'.

Ori's face was purple. How could someone really turn purple? I quickly shoved a glass of cool water in front of him and encouraged him to drink it while glancing at Nori. Nori was avoiding looking at me and was almost as red as his younger brother had been minutes before. He wasn't coughing anymore though, which I wasn't sure was a good sign or not. Was he still breathing?

I waved my hand in front of him and he pushed me away, not even looking at me. I frowned. I would have lied if I said it hadn't hurt me to see him reject me and my concern like he had just done.

This situation was starting to piss me off.

Ori wouldn't look at me. Nori was apparently angry at me. Dori was speechless and that stupid Bofur was still laughing. At least Bombur and Gloin had calmed down a bit. Right now, Bofur's laugh wasn't cheering me. I wanted him to shut up so that someone, probably Danà, could explain to me what was happening.

I glared at the laughing dwarf, making him laugh some more.

That was it.

I had been patient enough. I grabbed back the glass of water I had put in front of Ori and that had been left untouched and swiftly threw the whole content to the dwarf face.

"Shut up, will you?" I snapped.

Well that did it. I believe he was so shocked by my reaction that it killed his laugh immediately. Ignoring his wide, surprised eyes, I turned to Danà and calmly asked her.

"Please, what is it?"

She didn't wait a second before answering.

"Well you just told him you'd be agreeable to his courtship and the braid was just you asking him plainly to court you."

What?

"I'm sorry. Courtship? What?

-You asked him to marry you. Sharing his favourite meal is an old way to confess your interest. Asking a man to braid your hair is like asking him to marry you.' Bofur's good mood had apparently survived the water.

-I…' I turned towards Nori with wide eyes. 'I proposed to you? Twice?!" I shrieked.

Looking at all their faces I could see they weren't joking, even though that damn smirk was still in place on Bofur's face.

An awful wave of dread, shame and embarrassment overpowered me and I couldn't stand being in this room any longer. I quickly and swiftly stood up and rushed back to my room, closing the door behind me and praying for the earth to open beneath my feet and swallow me.

I leaned on the door with my back and hit the wood repeatedly with my head, cursing myself, dwarves and their stupid customs.

I sighed and went to sit on my bed, pulling my knees to my chest and my arms around my legs. I let my head fall on my knees, closing my eyes.

For a short while I had been happy and had forgotten my situation, but it had all came back to hit me in the face. I had made a fool of myself without even knowing it. In some rational part of my mind I knew I was probably overreacting but another, prominent part was whispering incessantly in my ears.

I had realized in the short time I had been with them that the brothers had a very different sense of propriety than mine. Apparently it was the case for their whole culture, seeing as how they still used and believed in obsolete concept akin to middle aged chivalry, with all their honour oaths and blood willingly drawn or whatever.

I couldn't be certain, but I was almost positive that asking a man to marry you after having met him three days before was not considered proper in this place. Furthermore I had said that loudly to everyone and I had apparently even confessed some inexistent feelings in front of his friends and family.

I was extremely shy when it came to such matters and I was an ardent believer in the concept of privacy. Knowing the meaning of what I had said and done was a terrible blow to my pride and personal beliefs. I had put myself on display without even knowing it.

Shameful wasn't even close to describe how I felt.

I whimpered feeling tears burning my eyes.

I wanted to go home more than ever. I could never face those people ever again and I had nowhere to go. With a groan I suddenly realized that I even had thrown a glass of water at the face of someone I had just met.

I started to mentally kick myself, thinking about how I could possibly sneak away from this place, definitely. I was clearly overreacting, but at that precise moment I wasn't really in control of my mind and actions anymore.

I sniffed, ashamed at my own reaction when I felt tears slowly falling on my hidden cheeks.

Why, oh why was I such a cry-baby? I hadn't cried once during all the difficulties I faced in my studies. I didn't cry because of my loneliness during my years at school and uni. I hadn't even cried when I learn of my failure in those last exams.

I hated feeling so weak, but I couldn't seem to control my feelings properly since I had put a step in this blasted land.

I was just about to stand up and prepare a backpack to leave, already planning to wait for the cover of the night. My heart hurt thinking of abandoning the three brothers so ungratefully after all they'd done for me.

My brain and heart were fighting a raging, silent battle and were leaving me quite befuddled and hesitant.

Then I heard a strong, confident knock on my door. I startled, looking and feeling aghast as it slowly opened with a low creak.

* * *

**A/N: You can't believe how happy I was to see that some people enjoy this story as much as I do. So HUGE thanks to everyone one who reviewed/favorited/followed. Really thank you for your support.**

**Now, I know the brothers' age isn't specified, yet i'm going a bit AU here, especially for Ori, because the only thing we know about their age is that they're 50 years older than Fili and Kili. Well, sorry to anyone who is offended by Non-Cannon but well...I guess this whole story is AU anyway so...**

**The oath was partially inspired by a British oath of Allegiance. **

**That aside I hope you all enjoyed this chapter. I only posted it because all the reviews made me so happy that writing was fairly easy today. :) Thus the update earlier than I expected. **

**Once again, give me a few days maximum to update the next chapter, if I'm motivated though, I might post it tomorrow. **


	5. The Dwarves' Market

**I'm repeating myself, but I don't own anything except for my OC and the plot.**

* * *

I didn't know what I expected when the door opened, but it certainly wasn't Danà. Though I had to admit I was glad it was her and not one of the other dwarves. I could see her smile warmly at me when she entered without waiting for me to invite her in.

She closed the door behind her and silently came to sit beside me. She looked at me, appraising me and she nodded to herself.

"No need to go and hide, like a rabbit in its hole. You shouldn't be ashamed. The men are always stupid about those topics. It's entirely Nori's and his brothers' fault.

-What? No, it was me…' I tried to defend them before she stopped me.

-You behaved normally according to your own traditions. Had Nori explained to you that first time what you had done, it wouldn't have blown in his face today.

-I'm sorry I shamed him' I whispered, hiding my face once again.

-For Mahal's sake girl, it wasn't your fault. It isn't a big deal anyway. Wait, listen to me. It is not a big deal because it happened here and between close friends. Bofur and Bombur have known Nori for decades. I can still remember them all playing in the dirt together."

I tried to imagine Bofur, Bombur and Nori as children running around; did they already have those hairdos? The picture of a small Nori with a starfish hairdo forced a smile out of me, but unfortunately Danà's voice brought me back from my reveries.

"And my mother married their uncle. We are kin, cousins, I have known Dori since we were children and he came to visit us.

-But Bofur…' frowned, still somewhat disturbed by the man's, well dwarf's, laugh.

-What about him?

-Well, he did laugh quite a lot' I averted my gaze, looking anywhere but at her.

-Bofur is one of the nicest dwarves I know, but he's an idiot. He didn't laugh to mock you, but Nori has been swearing for as long as I've known him that he would never bother to marry anyone. Surely you can see the irony of the situation in our eyes."

Danà was gently patting my knee while telling me all this. I looked at her with wide eyes, suddenly more curious to learn about their lives than to worry about my actions. I still had unanswered questions though, and I really didn't want to be so ashamed in the future.

"Danà, I don't get it. How is it that me simply giving food to Nori is like…' I blushed a bit, I couldn't help it. 'Is like…like writing a love letter?

-Hmm, it's not really sharing the food, more the way you did it.' She replied simply.

-I don't get it.

-Well. Simply put, you ate a bit of it before cutting it in perfect halves. Then you offered the untouched half to Nori discreetly and put it directly in his plate, in front of him. You didn't throw it, you didn't joke or yell or anything. You did it calmly and inconspicuously."

Alright, so I didn't throw my food at people's face, big deal. Honestly, what decent person would throw food across a table? Except maybe teens in school during food battles and I always ran away during the few times it occurred. Seeing that I remained silent, Danà continued her explanation.

"Dwarves are, by nature, loud, except in few occurrences. The fact that you did share your food in such a way is considered in our older traditions as a way to share your feelings, love usually.

-So next time I can't finish my plate I just throw it to his face?" I deadpanned.

Danà roared with laughter and took some time before answering between two chuckles.

"No, just tell loudly around that you don't want it anymore, trust me, in a matter of seconds it'd be gone. Or you might just let him steal it…"

I chose not to answer. I was contemplating those peoples' weird traditions when another thought was brought back to the forefront of my mind.

"He's so old and hasn't ever wished to marry?"

Danà laughed once again and started to caress her beard pensively.

"He's not that old considering our life span.' She said jokingly before becoming suddenly more serious 'You know these three boys never have had to deal with a woman besides their Ma. Poor woman died awhile ago now. I think it'll do them good to have you here. You might actually be able to put some sense in their heads.

-I don't think I'll ever be able to face Nori' I muttered forlornly

-Oh, stop it already. You live among dwarves now, so act the part. We are blunt and honest folks. If you do something wrong, you apologize and eventually repay the debts. You did nothing wrong, you don't have to worry." She said in a stern voice.

I couldn't help but nod at her, a tiny bit afraid of what she'd do if I were to disagree with her. It didn't register in my mind that she hadn't really answered the question I had asked.

"Besides, I already admonished these idiots for making you run away to your room. I'd wager you were even ready to run away with your few belongings, weren't you? You're a sensitive little thing…"

My silence apparently spoke volume to her and she sighed before giving a sharp slap on my thigh.

"Listen Missy, you have to toughen up. Dwarves are a merry folk, but we tend to be blunt. If you run away at every difficulty you encounter…

-It's not that…Danà, it's not like that.

-Then what is it?

-It's just.' I hesitated and bit my lower lip.

-Come girl, out with it. I won't bite you and it might help me if you explain yourself a bit.' She was so sweet, so motherly at that moment that I felt confident I could speak to her.

-I'm not used to people laughing with me. Usually they laugh at me and my first reaction has always been to turn around and avoid them. Avoid the confrontation." I whispered shamefully.

Danà simply hummed and played absentmindedly with one of her beads. She didn't speak for several long minutes and I wondered what she was thinking of me.

"Come girl, it's time for you to show you deserve your place among us."

I looked at her questioningly and felt slightly reassured by her soft motherly smile.

"Dwarves don't run away from a fight. Come, stand up proudly, square your shoulders. You have it in you, I know it. Now, I said it'd do them good to have you, but I believe you'll learn quite a few things from them too."

I wondered how she could be so confident about my so called qualities, when I had always been doubtful and highly critical with myself. I seriously doubted I had anything in me but chose to stay silent. I was mortified when she added.

"Oh, by the way, I loved how you shut Bofur's bloody mouth. I'll use this method more often from now on. Very easy and efficient.

-Oh my god' Right now I hated her for reminding me 'Have I offended him?"

To my utter surprise she snorted

"Offended? The idiot will only love you more if you stand up to him. I told you, dwarves appreciate courage, wit and bluntness, and we see them as qualities. Thank Mahal we aren't elves who speak riddles and answer a question by yes and no both."

While she continued to speak, she had guided me through the door and corridor back to the kitchen, which was now empty. I didn't have time to ask where they had all disappeared for Danà answered directly.

"I sent those idiots out to work. They were incredibly stupid and managed to make you feel bad in less than an hour. Trust me, they got an earful. Well, I was thinking to go see the seamstresses now. Feel like it?"

I felt a bubble of warmth spread in my heart for this woman who was so strange yet so helpful and kind to me.

"Thanks Danà, that'll be great.

-Come then, we have a lot to do."

* * *

If I had to use just one word to express how Danà was, I'd say intense. That woman was always doing, saying, thinking something. It was impressive how she managed to know before me what I hadn't realized I was thinking. It was quite disorientating actually.

She was a really nice person and had this sort of no-nonsense mind that was both scary and amazing. She could put someone back in his place with a few sharp words and be all motherly with me the next second.

The best example being when we were at the seamstresses' quarters; we entered the large room and were saluted by three women, all bearded I wish to highlight. They smiled warmly to Danà but eyed me strangely. Immediately they started to whisper in an unknown language and I had this strange hunch that my lack of beard will easily be noticed.

Yep, it apparently was quite the oddity in the halls.

The seamstresses though didn't comment much and smiled warmly at me when we explained I'd need several sets of dresses. The real troubles started when two younger women with sumptuous dresses and jewels came in, still bearded I insist to note. One of them had really pretty black hair while the second was a ginger head. As soon as they saw me they looked down their nose at me and started to whisper unintelligible words.

Well I thought they were unintelligible, but I found out quickly that I was the only who couldn't hear and understand what they were saying. Apparently dwarves have some sort of super-hearing capacities. Lucky them.

I could see the seamstresses shift uneasily behind me and Danà, who had been in the back checking some newly arrived fabric came back next to me. She quickly assessed the situation and heard what the women were still whispering. She snapped, startling me at the same occasion.

"Being rude to the King's guest and Masters Balin and Dori's ward is not appropriate behaviour."

The two women sneered and turned away, before exiting, the ginger turned to glare at me

"Thorin is wrong to accept such vermin in our halls. Humans are filthy."

Then she left not bothering to listen to Danà's reply.

"Wow, who was this charming person?' I asked the older woman

-No one you should bother with. She's visiting from the Iron Hills; they're a bit... special there. She comes from a powerful clan, is young and stupid."

I shrugged, not too bothered about this kind of talks. Well, racism, intolerance and the stupidity that came with ignorance obviously existed everywhere. I had experienced such things before, though for entirely different reasons, and sadly enough I was slightly used to it. A few particularly bad memories crossed my mind but I swiftly turned my thoughts to other topics. As I stood with my arms extended at each of my sides to let the seamstress take measures, I asked Danà something that had been on my mind since the previous day.

"Isn't it strange for everyone to call the King by his name, without title?"

Danà grimaced and the women around pulled faces as well.

"I'm sorry, did I say something wrong?

-No, it's just linked to a dark part of our past. We don't like to talk much about it, but if you are to stay here, you should know."

She then went on narrating the story of their once great kingdom, Erebor, the awful attack by a terrifying dragon, Smaug the Terrible and the dramatic story of their royals dying one after another. King Thorin was a king without a kingdom it seemed.

At the end of her tale I felt incredibly sad, as if it had actually happened to me or people I cared about. I guessed in a way it had hurt people I was starting to care for.

"T'is why Thorin do not wish to be called King. He works daily in the forges, he's a great smith, but he's still our king and has to act as such too. He's our leader. He's the one who helped us, guided us here and gave us another mountain to call home, though the olders among us still recall Erebor."

I nodded gravely. I didn't feel pity, just sorrow for their fate. I cleared my throat.

"Have you seen it? Erebor?"

Her eyes came to look at me and I could see the deep sorrow in them. I could honestly say, I had never witnessed such pain and longing in a person's eyes before. I didn't want to ask her more details and changed back to what the topic was at first.

"So King Thorin doesn't wish to be called King unless in special ceremonies?

-Yes. You know, some humans used to mock him, calling him the Homeless King, the Crownless King, the Beggar King. At the time we were so poor that even he had to slave away in those men towns. He worked in their forges, earning barely enough to feed his own kin. We were all struggling.' She shook her head forlornly. 'Those were dark times."

I didn't want to speak some meaningless words so I kept silent. Soon the women around started to talk once more about fashion and I discussed with them the possibility to have them sew a long tunic that'll reach my knees that I could wear with breeches without shocking any sensitivities around. They seemed enthusiastic at the idea and promised to have everything ready for later in the week.

Then, as she had promised, Danà showed me around and I could for the first time actually observe the Halls.

They were breathtaking and even if Danà swore they were nothing compared to the greatness of Erebor or Khazad-dûm, I couldn't believe her. Every stone was carved, polished, engraved, and finely chiselled. The ceilings were high and there were many floors, linked together with large bridges or footbridges and massive staircases. The blue coloured stones were decorated with gold and silver and tall statues, they mostly were twice my size, guarded some of the stairs and corridors.

Natural light came through holes high in the ceilings and walls but most of the light came from candles and torches. Each flicker of light illuminated the words and symbols set and engraved in the stones, some even seemed to have been painted with gold and silver.

She showed me around the halls guiding me to the places I could need in the future, the first one being the public bath and an area where I'd be able to wash clothes. I had been astounded by the large hearth used to heat water contained in huge copper basins. Smaller tubes would then bring the water into separate bathtubs that were hidden behind screens to afford some semblance of privacy.

At that moment I could honestly say I loved the dwarves.

These people had taken the time to actually invent heaters and pipes. I could have cried with joy.

I used my time with Danà to ask her about the question that had been bugging me for awhile about the water and where it came from. I then found out that there was an underground river whence water was collected and distributed through a complex system of copper tube and basins. Besides, she added, rain water was collected as well through an intricate system of holes and tunnels dug into the mountain side.

I was flabbergasted to say the least and soon my head was spinning because of technical and mechanical words that she flung at me.

When she showed me the end of one of those inventions they used, it reminded me of one of Da Vinci's; it was basically a tube which encased a long piece of wood that had been carved like a screw. By making the wood inside spin, the water at the bottom would come up almost effortlessly, following the path made by the carvings.

It was pure genius.

Now I understood how the three brother's house could have water accessible in their kitchen and how the public washbasin and baths worked.

Danà told me though that not all dwarves had access to water in their own apartments. Dori, Nori and Ori were apparently lucky enough to have come from a relatively respectful and rich family. Or rich at least before the fall of Erebor, she whispered lastly.

I walked all day long with Danà, exploring the halls. I had never seen such architecture and it was impressive. Thinking about the obvious ingenuity of the dwarves I was properly astonished. Though, each time I wondered at the size of the halls, the beauty of the carvings or anything really, Danà would give me a patronizing look and would gently explained it wasn't actually anything grand at all.

I couldn't believe her. She was actually telling me they lived in the equivalent of a barn. It made me laugh and she agreed she might be exaggerating but I could feel she still believed it not to be anything special.

We agreed to disagree.

Then she brought me to the market which was in the first large hall, at the very entrance of the whole underground city. I was impressed by the number of stands and listened distractedly as Danà explained that only dwarves were allowed to sell their products here and that it was frowned upon, though allowed, for men to come shop here. More often than not though, the humans who dared to come up to this market stayed at the few first stalls at the entrance and didn't dare go further in.

Dwarves and men lived close by and needed each other for trade purpose but that didn't mean they had to appreciate to mingle together.

Danà was explaining that it hadn't always been like this, and that once men from a city called Dale were friendly with the dwarves of Erebor, but I honestly didn't pay much attention.

I was too occupied looking around like a child discovering a toy factory at Christmas.

There were the usual stands selling food, mostly meat I noticed, and some selling other 'daily products' such as quills, ink, and parchments. But I was delighted to find various stands covered with music instruments, there even was one selling instruments made in what I believed was silver.

There were lots of items made of leather too and Danà helped me to choose fitting shoes and boots. They were surprisingly far more comfortable than my current trainers and I quickly stepped into the new comfy ones, agreeing with Danà that I didn't need the boots yet for it was still summer.

Passing next to one of the few vegetables stands I could see, I came to a stop.

"Danà, wait. I'd like to buy some things here.

-Vegetables?' she looked a tad surprised.

-Well, yeah. In my contract, it's written I'll be responsible for grocery shopping. I thought it was a good time now to start doing it. Besides, I could cook dinner tonight as an apology to them.

-And you want to cook vegetables?" She looked amused now.

Choosing to ignore her Cheshire cat smile I turned to the elderly dwarf who waited patiently for us to purchase anything. And obviously, now was as good a moment as any to get embarrassed once more…

I had spotted very tasty looking tomatoes, but couldn't quite reach them across the large stall's table and the dwarf smiled warmly and handed them to me.

I replied automatically, politeness being ingrained in my brain by years of listening to my aunt's rant. I could almost hear her voice in my head 'always say thank you, it doesn't cost anything and it makes everyone's day brighter.'

So here I was, smiling back at the dwarf and opening my mouth.

"Thanks a lot sir…Ma'am, sir…hem.' My eyes widened at the old bearded face and I started to stammer.' I'm sorry, I, oh dear..."

How can you tell someone politely; 'are you a man or a woman?' I'm sure my aunt would have known. I didn't.

To my utter mortification, Danà and the dwarf both laughed heartily. I felt a terrible blush crept on my cheeks.

"T'is alright, missy. I'm a woman."

Oh, the shame.

Obviously the joyous laughs had caught the attention of several dwarves around and they were soon circling us, smiling and apparently understanding easily what this was all about. Though I noticed most of them were first curious as to why I was here.

Danà stepped up to explain the situation.

"Hear everyone. This is Lady Amelia. She's Masters Balin and Dori's ward."

There was a collective murmur of understanding and then Danà just went back to my stupid mistake.

"It's easy to discern if you're facing a man or a woman.

-How so?' I squeaked, bright red when I heard some soft chuckles

-Look at the beards missy, if not the clothes.' The old vegetables' merchant told me.

-Woman's beards are usually more decorated, with many beads made of precious stones or metals. They're thinner too.' Danà started to explain.

-The clothes, woman wear dresses.' One of the dwarves around said.

-Look at the curves!'

-She can't look at the curves, what if the woman is wearing a coat.' A third scoffed.

-Check the bones! The bone structure is different' Another added.

-How can one look at bones? Never heard anything more stupid…"

Soon, my head was spinning with all the comments and advices coming from everywhere around me. There was some heated discussion before long between several dwarves about whether a dwarf woman could be recognized at the type of braid she wore. Even the merchants from the nearby stalls joined us in this entirely too weird discussion.

The worst, and funniest I have to admit, part came when they all circled me and decided I just needed practice.

So here I was, tomatoes in hands, looking at each dwarf and having to say whether I thought him or her to be male or female. Each time I made a mistake, they'd laugh good-heartedly. Each time I didn't, they'd cheer loudly.

I was still blushing at the end of it, but I had a wide smile on my face. Instead of being offended by my mistakes, these people were laughing them off. At that moment I finally started to understand what Danà had meant earlier. Dwarves were merry people who greatly enjoyed having fun and laughing.

I hadn't felt as if they were mocking me for my mistakes, not even for a second. If anything, they would tease each others, joking about that dwarf man whose beard did look like a woman's or this dwarf woman whose belly did hide every curve.

After awhile I had realized that my embarrassment had turned into entertainment.

I was already starting to like it here.

* * *

In the end I did manage to shop for food and I was finally ready to leave with salads and fresh tomatoes that I was planning to prepare as a side dish. I also intended to prepare some cabbages, eggplants and mushrooms, knowing they'd do perfectly to cook one of my aunt's favourite vegan's recipes.

All the while, Danà hadn't stopped smiling. When came the time to pay though, I felt completely embarrassed to realize I didn't have any money.

"Oh, I guess I should just forget it and give it all back.' I whispered to myself sadly.

-What? Why have you changed your mind?' Danà asked me

-I don't have money.

-What? Of course you have. Silly me. Here's the money Dori gave me in case you wanted to buy anything."

She handed me a small coin purse and I smiled widely, paying the elder dwarf. I asked Danà what time it was and we both realized with surprise that our little 'guess who's what' game had taken more time than we thought. I smiled warmly at the merchants I had met before rushing back to the brothers' house.

* * *

I had been happy to discover the house was empty when I arrived. I really wanted to surprise them. Danà had stayed, obviously enjoying some private joke I didn't understand. I didn't bother asking her though, I was already glad that she helped me to familiarize myself with the wooden stove.

I had to light a fire in a compartment on the left part of the metallic stove. The metal would then heat naturally because of the fire and then allow me to cook on top of it or in a small oven, which was actually a second small compartment just next to the one with the fire.

Soon I was happily preparing the food and Danà left me alone to my cooking. Before she went back to her place though, she promised to come back the following day to show me the other part of the market among other places.

"I can already tell you'd be a good addition in these dwarves' life.' She said from the threshold. 'I'm sure your food will be wonderful, it smells great. Don't let them tell you otherwise."

After these few optimistic words, she closed the door and I finished preparing dinner. I had used eggplants, cheese and mushrooms to make a stuffing for the cabbage I had then put in the oven. The salads and tomatoes were cut with some more cheese and I was about to prepare some garlic bread when the door opened.

"What is this smell?' I recognized Ori's voice.

-I'm not sure…' Dori seemed worried.

-Surprise!" I exclaimed as they came in the kitchen.

They stopped and I could clearly see they were astonished to see me next to the stove.

"I prepared dinner…I hope you'll like it, you just have to sit, it's almost ready!" I tried my best to hide my anxiety; I really hoped they would appreciate my initiative.

Somehow I hadn't expected them to look quite so happy. Dori and Ori smiled warmly at me, Ori seemed particularly cheerful.

Nori had this small, half grin, which, mixed with the light twinkle in his eyes, gave him a real roguish expression. My smile grew larger at seeing him look happily at me. I hadn't known until that moment, but I really was glad he wasn't angry at me for that morning's misunderstandings.

Nori and Ori quickly crossed the room and were about to sit when Dori, who was already washing his hands in the small basin, chastised them.

"Oy lads. Come and wash up."

Nori rolled his eyes and Ori sighed, but I had to fight an amused chuckle when I saw them both obey their older brother. One was almost a hundred years old, the other older even and they still obeyed like mere children. Who would have thought?

Ten minutes later, their hands were clean and they all sat, cutlery ready to dive in what I was about to bring on the table. I started with the pot containing the stuffed cabbage.

"I'll serve my dear." Dori offered while I went to grab the large bowl of salad and the plate of garlic bread.

When everyone was served I looked anxiously at them, waiting to know what they thought about my cooking before trying it myself. Their surprised, befuddled even, faces worried me.

"What is it?' Dori diplomatically asked me with an obviously forced smile.

-Stuffed cabbage.

-Oh, the meat is hidden inside then?' Ori looked relieved while Nori gingerly poked at the food in his plate, looking unconvinced and even suspicious with what he saw.

-No' I answered slowly 'There's no meat. I thought to try this special recipe. It's only vegetables and cheese."

I swear I could see the blood drain from their faces.

Well, Dori and Nori not so much, they just paled slightly, but Ori looked actually scared by the dish I had prepared. The young dwarf even seemed to recoil from his plate.

"You…you don't like it?' I asked worriedly 'You don't want to try it?

-Of…of course we'll try it!" Nori exclaimed after hearing my defeated tone.

He then proceeded to stuff his mouth with the food, looking both sad and surprised. I really didn't know what to make of such a combination of feelings.

"It's…weird' he said, then looking at my face quickly added 'but good weird. Really good weird!"

Dori tried with more reserve but after a few mouthfuls nodded sympathetically.

"It's…different. But it's not bad."

I turned to Ori who was still as white as a paper sheet.

"Ori, try it. Come on lad, just a mouthful.'

-I'm not sure…it's, it's green Dori."

I heard his whisper and was astounded. Now that I took the time to think about it though, I realized I hadn't seen them eat many vegetables, and those had been mostly potatoes, or heavily surrounded by meat. Maybe a vegan dinner wasn't something they'd enjoy.

Then I finally realized why Danà had smiled all day long and sighed.

"I'll go prepare some bacon and eggs if you want Ori. I'm sure there's still some ham in the cellar too.

-Hem…"

Dori and Nori glared at their younger brother and I smiled, though if I were entirely honest I felt a bit disappointed.

"Don't worry; I hadn't realized you didn't eat many vegetables."

I stood up and I could hear Dori whispering in this foreign language I heard everywhere in the halls. I prepared bacon and eggs for the three of them, served them and then sat, finally enjoying my meal.

Looking at the leftovers, my heart was warmed and I smiled gratefully at Nori who had made the effort to finish all the vegetables he had been given.

Just before retiring to bed that night though, I decided to speak my mind.

"I understand you're not used to vegetables. But as I'm supposed to take care of grocery shopping, let me tell you it's about to change. You'll have to eat more of them, it's healthier.' I tried my best to sound like my aunt, stern but nice, with my hands resting on my hips.

-What?' Ori looked desperate.

-At least five of them…' I tried to bargain.

-Per day?!' They all looked bewildered, even Nori.

-Alright, alright. Five per week would be a good start already." I chuckled and left the astounded dwarves behind me.

* * *

The night had fallen and though everything around was peaceful and quiet, I strangely couldn't sleep.

All the events of that day were turning around in my head and now that I was lying down in my room I took the time to think calmly about that busy day.

I had realized already how my reaction this morning had been disproportioned. I still couldn't explain why I had been so frightened by this misunderstanding. In all honesty I shouldn't have. The only thing I knew for sure was that I had really wanted to make a good impression on all these men, hem… dwarves. I wanted to prove to them and to myself even more, that I could fit here.

What other option did I have anyway besides trying to fit as best as I could?

Now that my heart and mind were at peace in the silence of the night I realized that, instead of freaking out, I should simply try hard, harder than I ever had, and do my best to become someone decent here.

I had always been slightly isolated. Part of my isolation was entirely due to me, and the other part of it was due to my sad past. It had always been normal for me, if hurtful, to be an outsider. I had friends, like everyone, but it had taken me years to understand that our friendship was due to the fact that neither of us wanted to be alone. This love-hate relationship I had in school was in reality only hate and fear; fear to be lonely, fear to be too different.

Then in uni…no that wasn't something I wanted to think about right now. Some stories are best left alone. I didn't want to feel depressed. Not now.

I had so far met some pretty nice and impressive people. They seemed so different from anyone I had known before. And here I wasn't talking about the whole medieval-like time thing.

Just their behaviours, the way their minds worked, everything was both familiar and utterly different. In a way I had to admit it really felt like I had just gone back in time.

There was an air of nobility and dignity in these peoples; the way they had proudly explained the difference in their beards for example was awe inspiring. The simplest of thing could become of the outmost importance for them. They knew the meaning of honour and were proud.

How Danà and the seamstresses had looked when they had explained the story of Erebor had shown me these qualities. I had felt somehow privileged and somehow like an intruder when they let me witness the intense pain and sheer pride in their eyes when they talked about the King and his past, their past.

There was an archaic air of chivalry, honour and an obvious strength in these people. Well, archaic for me at least. Somehow I was starting to wonder whether those strange qualities would not actually be easier for me to adapt to.

Here I had a chance to become a healer, to let my dreams come true. Here I had a chance to grow out of my shy and self deprecating shell. I had actually been encouraged strongly by Danà to let my voice be heard more often. Here I had a chance to become someone, to become a member of a group, a society.

Who knows, I might as well try and become as good a dwarf as humanly possible.

I snorted slightly to myself.

How did one become a dwarf anyway?

* * *

**A/N: I really wish to thanks everyone for their support. The reviews/favorites/follows are really cheering me up each time I receive a little mail signalling them. Thank you all, so so so so much for your support. I really didn't expect Nori would be so popular.**

**About this chapter, obviously I took liberties here. As far as I know there isn't much in the story to describe the dwarves halls. I just thought, if they live in mountains, surely it wouldn't be too far-fetched to believe they wouldn't have to go out with buckets to find water, right? So here come pipes (their abilities with metal are supposed to be unequaled, so why not?) and DaVinci's invention (which is true by the way, though I'm not sure I managed to explain it properly...if not, please do say so, I'll try and rewrite that part).**

**Other than that I hope you enjoyed this chapter as much as I enjoyed writing it :)**

**The next one will either be updated tomorrow or the day after at the latest (Saturday evening).**

**Thanks everyone for your support! It really means a lot!**


	6. Meet the Humans

**Everything belong's to JRR Tolkien, except for my OC and the plot**

* * *

When morning came, I felt refreshed and oddly at ease. My mind was entirely at peace and an unusual feeling of optimism was making me cheerful.

I made my way to the kitchen, noticing it was entirely too silent for many dwarves to be there. When I pushed the door, I wasn't surprised at all to only find Ori. He looked up at me from his seat at the table when I came in and we greeted each other warmly.

"Are Dori and Nori at work already?' I asked while taking a seat which faced Ori.

-Dori is."

I quirked an eyebrow at his answer and kept observing him while helping myself to a healthy serving of bread, cheese, butter and honey. Ori looked sad, though he hid it well.

"And where is Nori?' I asked softly, sensing there was some issue there.

-Nori is…Nori is out."

That stunned me. Both the answer and the utterly defeated way Ori spoke were unexpected and took me by surprise.

"Where is he?' I couldn't help but ask.

-Who knows. Nori always.' Ori sighed deeply before continuing 'He's always coming and going as he pleases. It's always been like this since our mother's death."

I felt my heart clench at the look of helplessness Ori was displaying. I didn't like to see him like this. Still I could understand a part of his feelings; I had lost my parents too, even though I had been quite young back then. Danà had told me about their mother's death, and it wasn't difficult to guess that their father was probably dead too, otherwise he'd be around surely.

I cleared my throat and softly spoke words I knew wouldn't help, but that I still felt were true.

"I'm sorry for your mother."

Ori took several minutes to answer. The mood was definitely not cheery that morning.

"Our mother, she was a strong dwarf. She used to whack Nori behind the head when he was being too cheeky. She would pull on Dori's ear when she told him off.' Ori chuckled at that and I followed him.

-Are you telling me Dori would be scolded? I can't believe that.' I smiled warmly at Ori who mirrored it with a huge toothy grin.

-Aye, it's hard to imagine, right?"

We laughed softly together before Ori started to tell me some more about them. I found myself oddly eager to learn anything I could about the three brothers.

"Dori was really reckless when he was young. He always wanted to train to be a warrior, or a mercenary.

-Really?

-Yes, he would always try and sneak out of our home to follow the caravans of traders. He didn't want to be a merchant though he really wanted to be one of the warriors hired to protect them.

-I guess it does sounds like something he'd do, protecting everyone that is.

-Aye' Ori whispered softly, looking once more sad.

-What made him change his mind?' I asked him, hoping to bring him out of his forlorn thoughts.

-Our father's death."

Oh boy.

Well done Amelia.

I bit my lower lip and took a deep breath.

"Ori, I'm sorry, really.

-T'is fine. It's no secret, really, and it's been such a long time anyway.' He stopped at that and I couldn't quite decipher what he felt at the moment.

-How long has it been?' I whispered, feeling as if Ori might want to keep on talking.

-Our father died when I was eleven. Dori was barely eighty when he had to leave home and become a trader. It's very young for a dwarf, you know?"

I nodded. Truthfully, I didn't know. Eighty was plain old for me, but I guessed that people looking so fit past 150 would believe 80 to be young. Looking at Ori, I was glad I had guessed correctly; he clearly wanted to speak about those things. It made me wonder if he ever spoke about it. From what I could gather, Ori was young for a dwarf.

I had been really young too at my parents' death and had been meeting with a psychologist for years after the accident. Maybe Ori really needed to talk to someone who hadn't known them and who wouldn't hurt in the way his brothers surely would if they were to talk together.

In the end, Ori didn't give me enough time to speak, and just talked some more.

"He was a merchant you see' He started to explain.' And one day his group simply didn't come back. It took awhile to find out what had really happened, and even then we couldn't be sure anyway. Who could know what really occurred that day?

-So Dori chose to take back your father's activities?' My voice was barely above a whisper, just like Ori's.

-Well, yeah. He had to be the man of the family. He had to help our mother bring money and food home. It was difficult already at that time.

-What do you mean?

-Well. Have you heard of Erebor?' He asked me and I nodded. 'After that, our people had to run away. They stayed homeless for almost thirty years.

-Thirty years?' I couldn't help but exclaim.

-Aye. They had nowhere to go, nowhere they could stay. Until Thorin and Thrain, Thorin's father, decided to come here. The Blue Mountains had once been home for other dwarves. Thorin's father disappeared though, and in the end Thorin and the others found the caves here.

-Are you telling me that for thirty years your family had no real house?' I was still stunned by that information.

-Aye. Humans usually mock dwarves and say we don't have homes and we are used to wander the earth. Both my brothers were born during this period of wandering, though I don't think Nori remember any of it.

-That's…' I couldn't find words to express my shock. Had no one around helped the survivors, the refugees? How awful could people in this age and place be, going so far as to mock them?

-After Thorin decided to set a settlement here, things started to get a little better, but most of the dwarves still had to wander in order to find people who would trade with us. The others had to both try to build something out of the caves and work in the mines. Things have started to look better, only thirty, maybe forty years ago."

I remained silent. Of course Danà's tale had already given me an idea of how life had been for the dwarves. But she hadn't detailed the difficulties they had encountered after the attack on their mountain. I didn't really know how to feel about all those information Ori had just provided me with.

I was shocked by peoples' lack of interest in another community's obvious suffering.

Ori remained silent for awhile before talking once more about his brother.

"Dori, he really didn't have much choice. He had to give up what he wanted for us. At our father's death, he had to help in any way he could and he had no choice but to become a merchant like our father. Contracts with partners had already been signed, you see, so he only had to follow up and develop the trading agreements.' He sighed before repeating 'Dori really had no choice…

-I'm not sure."

The words had escaped my mouth without me being able to do anything to stop them. Ori looked up and sent me a questioning glance. I shrugged and explained my thoughts.

"You could say he chose to protect you all. Sounds cliché, but might be truer than you'd think. Taking care of you, of Nori and your mother, I think that's what motivated him too."

The silence that followed my statement stretched for several long minutes until Ori attempted a small smile at me and said a bit louder than before.

"You know, one day, Dori actually managed to sneak behind our father. I think he was around 70, maybe 75. He followed our father for quite some miles too. I don't remember it much, but when I was young, Nori would tell me how grumpy Dori had looked when Mother had walked all the way down to catch him. Nori said Dori's yelps were heard in all the Blue Mountains when mother brought him back home."

I laughed good-heartedly at the image of a younger Dori being forced back home by a bearded woman.

"Where were you then?

-I was still a wee child. Nori was taking care of me at the time. Nori and Dori always take care of me.' He sounded slightly grumpy when he said this last part and it made me smile.

-Don't tell me you'd rather they didn't care.' I was still smiling, I couldn't imagine Ori without his brothers by his side.

-I'd rather they'd care but acknowledge I'm an adult too." He pulled a face and I laughed.

Soon Ori was chuckling too. I smiled fondly at him and was just about to change topics when Ori asked me a question this time.

"Amelia, are you considered an adult where you come from?

-Yes. People reach adulthood at 18, or 21 depending on the country, hem kingdom, realm?' He nodded to let me know he had understood and then asked once more.

-And do you still live with your parents until you are married?

-Well…I did live with my aunt and uncle but…' I couldn't finish my sentence that Ori immediately asked.

-You didn't live with your Ma and Pa?"

Oh, Ori you're too much like me. You have a gift for asking questions. I couldn't feel offended or hurt though. First he couldn't have known. Second, I just had asked him similar things.

"Well, they both died when I was seven.

-Oh"

We were both rescued from this awkward situation when Dori came in. He had a frown on his face that disappeared when he saw Ori and me. Nori followed soon after, his face entirely blank. He did look slightly curious though when he saw Ori's face. Ori on the other hand was clearly surprised to see his second brother; he had obviously not expected it.

Glancing at Ori I could see that, despite his surprise at seeing both his brothers, he was still feeling bad and uneasy for bringing out my own parents death.

In order to cheer him up, and because there wouldn't be any harm done in that, I looked at Dori with a cheeky grin. He sent me a questioning glance and I smiled before asking him in a sweet voice.

"So, that time you sneaked after your father, how many miles did your mother have to run before she caught you and kicked you back here yelping loudly?"

Ori laughed joyously at Dori's red cheeks and I felt my heart lighten at seeing him like this. Even Nori couldn't help but chuckle a bit. Dori recovered quickly before answering with a very sweet tone too.

"Oh, Ori was remembering our childhood then. Did he tell you about the time he decided it'd be a good idea to practice his penmanship on mother's dress?"

I roared with laughter while Ori spluttered, cheeks as red as tomatoes.

The rest of that morning was filled with memories and laughter. Looking at the three smiling and chuckling brothers, I remember thinking the day couldn't get bad after such a start.

* * *

Later that day, Danà was eager to know how the brother had enjoyed their dinner. She had come to meet with me in the middle of the afternoon, and I had spent quite some time cleaning the apartment after lunch. Who said three men didn't dirty a place much? Suffice is to say I was happy to be distracted from my duties. I mock glared at her and related what had transpired the previous day.

"I told you you'd be good to them' She chuckled teasingly.

-Well, at least Nori was nice enough to eat everything in his plate.' I shrugged while I finished tidying up the kitchen.

-Was he? Hmm"

I glanced at her but I could only distinguish sincere surprise on her face, though there seem to be something else shining in her eyes. I was about to ask her why she seemed so surprised but she was quicker than me. She stood up and grabbed my elbow, smiling warmly.

"Let's go Amelia. We wouldn't want to wait for all the stalls to be empty."

She guided me once more to the market, though we arrived a bit later than the day before. This time we went further in, going slowly in the direction of the massive entrance doors. Wandering around I ended up noticing cups, glasses, bowls and other tools made in silver and copper. It wasn't too far from the entrance but probably not one of the 'human tolerated' stands.

I could easily recognize the product sold by Dori at the shop in Beinne and I couldn't resist going toward that stand in order to have a better look.

"Those are amazing' I told Danà 'They're so detailed, I love them."

I was in front of the stall when I realized the merchant, or maybe the artisan, was here, I looked up to greet him when my eyes locked on his forehead.

I swear I felt all the blood leave my face.

My medical knowledge and common sense were telling me it just wasn't possible. My eyes were screaming the contrary.

The man had what looked like a metallic tool embedded in his head. Yet he was apparently breathing and very much alive.

"Hello…'I foolishly said and he huffed something I didn't catch.

-Bifur, this is Amelia. She's Balin and Dori's ward.' Danà told the man before whispering quickly to me 'Don't comment on the axe, I'll explain later.' Then loudly she said 'Amelia, this is Bifur. He's Bofur cousin.

-Oh. Hem hello then Bifur, I'm Amelia please…no hem, at your service."

I bowed slightly and heard a grunt followed by a few strange sounding words. Looking at Danà she seemed extremely pleased with something but I couldn't put my finger on it. I decided not to think about it too much, I really couldn't guess what was in that woman's head.

I wanted nothing more than to look at the merchandises on this stand, but the axe in this man's head disturbed me greatly. It even wobbled slightly when he moved and shrugged. My eyes were comically wide I imagine the first time I saw him nod. I swear I thought the axe would fall but no, it held its ground, firmly planted in his brain.

How could he be alive?

I could understand adrenaline shots that made normal people do incredible things, but that was a tad too much. That wasn't logical.

I shook my head, staring was rude and I didn't want to offend or upset the walking and breathing medical case study I had in front of me. Oh I wished I had all the equipment to have a proper look in his head.

I had to remind myself that dissecting someone who was alive would surely kill him, especially if it was the head you opened.

Trying to get out of my daydreaming I concentrated once more on the man's products. My eyes shifted from one object to another before I found at a corner of the small stand a few painted figurines.

"Oh, Danà, look at those! They're so beautiful."

Danà snorted while I asked the dwarf in front of me if I could hold one of the figurines to have a closer look. I took his non committed shrug for a yes and carefully grabbed one of the small figures.

It was heavier than I had thought it would be. I realized the figure was entirely made of metal, which one I didn't know, and had been carefully painted with an impressive attention to the smallest of details.

I put the small dwarf warrior back next to his friends and looked at the others. There was a taller figurine, still evidently representing a dwarf though, that looked to be made in a different material. I glanced at Bifur questioningly and earned a nod and axe wobble instead of simple 'yes'.

I took the second warrior which was lighter, probably made of wood, and I was surprised to discover, articulated.

"Those are Bifur's and Bofur's creations. Bifur make them and carve them, Bofur paint them and add the small details. Though, Bofur's quite good at whittling too, it's one of his hobbies.

-Those are superb, really. Do they make the plates and cups too?

-Yes, those are actually what they sell most. The toys, well they make them because they enjoy crafting them.' She glanced at Bifur before whispering to my ear 'And it sooth Bifur sometimes to concentrate on small figurines and toys."

I nodded, still completely enticed by the toys and not really paying attention to her words.

"I don't know whether I should be surprised that Bofur actually create toys.' I said smirking slightly.

-He's a child at heart, it makes sense for them to do that." Danà answered, smiling behind her beard.

Putting back the toys I saw small metallic beads next to them and didn't hesitate to grab one.

"Danà, would it be appropriate for me to have such beads in my hair?

-Not the one you took I'm afraid' she answered sincerely

-Why?

-The material. This one is made of copper. Copper is traditionally braided in young children, boys.' She explained patiently and I couldn't discern any mockery in her tone. 'Women would use other materials. Pearls and beads made of precious stones, ribbons for the youngest, otherwise silver and gold are common to both men and women, though more used among women on a daily basis.

-I didn't know it'd be so complicated to find a bead' I smiled

-We should find you something to put in your hair. Don't you ever braid them?

-Well, I only know how to make a basic braid, and I'm not really good at it.

-You should have told me, I'll show you if you wish.

-Remember the last time I asked someone to help me? I don't think Nori forgot it." I smirked, blushing a bit as this whole story still embarrassed me a little.

Danà laughed heartily and I heard the dwarf, Bifur, grunt something while looking questioningly at us. Danà quickly and lowly spoke in this foreign language I couldn't understand. When she finished explaining whatever it was she wanted to say, Bifur started to laugh too.

He was bent in two, hands clutching at his belly, shaking with laughter. My eyes though were completely caught in the sight of the piece of axe that was positively jiggling up and down. At some point I felt my hand lift on its own volition.

I was entirely hypnotized by the sight of the piece of metal and I could only be a silent witness when my hand made its way towards the dwarf's head.

Hadn't it been for Danà slapping said unceremonious hand away, I think I would actually have pushed and probed at the poor man's forehead.

Under Danà's disapproving glance though, I cleared my throat and put both my hands behind my back, looking rather sheepish, I did send her way an apologetic smile. I was glad to realize she wasn't offended, merely amused and slightly exasperated by my antics.

Thankfully Bifur hadn't realized anything; he was way too occupied laughing. After awhile, Danà let the dwarf chuckle on his own and turned back to me. She looked pensive for a minute before shaking her head a bit.

"Anyway,' she said simply 'you should ask Dori and Balin to braid your hair.

-What? No way I'm ever going to ask that to anyone! Ever! ' I said eliciting a chuckle in Danà who explained gently.

-You need to have a braid indicating you're someone's ward. This way everyone would know you've been welcomed in our halls. Dori and Balin would have to do it soon.

-Seriously? You have a special braid to show you're someone's ward? I thought all those people were present during the oath in order to then tell everyone.

-It's different. They'll tell there's a human who has been accepted as a ward. That's not nearly as precise as you having a braid that'll claim your guardianship to all dwarves around."

Danà smirked and then continued to explain.

"Braids, hair and beards are extremely important in our culture, I'm sure you already guessed as much. Beads are an inherent part of the braids. A large steel beaded braid in a warrior's beard will indicate his rank and status in battle.

-So Gloin for example?' I asked remembering the various decorations in the dwarf's voluminous beard.

-My husband is a gifted warrior.' She said proudly 'He's captain of the guards. He's in charge of their training mostly but goes out on special mission too."

I won't lie. I was impressed.

I was starting to be really curious about their weird culture. On one hand they were loud and blunt, on the other they were putting extra attention on details and had a sort of mute sub culture that was focused only on hairdo. What a strange world.

"Then what kind of bead can I take?

-How old are you exactly?

-25."

Her eyes widened significantly and she exclaimed.

"So young? Oh dear you're a child still.

-What? I'm not! Please remember I'm human…

-Still. Well ribbons wouldn't do, unless there sewn with gold or silver threads. We could use some coloured leather first. I don't think it'll be a good idea for you to directly wear some more meaningful beads.

-I shouldn't stand out too much, that's what you mean.' I said with a smile.

-Yes.' She looked a bit sheepish 'Wait a bit and then we'll see. If Oin takes you as an apprentice and you later become a healer, then you'll have some particular braids and beads to wear.

-I'm starting to believe I'll never remember everything there is to remember about braids." I joked, making her laugh.

We discussed some more and she guided me to a stand where we bought some long leather strands that were braided together three by three in larger threads. I could use those in my hair. She handed them to me and I happily looked at the small designs that the dwarf had managed to carve even in the thinnest of those strands.

I was still analyzing them thoroughly when Danà patted my shoulder and told me.

"I have a few things to buy, food mostly' Danà then asked 'Do you wish to follow me or would you rather wander a bit alone?

-Oh, I'd like to have a look at some of the jewels over there' I said pointing toward the entrance.

-Alright but don't go wandering too far away, it wouldn't do if I lost you on your second day here."

I laughed at that, she sounded just like my aunt did when I was but a child. It felt so familiar that a nice, warm filling spread in my chest. When I saw though, that Danà was genuinely worried I put a hand on her shoulder and tried to reassure her.

"Don't worry Danà. After all, you can't lose me: I'm the only non bearded woman around."

She laughed at that and agreed to leave me alone on that side of the market before going quickly back at the other side, in the part where food was sold.

I looked at her disappearing back before gesturing a goodbye from afar to Bifur who huffed and then turned around and headed for the jewels stands. Well I was a woman in a city renowned for its jewellers. I was curious.

I hummed an undefined tune under my breath while happily walking toward the stands. Those were nearest to the entrance with the weapons smiths' stands; apparently men around bought weapons and jewels. Maybe they needed one to defend the other…who knows.

I was amazed by the quality of the products, their intricate designs, the precision and details given to each piece. I was far from being an expert but those were really the most beautiful necklaces, bracelets and brooches I had ever seen. I was awed in front of the stand.

I don't know how long I stayed there, going from one piece to the other, marvelling over each of them and saying so to the dwarf who simply smiled proudly and nicely at me.

I knew it was late in the afternoon though and I started to wonder why Danà hadn't come back already. I stepped a bit away from the stalls; I wanted to have a look at the view of the valley from the entrance. Glancing through the massive doors I could see the sky starting to darken at the horizon and some bright stars were already appearing. The entrance faced the east, I could tell as much easily; the sunset was nowhere in sight and the few sunrays were peeking from the other side of the mountains. It was late.

Down in the valley I could see the town of men that had settled here after the dwarves had come. There were fields and a small, clear river on the left side of town but not too far on the right a large forest covered the landscape in shades of green. The road getting down from the Halls' entrance to town was paved with blue veined stones. It was beautiful.

I took a few steps outside before turning slowly back inside, back to the jeweller's stall.

I was deep in thought when a hand brutally fell on my shoulder, startling me, and a gruff voice spoke loudly in my ear. A cold shiver ran down my spine.

"What are you still doing here? Come on, quickly, go back home."

I looked, startled, at the man whose hand was pushing me outside the doors. Why was he touching me? Why was he pushing me out? Who was he? I could see easily with his height that he was human and immediately hated how he towered over me. It took me some time to understand what was happening and I was already outside the doors and on the paved road when I started to struggle in his grip.

"Leave me alone' I said, trying to push his hand away 'I'm living there."

He laughed at me and I realized the sound seemed to echo around. Befuddled I looked around and saw that there were three of them.

"Right, you're a dwarf maiden living in the halls of the mighty dwarves.' one of them joked.

-Come on lass, quickly go home before the dwarves kick you out.' the third one simply said.

-No, you don't understand.' I tried to explain while pushing as hard as I could against the man's grip.

-Your family we'll be worried.' the one who held me gruffly said.

-But I don't have any family here. I'm living with the dwarves now!"

Those stupid men were really starting to annoy me, especially the one who had my shoulder in a death grip. He was hurting me and I couldn't escape his hold, especially now that his second hand held my arm.

"You're an orphan?' The third man asked, leering at me.

-Yes, well, not really. It's complicated.

-Are your parents around? He insisted.

-No, but…' I couldn't say more as the one holding me exclaimed.

-Oh. So you're an orphan and you thought it'd be nice to go have a look at the dwarves. Well you had your fun lass, so now leave them alone. They don't like humans wandering their halls aimlessly.

-But that's what you don't understand…

-No, you don't understand.' He said and suddenly turned me to face him. 'Dwarves wouldn't appreciate you putting your nose in the bloody holes they call home. If they're pissed then their prices go up and if their prices go up then I'm pissed. Do you want me to be pissed lass?"

He was shaking me violently now.

He was hurting me. My arms were held too tightly, too strongly and my neck burnt from the strain imposed by the violent shaking.

This man was mental; I knew I should have taken this psychiatry option back in uni. He was hurting me but something stopped me from yelling and calling for help. I had absolutely no idea how he'd react to me screaming and I didn't wish to die because he was too stupid to listen to me.

"Do you want to anger me lass?" he asked, still shaking me like a Polaroid picture.

"No, no I'm sorry" I managed to say.

I was immensely grateful when he stopped. I didn't dare look up at him and I couldn't help but notice he still hadn't freed me from his painful grip on my arms. I already knew I would bruise, badly. I quickly glanced at the two other men. One had long grey hair that fell like rat tails on his shoulders and a badly broken nose. He was thin and had a scary glint in his eyes.

The third had an ugly scar that ran on his cheek and chin and missed several teeth. The three of them, including Mr Deathgrip and his angry angular face, were the perfect pictures of medieval villains in movies. Dirty, terribly smelly and incredibly creepy. They reeked of sweat and other odours I didn't dare to identify.

"What should we do with her?" Scarface asked.

To my utter horror they actually started to discuss what they should do with me without even bothering asking for my opinion.

"She's an orphan, so she has no one to go to.' Rat-tails said.

-If I let you go your way, are you going to try and sneak back in the dwarves' halls?' Deathgrip asked me.

-No, never!" I replied automatically.

He seemed to consider my answer for a minute, staring at me with angry eyes. I was completely lost as to what to do. I wasn't prepared to face such a situation and these men were far from behaving in a familiar way. To me they were entirely unpredictable, and that meant they scared me.

I had just one plan to get out of this situation, and that was to try and stall for time as much as possible. Danà was bound to look for me and surely someone would have seen these men forcing me out. Then it hit me. Why would the dwarves pay attention to men's business? For the dwarves I was human, surely for them it wasn't even worth notice that I had been guided outside by three men.

I had been stupid enough not to react and make a scene. I wanted to kick myself. How could I be such a fool? Really it seemed suddenly that I deserved to be kidnapped by the three ugly villains just because I was stupid enough to let them.

Deathgrip's words brought me back to focus.

"I don't believe you"

A feeling of dread started to pool in my stomach. What were they going to do? I knew my face was white as a sheet and my situation seemed to worsen every minute. Scarface then asked his friend.

"What should we do with her then?

-If we let her go, she'll sneak in the dwarf's territory." Deathgrip grumbled.

I tried to shook my head no to make him understand I wouldn't but his glare stopped me. I could feel painful stabs in my arms where he was violently clutching me. There was absolutely no way for me to break free of his hold. He was way too strong.

"Then we can take her with us. She has no family to claim her anyway." Rat-tails said.

Scared didn't even come close to describe what I was feeling. I was properly terrified. Did this man just say what I thought he said? Did they actually think I'd follow them to whatever hole, rock or dung they called their house? Did they actually believe I could be claimed like an object or property?

Now didn't seem like a good time to realize that apparently, here, such 'claims' were natural. My mind was whirling with thoughts, yet I couldn't utter one word to express myself.

Wait, where these three men even remotely as honourable as the dwarves had been? I felt as if I couldn't breathe normally anymore.

"Aye. We ought to take her with us. Take care of her. Poor lass alone in this dangerous world" Deathgrip said smirking in a way that had a cold shiver ran down my spine.

"No" I squeaked before he shook me once, more violently than before and I yelped.

I didn't have any more time to protest as he tugged at my arms, forcing me to follow them as I tried my best to struggle away. He probably saw me inhale as much hair as I could and guessed I was about to scream for he pressed his disgusting hand on my face and squeezed my face painfully.

"Don't even try to make a scene, lass. No one can claim you, so no one will bother to ask why you scream."

I looked at him with wide eyes and I swear he smiled gleefully when he saw how afraid I was.

As I was forced to follow them in the direction of the men's village, I glanced quickly behind me, extremely upset to see the doors of Thorin's Halls disappear in the shadows of the night. Tears menaced to pool in my eyes and I swallowed them back as best as I could, biting harshly on my bottom lip to avoid screaming and thus risking angering them.

What was going to happen now?

* * *

**A/N: Once more I want to thank the people who reviewed or added alerts on this story! It's really great to feel such support and it makes me wants to keep on writing and updating. :) Thanks to you all**

**So, I hope everyone appreciated the change in atmosphere. I wanted to add some more details about the Ri brothers, I hope it didn't disappoint anyone. **

**From now on things will start to move a bit more...**

**I'll probably update tomorrow. :) **


	7. Dwarves don't cuddle

**I do not own anything, it all belongs to JRR Tolkien. I only own my OC and the plot.**

**WARNING: Violence vaguely described. **

* * *

I was probably one of the unluckiest persons to exist. Or the stupidest.

First I had found my way to this place which was oh so conveniently stuck in middle age era. Then I had embarrassed myself in front of the people I wanted to make a good impression on, repeatedly of course.

And now this.

The three awful men were still forcing me to follow them. I tried to reign on my fears and forced my brain to think about a way to get out of this situation. Surely when we'll enter the village, someone would help me if I yelled and fought tooth and nails. Maybe they wouldn't deliver me, but someone would go and tell the dwarves what was happening. Right?

My hopes were crushed in an instant when we didn't pass across the village. Gone were my opportunities to call for help. Now we were walking in the direction of the nearby forest. I had troubles following behind these men long strides. Each time I would stumble on the uneven ground, Deathgrip would yank at my arm to the point I thought he would rip it off. My shoulder was burning under the pain but I clenched my teeth, determined not to yelp.

They guided me through the foliage for awhile, entering the forest grounds. It took me some time to discern four equines forms and the low light of a small campfire further ahead. Night had fallen now and the shadows of the trees didn't help me see anything. At that moment I saw a human silhouette, crouched next to the fire.

Great, now there were four of them, I thought as my gaze fell upon the man. He was as creepy looking as the others; he was shorter and fatter, his shirt was soiled with grease and probably other substances I didn't want to recognize.

My thoughts were focused on one thing only. I was trying to find a way to escape from them when Deathgrip called Fatty loudly.

"Look what we found lurking around the Beggars' Halls." He joked before harshly pushing me towards the fourth man.

I stumbled and ungracefully fell on the ground in a heap. At that moment I realized that during all that time I had held onto the leather ribbons Danà had bought for me. The ribbons were now dispersed in front of me; I had released my grip on them when I fell, trying to use my hands to absorb some of the shock and avoid hurting myself too badly.

I had felt a sudden sting in my left palm when it connected with the ground and I just knew I had opened it on a sharp rock or another similar object. When I said I was lucky, I didn't lie…

I bit back a curse and quickly looked around for an escape route.

Objectively I knew my chances were slim, I didn't know anything about fighting and had never been good in any sports. My brain was my only chance, I had to outwit those men, but right now my mind was quite hindered by fear. Still I knew I'd be safe if I could just run back to the village, or better still, Thorin's Halls.

"Tch, look at that, the lass even brought some bracelets for tonight." Scarface exclaimed while stooping down and grabbing one of the leather ribbons and holding it for his friends to see.

What did he mean by that?

I stared at him with wide, frightened eyes when it finally dawned on me.

No. No bloody way I'd let them bind me.

I started to crawl backwards and scrambled, trying to stand up. They were laughing loudly at my obvious fear. I was just barely standing once more when Rat-tails took a few strides and grabbed me, wrenching at my wrists. This time I couldn't hold back my cry of pain. Worst though was the fact that I couldn't even have the opportunity to start running.

Hell these men had no notion of force. Every time they put their dirty hands on me they hurt, quite a lot.

I winced and tried to free my arms, just to have him squeeze my wrists more brutally. He laughed loudly at my face and threw me towards Scarface. I ended up falling on the ground at their feet once more.

Suddenly I started to feel shame as well. I couldn't believe I was so weak, so pathetic, but my blood was too frozen by fear for me to react in any kind of heroic way.

Deathgrip pulled violently on my arm to force me to stand. Between Scarface and him, it didn't take them long to bind my wrists together in front of me. The leather bit my skin and I stopped struggling quickly when I realized they had bound the strings tightly enough to cut the blood circulation and potentially break my skin if I tugged on it too hard.

"You can't do this. You have no right." I whispered, astonished at the whole situation.

I couldn't comprehend what was happening. It all occurred so fast. It was surreal. One minute I was looking at beautiful jewellery and landscape and the next these brutes were taking me away.

Oh my god, Danà. Danà would believe I had run away and would tell so to the three brothers. Dori, Nori and Ori would think I had broken our contract. They'd think I had left them. They wouldn't look for me. No one would.

No one would come and rescue me.

I started to tremble violently and fell on my knees. The men probably thought it was some kind of sign that I was resigned to my fate. They gathered around the fire, ignoring me completely and started to talk loudly together while one of them was putting a cauldron on top of the flames.

If no one would rescue me, that meant one thing, I had to rescue myself. I had to try anything I could.

I shifted slightly, testing my legs, readying myself to jump and sprint back in the direction of the village. It wasn't too far. If I was quick enough, and lucky, then maybe, just maybe I could outrun these men and reach the village. Once there, someone was bound to help me.

I took a deep breath and slowly started to stand. The men didn't pay attention to me. I observed them and, seeing that they were busy preparing their diner, I bolted.

"Hey!" I heard one of them yell before uttering a curse.

For a second I thought my plan would work.

It didn't.

I had barely run ten meters that one of them was yanking hard on my long hair.

I yelled loudly and fell on the ground as the tug had made me stumble backwards, destabilizing my precarious balance. I felt my hip painfully hit some rocks and I yelped some more. Tears menaced to fall from my eyes but I managed somehow to stop them. I even managed to send a hateful glare to the bastard, Scarface, who simply snickered.

He didn't bother to grab my arm this time and just kept on yanking on my hair as if it were some kind of rope, forcing me to crawl at his feet like an animal. He sent me back rolling on the rocky ground to his friends' feet.

Another one, Rat-tails, grabbed my hands and yanked me up again before throwing me next to a log where the horses were kept. There he attached a rope to my wrists, tugging on it to make sure I couldn't escape. When he was done I looked at him, hoping he would reconsider I whispered

"Please, please let me go. My friends…"

He backhanded me, sending me to the ground in a heap.

I didn't say anything else. Head held low I couldn't hold the tears back anymore.

My cheek was burning and sending tendrils of pain in my head. My mind was swarming with awful thoughts of what these men could possibly do to me. I was quivering, shaking like a leaf really. I do not think I had ever been so scared in my whole life. Even the cave accident was nothing compared to the terror I was experiencing right now.

Bending to the point my forehead almost touched the grass, I pressed my hands tightly on my mouth, attempting to muffle my cries as I didn't want these men to pay any attention to me.

I didn't understand. I couldn't understand. How could they treat me or anyone really, like this? It felt as if I was nothing but some meat, some animal, or some bloody object to use and discard at will.

I was completely lost in my terrified daze, which probably explains why I didn't realize at first that new people had arrived at the men's camp. The sound of a particular voice broke me free from my terror though and I looked up again.

Hope. I dared not hope, but it still welled up in me, trying to crush every other feelings.

"What are you doing here? We have no more business to do with you for now.' Deathgrip grunted.

-We are looking for one of our own.' Dori politely said.

-There's no dwarf here!" Scarface snapped

I couldn't risk it. I couldn't stay stunned at their presence and silent if that meant they might not see me. I was in the shadows, tied to a log and between horses; it was possible they simply wouldn't see me.

I had to speak up.

"Dori, Nori, Gloin!" I exclaimed, my voice strangled, trying to stand up but failing as the rope was too short. I was forced to kneel next to the log, my arms bent in an odd way to allow me to look at the dwarves.

I saw Nori's eyes find mine and I was shocked at the fury in them. I shrunk. Were they that angry with me? Did that mean they would abandon me? Surely they wouldn't have come to find me to abandon me…unless they just wanted to break the contract and be done with me. But it didn't make sense for them to do that. My mind was crowded with thoughts and possibilities to the point that I could barely think at all.

I felt my lower lip starting to tremble and I bit it. I was trying hard to focus on the discussion that took place near the fire. It felt as if my life was being gambled under my very eyes and I had no power over the result of the bet.

"I never said we were looking for a dwarf.' Dori continued unperturbed 'Now, please kindly release our ward from her bounds."

I hadn't known Dori for a long time, but I had never heard such a stern, deadly serious tone in his voice. I guessed he would have made a damn good mercenary with such a scary tone.

"She's an orphan. You have no claim on her." Rat-tails grunted.

"She's our ward and has been sworn under the protection of King Thorin. Release her!" Gloin ordered.

I could see with horror that Fatty and Scarface had drawn long swords out of their scabbards. Gloin was lazily holding on his axe, a very small axe, while Nori had his arms crossed on his chest and Dori held two small and fragile looking swords. I suddenly felt more scared for them than for myself. I wouldn't be able to live with myself if they died because of me.

"Why should I care about that Beggar King" Deathgrip snorted and then spat on the floor at Dori's feet.

Oh…bad move.

I could easily observe the effect of his words on the three dwarves. Yep, they had been angry and furious, now they were positively livid. The men had apparently broken an important cultural rule 'don't badmouth the King'.

"You. Will. Release. Her. Now." Dori enunciated in a steely voice.

"Or what?" Rat-tails stupidly taunted them.

"Or nothing" Gloin casually answered.

The ginger dwarf was playing with his small axe, lifting it and tossing it a few inches in the air above his hand before catching it again. The whole area was silent and my eyes seemed to be glued to Gloin's axe which seemed to always go higher and higher in the air at each playful throw he made. Then, before my brain could actually register his moves, he suddenly threw the small axe in Rat-tails' direction.

In the same swift move he had brought his hands behind his back and retrieved a massive axe that had been hidden until then. I gasped.

Then I turned quickly away when I saw the small axe had embedded itself deeply in Rat-tails' chest. The dwarves shouted some war cry and there was a fury of sounds. I heard rapid steps coming in my direction and I felt a hand grab my hair. I had just the time to yelp before a terrifying shout echoed from behind my back. I heard some more scuffles sounds and I could easily imagine what a gory scene was being played right behind me. I remained unmoving, entirely frozen.

Soon enough there was an eerie silence, broken by a whimper that ended in a disgusting gurgle. I didn't need to look around to know what medieval weapons could inflict and I didn't have the strength to look and see my friends' dead bodies on the ground. The thought only made my stomach churn and I suddenly felt a violent nausea.

I tried to take a deep breath but my nostrils were assaulted by a tangy smell I knew too well. Blood. Usually it wouldn't have bothered me, but knowing it might be Dori's, Nori's or Gloin's made me want to scream.

My eyes were wide open, staring unseeingly at my bound wrists. I startled violently when a hand softly pressed my shoulder.

"Amelia?"

I turned as quickly as I could; wrenching my own arms against my bonds, a burning sting made me aware I had most certainly cut my wrists on the leather strings. I didn't care though as soon as I found myself looking directly in Nori's grey eyes. The fury I had seen earlier had entirely disappeared and I was relieved to only discern concern and worry in them. From the corner of my eyes I saw Dori and Gloin coming closer.

"Nori…" I whimpered.

I realized then that Nori held two long, weirdly shaped daggers; the blades seemed to be curved at the middle. He quickly wiped them of the blood that coated them and sheathed one back before kneeling next to me and swiftly cutting the rope that held me to the fallen log. The tension I had put on my shoulders to be able to face him eased away and I breathed in relief. He was about to cut the leather strings when I whispered sadly.

"Danà bought them for me"

Nori glanced at me before swiftly sheathing his second dagger and started to silently work on the knots. It hurt when the last one fell on the ground and the blood rushed back in my fingers. I moaned and felt tears gather once more in my eyes.

The silence of the dwarves was starting to terrify me some more. The sheer amount of emotions battling in my chest was just too much for me to withstand. Suddenly I started to break into violent sobs but still managed to say or rather stutter.

"I'm so…so…so sorry…"

Nori immediately gathered me in his arms and started to caress my hair, shushing me and soothing me softly. I could feel Dori behind me, patting my back and rubbing his hand in soothing circles on it.

I don't know how long they waited for me to calm down a little but at some point I realized I had my nose buried in Nori's shoulder, basically rubbing my face on his tunic. I tried to get up, muttering another watery 'sorry', but his hand prevented me to get away.

I finally relaxed against his chest while he held me tightly against him. I pressed myself closer still, trying to lose myself in his warmth when I felt so cold with fear and shock. Nori's presence was unwavering and so real it kept me whole and soothed me. I hid my face against him, closing my eyes and feeling the beads of his beard pressed against my cheek.

I could hear Gloin speak not too far from us and his grave, gruff voice stirred me from my shocked daze.

"Well, Thorin will be glad. We finally got rid of those ruffians."

I think it was Dori who answered with a grunt while still trying to sooth me.

"We should bring her to my brother" Gloin added then.

I perked up and was ashamed to hear my own squeaky and shaky voice. I sounded like a little girl who just had a nightmare. Well I supposed it wasn't far from that.

"Are they…you know…

-Dead. Yes they are.' Nori answered matter-of-factly and I whimpered.

-I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to…oh my god what are you going to do?" I was aware I was rambling, but my mind was quite the mess at that moment.

I could only think about all the problems and troubles I had just caused to my friends. Then the very idea of them being put in jails because of me made me cry some more. In between two sobs I managed to clutch at Nori's tunic and wailed.

"I don't want you to go in jail…"

I didn't see their stunned faces but Dori patted me some more before softly speaking.

"Why would we go in jail missy?

-You ki…kill…killed those bastards…' I cried aloud

-Well, we won't go to jail for that I assure you."

That broke through my cloudy mind. I glanced up at Nori, stupefied.

"What? Why?

-Amelia, they attacked our ward. With your oath and contracts, you are now sworn under the dwarves' protection. They had no right to take you away.' Dori patiently explained in a gentle, calming voice.

-And we had every right to rip them to pieces." Gloin added with a disturbingly happy smirk.

I blinked at them and simply nodded. I seriously didn't have the willpower to ponder on this. I put this piece of information in the back of my head and chose to forget about it for now. Feeling suddenly exhausted I sighed and let my head fall back on Nori's shoulder, my eyes closing on their own volition.

I felt safe with them, even though they had just 'ripped to pieces' men who were bigger than them. I didn't care they had just killed four men, I was just glad they had came for me and didn't look like they would throw me away in the next few minutes.

I somehow registered through my hazy thoughts that Nori had picked me up and was holding me against his chest. I marvelled at his strength when I felt that he was moving, quite probably walking back toward the Halls. I dozed off for a bit only to stir and awaken when I heard another known voice.

"How's the lass?"

Was that Bofur? Were where we?

"She got quite a fright.' Dori answered while Gloin grunted.

-Bofur?' I whispered questioningly peeking up from Nori's shoulder.

-Aye."

I looked around to find out we were at the edge of the men's village. There were three other dwarves there, Bofur, Bifur and Ori. The youngest one quickly came to me and gingerly poked my shoulder.

"Are you alright?" He asked, clearly unsure

I nodded, trying to force a smile on my face but miserably failing to do so. As Nori started to walk once more, the other surrounded us, talking together. I could hear Gloin recalling the battle and found out then that Deathgrip had been slaughtered by an angry Nori while Fatty had met Dori's precise blades. Scarface had gotten acquainted with Gloin massive axe, suffice is to say that his scars were now indiscernible.

I let Nori's strides lull me back into a peaceful doze while the other's rumbling voices reassured me.

* * *

I came back to reality when I felt myself being torn away from Nori's warmth. I startled and tried to jump back in his direction only to have his warm hands pushing on my shoulders and back on what I realized to be a bed. Looking around I found out we were now in an unknown room, but the ceiling was such an example of dwarf's craft that I soon relaxed. I was back within the halls and that was enough.

Turning my head slightly I met with Nori's grey eyes. He was evidently worried about me and I smiled to reassure him.

"Don't worry' I managed to whisper 'It's only a few bruises, scratches and a big scare."

It felt strange in a way to be the one to reassure him. Truth was I didn't feel alright, I had been really scared by those men, mostly because of the fact I didn't know what to expect and I certainly never had thought that such a thing could happen. It had been a rude awakening to how people in this era behaved, but my rational mind could tell it had been necessary.

The whole uncertainty and surprise had made me react in such a frightened and helpless way. Now, I knew what to expect and I would prepare myself to those eventualities I hadn't thought about. Now I saw the differences between how men and dwarves treated womenfolk.

How odd to think I trusted dwarves more than men.

Nori nodded but didn't move away. He stayed beside me but avoided to look at me, I didn't understand his reaction but was frankly too tired to ask. Dori's voice caught my attention then and I turned to the other side to look at an unknown dwarf.

"She's been hurt by those scoundrels' Dori was saying

-What squirrels? There're no squirrels in the halls…"

The second dwarf's answer took me by surprise and I couldn't stop a small laugh to bubble out of my chest. The dwarf with grey hair and beard glanced at me and smiled. He had bushy hair and only two braids in his moustache and beard that curled back up at the end. He shooed Nori and Dori away, ordering them out of the room.

The two brothers clearly didn't like it but had no other choices. Oin, as I found his name was, had authority here and he didn't mind using it. When we were alone, he turned towards me once more and produced from one of his pocket a sort of trumpet like thingy. I understood what it was used for when he put it against his ear and approached the bed.

"So my dear. They tell me you're a healer apprentice."

I hadn't expected that. I thought he would want to examine me after my little meeting with the local fauna. If he saw my surprise he didn't comment on it, patiently waiting for me to speak.

"Well, I was studying the human body and the ways to heal it."

He nodded at that and gestured at my body.

"So, what do you suffer from?"

One of my eyebrows was raised as I looked at him questioningly but his face didn't give anything away. Was this really the time to have some sort of interview? I guessed for him it was.

"Well, I have some minor cuts on my hands and wrists from a fall on stones and from the leather threads. Then there's probably a growing bruise on my face right now and some more of those on my arms, shoulders and probably knees and hip too. Nothing major really."

He kept silent, nodding at my words before he hummed and asked.

"What would you do then?

-Well, the cuts are really small, I'd clean them with clear water, boiled water mind you.' I added remembering that water here was not treated before muttering. 'There's really no need to stitch them…' I went to keep on when he spoke.

-You know how to stitch wounds?

-Yes.' I answered simply.

-Good, good. Continue.

-For the bruises, well if we were in my home I know what I'd put on it to lessen the pain and quicken the healing, but here? I guess I'll just leave them alone."

He was silent again then he hummed and went to a nearby cabinet and opened it. He rummaged through it, putting out a sort of jar and a metallic bowl before taking the bowl back outside.

I stayed alone for a few minutes, hearing muffled voices from the other room, before Oin came back in with the bowl and white linens. He gestured to me to sit down and I obeyed as quickly as I could.

"The water we keep here in the wards is boiled before we store it in those corked copper vases." He said, setting what I now realized was a copper bowl on a small table closed to my bed.

He gestured for me to show my hands and I did so without complain. He looked at the wounds for a short time before starting to clean them, beginning with my left hand. I winced slightly when he had to remove a small pebble from it. I bit my lip when he tugged on a small twig that had pierced below the skin. Blood had already started to dry.

Then he quickly cleaned it with fresh water and did my slightly hurt wrists at the same time. Gingerly, he took the jar and opened it. A nice smell was brought to my nose and I tried to identify it.

"This is a balm made with thyme and witch hazel mostly. That will soothe the pain and prevent any swelling and infection.

-thyme and witch hazel, alright.' I said, genuinely curious and interested.

-Had your cuts been bigger, I would have used honey to prevent infection and help the wound to heal quicker.' He explained was bandaging my hand and wrists.

-Honey?

-Yes. Now, for your bruises specifically, you can apply this other balm' he said while standing up and rummaging some more in the cabinet 'it's made with wild indigo and witch hazel."

I nodded and took the smaller jar he handed me.

"There's no need to apply much of it, just a bit is enough' he continued 'and have Dori prepare some of his beloved chamomile, it'll do you good."

I smiled at that and nodded. Yes, chamomile will do well for more than one reason. Chamomile was familiar, it was home, and it was safety. I needed that right now. I was about to ask him some more question when the door was jerked opened and to my utter horror I saw the King stride in.

"Oin' he nodded to the healer before looking at me 'I didn't think I'd see you back quite so soon Miss Amelia."

I gulped. This man scared me horribly. I knew he wasn't here to harm me, not much at least, but still his presence was overwhelming. He seemed to note my unease and chose to sit down next to me and asked in a softer voice.

"Explain what happened."

I swallowed and looked at my hands that still held the jar of balm given by Oin.

"I don't understand what happened sir. I was just looking at the jewellery and then I took a few steps out to look at the landscape… I swear I didn't even see these men. I was coming back in when Deathgrip forced me out of the market and told me you'd be angry if a human went too far inside. He pulled me all the way down, saying that if I was an orphan then they had the right to take me. I tried to tell them sir, I swear I told them I was living here, but they didn't believe me. And then they brought me to their camp and Dori, Nori and Gloin arrived a bit later."

I had talked at an amazing pace, getting everything out in just a few breathes. I was afraid of his reaction as I had no idea how he would react. Strangely enough the first word he spoke had me look at him puzzled.

"Deathgrip?"

I blinked a few times, trying to gather my thoughts.

"You said Deathgrip forced you out' He insisted and I finally understood.

-Oh' I blushed 'It's just, I didn't know their names. And he was quite strong and…well"

I turned my gaze back to my hands, embarrassed at my own foolishness. His next gesture stunned me though.

He gently took a few strands of my hair in his hand and said.

"You should have had Dori and Balin braid your hair already. That would have not prevented these men to act, but the dwarves around would have been quicker to react."

I looked at him questioningly

"I don't understand.' I frowned.

-As Balin's and Dori's ward, they should have made a braid here, behind your ear and put one bead each in it. The dwarves around would have recognize you as a ward of our kin, they wouldn't have let you being pulled out.

-Oh" I couldn't find another word.

I cleared my throat, and seeing that the King hadn't banished me yet I gathered my courage and asked him.

"What happened? Here I mean. How did you know where to look?"

To my surprise a small smirk graced his features, but it quickly disappeared and his face was back to its usual stern expression.

"You caused quite a stir Miss Amelia. Danà was running around in worry and informed Gloin of the situation. Of course they had to tell the Ri's brothers.' He snorted here before adding 'Danà was in quite a state until Lofà, the jeweller, arrived with Bifur."

I felt my eyebrows going all the way up to my hairline. Had I really caused such troubles to so many people? The King continued his tale, not reacting to my surprise.

"Lofà went to ask Bifur who you were; he said he was surprised to see such a young and nice missy with such a crowd of renowned ruffians.' At that a smirk tugged at the King's lips, he quickly continued. 'He had seen you speaking for awhile with Danà at Bifur's stand apparently. When Bifur told him you were Dori's ward, they immediately went to tell Gloin what happened. And then they all knew where to search for you."

We remained silent for a few minutes before he spoke once more.

"I hadn't seen those three brothers so worried in awhile. Even Bofur, who had simply come to meet his cousin, was in a frenzied state once he found out what happened. Even Bifur was quite eager to go and kill those mercenaries. I believe he'd be upset to have missed the fight.

-I'm really sorry for all the trouble I caused.' I whispered closing my eyes in shame.

-What's done is done. Besides, those men were bad business. They often caused trouble in the village and have been causing fights and brawls every time they came." He said angrily, but I knew his anger wasn't directed at me.

I looked at him, stunned to see he actually didn't care at all about their death and the fact that I had been the primary cause of it.

"Be careful from now on and get that braid. I believe Oin has accepted you as an apprentice so you'd have something useful to do." He finally said, standing up.

This man was weird. I couldn't decide whether he was nice or not. He seemed gruff and stern, yet he had taken the time to come see me and hadn't even scolded me. He was a total mystery to me. He was almost at the door when I cleared my throat and told him

"Thank you. I will do my best to help master Oin."

He simply nodded before going out. As soon as he had left, the door burst open once more and I was literally buried under bearded faces. Danà was amongst the first at my side.

"Oh my poor child.' She said, caressing my face 'My poor, poor child. How are you feeling?

-I'm fine Danà, don't worry.' I smiled softly at her.

-You're hurt, they hurt you!" Exclaimed Ori sadly while he pointed at my hands.

This little sentence had quite impressive results. Danà squeezed me in her arms, while Bofur and Gloin cursed loudly and started to grumble beneath their breath. Bifur was shaking his head with a deep frown on his face, making his axe wobble from side to side. Dori was hovering close by, sadness and was it guilt? Overly present on his gentle face.

I could see that Balin was here too, and I guessed it was normal as I was his ward too. He looked really annoyed, and I hoped it wasn't because of me, but when our eyes met his soft smile reassured me.

Nori was in the back of the room, hiding in the shadows, looking angry with a deep frown on his face and his arms crossed on his chest. His position reminded me of that he had just before slaughtering the men and it made me shiver.

Oin was the one to break everyone's angry thoughts.

"Oh shush all of you. The lass is fine.

-It's true. 'I said to stop the surging contestations 'Look, I'm fine. They didn't hurt me, just frightened me. I'm perfectly fine. Besides' I said pointing at my cuts 'I did this to myself when I fell and tried to escape."

No one seemed really convinced by my small voice. I cleared my throat a bit before continuing. I turned toward Ori who looked like his puppy had been meanly kicked and said.

"Did you know that thyme and, what was it Oin, wizard hazel?' I glanced at the healer who magically heard me clearly.

-Witch hazel' he provided.

-Right, so thyme and Witch hazel are used in balms to prevent infections. See I'm already learning. I bet I'll soon become one of the best healers around. Just wait and see."

I knew I was rambling and sputtering nonsensically but it did work a bit. The dwarves calmed down and Bofur even sported a small smirk. Still, Ori looked quite upset. I disentangled myself gently from Danà's arms and spread my arms in his direction.

"Oh, come here. I need a cuddle anyway…"

I smiled when he quickly embraced me. I could feel the tension ease away from the room. Then Ori spoke, eliciting laughs from everyone and even a soft chuckle from me.

"You know Amelia, dwarves don't cuddle…"

God, I loved these dwarves, I thought with a big smile on my face.

* * *

**A/N: Once again I want to thank you for the nice reviews and PM! It's amazing to feel such support for this little monster of a story. Thanks as well for the few people who added this story in their alerts and favorites! **

**So just a few notes about this chapter:**

**First I hope no one was offended/disturbed by mentions of violence and death. I really think the descriptions were light and vague enough. **

**Second, I have no medical knowledge whatsoever. The plants and their abilities cited here were found on two different websites. Obviously I am not encouraging anyone to try and chew on them! The information about honey is true, or at least various researches have demonstrated that it helped. **

**Third... How did you find angry Nori? Was the description to your liking? :) **

**I'll try and update the next chapter tomorrow. If I can't though, I want to let you know I don't know when the next update will be. Sometime next week, but it's highly probable I won't update any chapters on Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday.**


	8. A Nightmare before Midnight

**Everything belongs to Tolkien, except for my OC and the plot**

* * *

I was comfortably sitting in front of the hearth, almost disappearing in between the big cushions and with a warm cup of chamomile in my hands. Ori was back to his usual sweet self after our little cuddle and Dori was hovering over me like a mother hen. He had even decided to bake some small cookies, saying that food was the solution to every trouble.

I didn't want to contradict him. Anyway I was honestly not far from actually wholeheartedly agreeing with his philosophy. Besides, I was hungry.

Dori and Ori had basically clung on my arms during the whole walk back. On one side Ori would hold my elbow slightly, blabbering about little nothings, clearly attempting to make me forget about this whole event. It was sweet and I needed it so I talked lightly back with him. Though if I were entirely honest I didn't talk much and just let his voice lull me into a sense of familiarity and safety.

Dori was holding my other arm, supporting me. His second hand was hovering a few inches away of my back. It felt as if he was afraid I'd break at any moment. His worry and guilt were hurting me slightly but I couldn't do much at that moment except for letting him care for me wordlessly.

What worried me a bit though was Nori's gloomy face. The dwarf was always more silent, more discreet than the two others. But still even I could see that something was wrong. I could only hope he wasn't too angry with me.

During our walk back, he had been several steps behind and kept walking along the wall, noiselessly. I could feel his eyes on me though and every time I glanced above my shoulders I would meet his grey eyes immediately. His face was unreadable.

Now he sat in a chair on the other side of the room. He wasn't moving or saying anything as he stared at the fire burning high in the hearth. I wanted to speak with him, to apologize for this mess and make sure his anger wasn't directed at me. If it was, I would do anything I could to be forgiven. I had to talk to him, but it didn't feel right to do it while Ori was here.

Luckily, Dori called Ori for some help in the kitchen, leaving me alone with Nori. I remained silent for a few minutes before whispering, hoping the others wouldn't hear.

"I'm sorry. I'm truly sorry."

Nori sighed before rubbing his hand on his face tiredly. He left his spot at the opposite side of the room and sat on the floor not too far from me, leaning against the wall near the hearth. He had bent one of his legs and used it to support his left arm.

"You have nothing to feel sorry for' he sighed.

-Well, then what's wrong?" I softly asked.

He frowned some more. It was sort of funny really, to see his braided eyebrows move on his face. He almost looked cute with his grumpy pout.

"We told you already, about dwarves and how they protected the women."

He didn't say more and suddenly I understood. Damn I was slow. I could have slapped myself for my sluggish brain.

"Nori' I started 'You do realize that I'm fine and safe, right?"

He grunted and shrugged. Wow, it was worse than what I had thought.

"Nori' I said in a sing song voice 'Look at me."

I waited a while and seeing he didn't make a move, I decided to stand. I put the cup of chamomile on a small table and kneeled in front of him. I put my hand on either side of his face and forced him to look into my eyes. My fingers were skimming his cheekbones while my palms rested on his beautiful beard. I could see he was surprised by my gesture but I didn't care. I wanted him to understand.

"Oy, you stubborn dwarf. You listen to me. I. Am. Fine." I said as sternly as I could.

He lifted one of his hands to brush gently on my bruised cheek. His touch was too light to make me feel pain, but the care he took to make certain he wouldn't hurt me made my heart fill with warmth.

"You got hurt.' He whispered so low I wouldn't have heard it, hadn't all my attention been turned toward him.

-Really Nori, those men were brutes. They scared me is all. Really scared me I'll admit it. But think about it that way, now at least I'm aware such things could happen." I said in a soft voice.

I was startled by his sudden move as he grabbed my elbow, though he didn't hurt me at all. He then said in a very serious tone, his eyes turning hard, but clearly not intending to glare at me.

"That won't happen again. Amelia, I swear it won't if I can do anything about it."

My heart swelled some more at his words. I was used to silent support from my uncle and aunt, they would softly encourage me, usually wordlessly, with little gestures. No one had, in my memory at least, even been so serious about protecting and helping me. It was a strange thing to witness. I wasn't used to such…fierceness. I felt my cheeks warm a little. I didn't know whether I liked it or whether I should yell at him about feminism and genders equality.

Still, I answered as logically and softly as I could.

"You can't control the world and the people living in it Nori. What happened tonight was just an unfortunate event. Nothing more.

-You could have been hurt. You've been hurt.' He insisted stubbornly, a deep frown on his face.

-Yes, and you could have died trying to rescue me." I replied.

His derisive snort at that made me want to slap some sense in his stubborn head. I couldn't understand how he would be so protective about me and so carefree about his own safety. It annoyed me greatly.

"What' I said 'You think you're almighty? Are you made of stone and steel? No! You could have been hurt too, so stop your nonsense. And for the umpteenth time, I. Am. Fine!"

He sighed and finally nodded, though I could see his mood wasn't really good and he clearly wasn't convinced about my words. Sighing, I wondered what it would take to make these unhappy thoughts leave his mind. Ori had been easy to guess. Dori, well Dori needed quite obviously to take care of me in any way he could in order to reassure himself I was alright.

But what needed Nori to be cheered up? I skimmed through my memories with him. He was a cheeky, if extremely calm and silent person. He had gotten used to send me winks in the most inappropriate moments, and other moments too when I thought about it. He would often smirk, and sometimes chuckle but rarely laughed in earnest.

What could Nori need?

Then a silly idea crossed my mind. It was the only one I had so far.

I decided a little embarrassment on my part wouldn't be too much of a price to pay if it eased his worries a bit, so I decided to give this idea a try.

"Oh, I almost forgot.' I started as he looked at me questioningly 'I am going to ask your brother to braid my hair for me."

I could have laughed as he sputtered something unintelligible before standing up and adding with a wink.

"Well, what can I do, it's the King's orders after all…"

I grabbed my now lukewarm cup of chamomile and went to the kitchen.

Dori's grateful and concerned smile told me he had heard most of my discussion with Nori. Seriously, have dwarves magical ears or something of the sort? From his nod though I gathered I hadn't done anything inappropriate this time.

Sitting on the bench near the table, I looked at Dori's and Ori's antics in the kitchen and we were soon joined by Nori. I couldn't help but smirk at the slight pink tinge adorned on his cheeks.

He sat on the other side, sighing and holding his head with one of his hands. He looked tired. We were all waiting patiently for the cookies to bake when a thought came to the forefront of my mind.

"Maybe I should learn to fight.' I mumbled more to myself than anything.

'What?' 'Why would you do that?' 'No way!' were the three immediate answers I received.

-Well, in case anything like that happens again, I would at least be able to defend myself a bit' I reasoned.

-Nothing of the sort is going to happen.' Nori groaned.

-You can't know that.' I replied softly.

-You can't learn to fight just like that, Amelia. It isn't so easy. It's a lot of constant hard work.' Dori was frowning, displeased with the idea.

-I could do it.' I insisted

-But, you said you wanted to be a healer.' Ori softly added.

-Well, yes. But…

-You should concentrate on that. We will not let further harm comes to you. I promise. This was a mistake we won't make again. Don't you. Don't you feel safe? Here with us. Don't you feel safe at all?" Dori was frowning more than ever.

I understood then that he didn't interpret or see this like I did. For me learning self-defence was logical. Where I came from it was even common for women to learn at least some moves. It was a normal reaction after such events to want to learn to fight back.

But it evidently wasn't the same for them. For Dori, and probably Nori and Ori too, the fact that I wanted to learn such things just meant I didn't trust them. They were supposed to protect me. In their minds they had failed to do so. Asking for that right now probably hadn't been the best idea to have.

"Of course I feel safe when you're all around.' I answered earnestly 'But I just thought it would be a good idea. There is no other meaning behind it, I swear.

-Amelia, we're sorry to have let this happen.' Dori whispered.

-Dori' I sighed. 'I'm fine, really. Everything is fine now. Let's just. Let's forget about it all.' I said forcing a smile to my lips. 'So, when would those cookies be ready? I'm starving and I can't wait to have some!"

None of us discussed the events of that day anymore. We were all clearly attempting to put it behind us. Still, their guilt over something that hadn't been their fault was annoying me. I didn't want them to feel that way.

Little by little, Ori and myself started to talk about various topics that were all as unrelated to what happened as possible. Before long we were chuckling together and had improvised a dinner of sort with various cold meats, cheese, honey and bread.

Life here wasn't so bad, I thought a bit later while munching on some delicious cookies freshly baked.

* * *

The following day I didn't wake before midday and I was a bit ashamed to have slept for so long. Listening intently as I put on my clothes, I realized that the house was way too silent for dwarves to be here.

I stepped noiselessly into the kitchen and grabbed one of the leftover cookies, well, the only leftover cookie actually. Damn these men and their appetites. I suddenly felt that there would be quite a lot of fights in the future when food was concerned.

I went to the living room and found it empty too. Humming to myself I slowly looked around. I had this hunch that if I were to simply leave the house, the three brothers would have a fit, especially if they were to come back to empty rooms. Yet I didn't feel like staying alone here.

I hummed some more, pondering on my options.

What could I do?

From this house I knew how to go to the seamstresses, maybe, and I was quite certain of the way to the healing wards.

Thinking back about the maze of corridors and stairs though, I wasn't too sure of myself. I didn't want to upset or annoy the brothers who had clearly been bothered by my disappearance the previous day.

Left alone to my own devices I had plenty of time to think about way too many depressing topics. I sat forlornly in one of the comfortable chair, facing the empty hearth. I hadn't put any candles in the room and the only light came through one of the openings in the kitchen that was carved in the mountainside.

There was no view, as it wasn't exactly a window but more a sort of long and very narrow tunnel that went horizontally to the outside, allowing both light and fresh air to come in when wooden shutters inside where open. I had one of those in my room and could only guess the brothers had them too.

The dim light in the living room didn't help me escape my gloomy thoughts. My mind turned once more to my family and I was wondering whether I would ever go back there. I was feeling extremely guilty.

Of course I hadn't chosen to come here, but I still enjoyed it, mostly. I was growing to really care about Dori, Nori and Ori who had welcomed me in their home with open arms. They were so attentive about me, all of them.

Dori and his mother hen issues was the most obvious. Ori and his insatiable curiosity and sweet smile seemed to always be ready to provide an attentive ear when I felt like speaking of home. Even Nori in his own silent, borderline gruff way was quite evidently interested in my well being; his overreaction to my failed kidnapping being quite the sign.

I had been genuinely surprised and moved when I had seen all the dwarves coming to my rescue. Their presence in the ward had been another indication of their care. Even Balin, whom I barely knew, had been there and quite concerned.

It was shocking to see that they managed quite easily to make me forget about home. And there lay my problem. From time to time I was starting to forget and it was an awful thing to realize.

The shame and guilt that riddled me were suffocating, yet Nori's wink, Bofur's laugh and Dori's or Ori's smiles managed to wipe those feelings away damn easily. It probably shouldn't surprise me that they would come back with a vengeance when the dwarves weren't there to distract me.

Feeling suddenly cold I brought my knees to my chest. My feet were bare and the hem of the long dress came to brush on my toes, I absentmindedly played with it with one hand while the other circled my legs.

I was deeply thinking when the front door opened, but I only realized it when a hand gently brushed my shoulder. Startled I looked up to see Ori's worried face, with Dori not too far behind. Nori though, was absent.

"Are you alright Amelia?

-I'm fine Ori. I was just…I was thinking of home."

They nodded and Dori went to light a fire while Ori sat in a chair nearby.

"It's perfectly normal to miss you home; you shouldn't feel ashamed of it.' Dori said softly

-That's not the problem.' I whispered

-What do you mean?' The ever curious Ori wondered.

-I feel like I don't miss it enough. When' I tried to say but had to stop to gather my thoughts. 'When I'm with you all I don't miss it much…"

I didn't expect them to understand. If anything I thought they would feel disgusted by my lack of feelings for my home. From what I had gathered in about two weeks with them, it was that the notion of home was really, really important for dwarves. Especially for those dwarves who had been kicked out of it by an angry dragon; all in all that meant almost everybody here as far as I knew.

There was a long silence before Dori asked, or rather ordered, Ori to go prepare some tea. Ori grumbled but did as he was told, I did hear a distinct 'dwarves don't drink tea' in between his grumpy mumbles but chose not to comment. Was Dori considered an oddity for a dwarf? I wondered.

As soon as we were alone together Dori took a deep breath and spoke quite simply.

"There might never be a way for you to go back home Amelia, you know that, right?

-Of course I do.' I answered, pained to hear it stated aloud by someone else than me.

-It is highly possible that you would have to stay here permanently.

-I know Dori!

-Whatever family you had, you'll never see again.' He continued in a calm, even voice.

-I know that…'

-You are alone in this world for no one knows where you come from or how to go back.

-For god's sake Dori I know all that!' I snapped, disbelieving of his sudden blunt cruelty.

-Then don't you know it's perfectly natural and sane even, for you to unconsciously adapt to life here and build new bonds with people? They might not be your family by blood, but they can and will become your kin, if you let them and allow yourself to do so that is.

-I … what?

-Amelia, I cannot say I understand what you're going through. I'm not wise or knowledgeable about such things. But I know that you can't survive here if you don't move on and accept your situation and what it entails."

I pondered on his words. My heart was beating loudly against my ribcage, and it was almost painful. I could feel tears gather in my eyes and I hated myself for being such a cry-baby.

"But…isn't accepting this situation the same as giving up? I haven't even looked for a way back. I didn't have the possibility to say goodbye. I didn't have a choice.' I choked

-Allowing yourself to have a real life here isn't giving up. It's the opposite. Living in our world will, from what I understood and guessed, be really hard for you. You'll have to fight, not with your fists but with yourself, learning new ways and most importantly learning to let the pain go.

-You're telling me to forget about them…

-No, I'm telling you to keep them in your heart but to move on with your life. You might never see them again, yet you might as well one day disappear once more.

-Then wouldn't creating bonds here just hurt me more if I were to disappear?"

We stayed silent for awhile, I was staring at the fire and I guessed he was staring at me. It was Ori, who had silently come back, who broke the silence.

"You said you had no choices.

-Because I haven't.

-Well maybe you had no choice in coming here, but then again now you have a choice to make."

I looked at him with a frown. I didn't understand what he meant by that.

"You have three choices I can think of.' He said before counting on his fingers 'First, you can choose to spend your whole time here looking for a way back to your home, knowing perfectly that you might never find one, you will probably always feel lonely, hurt and guilty. Second, you can stay here and never allow yourself to forget, feeling guilty each time you enjoy yourself and sad each time you don't."

I felt a slight blush creeping on my cheeks. It was somehow how I had felt these past days, even weeks. Ori continued though, not paying attention to my embarrassment.

"And third you can choose to live your life here fully, as if you were here to stay and if the day come you have the possibility to go back, then you'd be able to make a choice based on both your experiences. And if you're cast away, then at least you wouldn't regret anything because you'd have chosen to live. There is no painless option for you though, you'll have to grieve one way or another for one of the two worlds you know and the people in it."

I nodded at him, acknowledging I had listened. It felt slightly odd to hear Ori being so serious and so matter-of-factly. Yet I knew perfectly well that the youngest brother wasn't some child. He was more than 90 years old after all. I shouldn't be surprised if he proved to be wise too.

Ori turned back to a small tray he had set on a table nearby and he handed me a warm cup of tea before handing a second one to Dori. He then went back to the kitchen and came back with another huge tray filled with food. We were going to have lunch here it seemed.

"Thanks. Aren't you drinking with us?' I asked after he came back.

-Dwarves don't drink tea." He muttered.

I smiled when I saw Dori roll his eyes.

"Then what are they supposed to drink?' I smiled.

-Ale of course!"

I startled when I heard Nori's voice. I hadn't seen him come in. He put a small leather bag on the floor and I saw Dori frown while looking at his younger brother. He muttered something that sounded like 'shameful' but I couldn't be sure. Nori had simply shrugged and pointedly avoided to look at his older brother.

Dori was looking at his brother with hard eyes, the like of which I had never seen yet on the old dwarf's face. Nori's eyes were strangely empty of emotion, his features were blank. It oddly disturbed me not to see the usual playful glint in the grey eyes and the small, almost non-existent smirk in the corner of his mouth.

I didn't particularly feel like asking what was happening though and I wanted to keep the discussion as light as possible. Ori seemed to need to be cheered up quite quickly for his face looked sadder at every passing minute.

"Then I'm glad I'm not a dwarf.' I said with a theatrical sigh.

-Why is that?' Ori asked, apparently eager as well to keep the discussion away from Nori and Dori's obvious discord.

-Well I believe I can say that…I hate ale.

-What?' Ori looked at me with wide eyes. 'How can you?

-It's way too bitter. I really can't get used to the taste. Do you think it'll be a terrible affliction around here?' I asked with a frightened expression on my face.

-Most certainly!" he answered with a serious nod.

We managed to stay serious for a few more seconds before we both started to laugh quite loudly. Dori and Nori didn't participate and I could see both of them shaking their heads. They looked at us in a way that clearly said both Ori and I were definitely young and silly.

I didn't care and apparently Ori didn't either.

Our laughs calmed down quickly though and we started to seriously discuss dwarves drinking habits. I still believe they're borderline alcoholics…

We spent the whole afternoon together, laughing, eating and drinking. I had never experienced anything even remotely close to this. I was surprised too that they didn't have anything to do, no jobs to go to, but Dori told me grumpily they could take a day to spend with their ward whenever they wanted.

Balin came by, and stayed for dinner. The older dwarf was annoyed at himself and deeply apologized for having waited too long before braiding my hair. He was a very calm person, very wise in a way. I enjoyed immediately his peaceful presence and we finally got some time to get better acquainted.

He then found out about the details of my arrival here and how I had felt in Bienne. All in all it felt as if I had just met a very old uncle, or even a grandfather. Balin was a good listener, but different than Ori. Balin was paying attention but wouldn't ask questions, simply patting my hand to reassure me and offering his opinion with a warm smile.

I immediately came to trust him.

Anyway, he looked like a short version of Santa and who wouldn't trust Santa?

The evening was quite uneventful, especially after Balin left, but I could easily sense a tension between Dori and Nori and nothing I said, mostly silly jokes, had any effects. I was slightly offended to obtain no reaction from them whatsoever but mostly I was worried because I had no idea what had caused the apparently sudden rift between them.

I stood up and decided to leave them alone a bit. As I was slowly walking in the kitchen toward the corridor, I could only hear a few rushed words spoken angrily.

"What have you done this time? Where did you go?

-Don't ask if you don't want to know the answer.

-Ori, go to bed! Think about the example you set, Nori! Ma would be so ashamed…"

I frowned deeply. I hadn't meant to eavesdrop but their voices travelled quite easily in the silence of the apartment. I wondered what it was that Nori did, but I knew I'd never dare to ask either of the brothers.

* * *

Slightly put out by the three brothers' mood I quickly retired to my room. The previous night I had slept like a log, too exhausted to think about anything. Tonight though was bound to be different.

As I lay in the complete darkness, my thoughts involuntarily went back to the previous day's events. At first I was simply thinking about it in a cold, analytical way. I was just recalling the events in a sort of morbid and clinical fashion.

Little by little the darkness became suffocating and oppressing. My mind started to play tricks on me, letting me hear whispers when there was none. At some point I was almost convinced that the dwarves had made a mistake, that the men were still alive and had come to take me away.

It was all very silly and I knew it. The logical part of my brain was yelling at me that it wasn't possible, that I was perfectly safe here and those men were dead. But another, weirdly stronger part of my mind was whispering about possibilities and what ifs.

What if they weren't dead just hurt?

What if they now wanted to take their revenge?

What if they had friends who had witnessed the events and now wanted to kill the dwarves and me?

And then my mind took a tangent, thinking about what could have happened. And even if I knew it didn't, it still terrified me to think about those possibilities.

What if they had killed me?

What if the dwarves had been too late?

What if the dwarves hadn't bothered to come?

What if the men hadn't been hungry for food first? What if they had…

I shut my eyes, praying for sleep to come and take me. It did take me, but only after probably some hours spent with these nerves wrecking thoughts. At first I fell into a calm and finally peaceful slumber.

But then the nightmares started.

I was reliving all the previous day's events, re-enacting all of it. Yet some parts soon changed and the scary events turned morbid and truly frightening in a way only nightmares can. Gruesome details appeared in front of my eyes as the battle's outcome turned for the worst. Suffice is to say that in my nightmare, the dwarves didn't prevail.

I could see them lying cold on the ground while the men snickered and laughed. I could feel their blood on my face, under my hands.

Nori's grey eyes were wide open and stared back unseeingly into my green, terrified eyes.

And then I felt the men's hands on me as they threw me on the ground next to my friends' corpses.

I swear I could feel their hands.

Contrarily to what had happened in reality I did yell in my dreams. I yelled to the point I broke my voice. I screamed and shrieked, trying to fight them, digging my nails in the bloodied mud in order to crawl away from them, pushing them and their dirty hands away from me.

But I wasn't strong enough.

* * *

I was screaming, tossing and turning in my bed, fighting against the blanket that hindered my move when the three brothers burst into my room. Nori was the first one in and consequently the first one to arrive next to me. He quickly gathered me in his arms and managed to awaken me.

At first I was completely lost and I looked around wildly, trying to catch my breath. I even fought against Nori's hold on me before I realized it was him, not one of the men, who had me in his arms.

I was shaking and freezing. I could feel that my back was damp with cold sweat and my cheeks were probably wet with fallen tears. I was completely entangled in my sheets, which was a clear sign that I had struggled for quite some time in my bed.

Nori's hold was tight and oddly heartening. I let my head fall on his shoulder in a strangely familiar way; weird, it wasn't as if it was usual for him to hold me like this. He was silently rubbing my back, then caressing my hair, then rubbing my back some more. His presence calmed me little by little.

Ori had lighted the small candle on my bedside before disappearing behind Dori, back in the dark corridor.

While it was just the two of us, Nori softly started to hum a tune which surprisingly soothed me quickly. I wasn't clutching at his tunic anymore and my arms had slowly, unconsciously, encircled his waist. I was glad he let me hold him back.

Dori came back with a steaming cup and was followed by Ori who was holding warm looking blankets.

"Here" Dori said in a murmur, putting the cup on the bedside table before taking one of the blankets and covering my shoulders with it.

Nori had to relinquish his hold on me to wrap me in the warm cover. I apparently pulled a face at the sudden absence of his arms for he sat more comfortably on the bed, his back against the wall, and quickly gathered me in his arms, sitting me across his lap.

Dori handed me the cup then, while Ori sat next to us. I was genuinely happy to see the now familiar chamomile and I drank it silently. After I was done, probably around ten minutes later, Dori produced from one of his pocket a small vial.

He sat on the bed next to me and uncorked it. A strong, easily recognizable smell reached my nose.

Lavender.

I closed my eyes, startling a little when I felt Dori's hands on my temples, gently rubbing some lavender essence on my skin. He quickly corked the bottle back and stood up. This little massage had an almost immediate effect; I was feeling much calmer already, but the fear and unease hadn't yet left me.

"She needs calm.' Nori softly whispered.

-Aye. Call if there's something else.' Dori answered just as lowly.

-Aye"

Dori simply nodded and then silently exited the room. I don't know whether he gestured to Ori to follow him or not, but I soon heard the soft click of the door being closed and I was left in Nori's reassuring hold.

I should have been embarrassed I guess, to be behaving and consequently treated like a child by these men. Yet at that moment I only felt grateful for their help. I also had this entirely new feeling of being completely safe and I wondered briefly what was causing it exactly.

I didn't ponder too much on it though.

After awhile I felt like I should talk, explain myself, and Nori's silent presence was warm, strong and protective, letting me feel safe enough to voice my fears.

"I saw them. I heard them in my head." I whispered.

His arms tightened slightly around me and I felt his jaw clench against my right temple.

"I saw the battle and you were all dead…' I kept on explaining and he stayed silent 'I could feel your blood flowing around me and they were laughing. And then…"

I cleared the lump in my throat as fresh tears menaced to fall

"And then they were…' I choked unable to voice such things.

Closing my eyes I pressed my face in the crook of his neck, in his beard while his arms strengthened their hold some more, encircling me and pressing me strongly against his chest.

"They can't harm you anymore.' He whispered in my hair. 'We're all alive and well."

I knew he probably had no idea what to do or how to comfort a scared cry-baby like I was being, but his simple words were strangely enough for me. I wasn't silly enough to believe his whispered words would suddenly make me forget everything, and I fully expected to experience some more nightmares in the future, but for the present time it was enough.

It was more than enough actually for his very presence, when I most needed someone to be here, was something I wouldn't forget about.

The warm blanket provided by Ori and the soothing chamomile of Dori had the expected effects too and I felt most grateful for the three kind brothers.

Soon I felt peaceful and was lulled into a calm state. Feeling entirely safe I started to softly speak with Nori about my home, my world and he mostly listened only asking questions from time to time. I mostly spoke of my uncle and aunt, of the little habits and quirks they had, of how we used to wake up late on Sundays to have a late brunch all together while watching old movies. I had to explain what movies were, of course, but it didn't bother me. Nori seemed genuinely curious about me, even though he didn't display it as enthusiastically as Ori did.

He told me a bit about them too. Explaining in details how cute Ori was when he was a child, how he pouted when he didn't receive enough ink and parchment for his taste, how he would spend his childhood hidden behind books and parchments. He then told me about Dori's protective issues and how he had loudly interrupted Ori's very first training session in combat because he had deemed the instructor to be too violent. Nori had apparently laughed, sitting on the side, with Ori pouting next to him while Dori and the instructor had fought together.

My fears had entirely disappeared by then and I asked a bit more about him. He seemed to hesitate before remembering a story with Bombur, Bofur and himself when they were children. They had tried to sneak in the other two's kitchen in order to try and find where their mother hid the cookies. Bombur's incredible sense of smell, he told me, allowed them to discover the hiding place but not quickly enough for them to avoid getting caught by Bofur's and Bombur's mother.

* * *

At some point I must have fallen asleep for I opened my eyes much later. I was lying on my bed, tucked into the warm blankets. Slowly I sat on the bed awakened by something I couldn't quite place, rubbing my eyes with both my hands.

"You should sleep some more, it isn't dawn yet."

I hadn't realized that Nori was still there. Actually he was just next to the door and I guessed that it was his leaving that had awoken me. Registering the information he just gave me I simply shrugged.

"I'm awake now. There's no point in going back to sleep.' I yawned and I could have bet he smirked 'Unless you're going to tell me that dwarves don't wake up early…" I added as an afterthought.

To my pleased surprise he chuckled softly and shook his head.

"No, actually dwarves' day start early. Dori and Ori are already readying breakfast.

-Great!' I stirred and stood up 'Then let's go."

I was ready to follow him to the kitchen when his eyes went slightly wider and he turned away from me. Clearing his throat he simply added.

"You might want to put some clothes before wandering around."

I looked at what I was wearing. It was a long cotton shirt that reached the middle of my calves and something I would have easily called a grandmother's nightgown. It actually was one of Ori's longest shirts he had lent me while the seamstresses were working on my clothes. He couldn't actually be serious; the thing was ugly and hid everything that could have been perceived indecent to show.

I rolled my eyes and sighed

"You can't be serious. Don't tell me you call that stuff inappropriate. Besides, you saw me like this already."

He glanced at me, one eyebrow raised to his hairline.

"It is entirely different. I didn't plan on seeing you like this. Are you telling me it is perfectly normal where you come from to parade in front of males in your underwear? If so, you come from a very welcoming world…"

Well, when he put it like this…

"I'll change and come soon.

-I thought so too."

I could see his self-satisfied smirk, his previous embarrassment at seeing me like this completely forgotten and I felt the urge to tease him some. Well I couldn't exactly let him win each time now, could I?

Thus I used the fact that he was quite obviously savouring his little victory and taking his sweet time to leave against him.

"Well" I said crossing my arms on my chest and sending him a questioning glance.

He looked at me, curious, and clearly waited for me to continue. I smirked slowly before continuing.

"Is it customary for dwarves to wait in the room when a lady changes? If so I hope you'll enjoy the show."

I couldn't have hoped for a better reaction. His cheeks quickly coloured, taking a vivid red tinge, and he almost ran away from my room. I laughed at his antics while I changed, still wearing one of the 'human' dresses bought by Dori. I couldn't believe how easy it was to make him blush.

Apparently the simple fact that a 'lady' would talk about certain things, even vaguely, would be entirely inappropriate and would embarrass them. I didn't know if it was only the three brothers or the dwarves in general.

Truthfully, these kinds of light teasing were entirely new to me. I wasn't used to joke around and speak lightly about such topics. In that aspect, I had always been more discreet and shy, like the dwarves appeared to be when a lady was in the room. Still I couldn't lie, I had enjoyed the feeling that had come from our little banter.

Life here was going to be fun.

Glancing around in my room I took the now empty cup that Dori had brought the previous day. Remembering the events of the night put a damper on my mood. I had never been one to experience many nightmares, even as a child, and I could honestly said I didn't know what to expect for the nights to come.

I was fairly sure that it wasn't over, simply thinking back about Deathgrip and his other nameless friends made me shudder in horror and I was quite certain that each night would bring back creepy memories that would play tricks on my mind.

I shook my head, as if to clear those thoughts away, and then opened the door.

After just one step I heard the easily recognizable laugh that belonged to the one and only Bofur. I smiled, walking to the kitchen, silently thanking Nori for his fashion advices.

Yet I would never tell him that aloud.

* * *

**A/N: Thanks to the reviewers and every kind person who read and follow this story. It means a lot to know my 'work' is appreciated! **

**I hope you enjoyed this chapter. I wanted to portray Ori in a more adult perspective, I hope I managed to do so properly.**

**And we see yet another side of Nori :) I hope it wasn't too cheesy...**

**I don't know when I'll be able to update next. Sometime during the week, no later than next weekend.**


	9. The Healer's Apprentice

**I do not own anything except for my OC and the plot.**

* * *

Breakfast had been a cheerful moment and what remnants of nightmare still lingered in my mind quickly disappeared.

After coming in the room I had been warmly welcomed by the smiling faces of Bofur, and surprisingly Bombur and Bifur. Dori quickly came to hover around me but I reassured him with a smile.

The nightmare had shaken me but I was truly fine that morning. I thanked both him and Ori with a short hug, which resulted in Ori's face to become bright red and Bofur to have a laugh fit at the sight. Sometimes I truly wondered when, if ever, that dwarf didn't laugh.

After greeting Bofur, Bifur and Bombur, I winked at Nori and remembering his words about my previous attire, I just couldn't resist adding.

"Fancy seeing you here.' I told Bofur 'I have always liked to have friends visiting without notice; you should come more often, in my world we're so welcoming to everyone…"

Nori choked on whatever it was, he had been drinking and Dori sent me a questioning glance, as did the others. I pulled on my best innocent face and sat next to Ori while Bofur was mocking Nori's apparent inability to drink properly. Bombur laughed heartily and seeing his joyous round face made me incredibly joyous too.

"You know, where I come from, older people sometimes need help to drink and eat. Maybe I should change my profession, you're all so old, you're bound to need me." I told in Bofur's direction.

His reaction didn't disappoint me for he laughed heartily while Nori sent me a glare, which disappeared quickly as he playfully winked at me. I smiled at him. I was happy I had guessed right; Nori enjoyed teasing.

The breakfast soon transformed into a weird food fight after Bofur sent a playful jab at Nori who answered by throwing a piece of cake right on Bofur's nose. I thought Dori would say something, but he simply kept on eating while Bofur, Bombur and Nori fought. Ori tried to join in the battle but Dori immediately ordered him to 'sit down and eat'.

Had I truly once believed that cleaning after these men wouldn't be too difficult?

I looked at a piece of honeyed bread that was stuck on the ceiling with wide eyes. How would I reach it?

After they calmed down, they heartily devoured what was left of food. I was once again impressed by the sheer quantity of food these men were able to eat in a short time span.

Dwarves truly never ceased to amaze me.

And let's just say that their table manners didn't amaze me in a good way.

I chose not to despair on that piece of bread stuck on the ceiling; it would come down at some point, right? Concentrating on more pressing matters, I chose to ask Dori whether it would be alright for me to go meet with Oin that morning. I really didn't want to spend a whole day alone here and I was genuinely curious about what medical knowledge they had in this place. From what I could gather it relied mostly on medicinal plants, thus indicating it might be a rather primitive kind of knowledge. Still, I had to admit that their ointments had been efficient on my wounds and bruises.

"Well, before I show you the way there, we'll need to stop by Balin's' Dori answered before adding 'We need to finalize our accord after all."

He didn't need to say more for I clearly remembered the King's words.

I was to receive my first dwarvish braid.

In all honesty I was curious about that too. They made it sound as if it was a major event so I was wondering whether there'd be some special decorum. Truly that would be awkward. Having two older men, or dwarves, braiding my hair already sounded strange enough and I really hoped it wouldn't entail speeches or any weird traditions.

The very thought of them braiding my hair brought pictures of girly pyjamas-parties and I had to shake my head to free it of such ideas. It wouldn't do to burst in laughter when they'd braid my hair.

I gingerly followed after Dori in a maze of corridors until we stopped at a small wooden door that was slightly decorated with carvings. Dori was the one to knock and we didn't have to wait long before Balin, with his prettily kept white beard and his warm smile, opened the door.

"Oh, here you are!' he said as a welcome before gesturing us in.

-Aye. Did you manage to find some?

-Yes, yes. There were quite a lot of them so it wasn't too difficult.

-Did they found a vein?' Dori sounded hopeful

-Sadly not. Just a few crystals, but enough to make beads and even a few items we'll sell at the market."

I really tried to follow their discussion, but I seriously didn't understand what it was they were talking about. I discreetly looked around to find a room really similar to the three brothers' living room. I was slightly curious about the general lack of decoration and hoped I'll remember to ask Ori about it.

From what I had seen the halls were beautifully decorated, but the inside of the corridors were quite bare, as were Dori's house and now Balin's. The corridors actually looked raw sometimes, as if the natural tunnels had been left in their natural states. Yet that didn't mean the rooms weren't comfortable, as I had previously noted, the abundance of cushions and plush carpets made it especially cosy.

Here too there was a large hearth though no fire burnt at the time and there were various chairs and wooden equipments such as cabinets and wardrobes.

I absentmindedly followed Balin and Dori to the kitchen but as they went through a back door, still talking, I stopped dead in my track. I found myself in front of a very intimidating bald man that was staring at me in a very intense and scary way.

Being here, he was quite obviously a dwarf, but he was taller than those I had met, except maybe for the King. I looked at his numerous tattoos and well kept moustache as he sat at the table and ate his breakfast.

When he glanced at me I swear I felt myself shrunk on the spot. This dwarf seemed to be as stern as the King had been and I felt like a lost child. It was quite impressive to observe that by their mere presence some of the dwarves made me feel decades younger. I didn't appreciate the feeling.

His eyes narrowed at me before he said in a grave voice, adding a nod at the end.

"Dwalin, at your service.

-Amelia, at…yours." I answered like an automat.

He grunted and went back to his food without much ceremony and we kept silent.

I kept glancing at him and soon realized he was observing me too while eating a huge amount of food. Did this dwarf ever smile? It didn't feel like he would. I was starting to feel fidgety but was trying hard not to move at all.

I was grateful when Dori and Balin remembered my presence and came back toward me. I had felt very foolish standing up like this while Dwalin ate but I couldn't muster enough courage to talk to him.

"Here my dear, come and sit.' Balin told me while taking me by the elbow and guiding me to the bench in front of Dwalin.

-Hem, shall I do something special?' I asked Dori to try and avoid Dwalin's watchful gaze

-No, you really have nothing to do." The dwarf simply answered.

I wanted him to elaborate but he quite evidently didn't catch on that. To my surprise, Dwalin's voice resonated in the room while Balin and Dori were muttering about one thing or another together.

"They're discussing about what braid to give you." He said gruffly.

I glanced at him and felt finally brave enough to ask.

"So what's going to happen?

-They didn't explain?' Came his abrupt answer while he drank from a large tankard

-Nope."

I received another grunt from the bald dwarf. He let his tankard clack loudly on the table and looked at me silently for a second. Inside I was imagining myself running away screaming loudly. I stayed immobile and silent though, meeting his eyes without a single blink. I was quite proud of my newfound acting skills.

"They're just going to take a few strands of hair from behind your ear and braid it. They'll use three beads; two made of amethyst to represent your two guardians, and a smaller one made of blue stone to represent your welcomed status within Thorin's Halls."

I nodded, suddenly forgetting about Dwalin being scary when my natural curiosity became stronger than my uneasiness.

"Is there a particular reason for the amethyst? I guess the blue stone is used because it's the colour of the mountain's rock. But what about the amethyst?

-Amethyst is the stone we use to express protection.

-Protection?' I didn't really understand what he meant.

-Aye. By braiding it into your hair, Balin and Dori put you under their direct protection and accept their status as guardians."

I nodded but didn't have the time to ask more question as Balin and Dori finally came back. At the same time Dwalin stood up and left without a word. I really couldn't tell what he thought of me, I couldn't even be sure he actually thought anything of me. For all I knew I might simply be too insignificant for him to care, but I had a hunch it wasn't the case. He did take some time to explain a few things to me after all.

"So, you don't need to do anything. Just sit and wait, it won't take long." Balin said while selecting and dividing some of my hair from behind my left ear into three equal strands.

He braided them a little before threading a small amethyst bead onto the middle strand. He then stood up, letting Dori take his place and continue with the braiding. Once more, after a few centimetres, Dori threaded the bead onto the middle strand. Then he finished to braid my hair and attached the end of it with a thin leather string on which a blue stone had been stringed.

"Luckily I have long hair." I said with a smile.

I couldn't resist touching my new hairdo. The blue and purple of the stone and amethyst were quite beautiful on my brownish hair, or at least I liked how it looked. My long hair was light brown overall, but with darker and lighter streaks here and there which gave a weird rather undefined colour for it changed and varied depending of the sun and light between really dark blonde and brown.

I always had envied people with jet black hairs. There wasn't any real reason and my aunt used to say that no woman was ever entirely happy about her hair. But that day, for the first time in awhile, maybe ever, I really found my hair to be pretty with the three stones threaded in it.

I simply felt happy.

I offered both Dori and Balin an enormous and cheerful smile and they kindly smiled back.

"Thank you, both of you." I said, earning a simple 'Don't mention it' from Balin and 'Stop thanking me all the time' from Dori which made me chuckle.

"Shall I show you to the healing ward?" Dori asked me then and I nodded energetically for I was quite eager and impatient to go there.

* * *

One hour or so later I was standing in front of Oin, waiting for him to state what an apprenticeship actually entailed here.

The old looking dwarf seemed quite nice but appeared to be almost completely deaf. That could become slightly annoying I mused as I had to repeat for the fourth time that I would like to train here. Not to paint, not feeling faint, and no it didn't rain. I wanted to train. I didn't even understand how he could mishear me quite so badly. The weirdest part being that, when he finally heard, he simply stated that he already knew that.

I had the feeling being his apprentice would be both exhausting and fun.

Soon though, Oin showed me around the ward. He pointed at the tools and where they were placed and explained once more that all the water I'll found in copper vases would have already been boiled. We moved between three different rooms, two of which had beds aligned along one wall. He then showed me the cabinets containing already made balm, ointments and medicines before guiding me toward a last room in the back where I found impressive quantities of varied unprepared plants.

I realized before long that a large part of what I had learnt already wouldn't be useful here, at all. What was the point in knowing about molecules, ECGs, and so many other things that were directly linked with technology? Here there was no possibility to do a simple blood analysis, no way to perform X-rays. They didn't even have aspirin.

Yet I couldn't find it in me to be truly disappointed or annoyed. If anything it felt incredibly thrilling to have so many new things to learn. I'll have to relearn all the gestures to do to check on someone's health, how illnesses were treated, everything. Somehow with the prospect of having to relearn everything from scratch, my early passion was renewed and I felt impossibly motivated.

In my mind, I had the impression I had been offered a real second chance. Here I could start my life anew. Really and completely.

My enthusiasm obviously pleased Oin but he calmed me wisely, saying I should first learn to recognize the plants and their aspects, both normal and dried. The program was quite simple and logical really, I would have to first be taught to recognize the plants, and then associate each plant with its effects. After awhile I would move on to the preparation of balm and ointments.

All the while, Oin said, I would assist him with the few patients we'd have.

I quickly found out that dwarves were hardly sick and had impressive healing capacities. It explained why so few dwarves would choose to learn about healing; they simply didn't need it. Yet we had patients every day; even though they were rarely ill, dwarves were short tempered and had a hard life. We treated mostly bruises, cuts and other similar injuries, resulting from fights, training or work.

At the same time I found out that Oin was actually one of the only two dwarves in the Halls who had an extensive knowledge of plants and healing process. All of them apparently knew the basics, just like everyone back home knew what to take for curing a simple headache. So there was only one other dwarf who had a real understanding of the more complicated healing processes. And now here I was.

From that first day onwards I spent all my days at the healing ward with Oin.

I would wake up early in the morning, usually thanks to Dori or Ori who would come and knock at my door. Then I would have breakfast with whichever of the brothers was there at the time and then I'd walk to the ward and spend almost my whole day there, having lunch with Oin, and sometimes Danà who'd come to visit me.

The second healer hadn't come in at all since I had been there and Oin had simply vaguely told me she only came when she was needed and that she usually worked elsewhere. It did make sense, most of the time Oin didn't have many patients so we had a lot of time to simply concentrate on my training.

From time to time I'll remember my discussion with the three brothers about weapon training. Seeing all those black and blue dwarves wasn't really motivating and to be honest I didn't need to learn how to fight when all I did was staying in the Halls. Besides, my days were busy and the little free time I had, I didn't want to spend it receiving bruises.

In the late afternoon I'd usually go back to the brothers' house, often stopping at the market first to buy food; that is meat in huge quantities. I often was the first back home and once there I would honour my part of the contract and clean the house and start preparing diner. And that brought quite a lot of troubles to the dwarves.

* * *

One afternoon, I remember particularly well, I had been happy to find some black pudding in between two pieces of hams. I couldn't resist buying it, I wanted to try and reproduce my aunt's recipe. Going to the vegetables stands I was greeted warmly by the dwarf lady who had gotten used to see me around.

That evening, Bofur and Bombur came by and I was glad I had prepared enough of my dish to feed an entire regiment…or five dwarves and a tiny human. They were all waiting as noiselessly as dwarves could be and I served my dish proudly.

"Black pudding! It's been awhile since we had some!' Ori happily exclaimed before paling slightly and taking a closer look at his plate.

-What's…this?" Bofur asked, glancing at Dori and Nori.

Dori and Nori exchanged a look that clearly said "she did it again…" Seeing as the dwarves were suddenly silent I looked at them, once more slightly disappointed in their lack of enthusiasm in regards of my cooking.

"It's just black pudding and apple.' I sighed while sitting next to Nori.

-Apples?' Bombur at least seemed curious.

-Why…why would you do that?" Ori stammered forlornly.

I looked at Nori who seemed to see how disappointed I was. In reaction he quickly tasted my dish and said quickly.

"It's delicious…really nice. Awesome cooking Amelia. Wonderful, really."

I smiled at him. Nori always seemed ready to be nice and sweet with me. I wouldn't lie, I was grateful, even though I knew it was all lies.

Quickly Dori, and Bofur followed suit and complimented my dish, though they clearly didn't appreciate it nearly as much as what they said. Bombur was the only one who really seemed to enjoy it actually and it apparently scared his brother.

"Ori, try it. It's good. It's different, but good.

-It's apple…with black pudding…"

I sighed. Obviously, for Ori's sake, I'll have to try and tune down my habit to mix tastes and to cook vegetables and fruits.

Nori discreetly patted my shoulder and I turned to face him. His face showed he felt sorry and concerned at my reaction. I smiled at him, letting him know I wouldn't let such a thing bring me down for long.

After that event I did try to avoid cooking as much vegetables, but I just couldn't forgo them completely. In the end, we all made compromises and more often than once, I prepared vegetables for me and exclusively meat for them. I was extremely pleased though, each time Nori would insist to try my veggie dishes. It was obviously costing him, and each time I would thank him with warm smiles. When I said he was nice, I didn't lie.

Even Dori tried to eat some vegetables from time to time.

* * *

All in all my days were full and I came to really appreciate the time in the evenings, when we'll just sit in the living room. Nori and Dori would light their pipes and smoke, while Ori and I would discuss about one topic or another. More often than not other dwarves came to visit us, especially Bofur, Bifur and Bombur and the evenings were always spent in laughter with them.

Bofur, I discovered, was a great musician, as were almost all of them really. Their merry songs would lull me to peaceful slumbers as I'd witness them dancing and laughing around the living room, that is, when I didn't join in the merriment.

The only thing I would have done gladly without were the nightmares that still plagued me. Even though they had slowly started to ease away, I couldn't count the number of times I had awoken in Nori's or Dori's arms. Yet it didn't bring my mood down.

Each time I would awaken because of my fears, the three brothers would sooth me and Nori would spend hours with me, listening to my blabber about what was once my home. Sometimes, we wouldn't even speak and he'd just hold me close to him. Little by little, I realized some time later, those talks helped me to accept the loss of my previous family.

I can honestly say that the three brothers helped me in more ways than one. Their simple presence was a rock I could hold onto.

* * *

"Nori?" I asked once when we were alone together after one of my nightmares had occurred.

He hummed, simply to let me know he was listening, and I felt his chest rumble against my shoulder and back.

"Thank you…for being there."

He remained silent but I felt his arms tightened slightly around my waist. He hummed once more and we didn't exchange anymore words that night. He silently let his head rest on top of mine. My cheek was resting against his shoulder, my nose buried in his beard that had such a comforting smell for me. It had become a familiar mix of tobacco and leather with something else I couldn't identify but that altogether made Nori's scent.

We never spoke of those moments. It was as if what occurred in the darkness of the night was ours only. Or at least I liked to think so.

* * *

Soon a whole month had passed without me realizing it.

In that time I had adapted fairly well and was now looking as much like a dwarf as I could. Considering I had no beard and had slightly thiner bones it was quite a feat to manage that level of similitude already. I was now wearing dwarvish dresses that were warm and fitting; Danà had told me dwarves women were used to those form fitting clothes.

"You should be proud of the forms Mahal gave you" she had emphasized making me blush.

The seamstresses had delivered the breeches and long tunics I had asked for and even Dori had to admit it was entirely appropriate, if unusual, to wear them. He did ask me to wait a bit before wearing them in the halls though. I quickly got to love them, they were comfortable, warm, and form fitting but the long tunic would hide what the dwarves would deem inappropriate to see.

Yet, I wore mostly the dresses, I didn't want to stand out too much, especially now that I was officially Oin's apprentice and I respected Dori's opinion.

* * *

So here I was. A month after my arrival in the Halls, wearing a nice blue dress and white apron I always wore in the wards.

"So, which one is it?' Oin was holding a bunch of dried flowers in front of me.

-Hem…fewfever?

-It's Feverfew and no, this isn't it.

-Equin…something…a ?"

Oin sighed deeply, clearing wondering why I just couldn't get it. Still those were dried plants. Dried, as in all brown coloured and shrivelled to an unrecognizable size. I could see Oin was slightly disappointed when he shook his head desperately.

"Think before you talk. You should know about that. There's something clearly lacking on this plant that makes it impossible to be feverfew or Echinacea.

-Ah…Echinacea that's what I… Right. Concentrate. Focus."

I'm ashamed to admit it did take me quite some time before blurting out.

"There's no flower! There's no flower!

-Good. But that doesn't tell you what plant it is and how to use it."

Killjoy.

"Maybe,' I hesitated, 'maybe I could try and write down what you teach me? It'd be easier to remember like that.

-You know how to write?' he seemed genuinely surprised.

-Of course." I scoffed.

And starting that day I meticulously started to write down in a little notebook all the information Oin gave me. I even asked him if I could sew in the thick parchment some pieces of the dried plants, to help me recognize them.

The master healer was happy to see me so serious about my studies, that much was obvious.

Ori was extremely pleased when I first asked him to give me one of his blank notebooks and I remember clearly how Dori and Nori had exchanged a worried glance.

"Amelia, do you plan on writing everything on this book?' Dori asked sweetly.

-Well, yes. I'm used to write things down to help remember them. It's too hard just trying to recall discussions.

-You'll need quills and we'll have to buy more ink too.' Ori seemed enthusiast. 'I'm sure you'll need more notebooks too.

-Yes, probably." I smiled at him.

I was with Ori while he was writing down a list of items we'll need when I heard Nori mutter in a slightly scared and resigned way.

"We got two of them now."

* * *

It took me around another month to be able to recognize with undeniable certitude all the dried plants we had in our usual stocks. All things considered, we didn't have that many in the stock and I hadn't really memorized or seen the other medicinal plants that could be used. To say I was surprised about the sheer diversity of useful plants would put it mildly. Of course I had known that some plants had medicinal properties and that they were used centuries ago in my own world. But still there's a difference between knowing about it and witnessing it. Besides there was no course in med school, that covered how to recognize dried sage from goatweed.

The notebooks had been immensely useful and I now had several of them, full of information and dried plants. I would often reread them and Ori would from time to time ask me questions about the plants, helping me greatly to memorize all that knowledge.

That particular morning had been spent with me finally learning how to prepare my very first ointment. Well I had been observing and assisting Oin mostly. I was quite proud of my achievements so far and Oin was even prouder, saying I was the quickest apprentice he'd seen. I'm sure he was saying it only to be nice and when I had told so to Dori, Nori and Ori they had simply told me that to become a healer, it usually took twenty years of apprenticeship.

Twenty years. Right.

Not going to happen.

The simple thought of spending twenty years without approaching a patient and simply grabbing tools for Oin was not really in accordance with my personal projects.

Still, Oin affirmed I was quick in my learning, even though the first stage had taken me quite some time to achieve and we still had many things to cover. I would admit we had actually barely scratched the surface of what I should learn about plants.

That day though, Oin had been happy to see I had no problem measuring proportions and I was quick in catching how to do an ointment. What should I say, between home cooking, chemistry and such stuff, it really didn't seem that complicated to measure quantities of plants and mix them together. Seeing my progress were faster than he had expected, Oin had told me I could go home earlier that afternoon, besides there wasn't much to do in the ward.

I was about to leave when the most awkward and strange thing happened. It started with a low, deep and faraway rumble that seemed to echo in the corridors and Halls. Then there was a sort of tremor that ran in the stone. I felt it in my very bones and could hear some of our copper tools clinking against each other slightly.

It was the first time I experienced such a thing and I turned toward Oin questioningly.

I felt dread start to pool in my stomach when I saw the expression on his face.

For the first time since I had known him, Oin was very pale, as if all blood had left his face, and I could see fear in his eyes. Before I could even react he jumped toward me, grabbed my arm, and yanked me toward the far wall, the one that was against the mountain side.

"Oin what is it?" I asked, scared by his behaviour.

He didn't answer and seemed to wait for something. At that time only, I realized there was an eerie, unnatural silence in the whole Halls. For the first time ever I couldn't hear the booming voices echoing from who knows where, there wasn't any faraway clanking sound or any sound really.

Just complete silence.

And then I heard the chaos.

Yells and shouts echoed and came to my ears, distorted by their journeys through the corridors.

"What is it? What happened?' I asked once more.

-A part of the halls, probably in the mine, just collapsed." Oin answered before rushing around in the ward.

I remained unmoving for maybe ten seconds before rushing alongside him, preparing bowls of water and clean linens and threads for bandages and sewing the wounds. I didn't even think about questioning his certitudes about the collapsing of a part of the mines.

"What shall I prepare?' I asked and thank god he heard me clearly.

-We'll need honey. Start preparing infusions of yarrow too. It'll help slow the bleeding. I'll prepare the salves and ointments we'll need.

-I come from the kitchen, they'll bring the pots of honey they have immediately."

This new voice startled me and I took a second to glance at the person who had just entered the ward. I guessed it was the second healer who came only when needed. From the fine black beard with just a few streak of grey and the curves in the body that were prettily enhanced with a grey dress, I guessed she was a woman.

I know…I could mostly guess correctly thanks to the dress.

I didn't take much time to ponder on this though as I was busy preparing herbs for infusion.

"Oin, should I add Echinacea or lavender or something?"

The woman answered me instead of the dwarf who was currently busy with his hands full of pots and jars of all sizes.

"Use the Echinacea but add chamomile instead of lavender. The soothing effect would be more important.

-Alright, hem…"

In my rush I suddenly wasn't sure which plant was Echinacea. I should have been able to recognize it though because Oin had particularly insisted on me knowing this one on sight. Behind me the woman was observing me with keen eyes, I could feel her stares burning a hole in the back of my head. I took a deep breath to calm my anxiety and finally be able to focus.

Thank god it worked.

My mind was clearer and I had no trouble grasping the proper amount of Echinacea that would once ingested help the patient to strengthen his immune system. I went to prepare the infusions and only saw her nod approvingly from the corner of my eyes. Apparently I had just passed some test I hadn't known was occurring.

I was still preparing the infusions when the first echoes of rushed steps came to my ears. Soon enough four dwarves came in holding a stretcher. A bloodied body lay on it, unmoving and silent. They managed to quickly put the dwarf on one of the beds and went back running. They had left the room for a second when a second group came in, then a third, a fourth.

In less than fifteen minutes, we ended up with a dozen of patients, all hurt to various degrees. To allow Oin and the woman time to concentrate on the most serious cases, I had instinctively started a triage of sort at the entrance as soon as the fourth injured dwarf had come in.

Then I quickly took care of those who had minor scratches and cuts. The dwarves coming with the stretcher had apparently quickly caught on what I had asked them for they continued to dispatch the wounded according to their apparent injury's status.

After a while some women came in and Oin ordered me to let them take care of the bandages, asking me to instead sew the wounds and help with the gravely injured.

Time flew without me noticing. My thoughts were entirely focused on the wounds I cleaned, disinfected and sew back before applying honey ointment and bandages on them. I had no memories of ever having to face such an intense situation before.

At some point though I ended up with no dwarf to help and I felt slightly lost. Looking around I could see Oin shaking his head in front of one unconscious dwarf and I automatically went to join him.

"What is it?

-He's bleeding inside I think' He said pointing at the rapidly darkening skin on the dwarf's stomach 'There's nothing I can do for him."

I looked at Oin, stunned. Did he mean he wouldn't do anything?

"Oin, we can open and see if it's possible to shut the wound. It might not be enough but…

-Opening him? How would that be useful?' The healer sounded almost horrified.

-Please, let me try. I know it could work. I'll just need a clean, sharp blade and lots of linen to absorb the blood, threads and the smallest needles we have. I'll need something to keep his abdomen open too.

-Are you…are you certain it could help him?' He clearly was doubtful.

-It's often done in my world." I simply answered.

Oin seemed to hesitate but seeing as this dwarf was the last one requiring immediate treatment and as there was nothing Oin thought he could do, he allowed me to try my 'barbaric method'. As a healer he really couldn't refuse to do everything that could possibly be tried.

"He has to remain unconscious and completely still.' I told Oin who nodded.

-I still have some poppy juice left." Oin simply said before rushing to grab a very small vial.

He had told me already that poppy juice was extremely sparse and had to be bought from southern states. We didn't have much and to think he'd give some to a patient he thought would die, just showed me how much confidence he had in me. It made me nervous.

I looked at him forcing some of the juice in the dwarf's mouth.

My anxiety suddenly rose.

Soon I found myself with a blade in shaky hands. That wouldn't do. I needed to be focused and precise in all my movements. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. I tried to replay in my mind diagrams, schemas, pictures and video samples I had studied about internal wounds' treatments. They were all blurry in my memories. Fear, uncertainty, anxiety were rushing through me and I had to shut them down. This dwarf needed all my attention, he needed me to be strong and focused.

The diagrams and other schemas steadily became neat. Slowly the various procedures and their steps unrolled themselves in my mind.

I could do it.

When I opened my eyes next, sounds around faded into nothingness and my hands were steady again, my grip on the blade firm and I knew my every move would be precise. Narrowing my eyes I started to literally butcher the poor unknowing dwarf.

I have no idea how much time passed or how many dwarves came and went around me. I think I remember barking for more light at some point as well as more linen bandages. I had found the bleeding originated from his liver and had sewn as best as I could the wound in his organ.

The weird object Oin had given me to keep the wound I had made open was quickly removed and I stitched the unconscious dwarf back. Once it was all done I used the last drops of adrenaline in my blood to tell Oin he needed to be given something to help replenish blood and help his blood coagulate properly.

I stood idly silent next to the bed. My hands and forearms were red from blood, as was my chest. I probably looked like a mad butcher at this moment. The injured dwarf though was still breathing and I had hopes my little stunt would work. After all dwarves were a tough lot.

I managed to stand for a few minutes, unable to move, with my arms falling limply at my sides. And then I suddenly realized what I had just done. For the first time in my life I had operated someone, unsupervised and without any proper monitoring of the patient's conditions. I even did it in an unsterilized environment with doubtfully clean tools.

Oh dear lord.

I was most certainly the most foolish and stupidly stubborn person ever. My mind was whirling with lists of complications that could happen and I cursed myself for taking such risks with someone's life.

I wasn't authorized to perform such things in my world. What folly had made me believe I could do it here?

Black spots started to cloud my vision as I hyperventilated. I turned around to look at the mess in the wards. Injured dwarves were still lying on the floor because we didn't have enough beds; there were bloodied bandages, pieces of rocks, woods and other materials we had removed from the wounds. Overall it was chaos around me and it wasn't the moment to feel faint.

The woman healer came to me in quick strides and guided me toward the only empty corner in the room. Forcing me to sit down she then brought some clean water and linen to help me wash the blood from my arms and hands.

"Did some of them die?' I had no idea why I asked that question, my stupidity knew no limits.

She looked me in the eyes, she had clear, icy blue eyes that reminded me of someone else but that I couldn't quite place.

"Yes. We lost three good dwarves when the ceiling of one of the minor mining tunnels collapsed. We couldn't retrieve them. In the wards, we lost two."

Five. Five men had died in the last hours. That reminded me of my inaptitude at keeping tabs of the time.

"How long…I mean what time is it now? It was just the afternoon when…

-It's well past midnight. Dawn will be upon us soon enough."

My eyes widened at that. I couldn't believe I'd spent so much time in here. I looked up and counted the bodies I could see. The woman seemed to guess what I was doing and answered my unasked question.

"There are eight of them in the wards. Seven more are lying in the second room nearby where we put some makeshift beds. Ten were sent back to their homes with minor injuries."

I did the math quickly. Twenty-five people had been injured, five had died. That wasn't such a good result in my book. I wished we could have done more.

"There was nothing else to do and yes, you're as easy to read as a book right now so don't quirk that eyebrow at me. We did well today. Mines accidents happen, it's sadly a part of dwarves' lives."

I nodded, still saddened and wondering if I could have done something more, something different. Thank god I hadn't witnessed any death myself. My gaze fell on the dwarf I had operated and an awful voice whispered in my head. _I hadn't witnessed it…yet._

Hands cleaner I rubbed my forehead, exhaling an exhausted sigh. There was still a lot to do. First it was of utmost importance to clean the ward. Then we had to monitor the wounded and the absence of monitoring tools put an impressive damper on my already forlorn mood.

"We'll have to keep close attention to the wounded but for now there's nothing you can do without some sleep. Go back home."

The woman said before I shook my head no.

"I'll help clean the ward, and then I'll go take some sleep. We could as well put a makeshift bed for one of us around. It'd be better to be close in case of emergency."

She seemed to seriously ponder my ideas, which I was grateful for. She then gave a strict nod before telling me.

"We don't need your help, I asked a few dwarves to come and clean the room. Don't worry about it and just go back home to have a full sleep.' I went to protest but she stopped me and continued 'After you come back in six or seven hours minimum, we'll think some more about your other idea and we'll see with Oin whether we put it into practice or not."

I sighed. Honestly I was really exhausted and the prospect of falling asleep right here and there was already really tempting. I couldn't say no to my own comfy bed that was waiting for me welcomingly.

I stoop up, helped by the woman's strong hands and as I was leaving she gave me a light tap in the back.

"You did well."

I took a few steps before turning at the door to face her again.

"I don't even know your name.' I said simply.

-I'm Dís.

-Amelia.' I simply added.

-I know."

I nodded and left. Our greetings had been different than any I had had with dwarves before, clearly direct and to the point and without any added politeness. Well we just had spent hours close to each others with others' blood flowing between our fingers.

Who cared about decorum and politeness after that?

* * *

**A/N: Thank you everyone for the reviews! It helped me a lot and cheered me when I most needed it earlier this week :) Thanks too to all the new followers and favorites! **

**So this chapter is kinda huge and I hope you enjoyed it.**

**I know that the last part with the operation might appear entirely too far-fetched but I honestly believe it's still possible and not too unrealistic. If you disagree, please let me know though.**

**Thanks again for everyone's support! It's really appreciated :)**

**I'll update the next chapter sometime tomorrow. **


	10. Thorin's Labyrinth

**Everything still belongs to JRR Tolkien...except for my OC and the plot**

* * *

I had the strange feeling that it took me hours to go back to the three brothers' home after leaving the healing wards. All in all it probably didn't take me more than ten, maybe fifteen minutes, but it felt excruciatingly long and slow.

By the time I arrived in front of the door, my eyes were closing without my accord and I felt too tired to even lift my hand to turn the doorknob. I let my head fall against the wood with a thud, closing my eyes for just a second. Just a second was needed to catch my breath and gather my thoughts.

As I took a deep breath though, the world suddenly tilted and I fell forward. I sadly thought I would soon meet the floor in a close embrace but only fell on a hard, warm chest.

"Oy!" The chest exclaimed.

Wait…how could a chest speak? Oh dear my brain was sluggish.

"Amelia! Finally!" A second voice said.

My mind was clearly cloudier than I thought as it took me a short while to realize I was once more in Nori's arms and Dori was once more hovering over me.

"She's exhausted. Carry her in the kitchen' Dori ordered.

-Not her room?' Apparently even Ori was awake.

-She's covered in blood and hasn't had diner or breakfast. She needs to eat and wash up a bit before going to sleep.' Dori explained in a motherly, or maybe fatherly, tone.

-She doesn't look like she'll be able to eat' Ori mused and I guessed he was right.

-We'll have to help her then…

-M fnn…"

I swear it had sounded human in my head, but my mouth didn't feel like cooperating right now. Nori chuckled. Next time I was awake, I'll whack him just for that. Well, if I remembered anything that is, and if he let me too. These dwarves had awfully good reflexes and Nori's were really amazing. Just looking at him catching the plates thrown by his brother at him once, had convinced me of his abilities.

"I'm sorry, what was that?' he said jokingly.

-I said I'm fine!' I enunciated properly. 'I'm just really, really tired.'

-Really, we wouldn't have thought…"

Oh…the nerves of this dwarf. I was busy glaring at him when I realized he was actually holding me in his arms. When exactly had my feet left the ground? I sighed and put my head on his shoulder. I closed my eyes. He might be annoyingly cheeky and smug, but Nori was a very, very comfortable dwarf to sleep on.

"Oy, don't sleep yet.' Nori told me.

-I won't, you can put me down you know." I said, though I really wished he hadn't listened to me this time.

I felt a weird thing in my chest when he removed his arms from around me; I was really more tired than I thought. He helped me sit on the bench in the kitchen and I leaned on the table, letting my head rest on the cool, polished wood. I sighed contentedly at the wonderful smell of Dori's rabbit stew and I waited patiently for him to put a steaming bowl in front of me. The brothers waited just as patiently for me to eat, none of them speaking.

The warm food cleared my mind a bit and I sighed. I felt like I should tell them about what had happened.

"There were five casualties." I said blankly.

They remained silent, their faces grim as I continued.

"I don't know their names though…

-How are you?' Ori asked me, patting my forearm with his large hand.

-I'm fine really, it's just…' I started but couldn't continue, not really realizing yet what I had done.

-You just what?' Dori encouraged me.

-I did something I wasn't supposed to do. In my world I wasn't qualified yet to do it…and I just did it and doing it…

-I'm sorry' Ori interrupted 'But what exactly is it that you did?

-I operated someone."

Their blank look reminded me that I probably should elaborate a bit.

"There was this dwarf; he was unconscious and bleeding in the insides. I opened him and managed to find the wound in his body and then I stitched everything back close. In my world, you can't do that if you're not experienced enough."

They looked at me with surprised faces, clearly uncertain about what to say. Then Dori, the ever nice and encouraging Dori, gently told me.

"You did well. If this dwarf survives, then it'll be incredible. And if he doesn't, at least you'd have tried everything you could. Anyway how can you gain experience if you don't practice?"

His simple logic and words managed to calm my worries, for the time being at least. I knew I would have to think further about it on my own, when my brain would be well-rested. I ate what was left of my stew and stirred with a groan as I heard some of my joints pop loudly.

"Would one of you mind waking me in around six hours? I'll need to go back to the wards, there're many injured people to take care of.

-We'll wake you, don't worry.' Nori said, stopping Dori's protests about my lack of sleep.

-You should let your dress in front of your door after you've changed.' Ori then said, red faced.

-Aye, we'll put it in cold water to remove the blood before it stains it irreparably.' Dori added

-Thanks" I gave them my sweetest, tired smile and stoop up.

I stumbled slightly but Nori's watchful eyes and speedy reflexes caught me before I even registered I was about to fall. I smiled some more at him and he squeezed my waist lightly before releasing his hold. I staggered to my room, feeling as if I had drunk far too much even though I was entirely sober. I quickly changed into clean clothes and let my soiled dress on the floor outside my door. I was asleep already when my head fell on the comfortable pillow.

* * *

The following days were mostly spent in the healing wards and I barely went to the three brothers' home. I usually came back just to change clothes quickly and grab some extra food. Most of the time though I ate in the ward with Dís and Oin as the main kitchen, which cooked food, mostly lunches, for the dwarves working in the forges and mines delivered trays full of delicious dishes to us.

At that time I found out that one of the main cooks was Bombur, Bofur's brother. I also learned that there was a general dining hall where all dwarves could go to eat at almost any time of the day.

I remember stuttering like an idiot when Dís told me she was the King's sister and she laughed quite loudly at my reaction. The days were spent tending to the injured dwarves who slowly got better, save for one who died the day following the accident in the mines. It had been quite hard finding him dead on the bed and I had to hide in the backroom where plants were stored in order to cry.

I knew that I should have been prepared for his death, anyone's death really, as I was a mere healer, not god. Yet it was a terrible experience to find out I had been trying to gently wake a dead person without realizing he was gone immediately.

The wonderful news though, was that my little try at being a surgeon hadn't had terrible results as of yet. A week after the so called operation, the dwarf was still alive, though he was still under constant care in the healing ward and wouldn't be sent back to his home before long.

I had had more time to think about my decision to operate. I couldn't say I felt confident it was a good decision, but as the dwarf was alive, I couldn't really regret it.

Oin and Dís had been impressed but I had told them I had merely been lucky; which was the honest truth as so many things could still go wrong. The both of them were clearly interested with the procedure but I couldn't really teach them anything. First I was far from being an expert and second, I couldn't exactly draw back all the schemas I knew, mostly because I was terrible at drawing. Then again, I really couldn't tell what I would do if another similar situation were to happen.

In a way I really wasn't confident in me, in the rooms and equipments here, and as I had endlessly repeated, so many things could go wrong. But on the other hand, between letting someone die without doing anything and trying everything I could even though there was only a remote chance of success…well I knew what option I'd choose.

Balir, the dwarf I had operated, had awoken once the following day before falling back asleep. He had fully awaken two days after the events and had been shocked to find out I had basically almost gutted him in cold blood.

I could already see my reputation as a cold blooded psychopath spread within the halls.

That made Dís and Bofur laugh quite a lot.

During this time I came to know Dís quite well and I realized she was probably as stern as her brother, though she let herself laugh and smile more often. This, she told me once, was mostly thanks to her two sons who were such troublemakers that she was forced to sometimes laugh or she'd explode from barely contained anger.

Danà came to help us as often as she could and the two women helped me to steadily feel more at ease in this new environment I was still discovering.

After a whole week spent almost entirely in the healing wards, I had met a good part of the dwarves' population. Each family member would come at one point or another to visit their injured kin and it would more often than not degenerate in some sort of cheerful picnic in the wards.

The first time I witnessed the dwarves coming in with whole plates full of roasted meat and barrels of ale, I was flabbergasted. Hadn't it been for Dís being here, the situation would have escalated to a full party. After repeatedly explaining we were in a ward, not a dining hall, and the patients were recovering not simply relaxing, we finally managed to ban such events.

It did take several tries though.

God, how stubborn could they be?

Still, after a week there were only three injured dwarves left in our care. The others had been more or less kicked back home with strict orders not to go to work until express clearance by one of the healers and had to come back regularly to change the bandages.

So far they had all obeyed.

Still we had now the possibility to go back to our own houses too. The three dwarves left in our care didn't need our constant monitoring and I was glad to be able to go relax with the three brothers.

Thus here I was that evening, peacefully lounging in the living room, waiting for the brothers to come back. Dori and Ori were the first to arrive and we all sat, waiting for Nori to come home. The two brothers had been in the middle of a discussion so I had to concentrate to try and catch on.

"How long will it be this time?' Ori asked before taking a long sip of ale from the tankard he had taken in the kitchen.

-Probably around two weeks at least, three more likely. It'll take time to go there with the full wagons.

-That long?

-Aye, the road isn't that good; Dwalin went to scout a bit. He'll be coming too.

-What is going on?' I finally asked.

-I'm leaving tomorrow morning. I'll be going to sell some supplies to a few shop owners in the southern towns.

-And you'll be gone for three weeks?"

I'll admit, even I could hear the worry in my voice so it was no use wondering why Dori and Ori heard it too.

"Don't worry. It's nothing new, I do it every year at the same period.

-Still…

-I have to go now. If we wait we'll risk being stuck in the mud with the wagons.

-Aren't merchants attacked on the road?' I asked, both anxious for him and curious.

-Aye. That's why we have some more dwarves accompanying us.

-Like Dwalin?

-Aye"

I simply nodded. Not really happy for I knew I'd be worried all the time he'll be away. Yet there was nothing I could, or would, do. It was his choice and he was way older than me, clearly old enough to take his decisions wisely. Besides summer was soon going to end and Ori had told me that autumn could be extremely rainy in the mountains, so it made perfect sense for the merchants' caravans to travel before the rains became too strong.

I asked them more questions about his trips and Dori told me some anecdotes about what happened during his long years travelling the roads around.

I laughed heartily not entirely believing that Dwalin had once be surprised, being attacked while he took his bath in a river and had no other choices at the time but to fight the bandits butt naked. Ori, who swore it was quite the renowned story among the Halls, seriously explained that the sheer sight might have scared the scoundrels away.

By the end of the story I was crying from mirth, Ori was laughing heartily too and Dori was chuckling lightly.

Then I asked a question that had been on my mind for a while now

"Dori' I said seriously 'What happened to Bifur? How can he still be, you know, alive?"

Dori seemed to ponder a bit before speaking. He took his pipe out and the small bag that contained the weeds he smoke.

"It's a nasty story, really. Bifur was, still is, a great warrior. He used to go with Dwalin, they usually were hired together as mercenaries. One day the caravan they protected got assailed by goblins. One of them managed to throw his axe in Bifur's head. Bifur got so mad he massacred the creatures. But once the fight was over, Dwalin told us he became suddenly quite withdrawn in an instant. When Dwalin tried to speak with him Bifur didn't react."

I was entirely focused on the story Dori was telling. I could quite clearly picture the wound with blood gushing from it. I nodded at Dori to continue as he lighted his pipe.

"Their contract wasn't honoured yet and Bifur was still functioning quite normally so Dwalin and Bifur escorted the caravan to the point they were supposed to go to. A week or so later they were back here. Bifur still had the whole axe protruding from his head; he had apparently become quite violent when Dwalin had tried to approach him to remove it."

I bit my lower lip, thinking about the hardship and pain the two had surely felt.

"When they arrived, Bofur and Bombur were immediately called and Oin and Dís examined Bifur. The four of them managed to convince Bifur to let them cut the major part of the axe but they didn't dare try and remove it for fear it would kill him.

-And he's been living like that since? Is that the reason why he never speaks?

-Oh he speaks; you just can't understand him. And yes, he's been living like that for what, twenty, twenty-five years now?

-Twenty-five years?' I was astonished. 'You said I can't understand, what do you mean?

-Since he got this axe in his brain, he hasn't uttered a word in Westron, the language we're speaking now. He only speaks few words at a time in Khuzdul and Iglishmêk.

-I'm sorry, what?"

Ori chuckled and Dori gave me a small smile, puffing happily on his pipe. Ori decided to relay his brother and explained to me.

"Khuzdul is our language, nobody besides us speaks it and we're not supposed to use it in front of strangers. Iglishmêk is a sign language only dwarves use and know."

I nodded, not even thinking about being surprised not having heard of those languages yet. Now that I thought about it though I could clearly remember various instance when I had heard dwarves speak or mutter words and curses in a language I couldn't understand. Usually I could hear those strange sounding words when I was in the market or in the corridors.

Truth be told, I hadn't paid much attention to this. My mind was already busy learning about their habits and the healing herbs with Oin, I had no time right now to even think about asking to learn a foreign language.

Knowing the dwarves I had the hunch it would be a fairly complicated language too.

We didn't see Nori that night and I wondered briefly where he was, remembering vaguely that Ori told me once it was usual for him to disappear from time to time. The following day I went to send Dori away at the entrance of the Halls. I was glad I managed not to cry, and I was really surprised to be that affected by his departure. Ori was with me as I stayed under the massive doors until Dori's figure had entirely disappeared in the forests.

For the second night in a row Nori didn't come back and Ori and I spent quite a gloomy evening.

Ori really was easy to read sometimes, his moods were freely displayed on his face. In my eyes that made him an honest and sweet person.

That evening I could see he was upset, feeling down because of something though I didn't know what specifically. It could either be because of Dori's and Nori's absence or because of something else entirely. In any case I didn't think I had any power over it.

I tried my best to cheer him up, deciding even to tell him tales of my home even though it still hurt me deeply to think of it. Yet it didn't change his mood.

* * *

A whole week after Dori's departure, Nori hadn't come back and I was worried. Really worried.

I didn't understand why, but the absence of the second brother was making me really fidgety and anxious. I had had one nightmare in his absence and Ori hadn't been able to soothe me nearly as much as Nori could. I had missed him sorely that night and I missed his calm and silent presence in the apartment. I wondered when he'd come back and wink cheekily while smirking and mocking me about one thing or another.

Ori was sulking and moping in the house, barely talking to me and I was somehow left alone to manage this strange and new situation. Even the sight of dinner consisting only of meat, no vegetables I swear, didn't cheer up the sweet dwarf. Seeing that Ori hadn't pronounced a word in two days, I decided that it was high time to do something, though I had no idea what to do.

I was in the wards with Oin when I asked him how to go to Bofur's place from here. Bofur was, after all, one of the cheeriest persons I knew. Besides he would probably know what was happening with Ori and I was certain he'd help me deal with this situation. He was, from what I could gather, one of the brothers' closest friend, if not the closest.

The old healer nicely told me the directions and, at the end of the afternoon, I decided to go and ask the ever cheerful man for help. I really hoped he'd be able to transform Ori back to his normal, sweet, curious and talkative way. I really missed my sweet friend.

I strode quickly in the corridors, trying to follow Oin's directions, while already thinking about what I would tell Bofur.

I should have known. I really should have. Things in my life were never that easy.

* * *

Why didn't I double check to assure that Oin had understood clearly what I said? Why didn't I ask him to repeat the information?

Was it left after the market's corridor and right after the statue of the dwarf maiden? Or was it straight till the dwarf warrior then twice left and down the stairs?

When had my memory become so messy and useless?

I had been turning around in dark corridors for what seemed like hours now and I was reminiscent of the day I lost my way in the caves before arriving. I felt like I would soon turn claustrophobic too.

I had tried to follow my steps back to the point where I had obviously taken a wrong turn but honestly, nothing looked more like a dwarf made corridor than another dwarf made corridor.

Couldn't they put signs?

I remembered ascending some steps but hadn't found them back. Guessing I had to go down anyway I had taken a corridor that sloped in what I thought to be the general direction of the entrance.

And I had magnificently managed to get myself lost in barely lit corridors. Torches were few and far between, and some smaller corridors were actually only lit by the remnants of lights coming from other paths. If there was light, I thought, at least that meant that someone was bound to come around.

Well apparently not.

Every time I tried to turn back and trace my way back I ended up in some unknown places. I tried to follow the torches and lights, but it didn't lead me anywhere either because those stupid dwarves apparently enjoyed to put torches everywhere, even in corridors they never went to.

I had no idea for how long I turned and walked and turned back round. I found ascending stairs, then descending ones, small passages and short unlit corridors. The more I walked, the further I got lost and I simply couldn't find my way back. Backtracking then turning around left and right, stopping often and talking to myself, I had slowly but surely become entirely confounded by this…this mountain and its dwarves.

Right now I was starting to wonder whether I'll ever find my way back or whether I'll die somewhere from starvation. The weirdest thing being that I felt oddly detached from the whole situation.

Honestly it was all so ridiculous that I couldn't find it in myself to worry at the moment. I had no idea before that day that the corridors went so deep in the mountain. I noticed that the architecture had seemed to change and once I realized why I could have slapped myself for my once again brilliant demonstration of stupidity.

I had somehow manage to find natural caves below the Halls and had, from what I could tell, been walking in paths that hadn't been set up as of yet.

I highly doubted that someone would think about looking for me here so I had only myself to rely on to find my way back.

I was as good as already dead.

The air had become gradually stuffier which indicated that there wasn't much breeze in this unventilated areas. That didn't bode well in my mind. Once more I turned back and walked in the direction I had supposedly come from. I walked back on my steps, arriving at a crossroad. Did I turn left? Or had it been straight? Damn, I was pretty sure I had turned left but this corridor seemed barely lit. I bit my lip.

After a long while, I was truly exhausted. I had been walking nonstop for hours and I didn't doubt night had long since fallen wherever the sky was visible.

It was sheer luck when I found myself on a better lit corridor. I tried to quicken my path but it didn't last long. My legs were burning and I could feel cramps coming and I honestly wished to be able to fall asleep on the floor.

As the thought struck me I eyed the rocky ground with envy. Maybe I could sleep here and find my way back on the morrow? I snorted to myself. I was really tired.

I kept on walking, my thoughts becoming gloomy. With my luck, Ori wouldn't have even realized I had gone missing and Dori and Nori weren't even here anyway. They wouldn't try and find me before at least tomorrow afternoon. In that time span I could as well visit the whole mountain's caves for all I knew.

Grumbling and cursing any and every dwarf I could think of for their inability to put damn signs in their corridors, I kept on walking and walking and walking some more until I really couldn't take it anymore.

Leaning my back against the wall I let myself slide slowly to the ground. With the back of my head against the cool rock I closed my eyes and extended my legs in front of me. It didn't take more than a few minutes for me to fall asleep.

Obviously, my nightmares couldn't leave me alone for one night and chose that exact moment to make their presence known. The deep darkness and the uncertainty of my situation had probably influenced my mind into an anxious setting.

I woke up in a jolt, hitting the wall with my head which caused me to curse loudly. I didn't know how much time had passed but I found myself in a corridor where the lights were pretty dim. I couldn't hear any noise besides the one I was making. Each little scrap of my shoes against the rocks would slowly echo, the sound being scarily distorted in the pathways.

I wondered who and when the dwarves will come to light or change the torches. What was the point to bother lighting torches around here if no one ever came? It made no sense whatsoever.

Being utterly alone in this creepy place, I felt myself grow nervous. Extremely so. The images of my nightmares were still pretty fresh in my mind and I swallowed thickly, trying to calm myself, imagining Nori was here to sooth me.

It didn't work.

Cold sweat ran down my spine and my heart was in a frenzied state. I felt my chest tightened as if imprisoned by a metal case. Suddenly I could barely breathe.

Having a panic attack in the middle of nowhere wasn't probably my best idea but I really had no control over my body at the moment and besides, I wasn't really known for my good ideas. I clenched my fists strongly, feeling some of my nails pierce the skin of my palms.

I tried to apply any trick I could think of, I even tried to hum and sing aloud to break the gloom of the corridors, but the weird echoing of my own voice only frightened me more. Tears were falling on the floor, while my open eyes were unseeing of my surroundings. I wondered at some point whether I'll have a heart attack and die from sheer panic.

That would really be pathetic.

It probably took me around half an hour to regain control over my mind and body and finally stop the uncontrolled trembles that had shaken my body. In that specific moment I sorely missed Dori and his warm cups of chamomile, Nori and his welcoming arms and Ori and his sweet smile and soothing stories.

I started to think about the evenings I had spent together with the three brothers and their friends. I wanted to forget, even for a second, the gloomy light, the suffocating silence and the maze that extended around me in all directions.

I could perfectly remember one evening, almost a month ago; it had been the week before the mine's collapsing.

* * *

Nori sat with his feet put on the small coffee table that was in front of the hearth, between the four chairs. He had taken his wooden pipe out and was filling it with what I wanted to believe to be tobacco. Well I knew it wasn't really but I didn't want to ponder on that.

Dori was already contentedly smoking, puffing small rings of smoke that dissipated slowly in the air. He was looking into the fire and looked happy, simply at ease in the present setting. From time to time he would stroke his finely braided moustache or the long metallic bead in his beard, but other than that he didn't do much.

Ori was in the kitchen at the time and he silently made his way back to the living room, glaring at Nori, trying to force him to remove his feet from the table so that he could put down a tray he had been holding. Nori rolled his eyes and relented, smirking at his younger brother.

I didn't even need to look to know that there were three large tankards filled to the brim with bitter brown ale. I knew Ori would have thought of me and had as well prepared a warm cup of honeyed water, simple tea or chamomile.

It would always amuse me and sadden me both to think I had come to love this drink I didn't care for before. When my aunt would drink chamomile, I would usually take coffee or chocolate. Now though, chamomile had become my compensation to my lack of caffeine and sugary drinks. Besides it felt oddly nice to have such a bridge between my two worlds, something that anchored me to both of them.

That particular evening, I remember nothing special had happened. We had simply drunk together, watching the fire, talking about nothing really. It had been so peaceful. And then there had been a loud knock on the door.

Ori had been the one to let Bofur, Bifur and Bombur in. Peace and calm were gone in a second and I was the silent, well laughing really, witness to a drinking night the likes of which I had never seen before.

Even Dori and Ori had participated, drinking tankards after tankards, laughing loudly. Bofur had won a disgustingly funny belching contest and I swore that I'd never look at them in quite the same way.

"Won't you drink with us lass?' Bofur had asked me then.

-Nah…you lot drink enough as it is.

-We're not even close to have drink enough!' He joyously answered.

-You're already drinking like a fish!" I exclaimed laughing at the face he pulled when he heard that expression.

Then suddenly I could see a twinkle in his warm brown eyes and he laughed loudly before jumping on one of the chairs. I looked at him flabbergasted when he let a long note out and started to merrily improvise a song, clapping in his hand and hitting the table with his feet to mark the tempo. It was a very merry song about fishes living in a pond, which were drunk and wanted to become dwarves…or something like that.

I laughed heartily until Bombur stepped toward me and extended his hand.

"Will you dance a bit lass?"

My huge smile prompted him to grab my hands and we heartily span and jumped and simply danced the way young children could all around the room. I'm ashamed to say I was surprised at Bombur's ability to dance; for someone his size he was damn swift in his moves. Meanwhile Ori ended up stepping on top of the coffee table, dancing and jumping in the air in perfect rhythm with Bofur's improvised song.

After a last spin and Bofur's last note, Bombur made me swirl around. I squeaked when I felt his hands leave mines. I turned around wildly and ended up in Nori's arms, having trouble to catch my breath.

"You alright there?' He asked with his usual smirk.

-Never had so much fun I think.' I managed to answer in between gasps.

-Really?

-I'm not usually the dancing type of person.

-We'll have to change that then.' He said, his eyes seemed to sparkle with mischief as he turned to yell without letting me go 'Oy, Bofur! Another song please!"

Bofur nodded, smiling, and took a wooden flute out of his pocket while Dori grabbed another one, slightly longer. As soon as the first notes floated in the air, Nori was spinning and twirling me around the room, holding me close to him.

I laughed heartily and remember quite well how his grey eyes shined with mirth, how his lips were quirked in a smile and not a smirk. His large hands rested on my waist, guiding me through the room, between the chairs, tables and dwarves. I probably looked weird with red cheeks, completely dishevelled and breathless while laughing, but in that moment I couldn't care less.

Our antics encouraged Ori to jump on the table once more and dance but that all ended when the table broke and Ori landed brutally on the floor. Well it hadn't really ended there, everyone had a good laugh, even Dori and Ori, but then we all calmed down a bit.

* * *

Thinking back, this had been one of many crazy evenings with the dwarves and I had enjoyed every minutes of it.

I was starting to grow fond of life here, I even enjoyed learning with Oin much more than I had ever enjoyed med school. Being a healer here felt somehow more right than my dreams of becoming a surgeon ever had. These trails of thought allowed me to concentrate on something else than my current situation for awhile, soothing my nerves.

Attempting to be optimistic, I started to make plan for the future days and weeks. First of I needed to speak with Oin now that everything was calmer in the ward. I needed to ask him whether he'd mind if I went to ask a smith to forge some particular tools for the ward. During the collapsing event, I remember needing various things that either didn't exist here or that Oin didn't have.

My thoughts about Oin brought forth many memories of time shared with him and Dís. It probably was the thing I enjoyed most around here, never being truly alone. Even during these past weeks with Dori's and Nori's absences, I always had people around to ease my worries and simply to be here. This closeness with people was an entirely new thing for me; no one really, beside my aunt and uncle, had ever cared for me before I arrived there.

And now here I was, utterly alone and once more lost in a dark tunnel. For a second I wondered whether the moment would soon come where I'll be sent back to my world. After all I had arrived here after losing my way in the tunnels of a cave.

I glanced around quickly, checking whether there were any strange, flickering lights around and oddly enough I felt relieved that there wasn't.

Suddenly I didn't know whether to cry or laugh.

I was entirely alone in a dark place, I wasn't certain and even doubted that I would ever find the way back to the habited parts of the Halls. And yet I'd rather stay there than be sent back to my world.

How sick was that?

I closed my eyes and bit my lower lip, silently offering an apology to my aunt and uncle. I wasn't ready yet to go back to them. I was curious about this strange world, my mind was still buzzing with unanswered questions about this place. I felt like I could be someone here, not just a number on a list of students, not just another nameless face in the crowd. No I really wasn't ready to go back to my world. Was it weird, not wanting to go back home?

I shook my head; I didn't want to leave without learning more about this place. And most of all, I didn't want to abandon my friends, not without having first had the possibility to say a proper goodbye.

Sighing I stretched and stood up. I really wanted to find my way back out of this labyrinth now.

* * *

**A/N: First, I'd like to thank (like always) the reviewers: Sarah0406, BrazilianLOTRFan, and the guest who reviewed last chapter and Alicia457, Pergjithshme, and Adeleidhis for the chapter before that. It really means a lot! thanks for the support! **

**Thanks to the new followers and favorites too! **

**So I hope you enjoyed this chapter. Yes, I know, I couldn't kill the operated dwarf, but I honestly believe it's possible he'd survive. Besides, he's a dwarf, there supposed to be strong...right?**

**And yes...I do enjoy to create trouble for Amelia. :) **

**I don't know when I'll be able to update next. Maybe this weekend but I can't promise anything this time.**


	11. To drink like a Dwarf

**Everything belongs to JRR Tolkien **

* * *

I would never get out of this labyrinth alive...

Maybe my ghost would manage to escape, but I for one was ready to give up soon. I had the feeling I had been running around in circles, even though I couldn't recognize the place I was currently in.

I was feeling a strange mixture of despair and anger.

Anger at myself for stupidly getting stuck in another situation. Anger at the dwarves for not putting doors and signs forbidding the entrance of their maze, or at least tell people they were about to enter an intricate mix of corridors that led straight to hell.

Oh! Now I had a catchy song to whistle.

I'm on a highway to hell…crap, focus Amelia, focus.

I sighed deeply. I wondered what my friends would do when they'd realize I had disappeared. Ori would probably be quite concerned. I felt bad already for adding to his trouble. I shouldn't have tried to go like this, alone in the Halls, looking for Bofur. I should have found another way to help Ori.

Well, what was done, was done. No need to dwell on it now.

I wondered whether Oin would feel guilty or not? In all honesty, it wasn't his fault I had lost my way. I should have stopped walking as soon as I had realized I was lost. Dís would probably scold the poor old dwarf. I winced at that thought. Dís would either end up scolding me for being so light headed or she would crush me into a hug. I believed it more likely that she would scold me though. Danà on the other hand would certainly fuss over me just like Dori would if he were there.

I couldn't help but smile at the thought of the two women.

Dís and Danà had self proclaimed themselves my teachers of all things womenfolk around should know. They were usually talking about dresses and beads. They were always curious about my cooking recipes and encouraged me to try them on the three brothers. Well I knew now that they were doing it mostly because they thought Dori, Nori and Ori needed a strong woman's hand to keep them in line. I didn't know if I was strong or even able to keep them in line, but I could humour my two friends.

Most of the time though, we mostly chitchatted about our days; what was available in the market and other meaningless things. I smiled for myself when I remembered the events of two days before Dori's departure.

* * *

It had been something that had started to bother me quite a bit. Of course I was the only one to see and even know about it, but it was about a notion so ingrained in my brain that I just couldn't let it pass. I had to find a bloody razor to shave my legs and armpits in a place where people loved to be hairy. Talk about a challenge.

I really didn't feel like trying to use one of the wards' so called scalpel, and the huge knives, daggers and blades I could find in the brothers' apartments simply looked too...lethal. I had resigned myself then to shamefully ask Dís and Danà while we were gathered around a wonderful honey cake, Dís had baked. We were sitting in the kitchen, drinking tea and snacking while the brothers were absent.

"What is bothering you' Dís asked me before continuing 'And yes, it is easy to see something is bothering you and you're hesitating to ask us."

I bit my lower lip while they patiently waited for me to gather some courage.

"Well it's…I mean…hem. Do you know where I could find a razor?' My voice had lowered to an almost whisper.

-A razor? Dear pardon me for being blunt, but you don't have any beard to trim.' Danà looked extremely sad, as if my lack of beard was a grave affliction. Well I guess here it kind of was.

-It's not to trim a beard. It's…where I come from we shave.' I tried to explain.

-You shave?' Dís and Danà asked together, clearly not understanding what I meant.

-We shave our…legs, and armpits and … you know, there." I pointed with my finger to my pubis, cheeks already red with embarrassment.

In the silence that followed I immediately grabbed my cup of tea before gazing upwards while I sipped it.

I froze before spitting all the tea I had sipped on the table. Coughing loudly, chocking and feeling as if my face was literally on fire. Dís and Danà quickly went to me and finally understood the reason of this weird reaction I had, just after confessing an oddity they couldn't comprehend.

There, in the entrance of the kitchen, stood Nori, who was probably as red as I was. He had quickly mumbled something, sputtering some words before turning around and leaving once more.

After that, Dís and Danà had told me dwarves never shaved, merely using razors to trim their beard into intricate designs. We never talked about it again, and I looked at my legs forlornly more than once after this discussion.

To my utter shame and embarrassment, Nori disappeared the day after he overheard our odd talk. Yet I couldn't believe he had left us just because of that, it'd be just too strange.

* * *

I wouldn't mind feeling shame and embarrassment right now if it meant I would get out of these tunnel-like corridors quickly.

Being stuck alone in the dark wasn't really good for my sanity apparently. I wanted to yell when suddenly a strange noise echoed against the walls.

My first reaction was fear. What if there was another wall collapsing and I really ended up stuck under there forever? Well, it was true, given how hungry I already was that forever wouldn't last long but still. And it would be even worse if I ended up stuck under the collapsed rocks.

I waited for long seconds for the tremor that should logically made the walls, floors and ceilings tremble. But nothing came.

Then I realized that the sound hadn't stopped. Still it echoed in the corridors, preventing me to locate where it came from.

Concentrating on it while hope was building inside my chest, I soon distinguished different voices, though I couldn't recognized them.

"Hello?" I said, but obviously not loud enough. I repeated the same word, loudly this time, and waited.

My heart fell in my stomach when only complete silence answered me. Had I imagined the noise? Was I having hallucinations? That wasn't a good sign, and it could mean way too many creepy things. Was I breathing enough oxygen? Had I hit my head too strongly on the wall? Was I already dead? Oh please, I didn't want to die like this…it was just so stupid.

"Milady?" A strong voice reached me through the echoes.

I straightened immediately. My eyes were wide open, trying to catch some figures, some light but there was nothing. Still, I hadn't dreamed that word now, had I?

"Hey! Please can you help me?" I said in as loud a voice I could without actually shouting.

The echo ran away in the corridors while I stayed put.

"We're looking for you. Don't move. Talk lowlier."

I could have danced here and now when I heard that. I suddenly felt giddy, people were coming to my rescue, how awesome was that?

"Do you have torches with you?" I asked in a loud voice though much lower than before.

Still I could hear the difference in the echo as it didn't quite bounce around as much. I didn't feel afraid anymore, though I was wondering whether my rescue team would know the way back. That would be funny if they got lost too. Well you had to appreciate dark, morbid humour but still, it'd be ironic.

"We have two of them." The same voice informed me.

"Well I don't see anything yet if that's useful for you."

I heard a chuckle. I could swear I just heard a chuckle. The bastard was having fun. Worse than that, he was having fun at my expense.

"Oy' I said, a smirk tugging on my lips 'Next time you laugh I'll whack your head!"

This time he laughed heartily and the genuine sound made me smile.

"Do you see the torches yet?" There was a second voice and it was clearly amused.

Maybe the laugh had come from him.

"Nope. Were you the one to laugh or was it your chuckling friend?"

This time I heard the two of them laugh and I couldn't resist, I chuckled as well.

"Milady, are you sure you need rescuing? Your obvious merriment says otherwise."

"Don't you dare leave me alone here!" I almost shouted.

"Wow, not so loud, we can't locate you with the echo. Can you speak normally now?"

It was slightly awkward to have such a discussion in this situation. I suddenly remembered phone calls and how it felt to speak with someone from afar without saying his face to identify the emotions. Had I truly enjoyed that? Now that I was living here, I was getting used to actually talk with people. I enjoyed being able to see their reactions, it was much nicer like this.

"Milady? Are you alright?"

The voice sounded uncertain and it brought me back to the present time. Apparently my silence was worrying them. Choosing to ignore their question I finally asked.

"You sure you two won't get lost too?"

They were laughing when I believed I saw some brighter light flicker at the end of the corridor I was currently in.

"Wait! Don't move!" I told them before jogging toward the end of the corridor. When I arrived I could see the brightness was actually coming from another corridor.

"Milady?' One of them questioned.

-Wait!' I simply said quickly jogging along the second corridor.

-You're close by!' The second voice exclaimed and I laughed.

-I know, I can see the lights of your torches."

After one more corridor, which was definitely smaller, I turned to find myself face to face with two young dwarves. One was blond, the other dark haired. One had a nicely growing beard braided under his chin in two thin tresses with nicely chiselled beads at the end. The second barely had stubble on his chin.

"Hello there.' I said with a huge smile before adding 'Are you two real or am I imagining this?"

They looked at me with huge eyes and I gingerly poked in the shoulder of the dark haired one.

"Oy!' He said before starting to chuckle.

-You're real!' I joyously exclaimed before playfully whacking his arm. 'And that's for laughing at me earlier."

At that the two of them started to laugh heartily and I soon joined them. We took several minutes to calm down and after that I offered them a huge smile.

"I don't know if you came here looking for me or if it's just luck, but I'm glad you came.

-You're welcome milady.' The blond one said.

-You know, I'm really no lady. Call me Amelia.

-I'm Fili, and this is my brother Kili.' The blond said before bowing and chorusing with his brother. 'At your service.

-Amelia, at yours.' I gave the customary reply before asking what bugged me. 'Please tell me we're close to the surface, I'm starving and Ori is probably worried."

The two of them offered me wide toothy grins and Fili answered me once more.

"Ori's beside worried, he's running around wildly and our uncle is probably mad at being bothered by him.

-And we're actually quite far. Sorry but how did you end up here?' Kili asked with a cheerful glint in his eyes.

-Seriously? I have no idea.' I deadpanned and they both laughed

-Let's go Milady, we better go now. You've been absent a long time.' Fili said, still chuckling.

-Have I? I really couldn't tell.

-Well, Ori came to tell us he couldn't find you around sunset. By then he had already found out that Master Oin had probably given you weird directions.

-Sunset is past? Really?' I was honestly surprised by this information.

-Dawn is pretty close actually." Kili shrugged.

At those words I stopped and looked at them.

"You're joking, right?

-Nope!"

It was slightly disturbing to hear them answer in a chorus but I was more worried at that time about Ori's state. The poor dwarf was probably sick with worries. Then I remembered why I got lost to begin with and made an oath to myself to make up for it to the poor upset Ori.

In the meantime I asked the two brothers a question that had turned in my mind for quite some time while I was lost in the corridors.

"Why are there torches down there? It doesn't make sense to light torches in those obviously unused corridors.

-We lighted them this morning, hem yesterday morning. Our uncle wanted to check with several others if we could possibly try to dig in some other parts of the mountain. We're trying to find another spot to mine.' Fili shrugged and explained.

-Yeah, they hope to find some more precious stones. We can only find some crystals or very small veins. They went down there to try and determine whether they could maybe open a second mine somewhere around.' Kili was slightly more enthusiast in his explanation.

-And how did you know to look for me here?' I wondered.

-Well. The others couldn't find you anywhere and no one saw you going out. It only made sense that you were still in the mountain. We were here with our uncle earlier and we used to come and play in those corridors.' Fili started to explain.

-Play? In here?' I interrupted him, disbelievingly.

-Aye! Our Ma would usually come down there yelling and she would scold us for being reckless dunderheads.' Kili replied happily, making me smile.

-Any way, we volunteered to have a look around here and it's a good thing we did, right?' Fili smirked at me and I felt a slight blush on my cheeks, ashamed to have lost my way so stupidly.

-Thanks for that." I simply answered.

It took us one hour, or so Fili said, to walk back in the habited parts of the Halls. As we walked in the main hall where I had met the King for the first time, I saw quite a crowd and it stopped me dead in my track.

Surely they weren't here to wait for me, right?

Fili realized I had stopped and looked at me questioningly.

"Are you alright Amelia?

-Why are all these people here?' I squeaked in a low whisper and to my horror he smirked.

-Well milady, a good part of them has been looking around for you and gathered back here after I suppose."

Oh the shame. Oh the horror.

How could I face them all? I was absentmindedly playing with the beads in my braid, wondering whether I should just run away back into the dark corridors and die from shame there when I spotted a well known face among the crowd. And just because of that forlorn face I couldn't run away, I had to go to him and apologize profusely.

"Ori!" I exclaimed and quickly jogged to him.

He had turned quickly when he heard me and all discussion had stopped in the Hall, but I didn't care because Ori, once he saw me, smiled for the first time in days. I embraced him warmly and was happy to feel him respond to my hug in an equal manner.

"Ori, I'm so sorry. I got lost again in the tunnels.

-Are you alright? Are you hurt?' he asked worriedly stepping back from our hug to luck at me at arm's length.

-I'm perfectly fine, just tired and famished!"

A booming laugh resonated behind me and I blushed terribly at the scene I had just displayed for all the dwarves to see.

"Oy lass, if you want'd to 'ave a visit o' the caves, you should 'ave ask'd!"

I recognized him as one of the miners who had been severely hurt and my eyes instantly narrowed at him.

"What are you doing here? You should be in bed."

This time the laugh was coming from various well known voices. Bofur, Danà and Dís were close. Looking around to find them, my eyes met those I really wished not to see. My gaze instantly went to the floor as my blood froze in my veins.

"I remember telling Dori, while you were standing right here' he pointed at a spot on the floor nearby 'That I didn't want you to roam about alone. There was a reason to that, you're just like a child, stupidly running around and causing everyone to worry."

There was an uneasy shift in the crowd and everyone remained silent.

I really hated being scolded like a child when really my only fault was to have a supremely bad sense of directions. Suddenly the anger I had felt in the darkness of the corridors came back to bubble inside my chest. I suddenly lifted my gaze and looked straight into the King's eyes.

"I'm sorry my lord, but really, you should put doors, barriers or at least some signs to prevent stupid children to get lost.

-I beg your pardon?' Ooh he was angry, well I was too and I was the one who had spent a night worrying in those creepy corridors.

-I'm serious. It's monstrously dangerous in there. I didn't want to go down there. I got lost and I'm sorry I caused troubles to everyone, really I am. But you should put some signs, all those freaky corridors look exactly the same. I'm even surprised we managed to go back out and, I'm sorry to say, but I'm still not convinced there wasn't a shorter way back up."

The last part I had said while turning towards the two younger dwarves. Fili turned to face the King and talked before the icy eyes could kill me on the spot.

"She's kind of right there uncle. Even Kili and I got lost more than once in there and we lost time backtracking repeatedly."

This dwarf was the nephew of the King? Then he was Dís' son, one of the two troublemakers. I glanced toward the woman and she offered me a small, warm smile. I was brought back to the discussion with the King when he finally spoke.

"Very well. I'll see to it we find a way for headless people not to get lost anymore."

Hem, the last part was for me, clearly, but I couldn't be offended as he wasn't really wrong there.

Soon all the dwarves were dismissed and I stayed with Ori and the royal family in the room. I cleared my throat and turned towards the younger dwarves.

"Thank you, both of you. I was really starting to think I'll starve alone in there.' Turning back toward the King I simply said 'And I'm truly sorry for this whole mess. I just wanted to find someone's house and misunderstood the directions. I'm really sorry and I won't walk around alone again if I go in some new places, I swear."

The King observed me and nodded before answering in a calm voice that anger had left.

"You have to understand, these Halls are made, sculpted in natural cavities. There are many tricks and natural traps in some corridors. You were lucky to come out of it at all.

-I know that. I understand what you mean, and you are right of course.

-Don't go in unknown parts unaccompanied. Dwarves have a good instinct when we're underground; it's a part of what we are. You may live here with us, but you're still human. Our halls may prove dangerous for you."

I nodded, expressing my understanding silently.

"I'll be more careful, I promise. My mind was preoccupied and I didn't stop to think when I first realized I got lost. That was my first mistake. It won't happen again.

-I'm sure it won't. Go back to your place now."

I slightly bowed my head and turned toward Ori who had been, just like Dís, a silent witness. Before I could say anything though, Danà caught me in a very tight embrace and when she freed me, Bofur came to pat my shoulder.

"You gave us quite a scare there, lass.

-I'm truly sorry for that." And I really meant it.

They all ignored it and simply told me to try and be more careful. I was quite impressed by their abilities to forgive my mistakes. Still, I wouldn't complain about that. After being scolded, slightly, by the King, I was glad my friends weren't angry at me. As we were slowly retreating, I asked Ori, who was holding my arm.

"Ori, do you think we'll find something warm to eat at this time?

-I'm sure there'd be some stew, dawn isn't far and Bombur was awake all night long, waiting for news from you.' He said with a soft smile, guiding me towards the dining hall.

-He was? Oh my, I really caused trouble to many people, didn't I?' I said forlornly

-Don't be like that. We were worried because we care."

His simple way of presenting this, made tears pool in my eyes. I was thankful that Danà and Bofur had chosen to walk a bit ahead of us, it was a nice gesture. I quickly brushed the few tears away and smiled at one of my favourite dwarves.

"Thanks Ori, you're an amazing friend."

* * *

What was supposed to be a quick bite of hot stew, ended up in an impossibly large improvised party. The kind only dwarves I believe are able to organize in such short notice. Barrels of ale were rolled into the room, Bombur and the other cooks presented us with roasted meat, stewed meat, braised meat, ham, cheeses, lots of breads, cakes and pastries and few vegetables and fruits.

I was forced to sit at the centre of the main table when Bofur winked at me and quickly stepped on the table. Quickly people around quieted down all eyes were on him.

"Oy, lads, lasses, do you wish to hear an old, famously adventurous story?"

A general roar and a rain of applause made him bow lowly before starting with his story.

"There was once a lady, a maiden really now that I think about it. Well she wasn't so much of a maiden and more of a strange little lass. So there was this lady, who was a maiden, who was a strange little lass, who once decided to go explore the whole wide world. Well, she ended up in an old abandoned dwarf's mine."

His playful wink made me smile as I listened to his silly story.

"She ended up roaming the halls, which couldn't be called halls as it was more caves. And when I say cave, I mean dark, damp corridors that weaved endlessly in the mountain's belly. So there she was, mindlessly walking in those halls, well caves, when suddenly… an impossibly loud roar troubled the calm and peace of the place."

I was surprised to see everyone so silent, listening intently as Bofur created his story in front of us. I found myself quite engrossed in his tale, even though I knew perfectly well that he was mocking me.

"The cheeky lass, who was a maiden, who was really more of a strange little lady, came up with the idea that a wild dragon was sleeping under her feet. She didn't think twice about it, and immediately decided to do what every incredibly witted person would do…she went deeper into the mountain."

Some chuckles were already being heard around as Bofur was putting on quite the show, gesturing and mimicking wildly, kicking plates out of his way and looking around at his audience.

"After awhile being lost, well she wasn't really lost as she knew perfectly where she was, that is under the mountain in a magnificent dwarf's Hall, or more realistically a dingy corridor. She still kept on following the melodious sound of the beast's voice which roared and roared to no end."

From the corner of my eyes I could see the King's nephew elbowing each other and smirking. The King wasn't far behind them, he stood with Balin and Dís and they all were listening to Bofur.

"Arriving at a corner she realized the majestic deathly creature with wings was in the next room. The roars were gone now and she tiptoed into the corridor, preparing herself for anything and everything really. Bursting in she ended up facing two foolish dwarflings who got lost themselves in the old paths. They were dwarves though, so following their mighty instinct they had ended up in the old cellars where ageless barrels of ale had been stored. No sooner were the barrels found that they were opened as well. Lost, the three of them still are."

Bofur turned and faced me, his eyes twinkled mischievously and he asked loudly, though I knew he was speaking to me directly.

"And do you know what the moral of this tiny story is?"

I shrugged and said

"Don't trust dwarves as architects unless you wish to live in a maze?"

My silly banter was quite successful and many dwarves burst into fit of laughter. Bofur shook his head and waited for some lull in the laughs before saying.

"Nope. That wasn't it, but I like yours better so we shall keep it."

Everyone cheered as he bowed once more and jumped back on the floor, quickly grabbing a tankard of ale and entering one drinking contest or another.

* * *

All in all it was quite late in the morning when Ori and I finally arrived back home. To be honest neither of us was walking straight, though my unsure steps were caused equally from tiredness and the ale I had finally accepted to drink.

The dwarves' cheers as I chugged down my very first tankard of ale had been deafening. And the result was the following situation; I was tipsy, well drunk really, tired and unable to walk straight.

Ori on his part was really way past tipsy. He was totally drunk too and I had been afraid at some point that he wouldn't find his way back home. When I had voiced my concern though, he had heartily laughed and had simply started to walk.

Now we were laughing loudly without any real reason when we crossed the threshold, holding on each other. We stumbled in, wobbling on our feet and laughing at our own antics when a startled and concerned voice exclaimed.

"There you are! What were you doing?

-Nori!" I joyously cried out.

I don't believe my brain was functioning at that instant for I found it was perfectly natural for me to run to him, jump in his arm and had I not been wearing a dress, my legs would have been circling his waist. I was clinging to him strongly, obviously happy to see him back.

The surprised dwarf staggered and managed in extremis to find his balance. His arms encircled my waist, holding me up against him, and he blinked at me.

"Are you alright?"

I opened my mouth to answer but my brain decided to shut down and I couldn't find any words to say. Nori seemed to sniff slightly in my direction then glanced at Ori who was chuckling madly, leaning against a chair. Well he was actually falling on it very slowly which made me chuckle too.

"Are you both drunk? What have you been doing? I was mad with worry!

-You should ask Bofur, he made a funny tale about this girl who went in the mountain and got lost. I'm so proud, it's the first time I am someone's muse. It was so funny when he said it and then we drank and the others were laughing and…' I rambled without taking a breath.

-Stop." Nori said firmly though nicely, smirking at me.

I obeyed without even thinking and closed my mouth, awaiting the next order. I looked into his grey eyes, discerning both amusement and concern in them. I smiled widely at him. Ale and exhaustion apparently made me foolishly happy.

"Breathe" There it was.

Breathing in and out deeply, I slowly started to feel lightheaded.

"I'm tired" I whispered, letting my head fall on his shoulder.

How many times had I found myself in such a position already? At that moment I didn't care. I nuzzled my nose further in his beard while Nori gently held me up in his arms and carried me back to my bedroom. He held me close to him and I felt oddly content. I hummed slightly in his beard, eyes closed.

My mouth was apparently entirely disconnected from my brain as I started to ramble again.

"Your beard is so soft, so comfortable. I like it."

I was too tired and drunk to feel his steps falter at that. I didn't see his face either but had I been conscious of my surroundings and words at the time, I would have guessed Nori's cheeks were now red as ripe tomatoes.

I would have been right.

* * *

When I woke up, I was disorientated and I had the urgent need to press both my hands on my temples, trying to make the pounding stop. I had this picture in the forefront of my mind of a small army of dwarves stuck in my head and trying to get out. I groaned and muttered an unintelligible 'stop it' to said army, to no avail unfortunately.

Slowly sitting up I let my bare feet fall on the cool stone floor. The coldness of the rock brought me slowly back to reality and I could finally start to gather my thoughts. I couldn't remember anything past Bofur's story.

I slowly stood up, noticed I was still fully clothed and leaned heavily on the wall for support. With difficulties I managed to walk towards the kitchen. When I pushed the door opened, I grunted at the light and noise. I didn't pay attention to anyone and made my way to the bench, falling on it more than sitting.

Eyes barely opened and vision blurry I felt around with my hands to find something to eat. I could hear whispers and chuckles around and I groaned loudly when someone put a large tankard in front of me. I tried to push it away from my sight, earning some more chuckles when a voice I knew quite well told me.

"It's water. Drink some."

My feelings toward the tankard changed radically and I grabbed it quickly, before avidly drinking the fresh liquid. Then the same kind hand put some bread and honey cakes in front of my eyes and I could have cried from happiness.

As I ate, my brain finally decided to kick in and start working. I blinked a few times and glanced around, recognizing Bofur, Bifur and Bombur with Nori and Ori. Bofur cheeky smirk didn't help with my headache and the food and water in my stomach didn't help my mood.

"Don't you have a house?" I grunted at Bofur who only chuckled.

I sighed deeply, holding my head in my hands and eyes closed. Why did I drink so much? What happened and what time was it now? I was too tired and lazy to ask those questions but they still bugged me. I concentrated on Bofur's voice to discern the meaning of his words.

"Well, we do have a house."

I knew he was tempting me on purpose, I knew he would have a cheeky reply. Yet I couldn't find it in myself to stay silent.

"Then why, pray tell, don't you go there?

-Well after your adventures, I'm afraid to get lost in our dwarfish maze."

I glared at him and groaned loudly.

"I hate you, you know?

-Nope. You love me for I'm full of charms!" He dared reply happily and damned it but he was right.

I glanced at Nori and was slightly taken aback by his clear lack of amusement. He appeared to be quite annoyed with something. Looking at Ori I found my dear sweet friend looking both sheepish and put out. I frowned but chose to remain silent as Bofur and the other two were here.

"What time is it?' I chose to ask instead.

-A little after dawn.' Bombur gently replied while taking another serving of scrambled eggs on his plate.

-How is that possible?' I stupidly came up with.

-Well, when one sleep off his ale for a whole day and night…he tends not to remember much of the time passing.

-Bofur, I say it again and I mean it, I hate you."

He gave me a toothy grin in reply and I sighed. Nori and Ori were still silent and it was greatly disturbing me, for I felt something had happened while I slept off the alcohol. Head still pounding I drank some more water to rehydrate and then moaned to no one in particular.

"Next time, please, remind me not to drink so much.

-Oh that'd be a shame to do so lass!

-Bofur…' This man never stopped.

-You were wonderfully adapting to our culture. Chugging tankards after tankards, everyone was impressed.' He said nodding and smiling 'And you were most amusing when you started to participate in drinking games with us."

He sent me another cheeky wink before finally saying.

"Yep, you definitely drank like a dwarf back then!

-Well I'm not that proud of it you know.' I eyed him and said 'And how come I'm the only one feeling hangover now?

-Well you drink like a dwarf…but you're really just a little human girl, no way you'd be able to take your ale as well as we do!

-Bloody alcoholics" I muttered when he started to laugh heartily.

* * *

**A/N: Thanks to everyone who reads this story and those of you who reviews :) **

**I hope you enjoyed this chapter and the apparition of Fili and Kili, and don't worry, I'll explain Nori's behaviour. **

**I'll try to update Monday, but it might be complicated. Anyway you'll have the next chapter early next week. **

**Thanks for your support! It's greatly appreciated :) **


	12. Hide and Seek

**I don't own anything, except for my OC and the plot.**

* * *

After Bombur finished the plates of food left on the table, he Bifur and Bofur decided it was high time for them to go to work and they left us, Ori, Nori and me, alone.

I was greatly disturbed by the heavy silence and growing tension that immediately started to build up as soon as the entrance door closed behind Bifur's back.

I eyed the two brothers, feeling entirely too hangover to deal with siblings issues, I could barely remember what happened during the previous night. I sighed though, preparing myself for what would likely be a complicated and heated discussion. I suddenly wished Dori was here, he at least knew his brothers perfectly. I was certain he would only need to look at them to understand what was happening.

I had no clue why they both seemed to grow angrier and angrier. I honestly couldn't believe they were angry at me but I couldn't be sure. We remained in silence for awhile, sitting in the kitchen, each one at one of the table's corners. Nori and Ori were currently trying to burn holes in the table with their eyes and I was glancing from one to the other.

"Well, what's going on? Something's wrong?" I simply said.

How I wished I had simply shut up and had decided to simply go back to sleep. As soon as I spoke Nori's eyes found mine and I realized how upset and angry he actually was. I instinctively moved back a bit and his eyes widened slightly before he averted his look.

Ori was still silent and I repeated my question, sliding closer to him and nudging him slightly on the shoulder when Nori finally decided to speak. He didn't look at us though.

"You could have been hurt, that's what's wrong." He snapped.

I blinked. Again? We were back to that 'you could be hurt, we, strong men, protect you, poor women' talk? And here I thought something really important had happened.

"I'm fine. Are you angry at me because I got lost?" I was astonished at the idea he could be angry because of such a thing.

After all I hadn't run away. I hadn't desired to get lost. I had tried to find my way back. And most of all, I was here now and nothing had happened besides the King's scolding.

"I'm not angry at you for getting lost, I'm angry at Ori for letting it happen." He growled, rubbing his eyes with one of his hands.

At hearing his name I glanced toward Ori. Now I could see he wasn't angry as such as he was…wait was it shame he felt? Anger started to rise in my chest and I glared at Nori who still avoided looking back at me. Ori had no reason to feel guilty. He hadn't even known I wanted to go and see Bofur. Besides he had been so obviously worried and relieved when I had been found.

"I'm sorry, what? How can you be angry at him?" I snapped.

Apparently my tone both stupefied and angered Nori some more. He ended up glaring at me and I saw him exhale and inhale slowly.

"It shouldn't have happened. Ori was responsible of you in my and Dori's absence." He growled, grinding his teeth.

My eyes narrowed at him and my anger grew tenfold.

"It's not his fault I got lost in the Halls. He wasn't even here.

-That's the point, he should have!' Nori snapped back

-I'm not a child! I don't need someone holding my hand and walk me everywhere!' I shouted exasperated.

-Clearly you do!" He yelled back at me, his control finally snapping.

From the corner of my eyes I could see Ori staring at us, wide eyed and open mouthed. Clearly he hadn't expected me to yell back at Nori. He was obviously too astonished to speak. At the same time I could feel a vicious, boiling feeling brewing in my chest, waiting to explode and break loose.

I didn't know whether it was because my head was already pounding, or whether it was justified anger on my part, but I wasn't about to let Ori down. I had to defend him. I just had to.

I glared at Nori who glared right back at me.

"And where were you?' I asked in a much too sweetly tone. 'You disappeared without even saying goodbye. Ori was clearly upset and I was worried. You have absolutely no right to scold him for something he had no influence on.

-I have every right to scold him! I'm his brother!" clearly the first part of my speech had been lost in his stubborn mind.

I felt anger boil in my veins and a strange realization came to my mind. I was going to slap him, I knew it. If he kept on being so damn stubborn I might just do it. That dwarf was going to learn to behave in a proper manner, I swear.

"Being his brother doesn't give you the right to behave like an ass! I was lost, and found back! No harm was done. Now let's forget about it.' I insisted.

-You could have been hurt! You don't realize how dangerous those caves can be. Anything could have happened. It was his duty to protect you in our absence, he didn't. He didn't even manage to bring you home properly; you were both completely drunk and arrived in the morning. I was waiting for you guys, sick with worry!

-And we were sick with worry for you for weeks!' I screeched. 'If I chose to get drunk that's my business, not yours. Ori has been great, wonderful even during all the time I've known him." I shouted at him, standing up and moving around the table.

I was standing next to him right now. Pointing a finger right at his scowling face I snarled.

"And don't try and tell me what the risks and consequences are. I know them as much as you do. I am the healer. I am the one who sees injured dwarves every week. I am the one with their blood on my hands."

I knew I was exaggerating this but his reaction had been uncalled for. When I saw his eyes narrow at me and his mouth open I knew I had to say something before he actually managed to say words I couldn't forgive.

When I spoke I couldn't recognize my own voice for the one I heard was cold and unfeeling.

"If you desire so much to point fingers at guilty people, then my dear, you shall point at yourself. I got lost to begin with because I tried to find someone who could tell me where the bloody hell you disappeared and how I could cheer up Ori."

I took a step back from him, not looking at him I glanced toward Ori. The next words I said were in my most caring voice.

"Ori, I'll see you later. Take care and don't worry I would never, ever even think about holding you responsible for this mess. I just need to change my mind for now."

I managed to smile at him before turning away. I stepped out of the kitchen. It didn't take long though before Nori caught up with me and stopped me. He caught my wrist and forced me to face him. He looked furious. The fact that his wrath was directed at me hurt me more than I could have imagined it would. His grey eyes were clouded with rage and his braided brows were deeply furrowed.

"Don't you understand I'm entitled to be worried?' He growled.

-I told you already, behaving like you do is inexcusable. You're not entitled to behave like this.' I snapped.

-Can't you imagine what it felt like, coming home at dawn, believing you're all safe and sound in your rooms and waiting for you to wake up just to find out after hours that you all but disappeared? I had no idea where Ori or you were. I had no idea where to look for you. I could only wait here, useless. Can you imagine what thoughts crossed my mind?" He growled.

Even though I was listening to him, even though he managed to make me feel slightly guilty, I still couldn't muzzle my anger. Nori took a deep breath, closing his eyes for a second and then looked once more directly in my eyes.

"Then you come back after dawn, both drunk, do you imagine how I could have felt?' He groaned, teeth gritted.

-Yes, I imagine perfectly.' I interrupted him, still too angry to have a normal conversation with him. 'You left us alone without giving us a word, not even a goodbye. Maybe your brothers are used to your behaviour, but I am not. I was worried. Ori was sad. What was I to do?

-Not getting bloody lost in those unused corridors!" He snapped.

We glared at each other and I felt my heart tear slightly. It hurt. It hurt like hell to get cross with Nori. He wasn't supposed to glare at me, he was supposed to hold me safe. Still, I couldn't condone his attitude towards both Ori and me. I squared my shoulders, holding his intense gaze.

"I had to wait.' He said in a much lower tone, though still obviously furious. 'I had to wait until this morning for Bofur's bloody happy chatter to learn you had gotten lost. And then you behave like nothing happen, happily chatting away with him, like everything's normal, like you don't care.

-Because it's nothing…' I tried to say before he cut me.

-It's not! You could have died down there, and then what? What do you think I…we'd have felt like?

-You try to put the blame on me. Like I said, had you been there, had I known where you were in the first place, I wouldn't have roamed around in the Halls. Think about your own behaviour and how it affects the others before trying to change mine!" I finally snarled at him, fuming.

I turned away and felt Nori's hand trying to grab my wrists once more but I quickly jerked away from him, not even glancing in his direction, and said in the coldest voice I had ever used.

"Don't you dare touch me or talk to me until you finally understand I might be your ward but I'm not your puppet to order around. I'm not to be imprisoned for fear I'll break at the softest breeze."

I walked briskly through the main door, resisting barely the urge to slam it behind me. I roamed the corridor in an angry haste, vision blurred and my mind frantic with fury. I needed to occupy my thoughts with something or I'd go back there to slap that dwarf.

Had I paid attention I would have heard a dull thud resonating behind me. Had I been a little mouse, maybe I would have seen Nori punching the door violently behind me. Maybe I would have seen that he was just as upset as I was about our dispute. Maybe I would have seen how hurt he was.

I wasn't a little mouse though.

I saw nothing.

I couldn't know.

As I walked quickly through the corridors, the thought struck me that I could actually start to work on one of my little ideas. Now seemed actually like the perfect time for it, as it would free my mind from my current problems.

When I burst through the doors of the main hall I quickly looked around and was relieved to see the dwarf I had been looking for. I slowed down my rapid pace for I realized he was currently speaking with the King and Dís. I went as close as I dared and stopped quite some steps away, letting them continue their discussion privately.

The King had seen me and his intense gaze observed me for a while as Balin spoke. He didn't say a word, or at least I didn't see his mouth move, and he simply nodded in my direction. Balin looked around and smiled once he saw me, gesturing for me to come forward. His smile diminished though when he saw my scowl and I could see Dís was curious about it.

"How are you my dear? Is something the matter?"

His voice was kind and showed his concern. I inhaled slowly and schooled my feature into a more neutral mask. I first turned toward the King and bowed my head.

"I am deeply sorry to intrude on your conversation Mister Thorin, and I assure you my queries could wait if you have important matter at hand. I just needed to ask Mister Balin something. "

I was as polite as I could. I didn't call him King for I remembered perfectly he told me not to, but I still couldn't quite call him simply Thorin. Ori had explained to me he wasn't really King for his kingdom was far away and had been taken. Yet he remained their leader and had allowed me to stay. It was enough to deserve my respect, or some of it, at least for now.

He nodded and answered in his deep, gruff voice.

"Speak your queries; we are listening, unless you wish for me and my sister to leave you alone with Balin."

I shook my head no and turned to look at the white bearded dwarf

"I was simply wondering whether you could show me to a meticulous smith. I know there are forges, mines and smiths around but I think everyone will agree I should probably not try and find them myself."

Balin and Dís smirked while Thorin's mouth quirked, slightly before his usual frown was back.

"Why do you need a smith for?' Balin asked as I glanced to Dís.

-Well, you see, I think there could be some improvements in the ward's equipments. Where I come from there is a wide variety of tools surgeons, healers, use in order to work efficiently.

-Do you think such tools are needed?' Dís asked, instantly curious and interested by the topic.

-Some of them might not, but then again it wouldn't hurt to be prepared. It's nothing much really just smaller, precise metallic tools that could be really useful in events such as the one that happened a few weeks ago.' I explained calmly.

-What kind of tools are you thinking of?' I was surprised to hear the King ask.

-Well, first I'd like some very thin, very small and very, very sharp blades. We call them scalpels. They are really useful and allow cutting precise wounds thus diminishing the damages inflicted on the patient.

-Why would you want to cut your patient?' Balin looked surprised.

-Well…' I started before Dís intervened.

-We had the case of someone bleeding in the insides. She cut him open, sew the inside wound and the cut and he's now alive."

Apparently my reputation as a butcher hadn't travelled that far into the halls. I had to add something though for Balin and the King were clearly impressed and it made me uneasy.

"Well, it was nothing short of a miracle that he survived. Trust me on this, many complications could have happened and killed him. I'm actually surprised he survived.

-Well, he survived so take the compliments given freely.' Dís insisted and I rolled my eyes.

-Anyway, a finer blade would have been useful back then. I'd like to make some sort of pliers, if there's a wound with an object inside, stone, wood or the likes, it might prove useful. I'd like to have scissors too and different types of needles, in various shapes and sizes.

-Don't you have similar objects already?' Balin asked Dís who simply shrugged.

-You have to understand; I'd like to have them in different sizes and, if possible, made of copper.

-Copper?' The King repeated questioningly.

-I thought you knew, seeing as many pots and jars are already made of this metal.' I was truly surprised they didn't seem to know.

-What do you mean? We use mainly copper simply because there's a large vein we're currently exploiting.

-Well copper as a natural tendency to prevent the propagation of bacteria…

-Bacteria?" The three of them asked.

Oh dear.

There started a very long discussion that took too much time before it turned back from my medical explanations to a more practical discussion of what exactly I wanted to have made. During that time I discovered that the King was actually quite a competent smith, renowned around for his weapons, mostly swords.

Together with him, Dís and Balin, we went toward a study room where we discussed in more details the types of objects I would need. The rest of my day was spent with them, bent on a table looking at parchments were I tried my best to draw what I needed. The King was surprisingly interested and he soon asked me many questions. Dís helped me a lot, I could explain with more ease to her what I wanted the tools to do and she then translated in more technical terms what the smith should do.

All in all we spent the whole day all together and I soon forgot about the problems that awaited me in the brothers' house.

* * *

When I went back home that night, Ori was alone and Nori had left. When Ori told me this news I felt my knees go weak and I had to quickly sit on the nearest chair. I lifted my hand to my forehead, closing my eyes for a minute. When I glanced back up, Ori was still sitting in front of me, his gaze fixed on the fire in the hearth.

"Ori' I sighed 'Oh Ori I'm so, so sorry. I didn't mean…I was just. I was so upset, so angry, I didn't mean to…' Ori stopped me there.

-Don't. Don't feel guilty for that. Nori has always been like this. He's just as protective as Dori, he just hide it more. Yet he comes and goes when he wants, uncaring of what we feel, of what I feel. ' Ori sounded so bitter it physically hurt me.

-Still. I should have been more polite, more diplomatic.' I insisted softly, lowering my head.

-Actually I think he was more shocked by how close your reaction was to that of our Ma's when she was upset because of Da. Most dwarvish women have strong character, especially those living here. Exile tends to harden people." He said smiling a shy toothy grin.

I smiled back and then we remained silent for awhile before Ori went to grab his notebook and started to ask me questions about my world. It had become quite a tradition, a habit between us, to sit companionably and share our knowledge and thoughts. More often than not Ori would scribble away on his notebook and that made me smile to see him so focused.

It felt natural to see him like this. I enjoyed seeing him like this, he looked so passionate, so absorbed by his notebook. It was impressive to witness that. Ori was usually soft spoken and almost shy, but when he was writing in his notebook, he had such a serious look that you couldn't ignore the fact that he wasn't a little boy.

I smiled softly at this now usual sight.

"You should be a librarian Ori, or a scholar, anything to do with research and dusty tomes really." I finally decided to speak my mind that night.

He froze and I could see his face looked more forlorn. I quickly worried that I'd say something awful to him and I went to apologize when he spoke softly.

"I wish I could, but it's not going to happen."

That surprised me and I couldn't help but ask.

"Why couldn't you?"

Ori seemed to hesitate a bit before he closed his notebook. I could see him furrow his brows slightly and then he answered.

"You see, we have been building these halls for awhile, but we're still having difficulties, monetary difficulties mostly. Even Thorin, who should by right be our King, is forced to work daily in the forges. Fili, his heir, is working there too when he's not training with the guards, as is Kili, his younger brother.

-Is the situation that bad?

-Thorin chose to install our settlement here at first because of the natural caves. We didn't need so many dwarves to carve and dig the mountain. Like this the others could work and try to make some money. Right now there's the problem that we haven't really found anything really precious in the mines. There's silver and copper in quantities but no gold, no precious gems, no mithril, or at least not in sufficient quantities for the gems. We're highly dependent on our trades and partners.

-I see. With a situation so dire, libraries, books and research are not really things one would concentrate on to earn his share.

-Well, it's not really useful for the community in the short time future. Maybe later, when we'll be luckier, then our halls will shine with wealth and massive room would be set up, shelves of carved stone in the walls and rows upon rows of books and rolls.

-I'd like to see that.' I smiled.

-Aye. It is said that Erebor had such libraries in its depth. One day, if we're lucky enough, our kingdom will shine again and any dwarf, man or elf, would want to have the honour to walk our halls, to see our treasures, to catch a glimpse of our majestic rooms where ageless knowledge will be hidden."

I could see the light shine in his eyes and it hurt to see it disappear as soon as reality set back in his mind, shooing his dreams away too easily.

"One day Ori, I'm sure one day those dreams will come true. I'll pray for it myself.' I said in a whisper.

-You're kind Amelia." He answered just as lowly.

We didn't speak about his dream again, though I never forgot the light in his eyes and the smile of wonder on his face at the simple idea of his wish becoming true.

That day, maybe for the first time truly, I realized how deeply hurt the dwarves had been. Maybe they were the only ones who could really understand how it could pain me to have been separated from my home.

Yes.

I could understand their pain just as much as they could understand mine.

I wished then that there was a way for them to get their real home back. I wished then that I too could see this Erebor, for the more I heard of it, the more I pictured it as an Eldorado of some sort. I truly wished one day to see my friends' dreams come true.

But I was just a mere homeless human. There was nothing I could do to help them.

I could merely pray.

* * *

Two days later Dori came back.

We organized an improvised feast at home and many dwarves came to welcome the merchant and his team back. I knew all the dwarves present; Bofur, Bifur and Bombur were among the first to arrive and had helped us set up the table and prepare impossibly huge amounts of food.

Then Danà, Gloin, Gimli and Oin had come, arriving with hands full of bread, cheese and cakes made by Danà. Dwalin was here too and sported a new scar on his left forearm that I wanted to inspect but he gruffly refused, growling at me to step back. Hearing from Bofur I had gutted a difficult patient, he let me have a closer look at his injury though and I quickly cleaned it, all the while glaring at a laughing Bofur.

Of course, if Dwalin was here, so was Balin. And with Balin and Dwalin both at our place, I found myself facing the King with wide eyes as he passed through the threshold. My surprise was bigger though when Dís appeared, followed by her two sons who were happily rolling a huge barrel of wine in front of them.

All in all it was a nice, funny evening spent with people I was starting to grow incredibly fond of. By the end of it, I was so drunk though that I called the King by his name only and felt so ashamed that I started to apologize profusely. It went to the point where a laughing Dori guided me back to my room to sleep it off.

The dwarves' drinking habits were starting to rub on me and I wasn't sure I should appreciate that.

The only real thing I noticed though was that Nori wasn't here. I felt mixed feeling of anger and hurt set in my heart.

He didn't come back until a week later.

During this whole time though, my anger against him for leaving once more wordlessly and my hurt at that same action had grown to quite huge proportions. I was actually so angry that I simply refused to acknowledge his presence. To my utter despair, he didn't even try to talk to me.

Suddenly I realized there was quite an important rift between us. I could barely stand being in the same room as him, for his new kind of silence towards me quite simply hurt way too much. I couldn't bear to witness it.

Slowly but surely we started to effectively and efficiently avoid each other. Dori and Ori, if they were aware of the situation, and they surely were, didn't comment on it.

And thus became the longest and most painful game of hide and seek I had ever played. Surely its length and my pain were due to the fact that both Nori and I were hiding, and none of us thought to seek the other.

Nori was clearly good at it. A true expert.

He would disappear for days on end. Weeks even.

His frequent disappearances seemed to put the three of us in a sour mood. Ori would mop around once again, even though my and Dori's presence would manage to cheer him up a bit. Dori would be especially grumpy during Nori's absence, grumbling under his breath about 'Ungrateful dwarves', 'dishonour', 'despicable hobby', 'shameful' and other such things. I didn't understand and didn't ask.

His absence made me cruelly realize how much time I could share with him before this whole mess happened. Of course I was living with the brothers, but Nori seemed to always be there whenever I needed someone. Even when I didn't, actually.

He had this habit, I had noticed, to remain in the corners of the room, more often than not half hidden in the shadows. When I'd look up and around to find him he'd smirk slightly and wink at me. Those two simple gestures were enough to make me happy, and it strangely always worked. I couldn't explain why.

He would always bring me out of my gloomy mood so easily.

* * *

I remembered then, that one time. It was one morning just after one of my nightmares. During that night, he had held me and listened to me as I had told him how much I missed home and especially some of my aunt's cooking. I told him how great she was at baking and how much I loved the sweet pies she made when we were on holidays.

I had woken quite later than usual and was tired and slightly depressed still when I entered the kitchen. Only Nori was there.

"Hey." I said softly.

There was no point in asking any of the usual questions; 'how are you?' 'did you sleep alright?'. It was meaningless when I had woken everyone with a stupid nightmare that had included my aunt and uncle somehow. Nori, evidently, knew that perfectly. It seemed to have become a habit of him to hold me at night.

How weird did that sound?

Anyway, he remained silent, observing my every move with his attentive grey eyes. I sat next to him, still very tired from the lack of sleep, and let out a long sigh. Nori was simply nibbling at an apple, one of the only fruit he enjoyed eating, and watched me from the corner of his eyes.

I simply helped myself to a bit of cheese and bread, not much, I felt too depressed to be hungry. I was about to dive in when Nori surprised me by gently patting my shoulder, still not uttering a word.

I glanced at him but he was looking straight in front of him, munching on the fruit. He then stood up, noiselessly, and walked calmly to the door.

Around that time I shrugged and looked back down at my plate to find a small, cute looking, apple pie.

"Wha…?"

I gasped and looked up.

Nori was leaning on the wall near the door, his apple between his teeth. He looked so carefree, so roguish in that moment. I could see the playful glint in his eyes and the mirth to have managed to both please and surprise me.

I felt my mouth form a huge, gleeful smile. I was sure my own eyes reflected how truly happy I was because of this simple little pie.

He hummed slightly, bit in his apple, and smiled before winking at me and leaving the room.

* * *

That simple memory still made my heart swell with warmth. But nowadays it would immediately turn back cold. My sour mood transformed every little happy memory with Nori into something very painful to think about.

I hated him for leaving like this. I hated him for putting all those little moments aside because of a small mistake. I felt guilty for being quite so harsh with him, but on the other hand I still couldn't forgive how he had treated both Ori and I.

So I remained silent the few times he crossed my path in the corridors or in the kitchen and living room, and feigned disinterest and indifference.

It hurt.

A lot.

I wasn't so stubborn that I couldn't admit it to myself. I missed him. I missed him terribly. I had no idea what to do to apologize and somehow, I didn't feel like I should apologize. I still didn't believe I had been wrong in my words. I may have been blunt, but not wrong.

We were in an impasse.

I just knew Nori wouldn't come to me and apologize, it didn't fit what I knew of his character. I had no idea how he felt about this dispute and I couldn't really ask Ori or Dori about it. I was already afraid that the three brothers were having a tense relationship right now because of me and my stupid dispute with Nori.

There was no solution that I could see working. Maybe I could have simply talked with him, but the more I waited, the more difficult it seemed to become.

When had it been difficult to talk to Nori?

Why had I let that happen?

I really couldn't stand this situation.

On my part I then started to hide in the healing wards. I suddenly couldn't spend enough time there. Then one evening I decided to simply stay there for a whole night, I lay on one of the beds and fell asleep from exhaustion.

When I woke up the next morning, I saw a small cup of now cold chamomile and it brought tears in my eyes knowing Dori would have bothered looking for me. It didn't stop me though and I started to sleep regularly in the wards until the day were Dís decided she'd had enough of my overzealous attitude.

It had been exactly sixteen days since the last time I had seen Nori, and at the time I had only caught a glimpse of him as he exited the living room when I came in from the kitchen. All in all I had no idea how long this stupid situation had lasted or how long it would last still.

I was silently working in the wards when Dís came to see me.

"You have got to stop this nonsense. What has got into you these past weeks? You've been nothing but moody and gloomy these past few months. Even your new shiny tools didn't cheer you up."

Instinctively I glanced at the small cupboard where I knew my 'shiny tools' as Dís put it, were properly organized and tidied up in a leather satchel. It wasn't true what she said, I remembered being extremely happy at receiving them. The quality of the work done by the dwarves had amazed me, but maybe I hadn't expressed it that much.

I sighed and looked at Dís who continued her rant.

"Seriously, what has happened for you to turn into such a ghost of the girl we all met?

-Nothing happened Dís. I just, I miss home.' I tried to placate her worries with this thought but utterly failed.

-I don't believe you. I'm sure you miss your home, but I'd like to believe you're starting to see our Halls as a home too. Tell me what happened, I might help you solve this problem that's been eating at you for months.

-Dís please, don't. There's truly nothing you can do. It's just. I made a mess of a situation and I can't see an end to it, that's all."

Her eyes narrowed at me and I just looked straight back at her.

"Every situation can be solved.' She said seriously.

-Not true" I replied automatically.

We remained silent for a few minutes and I could feel her eyes following my every move as I readied some plants, intent on preparing some more ointments with them to replenish our stock. I could feel she was about to talk and beat her to it.

"Look Dís, I appreciate your concern, I really do. But there's truly nothing you can do to help me so please, don't insist.

-I worry for you. Danà does too. She told me she hasn't seen you in quite awhile and when she does, you're not yourself. Even Oin has realized something was up. Mahal every dwarf working at the market knows something's wrong with you!' She said in a sudden motherly tone that made my hands slightly shake.

-You really don't have to worry. I'm fine. I just need time to adapt to some things, it's all. I swear if you could help me I'd come and talk to you.

-Would you really?' She snorted slightly doubting my words.

-I swear I would."

I waited some more time before glancing at her with a small smile.

"Look, I really appreciate your concern, but right now I really want to focus on the ointments. Don't mind me, I'll stay here to prepare them and I swear I'll go back home as soon as they're done."

I saw a small smirk on her face and couldn't understand why she suddenly appeared so happy with herself. Dís had been annoyed not a second ago and now she had this strange knowing glint in her eyes that made me shiver uncomfortably. Still she decided to leave me alone in the wards for that evening.

I was enjoying the sudden calm and peacefulness that surrounded me. Listening to the bubbling ingredients I was slowly putting in a small cauldron, I was entirely focused on my task. It helped me keep my mind blank of everything else, it helped me forget for a short moment, the forlorn thoughts that plagued me.

When there was nothing for me to do but wait I started to let my mind wander. Strangely for the first time in awhile I felt glad to be alone for it allowed me to analyze my own mind and feelings.

Nori's absence and the distance between us was quite obviously the cause to my poor mood. There was no denying that and I was certain Dori and Ori knew it too.

I was a forgetful person. I wasn't stubborn, not really, not when it mattered. And Nori had mattered. Nori mattered still. I missed him and his friendly wink and his small smirks. I missed the small fights and banters we'll have, mostly about who'd get to eat the last sausage at breakfast. I missed the simple gestures he'd do to make me feel better, like forcing himself to eat whatever veggie meal I had prepared.

I missed his comforting presence by my side.

I missed him quite simply.

I suddenly wished to see him right here and then, whatever the cost may be.

Little did I know that later that night my wish would come true and our little 'hide and seek' game would end with me being the unhappy winner.

* * *

**A/N: Huge thanks to the three reviewers :) that's always nice to receive some feedback.**

**I really hope you'll all keep enjoying this story :)**

**So... I wonder what your reactions will be about that chapter. I hope I did manage to surprise you a bit with this little dispute and I hope you enjoyed the chapter overall.**

**Any way, I just wanted to say; I know some of you wonder about Nori (What he's thinking, feeling...) but I don't think I will change the POV. I really only want to follow Amelia's POV. It's really up to you to interpret his actions. (Still, being a nice person, I do offer some hints here and there).**

**About copper: it has been proved (to my knowledge) that copper has indeed natural properties. I know that in some hospitals, it is being used (for example as doorknobs)**

**And now...I don't know when I'll update next (probably at least once before the weekend) I'm quite sick and my mind is a bit fuzzy (I apologize if this chapter and the previous one have more mistakes than usual)**

**BUT next chapter will finally answer to one of the most recurrent question I've been asked :D**


	13. Nori's Secret

**I do not own anything. Everything belongs to JRR Tolkien, except for my OC and the plot.**

* * *

I had been waiting for the preparation I had made to cool down. I was entirely alone in the wards. It had become such a usual occurrence for me to stay here at night that I really didn't pay much attention to what was going on around. The first night I had been quite fidgety, startling at each noise I heard, now I was already used to the muffled sounds that from time to time echoed through the empty halls.

Putting back the dried plants I had in hands in their rightful place I tidied quickly the falling dried leaves before going back to my preparation. It took me two more hours to finish the ointment and put it in a large jar. I'll have to separate it into smaller pot but that could wait.

Remembering the promise I had given Dís, I quickly glanced around, checking everything was at its rightful place, and finally left. I wasn't afraid anymore to walk in the dark paths for I knew them quite well now.

I was absentmindedly walking, thinking about one thing or the other, and it didn't take me long to arrive in front of our house's door. I used my key and turned the doorknob, passing through the threshold while wondering why the knob had felt strangely different. I looked at my hand, walking in, to find it covered with something dark and sticky.

My frown deepened while I pushed the door back close with my feet. The only light in the living room came from the dying fire in the hearth. My eyes were focused on my hand when I stumbled over something that shouldn't be here and fell most ungraciously on the stone floor.

Hitting it quite violently I yelped and cursed loudly, wondering which of the three brothers had had the great idea to leave a large bag in the passage way. Feeling around for that stupid bag, my hands touched once more something sticky and strangely warm.

It took me a few seconds more to feel for something covered in leather.

My tiredness and the late hour were probably to blame for the time it took me to realize what I was grabbing. It was only when I felt a beard beneath my fingers that I finally found out what I was touching. There was a body on the floor.

I blinked.

What was a body doing here?

And then it all clicked in my mind. The sticky substance was obviously blood. My healer training kicked in and my brain started to gear up. I needed light, quickly and probably some help to put the injured patient somewhere else than our floor. At the time though, it didn't occur to my mind who could be lying there, bleeding next to me.

"Help! Anyone help!" I yelled as loudly as I could.

My hands were still on the body, trying to feel for his neck and check for a pulse. It's only about then that I realized who was lying cold and unconscious under my fingers. I could recognize this braided beard easily enough, even in the dark. I didn't need to feel for his hair to confirm it.

"Nori" I whispered and a lump formed in my throat.

He was lying on his side and I had apparently stumbled on his feet. I crawled a bit to get closer to him and patted his back to try and feel for an injury there. Feeling nothing I cautiously pushed him so that he lay in a flat position.

Meanwhile I could hear some noise from the rooms; clearly the two other had been awakened by my scream but were taking their sweet times to come.

"Oy! Move your asses I need you here now!" I shouted emphasizing the last word.

That did it. I heard the doors open in bangs and rushed footsteps.

"Amelia? What is going on?

-It's Nori, he's lying on the floor and bleeding." That spurred them into action.

Before the two of them could crowd me though, I ordered.

"I need light in this room. I have to see where he's hurt."

The two brothers scrambled to light candles and revive the dead fire. In a few minutes the room was as lit as could be and I tried my hardest to keep my face neutral.

There was a reason why surgeons should not operate relatives. Seeing Nori's pale face spattered with crimson blood tore my heart. My fingers froze and my gaze stared at the sight of him, unconscious, bleeding, dying. My mind went blank. Thankfully Ori let out a pained gasp that woke me from my shock induced torpor.

I shook my head and took a long deep breath. Right now I needed to be the healer, not the terrified friend. It took me a few seconds to manage to block thoughts of Nori and concentrate on the factual elements I could see.

The purple tunic and the leather coat were torn and darkened by blood. I slowly and prudently opened the coat and tunic to reveal Nori's undershirt which was rendered crimson by blood. Before doing anything else I turned to Dori and Ori, finding them right behind me and white faced.

"Ori, do you know where my instruments are in the wards?' He nodded, obviously remembering the few times he had come to visit me there and so I kept on 'I need them, run as fast as you can and bring me the entire satchel that contain them."

I had barely finished talking that he was already running in the corridor. I turned to Dori next.

"We'll need to put him somewhere else, but for now I need huge amounts of clean linens to absorb the blood and bandage his chest. I'll need water to clean the wound too, it'd be better to boil it first. You have thyme in the kitchen, right?' He nodded 'Once the water boils, put some in it."

I turned back to Nori, not waiting to see Dori leave to do as I had asked.

I let my eyes linger on his face for a second, he was so pale. I brushed my knuckles on his cheek, internally wincing at how cold he felt under my touch. Bracing myself, I shook my head and pushed all thoughts of him out of my mind.

I reached to his undershirt and slowly tried to open it. When I realized that unlacing the upper part wouldn't be enough I looked around and finally spotted one of Nori's dagger. It was on his side, hidden by his leather coat but as soon as I saw it, I grabbed it. I didn't even take the time to think about why there would be blood on the blade. Cutting the undershirt open wasn't complicated but I needed to be cautious; the wet cloth might stick to his wound and removing it forcefully or quickly might worsen the injury.

I was surprised to realize Nori had apparently attempted to heal himself. Under his shirt, his chest was messily bandaged in what I guessed to be an attempt to slow the bleeding. I bit my lower lip and proceeded to cut the dirty and bloody linens. They did stick to his wound and I swore under my breath. It took me an age to remove them completely.

Once his chest was bare in front of my eyes I gasped. I had never seen such a wound before. The flesh was torn open in no less than three distinct places and blood was steadily flowing. I moved closer to inspect the wound, looking for anything that I'd have to remove. Luckily the injury appeared relatively clean, though I was still worried about the eventual infection that would result from it.

At that moment Ori came back in, panting and struggling to catch his breath. He handed me my satchel and I took it without a thought.

"Go help Dori." I ordered before adding "Be quick about it, I need the linens now."

It didn't take me long to clean the blood away once I had the water, thyme and linens. Then I washed my hands thoroughly before preparing my tools and swiftly starting to sew the wounds shut with the clean strings I had prepared and put in my satchel.

"I'll be needing honey too. I don't want to take any chances."

I said to no one in particular, not paying attention to the brothers, knowing one of them was bound to go grab the pot of honey we stored in the kitchen's cupboard.

After a short while, Nori was patched up and I swiped the remaining blood from his chest, leaving it deathly pale, only marred by the three angry red scars and nasty bruises. I mechanically and thoroughly washed my hands and forearms, using clean linens to dry them.

I then started to probe delicately around his chest, checking to see if his ribs were broken, praying for him not to have any internal damages. I didn't find any broken bones and inhaled deeply, hoping for the best. I quickly checked him for other wounds and aside a small cut on his left hand and a rather long gash on his right biceps, there was nothing I could see.

I took the time to close my eyes and breathe before asking the other two.

"I need help to remove completely his tunic and shirt. Meanwhile, if there's still thyme in the kitchen, bring it."

Dori came forth and together we gently stripped Nori, using slow moves to avoid putting pressure on his wounds and tearing them back open. He was still lying on the dirty floor though, but I needed to stitch his arm before I could clean his back and sides from the blood. Then only we would think of carrying him elsewhere.

Dori went to pour some more water in another clean bowl and brought it to me. He had been foreseeing enough to let some water boil atop the wood stove in the kitchen. I cautiously and thoroughly, with Dori's help, cleaned Nori's upper body before we carried him with Ori's help a few steps further.

Dori was holding him upright effortlessly while I applied honey mixed with thyme on the wound and bandaged his whole chest. It was breaking my heart to see his head dangle on his side, lifelessly. I struggled for a minute to focus once more on my duty. In order not to leave any possibility out, I applied the same treatment on his arm and on his hand.

Dori and Ori then carried him to his bed and I followed. Once he lay in the dimly lit room I turned to the brothers.

"Someone should probably tell the King, and I'll need to gather some ointments and treatments from the ward. I don't think it wise to move him further than here.

-Is he going to be alright?"

It hurt to hear Dori speak in such a small, uncertain and worried voice. It hurt even more not to be able to honestly reassure him completely.

"Right now I can only keep a close watch on him. I'll need to monitor whether he breaks into a fever, whether he's cold and many other things. I can't tell you he's perfectly fine.' Seeing both of them looking so despaired I added quickly 'But, I think we treated his wound quickly enough and they were quite clean. I don't think they'll be infected."

That didn't cheer them as much as I thought it would. I sighed and insisted.

"He's a dwarf. You guys are strong and resilient. If tomorrow he's stable, then I think he'll be fine. I just have to keep a close watch for twenty four hours at least."

They both nodded, eyes on Nori, before Dori spoke.

"I'll go and tell Thorin, do you want me to wake Oin too?

-I don't think he could do more right now, so let him sleep.' I shook my head.

-Do you want me to go look for the ointments you need?" Ori's voice was so small and shaky it hurt me physically to hear it.

I hesitated for a minute. I could probably describe Ori what the jars I needed looked and smelt like, but I really didn't want to take any risk. On the other hand I was reluctant to leave Nori's side even for a minute. I bit my lip and finally nodded.

"Could you also bring me a clean dress from my room? I put them in the trunk."

Ori nodded and Dori didn't even stir at the impropriety it was for me to change in a man's room without being married to said man. Ori was back in the room with a clean dress before I had the time to even do something and I quickly explained in details what ointments I'd need.

They both left me alone in Nori's room and I gingerly sat on the bed next to his pale form once I was wearing clean, unsoiled clothes. I softly brushed his forehead, my fingers skimming over his skin, glad not to feel any fever, but frowning when I realized he did feel unnaturally cold.

I left his side only to go grab some more blankets and took extra care when I gently tucked him in.

Once I was alone in the silent room with nothing else to do but look at Nori, the shock and gravity of the situation finally settled in my mind and I felt tears gather in my eyes.

I hated seeing Nori so weak. Nori was supposed to be the strong presence in my world, the one who'd gather me in his arms and reassure me. I needed reassurance now, I needed him, and seeing him there, unmoving and deathly pale nearly had me in a crying heap on the floor. Oh, how I hated to see him like this. Yet I hated even more thinking about all the complications that could happen in the following hours. I couldn't bear thinking about how it would feel if something terrible were to happen.

I couldn't even remember what the last words I had spoken to him were.

God, were my last words to him the ones we exchanged on that awful morning ages ago?

I then realized that I hadn't spoke with Nori in more than two months, almost three.

What had I been thinking? How could I let that happen? What if I never had the chance to…

I struggled to swallow back my tears and whimper and concentrated once more on Nori. I checked his pulse, feeling it quite faint below my fingertips. Way too faint for my taste. Gingerly I let my fingers slide from his neck on top of his still beautiful beard, then on his cheek, then his braided eyebrows. I startled out of my weird daze when I heard a door bang.

Soon enough Dori came back, the King following close by, and they both entered the room silently. I quickly answered the King's question and repeated that I couldn't know whether Nori would be fine until more time had passed.

I spent the whole following day at Nori's side. Kicking out the visitors, except for Dori, Ori, Oin and Dís, the last two checked him to ensure I hadn't missed anything. I didn't mind, to tell the truth it reassured me somehow to have them agree with what I had done so far.

The sight of his broken body lying on his bed was so disturbing. He didn't look anything like Nori. Gone were the playful smirks and winks, gone was the cheeky glint in his eyes. He was so pale it scared me and the dishevelled state of his hair and, to a certain extent his beard, was oddly perturbing too. It was actually weird to see him without his crazy hairdo and I was surprised by the actual length of his hair.

I spent my day changing the bandages and cleaning the wounds, checking his pulse and temperature, looking after him and worrying. In the mean time, my brain was betraying me, sending me images of what could happen, of how the situation could worsen and how he could simply be taken away from us, from me.

I tried to muzzle my pessimist brain, tried to stay calm and simply drowned all my fears deep down in the recess of my heart. My efforts were for nothing and my worries grew tenfold when Nori broke into a fever. Sweat pearled on his forehead and a slight sheen of sweat covered his chest. Removing his bandage I gasped as I saw the swelled wounds that had obviously become infected.

I panicked.

This time I didn't care whether it was midday or midnight, I asked Ori to go call for Oin or Dís.

"What can we do…" I whispered to myself, going through all the plants I knew in my mind.

My knowledge seemed blurred in my mind and I didn't seem able to concentrate at all. I couldn't express at that moment how glad and relieved I was to see Dís stride in quickly.

"Dís, he's having a fever. What plant can I use?

-Stop fussing and think! You're a healer. You know the answer."

Her blunt and sharp answer felt as if cold water had been thrown in my face. Her eyes were hard as she gazed at me. I took a deep breath. Of course I knew what to do. I looked sternly into Dís sterner face and said in a monotone.

"Snapdragon. If I prepare a poultice with snapdragon flowers, thyme and witch hazel, it should significantly reduce the swelling and prevent the infection to spread.

-Right. And then?

-To treat his fever, I think we should try and force him to drink some infusion of Echinacea and Chrysanthemum."

Dís nodded and suddenly threw me a large satchel that I barely managed to catch before it fell. She then turned away and started to walk back out.

"Next time you simply need a delivery boy, ask Ori will you?"She called to me from the corridor.

I smiled for I knew she wasn't offended, merely annoyed by my fussing around. Gee I was spending too much time around Dori. I immediately started to prepare the infusion and the poultice. As I suspected, the bag Dís had thrown me contained all the plants I'd need.

Applying the poultice was easy enough but I found myself slightly tense when I had to make him drink the tea prepared earlier. I thought about it before gingerly lifting his head and upper body and sliding between him and the wall. I used my own body to make him lean back in a half seated position between my legs.

I felt a bit embarrassed at this weird position but chastised myself mentally, I had to help him in any way I could, regardless of any unease I might have and I wasn't strong enough to lift him with one arm and hold the cup in my other hand without spilling half its content on him.

Gently I brushed away from his feverish face a few strands of hair that had escaped his dishevelled hairdo. I placed the back of his head on my shoulder, maintaining him relatively straight, straight enough for him not to choke when I'll put liquids in his throat. First of all though, I had to try and awake him.

After many words whispered in his ears and with my cool hands on his forehead, I finally felt him stir slightly. His eyes remained closed though and he didn't really wake, for he was still clearly in a feverish daze. Not wishing to wait for him to be entirely conscious I cautiously put the cup against his too pale lips and forced a bit of the infusion in his mouth.

It tore my heart to hear and feel him cough at first. I could feel through his back and in my chest the rumble of each cough and I knew that every cough was putting an added tension on his wounds. He was trembling, obviously in pain, against me and I hated it, for it meant he was suffering and I couldn't bear this thought.

Still I forced him to drink more of the infusion. Slowly.

That night I barely slept and I was grateful to have Dori and Ori with me to sit at Nori's bedside. The two brothers stayed with me often, though they still had to keep on working during the day. I was spending all my time in Nori's room and his two brothers came whenever they could.

I had felt terrible when Ori had confessed he just couldn't stand seeing his brother in such a state. It was early on the second day and Ori and I ended up in a tight hug. It was a hard and terrible time for the three of us. Even the ever strong Dori seemed utterly defeated and I could see in his slumped shoulders that he somehow felt responsible for Nori's situation though I couldn't fathom why.

The second day, late in the evening and after many repeats of the same actions, his fever finally broke. I remember how relief rushed through me, making my legs slightly shaky. If the fever was down, then it meant Nori was getting better.

* * *

In the early afternoon of the fourth day, I was starting to doze when Nori let out a moan and started to stir. It woke me up immediately and I jumped to my feet, rushing to his side and kneeling beside the bed. This time, it appeared he was about to regain consciousness for good.

"Nori!" I let out in a whisper.

I felt immensely glad to see his eyes open. It took him a few blinks and a long minute to focus his eyes on me. He was clearly disorientated and I softly spoke to reassure him. My hands were on his shoulder, making sure he wouldn't try and sit up; men I had found, and especially dwarves, could be extremely stubborn and stupid when it came to their own injuries.

"Don't move. You're in your room. I found you in the living room and I patched you up. You have to lay still."

He nodded weakly and opened his mouth to speak yet he didn't manage to utter a word.

"Hang on" I told him before quickly grabbing some fresh water Ori had brought me earlier.

"Here" I cautiously helped him drink, lifting his head slightly.

I couldn't help but wince when he choked a bit and coughed, obviously in pain. Still he needed to hydrate himself and now he was awake I would have to be careful about his intake of food too. It took us some time, but he finally managed to drink some much needed water. I wanted nothing more than to let him sleep and recover. Right now though, I needed to ask him several things.

"Nori, listen, I need you to answer some questions. Does it hurt anywhere besides your torso?

-No' He croaked, but then added 'My head.

-Headache then."

I slowly probed his chest, looking at his reactions. At the end I was glad to find out he was apparently unhurt except for the three scars he now sported on his muscled chest and arm as well as a few bruised ribs. His other bruises were already starting to fade a bit thanks to Oin's almost magical ointment.

"I'll go and prepare some more infusion for you to drink. I'll tell Dori and Ori you're awake. Don't move! I'm serious!"

He nodded, clearly too weak to do anything else and I could see he was already making an effort to just move his head.

It was great bringing news of Nori's awakening to his brothers. Their gloomy and sorrowful looks disappeared quickly and they rushed to his side, hopefully listening to my orders not to move or crowd the patient.

I took some time to prepare Nori's infusion; I wanted to leave the three brothers alone for awhile, I believed they needed it. I put some hot water in a bowl where I had previously mixed Echinacea and chamomile and slowly waited for the plants to infuse. Meanwhile I prepared some more water in a large cauldron and put it to boil. Once the infusion was ready I poured the tinted water in another cup and lathered it with honey before bringing it to Nori.

I stopped at the door when I saw the three brothers together. I didn't think I'd ever see Nori being in the position of the weakened and pampered one; usually Ori, or myself, was cuddled and taken care of by the other two. Here Nori was lying on the bed, still deathly pale while Ori was kneeling next to him, holding his right hand in his and Dori had one of his hands gently brushing Nori's forehead.

At that moment I sorely missed my old camera. I took in the sight and put it in some corner of my mind, wishing never to forget it, and then I cleared my throat softly.

They all glanced at me and I gave them my sweetest genuine smile.

"Hey there, I've got something for you to drink."

It took him some time, but with Dori's help we managed to have Nori in a half seated position thanks to a huge amount of cushions and pillows. After awhile, once he had drunk all the infusion, I shooed the two brothers out.

"Why can't we stay?' Ori whined.

-Because I say so, I'm his healer right now, not your ward. He needs sleep, lots of it. Out, both of you." I sternly said, though I smiled at Ori.

When I came back to Nori's side, I cautiously started to remove his bandage when I heard him whisper.

"Tyrant"

I glanced at his face, seeing the faded, yet still present, amused glint in his eyes. I smiled broadly at him and shrugged. I told him what I was doing and what I had observed of his wounds the days before.

After having checked his injury and being relatively happy with its state of healing, I went back to the kitchen and gathered the boiled water. Dori had already put it in one copper bowl, letting it cool down.

Coming back in the room, I could see that Nori hadn't moved an inch, proving how tired and weak he really was. I had no doubt that if he could, he would have already been moving around. I put the bowl of water on his bedside table and took a clean cloth. I could feel Nori's eyes on me when I put the cloth in the water and then wringed it above the bowl.

Then, without looking at his face, I gingerly started to clean his wound. It felt strangely different to do that now that he was awake but I guessed it was just the fact that he was observing me. It took me some time to clean away the rests of poultice and sweat from his chest and arms and during that whole time I didn't glance at him. When I did though, I couldn't help but smile.

It amused me greatly to see his pale cheeks had taken a rosy tinge and I couldn't resist playfully teasing him. I was glad to see some colours on him and didn't hesitate to tell him so.

Nori glanced at me and pouted, before pointedly looking away, making me softly chuckle.

* * *

Even though his wounds were healing well, Nori remained weak and bedridden. And I remained at his side during the whole time, taking care of him and spoon feeding him his broth the first few days wasn't easy. Really, it wasn't.

"Why can't I have real food.' Nori groaned while Dori helped him into the same half seated position than earlier.

-Because, ' I answered with a smile. 'You haven't eaten in days and you're weak. Your stomach wouldn't hold anything else.

-I'm not…' I winced slightly when he struggled to get the words out, clearly in pain. '…weak.

-Amelia, I'll leave you to it.' Dori told me then.' Good luck."

I smiled at him when he left. I already knew that dwarves made terrible patient, so I couldn't hold it against Dori not to want to take care of one, even if it was his brother. I didn't mind so I sat on the bed, next to Nori and facing him, a bowl of broth on my knees.

"You are not weak. I know. But right now you're injured. Please Nori, let me help you get better." I softly told him.

I saw him hesitate, I could read his face easily right now; he was too tired to school his feature as he usually did. After some minutes he finally relented and slowly I fed him his broth. It was the only time he complained about me feeding him and I was honestly surprised. I expected him to fight me about everything.

Other than that I spent my entire days with him and his brothers came regularly too. We talked with him when he was awake, and I usually rested when he did. After a few days, I decided to massage his limbs in order to help blood circulate and to make sure the muscles were used even during his convalescence.

"What…what are you doing?' He sputtered at first.

-Massages.' I simply answered.

-Why do you do that?' He complained his cheeks once more adorning a rosy colour.

-Because I know it's good for your health.

-I'm not a child.

-It'd be greatly frightening, unsettling and even sickening to see a child with such wounds.' I replied while carefully massaging his legs. 'Stop complaining and let me do my job.

-You…you!

-I…what?" I absentmindedly asked while stopping my work.

I then simply moved on to cautiously wetting the honey bandages I had put back in place earlier and removing them. Then I started to gingerly probe at the sides of his injury.

I glanced at him as he hadn't answered and I had barely the time to swallow back a chuckle that would have angered him. Nori was currently pouting, looking away from me, staring at the wall and obviously annoyed.

I took some clean linen and softly brushed away the remnants of honey on his wounds. I saw him shiver but he didn't utter a sound. After having cleaned his wound, I decided to wait a bit before applying more honey. Using another clean cloth, I slowly washed Nori's upper body.

I couldn't help but smirk when I saw that he had closed his eyes and clenched both his fists and jaw. He was completely tense.

Was he really that angry at being unable to wash himself? Was it so shameful? Silly men…

* * *

At first Nori was quite evidently ashamed each time I had to help him but after a few days of such treatments he became slightly less embarrassed though he quickly turned grumpy. All in all his grouchy face amused me greatly and when I told him so, he made extra efforts to appear cheerful.

Stubborn dwarf.

He went out of his way to try and annoy me. The silly man didn't realize that his being in better health was good news enough for me to forget about his quirks…for now at least.

It took him two weeks to recover enough to be able to go out of his room and walk around. He had lost a lot of blood and I hadn't wanted to take any risks, forcing him to stay in bed for a whole week and only allowing short walking time during the second.

And it took me Nori saying I was worse than Dori to realize I might have been overreacting.

I didn't pay attention to it at the time, and I'm not sure Nori did, but all the pent up anger and hurt I had felt during months had simply vanished from my mind the night I had found him bathing in his own blood. Apparently that I took care of him had pushed away the remnants of his own anger.

It sounded so cliché to say his injuries had made me forget about our quarrel, yet it was the truth. I hadn't suddenly realized I cared for him or anything of the sort; I had known that for weeks, months even.

No. His injuries had simply been a cruel reminder that life around was dangerous and that it was stupid to waste time quarrelling over petty things.

Just like that, without a word, we put aside our dispute and forgot about it.

Another important thing that happened during Nori's recovery was that I finally found out what it was exactly he did for a job.

I was simply there when Dori, the King and Gloin came to talk with Nori about it. When I learned about his so called job, I really wasn't impressed, that's for sure.

* * *

The three dwarves had come in while I was finishing putting back Nori's bandages, three days after he awoke. Quite unsurprisingly, the King spoke first after greetings were quickly exchanged.

"What have you done this time?" He simply asked.

I remember looking at them questioningly but no one bothered noticing my presence. It took some time and finally a direct order from the King for Nori to speak.

"I didn't do anything. I was simply coming back and got ambushed.

-Ambushed? Who ambushed you? Why?

-Well…men. Not too far from the mountains' path, two days after I left Lunetown.

-An ambush you say. Why did they plan to attack you?" The King insisted.

I saw Nori avoid everyone's eyes and I could easily recognize the stubborn look on his face. Looking back at the other dwarves I noticed they were growing quite angry. An argument would not be good for Nori's recovery so I decided to intervene. I cleared my throat, making them all glance at me, and put my hand on Nori's before saying.

"Nori, if I was the one lying here, refusing to speak, you'd be throwing the room's furniture at me already.' I gently chastised 'I have the feeling those three already have a hunch as to what happened, why not tell them?"

He looked at me and seemed to hesitate. I was simply speaking the truth. Nori would be quite angered if I remained silent and refused to tell him who might have hurt me.

He sighed deeply before lowering his gaze to his lap.

"I had stolen a few…barely precious items from them a moon or so ago."

I blinked while the three other dwarves groaned and growled.

"You're a thief?' I asked genuinely surprised 'But you said you were in trades…oh! Oooh. Cheeky dwarf." I couldn't help but smirk, even though it really wasn't the sort of reaction that was expected in such a situation.

To tell the truth I simply didn't care at all as to what Nori did, as long as he came back relatively unharmed and didn't cause troubles for me or our friends. Well, sure, I clearly didn't agree with his choice of career and I strongly believed thieves should be put in jail. But at the moment my mind was simply clouded by my relief of seeing him in better health. Seeing him able to talk and be grumpy was much more important to me than his activities.

A thief was a thief and I didn't think there was a good excuse for being one. But how could I be angry, disdainful or annoyed at Nori for that? After all…it was Nori. The Nori who was smirking and winking at me, trying to make me cheerier, he was my friend, one of the closest I had here. He was the one to hold me when I had nightmare and the one to sooth me when I was sad or terrified. How could I hold it against him?

How could I even picture him as a thief?

In my mind I just couldn't put together the thought of Nori and the image I had of thieves. It just didn't coincide. I knew objectively that he was one, hell he said it himself, but something in my mind was whispering it couldn't be that simple. I didn't know if that little voice was just me wishing that this man I cared deeply for wasn't a criminal, or if it was a genuine and realistic intuition.

Now though I realized I could have guessed this information on my own awhile ago. It wasn't as if he was going out of his way to hide it. Memories of events started to click into places in my mind and I turned to Nori, completely forgetting about the others being here.

"Nori…remember that comb? The wooden one in that first town we went to?

-What about it?' He purposely avoided my gaze.

-Well?" I knew he had perfectly understood what I wanted to ask him.

He didn't answer, simply shrugged. I guessed he would never tell me, keeping me wondering. That sounded cheeky enough for him. There was no way I'll force the answer out of him and it made me wonder whether I really cared at all about it or not. I'll have to ponder on that later.

Right now though the other three dwarves wanted answers and they clearly were in no mind to wait.

"Did you kill the men?' Gloin asked and I jolted slightly, I hadn't even thought to ask such a thing.

-No, not all of them.

-What caused your wound?' I asked softly, squeezing his hand unconsciously.

-Spiked mace.' Nori whispered.

-How did you get away?' The King questioned him, ignoring me.

-Killed one, injured the two others."

More groans and sighs resonated in the room. I wasn't sure how to react anymore so I remained silent and unmoving. I knew already that these men viewed killing in an entirely different way that I did and I knew Nori had no qualms in killing someone who had wronged him. I guessed ambushing him was close enough to wronging him. Still their reaction was quite new to me and I had truly no idea of what to think about this whole mess. From what I could gather, they were more upset about the fact that Nori hadn't killed them all. Such a feeling was quite foreign to me. Though, if I had to choose, I'd prefer to see all his enemies dead and Nori safe and sound instead of the contrary.

Still, was it really so important right now to know whether Nori had butchered a group of men or not?

During this whole time, I hadn't realized that my hand was still on Nori's. I didn't know if anyone had noticed it, for no one commented on that fact and Nori didn't move away either. None of us paid any attention to those details.

"Nori, I swear one day you're going to get killed.' Dori said, shaking his head forlornly.

-I'm more concerned at seeing men arrives with weapons drawn to kick us out of this place.' The King snapped, explaining somehow why he was interested in the men's health.

-Lad, you have got to stop. It's really a shameful hobby you've found for yourself.' Gloin added in a sigh.

-It certainly has to stop Nori. You can't get yourself killed, or risk everyone's safety just for…for nothing. Why do you do that? For a few useless items, trinkets you then struggle to sell in some miserable alleys in men's towns?' The King's voice was as stern as ever when he spat those words.

-Nori, why don't you go back in the forges? You were so talented. Mother always said she loved the beads you created, they sold very well too. She said you had the most precise and meticulous hands she'd ever seen." Dori insisted.

I remained a silent witness, listening to the three dwarves who attempted to reason with Nori. Nori on his part hadn't said a word and seemed to have no reaction whatsoever. I chose to observe him a bit more closely because I didn't believe he wouldn't feel anything about all those talks. The three dwarves kept on ranting, not really paying attention to Nori's lack of reaction.

I for my part could now clearly see his shoulders tensing and anger brewing in the depths of Nori's eyes. Anger was not good for him. Anger would tire him and possibly undo all the progress he'd made in his recovery. I took the decision to put a stop to this interrogation, not caring about who was speaking at the moment.

"Alright everyone, time's up. Please gentlemen, leave my patient alone. You can come back some other day."

Wow, I hadn't expected such glares to be sent my way. They had all turned silent in a second too. Man, I didn't know I could have such an effect on three grown men.

"We'll stay here as long as this matter isn't solved.' The King growled at me.

-No you won't." I insisted calmly.

I faced the King's angry glare with my own steady gaze. I wouldn't budge. I was the healer here. I knew better than them what should be done and had only my patient's interest to care for.

"You dare order me around?

-I'm not ordering you around. I'm telling you to leave now. With all due respect sir, you might be my King, but I'm the healer here. And it is as a healer taking care of her patient that I respectfully tell you to go. Unless of course you wish to interrogate him further and leave him so weak that his recovery would take twice as long."

I quirked an eyebrow at him, patiently waiting for him to realize I was right and not simply challenging his authority for fun.

He took a deep breath and stared at me his frown deeper than usual, appraising me, before giving a quick nod and turning away, just like that. Gloin followed directly after him. Dori though took some more time. He looked at his younger brother, looking clearly sad and reproving. He sighed deeply and shook his head, muttering ' Ma would be so disappointed.'

I felt Nori tense next to me, but he didn't say anything and didn't even watch his brother leaving the room. I was soon alone with Nori again. Turning towards him, I saw him staring at me and I shrugged.

"Lie down please. I was serious about your recovery. You need to relax.

-I'm not that weak.' His anger was apparently using me as an outlet.

-I know that.' I replied patiently while putting some drops of lavender oil on my finger tips. 'Lie down now or I'll make you."

He gave me a doubtful look but obeyed nonetheless, deeply sighing when his head fell on the pillow. I approached him and gingerly put my fingers against his temples. His eyes snapped open and he stared at me, a strange look in his eyes.

"I'm going to smell like a woman.' He complained weakly.

-Yep. That'd be a nice change from the blood and gore." I smirked.

He rolled his eyes and hissed when he tried to shift. Seeing Nori like this was really not something I enjoyed at all.

I simply started to massage his temples silently and smiled slightly when his eyes fluttered closed and he started to finally relax. After awhile though I couldn't resist and spoke.

"So you're a thief then."

His right eye half opened and he hummed.

"Dare I ask why you decided to do something apparently not many dwarves do?

-How do you know no other dwarves are thief?' he simply countered.

-Gloin's words, and the others' reaction.' I automatically replied 'So, why giving up something you were quite good at for another job which is obviously life-threatening and not really honourable?"

He sighed and closed his eyes back again. I didn't insist. Slowly I removed my hands from his temples and readied myself to leave him alone, he needed to relax quietly. I squeezed his hand lightly before softly whispering.

"Try and relax now. I mean it. You need some sleep."

He remained silent though I felt him shiver ever so slightly and I frowned. I automatically grabbed another blanket that I put on his legs. All the while he remained unmoving, eyes closed and I thought he was fast asleep. I watched him for several seconds before turning back and heading for the door. I was almost there when he spoke, startling me.

"I'm looking for some…things. Stealing other stuffs is just a way to … cover my expenses."

I turned back and leaned on the door for a minute before walking back to him. I tilted my head slightly and asked in a soft voice.

"What are you looking for?"

He didn't answer and didn't stop me this time when I left. Still, I had the feeling he had just told me something quite important.

I left him alone, knowing I would not ask him this question again. At least not for some time.

* * *

**A/N: Thanks to those of you who reviewed last chapter! I was really happy to read how you had felt about it ^^ Thanks to the four guests, I'm sorry I can't answer to you personally, but it really was great to read each of your reviews! Thank you all for the support!**

**So….I hope you liked this chapter. I don't know how many time I edited it. Now, at least Amelia knows about Nori being a thief :)**** … if nothing else.**

**I really hope you enjoyed it, and that it wasn't too predictable or boring. I know it was probably a bit cheesy, but I couldn't help it… sorry 'bout that. **

**I've had some problem with the doc manager too, so I hope the formatting of this chapter didn't come out too weird… if it did, first I'm sorry, and I'll try to remove and upload it again.**

**I'll try and update the next chapter before the end of the weekend. **

**Thanks again so much for your support! I can't tell you how much it's motivating me to read each of your reviews :)****  
**


	14. A peaceful day in Thorin's Halls

**Everything belongs to JRR Tolkien except for my OC and the plot.**

* * *

Like I had thought, Nori and I didn't speak about this little exchange we had. As soon as he was feeling well enough to stand and walk, he just continued his life as if nothing had happened at all and his brother behaved similarly. After several weeks, life was back to normal. Well as normal as life could be in Thorin's Halls.

At the moment I was struggling in the healing wards, trying to bandage a dwarf, who was yelling and shouting at another black haired one. The second dwarf, who was currently being treated by Oin, was yelling back just as loudly. I couldn't understand what they were saying but my ears were starting to ring from the sheer volume two dwarves could achieve when they put their heart and will in trying to obtain an unordinary level of sounds.

It was seriously starting to grate on my own nerves, while I started to envy Oin for being deaf, though now that I thought about it, maybe that's how he became deaf in the first place. I wasn't paying much attention to the two dwarves, attempting to concentrate on applying a bandage correctly to someone who clearly didn't care whether he was being bandaged or not wasn't easy.

I wondered how Dís would react in such instance. The woman was hard headed and probably more stubborn than those two dwarves put together. It probably was something running in the blood of that family, though I didn't know much of the two young brothers. Would Dís behave like Oin or would she say something? If she said anything, what would it be? How would she say it?

Remembering how she had kicked away partying dwarves after the mine's collapsing, I couldn't believe she would let herself be bullied by two angry dwarves.

"Please, could you stop moving for a minute?" I tried to no avail.

Well, I wasn't even sure these men had heard me. It wasn't as if I would yell at injured patients anyway. I sighed and focused on my work, attempting to finish it quickly and be done with it.

I was sitting on the bed next to the dwarf. My balance was precarious as the dwarf was almost bouncing on the bed in his fury. My jars of ointment were set up just next to me and I had a bowl with water in between my two knees, it wasn't so easy to keep it stable while that bloody dwarf gesticulated in every directions. I just wanted to finish healing him and go to the market, maybe go greet Bifur before going to buy some food for this night's dinner.

I was almost done with the bandage when the dwarf made a wide move with his arms, knocking me of balance. I yelped and fell on the floor, one of my hands still holding on one side of the linen I was using to bandage the stupid dwarf. The jars with ointments rolled on the floor, thankfully not breaking, while the bowl with bloodied water fell on me.

I was now on the floor, astounded, and wet with dirty water dripping from the front of my dress. Looking up I saw the dwarf's bandage was completely undone and I had to restart from scratch.

The bloody dunderhead was still yelling at the other.

Looking around I saw Oin looking at me with wide eyes while the other two kept on yelling.

Something snapped in my head.

I was usually a peaceful and calm person, I strongly believed in diplomacy and I really didn't think that violence should ever be used to solve a problem. What was the point in yelling anyway when there surely was a peaceful solution to any situation?

I admit it now.

I was wrong.

I jumped back on my feet, fist clenched on my hips and I took a deep breath, inhaling as much air as I could. Oin flinched, obviously understanding what I was about to do.

"Oy! Would you just shut up you bloody idiots!"

My voice rang above the chaos of the two dwarves and surprised them enough to make them stop yelling at each other. I saw them blink before they both looked at me in surprise.

"Look what you did! Have you no respect whatsoever for the place you're in? You're in a healing ward, not a tavern. We don't do brawls and yelling matches here. So now you'll shut it, stop moving and you'll let yourself be treated. Once you're out of here I don't care what you do to each other but here and now I don't even want to hear you breathe! Understood?"

I was looking at each of them in turn, waiting for any sign they had understood me. Finally they both nodded and remained silent.

I harrumphed and went back to bandage the dwarf's chest. He didn't move anymore and I was done in mere minutes.

"Here. Now go out and back to your place. I want you to stay in bed for two days.

"Two days? For this scratch? Surely milady…

"No. Two days for your head to cool down and for you to think about how you should behave in a healing ward. No out!"

I heard the second dwarf chuckle but he didn't do it any longer when he saw the glare I sent his way. Oin was smiling contentedly and ordered the second dwarf to stay in bed for two days too.

Once it was just the both of us, he turned to me while I was cleaning the mess made by the other two.

"Amelia I should say it's nice to find out that you have a voice too."

I looked at him, astounded, and he simply went to tidy up the cabinets of jars.

"What are you saying Master Oin, of course I have a voice.

"Oh, I knew that dear. It's just kind of you to let us hear it from time to time."

I truly didn't know how to take that so I chose not to speak about it anymore. I was still thinking about his words though; did he mean to say I should speak up more often? Sure it appeared that dwarves had no issue in letting their feelings be known loudly, but I wasn't sure I could do it too.

It wasn't that I was astonishingly shy. I just wasn't used to yell at people and I didn't think it was such a bad thing either. It had already been difficult for me to simply speak my mind in front of the King, and it wasn't really me who spoke back then, it was the healer on duty. I idly wondered whether I was developing some personality disorder; I was starting to speak up more when I was performing my duties, but it still proved difficult to voice my thoughts and opinions to others when it wasn't related to work.

Still, it was true that people around tended to find it natural to yell at each other. Even now I could remember Danà's words about that time I had thrown a glass of water at Bofur's face.

She had been right. Bofur had only seemed to tease me more after that. I had thought for some time that the dwarf had some mental issues but he was just being a dwarf. They were merry and cheeky, loved to laugh and tease the others and enjoyed more than anything else to be loud and messy.

Oin's voice broke through my thoughts and I looked up to see him already cleaning the mess done by the two dwarves.

"You can directly go home Amelia. I don't think we'll have more trouble today."

I simply nodded, eyeing my dress with obvious disgust. I wanted nothing more than to go and take a hot bath right now. I'll have to stop by the apartment though to take some clean clothes to wear. I'll have to clean my bra too seeing as how the top of my chest was dripping wet. I groaned. I hated the cold feeling that was sipping slowly from my chest to my stomach. The cloth was sticking to my skin too; I shuddered in disgust and quickly left the wards, hurrying back to my room.

Thankfully it didn't take me long to jog in the corridors and none of the three brothers were there. I quickly went into my room and grabbed a clean dress, a towel, soap…

My hands froze as it hovered over the wooden comb Nori had given me. Had he stolen this comb? Did it matter? I couldn't say I agreed with his choices but the comb had been a nice present. I didn't want to give it back or hide it somewhere just because Nori might have stolen it. I bit my lower lip, clearly unsure of what to do. I couldn't decide what to really think about Nori's activities. I was torn.

After awhile I guiltily took the comb and added it on the pile of items I'll take with me to the baths.

I felt a bit guilty, using something that might have been stolen. But on the other hand I couldn't find it in myself to see Nori in another light. I cared too much about him, I had been too upset when we quarrelled and I simply couldn't think about losing him over something like this. Nori was a thief. Well I'll have to adjust to that. Anyway it seemed that even his brother's opinion didn't matter, so I couldn't believe my opinion would.

I finished to grab my things and quickly strode in the direction of the public baths. I hoped water had been heated recently; usually they heated it twice a day in the women's baths. If I was lucky, it'd been heated in the past hour or so and the water would be perfectly warm.

When I came in though I quickly understood that I hadn't been lucky at all. The air in the room was too cold for the heater to have worked recently enough. Grumbling, I resigned myself to take a cold bath.

This day just couldn't get any better.

I quickly stripped and eyed my bra sceptically, it had seen better days. It was getting overused; it had already been an old one when I arrived here and wearing it almost every day since hadn't helped.

I couldn't see myself not using one though. I knew that Dís and Danà didn't use such things; I believed they used bindings of sorts but I couldn't get it in my head to roll myself in bandages. Maybe I could go and ask the seamstresses if they could somehow replicate it.

I shivered when I stepped in the cold mountain water and I swore loudly. Nope, couldn't get used to that either.

My bath was quick and to the point. I was particularly meticulous when washing my hair, I always was very cautious when handling my braid. I didn't know what would happen if I lost one of the beads; maybe it'd be offending? I should ask Dori about that. I played with it between my fingers. Every time I saw or felt this braid, it made a warm feeling grow in my heart. I was glad Dori and Balin had accepted me as their ward. Having this braid here always seemed to cheer me up.

Quickly stepping out of the frigid water, I was soon dressing back in a clean purple dress that Danà had described as typical of dwarvish fashion. The neckline was round and stopped just high enough to cover the breasts completely. The waist and bust was tightly fitted and then from my hips to my feet the dress fell in an ample skirt. The sleeves were puffed from the shoulder to the elbows and tight around the forearm. Dwarvish women, Danà had explained, worked hard every day and didn't want their sleeves to hinder their movements.

I was soon ready to go back to the apartment and I quickly put my clean, but wet, bra hidden on top of the pile of clothes, medieval-like underwear, towels and other items I carried.

I was glad not to meet any soul in the corridors, but my luck just had to stop when I crossed the threshold of our house.

I could already hear some known voices coming from the kitchen. Though they were friends, I didn't want them to see my dirty clothes. I took a deep breath and readjusted my hold on the pile I carried before rushing to quickly stride to my room. I almost collided with Bombur though when he was exiting the kitchen.

"Hello Miss Amelia."

"Hi Bombur, just give me a minute will you."

I muttered before almost running to my room. From the corner of my eyes I had seen that Bofur was here too, as were the three brothers. I quickly threw my dirty clothes in a basket at the foot of my bed and put the other items back in their place. I was about to go out of my room when I heard two new voices coming from the kitchen.

I knew them but couldn't quite place them. I shrugged, it didn't matter much who was there, for I would be nice and polite with anyone. I had yet to meet a dwarf I hated or disliked completely. Sure some of them freaked me out, intimidated me to no end or were just plain weird. But all in all they were a nice bunch, with admittedly no manners, but lots of honour and pride that compensated for their bluntness.

When I pushed the door and entered the kitchen though, I froze and all my nice sentiments went out of the proverbial window.

There, in the middle of the room, those bloody dwarves were studying my bra. Yes studying.

My eyes widened.

My other sense just stopped working.

I remembered the two dwarves. They were Dís' sons and heirs to the throne. Even though I remembered their faces and the time they had saved me from the maze of corridors, I wasn't certain about their names. Pili? Lili? It was something Li. Well, whatever their names, right now I didn't care.

The damn idiot, the younger brother, was holding and tugging on my bra in front of the others.

He was standing in a middle of a circle that consisted of him, his blond brother, Bofur, Bombur, who was apparently back and Ori. Dori and Nori were still sitting at the table, Dori drinking tea peacefully and Nori preparing his pipe.

My ears decided that now was a good time to start communicating with my brain again.

"Is it a slingshot?' Something Li said.

"It doesn't look like it'd be efficient, nor does it appear precise.' Ori frowned.

"Maybe it's a kind of hat?' Bofur added.

"Na… it has two sides. And it's too thin.' The blond brother pointed out.

"I wonder what you can put in that. It's way too small to be a kind of bag.' Something Li analyzed and I saw red.

"It's too big to be a pouch and it doesn't close anyway…"

My wits came back to me in a rush. I bolted and pushed the men away, making a beeline for the dark haired dwarf who appeared shocked by my sudden rush.

"Oy, Miss Amelia, how are you?' He asked me.

"Give. Me. That. Now." I enunciated.

I was entirely stunned to see a sly smirk grew on his face. He wouldn't dare.

"Now, now, Miss Amelia, it's not a way to talk to a prince."

"Prince or not I'll whack your stubborn head if you don't hand me that immediately.' I snapped while a blush crept on my cheeks.

I tried to grab the garment but he dodged my hands absentmindedly.

"Na…I don't think so." He smiled widely and cheekily.

"Kili, you should give it back.' The blond dwarf advised his brother.

"I just want to know what it is!' Kili answered in a shrug while he still avoided my hands easily.

"Give it back!" I ordered but it just made him smile more.

The other dwarves started to chuckle when Kili decided to dash away from me, jumping on the table and dangling my bra in front of me, just to remove it quickly from my sight when I attempted to catch it.

I couldn't win against his reflexes, he was way faster than me and I was starting to be so embarrassed that my movements were becoming uncontrolled. My head was probably as red as it could humanly be possible to be.

"Give it back!"

"Come on, you can catch it! Give it a try!" He joked while the other cheered.

I glanced toward Dori and Nori at that moment. Dori was starting to frown and he looked at me questioningly. I quickly glanced at Nori who was observing me attentively. At the precise moment when I was about to talk, Kili shook my bra just in front of me and I once more tried to catch it to no avail.

To my utter shame, a few tears started to well up in my eyes.

I saw that Dori was about to stand when suddenly Kili wasn't on his feet at the top of the table anymore.

He had apparently stumbled on a plate that I was certain hadn't been there a second before. I dashed to try and grab Kili before he ran away but he was still quicker than me and in a second he had bolted to the door. Still smiling he went to shake my bra in front of me again when we all froze. In his hand was a handkerchief.

"Eh?"

Where was my bra? Everyone stopped to laugh and Kili whined.

"Oy, Nori you're no fun!"

My head snapped to the side as I looked at Nori who simply shrugged. I caught his eyes and he gestured for me to come and take my bra back. In the meantime Dori was already chastising the younger dwarf.

"Kili, you should know when to stop your jokes. Amelia clearly didn't appreciate your dubious humour."

"But I didn't mean anything by it master Dori."

"Still" Dori admonished him.

I didn't pay attention to them while Nori handed me the piece of underwear.

"Thanks Nori." I whispered.

He simply smirked at me and sent me a wink which quickly made me smile softly again.

"I just wanted to know what it was! I found it on the floor…'Kili was still whining.

"Lady Amelia' The blond asked 'Can't you tell us what it is?"

"Aye lass, what is it?"

"Yes Amelia, what do you use that for?"

They were all staring at me, waiting patiently for me to tell them. Ori even had taken his notebook out and was ready to write everything I'd say. I was hesitating. Surely my embarrassment would be nothing compared to theirs, and besides it couldn't get worse for me.

"It's my bra' I muttered.

"What's a bra?"

"It's what we use instead of bindings in my world.' I groaned.

"Instead of binding what?" Kili asked.

They were all waiting for me to explain. All those grown men were paying extra attention to my every word. I simply quirked an eyebrow, wondering which one would find out first. Surprisingly, it appeared that Nori was the first one to make the connection. I heard him suddenly choke on the smoke of his pipe and struggle to find his breath again.

I couldn't stop myself, I had to glance at him.

Well, he was probably as red as I had been earlier on. He had let his pipe fall on the table and was looking at me while coughing loudly. The sight and the knowledge he knew what I had meant made me smirk.

I was surprised to see his eyes glint with amusement after I had smirked at him, though something in the depth of those grey irises promised retribution for the little teasing I was doing.

"I don't get it.' Kili frowned.

"Ask your mother, she'll explain." I retorted automatically.

At that Nori coughed some more, though this time I just knew he was trying to dissimulate his laugh. Oh yes I could picture quite well how Dís would answer. That would teach him to play with my belongings.

I wondered where this sneaky streak came from. I had never been cheeky. On the contrary I had always been rather introverted and though I laughed as loudly as everyone, I just couldn't find it in myself to laugh with people or in front of them. Teasing others in a friendly way was nothing but a notion I had heard of but never truly experienced myself.

Since I had arrived here though, I realized that I was slowly beginning to change. It felt oddly liberating to be able to laugh with others. In the end I didn't mind the embarrassment if it meant I would manage to tease others and laugh with them later. I could see they didn't do it in a mean way either, which helped me greatly in accepting the embarrassment.

Yes, I was definitely learning to enjoy life here thanks to those blunt and slightly annoying dwarves, who couldn't help but laugh almost all the time.

I looked around when I heard a short gasp.

Yep, from the red of his cheeks to the way he was biting hard on his lips to avoid laughing aloud, I could most certainly tell that Bofur had found out too. The playful way his eyes twinkled let me know immediately he enjoyed my little prank to Kili.

I was now clutching at my bra tightly, holding it against my chest protectively and thought how ridiculous it probably looked like. After all it was only a bra, an old, overused one at that; but I didn't want to let these men and boys catch it again.

I noticed that Ori was observing me, frowning, still clearly blissfully unaware. I was observing while he stared intensely at my chest and I was glad I did that. Suddenly Ori's face went from its natural pale rosy colour to a bright red. It had been so sudden that I couldn't help but laugh. Ori looked so embarrassed too…

I laughed so much that I bent in two, leaning heavily on the table in order not to fall on the floor. Bofur evidently couldn't hold his laugh anymore and he soon roared with laughter too. From his laugh and also the way he apologized discreetly, I knew the blond dwarf had finally understood too. Meanwhile Dori was still going on and on with Kili about the proper way to behave in front of a lady…and Kili was still complaining that he didn't understand.

Sending me a playful wink, the blond turned to his brother and said.

"Kili, stop complaining, I'm sure mother would be happy to explain. "

"But Fili…"

I laughed some more at the look of disappointment on Kili's face, before quickly going to put the annoying piece of lingerie in my room.

Yes, I had changed. I was changing. I could tell I was a different person already and it scared me slightly. On the other hand I couldn't help but feel relieved too. I didn't mind who I was starting to become.

As I sat next to Nori who was once again smoking rather peacefully, I wondered whether those men had any idea about the influence they were having on me. I felt better in my skin here; it felt as if I was slowly starting to find myself. At 25, you'd think that I'd know already who I was. Well apparently not. This person who was speaking aloud and scolding grown men, this person who could accept embarrassment and could tease people back…this person was someone I could start to appreciate.

I was slowly growing out of my shell and I wasn't stupid, I knew I owed it mostly to these strange and cheeky people.

While everyone, except for Kili who had left to look for Dís and Fili who had followed him, was sitting back around the table still chuckling slightly, I smiled to myself. I really enjoyed it here.

For the first time, I suddenly realized I could really grow to love this place more than I ever did my world.

I might very well be one day thankful for ending up here, with these people.

* * *

A bit later, in the early evening, we were all gathered in the living room. Dori had lighted a huge fire in the hearth. I sat in a chair close to the fire, Nori facing me though he was slightly hidden by the shadows casted by the flames. The dwarves were enjoying their ale, even Dori and Ori, while I peacefully sipped at my tea. At some point, Bofur decided that our evening had been peaceful enough and thought it'd be fun to try and coerce me into drinking ale too.

"Come on lass, it was so much fun last time."

"No Bofur.' I answered sternly.

"Last time? What last time?" Dori wondered.

I glanced at Ori. Had no one told Dori about my little escapade in the Halls' corridors? I was pretty certain that the King at least would have somehow found a way to tell Dori to keep a closer eye on his 'human'. Ori shrugged slightly and shook his head from side to side.

"Well, the time after she got lost in the corridors…' Bofur started.

"You got lost in the corridors?' He asked turning to look at me with wide eyes. 'Why did you get lost in the corridors?

"Hem, I was looking for Bofur and…" He didn't give me time to finish my sentence.

"Why didn't you ask Nori to show you the way?"

"Well Nori wasn't here so…' I tried to say before Dori once more interrupted me to turn towards his brother.

"You weren't there? You left Ori and Amelia alone and she got lost?"

I could already feel it was going to quickly turn into a yelling match. Ori's sad face and Bofur's dumbfounded one were clear enough to read. I looked at Nori who was glaring at his older brother.

"Ori is old enough to take care of Amelia.' He groaned.

I did enjoy the irony right then. After all, a few months ago it had been Nori who was angry after I got lost. In the mean time, Dori replied to him.

"You always leave and go do some thievery…What a shame! See where it leads you too! A thief! A dishonourable thief!" The ever sweet Dori snapped.

I didn't know why, but I suddenly felt that I had to intervene and stop this quarrel or Nori might just disappear for weeks once more. No way was I going to let that happen. I didn't want him to leave again and I sure didn't want to find him lying in his blood ever again. I spoke up quickly.

"Dori, please. Really nothing major happened at the time. Fili and Kili found me back and then we all had a good laugh and I got a bit drunk, that's it."

"Amelia, we should not take such a thing lightly. You're my ward, I have a responsibility towards you."

"Sure, I agree with that. But Dori, it really was nothing but an accident. You all have to start trusting me a little. I'm trying hard to adapt, but you have to make compromises too.' I was a bit tired of all their endless talks about my protection.

"Compromises?' Dori asked after everyone had remained silent for several minutes.

"Well yes. Where I come from, women are mostly independent. They live alone, they work and some choose never to get married. Women are allowed to take their own decisions and are not protected by kin or guardians anymore."

They all looked shocked at those few words. Of course I had already told them when we first met, that it was normal for me to walk around by myself, but I wasn't sure they really believed me back then. I continued carefully.

"I'm not saying I don't like how things are being done around here. I am just saying that, sometimes, you need to let me take my own decisions; accept that I might want to do things on my own or in my own way. And if I get hurt then so be it, you'd have no responsibility in it whatsoever. You need to respect my choices and wills. In exchange, I promise I'll always take into consideration your opinion."

"Amelia, it's not really how things are done here…"

"Are you telling me that any of you would go and order Dís around because she's a woman?' I quirked an eyebrow at them.

"Well no…"

Dori didn't have the time to finish though, for someone knocked loudly at the door. Ori quickly stood up and opened it before stepping out of Dís' way. I blinked at seeing her appear almost magically just after I had mentioned her. Then I smirked at the sight; Dís strode in, one of her hands holding tightly on Kili's right ear. The young dwarf was bent in two, a grimace on the face, but completely silent. Fili wasn't far behind, smirking slightly and eyes alight with mirth.

"Apologize immediately.' Dís snapped at her youngest son.

"I'm…I'm really sorry lady Amelia and I promise I won't ever come close to your bindings. Ow, mother…' he whined when Dís yanked slightly on his ear. 'I'm deeply ashamed at my childish behaviour. It was totally unbecoming of my status. I am really sorry and hope you'll accept my deepest, sincerest apology."

I had a hard time stopping the slight smirk that threatened to pop on my face. Bofur coughed lightly and I knew he was struggling not to laugh aloud. I didn't pay attention to him though and glanced at Dís. She looked clearly uncertain; apparently she wasn't sure I hadn't been deeply offended by her son's actions. I reassured her with a smile and a nod before accepting Kili's apology.

"I'm sorry to have intruded like this on your evening' Dís then said, nodding at each dwarf 'But this matter simply couldn't wait."

"Oh, but Dís, it's actually perfect that you're here!' I suddenly exclaimed, a sly smirk on the lips.

"Is it now?' Her face remained impassive as I nodded.

"Yes, I was just telling them that they should let me take my own decisions, even if it means allowing me to make mistakes and maybe get hurt." I said quickly, hoping Dori wouldn't interrupt me.

"And what do you all think of that?" Dís asked the dwarves.

They all shifted uncomfortably on their seats. I could see that they hesitated to tell anything to Dís who had finally let her son go. Kili was now rubbing at his ear vigorously while taking a few steps away from his mother. I glanced at the dwarves around; it was both strange and funny to see them so uncertain in front of Dís, though I had to admit that even I would be squirmy under Dís steely gaze.

"Well, we just think that Amelia should be careful in what she does.' Dori tried to be diplomatic.

"She's old enough to take her own decisions.' Dís countered.

"Old enough? She's but a child…' Nori muttered and I glared at him.

"A child that saved your life recently, if I recall correctly…' Dís stated matter-of-factly and I smiled broadly at her.

"We just don't want to see her hurt."

"And I don't want my sons to behave like idiots. They do though."

"Oy!' Fili complained before shrinking under his mother's glare.

"I'm her guardian, it's my responsibility to take care of her.' Dori insisted.

"True, but it doesn't mean you have to suffocate her. It just means that you have to be here when she does make mistakes.' Dís answered in a shrug.

"I'm not a reckless person Dori. I'm happy you're so concerned about me and that you all take care of me. But I just wish for a little more trust and liberties. I cannot ask you permission for everything I do, and I don't want you to protect me from everything. It's alright if I get hurt sometimes. That's how someone grows, by making mistake and learning from them."

Dís nodded, clearly agreeing with me, but I could see that the dwarves around were reluctant, even though Bofur did seem to understand and slightly agree with me. Dori, Nori and Ori were all frowning, pouting really, just like children. It would have been fun if I hadn't known that it meant they just didn't understand me. I glanced at Dís who simply stared back. Obviously she thought she had already said enough and that it was now my problem to solve.

Well I guess she had helped a lot already. I sighed and walked to Dori to put my hand on his arm.

"I'm not saying I want to go run around and do dangerous things. I'm not stupid, well not that stupid I mean. It's just, I want you to understand that at some point I might need to take decisions on my own and even if you think I'm making a mistake, I would like you to simply explain to me why you think so and then let me make the final decision."

"It might prove difficult to let you do something when I know it could hurt you."

"But if you don't let me experience it on my own, then I will never be able to become stronger."

"You don't have to become stronger. You have us with you.' Nori groaned, clearly upset.

"I trust you all, but I want to be strong. I want to… Everyone around is so strong, I don't want to remain the little, helpless human girls anymore."

"I don't think many people see you like that…' Ori thought aloud.

"Maybe not, but that's how I see myself.' I replied softly before turning back to Dori. ' So, what do you think? Will you all be able to let me take some decisions on my own?"

Dori was stiff and clearly grumpy, though when his eyes fell on me, I could only see concern and kindness in them. He put his large hand on my much smaller one and squeezed it slightly.

"I can't promise you anything, but I swear I'll try."

I smiled broadly at him. Knowing he would at least think about it felt like a huge victory already. I wouldn't lie and say that I didn't like the fact that the dwarves took care of me. Actually it usually felt great in a sort of odd, guilty way, to be pampered by them as if I was something precious. Yet, I couldn't forget entirely notions I had known all my life before I came up here. The fact that dwarvish women were pampered was all nice and good, but I could tell that some of them were more independent.

I couldn't put aside my need for freedom. Even though I had always been a rather introverted person and had always dutifully listened to my aunt and uncle, I had been able to take my own decisions. Considering our family's past, my uncle and aunt hadn't at first been happy with my choice of study and career. Still, it had been my choice and even though it had brought me more pain than I could have imagined, I still didn't regret choosing to follow that path.

The three brothers had to understand that I simply couldn't live a life where I would have to always follow their decisions. Saying goodbye at Thorin's Halls' entrance and then wait patiently for weeks until they came back, was clearly not the life I was dreaming of. No I couldn't picture myself in such a way. I couldn't see myself obeying their every order and never voicing my opinion, never taking choices. Of course I wasn't the kind of person to speak loudly and freely. And of course until now I had truly nothing to complain about, but I felt that it was better to state right now that I didn't intend to obey blindly to all their decisions.

Dori apparently respected my opinion and, even though it was obvious he didn't like it, Nori was grudgingly accepting it too. Ori surprised me though, because he simply smirked. He clearly was as protective of me as his brothers, but he could understand my point of view rather easily. After all, his brothers tended to over protect him too.

In the end, Dís, Fili and Kili stayed with us during the whole evening and we improvised a dinner with what we could find in the cellars. I was a bit ashamed I had forgotten to go and buy food, but in the end, there was always plenty to eat anyway.

I looked at the dwarves around and was glad we had that discussion earlier. I didn't know what was in store for me in the future, but I couldn't find it in myself to be worried. Somehow, knowing the three brothers had my back was reassuring enough. I knew perfectly well that, even if I were to take a bad decision, they would still be there for me.

For the first time I realized how at ease I felt around here. How easy it was becoming for me to speak up for myself when I had never done so. It felt strangely thrilling to be able to voice my opinion and better yet, it was exhilarating that people around would actually listen to what I said.

All in all I was in a sort of giddy state of mind all evening and just couldn't sleep. After having spent some hours turning and tossing in my bed, I decided to simply go back to the kitchen and prepare myself a calming infusion. Silence was reigning in the dark rooms and the only light that filtered was that of the moon; we hadn't shut the shutters in the kitchen that night.

I was holding a candle that I had lighted in my room; I still needed to use an ember for that, I seemed completely unable to light a fire without a proper, modern, lighter. Thus I was glad to see there were still embers in the oven and I just needed to add some wood and wait before it would warm enough.

As I was patiently waiting I felt, more than saw or heard, something shift in my back. I turned, not expecting to see anything or anyone.

"Holy cr… Nori!" I gasped, startled.

One of my hands was clutching at my tunic, above my heart, which was pounding loudly in my chest. The sneaky bastard had scared me.

"Couldn't you simply tell me you were there?' I whispered angrily, still shaken by his sudden appearance in the room.

"Sorry." He mumbled.

He was hidden in the shadows, as always, leaning against the far wall, arms crossed against his chest. I couldn't see his face clearly and much less his eyes, but I knew he was observing me. I shrugged and turned my back to him. He gave me some time for my poor heart to calm down and after long minutes of silence, he finally spoke his mind.

"Why are you so…careless about your own safety?" He whispered and I had actually trouble to hear him.

I didn't answer at first. The metal of the oven was hot now and the water I had put in a small pan was almost boiling already. I mechanically prepared my infusion of chamomile, poured it in a cup and silently went to sit at the table. After a few minutes, Nori took a seat in front of me. Now at least I could see a bit of his features.

"I could ask you the same question, don't you think?" I said in a murmur.

I looked up slightly and saw that he was turning his pipe in his hands, a frown on his face. At some point though, he glanced at me and we stared at each other for a short while before I decided to speak.

"Nori' I sighed 'Can't you see why I need to do that?"

Looking at his deepening frown I guessed we were not going to go anywhere with this discussion. I suddenly felt fear growing in the pit of my stomach. What if we ended up arguing like last time? I didn't want to go back to this awful months where we didn't speak with each other. I had to make him understand, and I had to do it without angering him. I swallowed the lump that was starting to form in my throat and told him softly.

"Nori you disappear, sometimes for weeks, and you risk your life every time you leave."

"It's not the same.' He grumbled, interrupting me.

"You're right, it's not.' I continued just as softly. 'It's not because I won't put my life at risk, I'm not asking you to let me do that. Besides I know you're leaving for a reason and I don't ask you to stop, even though it scared me more than anything else to see you…"

I couldn't manage to say the words. An image of Nori, pale, bloody and weak crossed my mind and I squeezed my eyes shut for a second. I shook my head slightly; I dearly hoped never to see him in such a state ever again.

"All I want, all I ask' I said after a few minutes. 'Is that you give me the opportunity to make my choices. Just as I let you make yours, even though it's hard, even though it's against your beliefs."

"You don't understand. I can't.' He whispered before pausing for a short while. 'I can't let you get hurt. I can't let you make a choice that I know will hurt you in the end."

He had stopped playing with his pipe now and I saw that his fists were clenched tightly. On a sudden impulse, I extended my arm and leant over the table before I took one of his hands in mine. I squeezed it lightly and Nori startled before looking in my eyes.

"Nori. It will hurt me more in the end if you never let me make my decisions." I said holding his gaze.

His eyes reflected how torn he felt at that moment and I knew I certainly mirrored his feelings. I was asking him something that quite obviously went against all his instincts. It was strange to realize that for all his fussing and worrying, Dori wasn't actually the most protective of the three brothers. I was now quite certain that Nori was. In his own quiet, discreet and sneaky way, Nori was the one that took the most risks and in counterpart tried to protect everyone the most.

Realizing that made me see our dispute on a whole new level and I finally understood what had angered him so much the last time. It wasn't me getting lost or coming back drunk with Ori the next morning. It probably wasn't the fact that I made light of the situation either. No. From what I understood now, it was the uncertainty, the lack of control and the fact that he had been entirely unable to help and protect me that had angered him so much. Now I guessed that he probably had been more furious against himself than he was against me.

"You can't imprison me here Nori. I told you already.' He winced, clearly remembering my words. 'Just like I can't stop you when you have to go out and search for whatever it is you're looking for."

"Amelia…I.' He sighed and shook his head.

"I don't like the fact that you're a thief. I can't even start to tell you how much it scares me to even think about what could happen to you because I know you'll soon disappear again. Actually, considering the fact that I found you dying on the floor, I'm pretty sure I'd rather bind you on that seat and spoon feed you for the rest of your life, than letting you go out again."

After those words, Nori looked at me and I could see a small twinkle in his eyes. He arched his eyebrow then and I could even spot a tiny smirk on his lips. I simply shrugged, it truly wasn't far from what I was feeling, and spoke once more.

"Still, even though I hate it, even though I can't agree with your choice, I won't stop you. I won't even try to do it because I know it's something you need to do. I need to be able to make my own choices. Can't you trust me at all?' I whispered, keeping my voice as soft as possible.

"I do trust you.' He sighed deeply before continuing. 'I won't stop you. I'll let you make your choices.' He sounded so defeated then that it hurt me.

"Nori, I swear I'm not going to run directly towards danger. I'm just asking you to listen to my opinion, especially when it concerns my life, just like you'd listen to Dís."

"But you're not Dís, you weren't born in this world. You know nothing of its dangers."

"And that's why I have you to advise me.' I softly replied. 'Besides, I'm obliged to be cautious about what I do; Dori would probably have a heart attack if the both of us started to run around in the wild recklessly."

Nori looked at me and I saw the corner of his mouth slightly quirk upwards. During all this time my hand had been on his but at that moment he turned his hand to grab mine.

"We wouldn't want my poor brother to suffer that, now would we?' He said, squeezing my hand and I smiled softly at him before answering.

"Aye, that's why I will stay level headed and serious while you run recklessly around and worry all of us." I mock sighed.

Nori smirked at me and I felt that we had reached an understanding of sort. I hoped he knew I wouldn't risk my life on purpose or suddenly become reckless.

"It means a lot that you trust me Nori." I whispered once more.

He didn't answer, simply hummed slightly and squeezed my hand. I felt suddenly tired and Nori must have realized it for he let my hand go and stood up. I looked at him while he slowly came to stand beside me. He put his hand on my shoulder and gently squeezed it.

"You should rest now."

"I'm the healer here, and you're the one that was injured a few weeks ago. Go to bed Nori or I'll make you." I admonished him, though a smile tugged at my lips.

He quirked his eyebrow and smirked before he leaned and whispered directly in my ear.

"Really?"

He winked at me then and simply left silently while I couldn't stop a broad smile to grow on my face.

Once I was back in my room I shook my head, still smiling. I was relieved to have been able to talk with Nori, and really glad that our discussion hadn't degenerated into another dispute. I knew I was asking him something difficult but I trusted him to respect his own words. I hoped he knew I wouldn't ask them to let me do really stupid things. It wasn't in me anyway to become someone reckless. I was too cautious, level headed and rational to ever put myself into some weird, dangerous and uncertain situation.

Still I found myself curious about my own capacities. I had always been doubtful about what I could do and had never been eager to discover things that were out of my 'comfort zone'. Now though I felt like I could, and should, be able to explore a bit more what I was capable of. I wanted to better know who I was, who I could be and become.

I now lived among people who were hardened by life to an extreme point. Most of them had seen or experienced things I hoped never to experience myself; who would actually want to face a bloody dragon or wander the wild and continuously have to fight for his life? No, those weren't the kind of experiences I wanted to have. But still, they were strong. And I didn't speak only of their physical strength. No. I respected them more than they could imagine simply because they were able to live on, to laugh and joke, despite all the hardship they encountered.

I wanted to be like that. I didn't want to be the weak girl who'd run away at each difficulty, the one who'd lower her head and walk away when she was hurt by others.

I doubted the dwarves knew it, but they were slowly influencing me.

And I really couldn't be mad with them for such an influence.

* * *

**A/N: Hello everyone! First of all, thanks for the reviews :) You are all awesome! Thanks to Sofia, Mary and the nameless guest who reviewed too! **

**Thanks to Kapibarasan too for the tip about quotations, I hope it's more clear now like that. :P**

**Now... Most of you asked me what Nori was looking for...I won't tell you but I promise you'll have the answer at some point in later chapters :) Be patient ^^**

**About this chapter... First don't expect all the others to be so huge, this one is a bit of an exception and I just didn't want to cut it in two. That aside, I'm not entirely happy with how the two talks came out (with Dori and with Nori). I hope you're not too disappointed. I felt that both were needed, but I'm not convinced with what I made of them...anyway, what's done is done and after re-reading and editing this chapter so many times, I just can't see it anymore ^^**

**The next update will likely be on Monday or Tuesday. Starting next chapter, we'll go in slightly more adventurous waters :)**

**Thank you all for your support! It's really great and motivating!**


	15. Off to see the World

**Everything belongs to JRR Tolkien except for my OC and the plot**

* * *

Time slowly passed and I realized one day I had completely lost count of the months I had spent within the dwarves' halls. It dawned on me quite suddenly and I was completely befuddled by my own lack of interest in the passing time.

It wasn't really surprising actually, considering I never stepped out of the mountain. I had spent entire months living inside the halls without even feeling the need to see the sky. How odd was that? According to Ori, it wasn't odd at all; it just highlighted how perfectly I fitted within the dwarves' households. I hadn't answered to this claim, feeling that it made Ori happy to think I was adapting so well to their culture, and maybe, just maybe, he wasn't that far from the truth.

The moment I had come to realize about this time issue was a perfectly normal day; after leaving the healing wards, I had gone to the market, intent on buying some more meat for that evening's dinner. Before going to the meat and other food stands though, I went to see whether Bifur would be here. The seemingly silent dwarf had always intrigued me even though we couldn't really communicate. With that blasted axe in his head I had that odd morbid urge to check on him frequently, and I hadn't seen him in awhile. Making my way through the crowd of dwarves I suddenly realized how cold it felt.

The temperature within the halls was usually quite unchanging, which was comfortable, though I always found it a bit too cool, thus the massive use of roaring fires in dwarves' houses. Right now though, the temperature wasn't cool, it was damn freaking cold. I looked around to realize that most dwarves and the few humans I could see, were wearing long leather coats, hats, fur lined coats and other scarves and mittens.

I glanced toward the massive opened doors and found out the landscape wasn't its usual mixture of blue stones, green trees and brown grounds. Instead it was all painted in white, coated in fresh snow.

My eyes widened as I did the math in my head. I had been here for at least six months, probably closer to seven, if there was snow outside. I had arrived in early June, if I considered the time of the year hadn't changed from my world to this one.

Stepping once more in the general direction of Bifur's stand, I kept musing on this new realization. I truly hadn't been thinking about my family and world in the past month. Actually my life had been really peaceful and uneventful recently and my days were spent similarly, following a quiet routine.

The nightmares that had plagued my nights at first were all but a memory. The fright at the situation had long disappeared. I had adapted fairly well and didn't think about things I missed; electricity, chocolate and coconut had long been forgotten. I had adapted fairly well to my life with Dori, Nori and Ori. The three of them had been almost constantly here these past few weeks, even Nori, though I knew he wanted to get out and look for those…things. Yes, I enjoyed my life with the three of them, to the point where my family was pushed in the back of my mind.

I gasped at finding out how I hadn't thought about my family in such a long time. At first they had been ever present in my mind. Now though my thoughts were busy with medicinal plants, ointments recipes and people I had come to care greatly about.

How could someone change so quickly? Wasn't what I did a sort of betrayal?

I had arrived in front of Bifur but didn't really see him; actually I didn't even see Bofur smiling at me from under a weird hat I had never seen him use before. The two dwarves exchanged a glance before Bofur walked to me, stopping a step away. It took him waving his hand in front of my nose to see him.

"Bofur, hey, it's been awhile.' I said, slightly startled.

"What is it? You looked like you were miles away."

"I was … thinking… of my previous home." I answered slowly in a small voice, looking down.

I felt Bofur's finger under my chin as he forced me to look up at his exceptionally serious eyes. I really wasn't used to see his face with a slight concerned frown.

"I understand you miss your home, but aren't you alright here?"

I looked at him forlornly, riddled with guilt, and shook my head.

"You don't understand. I'm perfectly fine here, it's just I hadn't thought of it in awhile and I hadn't pay attention to the time passing. I was surprised is all."

"It is natural for you to try and adapt. It's been around eight months now…" He said before I interrupted him.

"Eight months?" I was puzzled by that information.

Eight months? Had it really been that long? How come I didn't see the days pass at all? How? Bofur clearly saw the effect such information had on me, he kindly patted my shoulder and talked in a soothing tone.

"You shouldn't let it worry you. You adapted fairly well to life here, among us. I dare say you like it too.' He paused then and a sad frown marred his usually cheery face. 'But I'm afraid you'll always have mixed feelings now, just as many dwarves living here have."

"What do you mean?" I frowned, choosing to concentrate on the last sentences he said.

"You have two homes now." He shrugged. "Same as us. We have Erebor, which we'll always long for. And we have this place that we came to love out of necessity. I wish you'll feel at home with us, but I believe you'll always miss your previous one."

Even though it was weird when Bofur spoke seriously, I felt he was right about this and I nodded to show I agreed, somehow. Yet I needed to speak with someone and he and Bifur were here to listen, so I muttered.

"There is a difference though. A major one."

"Well it's true we could still try and reclaim Erebor…"He started but I cut in.

"That's not it. You said you came to love it here because it was necessary. What disturbs me most is that I feel better here than I ever did back there. I love this place more already, and it scares me. I feel like I'm betraying…them."

Bofur's look showed perfectly how compassionate this dwarf could be. His soft smile alone warmed my heart and I couldn't resist smiling back.

"There's nothing wrong in that Meli."

I quirked an eyebrow at this new nickname and I smirked slightly.

"Meli?"

"Aye." He laughed loudly. "Amelia is definitely too long a name for someone living here with us."

"Meli it is then…" I knew a lost battle when I saw one. Dwarves were too stubborn for their own good and Bofur seemed quite happy with this newfound nickname.

I was astonished as to how a few words, a smile and a laugh from this man could so easily affect my mood and change it for the better. I sighed softly and chose to change topics.

"What's that thing on your head by the way? Is it still alive?" I joked poking gingerly at his hat.

"Oy lass, never, ever say anything bad about his hat!"

I turned to face the dwarf whose booming voice had prevented Bofur to defend his hat's honour.

"Hello Gloin. So the hat is off limits?" I said and winked at Bofur who glared at me playfully.

"Aye, he made it himself when he was a wee lad.' Gloin answered and I distinctly heard Bifur huff a chuckle behind me.

"Oh that explains the craftsmanship then." I joked.

"Well…in truth he lost a bet." Gloin started before Bofur cut in.

"Oy! I won that bet and you know it!' He complained loudly while Bifur chuckled some more.

"You're wearing that thing every winter or every time you go out. I don't consider that winning." Gloin laughed heartily.

I saw Bofur was getting ready to reply but I cut in, truly curious about this hat now.

"Stop, I'm quite sure there's a story I don't know behind this whole hat affair. And I want to hear it." I extended my arms in both their directions and looked questioningly at Gloin after sending an evil grin in Bofur's direction.

"We made a bet, how long ago was it already? Well anyway we made that bet that Bofur wouldn't be able to sew a proper hat. He ended up creating that…thing currently on his head, and asked us to pay off our losses. When we complained that it wasn't a proper hat, he put it on his head and said as long as he wore it, then it was a hat. We paid up but made sure he never had anything else on his head. Since then he became quite protective of it."

I smiled a toothy grin at Bofur, feeling suddenly in quite a childish mood, and with a swift and quick swap with my hand I managed to grab the hat. Bofur had ducked, apparently thinking I was going to slap him, easing my job immensely. I was certain that his dwarf's reflexes wouldn't have allowed me to take a hold of the offending object otherwise.

As soon as I had the hat in my hand, I dashed away, waving in the crowd, laughing because for once my tiny, smaller shape was a distinct advantage to slalom between dwarves and stands. I had heard Bofur's shout of protest and both Gloin's and Bifur's laugh. I glanced above my shoulder and squeaked when I saw the dwarf was close to catch me already.

I quickly put the hat on my head and concentrated on taking the most complicated way to reach the exist. Once I arrived at the massive doors, I stopped and turned. Bofur wasn't far behind and, to my relief, wasn't offended by my mad dash. On the contrary he seemed greatly amused by it all.

"Lass, this is a declaration of war, you have to know that."

"Nuh uh. It's retribution for all the time you made fun of me."

At that he broke into a loud laugh, holding his sides. I soon joined him for his laugh was quite contagious. It felt so good to laugh over something so silly, it was somehow so liberating. For a moment, all my worries eased away. After awhile, once we had calmed down, I threw his hat back at him and he caught it easily.

"I'm actually impressed, I'd never be able to do anything even remotely as good as that" I said pointing at his hat.

At the same time I heard known voices arriving from behind me and I quickly turned to meet with Dori, Balin, Dwalin, the King and his two nephews.

"Amelia, what are you doing here?' Dori asked me genuinely curious.

"Stealing Bofur's hat.' I deadpanned, earning quirked eyebrows from everyone and chuckles from the two younger dwarves. 'What about you?"

"We were discussing another trading trip I'll have to make soon." Dori answered simply.

I didn't know what had gotten into me that day but I suddenly blurted out.

"Oh, can I go with you this time?"

All the dwarves stared at me in silence for several long minutes and I shifted on my feet, feeling uneasy under their scrutiny. I didn't think my question was stupid though, actually it was quite legitimate. Why couldn't I go out with Dori?

"It wouldn't be wise for a little girl to do such a journey." Dwalin groaned.

"First, I'm not little, slightly short maybe but I didn't think people around would hold it against me." At that Fili and Kili smirked but I didn't pay attention to them and kept on. "Second I really want to go. I haven't been outside the halls since my arrival and the night those men…well you know." I pleaded.

"That's exactly why we do not wish for you to go on such journey. It is dangerous and you have no mean to fend for yourself." Balin tried to explain but I was having none of it.

"Maybe, but on the other hand I'll never learn if no one teach me. Plus, if this journey is so dangerous, you might need a healer. And finally I promise I'll obey everything you say and would not leave your side for a second. There'd be absolutely no risk for me to get lost in the wild."

I looked at Dori and Balin who seemed to hesitate. I glanced quickly around and mentally counted my chances. Dwalin was apparently absolutely against me leaving the halls. Bofur, Fili and Kili were smiling, which I guessed was a good sign. And finally the King still had the same unreadable frown, which didn't help me whatsoever.

I was about to try and plead my case again when Fili, the older nephew, spoke.

"Uncle, maybe if you don't agree for her to go to this trip, then she could come with us."

"For the last time, you're not going anywhere Fili!" The King grunted.

"You said we shouldn't go alone because Kili was too reckless and we were too often wounded and hurt. If she comes with us on a mission, then her presence would force us to be more careful, because we'll have to protect her."

"And if we go on a short mission, she'll be able to get out of the halls and the risks would be minor." Kili piped in.

"Fili, Kili, you're not experienced enough to go alone, especially not if that means taking an extra charge with you." The King sighed and I tried not to get offended by the whole 'charge' part.

"Amelia could go with us actually; she'd be safe in such a group and we aren't going far anyway."

Everyone's eyes snapped to Balin who was now smiling nicely. He looked at each one of us, winking at me and continued.

"I'm sure she'd be perfectly safe with us brother. Between you, me and the others, there's almost no risk for her. Besides, if Amelia gets used to travel, we might add her healer services to our mercenary skills' list. She'd be able to travel a bit, and we'd all be able to profit from it."

"But what about us?" Kili still tried unsuccessfully.

I hadn't thought about the money argument, but I guessed Balin being a dwarf would think about it quickly. In the end, that was his idea that won. Dwarves really loved their profit, though I wasn't fair by saying that. Everyone here worked hard, slaving away willingly in the mines and forges in order for the whole community to earn money and shape the halls into a kingdom to be proud of.

In the end, I was allowed to go simply because Balin was my guardian and had agreed. Fili and Kili though, were still stuck in the Halls for as long as their uncle and mother decided against them going on a mission. I felt bad for them, but at the moment I was entirely too happy to empathise that much and instead of listening to their complaints, I rushed to the healing wards to tell Oin about my absence.

Oin hadn't been too enchanted when I told him I would leave the Halls for approximately a week. He had forced me to repeat my sentences four times and I was slowly starting to believe that this was his way of punishing me. This dwarf had the uncanny habit of hearing perfectly sometimes…and not at all at other moments. I knew he was partially deaf, but still, I was starting to wonder how much he really was.

In the end he grumbled, grunted, huffed and groaned before leaving me in the middle of the healing wards to go to the back room. I didn't need to be a genius to understand that he didn't like the fact I would be leaving on the morrow and didn't want to talk about it anymore.

I didn't waste more time, Oin clearly didn't want to discuss this, and he wasn't the worse dwarf I would have to face that day.

Nope.

As I made my way towards the brothers' house, I wondered how they would react. Dori hadn't been happy earlier, but I wasn't sure what Nori and Ori would say. We had a conversation a while ago about me taking my own decisions, but I hadn't put it into practice until now. I wasn't sure how they would take the fact that it had already been decided.

When I pushed the door to enter I took a deep breath and put a large smile on my face.

Awhile later, after the endless arguments were finally over, I was finally allowed to leave; not that the brothers could have stopped me anyway but I guessed they felt slightly better to have 'allowed' me to go. Silly dwarves…

In the end, the day that had started fairly normally ended up with me borrowing a travel bag from Ori and trying to prepare it with his help while Nori was complaining and Dori worrying.

* * *

"For the last time Nori, I'll be fine. I'm going with four dwarves. One of them is Balin, I'm pretty sure he knows how to fight and even Dwalin is coming, surely he's strong enough to protect us, right? Besides we're just leaving for one small week. I'll be back before you miss me."

My attempt at a joke fell flat and Nori's face was expressing quite magnificently how unimpressed he was by my attitude. He was about to complain again when I stopped him and said.

"Please Nori, I need to do this. I want to go out and see your world. Our world I think I should say, for I don't believe after eight months here that I'll ever find my way back." I had almost whispered the last part and I saw Nori frown.

"Amelia, our land is dangerous.' He told me obviously worried already. "There are bandits, wolves, goblins, orcs, elves…" He started to enumerate.

"I know. But I won't be alone. I'm sure the others will protect me. And as I said, there is absolutely no risk in this mission. We just have to go there, negotiate some new contracts and that's it. It's almost like a stroll in the halls."

"Remind me what happened the last time you took a stroll in the halls by yourself?"

"Oy, that's harsh and you know it! Come on, even you have to admit I don't risk anything with this mission and those dwarves." I insisted.

Nori didn't look convinced and left me alone with Ori who had stayed silent until then.

"He's just worried.' Ori sweetly whispered. 'We all are." He added.

"I know Ori. I know because I worry each time Dori goes or Nori disappears. But I really want to do this. I feel like it's about time for me to have a look around."

Ori smiled sadly and nodded. He then looked a bit sheepish before taking something from one of his pockets and handing it to me.

"Here, I always have one with me, I find it…reassuring? Anyway, it's just in order to keep your mind occupied or to have something to do in the evenings…And you might find something interesting to write…or not."

I smiled gratefully at Ori and took the small notebook and pencil he had in his hands.

"Thanks Ori, I'm sure I'll find things to write, and we'll have plenty of topics to talk about when I'll be back."

I was fairly sure he understood why I had insisted to go because he knew how much I had been struggling with many different thoughts at times. He had been here all along to help me put them in order. Ori was a dear friend and he knew I had been asking myself questions about this world and my oddly agreeable feelings about it.

I looked up when I heard Nori coming back in my room.

"Here, take this with you.' He grumbled while he handed me a sort of short knife.

The weapon was really short, probably not more than six inches long, the silvery blade was straight and less than two inches wide. Its handle had been wrapped tightly in a thin leather strip. It appeared to me that this weapon had been made to be useful and practical instead of pretty. Nori gave me a leather sheath too, to protect the blade and avoid cutting myself.

"It's one of my smaller daggers, be careful, I sharpened it a few days ago." He gruffly said.

"Nori, I wouldn't know how to use it." I told him, ready to refuse his present.

"Take it anyway. It might prove useful. You shouldn't go unarmed. I won't let you go without at least this."

I looked at him. His eyes had lost their usual cheeky glint. They looked incredibly worried and concerned instead. His brows were furrowed in a frown and I could easily read how much he wanted me to stay here. As I saw how much he seemed to struggle with himself at the moment, clearly hesitating between allowing me to go and imprisoning me here, I decided I wouldn't fight him about the dagger. If it made him feel better, I'd agree to take a sword even. I slowly nodded, taking the weapon, and I turned to put it in my bag when Dori rushed in.

"Here, I bought you new boots. You can't go in all this snow with your current shoes. The valleys will be fine, but the mountain paths might be tricky and icy. Put these on, try them."

"Thank you Dori" I beamed at him.

I turned my back to them, trying to hide my unshaved legs from their sight even though dwarves wouldn't actually mind that. Still, old habits die hard, besides these men would mind seeing a woman's legs anyway. I wondered whether I should chuckle at that or not, it all felt so completely different than what used to be normal in my previous life.

The boots were perfect; they fit and were made of thick brown leather and with warm and soft fur inside. It was incredibly comfortable to wear. I jumped then took a few steps before I turned toward the three men.

"They're wonderful, thanks!"

"You should put the dagger in it. It'll be safer to have it on you at all time and you can lose a bag. It's harder to lose a boot." Nori said quite obviously unhappy still. "Here, use this to strap the sheath on your shin."

He handed me some more leather bands and quickly illustrated on his own leg how I should put them properly. Imitating his moves, I was soon able to efficiently strap a dagger and hide it in my boot. Well, I would never have thought I'd ever learn anything like that.

That evening the three brothers spent their whole time giving me advices about anything and everything really. It got to the point that my head actually started to hurt and I had to stop them and retreat back in my room.

* * *

In the early morning, Dori came to wake me and guided me to the kitchen where he had prepared a voluminous breakfast. Bofur, Balin and Dwalin were here already and I slowed my steps.

"We're leaving already? I'm late?" I asked my second guardian.

"No, Meli, they just decided to meet you here. No one would want you to get lost in the Halls before the journey even start. "

"Very funny Bofur…" I said ironically as he burst into happy laugh. "And why are you here anyway? Are you coming with us?"

"Nah, I just wanted to say goodbye."

I wanted to reply to him, but Nori's attention had been caught up by something else and he didn't give me the time to speak. He looked up and frowned, eyeing Bofur.

"Meli?" He glanced at me then and I shrugged.

"He said my name was too complicated for his brain to remember." I answered him while grabbing some bread.

"Oy!"

"It doesn't suit her at all!' Ori piped in, and Dori nodded.

Balin shook his head, smiling softly as if he knew already what was going to happen and Dwalin simply grunted while he kept on eating a huge plate of bacon and eggs.

"Oh … and then what would you use lad?" Bofur turned to look at Ori with a small smirk on his lips.

"Hmmm I'll have to think about it."

"Nicknames shouldn't be thought about!" Bofur exclaimed.

"Sure they should!"

"No they shouldn't!"

I sighed and chose to ignore their childish banter, concentrating on my breakfast. While the others were really arguing over a potential nickname for me, I started to eat as much as I could.

"You should wear your breeches and tunic instead of this dress." Nori whispered to me while poking at the half eaten sausage left in his plate.

He really was unhappy with me leaving if it hindered his appetite so much…

I glanced at the dress I had put on automatically and nodded. He was right of course and it'd be a nice occasion to wear them without risking everyone glancing at me awkwardly.

"I'll go change quickly."

"You have some time." He said pointing his fingers at the other dwarves. "They're not going to agree on anything any time soon and Dwalin still has to eat his third serving."

I laughed softly before finishing my breakfast and sneaking back in my room to change. When I came back they had finally stopped their stupid argument and Dwalin seemed ready to leave.

Dori, Nori, Ori and Bofur insisted on accompanying us to the massive doors and it made my heart swell with warmth and love for these dwarves.

I hugged each of them before stepping back as Balin, Dwalin, Hràr and Péri, the merchants that came with us, started to trail down the path. I quickly started to follow them, though I couldn't help but glancing over my shoulder and waving at the three brothers and Bofur one last time. I was going to miss them.

I felt a strange, unusual feeling of uneasiness and slight pain. It made me frown and if any of the other realized my mood had suddenly changed, none commented on it. We walked at a rapid pace, well as rapidly as we could, considering the layer of snow and ice coating parts of the path we followed for now.

The landscape was really amazing and the mountains' tops that were looming far above us shone in the sun. I didn't feel the cold, thanks to my warm clothes and the rapid pace we kept, but I could smell the unmistakable odour of fresh snow. Thankfully the layer of snow on the path we were walking was rather thin, a few inches only, and we could walk pretty easily without slipping on hidden ice patches.

The blue tinged stones mixed wonderfully with the white snow and the other greyish rocks. The ice at the top of the mountain glinted and added to the overall blue tones of the whole landscape. All in all I could only say it was breath taking to see such a wonderful sight.

Travelling with Dwalin, Balin, Hràr and Péri was awkward. Péri didn't speak much with me; he seemed like a real grumpy dwarf and barely uttered a few words in answer for any question asked. Actually if he could simply answer by 'yes' or 'no' he seemed perfectly fine, better yet if a grunt sufficed. I wondered many times why such an unfriendly character had been sent to negotiate new contracts. Surely the ability to act nicely and diplomatically was important? Apparently not to this dark haired and bearded dwarf…and Hràr wasn't much better. Actually he wasn't far from being worse. He sometimes glared at me and groaned about women who should stay in the safety of the Halls. I didn't even try to correct the red headed dwarf who seemed a fine example of stubbornness.

After several hours I already had decided to ignore as much as possible those two moody dwarves, letting them walk ahead while I was in the back with Balin.

Dwalin for his part remained the gruff and grunting dwarf I had met so many months ago. He wasn't mean or nice; he was just minding his own business, completely uncaring of what I could do unless it was something that was dangerous, or that he considered stupid. I didn't mind him, spending most of my time with Balin who kindly answered to every question I might have. The time was passing slowly and we walked at an easy pace now, none of us seemed in a particular hurry to arrive in that town.

"So," I asked Balin after awhile spent in silence. "Where are we going exactly? What are we going to do?"

"Well, we're going to a small town called Gorm. There isn't much there, but the master has been trading with us sporadically, mostly buying trinkets and other luxury items. He bought them mostly through one of the shops held by humans that sell our products." Balin explained with a smile. "We're supposed to try and draw complete contracts with them."

"What exactly do we want from them?" I wondered.

If that town was so small, what could they offer to the dwarves? I could understand the need to sell products, but what could we have in exchange? Only money?

"This town is located on our way when our caravans leave for the southern regions. We want them to offer free lodging and food to our caravans. It will take us only three, maybe four days to go there, but a whole caravan of merchants with full trunks and chariots will almost take double the time to go down the mountain. A warm and safe spot to stop at will be greatly appreciated before rushing in the wild."

As Balin talked I understood this really was the primary reason of our mission and I doubted they would care that much about selling other products. While I thought about it though, Balin kept on explaining our goals to me.

"We'll try and see whether we can find someone to open a shop for us too. If we manage to settle some permanent shops there, we might attract people from other towns." Balin added.

"What are you planning to offer them then? Silver items? Weapons?"

I heard Dwalin snort at that and I looked at him. He was walking slightly ahead of us but he glanced at me from above his shoulder.

"They are peasants. They wouldn't know what to do with weapons." He grunted.

I nodded, idly wondering whether Dwalin wasn't underestimating them. After all, peasants or not, people in this era surely knew how to defend themselves; it seemed to me it was necessary. This reminded me that I was entirely defenceless and I frowned a bit. Would the brothers ever agree to let me learn how to defend myself? I'm sure I'd be able to convince them over time. At that moment though, Balin answered my question, forcing me to focus on him again.

"We are going to propose our products. They wouldn't have need for jewellery or weaponry, but we can sell other things. We can produce better tools for them, leather products, and copper items and for the master specifically a few luxury products."

"How is that ever going to work?" I frowned. How could one exchange items for service? It didn't make sense. "It feels as if we're going to have a better deal than them."

Dwalin snorted once more.

"Well, my dear" Balin patted my shoulder. "It's exactly what we're going to try to have."

I felt my frown deepen. Oh, sure it was entirely logical to try and obtain the best deal possible for us, but it appeared a bit extreme to me. Would the men really be that stupid? Maybe they didn't know how much dwarves could eat? And if we had a permanent shop, then all the better for our sales, but would the town's folk be able to actually profit from this? Would they even buy our products in this shop? If they were mere peasants, what need would they have for Bofur's and Bifur's lovely carved plates? Would they even have the money to buy it?

Looking at my guardian I furrowed my brows, it didn't feel like Balin cared much about all that.

* * *

That evening we decided to camp in a small area that was almost clear from snow; we had to leave the path to find it though. In this part of the mountain, pine trees were starting to grow sparingly and little by little the vegetations was turning into a dense forest; though we were still far from this part. Still, the trees were numerous enough to provide with a little protection and under their canopy, there was less snow.

When we stopped, Hràr and Péri started to gather dry wood to light a fire while Dwalin disappeared. I was starting to wonder where he was when I saw from the corner of my eyes that he had reappeared and was walking to me.

At that time, I was sitting a bit away from Hràr and Péri, my back leaning against a trunk, and I had taken Ori's gift out of my bag. Balin had smiled when he had seen me starting to write on the notebook but hadn't commented on it. In truth there wasn't much to write and I had never been one to keep a journal or anything like this. Still, it did occupy my mind to describe the landscape and the day. I even decided to write what I thought of Hràr and Péri; I had found out months ago that dwarves couldn't read English, even though we spoke the same language, that they called Westron, it appeared that the alphabet I was using differed completely from the one found around here.

It hadn't bothered me too much, Ori would read with me usually, translating when the book was written in runes, and it allowed the both of us to spend time together easily. At that moment I wondered what he was doing. We had been looking through a book of old legends this past week and we had reached the middle of the old tome already, would he wait for me before reading the rest of it?

I was clearly not paying attention to what was going on around me and this was certainly part of the reason why I jolted so violently when I felt something being thrown on my lap.

In a matter of seconds I had jumped back on my feet and stared at the thing that had hit me.

It was a bunny.

A cute white furred bunny.

A cute white furred and hurt bunny.

I quickly kneeled next to the animal whose left hind leg was broken. The poor creature was probably in a state of shock because it didn't move but I could see its little furry chest moving. Maybe I could save him?

"It's still alive." I said aloud absentmindedly.

"Oh."

I looked up at that, I truly hadn't realized that Dwalin was in front of me until he said that only word. I blinked and saw him crouched in front of me. He extended one of his large hands toward the bunny and I asked myself whether such a strong dwarf could really care about a wild bunny's health. I truly didn't think anything of it when I saw him take the animal.

And then I couldn't help but squeak loudly when Dwalin broke the bunny's neck.

All the dwarves looked at me while I looked at the now dead bunny.

To my utter shame I felt my lower lip quiver slightly and I promptly bit it to stop the movement. I looked up from the animal to Dwalin who was eyeing me with a frown on his face. Then I turned my gaze towards Balin who was clearly a bit more concerned about my apparently strange reaction.

"Now you can cook it." Dwalin grunted before leaving the camp again.

I looked at the dead animal and then at Balin.

"Are you alright my dear?" The sweet old dwarf asked me and I felt a small lump in my throat.

"The bunny…"

"Yes?"

"He's dead…"

"Yes…"

I shook my head. There was no way I would tell a dwarf that killing an animal in front of my eyes did bother me…a lot. Still, it wasn't the worst part of it all. Nope. After all, I had been ordered to cook dinner, and I had no idea how to skin the thing or prepare it.

* * *

In the end Balin had to show me what to do with this first rabbit and the second one Dwalin brought after a short while. I had to excuse myself at some point though, it really wasn't something I enjoyed looking at and it took me several minutes to calm my revolting stomach. Still, it was something I had to learn; I wanted to be allowed outside the Halls and it was entirely logical, now that I thought about it, that I wouldn't be able to find already skinned and prepared meat in the wild. Skinning animals was obviously a skill I had no choice but to learn, never mind how it made me lost my appetite.

After Balin did the first rabbit, I did my best to manage and repeat his movements on the second one. I felt pride, which seemed ridiculous, when I managed to actually force myself to skin the second one properly. Well Balin did have to help me, but in the end I felt like I had performed a small exploit.

That evening, I had to admit that the stew we prepared was tasty…and I forced myself to forget the small, cute bunny that at some point had still been alive on my lap.

* * *

It took us two more days to arrive in the lovely town of Gorm…and when I said lovely, I actually meant dreadful.

Still I couldn't find it in myself to care, Balin had told me we wouldn't stay long and were likely to be back in five or six days at most in Thorin's Halls.

After my first sight of this town, I simply couldn't wait to go back home.

When we entered the town that was our destination, I couldn't help but shiver and feel completely repelled by the sight and the smells around. I wasn't convinced that this could be called a town, not even a village actually. There were a bit more than a dozen small and low houses even though most looked like barns and sheds to me. Yep, this was a real charming place to live in if one liked dirt, mud, waste and anything that looked and smelt repulsive.

There was no pure and shining snow here to hide the misery, no, the snow was high in the mountains. Here mud coated everything. I couldn't understand how men could survive the smell and I really couldn't fathom why they would agree to live in such conditions. Was it so complicated to throw the wastes a bit further away from the streets and houses? The dwarves managed to do it, so why not the humans?

The area could have been charming too, with the mountains climbing high in the sky not too far from there and the seemingly endless forests around. The town was in the middle of small fields, but all around that I could only see the dark green of pine trees and here and there, some other leafless trees. There even was a seemingly old tree at the entrance of the village. It was riddled with mistletoes I noticed absentmindedly.

I couldn't appreciate the scenery though. There was a strange gloomy atmosphere in this town that made me uneasy quite quickly. I was just about to walk to Balin just to feel reassured by his presence when my companions reacted before I could do anything. Soon I was entirely surrounded by them, but instead of feeling suffocated by their closeness, I actually felt relieved. I was a tad surprised to see Hràr and Péri react apparently protectively towards me, but after all it was coherent with all their mumbles about women who should remain in the Halls' safety.

We slowly made our way through what I believed to be some sort of main street toward a larger place, an empty area I should say, in front of which stood a slightly bigger house, it had two stories whereas the others around didn't. I soon observed that the men around were looking at us strangely and I wondered whether they were looking at all of us or whether they had recognized me as a woman already.

Between Ori's large scarf that dissimulated the lower half of my face, the heavy coat that smoothed out my forms, my hood that hid my hair and the dwarves around me, it was doubtful that the town's men would realize I was a woman that soon. Glancing around I could see that I didn't receive anymore stares than my companions, which oddly reassured me, though it really shouldn't have.

I quickly noticed that some of the stares sent our way didn't look even remotely nice or curious. I would go so far as to say that they even looked rather hateful, some scared even.

It didn't bode well for us…

* * *

**A/N: Thanks to everyone for reading/following/reviewing this story :) it warms my heart to know some people appreciate my 'work' **

**I'm sorry I didn't update earlier...but I wasn't really happy with this chapter and the next, so yesterday I decided to remodel/ rewrite the story starting with this chapter up to the chapter 24 ... This is the reason why i might only update earliest on Friday as well. I have a bit of a writer block, and I'm hoping the remodeling of those chapters will help me solve that.**

**For this chapter, I know some of you won't like that she's not going with the Ri brothers, but I promise there's a purpose in all that. Mostly Amelia needs to grow up a bit ^^**

**I hope you did enjoy it though.**

**Thanks again for your support! You are all amazing ^^**


	16. Dwarves and Diplomacy

**As usual, everything belongs to JRRTolkien, except for my OC and the plot.**

* * *

It had been almost a month already. Three awfully long weeks, filled with tedious talks and lots of disputes. I was tired and I missed home terribly. I wanted to see Dori, Nori and Ori again. I sighed deeply, looking at the stupid rainclouds that menaced to ruin my plan if rain actually started to fall.

I was sitting on the windowsill in a small house that had been freely lent to us for the time of our stay, looking forlornly outside. I wanted to go back already. At some point during that month I had realized that in my heart, Thorin's Halls had really become my home. The frightening thing was that it had never felt so right to call a place home before. I was still missing my uncle and aunt, terribly so, but the pain of their absence was slowly being eased away by other, more cheerful, feelings. Guilt still riddled me to a certain extent, but I had come to terms with the fact I could actually have a life, a real, full life here.

I had come to see these strange men, these dwarves, as family and dear friends. It was astounding how easily these short, moody, stubborn and hairy persons could just get under your skin and make a warm spot for themselves in your heart.

Bloody dwarves.

Bloody, stupid, annoying and stubborn dwarves.

Sure I was kind of happy, if surprised, to have realized how much they meant to me. But I really wished I hadn't found that out in such a way.

I groaned loudly and banged my head against the wooden wall. What was I supposed to do now? How will I get out of this mess I found myself in once more?

Bloody dwarves.

Well, I guess now was the time to prove I could have chosen a different career, though using my knowledge in such a way was making me sick at the simple thought of it. I clenched my teeth and squeezed my eyes shut, trying to ban old memories from my thoughts.

Calming slightly I sighed before letting my mind drift through the series of events that had brought me here, alone in this dark, empty room.

* * *

It was around midday when Dwalin, Balin, the two merchants and I entered the town.

My hair and facial features were hidden by my scarf and purple hood. I loved that hood. Ori had given it to me just before we left, saying the colour was the same as their own hoods. I had quietly laughed at the fact that the brothers wore matching set of clothes but I had actually been overly happy in receiving such a present.

Right now though, I was thankful for the large hood simply because it allowed me to look around without it being too obvious. Even though this place was awful, I was curious about it. I started to glance around, not looking at the village itself but focusing on its inhabitants. I immediately noticed various things but the first thing that I could see was that these people looked exhausted. Their dirty unfriendly faces were pale, cheeks were hollow more often than not and I started to question their health.

Children were hidden away when we'd pass nearby but I still had enough time to notice some of them were unhealthily thin too. Their eyes didn't shine like children's eyes should and a strange feeling started to grow in my heart. The women didn't look much better though and even the men folk had this unhealthy complexion, really pale to the point they looked greyish. I could see the movements were sluggish and exuded exhaustion. Other than that they looked like medieval peasants, wearing dirty, soiled and sometimes even ragged clothes. Still I wondered whether clearly poor people would want to trade anything with us.

Besides they didn't really seem like a trusting and welcoming lot.

Seeing us enter their town they scurried away, hiding behind the closed doors of their houses. When we arrived in front of the biggest house that was somehow located in the centre of this village, Dwalin and Balin went up the stairs, Balin asking me first to follow them and then remain in the middle of the stairs. Turning around I realized I was in a sort of small no-man's land. The two other dwarves had placed themselves behind me down the stairs and Dwalin and Balin were a few steps higher than me.

These men really outdid themselves to protect their women folks and wards.

Dwalin knocked so hard on the wooden door that I thought for a second that he would punch a hole in the middle of it.

No one answered.

Well we couldn't blame them. Dwalin would scare me too.

After a few more unsuccessful tries I cleared my throat and Balin turned towards me.

"Has it occurred to you my kind sirs…that you might scare those people?"

Dwalin scoffed and grunted an unintelligible answer while Balin frowned.

"Balin, please, would you mind if I were to go ask some of the other people around?" I gestured towards the houses where I could see people observe us from the shadows behind their dirty windows.

"I'm not sure it's such a good idea my dear." Balin hesitated.

"What do I risk?"

"To die." Dwalin answered bluntly and I shrugged.

"I don't think so. The people seem harmless enough. Besides you told me they are peasants, surely their first reaction to a human girl wouldn't to kill her. Let me try this." I insisted.

As they seemed to hesitate I huffed loudly and simply went down the stairs, passing next to Hràr who complained about my behaviour. I ignored completely their comments and simply walked back towards the town's entrance. I could remember a woman and three children hiding in one of the houses there.

Gingerly I stepped in front of the door and knocked lightly on it, removing my hood to let the town's folk see the upper side of my face easily. I could hear a small whimper and a few gasps from the other side of the old, wooden door, and then hushed voices that somehow seemed upset.

Alright, something was definitely wrong around here.

I knocked some more and decided to let it be known without a doubt that I was a woman.

"Excuse me ma'am, my friends and I aren't looking for trouble. We're just here to talk."

I had to wait quite a bit before a shaky voice asked through the wooden panel.

"What do you want to talk about?" This undoubtedly was the woman who talked.

"Ma'am, why don't you open the door? I'm a healer, my companions are merchants who wish to set trading routes. You have nothing to be afraid of." I forced my voice to keep a steady and calm tone.

Several minutes of pleas on my part later, the stubborn woman finally opened her door. Seriously how could they be so scared about five people? Even though they weren't warriors, they still outnumbered us. It didn't make much sense to me that they would react so strongly to five strangers. It wasn't as if we were coming in with threatening looks either, well sure Dwalin wasn't really a cheerful sight, but still. My thoughts stopped though when I could finally have a good look at the woman. I didn't wish to be mean, but she looked terrible, frightened and skinny, so skinny.

"What is going on in that town?' I whispered without realizing it.

She didn't seem to hear me, or in any way she didn't answer. She looked terrified by me, which was honestly preposterous. I probably was among the most harmless people around. I had just barely managed to skin my first rabbit a few days ago for god's sake. As she looked at me suspiciously I decided to talk to her, keeping my voice as soft as possible. I felt as if I was trying to deal with a frightened animal, which wasn't very complimentary for this woman.

"Ma'am, I really don't wish to disturb you, as I said, I'm only here with my companions to discuss trade agreements with the town's master."

"The master isn't here." She replied while narrowing her eyes at me.

"When will he be back?" I asked while trying hard to remain as polite as possible.

"You are with dwarves." She spat, though once more I couldn't discern real hate in her words, though they contained plenty of fear.

The fact that she would mention it now and in such a way surprised me greatly. I felt my eyebrows rose to my hairline and my eyes widened a bit. Still, I answered calmly.

"I am."

"Dwarves…" She repeated and this time I could see she appeared disgusted. "You shouldn't stay here. Go away. There's nothing for you in this town!" She shouted those last sentences towards the dwarves who had walked closer to us.

"We would really wish to speak with the town's master first." I tried to calm her. "We believe some interesting trades could be made between our communities."

"We don't want anything to do with dwarves!" She spat while walking slightly outside her house. I took a step back while she snarled. "We don't have anything for you thieves! Leave us alone!"

Well, that was interesting. Why would she call us thieves? Had Nori come around here? Somehow I doubted it. Still, I kept this information in the corner of my mind and tried to calm her by keeping my voice kind and soft.

"We're just here to try and discuss about ways we could help each other. We only have the best interest of both our communities in mind." Well, I wasn't lying per se…was I?

That seemed to make her stop in her rant and she observed me suspiciously. Meanwhile people were slowly starting to open their doors and some of them were even stepping outside, slowly coming closer. My eyes slightly widened at the sight of few of them holding pitch forks and other similar objects. Were these guys planning to fight the dwarves with such tools? Seriously? Hadn't they seen Dwalin's battleaxes? Well, that'd be some fun fight to witness I guessed…

The next person to speak wasn't the woman next to me but a man, slightly younger than the others, he was probably my age or at least not much older.

"What do you want?" He all but growled.

"As I said, we just want to discuss with you all. Balin, could you?" I gestured to him to relay me.

"Sure, sure. Hmm, we came to review and discuss contracts, trade agreements and the likes."

"I don't believe you. You want to steal from us, you're dwarves! You're not reliable!"

At that my attention entirely focused on that second man who had just spoken while the dwarves reacted poorly at the insult. It was clear that people around had some pretty bad opinion of dwarves in general, though I had no idea where such preconceptions came from. It took us at least an hour, if not more to calm everyone down. And when I say 'us' I mean Balin and me. Dwalin, Hràr and Péri really didn't take well being insulted. They had no qualms in voicing their anger loudly, shouting strongly back at all the yells and stupid accusations send our way. By the time everyone put their weapons down and calmed a little, my throat was hoarse from all the yelling I did simply in order to be heard.

The young man, Hector he was called, appeared to be some kind of leader here while the master was out of town. Apparently he was supposed to be coming back in a short while, maybe a few days. Hector and the other men begrudgingly offered us to stay in an unoccupied house as the night was starting to fall. I sighed at the sight of all those glares exchanged between the two groups and I wondered how we would ever be able to come to any kind of agreement with them. Suddenly I felt as if I wouldn't see Thorin's Halls in quite awhile.

I was really tired that night, but I really felt I needed to talk with the dwarves, we all agreed on that at least.

I was sitting close to the small hearth, trying to catch some warmth from the pitiful fire we had been able to build. This wasn't a house, it was a shack and its previous owner had apparently died recently; it made me shiver just to think about it. There was just that one room and no furniture whatsoever. It was really not a place I'd call a house, much less a home, but at least it had a hearth and a roof. We would just have to camp inside, which was still better than outside.

Balin was the first to speak that night.

"These people are on edge. We'll have to tread carefully tomorrow."

The other nodded and I added.

"They don't trust us; they don't trust anyone outside of their town. This woman was truly frightened by you all. She really seems scared of dwarves." I thought aloud, and then I asked Balin. "Do men usually react like that? It was…quite surprising for me."

At that I could see the four of them tense visibly. Dwalin frowned deeply and grunted, which wasn't an unusual reaction for him, but I still felt that he was angry. Hràr and Péri didn't answer to me, but then again we barely spoke anyway. In the end, it was unsurprisingly Balin who answered, his small smile absent of his face.

"Well, men and dwarves have strained relations at best. There are quite a lot of weird beliefs that men have about us."

"Weird beliefs?"

"You heard some of them today. Thieves, monsters… because we leave apart from them and in the mountains, they think we are some kind of dark creatures." Balin shook his head while the three others growled.

"But you trade with them often…and without the dwarves, surely they would have less jewellery, precious stones and metals? Wouldn't they?" It seemed to me that the dwarves were doing the dirty jobs, but then again, I wasn't entirely impartial.

"That's part of the reason why they hate us." Dwalin added and I had to turn once more to Balin for more details.

"They think we hide riches in our mountains' fortresses. They think we are driven by our greed. Some of them remember the dragon and Erebor too."

At that last sentence, Balin's voice had become really low and he was staring at the fire, as if remembering the events. It hit me then, Balin probably knew Erebor. He probably witnessed the attack of the dragon. I felt bad for having reminded him of this but there wasn't anything I could do now.

"Well, I'm sure they'll see reason once we start to discuss with them."

My optimism didn't help lift the mood and all my companions remained silent for the rest of the evening. This whole mission really didn't start well.

* * *

A week and a half later my head was pounding from all the yelling I had witnessed. We had left Thorin's Halls two weeks ago and I was starting to wonder when we'd be able to go back. The town's Master had arrived two days after us, two days we had spent more or less secluded in the house. And right after the Master had arrived, discussion had started and my ears had started to ring because of all the shouts. To put it simply, the men didn't want dwarves in their towns but were really interested by the prospects of new tools. The master for his part clearly wanted shiny little items for himself but didn't want to pay the price we asked. What a disgustingly greedy man…

All in all these men simply weren't as stupid as the dwarves had thought and they wanted everything without giving anything back.

But worst than all those talks was the way the men behaved. The master never wanted to meet with us before well after lunch, forcing us to either remain in the confine of the small house or face the town's folks fear and distrust. And in the few rare times he did meet with us in the morning, he was just ignoring the dwarves completely, letting his advisors do the talking…or yelling. In the afternoon he would sometimes stand and leave the room, uncaring of how rude he was being and clearly perversely happy to anger the dwarves.

It sickened me.

The dwarves were impressive though. They managed to remain patient and didn't outright behead the master. Dwalin would rant and growl in our house, just like Hràr and Péri would, while Balin would mumble under his breath. They were all deeply offended and I couldn't find any fault in that. Even I was starting to be royally annoyed by the master's behaviour.

I was proud to see the dwarves trying hard to rein on their anger. Even though they did yell and shout loudly during the 'discussions' they were still remaining rather polite. They countered each time the men were complaining about the prices we asked, saying that they wouldn't sell their products for anything less than their actual values. I could only agree with them on that, the men wanted to buy our items for half the price we asked at most. And obviously no agreement could be reached as long as they refused to at least offer lodging to passing dwarves, which greatly annoyed Balin who had actually come mostly for this part of the agreement. The men simply didn't even want to hear anything about this.

As he had told me, we didn't really come all the way down here just to sell a few pitch forks and hammers. The dwarves wanted free access to this town; it would really help the caravans going south to have a safe place to stop for a night.

Obviously with all the shouts taking part on the simple topic of tools' prices, the other points had barely been discussed at all. It was just sterile arguments and they were all grating on my nerves.

Well it had to be admitted though, that it was quite impressive to see these men were just as stubborn as the dwarves on certain matters.

I sighed.

Other issues bothered our little group too. Mostly the fact that the men refused to provide, even sell, food to us while our provisions were diminishing quickly. We barely had enough for one more meal, maybe two if the dwarves rationed themselves and the men had shouted bloody murder the one and only time Dwalin had thought about going on a short hunting trip in the nearby forest.

It was past ridiculous.

At first Balin, and even the three others, had thought that my being a woman and a healer would help us in our talks. They thoughts the men would naturally trust me more. Well they didn't. I couldn't approach the town's people who feared all of us really. Besides being a woman made it so that no one really listened to me when I was trying to calm everyone down. Only Balin, and to a certain extent that young man, Hector, would from time to time listen to my words. But Hector couldn't take much part in the discussions; the master was really the only one who could say anything and from what I could see, he didn't appreciate Hector much. The young man was only allowed in our talks because he was trusted by the people, not the master.

The town master was an old and fat man. One look at him had made my skin crawl at first; his grey hair were greasy, his eyes yellowy, he had this awful habit to spit on the floor and all in all looked like an horrible oversized and deformed boar. He was greedy to an unimaginable point too and wanted us to respect him just because he was the town master. That didn't really please my companions who had taken to despise him almost immediately.

And this obviously didn't help the negotiations.

At some point though I did ask Balin why we just didn't leave. Of course I knew we needed to find an agreement with the master, but surely the other dwarves would start to worry. What would we do if a group of them came barrelling into town, weapons drawn and shouting in Khuzdul?

Balin had laughed and the other snorted. Apparently I was being too paranoid. Nothing would happen, Balin repeated. And if dwarves did come, then anyway what problem could it cause?

Well I wasn't convinced with such arguments and I told Balin so.

Men around were suspicious of us already and had no trust whatsoever in dwarves. Surely the fact a group of them invaded their territory wouldn't be appreciated. And who knew how scared men would react? After all, weren't actions derived from fear among the most unpredictable ones?

But obviously no one listened to me and I was left worrying on my own, cursing at their stubbornness and their lack of common sense.

And here I was, almost two weeks had passed since we entered this town, soon it'd be three weeks since we left Thorin's Halls and I was simply certain that Dori, Nori and Ori would be really annoyed and worried by now. Maybe they would actually chain me to keep me in their care when I'd go back…

Nah…they wouldn't dare…would they?

Thinking about him made me feel slightly better so I let my mind drift away from my problems. It wouldn't hurt to wait a bit any way; the night was still too young for me to act safely. I absentmindedly took a small piece of bread from the nearby table, munching on it without appetite. It was tasteless but it did remind me of a particularly fun time I had with Dori, back in Thorin's Halls.

* * *

It was early in the afternoon when I entered the kitchen. Nori was still rather weak after having been hurt and I consistently insisted that he rested in his room. I had left him alone so that he could sleep, and he had agreed to do so grumpily. Even he had to admit that he was still easily tired, though for the past few days he had been able to stand and walk to the kitchen once or twice a day.

When I pushed the door I saw Dori come in from the other side.

"Hello Amelia. How is Nori?"

I smiled at him. Even though he had seen Nori just a few hours ago, Dori couldn't help but worry and endlessly asked me how his little brother was doing.

"He's fine. Grumpy but fine. He's asleep now." I answered after adding under my breath. "Hopefully he is at least."

"Good, good." Dori was holding several packages and put them all down on the table while I came closer, curious about their contents.

"What's in it?" I asked while poking at several packages.

"Food." Dori smiled at me. "Well, mostly. I've been down to the men's town and I brought back some freshly hunted meat. Some furs and leather too. And flour."

"Flour?"

"Aye, I wanted to bake some bread today." Dori said while unpacking the items.

"You know how to make bread?" I asked, sincerely surprised.

Dori laughed heartily and patted my shoulder before answering.

"Of course, almost everyone knows how! But our family's recipe is very good and I know Nori is fond of it."

He needed not say more. Sweet and caring Dori wanted to support and help his little brother in any way he could. It was such a simple and sweet gesture. I couldn't help but beam at my guardian, oddly wondering how I could have been so lucky to end up in his and his brothers' care. I almost bounced on the spot while I asked, feeling like I was a small child once more.

"Please, oh please can you teach me how to do it?"

Dori smiled widely at me and nodded, apparently happy to share his knowledge in baking bread with me. I felt strangely proud that he would allow me to know their family's secret bread recipe too.

Baking with Dori was amazing. He would laugh of my mistake and was extremely patient. We spent the whole afternoon together, and by the end of it, when Ori came back and Nori woke up, both Dori and myself were covered in flour. The kitchen wasn't faring much better and all in all the cleaning would take ages. But the four of us didn't care because the bread tasted amazingly sweet and smooth. Dori smiled at me fondly, smiling. We had had a great time together. Ori had been pleasantly surprised by the warm bread waiting for him and the smell had awoken Nori.

At that time I couldn't care less about the cleaning I'd have to do later. Nori was smiling happily as he took large bites of the warm and freshly baked bread. Just seeing him like this warmed my heart. Yes, this simple sight was worth all the troubles and much more.

* * *

I sighed, coming back to the present. I glanced around, disheartened at the sight of the empty and silent room. Just the day before Balin, Dwalin, Hràr and Péri were still here with me. Three weeks ago we had left Thorin's Halls, hoping to be back in just about a week time. Now here I was, alone and scheming in the night. Looking again at the sky I wondered if I should wait some more or not before acting. Grumpily I stood up and stretched, thinking about the events that had finally allowed me to gain some fragile trust from the peasants before everything went downhill.

* * *

It was several days ago, in the morning I decided not to join the men in their discussion, or rather dispute. I silently observed the life in the village. It was both interesting and weird to see how these people lived. They were peasants, farmers and hunters. Their life here seemed quite hard and they lacked the simplest things. I had been surprised for example not to spot any well or river around.

It was Balin who had explained that this area was usually quite rainy, and the soil was clayish, in such circumstances digging a well would be more dangerous and pointless than really useful. Thus the people around collected rain water in small cisterns near their houses. I had counted six of those water tanks and had been astounded to hear that they were sufficient for the men's needs.

That morning, no one talked with me when I walked around in the village curious to see how the people actually lived, but I could tell they were observing me. I was bored out of my mind. It was past midday and I was sitting on the floor after having finished my stroll around town, leaning my back against our house's wall, when I heard shouts that didn't come from the place where the men were 'talking'. I frowned and jumped to my feet. Following the screams to one barn at the outskirts of town, I found a group of people kneeling around a young boy.

"Move!" I snapped to the men who were crowding him.

I probably shocked them enough with my tone because they moved out of my way, eyes wide. I quickly kneeled near the boy. His eyes were closed and blood was already pooling behind his head. I frowned and try to assert cautiously whether he had an injury on his neck or not. Then I gingerly palpated his scalp while calling to the people around.

"What happened?"

None of them answered.

"What are you doing to my son?" A woman screeched while coming closer and I recognized her as the first person who had dared open her door almost two weeks ago.

"I told you, I'm a healer." I said as calmly as possible. "So someone better answer my questions. And it'd be a good idea to go call one of my companions so that he can bring me my bag." The injury was bleeding profusely but it didn't surprise me as it was on the back of its head.

"You're one of them, you'll kill my son!"

I could hear some other people around starting to mumble and I really didn't think it would help this child if everyone argued about stupid prejudices concerning dwarves. I took a deep breath and looked behind my shoulder where the mother was standing, obviously hesitating between yanking me away from her child and not touching me.

"Oh, bloody hell woman. If you want me to let the boy die continue like this." I snapped before talking in a calmer voice. "Now, if you want me to heal him, go explain what happened to my companion called Balin."

I hadn't named Balin for nothing. My guardian didn't look as dangerous or fierce as the others, though I was certain this look was deceptive. At my tone, the mother seemed to hesitate only for a short while before rushing back in town. The people around were eyeing me suspiciously but a few of them seemed slightly hopeful. I asked once more what had happened and finally got my answer when a young boy spoke.

"We were playing and he stumbled. He didn't move after he fell."

That wasn't really helpful.

"Alright. I need to have a closer look at his wound. Can you find two pieces of wood, approximately this size..." I gestured to the boy's neck. "…and some linen too."

I was happy to see them obey at once this time and two children scurried away looking for what I wanted. One of the most suspicious men groaned.

"Why do you want pieces of wood?"

I barely stopped myself before I rolled my eyes. What did he expect me to do with them? Strangle the boy?

"To make sure his neck doesn't move when I'll turn him to check the back of his head. I don't think he hurts it, but I don't want to take any risk for now." I answered matter-of-factly.

"What if did hurt his neck? He'll heal just fine." A second man snarled and this time I almost snorted.

"Sure." I replied coolly. "And if he did hurt it and you make him move in a bad way, you might just snap it completely killing him at the same time. Now, if you break it and he still manages to survive just fine, then he would forever remain unable to move. So what do you think? Shall we wait? Hmm?"

I quirked an eyebrow at the man who opened his mouth and closed it several times in a row.

"That's what I thought. Now move away all of you. No need to crowd the poor child."

Approximately at that time Balin arrived, unsurprisingly followed by all the other dwarves. I couldn't help but smirk at the sight. I had the feeling that most dwarves were really big softies hiding under tons of gruffness and grumpiness and they didn't like the thought of a child hurting; it didn't matter that it was a human child.

I quickly explained Balin what had happened and what I needed. Balin, being a dwarf, had expertly managed to craft a sort of neck brace. I was impressed he was able to improvise that so quickly and with so little instructions as to what I wanted. Dwarves were actually quite handy to know. Then with his help, I refused anyone else's, I quickly bandaged the boy's head and finished to check his neck.

The boy had been fairly lucky really; he'd only have a bump, a small scar on the scalp and a massive headache. He regained consciousness a bit later and, though he seemed a bit lost, he didn't seem to suffer from any trauma.

I too had been incredibly lucky to have witnessed this event and helped heal the boy. As soon as he was back on his feet, which is the following day, the people in town looked at me gratefully.

One day after the events the town's people shared with us what little provisions they had left.

Two more days later the discussions were finally starting to go somewhere and the level of shouting had greatly diminished. The master was still as rude as ever, but he begrudgingly agreed that we might be useful sometimes. Among his advisors was the young boy's father; obviously it helped. I started to hope we'll soon leave this place and go back to Thorin's Halls.

I started to daydream about the homecoming party I was certain would occur when I'll be back home.

A giddy feeling grew in my chest when I thought about Thorin's Halls as my home. It felt so right too. I couldn't help a small smile to tug on my lips.

I wondered whether Ori had finished the book or whether he had waited for me. I missed our peaceful time together in the evenings. I really wanted to be back in our home; Dori and Nori would be close by, smoking or drinking some ale while Ori would softly read me stories. Or maybe I'll tell them what happened here, how awkward it was at first and how much I got used to Dwalin's, Hràr's and Péri's grunts. It was a language on its own, really.

I couldn't wait to see their faces when I'll tell them that the only food the people had shared with us consisted of vegetables and cheese. Dwalin's face had been memorable.

I chuckled just thinking about it. Dwalin had looked so lost, so utterly confounded by his plate of cabbage. I swear he even looked around his plate, wondering aloud where we had put the meat. Balin had simply shaken his head from side to side in disbelief.

"Where's the meat, lass? Didn't you cook the meat?" He had asked me gruffly.

"There was no meat to cook Dwalin." I tried to smile to sooth him.

"No meat? No meat?! What kind of habit is that, to eat green stuffs without meat?!" He groaned and complained.

"Dwalin, you should already be happy that I'm not cooking my favourite recipes." At that they had all looked at me questioningly.

"Why is that lass?" Balin had finally asked.

"Ask Ori about it." I replied with a toothy grin.

At the time I thought that everything would be alright and that we'll soon be on our way back to the Halls. I had good hopes then that the discussions would come to an end soon, probably in a day or two.

As I was alone that evening, the dwarves already sleeping in the far corner of the room, I started at the dying fire in the hearth and thought about how lucky we had been. Sure we had remained here for far longer than we expected, but my fears had been unfounded; no dwarves had barrelled into town with weapons in hands. Surely nothing could go bad now that we finally started to talk about a possible agreement with the men.

After I had 'saved' a town's boy, I had received a separate status than my companions. Apparently I was now someone to be trusted. It mostly meant that whenever I told everyone to shut up during the arguments, they would. More or less. Alright the dwarves barely cared and the men really stopped talking for just a few minutes but still, compared to their endless shouts it was a feat to achieve that level of peacefulness.

Well at least they were all still talking and I was trying my best to make everyone compromise. I had ended at the position of mediator and I truly had no idea how or why. Even the disgusting master was listening to me from time to time.

And after another full day of yell, my patience finally snapped.

"Seriously all of you stop!" I ended up screeching.

I had healed the boy four days ago, we had left Thorin's Halls three weeks ago and my head was pounding due to all the yells. My nerves simply couldn't take anymore fruitless arguments.

I sighed when I heard all the men around slowly stopping their talks. I had closed my eyes, and was massaging my temples with my fingers, trying to ease the pain in my head. When I finally decided to look up, I saw all their eyes on me. Some looked sheepish, some looked concerned and the others were just clearly surprised by my little outburst.

"Don't tell me you all haven't realized yet that this..." I gestured towards all of us. "Is not going anywhere… Besides you all enjoy listening to your own voices way too much."

"Hem, lady…" One of the men tried to interrupt me.

"No. Don't say anything. Starting from now, you all listen!" I hissed.

"Listen Missy…" The master started, pointing a finger at me, but I ignored him.

"Lass…"

"No Balin! I'm happy I followed you here but I certainly didn't come along to witness this circus show. So from now on, you all shut it and I'm the one talking."

To say they were flabbergasted would be quite right, though not entirely because I could see Dwalin appraising me with an approving glint in his eyes and Balin was clearly proud. Hràr was apparently finding something highly amusing which shocked me, for he usually didn't seem to appreciate anything. When I said dwarves were weird, I meant it. Talk back at them, force them somehow to shut up and they would believe you to be wonderful. Still, I didn't ponder on those thoughts, I was way too tired for these sorts of pointless banter and my outburst was clearly fuelled by my exasperation at their behaviours.

"So... To recapitulate and no I don't need help remembering what everyone in this room repeated endlessly for the past, what? I think it's almost been two weeks now. Anyway. The main issue here is that the dwarves can and are willing to sell high quality products to you all. Those items would be far better than any you own and would probably last longer too. Right?"

Everyone nodded, the dwarves eagerly while sending glares to the men who nodded too if less enthusiastically. The master especially looked as if he had been forced to eat a lemon. I continued my speech unperturbed though.

"The fact that you refuse to pay for the price asked I gather is understandable." At that, the dwarves frowned while the men looked smug. "But your propositions are simply ridiculous. Where it men selling you such fine quality items, you'd pay the price asked without questions. If you want the tools, pay for it, otherwise let's move on."

I saw the dwarves starting to look smug now but I didn't wait to hear the town's men complaints.

"Now. You say, you can't pay. Alright but what services then can you provide in exchange? If the men cannot pay then you could do something for us for free. Balin, if the men assured us we could be safely received here and provided with free lodging and food each time a dwarf from Thorin's Halls would stop by, would that be a fair compromise for the payment of some tools?"

The white bearded dwarf seemed to ponder on this option before glancing at the others and finally nodding.

"Details should be discussed but that could be an amenable solution. However it wouldn't be the same quantities of tools."

"Alright. What about you? Would such a solution be agreeable to you too?"

The men clearly weren't happy about it and the master simply glared at me. They would probably discuss this idea more in depth later on when we wouldn't hear them. Still they couldn't protest too loudly because it was the first time the dwarves didn't bluntly refuse.

"It might be an amenable option to us too."

Seriously what was so complicated about agreeing with that? Why, oh why had they spent weeks without listening to each other? Well, if I were honest I would say it was mostly the master's fault. He just didn't want to agree with anything the dwarves would say and had a clear antagonistic approach when he came in the room. But my new found friendly status had forced his hand. He had no choice but to listen to me just like his men did. Had I thought about it four days ago, I would have put a stop to those stupid banters earlier.

I slowly breathed out. Hopefully things would move on a bit more quickly from now on. No one felt like discussing it directly though and apparently everyone wanted to think separately about it.

The men all stood up and left the room, leaving me alone with the dwarves. I suddenly lost all the boldness and wit I had displayed a few minutes earlier. I swallowed thickly and waited for the Guillotine to fall on my neck, or Dwalin's axe in that instance.

Dwalin stood up, followed by the two merchants and finally Balin. While Dwalin and Hràr, went past me, they grunted, which made me raise one eyebrow; this sounded like a thankful grunt, yes there seemed to be thankful grunts in their… vocabulary. Péri winked at me and smirked before he followed the other two outside. I was puzzled by their actions until Balin patted my back reassuringly.

"You did well lass. I'm proud of my ward."

I blushed and smiled softly at him. It was weird how incredibly happy those few words had made me.

A giddy sensation made my skin prickle and I couldn't resist hugging Balin. He chuckled softly and patted my back some more.

Later that night I pondered on this. In my world I had failed lamely and disappointed my family. Here it appeared I was odd, incomprehensible sometimes and probably perceived as demented because of my quirks and my love of fruits and vegetables, but still. Balin was proud of me. Balin, one of my guardians, the King's counsellor and friend, was proud of me.

That thought made me feel incredibly happy.

The following day went on surprisingly smoothly. The master and his men were finally conceding some points and the dwarves had finally understood that diplomatic solutions required for them to at least think about making some compromises.

I would have thought they knew that already, what with all the contracts they already have. But apparently these men were really more hostile than usual, their prejudices about dwarves stronger than in other towns, thus putting the dwarves on edge. Their natural answer to hostility being hostility, it wasn't a mystery really that the talks so far had so little results.

But at the moment I truly couldn't care less about it all.

Nope, my mind was in Thorin's Halls. Oh, I could already see myself back home with Dori, Nori and Ori.

I just couldn't wait.

And then obviously something happened. My life was a joke. Problems seemed to pop out of nowhere every time things started to look good for me.

This time the problem popped out in the form of a group of grumpy, snarling dwarves.

Seeing Bofur, Bifur and some others I didn't know being brought in the centre of the village forcibly was not a sight I relish seeing again. Not at all. Not ever. They were all complaining, shouting already at the men who were using pitch forks, axes and other tools to force them to walk.

Pitch forks! I didn't know whether to laugh or cry at that sight.

I knew something bad was bound to happen. We couldn't be almost two weeks late and not expect the dwarves still in Thorin's Halls to react. We should have sent a message, anything to let them know we were fine. I had been right, what a surprise…maybe irony was not supposed to be used at that moment, but well, who cared anyway?

Looking at the dwarves being brought in front of us, it was easy to see they were a sort of rescue party. Though how they had been caught was a mystery to me.

"Let us go immediately!" One of the dwarves shouted.

"What's the meaning of this?!" Dwalin yelled in his deep and gruff voice.

"What's the meaning of this? You dare ask us that question dwarf?" The man spat, his voice full of hatred and mistrust. "You're the ones who hid in the woods. They were preparing to attack us. Look at all their weapons."

At that one of the other men threw swords, axes, mattocks and hammers on the ground. They clanked loudly and I guessed that the dwarves had been camping in the woods, planning on going in town either that night or tomorrow morning. While I thought about this, Bofur tried to sooth the men.

"We didn't hide in the…"

"You were planning to attack us! Why would you carry so many weapons? Why would you camp not a mile away from town?"

"Dwarves always carry weapons when they travel, like everyone else does." I tried to calm everyone to no avail.

"They were planning to attack us!" A woman stupidly screeched.

"What?! You're the ones who attacked them first!" Dwalin bellowed, though his words probably had no effects on the men.

"So those talks were just a plan to gain time?"

This was seriously becoming ridiculous. Why would these men react so strongly about that? I could understand they'd be upset but still, it wasn't necessary to shout bloody murder.

"They're dwarves! They only think about themselves and they'll steal all we have before leaving!"

"They'll murder us and kidnap our children to work in their mines!"

Well apparently I was wrong. Were those stupid ideas actual rumours and prejudices about dwarves? I hadn't heard them yet and really hoped never to hear something so preposterous ever again.

All the dwarves were now shouting as loudly as the crowd was and I could already see they were about to snap and attack everyone in sight. I couldn't really blame them; the insults sent their way were pretty ridiculous and downright awful. I reacted quickly though, grabbing Balin's forearm while he was shouting at some woman that no, dwarves didn't enslave humans in their mines.

"Balin!" I breathed out. "We need to calm down everyone. Fighting them will not solve anything!"

Thankfully the old dwarf nodded his agreement and quickly shouted a word in Khuzdul that no one around understood, except for the dwarves of course. The men though were still freaking out.

"Let's lock them up in the cellars!"

"Yes! They're dangerous!" "We can't trust them!" "They're beasts!" "They're monsters!"

My eyes were wide with disbelief and fear. I saw the dwarves starting to struggle when Balin ordered them something else in Khuzdul which I could only guess was something like 'don't resist lads.' I did try to intervene though.

"Wait. There's no need for that." I should have remained quiet because my intervention just brought things to a head.

"Look at her! She's obviously human, she's been kidnapped too!" "We need to save her." "Poor girl forced to work for them!"

I didn't like being pitied. And I especially hated being pitied when there truly was no reason for such sentiments. The dwarves were astounded. I was so flabbergasted that I lost my voice, staring at them all with my mouth hanging open.

In a matter of ten, maybe fifteen minutes, all the dwarves had been gathered and lead like cattle into the master's house. Meanwhile I was being perceived as a poor, helpless victim. Awesome…

* * *

And now here I was, three weeks after peacefully starting a harmless journey, sitting next to the windowsill at night, contemplating what to do next. To be truthful I already had a plan but I hated it and to say I was hesitating would be an understatement.

I had spent the whole afternoon and evening trying to rationalize with the town's men but they had put it in their head that I was some victims that suffered some Stockholm Syndrome. Obviously they didn't put it in such terms but well the meaning was the same. Anyway the problem remained. I was still in the dingy house where I had previously stayed with the dwarves, and they were all chained, or at least bound, in a cellar that was in the town's master's house.

From what I had understood, there even were various men guarding the prisoners. I had no hope of freeing them using force, not that I had planned on using what little muscles I had. No, I would have to use my wit.

So there I sat at night, a healer planning to do something terrible, a healer with only one idea left to free her friends. I closed my eyes.

I could only hope my plan would work smoothly…

* * *

**A/N: I really wanted to thank Mary who faithfully reviews my chapters :) Even though I can't PM you, I want to tell you how happy I am each time I read one of your review! so many thanks**

**Thanks as well to everyone who reads/reviews/follows or adds this story in his/her favorites. It's really nice of you all to follow this little monster of a story.**

**I really hope this chapter wasn't too terrible to read. I had trouble editing it and I'm not sure all the time skips were easy enough to follow. I'm a bit late for the update too because I wanted to add some light scenes (the one with Dori, and Dwalin eating) **

**I do hope the men's reactions isn't to unbelievable but I think that racism in ME could potentially be strong, especially against dwarves who are very secretive and suspicious of others. **

**I'm still struggling with the rewriting of the next chapters, so I'm really sorry if the updates slowed down. **

**Next update will hopefully be Monday, latest Tuesday (French time, sorry for those of you who always end up with the chapter one day later...)**


	17. A Healer's Negotiation

**Everything belongs to JRR Tolkien, except for my OC and the plot**

* * *

The dwarves had been locked up a several hours ago. The night was now pitch black and I had finally decided to leave the relative safety of the little house I was residing in. At the moment, all I could think about was how I wished the three brothers were here. I could easily picture Dori, standing close by, maybe even just next to me. He would try his best to protect me, to avoid me being hurt. Ori for his part would try to support me in any way he could.

And Nori…

Nori would be furious. He wouldn't want me to do anything besides run away to get help. He wouldn't want me to get hurt in any way.

I felt a shiver run down my spine while a single tear rolled on my cheek. How I wished Nori was here. He'd find a way to sneak in and save everyone; he was a thief after all, wasn't he? I didn't know whether he was a good one, but surely he would be able to find a better plan than mine.

Yes, I wished he was here. I wanted him to hold me. I wanted him to give me strength.

But I was alone while I silently made my way to the town's entrance, walking close to walls and crouching at the sight of windows or at any suspicious noise. At some point I was reminded of all those action and spy movies I had watched in my previous world, it seemed so long ago. I didn't ponder on such thoughts for long; I had to focus on my plan. My target was an old tree with mistletoe infesting it.

To be honest I didn't trust the men around, and I was desperate. Their weird beliefs about dwarves could potentially lead them to ridiculous conclusions, the kind of which I didn't want to think about. Still I didn't believe the men would keep the dwarves locked forever and I doubted we'd be free to go as if nothing had happened. So what choices did these men have? When I had thought about this earlier I had realized that I might not have much time to act and that I really should do something to help my friends.

In the end it was up to me to come up with a plan to free all those stubborn dwarves from those stupid and ignorant men.

Coming up with this solution hadn't been easy. And it certainly was far from an ideal plan.

I had been trying to speak in favour of the dwarves, inefficiently obviously seeing as they were still captives, when I had seen the tree. At first I had no idea what to do, while I tried to speak with the master when he was walking out of town. Then I had seen the tree and had remembered rather suddenly how my dog had been killed when I was but a child. He had died because he had eaten mistletoe that had fallen from a tree in our garden. The old tree of this town was entirely riddled with mistletoe, so it would be easy enough to climb and gather leaves and fruits. I believed it was an apple tree but I really wasn't good at recognizing tree varieties so I couldn't be sure. In any cases, I didn't care because my purpose for being here was not to find out what kind of tree that was.

I had finally arrived under the bare branches and I looked up, observing what I had come here to gather. With the quantity of mistletoe in that tree, I'll be able to collect quite a lot of leaves and berries without it being too easily noticeable by the people in town. Anyway they probably didn't really keep tabs on how much parasites infested their trees. Right? I seriously hoped so in any case.

Simply looking at the tree I felt the guilt in my chest reach new heights.

How could I even contemplate doing that?

How could I believe myself to be a healer if I intentionally planned to poison people?

Painful memories of my father and then of insults and newspaper articles were brought at the forefront of my mind. I shook my head quickly, now wasn't an appropriate time to think about this. I focused on my task once more, my mind still messed up with too many thoughts.

Of course I didn't intend to kill any of them but that didn't mean there wasn't any risk. It was highly possible that one of the children, even maybe an adult, would have a bad reaction to the plant's toxin and would die. What then? What should I do? Should I go on with that insane plan?

I bit my lower lip, the real question somehow was should I take the risk to wait and see what'll happen next? From what I knew of dwarves, they were not only extremely stubborn, but they were proud to an impossible extent and seemed to solve problems by wielding axes and hammers. Not really a good option here in my humble opinion.

Still, was I ready to throw all my beliefs and promises away just to save their asses…well and probably some of the peasants' lives too? I didn't care much per se about the villagers, but we came here to peacefully find agreements, not to let an angry Dwalin loose on the town's men.

I hated this plan. I really did.

If I took one step forward I'd probably have no right to call myself a healer. Not anymore. Simply because this step would in all probability force me to do things I abhorred and that were in contradiction with what a healer should do. I would never see myself in the same light either. It would just highlight how terrible a person I could easily become. How egoistical I could be, because if I were honest with myself, I'd admit I was doing it as much as I was doing it for the dwarves.

I didn't want to lose them. I didn't want to be alone here. I didn't want them to be hurt either.

Swearing under my breath I took that step and extended my arms to grab the closest branch. I heaved myself up with quite some difficulties. I probably should exercise more to keep fit, I thought with a grimace as my muscles protested.

Climbing the tree once I was up in its branches wasn't so difficult anymore. I found a spot where I didn't risk falling down if I let go of the tree bark, slowly picking up Nori's dagger from its sheath. Looking at it for a second I wondered whether Nori would have guessed I'd use it for pruning a tree. Little by little I cut and collected bits and pieces of mistletoes, being cautious not to take too much of it in the same places. I needed the people of town to keep trusting me and a visible amount of missing mistletoe might make them suspicious.

I quickly gathered a lot of leaves and berries in the empty leather bag I had with me.

I stayed in this damn tree for quite awhile and soon I started to grow anxious. What if someone saw me? What will I do? What will I say?

I bit my lip; I needed to focus, not to worry about things that hadn't happened yet and might never happen.

"Damn dwarves" I muttered to myself when I finally lowered myself and finally jumped back on the ground. I gathered quickly all the leaves, twigs and berries that had fallen on the floor that I could see in the darkness and put them in my emptied bag with the rest of my collect. Then I rushed back to the little house I lived in. Caution was still high on my list of priorities though, so I didn't simply dash back in even though I wanted nothing more than just do that.

I felt like some sort of spy and I guess I kind of was. Well more of an assassin than a spy actually. I grimaced some more. These dwarves would owe me a huge debt; I hoped they'd realized it. What I was planning to do for their sake was just completely against every moral and personal beliefs I ever had. Maybe I should be worried of what kind of person I was becoming, planning on hurting people to save those dear to me.

I didn't like that. I really didn't.

Once I was back in the safety of the small house, I quickly took some wooden bowl the peasants had given us to use it as a mortar. I looked around the stuffs they had lent us and grabbed another tool that would do as a sort of pestle. No way was I going to put poison on my medicinal equipments.

Using the improvised pestle and mortar I slowly crushed part of the fruits and leaves into a strange mixture. I eyed it sceptically, removing all parts that would potentially be spotted easily and I transferred it into a second bowl then I repeated the same movements until that second bowl was reasonably full.

I took a deep breath then and grabbed that bowl full of juices and crushed leaves with shaky hands before standing up, taking three empty water skins with me and going outside once more.

I slowly walked to the closest cistern and remained motionless for a while. I finally put the bowl down and filled my water skins mechanically. Then I stood and stared at the water. I took a shaky breath and swallowed thickly. There wasn't that much water in it, it was maybe half full, and this time I had no idea of what proportions to use.

There was no use in hesitating now, I thought while I jerkily poured the content of the bowl into the cistern. I used a long stick found on the floor and the bowl too to stir the water, aiming to dilute the poison in it as homogeneously as possible. There were already twigs and leaves floating so the added mixture wouldn't be spotted easily.

I bit my lip and felt my hand tremble but I fought against myself. Now wasn't the time to be scared or weak. It would be counterproductive to feel guilty and regret my actions. Now I just had to wait and repeat this action for as long as it will take for the people to react to the toxin contained in mistletoe. I'll come back and pour some more mixture in that water every damn night until they'd fall sick.

I felt like throwing up at those thoughts.

I hated myself.

How I wished Dori, Nori and Ori were here to try and reason with me.

How I hoped they wouldn't be as repulsed of me as I currently felt.

There was no point in dwelling on it now. I couldn't take back my actions and I didn't want to anyway. Actually that was why I loathed myself so much right now; I was doing something distasteful and I knew I would do it hundred times over if it meant my plan would work and my friends would be free.

Yes.

I was a monster.

No need to cry over it.

That night I couldn't sleep.

* * *

The following day I still tried to negotiate for my friends' liberation, but once again I only received condescending gazes. These people really believed me to be a victim and it made my blood boil in my veins. Who did they think they were, looking at me like this, judging me and my friends? I would most likely be dead if it weren't for the dwarves. The men had done nothing but harm me, scare me or disgust me since I set foot in this world. Dwarves had protected me, welcomed me with open arms, they helped me in so many ways... My home was in their Halls. I wouldn't let them rot in this bloody town and I couldn't help but glare at every human who looked at me sadly.

I hated the way they stared at me. I hated them.

Finally I ended up asking if I could at least see my imprisoned friends. Obviously the men didn't like the idea of me going to the cellar to speak with the evil dwarves that were detained. The town's master vehemently protested and I had to promise not to talk with them to eventually be allowed to see them. I was to be accompanied by two men too.

Did they actually believe little old me would free all the dwarves and kill the men guarding them using blunt force?

Seriously?

Well in any case it was late afternoon when I ended up facing a door at the end of a corridor in the town's master house. There were several men in the corridors as well as the master who was hiding somewhere in that house. The door opened on dark stairs going down and I felt a shiver crept up my spine. They had thrown my friends in a dark cave. I clenched my jaw but didn't even try to say something about these awful conditions.

I gingerly walked down the stairs behind one of the two men who was holding a torch. The light was really dim and I was glad to finally walk down the last step. I looked up from the floor and couldn't help but gasp at the sight.

"Oy, dwarves. Look up." The man holding the torch snarled before kicking strongly Bofur's legs.

Angry wasn't close to cover what I felt right now.

My friends and companions were tied with thick ropes, their hands behind their back and gagged with cloths, lying on the floor in the complete dark, the only light being that of the torch the men had just brought with them. And with that light I could easily see that the men had no qualms in detaining my friends in horrible conditions. I clenched my fists, feeling my nails almost piercing my skin.

"Have they been fed?" I asked, my voice shaking with anger.

The man behind me pushed my shoulder strongly enough to make me stumble a bit. The dwarves reacted by bouncing and groaning, fighting vigorously against the ropes. Dwalin managed to look deadly even though he really wasn't in any position to do anything much. Balin's glare was positively scary and both Bofur and Bifur struggled violently against the ropes hindering their moves. Even Hràr, Péri and the others looked as if they wanted to simply beat to death the men who had rudely shoved me.

"We said you could see them, but don't talk." The man grunted at me.

I glared at him. The guilt and regret I was feeling because of my plan diminished slightly at the knowledge of how they were mistreating my friends. I nodded to the man and took a step towards the dwarves. The second man's hand on my shoulder prevented me to walk any further in the cold room.

At least now all the dwarves were looking at me and the men were in my back. I bit my lip while I thought of what I could do next. I had to let the dwarves know somehow that they shouldn't try anything violent. I had to let them know they had to be patient. But I still had no idea how to do that while those two monkeys were eyeing my every move.

What could I do or say?

The only idea I had was pathetic but I didn't have much choice and could only hope it'd work. Besides, it had been inspired by those two stupid peasants who were still behind me. I glanced at Balin who frowned deeply and observed me, clearly knowing I was up to something.

Preparing myself for the violent shove that I hoped would come I spoke, obviously at my friends.

"Are you all al…"

I couldn't finish my sentence as the predictable man brutally pushed my shoulder once more with a loud 'Oy!' and this time I didn't try to stop my stumble. On the contrary I let myself fall ungracefully as close as possible to the dwarves who were groaning and snarling violently. All of them were furious except for Balin who was still observing me. I managed to address him a small smile before I whispered lowly.

"Be patient. Trust me."

The old dwarf's eyes widened slightly and he gave me a sharp, almost indiscernible nod before I felt two larges hands grab me by the back of my tunic. I was violently yanked back, away from the protesting dwarves, and I didn't try and stop a yelp from escaping my lips. How I hoped these two brainless brutes would be among the poisoned ones. It would really make me happy to see them sick.

My anger clouded my brain for a second but I knew that soon those very thoughts would fuel my guilt. No healer should ever think anything like that.

I stumbled once more when they heaved me up and could hear the dwarves muffled protests at how I was being treated. Their growls were quite impressive I should say.

"You saw them enough. Up you go."

The man who held the torch pushed me back towards the stairs and I had no choice but to leave when the second one pushed me some more. In my back I could hear the man who was still down speak to the dwarves.

"You monsters. You enslaved the poor girl and she keeps whining for you all!"

I heard a few thuds and a grunt. My fists clenched for I knew, I just knew, the bastard had kicked one of the dwarves again. What was it with the men here? Why did they treat prisoners so poorly? It was revolting. Frowning deeply I could only admit that seeing that only added to my fears; these men were really dangerous and I really couldn't trust their reactions toward the dwarves. It only reassured me that I had been right to take actions, even though those actions were simply wrong and despicable.

At the top of the stairs I quickly asked in a cold voice.

"Have they been fed?"

"That's none of your business." The man growled.

"It's my damn business! If any of them die down there, let me tell you, you'll regret it! You'll regret it dearly!" I snapped back.

"Are you trying to threaten us girl?' He snarled.

"Threaten? That's not a threat. I'm in no position to utter threats." My tone was sweet and misled the man to believe I was scared of him.

"That's what I thought." He said smugly.

"It's no threat. It's simple logic. Let but one of them die or suffer injuries and all the dwarves from the Blue Mountains will fall on you. They will tear this place down and burn it to the ground."

I had never used such a sharp, icy voice. My eyes met his, steely while I schooled my face into a blank mask. The man didn't like it and he violently pushed me against the wall that I hit loudly with my back. My brain was so clouded by anger at this moment that I didn't even feel any pain.

The noise alerted others who came and ultimately they argued against each others before escorting me back to the little house. I had no illusions; this house was my prison. The men didn't lock it but at least half of the town eyed me suspiciously, waiting for me to attack them while the other half pitied me. I heard the door close behind me. I was alone once more.

At that moment I wasn't feeling so bad anymore about my little poisoning of the town's water. They didn't deserve my guilt, though I knew it wouldn't stop me from feeling repelled by my actions once the anger cooled down. At that instant though, I didn't care at all. I would do everything in my power to free my friends and these men would willingly cut the ropes that bound the dwarves. They would free my friends.

Just they wait. Just they wait.

Rage coursed through my veins at the memory of my companions all huddled together, hands and feet tied. The fact that these men were cruel and stupid enough not to allow them food precipitated me into a blind rage, the kind of which I had never experienced before. I felt my body react on its own volition, needing to let out this fury I felt in one way or another. Mechanically I grabbed a chair and threw it with all my force against the wall. Then it was a candlestick, then some tools, then the chair again.

During my outburst though I apparently kept my mind clear enough not to throw the table that contained my bags, tools and the hidden mistletoe.

My little rebellion was short lived though. I had never been an aggressive person. Still the notion that all of this mess could have easily been avoided if someone had just listened to reason and just sent words to Thorin's Halls like I said we should…

I was fuming.

Damn the dwarves.

Damn the men.

Damn them all.

I forced myself to take deep calming breathes and finally managed to regain my composure.

Looking outside I could see the sky already darkening. Tonight I'll prepare some more mixture to pour in the water. The symptoms should appear tomorrow; maybe they'll even start tonight. Adding more poison tonight will ensure that the quantities would be enough to at least generate some reaction. I didn't plan on killing anyone, but I needed at least one person to be seriously sick.

I wringed my hands, obviously still disturbed by the fact, that I was being forced into such measures. My anger was actually mostly coming from this situation, and mostly directed at me I realized after awhile. No one was forcing me to act, I just couldn't take the chance and that was my choice. My choice. If someone was to be damned it would be me. If someone were to have an allergic reaction and die, I'd be the murderer.

I hated the dwarves for stupidly being caught like this.

I hated the men even more for acting like ungrateful, prejudiced beasts.

I hated myself most for being so weak that I couldn't find another solution but to disavow my own beliefs.

That night, I poisoned the first cistern once more and started to poison a second one too.

I couldn't sleep anymore.

I had never felt so lonely. Never felt so torn. I really had no idea how I would be able to forgive myself for doing this to innocents. Well, of course some of them weren't entirely blameless, but on the other hand, I knew they were acting on their fears and ignorance. Didn't that make them innocent in a way?

I took my head between my hands and squeezed my eyes shut almost whimpering until I felt something cold brush my cheek.

Immediately I opened my eyes and my hand naturally fell to the side of my head, lightly brushing my braid. The pain in my chest eased a bit. I had to do this. For Balin who was being so unfairly treated. For Dori who was waiting for me, probably beside himself with worry. For the dwarves who were slowly becoming the closest thing I could call a family in this world.

I rubbed the blue stone bead between two fingers and looked at the sky.

If this plan worked, I'd soon be back in Thorin's Halls. I'd see Dís and Oin again, though I truly hoped they would let me continue my apprenticeship even after I had used my knowledge to poison people. Then I'd be once more with Dori and Ori…and Nori.

Closing my eyes I felt a small smile tug at my lips as a memory came to the forefront of my mind and I let the images sooth me as much as they possibly could.

* * *

It was rather late in the afternoon and I was tired. Nori was finally getting better and he could now spend hours out of his bed without being too tired. Things were finally starting to look better, his wound was healing perfectly and now only time and rest would be needed to heal him completely. To say I was relieved would be an understatement. I felt freed by the knowledge nothing bad could happen to him…well at least until the next time he'd go out and try to find whatever it was he needed to find.

Since he was getting better, I was once more going to the healing wards, essentially in the morning, coming back here to check on Nori for lunch before rushing to the market and buy fresh products and then coming back here. I'd spent my early afternoon once more in the wards and then would go back to our apartment to tidy up the place, cook and all this while making sure that Nori didn't overdo it. All in all my days were busier than ever and my nights were short, perturbed by brand new nightmares starring a deadly pale Nori, though the brothers didn't know that part. Surprisingly enough these nightmares didn't make me shout or yell, so none of the brothers would wake, which was great because Nori needed sleep more than I did. On the other hand I would wake in the middle of the night with my face and pillow wet from tears, with fear and despair hindering my breath.

That afternoon in particular I was almost sleepwalking. It was to the point that Oin had simply sent me back home and ordered me not to come back after lunch. Still I couldn't sleep, I needed to prepare some stew and I wanted to bake some apple pie for the brothers too. I knew Nori liked apples and, though the brothers and dwarves in general, didn't really appreciate fruits and vegetables, they unsurprisingly didn't mind a nice pastry or pie once in a while.

Nori was thankfully resting in his room, and both Dori and Ori were working. Dori when he wasn't busy with travelling to sell his products was, I had found out, working with Balin. The two of them were busy during winter times, mostly scheduling the missions for our mercenaries. Ori for his part was always busy writing down many things and was called for all kind of jobs related to this; whether it was writing down contracts or inventorying stocks.

So here I was, alone in the kitchen and fighting to keep my eyes open while trying not to cut my own hand with the insanely sharp knife I was using to peel the vegetables for tonight's stew. I sighed, I was almost done…or not. I had managed to peel only two potatoes in probably half an hour and that clearly wasn't enough to feed three dwarves.

I shook my head, trying to wake myself a bit, and resumed the tedious job.

I was just so tired.

So tired…

So…

…

I woke up with a jolt and immediately felt I was falling when a strong arm encircled my waist and helped me regain my balance. Blinking I realized I was in the kitchen and had most certainly fallen asleep there. I looked around and found out that it was Nori's arm that had saved me from the fall. I really hated these benches; I always seemed to fall from them. I had to ask Dori whether we could find a nice, real chair that I could use instead.

"Nori?" I blurted out, my mind still blurred by sleep.

The dwarf hummed before removing his arm from my waist. Then I realized he was currently cutting vegetables before throwing the pieces in a large cauldron.

"You peeled them all?" I noticed aloud more than asked.

I received another hum in answer and then finally my brain decided to start kicking in. I frowned.

"You should be resting! It's my job to prepare the food."

"Aye. But you need rest more than I do." He answered simply with a shrug.

"I wasn't half dead barely two weeks ago." I replied.

"No you were half dead one hour ago when your face hit the table."

I blushed at his words. All this time he had simply continued cutting the vegetables mechanically, clearly not perturbed by my little rant.

"I…I was just taking a break." I muttered

At that Nori sighed and stopped. He put the knife on the table and shifted slightly on the bench, turning to look me in the eyes.

"Amelia, I can see you're exhausted. Dori and Ori saw it too by the way. What's going on?"

I bit my lip, avoiding his gaze. Why didn't I simply tell him that I hadn't been able to sleep correctly since the day I found him lying on the floor? Why was I keeping it secret? Well, I knew…I was mostly ashamed to react so strongly to the events. I had discovered in this world that I had a real talent to overreact.

"Amelia…" Nori softly whispered before I felt his fingers brushed my cheekbones. "Why don't you want to let me help you?"

"You've been helping me since I stepped in this world Nori. Right now you need to take care of yourself, you've been hurt." I replied, still avoiding his eyes.

He scoffed.

"I'm fine. But worrying for you does tire me incredibly."

Ooooh… the bastard. He was using my worries for him against me. I turned my gaze to him and glared at him. He smirked, clearly smug, and winked at me.

"Now, tell me what's going on." He said and I sighed.

"I'm just…" I paused, rubbing my hand tiredly on my forehead. "I'm just tired Nori, that's all."

He observed me intently for a minute, unnerving me, though I managed not to squirm under his gaze. I could see the concern in his grey eyes.

"Nightmares?" He asked though I had the feeling he already knew the answer, and he probably did.

I nodded, there was nothing else to say about the subject, or so I thought. Nori for his part, apparently believed we still had lots to say about it. I hadn't known him so talkative in a while, and to be honest at the moment I wasn't sure I liked it. Well I did like when Nori and I would talk, but I didn't want him to know what my nightmares consisted of.

"Amelia." He put one hand on my shoulder, squeezing it lightly. "You know these men will not harm you. You know we'll protect you and that you're safe here, right? No one would harm you, I promise."

His voice was so soft, the whisper so full of concern and worry. I could tell just by how he sounded how much he cared and how much he hated to learn I still suffered from nightmares. At that moment I knew I just had to let him know. I couldn't let him believe I felt unsafe here, with them.

"Nori, it's not that." I whispered so lowly it was surprising that he heard. "I don't see them anymore. Haven't in a while actually."

"Then what are you dreaming of?" his whisper was just as low as mine as he frowned.

After a long minute of silence, I bit my lip and closed my eyes.

"Amelia, what do you see?" He insisted kindly.

"You. That night. But in my dreams I fail."

I didn't need to say more. Of course he understood. In a second I found myself crushed in his arms, against his chest and even in my surprise I tried to protest.

"Nori, your wounds…"

But the only result it had was that his arms brought me closer still and I finally relented. Circling his waist with my arms I let my head rest on his shoulder, turning it so that my nose would be brushing his beard. I closed my eyes while he tilted his head to let it rest on the top of mine. I was so close to him that I could feel his heart beat strongly against his chest. I let that feeling lull me into a peaceful doze while Nori held me tightly.

Neither of us seemed to want to let go, so we remained like this for a long time, only separating when we heard the entrance door open. Then in a matter of seconds Nori was once more cutting vegetables and I was starting to peel the apples.

Dori and Ori came in, greeting us warmly before joyously helping with the preparation of our dinner.

I exchanged just one glance with Nori, but for the first time in awhile, I couldn't decipher his eyes or his face, his blank mask was back in place.

That night, I had another nightmare. This time though, I didn't let the fear and despair keep me awake for long. I fell back asleep thinking of Nori and how I had felt in his arms.

Safe.

* * *

I smiled at the memory. I had no idea how Nori did it, but his ability to calm me and sooth me was rather incredible. I let my head rest against the wood of the windowsill and kept my gaze on the stars. I was still playing absentmindedly with my braid.

I just needed to be patient. I had no choice but to wait.

And my patience was quickly rewarded. The first symptoms appeared the following day, in the afternoon. It was a young girl. A very young girl.

An awful feeling twisted my stomach and I couldn't eat at all that day.

It had started with mild stomach pain in the morning, or so I was told later, and had escalated to greater pain and vomiting by the end of the afternoon. Her mother to try and make her feel better, was forcing the girl to drink some fresh water. That day, no one thought much of it. After all, anyone could feel sick and have stomach pains once in awhile.

That night I poisoned three cisterns.

Sleep was but a memory.

* * *

Two days later the town's people decided they should ask the "healer" for help. I had saved the young boy before, I should save them now. Even though many did not trust me, simply because I was friend with the dwarves, they all agreed that they needed help quickly. I was simply there, in the little house, the only healer for miles and miles around. They needed me and they knew it.

I was sitting near the window, looking at the mountains forlornly when they entered the house, without knocking at the door. I was too tired to comment on this, by now four of the cisterns had been poisoned. The men explained the situation, not knowing I already knew more than them, and I was then asked to follow them to the town's master's house. In what seemed to usually be the living room, makeshift beds had been set up for the sick.

Hurray for me. On my very first try I had managed to poison seven people. I almost winced when I saw the seven beds and the families crowding their ill loved ones. I could see the little girl, so pale and shivering terribly, two teenagers, one old man, two women and a young adult man.

How would I ever be able to face Master Oin and Dís?

How would I ever be able to face Dori, Nori and Ori?

They would hate me for sure.

The simple idea that the three brothers could despise me brought tears in my eyes. They were so honourable, so serious about protecting weak and innocent peoples…how would they react when they would learn of my actions? I had no illusions that they wouldn't find out, I was almost certain I wouldn't be able to hide my doings if they asked me. I couldn't lie to them and telling them the truth would probably doom me to solitude. I shook my head and blinked away the tears, I needed to focus.

Thankfully the people around thought I was feeling sad for them and that I was moved by the sight of the sick. Well, it's not that I didn't feel anything for them, but knowing I was responsible for the poisoning, it would be quite hypocritical to act surprised and emotional about it now.

I was egoistical and clearly despicable but at least I was usually honest, when I wasn't lying to people after feeding them dangerous toxins.

I forced my brain to focus once more on the present. Now would be one of the most difficult parts for me. Every fibre of my being was already revolting against me poisoning water. I knew already that the next step on my plan would be worse than the previous one.

"Lady Amelia, please can you help?"

I didn't answer and I made a great show of silently palpating the ill, examining each of them meticulously. In truth I was both acting the part and stalling for time; I really didn't like what I was going to do next and was dreading my next words. All in all I made it last for more than one hour.

Once I had finished examining the last one, the little girl, all the families came back to me and crowded me. I gingerly stepped away, unsure of their reactions to come.

"Lady Amelia, what do they have? Why are they sick?" The woman sounded clearly scared.

"They have ingested a bad toxin." I replied flatly, I knew perfectly the word toxin was not part of their vocabulary.

They all looked at each other, hesitating and obviously not sure of what I was saying before one man cleared his throat and asked with a shaky voice.

"Can you heal them please?"

I observed him with an emotionless face, he had been next to the girl and probably was either her brother or father. Father more likely. I didn't blink when I answered evenly.

"I can do it."

I lifted a hand to make all the cheers and relieved exclamations stop. Oh…I really hated myself. The words burned my throat, scorched my tongue as I uttered them emotionlessly.

"I can do it. But I won't do it for free."

Wow. I could have thrown icy water in their face and I'd have the same reaction. They all stood still, facing me with eyes wide, jaws slack.

"But…but you're a healer." One of them stammered.

"Yes. I am. I have been trained by various masters, two of them being dwarves; both of them being friends with your prisoners." I stated coldly.

"You would let them die?' A blond woman screeched gesturing to the seven ill villagers.

"I never said anything remotely close to that." I was trying my hardest to sound cold and haughty. Apparently it worked.

"You know we won't pay you any money." The town's master spat, glaring at me. "We should lock you down with those filthy dwarves. We should have done so immediately."

"You could do that. But then they'd all die. That's quite a high price to pay don't you think? It might be in your best interest to hear what I have to say." I shrugged.

"Or not!" A middle aged farmer snarled before storming out of the room.

I couldn't let them see how terrible I felt. My pain had to be hidden deep inside. I couldn't let them know I was bluffing either, from the look of it, and if they didn't drink more poisoned water, these people should survive.

The master was glaring at me, disdain and hate painted quite clearly on his hideous face. He was too stubborn for his own good but I didn't plan on making him change his mind. I was banking on the families who had members lying sick behind me. They should be able to force the master's hand into agreeing with whatever I'd ask. The major problem in this plan being that those very same families should feel close to desperate right about now…and there was nothing predictable about desperate people. They could just as easily listen to me or kill me in a fit of rage, though I did hope they'd listen and bargain with me, that was, after all, my goal. I had done everything to arrive at that precise moment where they'd need my skills.

I was threatening to let their loved ones die. What would they do?

That was a terrible gamble I was taking and I could just hope I hadn't poorly bet. The room was as silent as a tomb before some ominous noises came to my ears. My heart plummeted down my stomach when I heard thuds and sounds of obvious struggling and groaning. I didn't need to see what was happening to know that at least one dwarf would soon barrel through the door unwillingly.

Damn. They had way too many hostages and if I didn't solve the matter tonight, I won't have a second chance. I didn't doubt that I'd be under some sort of heavy surveillance after my little speech and act. The master would never let me leave his house free, I knew it.

A few minutes later I saw one of the dwarves being thrown on the floor in a heap. The rope tying his feet had been cut but not the ones binding his hands. My chest tightened painfully. Of course it just had to be Bofur. Not like they could choose one of those I was less attached too. It honestly wouldn't change anything much, but at least it'd be easier to concentrate without the sight of one of my close friends with a bloody knife pressed on his neck.

It was obvious to me that he didn't quite understand what was happening. He was struggling wildly against the ropes that were probably cutting his wrists. When his gaze fell on me though, I saw him tense. He quite evidently quieted down and took the time to observe his surroundings. Then he met my eyes and I could see he was starting to catch up with my plan, even though he hopefully couldn't guess how it had started.

I didn't think I could bear to see the rejection and disgust in his eyes right now.

The man that held him on the floor pressed the blade in his hand a little bit closer to Bofur's neck.

I wanted to scream and throw myself at the man before painfully tearing his eyes away from their sockets with my own hands. I almost startled then as I was quite surprised to find out I had such a violent streak in me and I struggled not to let it show.

I could be proud of my performance. Even though I was terrified, I kept a blank face and cold, steely eyes. I was thinking about all the villains who had terrified me when I was a child watching movies and was now trying to play the role. Apparently, judging from the peasants' reaction, I wasn't doing too bad an impression.

No one spoke. The only sounds being heard were the painful moans of the sick.

I quirked an eyebrow while I struggled to remain as impassive as possible. I steeled my muscles to avoid shaking like a leaf in the wind and tore my eyes away from Bofur's.

"If you don't want your friend…" The man spat that word viciously "…to die then heal my brother!"

I looked at the peasant blankly. He glared back, pressing this blasted knife against the dwarf's neck. Then my gaze flitted to Bofur who was raising a questioning eyebrow at me. I wanted to sigh exasperatedly at him and resisted the urge to roll my eyes; I hope he could guess my sarcasm 'No Bofur, I won't let you die…not willingly at least.'

I needed to act now or who knew what this stupid peasant was going to do. Looking back at him, straight in his eyes I hummed and took a step in their direction.

The man jerked, strengthening his hold on Bofur and pressing the blade almost to the point it'd pierce the skin. I saw red inside but quickly bottled up those terrible feelings that menaced to make me lose sight of my goal. I needed my brain and my wit to work at their best right now. Rage would only hinder me and endanger both me and my companions.

"So…" I said icily "What makes you think that killing my companions would in any way help you save your brother?"

I looked at the man and saw a glint of uncertainty spark in his dull brown eyes. Then I glanced at the glowering master and finally turned around, pointedly ignoring the peasant and the master as I talked to no one in particular.

"I have something you want. Skills. Healing skills. I could save your loved ones." I paused here, purposely to let those words sink in their brains. "Now as I said, I won't offer them for free anymore. I already healed one of your children for free and look how you repaid my kindness."

I really had watched too many movies. My words were so cheesy, so corny, it was like a very cheap show and yet these people bought it. I turned back once more pointing my finger at the man who was holding Bofur. My movements were sharp and I was surprised that, despite my size, those tall men seemed to inch slightly back. Not letting such things trouble my concentration, I kept on talking, voice colder than ever.

"Threatening me and my kin, that is how you repay kindness." I forced a disdainful look on my face, which wasn't difficult at the moment considering all the negative feelings that threatened to suffocate me.

"We let you stay with us, free and safe!" An elderly man exclaimed.

"How can I be safe without the protection of my kin?" I snorted derisively.

"You're completely mad! Enslaved by the dwarves!" Someone spat.

"Well, even if you were right, which you are not, I wonder why it should matter to you."

That silenced them all for a second and I could see several exchanged uncertain glances. I forced myself not to smirk. Well, I just needed a little bit more luck. The master's was about to talk but I didn't let him enough time to utter any word.

"So, as I was saying before being rudely interrupted, I will agree to heal all these people. But I will ask for payment, and I won't require gold."

The master's eyes narrowed and I could hear some people around sighing with relief.

"Let me guess, you want us to free the dwarves, right?" The town's master said lowly.

This time I did allow myself to smirk slyly, as I stared right back at him, unperturbed by his hostile glare.

"Why should I want gold in such a situation? I wonder." I said smirking, before once more schooling my features into an emotionless mask. "Can we discuss like adults now?"

At the murmurs and whispers around, the master and I both knew he had no choice. My plan was coming along quite nicely for now. I could only hope my luck wouldn't abandon me suddenly.

"Alright." He nodded begrudgingly. "What do you want exactly?"

I took a deep breath and glanced at Bofur. He seemed calmer and had obviously guessed what was going to happen next.

"First. All my friends have to be released and fed. Secondly, I want a contract to be drawn and signed between our two communities to avoid such problems in the future. Dwarves should be able to pass through your town safely, even stay the night if they so wish and in exchange they'll provide you with better tools and other items you might want or need. You will see the details with Master Balin." As an afterthought I played my only trump card that might convince the town's folks. "I will add my healer's skills in the agreement too if you so wish."

He seemed to hesitate way too long for my taste so I kept on talking seemingly emotionless.

"I ask for nothing more than what you were ready to discuss and agree to a few days ago. I'm even offering you the skills of a true healer. Besides do you really think you can afford to offend the dwarves of Thorin's Halls? Do not doubt for a minute that if we're not soon on our way back there, many more dwarves would come down the mountain to look for us."

I could see the doubt in the peasants' eyes. Forcing a soft tone in my voice I finally said.

"An agreement will be beneficial to us all, surely you can see that."

"She's right." I was rather surprised to hear an elder man mutter.

"Aye, she is." That one was a woman.

For a second I thought no one would protest, but obviously it couldn't quite work like that.

"What about the fact they planned to attack us?"

I made a show of rolling my eyes and sighed.

"They didn't plan to attack you. They were simply worried. We hadn't thought coming to an agreement with you would take so long. The others only came to find out what was taking us so long and as we already said, dwarves always travel with weapons, surely you can understand that."

That managed to shut them up. Some of the men even looked sheepish while a few women looked uncertain. Soon at least half the people around were muttering their agreement and at long last the master grimaced and nodded before he looked me in the eyes.

"Fine. We'll draw a contract with the dwarves and we'll come to an agreement with them. Now help them."

I didn't like the way that ugly man thought he could order me around. I narrowed my eyes at him and said coldly.

"No. First, please, be kind enough to ask your friend to release mine. Let me assure you, if blood is drawn all agreements will be invalidated. Free all the dwarves who are being held downstairs and provide them with food, give them all their weapons back too. Then I believe two of your advisors and yourself should go in a separate room with Balin, Bofur and Péri. The six of you will be able to draw and sign a contract while I take care of the people here."

"You give a lot of order for someone so young." The master snapped.

"You're free not to obey. But then whatever drama happens will be on your hands, not mine." I shrugged.

He grunted in response and gestured to the man who was holding Bofur. He didn't seem happy to let the dwarf go but he obeyed nonetheless. Soon Bofur was free and I strode to him, checking him quickly for any injuries.

"You were amazing lass…"

"Not now Bofur" I couldn't help but retort rather coldly.

I was slightly relieved that my plan had functioned so far, but it didn't mean I was feeling better about it all. Anger, shame, self-loathing and so many more dark feeling were brewing just beneath the surface. If I were to lose my concentration now I truly had no idea how I'd react.

It wasn't as if it was a habit of mine to go and poison everyone around and then blame myself for it. And with my past, there was no way I could deal with such events in a carefree manner. I swallowed sickly and forced my focus on Bofur.

He sent a concerned look in my direction but I simply ignored him. Waiting with my arms crossed on my chest for the other dwarves to be freed. We didn't wait more than ten minutes before shouts began. I sighed. I was close to snapping. Really snapping.

I briskly strode to the door and I could easily hear the voices groaning and shouting. I followed the noise, Bofur next to me, and was at least thankful to hear all the dwarves calm down at my sight.

I looked at each dwarf intently.

"Is any of you hurt?" I managed to say though my cold voice seemed suddenly foreign to my ears.

"No. We're fine my dear." Balin answered hesitatingly.

"Balin, you, Péri and Bofur can arrange an agreement today. I believe if you work efficiently and calmly enough, we can all leave this place by tomorrow morning." I said quickly.

I didn't give any of them any time to talk to me further. I walked back to the sick people and faced the consequences of my awful actions. Biting on my lower lip I started by turning to face one of the woman.

"Do you have any garlic left?"

"Hem…ye…Yes I think we do."

"I'll need enough for all of them, please go and bring it back."

I took a slow, calming breath and then turned towards the other people who were healthy and still there.

"I believe this people are suffering from a form of natural poisoning." It wasn't really a lie, now was it? "It's most frequently encountered when there isn't any running water around to drink." Again…it was easier to poison cisterns than rivers, right? "When was the last time you emptied and cleaned the water cisterns?"

"Hem…I don't, I don't really remember." One of the peasants said hesitating.

"Well, I strongly suggest you go empty them and clean them now. Don't drink any more water from it. Don't even use that water to wash what may come into contact with food."

"Are you sure?" The woman who asked seemed scared. "Such a thing never happened before."

I felt a lump in my throat but did my best to remain stoic.

"Really?" How did I manage to sound so disbelieving? "No one has ever been sick before?"

"Well sure…"

"This kind of toxin will not poison everyone; some may be sick today and won't be in two years. There's nothing certain, just, clean the cisterns." I had never told so many lies in my life before.

"But we won't have any water left…"

"Isn't there any river nearby enough for a few of you to go and gather some water while you wait for rain to fall?"

"Well, we don't usually go…it's quite far and it would take so much time to bring water for everyone." One man said while rubbing the back of his head.

"I do suggest you do it, at least until rain fall once more." I insisted, I couldn't tell them that some of the cisterns hadn't been contaminated.

I saw one of them nod and leave quickly, probably to arrange buckets and other things needed. It only strengthened my guilt to know that these people would struggle to get water until rain fell.

On those words I spent the whole afternoon and night taking care of the town's folks. The fact that none of them died didn't make me feel better in the slightest. The men hadn't seen anything when cleaning the cisterns, which didn't make the huge weight on my shoulders lift either.

No.

I was still in a terrible mood.

It was early afternoon the next day when the dwarves finally decided to leave this town. Until then I really hadn't had any time to speak with them. Now though, we were already walking in the directions of the mountains and the group around me was strangely silent.

I didn't pay attention to the glances I received, walking silently, looking straight ahead and clearly not paying attention to anyone. I only wanted to be home but my heart was beating painfully and loudly. Guilt and fear were battling for dominance in my chest and both were hurting me.

At first Balin and Bofur tried to speak with me, asking how I was, clearly worrying about my sudden silence. I didn't mean to but I just couldn't speak to them. My throat was too dry, my thought too muddied. All the feelings I had bottled up in town were menacing to get the better of me. At some point even Dwalin tried to come and talk with me.

All the dwarves were clearly on edge at the sight of my sudden muteness and numbness. I was completely lost in my mind and didn't pay any attention to my companions. Among all the dreadful thoughts that whirled in my mind, among the memories and faces long gone that still haunted me, I could punctually see three friendly smiles.

I wanted Dori, Nori and Ori.

I wanted to see them so much.

I needed to see them.

I needed to know they wouldn't despise me for my dishonourable acts.

* * *

**A/N: Again, thank you all for reading/reviewing/and following this story. It is always amazing to read reviews :) I can't explain how happy I feel each time I receive one. **

**Mary: I'm glad you ended up enjoying the chapter ^^ I hope you weren't disappointed by this one, I promise lots of Ri brothers in the next chapter :P**

**So... I know some of you had guessed more or less what Amelia was going to do, and I truly hope it came out believable. You can't imagine the trouble I've had to find a poisonous plant that I could use...I did cause this trouble myself, but I needed something that grew in the middle of winter in plains nearby mountains... I truly hated myself for a moment when I wrote this chapter :)**

**I hope Amelia didn't come out too whiny...that truly wasn't my goal. Well, she does overreact and always beat herself, but I hope it wasn't too extreme and unbelievable here. **

**I added the Nori scene for all of those who missed him in the previous chapter, and because of it this chapter turned huge. It seems I can't stop the words sometime, but I truly didn't want to cut the chapter in two.**

**I still struggle with the rewriting/ massive edit of some later chapter and I decided to delete two of them completely. So the next update will probably be around Friday. I don't think I'll manage to update earlier.**

**I hope you enjoyed the update! **


	18. Confessions in the Dark

**Everything belongs to JRR Tolkien except for my OC and the plot.**

**Warning:****The opinions or topics used do NOT reflect my personal opinion in any way. Do NOT assume I am actually giving my opinion in this chapter, or wish to start any kind of debate, I DON'T.**

* * *

We left that stupid town rather quickly, walking fast as if running away though I knew the dwarves were probably only eager to put as big a distance as possible between us and that damned village. They weren't afraid, that I knew for sure, but they simply wanted to quickly be home and reassure the others that awaited us.

We walked until late that evening. The sun had almost already disappeared behind the horizon when we finally stopped to camp under the trees. None of the dwarves bothered me that night, though I could feel their worried eyes observing me. I simply sat, my back leaning against a trunk, and remained rather motionless while they all prepared fire and food. Bofur brought me some bread and meat, but I truly couldn't eat.

I dozed off for awhile but my thoughts were plagued by the faces of the sick peoples in that town. Guilt was suffocating me slowly, anger eating at me, and then, suddenly, brutally, the faces of my past came up to the surface of my thoughts. At the forefront I could see the newspapers displaying photos of my father just below the catchy headlines. Then the long forgotten voices rang in my ears, mocking, accusing, insulting.

_'You shouldn't be here!' 'How could they allow someone like you to try and be a doctor?''You think she'll turn like him? -Well, the apple doesn't fall far from the tree…'_

I clenched my fists. I was struggling to keep everything bottled up.

I was glad to see the sun rise the following morning. I barely ate, picking at the food Bofur brought me. My stomach was knotted and my brain clouded. I didn't speak a word that day, and I could feel that the dwarves were starting to be seriously concerned. I could hear Balin's and Bofur's whispers behind me and I could feel each of Dwalin's glances towards me. Even Hràr and Péri were quite obviously nervous about my incomprehensible silence, as were the others.

I was so tired.

Anger and fear kept me going though.

Why was I angry again? I couldn't really remember. I had been furious when I had been in Gorm, planning the whole poisoning thing, but why couldn't I let it go? What other choice did I have back then? None. At least none that I knew of. Then why was I still so angry? Was it really because of this, or was it because all those people, those voices that haunted me, had been right in the end?

The apple doesn't fall far from the tree indeed.

The fear at least was something I could deal with. I could deal with it simply because I knew what I was afraid of. Mainly I was terrified of the reactions the dwarves will have when they would know. Because they would have to react, they couldn't possibly forget about it. Could they?

This fear was tearing me apart. At the moment I didn't know what I wanted most, run towards Thorin's Halls and the brothers' familiarity and safety…or run far away, far from their judgement and their potential rejection.

At some point on the second day I realized that Dwalin, Bofur and Balin started to slow their paces and I had automatically imitated them without realizing it. We stopped early that evening and even though my mind was clouded by other thoughts, I couldn't miss the fact that all the other dwarves weren't camping with us. They were already further away, probably hurrying to give news to the King about the trade agreements and the situation that occurred in Gorm.

I for my part couldn't really care less. I seemed unable to speak as I wondered endlessly if there had been other possible solutions. Then I pondered on fate, genetics, family curses and other similar topics. My mind was buzzing with all those thoughts and it was only sheer exhaustion that allowed my eyes to close that night. When I woke up though, I felt far from rested. I didn't need to have medical knowledge to know that I needed to rest and soon or something would break, whether it was my body or my mind which will shut down I didn't know. I just knew that I couldn't last forever in such a state, but try as I might, I couldn't reign on my fears and I needed the anger to keep going.

So I fuelled the anger, remembering the hate I had felt against my father, thinking about how I hated the men of Gorm, basically focusing on negative and angry thoughts instead of the fears.

By the end of the journey I was walking like an automat, looking at my feet, not paying attention to anything around me. My eyes were open but unseeing, my ears worked but I didn't ear. I didn't even startle when a heavy hand fell on my shoulder. Glancing to my side I saw Balin worriedly look at me. I attempted to smile at him but failed utterly. He pointed forward and my gaze turned back to look straight ahead.

Glancing up I felt my chest tightened at the sight in front of me.

The massive doors of Thorin's Halls were standing tall, opened and not even twenty meters away, under the door's arch, stood Dori, Nori, Ori, among other dwarves who were all clearly waiting for us. My brain though only registered the faces of the three brothers. They were talking together but from where I stood I couldn't clearly see their faces, I didn't miss the moment they finally saw us though.

Suddenly, my body seemed to forget its exhaustion and a rush of adrenaline gave me the energy to run toward them. My fear and anger were dismissed for a moment; I needed the brothers, needed to see them, to be with them. Now. I'll worry about their disappointment later. I stumbled a few time but managed to quickly make my way towards them, and as soon as they saw me, they rushed towards me too.

I was soon crushed into a group hug with my three favourite dwarves.

Oh, how much I had missed them.

I let a shaky breath out. I was finally home. They were still here for me. They didn't know yet. I could push away the negative feelings that plagued me a little, I could forget about them for a short while still.

Dori was right here, in front of me; strong, calm, comforting.

Ori was at my right, rubbing my arm; sweet, caring, understanding.

And Nori. I could feel his hands, one on my shoulder the other on my back. I basked in the feelings he evoked; peace, safety, warmth.

The three of them protected me from the world.

Clutching Dori's purple tunic more tightly in my fists I felt as though all the barriers I had put in my mind would soon break and I didn't relish having a public breakdown. With my face still hidden in Dori's chest and the rest of my person properly hidden by Nori and Ori at my sides, I looked slightly up and whispered with my heart in my throat.

"I want to go home…" It sounded like a plea, and truthfully, it was.

Among the loud chatters and warm welcomes that were booming around us from all the other dwarves, it was a marvel that the three brothers heard me. I saw them look at each other and I couldn't miss Ori's worried glance and Nori's narrowed eyes. Apparently they didn't like how I sounded right now. Dori simply nodded and gathered me in his arms, lifting me up as if I weighted nothing, and without saying a word to the others he just walked in the direction of our home. Taking a glimpse above his shoulder I saw Nori and Ori in a heated discussion with Bofur, Balin and Dwalin, and they soon were joined by Dís and Oin.

Dori and I were already in one of the long corridors when I suddenly realized I was basically forcing an old dwarf to carry me around.

"Dori, if I'm too heavy you can put me down." I whispered glad to hear my voice was still working even if it were barely audible.

I had completely lost my voice on the way back. It was a marvel though that the simple fact of being here, with the brothers, would bring it back. Right at this instant, in Dori's arms, I felt as safe as a child being held by her parents could. Dori snorted at my whispers and simply told me I didn't weight even near as much as what he could carry.

"I'm strong Amelia, don't you worry about me."

He only put me down after having kicked our home's door open and entered the living room. He gently and carefully helped me on my feet and looked at me worriedly.

"My dear, how about I fix you some soup? Chamomile maybe?"

"Chamomile would be great Dori." I answered with a shaky voice.

He observed me while I stumbled to the chair nearest to the fire and let myself fall in it. The roaring flames in the earth did nothing to really warm me though and I let my mind drift away once more as I was alone.

When he came back, a tray in his hands, the door opened to let Nori and Ori in. As soon as they saw me, they rushed to my sides, helping Dori by handing me the warm cup that was on his tray.

Nori looked at me with intense concern and worry. He softly took my hands in his and helped me take a hold on the steaming cup.

"Can you drink by yourself?"

I simply nodded and took a sip of chamomile sugared with a copious amount of honey. Tears welled up once more in my eyes and I hated myself for it. As soon as they appeared I felt the brothers tense and I had to try and ease their worries.

"I'm fine…" I tried to convince us all. "It's just." I hesitated slightly. "It just tastes like home."

I let my gaze fall and I stared at the cup filled with warm liquid. For a moment, all my worries and fears seemed to drift away and I could only feel warmth and peace. It truly did feel like home.

"I'm happy to be back." I whispered.

"We're glad you're back."

And just like that, because of a few words whispered by Ori that warmed my heart more than I thought it would be possible, I felt tears start to gather in my eyes again. This feeling of peace clashed rather violently with all the negative ones that still battled in my mind. I was aware that Ori had taken the cup away from my trembling hands and when I started to cry Nori had already taken hold of my hands. It wasn't enough though. With a sob I almost jumped out of my chair, launching myself towards Nori who didn't waste time and encircled my waist tightly with his arms.

I clutched at his tunic, crying loudly, my face hidden against his chest while he held me against him. I could feel Ori rubbing my shoulder and arm, trying to soothe me. The poor dwarf probably looked completely lost at the moment. Dori was kindly patting my head, and the thought that they might never do that again once they would know didn't help me at all. My breathing was completely erratic by that point and I wasn't paying any attention to what was happening around me.

The three brothers were whispering hurriedly in Khuzdul and, though I couldn't understand a word, the sounds of their voices oddly started to sooth me a bit. I had no idea how long it took them, put at some point Nori started to hum and I heard the sounds of flutes. The oddity of this broke me completely out of my torpor and I blinked, looking slightly around though I didn't free Nori from my hold on his tunic. A few steps away from us, Dori and Ori were playing a soft, appeasing tune that once combined with Nori's deep hum lulled me to a peaceful state.

By the time they ended it, I was calm again and was listening to the music with my eyes half closed. Tears still escaped my eyes from time to time but it was nothing like the painful sobs that had wracked my body minutes earlier.

"You alright?" Nori whispered in my ears and I shivered.

Nori probably sensed it because he tightened his hold a bit before starting to rub my back with one of his hand. I took a long breathe and finally nodded.

"Better." I managed to croak and Ori offered me a sweet, though a bit sad, smile.

"You're home now, you shouldn't worry about anything." Dori said while coming closer and patting my head.

I felt a lump in my throat but nodded to let him know I had heard. Fear menaced to grow once more in my chest but was thankfully stopped when Nori squeezed me lightly with his arms still around my waist. I looked at him and saw his grey eyes shine with concern. His brows were furrowed too and I understood he must have felt me tense. His strong presence against me somehow managed to give me some much needed courage. I hated to see him so concerned and worried. Swallowing thickly I decided I needed to do something about it. Besides I just needed to see his smirk, I wanted to see him wink at me as if nothing had happened.

I cleared my throat a bit and tried to offer him a smile.

"You know," I squeaked. "You told me to beware bandits, wolves and trolls…"

His frown deepened a bit and he hummed.

"You never said peasants were dangerous. I think you should add it to the list next time."

I knew what I said wasn't really funny and my shaky voice just sounded miserable. But for one reason or another, I saw a small, very small, smirk tug at his lips. The relief I felt at the moment I saw it weakened my knees and Nori gently helped me back to my seat. Ori was smiling sweetly at me and Nori hovered nearby. None of them wanted to let me out of their sight apparently.

Ori was now kneeling at my right and Nori sat on the floor at my left. Dori was back in the kitchen and, by the smell of it, was preparing some stew or soup for me. I absentmindedly heard a soft knock at the door but didn't look up until I saw a form moving towards me. Glancing up I was honestly surprised to see Dís, Bofur and Balin coming closer to me, followed by Ori who apparently had been the one to open the door.

"I brought you back your bag." Balin gently said, before putting said bag on the floor beside a small coffee table.

All the dwarves observed me and my fear came back at the forefront of my mind. Swallowing thickly I felt my shoulder slump and I frowned. I worried about my friends' reactions, I was really scared about what they would say. Would they tell me the same things I heard so many times in the past? If they did I knew it would hurt me much more this time around, after all I cared for them and their opinions.

They all took some seat and Ori handed me my cup of chamomile tea with a soft, encouraging smile. He knew what this simple drink meant to me. Time passed in silence while I gingerly sipped the warm liquid. Nori now sat in a chair facing mine; he had taken his pipe out and was smoking, observing me silently. Dori came back from the kitchen some short time later and took a seat between Balin and Bofur and I could hear them whisper with Dís. Ori was seating just next to me and silently observed my every move, just like Nori did, though I guessed that they could understand the whispers of our friends whereas I couldn't.

I didn't know how long we had been silent when Ori chose to speak.

"What happened for you to be so sad?"

Ori's voice sounded probably as sad as I felt. I looked at him and felt my heart plummet in my stomach. I flinched and my fears and worries took the best part of me. I suddenly could imagine in vivid details what they would say. I pictured myself being despised and hated.

Dwarves were so honourable. They were so serious and intent about protecting innocents and weak people from harm. They took so much pride in their honesty and righteousness. They had the heart in the right place, my aunt would have said.

I might have been idealizing them a bit, but for all their flaws, they had so many more qualities. They had saved me, helped me, and protected me. They were good people.

And what I did just wasn't up to par.

It was sneaky, treacherous, and despicable.

I had intentionally poisoned people.

Dwarves fought their battles head-on. They didn't do it in such a vile way.

They wouldn't understand why I did that. They would only find me pitiful, weak and despicable.

While all those thoughts whirled in my mind endlessly, Dori apparently decided that my reaction was simply not logical and, instead of waiting for me to be able to talk, asked the others for more information.

"Balin, what happened in that town? Did the men hurt her?" Dori's voice was controlled but I could hear the cold fury beneath the calm tone.

"I truly don't think so Dori. She looked fine when we were freed."

"Aye, more than fine I'd say. She shut down on our way back. Didn't utter a word." Bofur added.

"And that didn't worry you?" It was Nori's turn to use a frighteningly calm tone.

"Well…"

"I didn't follow you 'cause you said I wouldn't be needed. You said you'd protect her." Nori continued with the same, scary voice.

"Wait, Thorin was the one who thought you shouldn't go. T'is not my fault if your face is known in certain…"

Listening to them all fight didn't help me whatsoever. I was already so tired, so anxious, and to see them so angry already didn't bode well for me in when they would find out. I was going to be completely ostracised, just like my father, worse even. I felt tears burn my eyes and a cold shiver ran down my spine.

"Amelia!" A worried cry broke their dispute.

My chest constricted and I found it suddenly very hard to breath. In a second, Nori was beside me, kneeling next to my chair, his hands taking mine while I realized I had let my cup fall on the floor. In the meantime I hadn't paid any attention to Dís who had reacted as quickly as the others and had opened my travelling bag already. She took my medicine satchel. I could hear the others speak together but I couldn't find it in me to react.

"Dís, can't you do something?" Dori asked hurriedly.

"I know she has some lavender in there, it'll sooth her a bit." She said while looking in my satchel.

My heart missed a beat and I clenched my fists. My gaze fell on Dís and observed with a very odd fascination as she took the small leather bag that contained the remnants of mistletoe. I saw her open it and heard her gasp clearly.

"What is it?" Dori asked worriedly while standing and coming beside me.

"Oh…Amelia…" Dís soft voice whispered. "Amelia what have you done?"

I looked at her, terrified, and tried to speak. A choke was the only sound I made. The dwarves were looking from me to her, not understanding what was going on, why Dís had spoken in such a soft and sad voice and why I was frozen on the spot. Only Nori didn't look at Dís, his eyes were riveted on me and I could feel his thumbs brushing against my knuckles absentmindedly as all his attention was clearly focused on me. I looked at Dís helplessly, I had no words to express what I felt at that moment and I was too scared to speak. I wasn't stupid. I knew this was it. This was the moment when they would all learn about what I did. I couldn't look at her anymore and I lowered my head, staring at Nori's hands instead.

Seeing that I wouldn't or rather couldn't answer her, Dís turned toward Bofur and Balin.

"Bofur, Balin, tell me exactly what was happening in that town when you all got freed." I saw her frown as she spoke.

"What? Well, hem…" Bofur stuttered.

"I wouldn't know much…" Balin muttered, frowning too. "I was in the cellar while Bofur was taken upstairs. Though I know that Amelia planned something to help us out, I had no idea what she did."

"Bofur!" Dís' voice was stern now as she turned to face him. "Tell me now what happened exactly!"

"Well, I don't know exactly what happened." He shrugged. "Some people were sick and they obviously needed Meli's help. She bargained her healing skills in order to free us."

"Aye, six, maybe seven of them were ill." Balin added then.

"They were sick you say?" Dís asked in a small voice and I flinched.

I knew she had already connected the dots. Nori's hands squeezed mine lightly and I glanced at him, did he know too? Apparently he didn't because his eyes only reflected worry and concern. I had rarely seen him so worried too. I felt my lower lip quiver and bit it harshly to stop it. My gaze went back to Nori's and mine hands. Will he jerk away from me when he'll understand? I remembered how people had reacted to my father after…

I squeezed my eyes shut, trying my best to forget about my past. Meanwhile, Bofur was still talking to Dís.

"Well, aye they were. They were mostly sick in the stomach I think." Bofur shrugged, not understanding where Dís' questions were getting at.

I couldn't take it anymore. I had the sudden urge to see how Dís was taking in the news that I had poisoned people. My eyes met hers. I was terrified of her reaction and she knew it. Just as I knew she had guessed my deeds.

"Oh Amelia" She sighed.

I hiccupped.

Suddenly Nori's hands let go of mine and my heart broke.

It literally broke.

He had jerked away.

But then I felt him sit on the armchair just next to me. He was so close I could feel the warmth of his body and when Nori's arm snaked around me and squeezed my shoulders I closed my eyes in relief. Maybe he hadn't understood yet, which meant he might still jump away from me, but for the moment I didn't want to think about it, I just wanted to hope. Meanwhile his other hand took hold of one of mine again and resumed brushing my knuckles lightly. His presence kept me together and managed somehow to calm me slightly, though I was still unable to face them all. A terrified looking Ori was gently rubbing my right arm, and it pained me immensely to see this look on his face.

"What is going on Dís?" Dori was getting nervous, I could tell from the way he sounded.

Dís shook her head slowly before sighing once more and finally she spoke the words I had wished never to hear.

"She purposely poisoned the people in town to make them need a healer. I guess in order to bargain for the others' liberty, right?"

I closed my eyes and bit my lower lip violently. I clenched my fists so strongly that I felt my nails pierce my skin in my right hand. The sting in my palm was nothing compared to the hurt in my chest. I didn't dare look up at them. I didn't dare see their reactions.

The people around were among the ones I held dearest to my heart and whose opinions mattered the most to me. I wouldn't be able to bear their rejection. I couldn't see the disgust in their eyes.

I was a coward.

'You reap what you sow'. My aunt used to love this idiom. She would use it all the time when I was a child. Usually she would say that when I made something silly and had to be punished for it; like that time I had chosen to paint the walls in my rooms with other colours when I was nine or ten. I wonder if she would have considered poisoning people a 'silly thing'. Probably not. Especially considering our family's past. Yet she would have said that idiom and she would have been right. Everyone has to face the consequences of his actions at some point. Now was apparently the time to face mine.

It was the feeling of Nori still close to me that gave me the courage to look around. I suddenly realized he hadn't jerked away, he was still here, supporting me, holding me. I couldn't even start to put into words how glad I truly was for his silent support. I forced myself to open my eyes, readying my mind for the evident revulsion my friends would surely display. My body was tense and my heart rate quite rapid.

When my eyes opened, they immediately fell on Dís. I gulped. Her face was unreadable. Feeling my breath caught in my throat I quickly glimpsed at Balin, Bofur and Dori.

Bofur was surprised. Simply surprised. But there was something else, another emotion. It took me awhile to recognize guilt. Guilt? Why would he feel guilty? My eyes turned to Balin who looked hurt and regretful. I blinked several times before looking at Dori. He was obviously angry and that made me flinch.

Immediately Nori's arms strengthen their hold on me but I couldn't find the courage to look at him yet, just as I couldn't see rejection from Ori's eyes. My eyes went back to Dís who decided to speak once more.

"Amelia, did any of them die?"

I shook my head but it took me some time to finally be able to voice a very weak "No".

"Amelia, what brought you to this? What did you do exactly?"

Apparently Dís didn't know exactly what had happened in Gorm, I tried to inhale and exhale slowly. It took me several long minutes before I could talk and my voice was barely audible. Thankfully for them, dwarves had good ears.

"I. I can't…Dís I'm. Sorry. So…sorry. I didn't know. Know what else to do. They. They were ter. Terrified of the. The dwarves. Any. Anything could. Could have hap. Happened." I stammered pathetically.

I realized then that Nori was brushing soothing patterns on my arm while still holding on my hand. I chanced a glance at him.

The only feelings I could see in his eyes were concern and worry. No repulsion. No disgust or suspicion.

The weight that hindered my breathing lifted.

They didn't seem to hate me at all. That shocked me more than anything else. It must have shown on my face quite clearly because Dís spoke again.

"Amelia, you shouldn't take it so hard. What you did was…unusual but you saved our kin. You helped them get out of this situation. You did well."

"It. It's not. Not honourable." I hiccupped.

Nori squeezed my shoulders once more and I could feel heat radiating from him. I was surprised to hear Ori speak next.

"Honour is a tricky thing. What is more honourable than protecting your kin by every possible mean?"

I blinked.

Dori patted my knee and I glanced at him. He was softly smiling at me, a proud glint in his eyes. Balin had the same look on his face and Bofur was openly smiling at me too. Dís was more reserved but I could easily see the concern in her eyes.

I felt my brain stop for a second.

Seriously?

Had I been worrying all this time for nothing?

I suddenly felt as if I would never understand the dwarves' logic.

I must have spoken aloud because they all chuckled at that moment and Balin sweetly patted my knee, just like Dori had done minutes ago, before speaking softly.

"My dear, it's easy to understand. We dwarves think that the outmost honourable thing to do is to always protect our kin."

"We stick together, we protect each other. Simple really." Bofur said before adding kindly. "You really did nothing wrong Meli."

"Do not dwell on this Amelia. If anything it shows how resourceful and reliable you are." Dís added with a smile. "I don't think I would have thought of using such a plan myself." She mused softly.

I saw the other nod, approving her words.

I was simply flabbergasted. To think I had worried so much about what their reactions would be. I felt utterly stupid now. I had, once more, overreacted in dramatic proportions. My pessimism and my natural ability to criticize myself had once more been highlighted. I shivered slightly and Nori, who was still sitting on the armchair, brought me closer to his chest. I felt a terribly huge weight being lifted from my shoulder and I could breathe so much more easily. Still, everything wasn't solved and I felt doubts and guilt, but there were some things I just couldn't say aloud to all those dwarves. No matter how much I cared for them, some things were best left alone.

While I was busy sorting out my thoughts, Bofur kept on relating the events.

"You should have seen her too, in that room full of angry villagers. She even managed to scare me!"

At that I felt a blush on my cheeks. I wasn't proud of it. Not at all. I winced and felt a pang of pain in my heart. Dís obviously saw it because she asked Bofur none too kindly to shut it.

"Amelia, we are not judging your actions. No one here is going to scold you, or despise you. Why do you still doubt us?"

Her words struck me and tears welled in my eyes. I didn't even try to stop them from falling.

"Dís" I brokenly tried to say.

They were all observing me, clearly not understanding why I was still so obviously hurt by the events. They were all frowning but I could tell it wasn't from anger; they were merely concerned and curious as to why I reacted so strongly to something that I shouldn't be worried about according to their moral.

Looking at them I felt now maybe was the time to explain a bit more about what was ailing me. Besides, I owed them to at least tell a little bit more about me, about my past. I let my gaze be caught by the fire and cleared my throat while Nori gently rubbed circle with his thumb on the back of my hand. Ori was now holding the second one and he was encouragingly patting it.

"I just…where I come from such acts would be considered against the law. It's very serious. And for a healer to poison people…" I took a deep breath while my heart was racing in my chest. "For a healer to poison people…"

I could see them all completely focused on me when I turned my head to gaze at them. There wasn't any judgement or any disappointment in their eyes, but somehow I just couldn't. I simply couldn't get the words out.

"It's like my… it's…" The words I wanted so badly to pronounce were caught in my throat.

Why couldn't I admit this to my friends? It wasn't such a big deal, not anymore. So many years had passed since those events and I wasn't even in the same world now. Still, I apparently was unable to admit something so painful to them.

"I just…I don't do well with poisoning." I said lamely, feeling utterly defeated.

The dwarves shifted awkwardly around me and they looked positively uneasy and confused. I knew they wouldn't understand what I had tried to say, mostly because I hadn't been able to say it. But at least with the bit of information I had managed to give, they would understand that my moral standards were once more completely different than theirs.

I felt suddenly very tired and just didn't want to talk anymore. Topics I had managed to keep away from my thoughts for so long kept coming back at the forefront of my mind and I just didn't have the strength to fight against them. I wanted to forget my past, but I just seemed unable to do it.

Without looking at my friends, I slowly stood up, and turned away from them.

I didn't really feel the anger and fear anymore, guilt had replaced them thoroughly.

The only thing that mattered was that I had done something that would have been considered terrible where I came from and that I had done it while being perfectly informed of the consequences. I had done it purposely, on my own free will. I couldn't blame anyone but myself, and I was now scared. Scared of myself, of what I could do and might do.

I really had felt too much anger and doubts these past few days and it exhausted me for nothing. I had over reacted once more, and knowing the dwarves didn't dislike me was soothing me greatly, but I now had to deal with things they couldn't help me with.

When I entered in my room, I didn't expect to feel so at ease. This was my space, my little room at the end of the corridor. I looked at the few possessions I had. A few notebooks I had filled with notes of plants and dried flowers, charcoal pencils I used to write because I still hadn't taken the time to try and write with ink and an actual feather pen. Some clothes, dresses mostly, cut in pure dwarvish fashion and in deep colours, blue and purples mostly. Leather shoes, wooden comb, leather bags, wooden bed and trunks. Suddenly, I had the urge to see something else. Something modern. Something from my world. I had to prove to myself I hadn't dreamt my life before I met the dwarves.

I let myself fall to my knees in front of my trunk and rummaged through it, not hesitating to throw my other clothes out of it and around me on the floor. I finally found my hoodie and my old tattered jeans at the very bottom of the trunk. I had cleaned them but had never worn them again after I had arrived here.

I took a shaky breath, holding them in front of my eyes. Yes, those came from my world. I came from another world. A world where poisoning people, was not normal, was not right, no matter the circumstances. I felt my back collide with the cold stone wall as I sat near my trunk, holding my clothes close to my chest.

I was deep in thought when I heard a soft knock on my door. I looked up to see Ori's head looking at me before he came in my room completely. He sat silently next to me, our shoulders barely touching.

"I don't really get it." I whispered.

Ori remained silent, he probably waited for me to explain and develop my thoughts, so I did just that.

"I understand that for you it's nothing big. I understand you believe that what I did was…normal. But I don't really get it. For me it's really not normal. I was so scared Ori. So, so scared that you'd all hate me, despise me."

I shook my head and Ori used that time to put his arm around my shoulder and speak.

"Amelia, I can understand that certain things are different here. And it's probably normal that you feel sometimes…disturbed or upset about those differences. But there's one thing you need to put in your head." Ori said calmly though his tone was incredibly serious.

I looked at him, not surprised to see him looking back. He didn't smile sweetly though, his brows were furrowed in a serious and concentrated pout.

"Whatever act you do that you might think is bad, or wrong, I can tell you that Nori has done ten times worse. And Dori too probably. Actually to be entirely honest, you have to realize that dwarves aren't a gentle peaceful folk."

I snorted, not really amused but simply thinking this was probably the biggest understatement I had ever heard.

"I'm starting to think that all the people living in this world are far from being peaceful and gentle." I said with a sigh and surprisingly, Ori laughed lightly.

"Well, except for a small race leaving east from here, I think you're right."

"Anyway, it doesn't change what I did."

"No, but it should reassure you."

"How so?" I sourly asked.

"Amelia, none of us is ever going to hate you because you did something to help dwarves. Sure, had you been trying to save elves, well that would have been another story. But even then. You didn't kill anybody. It's fine. Besides, I really don't think you could do something that would make Dori or Nori, or me, hate you. We're happy to have you around."

I pondered on his words while tears sprung to my eyes. I was so touched by his words that I couldn't stop myself, though I really wished I would stop being such a cry-baby. I sniffed a bit before engulfing Ori into a tight hug.

"Thanks Ori."

"Anytime Amee."

I chuckled a bit before leaning back.

"Amee?"

"Aye, I thought it sounded better than Meli."

"It sounds amazing Ori."

And with that we ended up hugging each others for a good ten minutes before I asked Ori to tell me what happened during my absence. We chatted rather happily, my worries and doubts put aside for the moment, until I realized that it was rather odd that none of the other two brothers had come to check how we were doing.

"Where are Dori and Nori?" I ended up asking.

"Well, Dori had to go with Balin to review some contracts, and Nori had a few things he wanted to buy at the market."

I simply nodded and smiled at Ori, asking him to tell me more about this peaceful race living east from here. Immediately I could see his eyes shine at the prospect of sharing his knowledge, though he was a bit disappointed to tell me not much was known about these weird folks called 'hobbits' because they lived in a close-knit community and didn't trade with dwarves, at all.

I didn't know how long we spent simply talking about things and others, but it felt so normal, so natural, that I truly did forget my little daddy issues for awhile. It was only when someone knocked at my door that we both looked up and realized we had spent a good part of the afternoon just chatting.

When Nori's unmistakable features came into view, he simply quirked an eyebrow at seeing us sitting on the floor.

"You'll catch a cold sitting there." He just said, slightly frowning while Ori pouted.

"I'm not a child Nori, I'm fine."

"Who said I was talking to you?" Nori replied shrugging, clearly teasing his little brother.

"Wh…what? You're trying to tell me you don't care if I'm sick?" Ori squeaked, apparently doubtful but highly disturbed at the idea that his brother wouldn't care for him.

A slow smile widened on my face as I saw the mischievous glint in Nori's eyes. He glanced at me before answering in a flat tone to his brother's shocked question.

"You always say you're an adult, I'm treating you like one…"

I shook my head still smiling at their antics. Nori loved to tease his little brother, that much had been obvious for awhile, but the fact that Ori always took it so seriously never ceased to amaze me.

"But…" Ori's face was priceless, both shocked and surprised.

Nori chuckled before coming forward and rumpling Ori's hair and gathering him in his arms.

"Ow, come here dwarfling. Of course I don't want you to get sick." He said with a smile while Ori relaxed, still slightly pouting.

"You're mean."

"Aye, I know." He smirked before turning to me. His eyes narrowed slightly and I could tell he was trying to assess how I currently felt. "We just finished preparing dinner, are you coming?"

"You cooked?" Ori and I both said.

"Is that so surprising?" he huffed at us.

Ori and I shared a glance before we both talked.

"Well…"

"Honestly?"

"Yes." We both chorused and Nori shook his head, mock glaring at us.

When I entered the kitchen after Nori and Ori, I couldn't help but gasp at the sight. The table was covered with various dishes. That wasn't unusual per se, but when I saw what those dishes were, I felt another round of tears gather in my eyes.

On the table I could easily see the black pudding cooked with apples, the salads and tomatoes freshly cut with pieces of cheese, fruits, vegetables and I could smell the amazing smell of freshly baked bread. There was some meat too but it was so obvious that this meal had been prepared for me that I couldn't stop the tears from falling.

My heart seemed to swell in my chest and I grabbed the first brother, Ori, in a tight hug.

"You're all so amazing."

I managed to gasp after I released Ori and hugged Nori instead. I felt him pat my back and I had seen the happy yet slightly smug smirk on his face.

"I love you all so much."

I felt Nori freeze in my arms for a short second but I didn't pay attention to it, I was already turning away to hug Dori who smiled softly at me and gathered me in his arms.

"It's nothing Amelia, just a few dishes."

"Still. Thanks."

I happily sat at the table. Dori and Nori had outdone themselves. It was so obvious that the whole dinner had been prepared according to my taste. I couldn't help but grin like a mad person at the sight of all the fruits, vegetables and various dishes. I felt a few tears at the corners of my eyes and I hastily brushed them away, I didn't want to cry anymore.

Those three dwarves were simply amazing.

Nori sat next to me and I smiled at him. My smile widened impossibly when I saw him smirk smugly and wink at me. I couldn't help it, I let a few giggles escape my mouth as Nori started to pile up food on my plate.

Dori and Ori were sitting on the other side and I could see Ori trying to mentally encourage himself. He was clearly not doing so well until Dori put some meat on his plate. We all started eating and I enjoyed the usual silly banter and chatter of the three brothers. They were acting as if nothing had changed. As if everything was completely normal.

And I felt so grateful, so happy, and I thought at some point that my heart was going to simply burst out of sheer happiness.

Looking at Dori trying to bargain with Ori in order to make him eat green food was just plain fun. Nori was softly smiling at the sight too. I grinned at the local thief and he smirked back, obviously relieved to see that I acted normally around them. I gently bumped his shoulder with mine, before eating more than I had in weeks, until I just couldn't even bear the thought of putting food in my mouth.

Being here, with the three of them felt right, it simply felt right. My presence around this table didn't feel odd, I didn't feel like I was imposing. It was at that moment that I first thought that I might have my place around here. It might have been a truly good thing that I had come to this world. It was hard, terrifying and disturbing, but it felt right too. I felt like I belonged around this table. And then I realized that even if some people had loved me in my old world, I had never been so unconditionally accepted. The brothers simply didn't care about what I did or could have done. They only cared about the fact that I was back. They only cared that I was back with them.

And for awhile I completely forgot about why I had been so upset a few hours ago.

* * *

A few hours later had me screaming while jolting awake, in tears once more. It took me several long seconds, a few minutes even, to realize I was lying in my bed. A nightmare. I hesitated between laughing and crying; my mind was becoming rather predictable. Why? Why when I had spent the end of the day smiling, laughing, feeling simply good, why then couldn't I just have a whole peaceful night of sleep? I needed it too. I was so tired. Why was my brain betraying me like this? Why? It seemed so unfair. So weak too.

I sighed deeply, rubbing my forehead with my left hand, trying to calm though my mind was in a frenzied state. I somehow rationally knew that everything was back to normal, but I had this terrible feeling gnawing at my heart, terrifying me and my thoughts kept going in morbid or frightening directions. In the meantime I had heard crashes and scrambles, even a curse, coming from the other rooms and my door bolted open.

Nori and Dori came in first, wearing wrinkled tunics that they had obviously put haphazardly on. Seeing them, my heartbeat slowed down to a less dangerous pace and I felt my arms extend towards Nori on their own volition.

The dwarf didn't even seem to think before quickly gathering me in his arms while sitting next to me on the bed. Dori came to us, putting his hand on my forehead, removing gently the tresses that stuck on my face.

Ori came just a minute later, still wearing his long white cotton tunic I knew were his night clothes. Dori seeing this went to his brother and wacked the back of his head.

"Go put some clothes on!" he chastised his youngest brother.

His serious reprimand about Ori's inappropriate state of clothing forced a small, uncertain smirk on my face.

"Are you alright? Do you wish to have something to drink?" Dori asked me with obvious concern.

Meanwhile Nori was slowly rubbing circles on my back, keeping me close to his chest.

"I'm sorry…" I whispered. "It was just…I'm fine, just a bit..." I didn't finish my sentence.

What did I feel at the moment? Was I scared? Simply uneasy? Ashamed? What scared me most? Whose faces really haunted me right now? Thankfully Dori didn't need to hear the end of my sentence before he answered kindly.

"Alright, I'll leave you then. You need calm, we shouldn't crowd you." He told me before turning to his brother and speaking a few words in Khuzdul.

Nori replied in the same way which really surprised me. I was, of course, used to hear dwarves speak in their language now even though I didn't understand any of it and didn't try to. But the three brothers usually spoke in a language I could understand. It was strange to hear them use it, but I wouldn't even have thought to comment on it.

I saw Dori nod seriously and leave, grabbing Ori who was about to enter the room and instructing him to go back to sleep.

I distinctly heard and felt Nori's sigh when the door closed behind Dori.

I shifted a bit in his hold as I let my head fall on his shoulder, my cheek brushing slightly against his braided beard in an oddly familiar way. I felt his hand slowly caressing my hair and an extremely strong feeling of calm grew in me. I sighed contentedly without realizing it and let the peace of the instant soothe my nerves. Nori at this point had gathered me on his lap and was rocking me slightly while whispering in my ears that it had only been a dream, that nothing was real.

I didn't understand how I could feel better only after hearing him say things that I rationally knew to be right, but didn't accept until he said it.

That was most peculiar and I thought that I should one day talk to him about it.

That night though, at that moment specifically, I didn't really care about all that. I just wanted to feel better and Nori had always been the one since my arrival here, to manage to calm me down and ease my worries after a nightmare.

Strangely enough, while I was apparently unable to tell certain details of my past to all the others, I had no such qualms or problems when it came to Nori. I trusted him completely and even wanted to tell him what was hurting me; I couldn't help but hope and believe that he was the only one who might help me out of my dark thoughts. It was strange. Ori was a great listener and I had often told him about my world, but there were topics we never talked about. It was the same with Dori. But obviously there was something different in my relationship with Nori because I could speak with him freely, completely freely.

I let my eyes close and listened to the soft thud Nori's heart made. This sound combined with Nori's presence was enough to let me feel much better than I had in weeks. Patiently, just like we had done so many months ago and so many times already, I waited for my fears and doubts to ease away slightly before I spoke in whispers.

"My father was a doctor, a healer, too."

Nori's hand froze on my back and his hold on me strengthened slightly.

"My mum, she was a well respected teacher at uni, she taught history. I was seven when they died. It was an accident, but some people told it was my father's guilt who forced him to drive the car down the bridge. Other said it was God, like Mahal, who did it to punish him. Some even said he deserved it. I think, well I always hoped, it was just the fog that was thick that night, the road that was slippery, something like that."

Tears were menacing to fall from my eyes. I could once more see the headlines in the newspaper 'Killer MD kills himself. ' 'Doctor Killer went down.' How utterly stupid. How tacky. Had those people no shame? No sensibility? Didn't they care for the families?

I shivered and felt my stomach churn. I had always hated journalists since those events. They were always looking for catchy sentences in their headlines, never bothering about those it would hurt. I was seven back then, but they had followed me during my whole life. The worst memories linked to those headlines happened during med school, where I had simply been ostracised by my peers because of who my father had been. All my life they haunted me. At some point I even remembered hating my own father for what he had been…before I felt guilty for having those feelings. Still he kept haunting me, even in another world it seemed…

"They died because of the…hem…ca, cal?" Nori asked, obviously searching through his mind for the word I had explained to him months ago.

"Car. Yes. Well, my father did. He had an accident and fell in a ravine. My mom she…She couldn't stand the pain and the…shame. People around, they kept talking and talking about my father's actions. Some kids kept on writing stuff on our car, our door. I don't remember much, but I know that around then, even my grandparents stopped talking with my mum. It was just…awful Nori. People hated us. And my mum…well, she killed herself a few months later."

Nori remained silent, like he often did in those moments, he didn't ask question, didn't remark that I wasn't making that much sense sometimes. He knew I needed time to express my thoughts. I never found out how he did, but he knew exactly how to react, when to speak and when not. This dwarf had a singular ability to understand me and it was both impressive and slightly scary.

"The people. The people thought my parents deserved it. Well not mum, but they thought it was right for my father to die. Just because. Just because my father had…he had killed a few of his patients. Stopped their sufferings really, or well, that's what my aunt used to tell me. These people were so sick and in so much pain, that my father helped them. I never…I never tried to learn more about the events. I couldn't. But people they just didn't want to let me forget about it."

I felt a sudden burst of anger at remembering how people thought that it was normal to keep sneering at a young child just because her father had done something reprehensible. Hell, I hadn't understood at the time. I couldn't defend myself, and even my aunt and uncle…well, they had taken care of me, but they had tried so hard to make me change my mind when I told them I wanted to become a surgeon. At the time I had thought it was because my aunt was still ashamed of her brother's actions, now though I wondered whether they knew how much the people in med school would remember and how they'd behave.

Nori was now caressing my hair, trying to appease me while I found it hard to breathe. After a short pause, I finished the story, knowing that Nori would then know why I had reacted so strongly to the recent events.

"He helped them die. Killed his patients." I paused to take a deep shaky breath. "He used some chemicals I think to do it."

"Chemi…?"

"Like poison."

I gasped, finding it suddenly hard to breathe. Nori's arms tightened on me and he brought one of his hands under my chin, forcing my head back on his shoulder, he then turned his face and gently pressed a kiss on my forehead.

Tears rolled on my cheeks while he started to hum a low tune. He rubbed my back while his other hand was still under my chin and gently moved to my cheek. He kindly brushed the tears away and I felt better quite quickly. I remained silent for awhile, concentrating on his hand still on my cheek, on the low tune he was humming, on his lips that kissed my hair or forehead from time to time. I just wanted to savour this moment that belonged to just the two of us.

I finally felt some peace and calm.

After awhile, Nori had stopped humming and was now simply rubbing my back, his head resting on mine, and my mind drifted to other, less painful thoughts. I let Nori's presence sooth me like it always did. My head was resting against his shoulder and I was on his lap but I didn't feel uneasy or weird. If anything it felt oddly right and peaceful. One of Nori's hands was still on my back while his right one was on my knees.

When Nori decided to speak he didn't startle me, but he did surprise me a little with his words.

"You shouldn't compare your acts with that of your father. The situations were entirely different. Plus, you're not him."

I felt a slight lump in my throat and had to clear it before being able to answer.

"I poisoned people, just like he did. But I'm worse than him. He did it for them, I poisoned those people not to help them, but for me."

"No, you didn't." Nori confidently said.

"You weren't there Nori!" I snapped without really meaning too. "I poisoned those people because I wanted to free the dwarf. Because it would help me. Me, and only me."

"So, you didn't care at all about Balin, Bofur, Dwalin and the others?" Nori retorted tonelessly.

"What?"

"You said you did it for yourself. So it means you didn't care about the dwarves. You didn't even think about them. You just wanted to poison those people."

I had never heard Nori talk like that, so calmly and so much. It was strange, it really was and it befuddled me. Besides, he was speaking utter nonsense.

"No I…"

"Why did you poison these people Amelia?"

I took a second to shift my position and I looked up at him. Nori was staring back at me and I couldn't see any negative feelings on his face or in his eyes. He was waiting, patiently waiting for me to answer and there was such kindness in his gaze that it made my heart swell with warmth.

"I." I had trouble finding my words once more. "I poisoned them so that they would need my help."

"What for?"

"To heal them."

"Amelia, don't play dumb with me."

It felt odder still to be chastised by Nori and I couldn't help but blush.

"Fine, I wanted to trade my skills for the dwarves' freedom." I snapped slightly.

"And did it work?"

"You're the one who's playing dumb now." I grumbled.

"Well, it seems to me that you need it right now." He retorted still calm and collected.

I glared at him before sighing loudly.

"Yes it worked, Nori." I answered exasperated.

"And did anyone died from the poison?"

"No. But I was only lucky that no one died." I was getting annoyed with his little game now.

"So, how can you think that what you did is even remotely close to your father's actions? You're not your father. You're not in the same world. You live here now, what we believe in is clearly different. Let your past go."

I blinked at his words. The annoyance I was starting to feel melted away and was replaced by surprise and disbelief. It seemed so simple to do when he said it like this. He made it sound so logical. Still I knew I would struggle with this for quite a while. And then I strangely felt a little bit of amusement mixed with exasperation at the dwarves' reactions. They were just plain weird.

People around had doubtful moral, or at least had entirely different definitions about integrity and honour than I had. I couldn't even start to accept my actions, they were in contradiction with what I was, what I had always wanted to be. No. I couldn't accept them, but I wouldn't lie either. Right now, I was glad for Nori's dubious definition of integrity.

"It's so easy for you to say." I whispered.

"No, it's not. But I'm only saying this to help you." He answered with a saddened face.

After long minutes Nori decided to break the silence once more and I felt his arms tightened around my waist.

"Stop beating yourself over every little thing."

I didn't reply to this. I knew he was right. Sort of. I had realized that I tended to overreact quite a lot since I came in this world. But to be entirely honest, I wasn't sure how I could change that. This place scared me a bit; it was all so different from everything I had known. It felt sometimes as if I was walking on a small thread and at each steps I was taking the risk to fall to my death.

Still, I couldn't ignore that I had a few dwarves holding my hand and probably ready to jump right behind me if I did stumble.

"Please, I hate to see you suffer like this." He whispered again, and I leant back a bit to look at his eyes once more.

The intensity that I saw made my heart rate waver. I clutched one fist in his tunic and whispered my answer.

"Give me time Nori."

He didn't reply, but after a short minute I saw him nod slightly, our gazes still locked together. I offered him a soft smile then and was happy to see some of his worries and concern fade away from his face and eyes. After he smiled slightly back, I rested my head once more on his shoulder and closing my eyes. Our discussion was pushed away to the back of my mind, because at that moment we had said all that needed to be said about this issue and I just didn't want to think more about it. I felt so at ease here, so safe right then in his arms. I brought one of my hands to rest on his chest and felt the soft thud of his heart.

I was at peace.

For the first time in quite awhile, I was entirely at peace.

We remained like this for several long minutes, a peaceful eternity, and when I half opened my eyes it was only to take his right hand in mine. I let my fingers graze his knuckles and I didn't pay attention to the fact that Nori seemed to tense ever so slightly. I slipped my fingers in between his and looked down at our intertwined hands. Without looking at him I whispered.

"I'm so tired of all those nightmares…I never used to have so many."

"Well, your life did change quite a bit." He sounded like he found it amusing and I slapped his chest slightly before snorting a bit too.

Well he wasn't wrong really, my life did change quite a bit. Every little thing I had thought to be constant and certain had been left behind. Now I didn't take anything for granted anymore, Nori's injury had made sure of that. Still, there were some things that I could rely on. My gaze was still glued to our hands. I looked at how his fingers lightly held onto mine. His hand was so warm against my skin.

"I've missed this. I've missed you." I whispered suddenly, blurting the words out without really realizing it.

I didn't need to speak more nor needed I explain what I meant. The months spent without him by my side had been excruciatingly long and lonely, now that I thought about it. And even after our reconciliation, it hadn't been really the same because I was mostly tending to him. When we were slowly starting to find back this peaceful rhythm between us I had left for Gorm and it had separated us for almost a whole agonizing month. I knew I had missed him, that I had missed the feeling of being in his arms but I only realized how much now.

I felt him squeeze my hands lightly.

"I know…" he said and paused for several silent minutes. "Me too…"

I let my eyes fluttered close for a few seconds and didn't open them when I breathed out.

"I don't want." I needed to take a deep breath before continuing just as softly. "I don't want to go through all this again. Never again."

Once more I didn't need to precise that I spoke about those terrible months where we hadn't even spoke at each other. Nori squeezed my hands some more, his head resting on the top of mine, before he raised his left hand to caress my hair and then my neck, softly brushing it with his fingers.

"Me neither…"

We stayed silent his hand still on my neck, until he turned his head slightly and cautiously kissed my brow.

"Try and get some sleep now, Mizimul."

I perked up at hearing him speak in Khuzdul but he simply silently released my hands, tenderly helped me to leave his lap and lie back on the bed. He gently held and squeezed my hand once more, still sitting near me, before he stood and left without meeting my questioning glance once. I didn't know he would lean heavily on the stone wall after leaving my room. I didn't know he would have trouble to sleep that night.

All I knew was that his words and acts had, once again, helped me find peace.

I lay back on the bed and slowly fell asleep, my skin tingling slightly as I remembered the feeling of his lips.

The nightmares didn't plague me anymore that night…and I woke up without being able to remember what I had dreamed about.

* * *

**A/N: Alright :) First a Huge thanks to Mary and the nameless guest. I was glad to hear that the previous chapter didn't come out as badly as I thought it was. Thanks too for the other reviews, readers, favorites and follows. **

**For this chapter, well first I hope you're all happy with the Ri brothers :) I did add a few last minute scenes (the diner and discussion with Ori) I hope you enjoyed it as much as I did when I wrote it.**

**Second, Yep, I finally decided to give a bit more details about Amelia's parents. Well, to be honest I had decided on this background story almost as soon as I started writing (same moment as when I decided to make her a healer) and later only did I think it'd be "interesting" to force her to poison people...maybe I'm a bit mean...**

**Third I hope you enjoyed the fluff and overall sweetness...I actually hope it wasn't too much ^^**

**Thanks to Sarah0406, she's the one who gave me the idea for the nickname Amee. I think another reviewer used it, but I'm sorry I don't remember who. **

**Well, and I put this in the warning on my profile, and I really wish to repeat it here. Please do not assume that I am in any way trying to convey my personal opinion on assisted suicide. I chose to use this topic for the plot but I do not wish to offend anyone, nor do I wish to take part in any kind of debate on the subject. If you feel offended I can simply said that I'm truly sorry.**

**I'll try and update soon. Early next week I guess. I'm almost done with the remodeling of the next 6 chapters. after that I'll be able to keep on writing :)**

**Next chapter...some more Ri brothers and a surprise...**


	19. On the Road Again

**Everything belongs to JRR Tolkien except for my OC and the plot.**

**Warning...don't kill the author please :) **

* * *

I woke up quite late but didn't lose time, as soon as my eyes popped open I was out of bed, feeling strangely giddy and refreshed. It was most surprising after the awful nightmare I had gone through during the night. I shuddered when I remembered the faces of my past mixed with the accusing glares of the town's people I had seen in dreams. I forced myself to think about something else. I hadn't lie to Nori, I just needed some time to let the shock of the situation ease away. That and to try and sort out my own feelings about poisoning these people.

I stretched lazily and quickly put on some clean clothes before walking to the door. When I opened it I could hear voices clearly coming from the kitchen and arguing. The closer I got to the door, the better I could hear.

"She should be allowed to sleep after this ordeal!"

"I want to talk to her Dori. I want to hear from her too what happened…" The King sounded extremely exasperated.

"You already heard the other dwarves' explanations. Why do you need to hear hers now?" Wow, Nori sounded even worse. "She's tired and upset. She shouldn't be asked to relive through it all once again."

"I just want to ask her what she thought of these people." I recognized the King's voice as he sighed. "She's the one who spent the most time with them; I just want to know her opinion."

"I won't go and wake her now. Come back later." Dori all but groaned.

"I'm not going to interrogate her for Mahal's sake!" The King seemed to get angry now.

I sighed. I just knew that the brothers would be stubborn about it all, even if the King was yelling at them. It would once again end up in an endless and useless argument. And it was just too early in the morning for dwarves to yell at each other. Besides I had heard way too many shouts recently. I just wanted some peace and quiet in order to sort out properly my own feelings. Nori had greatly helped yesterday, but he couldn't wipe fifteen odd years of my life out of my memories just like that. I had greatly suffered from my parents' death and actions and to think I had done something both so similar and so much worse than my father had…

It made me shiver.

I was brought out of those grim thoughts when I heard that both Dori and the King raised their voices. Yep, if I didn't intervene there would be loud shouts soon enough in the kitchen. I sighed, a bit exasperated, couldn't dwarves talk normally? Were they obliged to yell and shout each time they didn't agree with something?

Opening the door widely I saw that the King wasn't the only one visiting us at that time. The others were simply wise or smart enough not to participate in the heated discussion between Dori, Nori and the King. Ori was sitting next to his brothers, the King sitting at his right while he faced Balin and Bofur.

The three silent dwarves were eating peacefully, seemingly not paying any attention to their King and the other two. I wondered how long Dori, Nori and the King would take to realize that they needed not discuss whether I should be awoken anymore. I shook my head and decided not to intervene, if they wanted to yell, that was their problem. Meanwhile I grabbed a plate before taking some of the sausages that were still grilling in a pan. I then simply went to the table, took a seat next to Bofur silently, making him startle a bit before he offered me a warm smile.

The other three were still yelling but Balin leant back to smile at me from behind Bofur's back and Ori offered me a small wave and a sweet smile before the four of us resumed our breakfast. It was somehow amazing to see that Dori, Nori and the King were so taken by their argument that they hadn't realized I was sitting among them.

While I observed them I wondered how much it would take to make them react to my presence. I wasn't surprised to see that Nori was the first one to see me, though his reaction made me chuckle.

I had just finished eating and was looking back and forth between Dori and the King while Nori stood behind his brother, arms crossed, looking positively fierce. For a minute my thoughts seemed to escape my control and I couldn't help but muse about how such a look fitted him. When Nori shifted though, my mind was brought back to the present time.

Then I saw Nori look at me and at first he didn't react, letting his eyes drift over Bofur and Balin before his head jerked once more in my direction. His eyes widened and he jolted, knocking into Dori who stumbled forward.

"Nori what in…"

I smiled at seeing how surprised the three now silent dwarves were. The King though didn't lose time and sat back before staring at me.

"Amelia, I've been told you were trusted by those people. Is that true?"

Well, we couldn't say our King wasn't direct and to the point. Our King…

I felt both my eyebrows rose. Was I thinking about this dwarf as my King? That was most peculiar. I didn't care much for kings and stuff related to politics. So why would I think of him as my King? What did that even mean? It felt natural to think of Thorin's Halls as my home now, was it equally natural to think of our leader as my King? There I went again, thinking of him as our leader.

Unaware of my thoughts, the dwarves glanced at each other in silence, clearly hesitant. They had no idea as to why I had turned mute and it visibly unnerved them. I couldn't fault them for that. In the end it was Bofur who decided to shake me away from my musing. Physically shake me. He did it so strongly too that I almost fell on the floor with a yelp, jolted out of my thoughts quite rudely.

I squeezed my eyes shut as I did fell, but instead of the hard floor, my back met with two strong arms and a hard chest.

"Ow!"

"Hello there, falling for my charms?"

At this new voice I opened my eyes to see brown, mischievous eyes twinkling at me in mirth and a wide toothy grin. He really was the only person I knew who could say something so stupid while still managing to appear rather nice and cute…

"Don't know what you're talking about." I deadpanned while still being held by Kili.

"Do you want me to let you fall?" He tried to sound threatening and serious and I couldn't help to snort.

"Do you want me to whack your head as I promised to do, so long ago?" I retorted just as seriously, though a smirk tugged at my lips.

"Was that when you lost your way in the corridors and I came all the way down to save you?" He replied mockingly.

"Oh…I always thought your brother had saved me and you just tagged along…" I said, sounding as if I was truly shocked.

"Enough!"

The King's voice snapped us back to reality and Kili helped me to sit back on the bench while sheepishly looking at his uncle.

"Sorry uncle…" He muttered.

For my part I decided that staying silent was a good option.

Looking up and around, I realized that Fili was here too, smiling at his brother's and mine antics. Bofur and Ori were smiling happily too, clearly amused while Balin and Dori shook their head, softly grinning too. Actually, the only one who appeared angry, well besides the ever-angry King, was Nori and I send him a questioningly glance which he ignored. In fact, he ignored me and sat back next to his brother.

For my part I stood and offered my seat to Fili while I went to find some more food. I had no doubt in my mind that the younger dwarves would want to eat too. During the few minutes I took to go and grab some more bread, cheese and ham, the dwarves were back to exchanging pleasantries, and here I meant insults, jokes and barbs.

While they so civilly discussed their point of views, I sat back at the table, this time facing the cheeky Bofur. I was now squeezed between Ori and Nori. The youngest brother offered me a wide, sweet smile before serving me some more bacon and sausages. The fact that a simple breakfast could last for hours around here and just melt into lunch never ceased to amaze me.

I was not hungry at all though, but remembering the events of my first breakfast around I carefully decided not to inconspicuously put it in Nori's plate, two wedding proposals already were enough between the two of us. Instead I gently nudged Nori with my feet while observing his reaction with the corner of my eyes. He stiffened at first and I knew he was still angered by something. Still he glanced at me questioningly and I discreetly pointed at my plate, pulling a face to let him know I really couldn't eat.

His anger seemed to vanish from his face, replaced by a soft smirk and a gentle gaze directed at me. I felt glad, truly glad that he wasn't angry anymore, though I really couldn't understand him. He smirked and nodded slightly, making me smile before I turned back to look at the other dwarves. I knew perfectly that the food in my plate was going to slowly diminish in quantities thanks to Nori's quick hands and unending appetite. Besides, there were sausages at stake.

To be honest, I tuned the dwarves' discussion out quickly. I really had heard and seen enough of that stupid town for awhile. Shouts and the sound of my name among them broke me from my thoughts.

"She can't go back there!" Nori snapped.

"I don't see how they'd do anything to hurt Amelia. Besides, this mission is completely harmless. There's no risk whatsoever now the contracts have been signed." The King groaned in response.

"She just came back and you want to send her away to these barbarians?" Dori's incredulous tone was quite funny to witness.

"She might be helpful. She's the one who managed to talk to them after all…" The King shrugged.

"Hem, sorry, but what's this about?" I finally asked.

The King was observing me and soon all eyes were on me. I shifted uncomfortably on the bench, waiting for them to tell me whatever it was they were yelling about.

"We have to send a group of dwarves back to the village."

"What for? We just came back, surely there's no need for more talk right now?" I said, shivering at the simple thought of more talks between dwarves and these men.

"The agreement we signed stipulated that we'd send some items soon as a sign of good faith." Balin started to explain.

"They're acting as if we were the one attacking them." Bofur said shrugging.

I ignored him, not wanting to point out that, hadn't it been for the fact that the dwarves had been caught, they would have indeed attacked the men first. Right now I had to focus on something else and besides, Bofur wouldn't have appreciated this remark.

"I just don't understand why you want me to go now, when you were so against it at first." I simply said playing with a few bread crumbs, looking anywhere but at the King.

"From what I heard, they trust you. You managed to talk them into accepting this contract…" He started before Bofur interrupted him.

"Bully them into accep…Ow!"

I glared at Bofur while he glared at Nori who had thrown him a metallic spoon that hit him square in the middle of his forehead. Nori for his part didn't care much for Bofur's glare and simply drank his ale.

"As I was saying." The King said clearly exasperated. "These people seem to trust you at least bit. And besides they asked for you to come back to check on the people who had fallen ill while you were there."

I startled slightly at that and quickly looked up, staring at the King who, from what little I could tell, didn't seem to know all the details about the mysterious illness. Balin glanced at me and I could feel the other dwarves tense around me. I send a questioning glance at my older guardian and he slightly shook his head. So the King wasn't aware of my deeds. Why? Why didn't they tell him?

I shivered and felt the blood drain from my face. I was forced to close my eyes and, with my elbows propped on the table, I quickly hid my face in my hands. I was utterly ashamed at my own reaction, especially in front of all these men, honourable warriors really, but I couldn't help it. I was far from being able to put everything behind me. From below the table I felt Nori's hand gently squeezing my knee. I caught a glimpse of his concerned face from behind my fingers. I tried to weakly smile at him but didn't quite manage to.

"Can't you see she's tired enough as it is? She already greatly helped those people, surely they can send for another healer. The poor girl was so upset about all the events that she barely slept last night because of her nightmares." I heard Dori snap.

I took a deep breath, glancing at them I saw the dwarves shift awkwardly on their seats. I strangely didn't feel ashamed to hear Dori reveal this information. That was kind of low to use one of the dwarves' weakness here; forcing them to see their actions were making a woman suffer. Dori was a mastermind that much was sure.

I really didn't mind him telling all this. It was the truth and even if it felt slightly awkward to have them all know my weaknesses, it didn't matter much in the end. Still, I decided to intervene. Clearing my throat a bit to catch their attention I spoke calmly.

"I really wouldn't mind going back there." I started before Dori, Nori and Ori protested. "Wait." I stopped their protests. "I wouldn't mind, really. But I don't think I'll be able to go now if you asked me. I need…some time."

"We don't have much time girl. We need to deliver the items now."

"She's telling you she can't."

"No she's telling me she doesn't want to." The King snapped back at Nori. "Her fears are unfounded; the men are expecting us to come, they won't attack us this time. Besides, they didn't attack her. Why are you so scared of them anyway?"

"Thorin, listen, the lass is…"

"No Balin. I don't see any reason why she couldn't go. As I said, it's entirely safe."

Dear Lord, this man really didn't take no for an answer. Who did he think he was?

Oh yeah…

Right. He was the King. It was quite obvious he was taking decisions and didn't like to be disobeyed. I wondered what he would do if he knew about the poisoning, somehow I didn't think it would change anything. And what if I refused to go? Would he consider it a breach in our contract? I remembered the oath I spoke. I did swear to obey him…

Great.

What choice had I left? Yep, none. I had sworn an oath to a King in a medieval era; I couldn't simply ignore the repercussion my refusal would have. I sighed deeply, trying to be rational about this. To tell the truth I didn't fear going back to that town as much as I feared being back there. The real problem I still had to voice was that I didn't know how I'd react to someone accusing me of poisoning. Worst even, how would I react to them thanking me? I knew I'd be as safe as could be with dwarves around, if they didn't get captured again, but they couldn't protect me from my own mind.

The dwarves were already back at shouting at each other and I even heard them starting to yell in their language when the King stood up and banged his large hand violently on the table.

"Enough! Dori, Nori, Ori are you telling me that the girl's fears are more important than our community's lives? And do you actually believe I'll send her without the certainty we would be able to protect her? If we don't send the items and the healer we promised quickly all those talks would have been for nothing. Do you want that? If we break our contract with them so soon who is to say that their hate will not fester and expand to other towns? Who is to say they won't force other men to attack us and stop all trade with us?"

Everyone was silent for a short while before Balin spoke softly, trying to calm his King while clearly still trying to protect me.

"The lass is no delivery dwarf Thorin, her presence might not be required. She already helped more than what was required of her, we should let her stay here and recover."

"She could help the sick and wounded, she's a healer and a woman, they'll naturally trust her more. They already trust her more." The King countered.

"Then can we go too?"

My eyes widened and I looked at Kili curiously. His face was strangely serious; there wasn't any hint of amusement in his eyes, no smirk on his lips. The other dwarves observed him and his brother and the King shook his head before sighing.

"Kili…"

"You said there was absolutely no risk in this mission. It's just a delivery and they are expecting us. Besides if they trust Amelia, don't you think they might come to trust two young and friendly dwarves more than old grumpy ones?" Fili interrupted his uncle and spoke calmly.

I tilted my head slightly. What he said made sense. Both Fili and Kili were charming, and here I didn't mean handsome, though they of course were really that too. But their personalities were easy, they smiled and laughed easily. There was no doubt in my mind that they would be better welcomed than Dwalin for example.

"Fili, Kili" The Kind groaned. "I told you already…" This time I was the one to interrupt him.

"I'm sorry, but what they say makes sense. The villagers would probably be friendlier with friendly people and, I'm sorry Balin but, Dwalin, Hràr and Péri aren't exactly examples of friendliness." I spoke quickly though my tone was even.

"And this town isn't that far. We've been further away when we went with you on hunting trips." Kili added, leaning slightly on the table, eager to hear his uncle's decision.

"I could go with them if you want to." Bofur said before the King could answer. "The town's people already know me and I did participate in the talks."

I saw the King sigh as he rubbed his hand on his forehead tiredly.

"Alright, alright. The four of you can go. You're leaving tomorrow morning. It shouldn't take you more than a week, no delay this time."

Well apparently the decision was made. I was going. No discussion.

When I felt Nori tense next to me I just knew another yelling match was about to start and I didn't feel it'd be productive.

"Thorin, you can't ask her to do that! She just came back for Mahal…" Nori's outburst was sharply cut by the King's angry voice.

"Nori, I tolerate a lot of things coming from you, but that's enough!" He snapped. "She's the one who so badly wanted to go at first."

At that moment I wanted to tear the King apart. I hated how he just spoke to Nori, really hated it. But there was nothing I could say. I was, after all, a mere human living as a ward in his Halls. If he wanted me gone, he just had a few words to say and I would end up out of the massive doors in a few hours. So, instead of lashing out at him, I simply stood from my seat, outwardly displaying calm features and I looked the King in the eyes.

"I'll go. Tomorrow if that's what you want. But if you believe they'll trust me…" I paused and snorted. "Then you're sadly mistaken."

At that I simply left to go back in my room. I could hear them already starting to discuss and finally yell at each other. Would they ever stop? I sat in the corner of my bed, leaning against the wall, with my legs against my chest. I rested my head on my knees, trying to think rationally and clearly about the events.

I didn't want to go but if I refused I had that feeling I wouldn't see the sky in quite awhile. After all if I said I was too afraid to go back to a normally harmless town now while escorted by three dwarves armed to the teeth, then why would they accept me going out on my own or to more dangerous parts?

Besides I did understand the King's logic. They needed to stay in the relative good graces of the men around and not respecting the contract when it had just been signed would not serve them well. After the events in that town they needed to tread carefully with these men, they needed to be diplomatic, whatever the men would say. I wasn't a diplomat, far from it, but at least I wasn't too stubborn and I didn't have this crazy habit of yelling at everyone and anyone when something displeased me. Yep, these bloody dwarves might need someone like me right now. The knowledge I might actually be useful didn't really cheer me up.

I really didn't want to go.

I sighed before perking up when I heard the door slowly creaking open. A small smile tugged at my lips when I recognized Nori's silhouette.

He shut the door closed and silently made his way towards me. Gingerly he sat next to me and gathered me in his arms. I let him do so, and if I were entirely honest with myself, I was glad he had come…and gladder still to be in his arms.

I sighed softly and shifted a bit to bring my arms around his waist, letting my head fall on his shoulder, after he lifted me and helped me sit across his lap.

We remained silent and I simply tried to appreciate the peacefulness I felt each time I was being held against his chest. Feeling his arms around me gave me strength. I could tell he was tense though, and I could only guess as to why. I tightened my hold on his waist and he responded in kind, bringing me closer still against him. I hummed a bit, feeling much better simply with him being there.

He tilted his head to let it fall on top of mine and I let my eyes flutter close.

After awhile, he decided to speak.

"I don't want you to go."

I felt his lips move against my hair, and I hummed, unsurprised by his words.

"I have to."

"You can refuse." He countered.

"Not really. I can't really disobey the King's order. Nori, the King is right. It's necessary for everyone's safety that you respect your part in the agreement quickly and diplomatically. I'm quite sure the men will not be very polite, even after the contracts have been signed."

"Still…"

"Are you trying to convince me that dwarves are famous for being amazing diplomats?"

I leaned back a bit and caught a glimpse of a smirk. This made me smile.

"That's what I thought."

He tightened his hold some more, crushing me against him but I truly didn't mind. My heart seemed to beat stronger but I chose to only concentrate on Nori for now. I didn't like seeing him so concerned and I wanted to sooth his worries.

"I'll be as safe as can be."

"We both know it isn't true." He replied in a groan.

"Nori, what would you want me to do? Remain hidden here forever?"

I felt him shrug and I sighed before talking in as calm a voice as possible, letting my friendly love for this dwarf reign over my growing exasperation; those topics were really too repetitive and those dwarves were really way too stubborn.

"Nori, I respect and appreciate your concern, I really do. But you have to understand I come from a different world where women were quite independent."

"Our world is dangerous, you've seen it yourself." He groaned.

"Nori, I'll never agree, and I really mean never, to be kept hidden behind mountain walls, prisoner in my own home."

I had whispered softly but I knew he had perfectly heard when his arms twitched and squeezed my waist a bit.

"Mizimul…" He breathed before inhaling deeply.

Hearing him use this word again made me glance up but right now we had to discuss other more pressing matters.

"You have protected me so far. You've been here for me all the time. Why shouldn't I wish to do whatever I could to help you?" I softly said before adding. "Help you all."

"Mizimul, I don't want you getting hurt…"

I don't know what possessed me to put my hand against his cheek at that moment. My palm was lightly brushing against his beard while my fingers grazed his cheekbone. I didn't stop to ponder on why I did it though and I spoke as gently and softly as I could, looking in his eyes.

"I can't promise I won't get hurt, but I promise you I'll try my best not to take any risks."

To my surprise he snorted at my words before answering.

"I think I've never met anyone who can so easily end up having troubles than you."

"Oy, I said I'll try." I replied jokingly.

We both laughed softly and it felt damn good to see Nori's worries ease a bit. Gingerly I let my hand fall back and shifted once more before putting my head against his shoulder again. He tightened his hold on me and we remained silent like this for what felt like an eternity. I knew Nori would keep on worrying but at least he wasn't going to bite everyone's head off anymore, or so I hoped.

I had hoped to be able to relax for quite some time in a bath, but it apparently wasn't meant to happen. Nope. Instead, that afternoon I received various presents from the three brothers. Well I say presents but those were useful items they threw in my arms while complaining they wouldn't have time to help me prepare properly for the trip I'll make the following day.

I now had my own leather backpack and a nice brand new bedroll. Nori had insisted on me wearing a sort of light but resistant leather tunic atop mine that'd serve as light armour. Dori and him even bought me a few other weapons and showed me how to conceal them. After a few hours my head was spinning with all their instructions and recommendations and I simply couldn't take it anymore, I looked around, trying to find help.

Ori, the smart dwarf, was observing his brothers' fussing from afar, looking quite smug at not being the one the other two fussed over. I playfully glared at him and he just smirked. The nerves…

Finally I sighed and decided to make them stop.

"Please, stop this madness."

Nori looked up at me. He was kneeling in front of me, hiding another blade in the hem of my coat. Dori was for his part adding another blanket in my bag.

"Please, I really, really appreciate you doing all this but…Nori, stop with that blade! I don't know how to use them anyway and I can barely walk without clinking as it is."

I saw him frown and he was ready to contradict me but I didn't give him the chance to do so.

"I still have the first dagger you gave me. Don't you think it's already enough for someone who doesn't know how to use it?"

He opened his mouth as if to answer, frowned some more and closed it back before finally grumbling.

"Maybe I'll have to teach you how to use those…"

My interest clearly had been caught when he said he would maybe teach me how to defend myself and I really wanted to turn his musing into a promise. But I didn't have time to answer him as Dori spoke instead.

"Amelia, we're just worried." Dori tried to explain and I had to fight back a laugh at the ridiculousness of the situation.

"Trust me Dori, I realized that. But seriously? I don't even remember where Nori hid all the blades and I don't think I'd be able to lift that bag when you'll stop adding spare clothes, blankets and whatnots." I gently chastised them.

At least they had the decency to look slightly sheepish.

"So please, can you both help me preparing for the journey and stop, just please stop, overdoing everything?"

It took us almost an hour to remove the blades Nori had hidden. Seriously how had I been supposed to find and use all those weapons? I swear he had a gift for hiding objects inconspicuously in pieces of clothing. I suddenly felt much lighter, literally much lighter once all blades were gone and Ori laughed heartily when I remarked on it loudly. Nori simply shrugged and huffed.

* * *

Later that evening I lay awake on my bed, I just couldn't sleep. I was anxious about this new trip to this blasted place. I had no desire to find out whether the villagers had understood what truly happened. In my humble opinion, it was stupid to send both me and Bofur back. Though it was true that Bofur had, in the end, made a somehow good impression with his easy-going attitude, and I had been accepted as a human healer, I wasn't certain these people should be trusted.

Turning once more and shifting to find a better position, I huffed in annoyance at my own brain that kept thinking about what could happen and refused to let me sleep. In the end I grumbled and ended up sitting on my bed. Maybe I should try and get something to drink? Maybe that was the solution in order to sleep…

I sighed, exasperated by my own inability to relax and I slowly stood up. I pondered for a minute about whether or not I should put on a warmer robe, but I shrugged and decided against it. It was the middle of the night, no dwarf would come and visit at such a time, and the brothers were probably asleep. And if they were not…well, they had all seen me in those long nightclothes anyway.

Silently I tiptoed to my door and noiselessly walked in the corridor. The kitchen was dark but the open door to the living room provided a little light. The fire was still burning in the hearth. I was about to take a cup when I heard the hushed voices. I hadn't paid attention at first, but now I could hear what I thought to be Dori and Nori and they seemed to be arguing about something. I frowned, wondering whether it was about Nori's unhealthy job again.

I knew I shouldn't have, but I couldn't help but to come closer to the door. I wasn't really trying to be inconspicuous and I didn't feel like I was sneaking on them. I only heard Nori's voice when I went closer to the door.

"…I'm telling you Dori. There's nothing…"

"There better not be Nori or…"

"Amelia? Is that you?" Nori interrupted his brother and I looked at him from the doorway.

Dori had turned quickly at hearing I was here and he looked at me, both kindly and surprised. Nori, on the contrary, stared fixedly at the fire still burning.

"Hey…" I lamely said.

"What are you doing here?" Dori gently asked me.

"I cannot sleep. I just wanted to have some water and I heard you were arguing. What's this about?" I glanced at the both of them and immediately saw them frown.

"Nothing much. Don't worry about it. You should go and sleep now, you'll have a tiring day tomorrow." Dori replied while walking towards me.

Nori was looking at the hearth, still frowning and I found it odd for a moment. But clearly the brothers had been talking about something they didn't want me to know about. They were entitled to have secrets between siblings, I didn't want to pry and I wouldn't.

"Yeah…I know." I grimaced and Dori smiled encouragingly at me.

His smile disappeared when he saw my attire.

"Amelia, you shouldn't walk around without a robe." He chastised and I couldn't help but blush slightly. "It's cold and really not proper."

"Sorry…" I mumbled.

Dori sighed and told me to go grab my robe while he would put some water in a pan. He helped me prepare some chamomile and stayed with me for the time it took me to drink it. I couldn't help but notice that Nori hadn't followed us to the kitchen and I could only hope he wouldn't do something stupid like, for example, disappearing for a month.

"Are you really alright?" Dori broke the silence.

I looked up and shook my head slightly.

"It doesn't matter much what I want or feel."

"It does Amelia." Dori was frowning deeply now, obviously unhappy with my words. "If you really are not feeling well about this, you should say it."

"Why didn't you tell the King about the poisoning?" I asked instead of keeping the exact same track of conversation.

Dori shrugged before replying.

"I don't know exactly. I'm not even sure he doesn't know. Balin probably told him…then maybe he didn't. Who knows about it anyway? Us three, Dís, Balin and Bofur…There's no real need for everyone to know."

I nodded, uncertain about how to feel about his words, but instead of dwelling on this I asked another question that had bugged me during the whole day.

"Why don't you come too? To Gorm I mean. You're all so worried, why not following then?"

"I wish I could." He sighed. "I cannot leave Thorin's Halls right now. Spring will soon allow us to travel to the southern lands and I have to review all the contracts and already start to prepare the deliveries."

It did make sense. Still, even though I appreciated Fili and Kili and was closer to Bofur and trusted all the three of them, I would have felt safer if Dori had been here with me.

"And what about Nori?" I asked sipping some chamomile.

"What about him?"

"Well, couldn't he come too? He's so worried, why didn't he try to follow us?"

Dori sighed and rubbed his forehead tiredly.

"You know what he does Amelia."

"You mean the fact that he's a thief?" I asked frowning too, I didn't thought much of it actually.

"Yes, because of that, I doubt that Thorin would allow him to go deal with men who already barely trust us."

It made sense. It truly did. Why would the King risk everything because of a thief? The answer was simple; he wouldn't take the risk to begin with. As much as I hated to admit it, it was clear that even the King didn't trust Nori much. I didn't like that but I could understand. Somehow I felt as if Nori was tolerated because of his brothers and who his parents were.

It hurt to think about it like that.

In the end I drank the chamomile rather quickly and quickly left Dori alone in the kitchen. As sad as it was, there was nothing I could do to help Nori. I wasn't even sure he would want to be helped.

* * *

The next day I was standing in the large entrance to Thorin's Halls, facing the three brothers once more. Dori was clearly displaying his worries, Ori wasn't much better at hiding his and Nori was a perfect example of grumpiness. I smiled at them, trying to ease their concerns. I hugged them all, each one at a time, not realizing that my embrace with Nori lingered slightly more than the ones I had with the others.

When I left his arms I felt suddenly colder but I brushed it off. I smiled at him and winked to try and make him smirk. It failed but well, at least I tried, right?

"Try to eat vegetables, even if I'm not here." I gently instructed.

That did it, even though he was clearly fighting it I had spotted his slight smirk. I smiled broadly at him while he made a visible effort to remain grumpy.

"The house will feel weird without you again." Ori complained.

"Try and do something to occupy your mind and hands then." It was harder to say goodbye this time and I felt a lump in my throat. I winked at Ori and told him. "How about you draw a map of Thorin's Halls for me? Like this I won't ever get lost."

Ori seemed to blush slightly at my words and avoided my gaze but I didn't understand why he would. I couldn't ask him anything though as Nori spoke.

"Do you actually know how to read a map?" Nori managed to sound doubtful, amused and grumpy. What a feat!

"Oy, I'll let you know that I'm good at reading maps." I replied, crossing my arms on my chest.

"Fine, fine." He slowly smirked. "What should I prepare for you then?"

"Be creative!" I deadpanned and warmth spread in my chest at seeing his wink.

I heard Bofur call me, telling me it was time to go already. I managed not to wince; I really didn't want the three brothers to worry too much about me. I turned one last time towards Dori and his concerned smile didn't ease the lump in my throat.

"Take care of them, alright?" I asked him, my voice turning slightly hoarse.

"I will. Come safely back to us."

I smiled sincerely at that.

"You know, I think I will. I'll come back home soon."

Dori's smile turned soft at my words and he nodded. I needed not say more, he had understood exactly what I had wanted to tell him. For better or for worse I was admitting it aloud now, this was my home. With these last parting words I left, turning away sharply, not waiting to see their looks. I reasoned that the quicker we left, the sooner we'll come back.

I felt a sharp pang in my chest when I walked away. I was missing them already. I had only been there a day and I wanted to spend more time with them. I frowned and was absolutely certain that my face reflected exactly how annoyed and upset I felt at the moment. I ended up walking in silence for awhile, not paying attention to Bofur and Fili who discussed together or Kili who walked a bit ahead of us all.

I was definitely not happy with this situation. I had hoped not to see that stupid town for quite awhile, but here I was, going straight back there. I let my thoughts remind me of the previous nights. Nori had been so nice, so helpful. He had been right too. I had to let go of my useless past. This world was so different from mine, their logic seemed so simple too, but for someone like me it truly wasn't that easy. I would love to be able to just forget my troubles. Yes, I'd love to forget about my past. But it wouldn't work; my past was what made me what I was now.

Somehow, even though I knew my father had been perceived as a failure, I had insisted on becoming a surgeon. I didn't know why and I remembered doubting myself quite a lot during my last year at uni. When I had arrived here, I had accepted to become a healer mostly because…well that was the only thing I knew how to do. That was the only thing I was. And being Oin's apprentice had helped me so much. I had discovered once more this will inside me to be a good person, to be a healer, save people. Could I consider my actions in Gorm to be a part of my will to protect and save people? Wasn't it a bit egoistical to want to save my friends first? Wasn't a healer supposed to treat everyone equally? Was I a failure like my father had been?

After probably a few hours of walking and forlorn thoughts, I stopped suddenly in the middle of the path. My companions immediately stopped too and stared at me concerned.

"What is it Meli? Are you alright?" Bofur asked me with a smile.

"We forgot the stuff we're supposed to deliver!" I said honestly surprised to be the first one to realize that.

To my utter dismay they looked at each other and started to chuckle lightly.

"Meli, we're just delivering some silver vases, plates and the likes to the town's Master. They're in mine and Fili's bags." Bofur explained.

"Oh…"

The dwarves all laughed heartily then and I felt my cheeks redden a little. It was true, I hadn't really paid attention to what Balin and the King told us and the preparations made before our departure. I had been too busy trying to stop the three brothers from fussing too much. Besides I couldn't care less about anything that concerned that disgusting master. I only knew I was supposed to follow because of my healing competencies.

We almost immediately resumed walking and I observed the landscape once more. In a month time the snow had melted a bit, the trees were now deep green instead of coated in white and shiny snow. The mountain, rocks and even the path we walked on were still covered with a white coating though. I couldn't help but enjoy the scenery but after a while I decided that looking at my three companions could be interesting too. I then observed them a little trying to be discreet.

Bofur immediately made me smile. He seemed to be on holidays, what with his hat that flapped at each of his steps, his way of whistling merry tunes and his apparent uncaring attitude about our mission. Fili seemed rather laid back too. He often joked with Bofur, though the blond dwarf clearly paid attention to his surroundings, observing more often than not his little brother.

Kili was quite the opposite. Obviously overeager to do well during this mission, he was looking around us with stern face and his hands close to his weapons. That was seriously starting to worry me. I startled violently when he drew suddenly his sword out of its sheath and then started to prowl toward a large boulder.

I glanced toward Bofur who was still lowly whistling while he waited patiently for Kili to come back to us, declaring very seriously.

"It's alright, there's no danger here."

"Sure lad, sure." Bofur simply answered already walking back on the road.

Fili simply went to put his arm around his brother's shoulder and whispered something to him with a smirk. From Kili's offended reaction, I guess Fili was teasing him for being so tense. I didn't mind though, for it was apparently Kili's very first mission with such a small group and I could understand he wanted to make things right.

A few hours later, I had enough of it all when Kili jumped to the side, sword unsheathed in a swift move for the fifth time already since we had left Thorin's Halls. Each time he startled me greatly and my poor little heart couldn't take much more of the scare.

"Kili, can you please stop being such a fidgety girl and relax a bit!" I snapped.

The part about him being a girl was probably not my best idea but Bofur intervened to smooth the edges.

"Lad, you're scaring her every time you jump like that. There's no need to be so on edge all the time."

"But what if we're ambushed?' Kili asked

"We won't be."

"But what if we are?"

"I said we won't be ambushed."

And there started the second most stupid dispute I'd ever heard, the first being the one about my nickname. Strangely Bofur had taken part in both. I sighed deeply and fell into steps with Fili who, though he was quite serious about being prudent and cautious, still smiled at me.

"Happy to be on the road again?"

"Yeah…Though to be honest I'd be happy never to step in that town ever again." I grumbled at him.

"Well you did spend a month there already. I'm sure the lovely town of Gorm doesn't have much distraction to offer." He replied lightly.

"You'd think so." I snorted. "But wherever there are dwarves, there's distraction I think."

He laughed at that and shook his head. Then he patted my shoulder before replying.

"Aye, dwarves are known for creating amazing distractions. Don't worry though; we won't stay long this time."

"I hope so. Spending almost a month there was more than enough already."

"I heard what you did." Fili said calmly. "Ma told us."

I sighed, it wasn't surprising that Dís would talk to her sons, but I just wasn't sure how to take this; did she mean well or did she warn her sons to be cautious around me? I looked at him and saw that Fili was observing me from the corner of his eye. He didn't look menacing or anything of the like though, he simply appeared rather attentive.

"She made us promise to take care of you. She was angry at uncle's behaviour. She said he was a heartless, stubborn and stupid dwarf." He chuckled a bit at the memory then continued. "She's worried about you, she's afraid you'll berate yourself endlessly for something no one else but you would deem dishonourable."

"I'm not…berating myself. I was worried about how the others would react. In my world, what I did, it isn't something natural or even remotely normal."

"But for us, what you did was a proof of your loyalty and honour."

I snorted at that and shook my head disbelievingly.

"How is it honourable to poison children?"

"It is unusual. That is true. But from what I understood, you did help and probably save the lives of the dwarves." He said remaining calm and seemingly careless, though I believed it was only a façade.

"We can't know that for sure." I insisted rather stubbornly, I'd admit that.

"No, but I'd rather never know for sure. As for my opinion, I think you're a loyal and good person. Too good maybe for our world, I'm afraid you'll suffer because of it."

Strangely when he said 'good' my mind heard 'weak'. At least that was how I felt about it; I was too weak, too helpless for this world. I had to harden and strengthen myself. Maybe that had been what he meant; that I should harden my heart, prepare myself to be obliged to act in similar ways once more.

Suddenly I didn't want to think about all that anymore. It tired me to think about this non-stop.

"Do you think there's much risk for us to be ambushed?" I chose to change the topic not really wanting to become all emotional in front of the young dwarf who was quickly and easily becoming a good friend.

Fili glanced at me and nodded, understanding obviously my need to talk about something else. I realized how serious the young dwarf could be even though he was just as cheeky as his brother. It surprised me a bit to find out that Fili was actually rather thoughtful and serious, despite being very mischievous when he was with his brother. I knew already he was a nice and reliable dwarf, but I had never seen until now his adult side. It was an interesting thing to learn about him and I was glad he let me see it.

"Honestly? I think Bofur's right. This road is used frequently, there's not much risk." He shrugged before adding with a teasing glint in his eyes. "Try to stay close though; we wouldn't want to lose you, now would we?"

"Oh I'm sure there'll be a prince around to come and rescue me." I deadpanned and he laughed.

"We'll probably be able to find one or two of those." He agreed smiling.

"Do you think they'll have white horses and shining armours?"

That seemed to puzzle him and we soon ended up in an easy discussion about fairy tales from my previous world and tales from this land. It was fun to listen to tales of Durin and other famous dwarves and I was happy that Fili liked some of the tales I told him. He particularly enjoyed the Disney story of Sleeping Beauty, but I guess that was mainly because the witch-turned-dragon ended up slain by the prince.

All in all we spent a good time. This journey promised to be entirely different than the previous one. Bofur was clearly the only experienced dwarf but he wasn't grumpy or deadly serious like Dwalin was. Quite the contrary actually. We spent more time laughing at jokes or at Bofur's improvised stories than anything else. I could really start to believe we were just going on a walk, not on a mission. And without me realizing it, these three dwarves managed to make me forget my troubling thoughts for awhile.

Kili after having been chastised had finally managed to relax and was back to his usual cheery self. It was still obvious he wanted nothing more than to prove his uncle that he and his brother were perfectly able to go on missions, but he didn't jump at each moving bush anymore.

Fili and I spent most of the day talking together though, and we had a good time asking each other questions about our lives. The only highlight of our afternoon happened thanks to him too. The idiot asked me how old I actually was, explaining it was difficult for him to guess when humans were concerned. Once I told him I was still twenty five he laughed loudly.

"Oy, what's so funny lad?" Bofur asked then, turning around as he and Kili were walking slightly ahead.

"Did you know that our Meli is only 25?" Fili chuckled while patting my shoulder.

"What? No way! Why did uncle let you go out on the previous missions! It's so unfair!" Kili immediately complained as I blushed.

"Oh, stop it! What are you, twelve?" I retorted at him as he pouted like a child.

"Actually he's 75." Bofur stated simply.

My eyes widened and I stumbled on my own feet before falling face first to the ground with a yelp. Thankfully Fili was close by and had very good reflexes. I ended up in his arms.

"See, told you you'd need a dwarf prince at some point." He teased but I didn't react.

"How…How can you be so old and so…" I blurted out looking at Kili who gloated.

"Handsome? Strong? Smart?" He provided with a toothy and smug grin.

"…so childish."

* * *

**A/N: Huge thanks to all the reviewers :D Thank you again Mary (good luck with your new semester! And really thank you for the kind words, it cheers me up a lot to read from you.), and thanks to the nameless guest too. And thanks to all the new readers/followers and other favorites that were added. Thanks everyone for the support! (that's a lot of thanks...^^)**

**I know some of you want Nori and Amelia to just get together, but please, be patient. I swear they'll come together...Eventually. **

**As for this chapter... I know most of you will be angry that she's away once more ^^ yep, but please don't kill me. . . It won't take long before she's back and I promise some very nice and long chapters with lots and lots of Nori. **

**As for this chapter, well... I did try to keep it light and with still a good part of Ri brothers' action. Still, I wanted to develop a bit Fili and Kili's characters and well... I guess you'll see what else in a few chapters.**

**Yep.. the surprise wasn't a good one (for you all) as it's Amelia's second departure :) But I swear it's all part of a logical plot (sort of). **

**I know that Thorin might appear a bit cranky and antagonistic here, but I always saw his character as a mix of nice and honorable moments with lots of pride, stubbornness and anger...So I'm trying to keep it that way in this fic. besides...he IS the King, so he's entitled to order people around.**

**Well, I'll post the next chapter later this week (I'll try to keep updating every two/three days.) So that means either Thursday or Friday. **

**Thanks for your support! I hope not to disappoint anyone. **


	20. Of Dwarves and Men

**Everything belongs to JRR Tolkien except for my OC and the plot.**

* * *

The first day of our journey went by relatively uneventfully after Bofur and Kili's silly banter and after Kili had stopped pouting about the adjectives I had used to describe him. Late in the afternoon, Bofur decided to camp under large pine trees. There was barely any snow under the trees and we used the dried needle-shaped leaves to light a fire quickly. Soon we were gathered around nicely warm flames. This time it was Kili who disappeared for a while behind the trees and came back maybe an hour later with two rabbits that were thankfully already dead. He immediately handed them to me and I bit my tongue for a minute, trying to stop my rant about how rude it was for him to assume I would cook.

Well, biting my tongue didn't work and soon I was ranting at a dismayed Kili while I quickly skinned and prepared the rabbit in the way Balin had shown me. He shouldn't think that because I was a woman, I would cook for them, as if it were my predetermined job just because of my gender. Fili and Bofur were sitting nearby, both smoking and smirking as Kili seemed a bit lost.

"But, you're doing it anyway…so why do you complain?" He asked stupefied.

I frowned then, realizing he was right. Even though I was currently telling him that there was no such thing as women's jobs or men's jobs, I was currently doing exactly what he had expected me to do; prepare the food and cook it while the men smoked and waited.

"It's a question of principle." I blurted out and heard two snorts before I glared at Bofur and Fili.

That did stop me though and I quickly put the two pieces of meat on sticks Fili had previously cut and cleaned of their barks before I put them over the fire to roast. Even though we had food with us, it was logical that we would instead try to eat fresh meat and keep the dried one in our backpacks for emergency cases.

During that evening, Bofur decided it'll do us good to keep watch and I was given the last one, simply because I was the only one unable to discern how much time had passed with the movements of the stars.

"Even you can't miss the sun rising." Bofur had bluntly said with a smirk.

I chose not to get offended, though I really wished to whack him at the time. Yet even I could admit that my internal clock was probably as good as my natural direction sense. Besides I was quite happy to be trusted with such a thing. During my first travel to Gorm with Balin, Dwalin and the merchants, I hadn't even been offered the possibility to do it. The dwarves had either assumed I wouldn't want to do it, or that I wouldn't be able to do it. In any case it would be my very first watch that night and already wondered how it would go.

As Kili settled on a boulder for the first watch, I lay down on the ground, under a tree and on a soft mattress of needle-shaped leaves that provided a nice alternative to sleeping on the rocky and cold ground. As I lay there, watching the sky through the branches of the tree, I took a moment to simply appreciate the calm of the forest. I wasn't happy about going back to that village, I was a bit upset about leaving the three brothers behind once more, I was still anxious and nervous about the poisoning, but that night, I just let it all go for a few delightful minutes. For a short time there was just me, lying on the floor in my warm bedroll, the forest around and the endless sky.

Well that lasted for all but a few minutes really as a weird noise brought me out of my reveries. I could hear Bofur's loud snores and they seemed to completely occult the noises nature could have made. I smiled and softly drifted into sleep, tired after a whole day of walking.

When Bofur woke me, the night was dark and the fire we had built was barely lit.

"Wake up lass, your turn now."

I resisted the urge to grumble and had to think hard in order to remember that I was glad I was allowed to do such a thing as keeping watch. I wanted to sleep some more. Just a few more hours, surely that would be fine? Well no. I had duties. Being torn away from my warm bedroll was pure torture as I felt the crisp air of the night. I shivered and hastily fastened my warm coat before walking towards the embers of the fire and trying to catch a bit of its warmth.

"Do you have any idea how to keep a watch?" Bofur whispered after following me to the fire.

"Well…I sit and…watch?" I yawned, uncertain of the correct answer.

He chuckled and shook his head.

"You have to keep yourself occupied, do something with your hands to keep your mind awake. Listen to the sounds around, don't hesitate to stand up from time to time to wake your legs and muscles, and warm up a bit but don't go away from the camp. Never. If you start feeling too cold, walk, jump, do whatever you want to keep warm. Alright? "

I nodded, serious, and was already trying to think about what I could do to stay awake. Thinking about Ori's gift, I smiled to myself, now seemed a good time to continue writing in my notebook. I was slowly starting to feel warmer thanks to the fur in my coat and the multiples layer of clothing I was wearing.

"If your instincts start to kick in and tell you something's up, come and wake me. Don't hesitate. I'd rather be woken up because of an owl than because a fight started and I was asleep. Understood?" Bofur continued.

"I promise I won't hesitate. I'd rather you mock me during the whole trip than have us all dead because I didn't feel like waking you up."

"Good." He said before adding with a softer smile. "Don't worry lass. This area is quite safe really."

"Quite?" I asked, smirking.

"Aye, you can't ask for too much. Besides, it's part of the fun of any journey." He walked to his bedroll when I asked.

"What is a part of the journey's fun?"

"The uncertainty"

On those motivating thoughts he turned his back to me and was soon snoring happily once more. It was quite impressive, really, to hear them all snore so loudly. I wondered whether the sound would scare animals away.

I stood up from my seat near the fire and walked a bit around the camp to warm and wake my body a bit. Dori and Nori had given me a nice fur lined coat and leather gloves to wear on top of woollen mittens. Ori had also gifted me with a thick and warm woollen scarf. All in all I really was far from freezing, still the air had this crisp quality that forced me to rub my nose when I felt it go numb.

I rummaged through my bag to pick the notebook given by Ori and decided to lean against a fallen log close enough to the fire for me to see its slightly yellowy pages. At first I didn't even think about what to write, I just looked through the previous entries, reminding myself what I had felt during the previous month in that town. I hadn't written anything related to the poisoning though, and honestly I didn't plan to write about it at all. Maybe I should have used the time I had now, being alone in a peaceful area, to try and think about these events, but I didn't feel like spoiling the calm of the night with such thoughts. My hand picked up the pencil I had left between two pages and I wrote about Bofur and Kili's quarrel. About Fili and mine discussion, about my surprise at hearing Kili's age and mostly I wrote about Bofur's advices and what I felt like during my first watch ever.

Which truly was nothing much, because nothing really happened…

The night was peaceful and the cold air kept me awake. The sounds of wildlife were muffled by the snow coating the mountains' rocks and the forest around was silent too. Everything felt incredibly calm and hadn't I had Ori's notebook, I would probably have been fast asleep half an hour after the beginning of my watch.

I had thought it would be stressful, it was actually quite boring.

Not even an owl hooted to startle me.

The hours passed slowly, painfully so, and I ended up watching the stars and thinking of home. And by home I meant Thorin's Halls. My thoughts about my previous world were becoming few and far between, the good memories fading in my mind to just be that, memories. I had given up the idea of ever going back there, I wasn't even sure that if I had the possibility to, I would leave this place. Despite the hardship, the difficulties, I had found here something I never had, and probably never would have, in my previous world; companionship.

I tore away from those thoughts and looked up.

As the sky started to lighten at the horizon, I decided to go and wake the three sleepyheads who were still snoring. I was bored and wanted nothing more than to start again with that day's journey, even though I wasn't really eager to be back in Gorm.

"So, that first watch?" Fili yawned in my direction immediately after he sat up on his bedroll.

"What of it?" I asked while putting some log in the fire and water to warm in a pan on top of it.

"Weren't you too scared or worried?" Kili enquired rubbing his eyes like a child would.

"Are you joking? It was just boring. Really, really boring. I have been thinking about faking worry and wake you all up so that we'll have an early start. Be thankful I didn't, or we'd be far by now." I ranted, smiling to let them know I was joking.

"Pay up lads, told you she was a tough lass our Meli." Bofur said, laughing while both Fili and Kili grumbled.

"You put bets on me?" I was astounded.

"Yes."

They answered in a chorus and I narrowed my eyes at them, at Bofur specifically who was now happily bouncing a small clinking pouch in his hand.

"What?" He smirked at me.

"Bofur, I want a share of that profit made on my name. If you don't pay up, I swear I'll go to both Balin and Dori. I'm sure they'll find something in their contracts with me that allow them to beat you to a pulp if you don't pay me my share."

Kili and Fili stared at me wide eyed while Bofur let a loud bark of laughter. To tell the truth, I wasn't sure why it mattered to me but it felt incredibly unfair that they would earn money thanks to me and not share the profit. Well, even if it wasn't thanks to me exactly, still, I had been the object of the bet and only for this, I deserved some payment. Bofur laughed for a long minute before he reached for the pocket in which he had put the gold that had just been earned. I saw a glint when the piece of metal caught a ray of sun and startled a bit when Bofur threw me two coins that I struggled to catch.

"Here lass, for your cheek only. You've got the mind of a dwarf, if nothing else."

"Oy, I resent that!"

We all laughed together and I happily pocketed my money, feeling cheerful just because it was my money. Not Nori's or Dori's or Ori's. Mine. Alright it hadn't been earned through hard work but still, those were my very first silver coins.

They all chuckled at my obviously content and smug face and that day started with everyone in a good mood.

It was fun being outside with Bofur, Fili and Kili. The three of them enjoyed bantering together and most of all they loved to bet about anything which promised a lot of money exchanges during the journey. And I wasn't the last to bet.

At the end of the third day, when we came in sight of our destination, I had five silver coins in my pocket and even a gold one.

I wasn't half bad at betting and the other had even agreed I'd make a good dwarf if I kept on like this.

* * *

It was early afternoon when we arrived in sight of the lovely, oh so lovely town of Gorm. The fields around were just as muddy as I remembered and the houses looked just as dingy as they had before. I sighed at the sight, already thinking about when we'll be leaving. Would it be polite to just throw the objects at the master's face and then run away? Well, probably not. Especially not if I was supposed to check my previous victims' health… I managed not to cringe at the thought, which was an exploit, and calculated that we probably would have to stay around until the next day at least.

When we entered the town, I immediately felt that something was amiss. I managed to catch a glimpse of some people I could recognize but none of them moved toward us. If anything they ran away quickly, entering their houses and closing the doors. Were we back to this now? It didn't make sense. I frowned and started to feel uneasy. These people knew we were supposed to arrive, they knew I was supposed to be here too, though they really couldn't see I was here under all the layers of clothes I had. Between the large scarf and my purple hood, only my eyes were visible. Still they shouldn't have reacted in such a … terrified way.

It didn't make sense…

We were approximately halfway to the master's house now and still no one had greeted us. Only then did I realize something new. There were several men around who observed us with dark glares and had overall a different appearance; they were wearing dark leather clothes that, though they were dirty too, seemed in a slightly better condition than the peasants' garments. I tensed when I saw that they also had swords and other weapons. I frowned and was suddenly really anxious to leave this place. The villagers had no weapon; they had used pitchforks the last time.

I saw two of these men gesture harshly to a family to go back inside their house. These newcomers looked healthier and far more dangerous than the town's folks. They didn't seem to belong here at all and I couldn't remember ever seeing any of them before. My instincts were screaming at me to run at their sight.

I didn't know whether they had sensed my anxiety or whether they simply reacted on instinct too, but the three dwarves suddenly stepped closer to me, circling me, Fili's and Kili's shoulders touching mine. Bofur was just a step ahead of us.

I nudged Bofur a bit and said in a whisper.

"Bofur do they look…normal?"

I didn't need to precise that I was talking about the weird, dark clothed men.

"Not really, no…" He answered lowly and I barely managed to hear him even though the whole town was eerily silent.

"I don't like them." I added glancing at a very tall and scary looking man.

"We don't either." Fili whispered too.

"We do our business quickly and leave in the hour." Bofur decided, clearly dismissing the fact I was supposed to check on the sick people. "Lads, keep close to Amelia."

Both Fili and Kili nodded and I could see the deep frowns on their face and the tension in their shoulders. The fact that Bofur had just used my name, and not the nickname he'd chosen for me and used incessantly in the past days, was quite informative as to the seriousness of the situation.

Now wasn't the time to joke anymore.

Between my thoughts and observations of the people around, we had arrived to the large house that belonged to the master without me noticing. Bofur quickly climbed the stairs two by two and we followed. It took me just a brief look above my shoulder to understand something was terribly wrong.

I discreetly put my left hand on Fili's forearm and squeezed it to gain his attention and he sent me a questioning look. Turning my head a bit I simply glanced behind me once more when I was sure he was observing me. I felt him tense under my fingers, knowing perfectly he had peeked around and registered the same information I had.

The women, children and even most of the men had all but disappeared from the streets and the only men left had been gathering in a loose half-circle that was slowly tightening around us and the master's house. I could tell there were a small dozen of them. Unsurprisingly they were the ones with weapons and wearing the dark clothes.

I shivered.

Something was terribly, terribly wrong.

I heard Fili mutter something in Khuzdul and knew from their tensed shoulders that both Kili and Bofur had understood the situation. Fili moved down one step, imperceptibly placing himself behind me and I knew he was ready to push me away if something were to happen; meanwhile Bofur was knocking at the closed door, waiting for someone to come greet us.

I concentrated on the feeling of Nori's cold and hard dagger pressed against my calf, in my right boot, and it calmed my mind a bit. Somehow I hadn't expected to potentially use this blade against men. It would never have crossed my mind that I might have to defend myself against people; I thought if I ever were to use it, it'd be against some wild animal. I knew that I should have prepared myself for this, after all my experience so far with men of this world wasn't really positive. Right now I wondered whether I would have to actually try and defend my life with such a small blade. I clenched my teeth, I wasn't stupid, if a fight started, I'd die or be captured as soon as my friends wouldn't be able to defend me. I had no illusions about this.

The door finally creaked open and a tall, thin and creepy man looked down his nose at us. I usually already hated how men appeared gigantic compared to us but this one was worse; he was taller than most men around, I could tell, and there was something about him, that made my instincts scream. He had dirty, brown hair and his nose had been broken and badly reset. The worst part of his face though was the long scar that marred his cheek and cut the corner of his lips, forcing his face into a disgusting, fiendish one sided smirk. I shivered at the sole sight of this man.

"What business do you have here, dwarf?" He asked in an incredibly hostile tone though I saw him smirk.

"We're here to see the master of this town. He requested a delivery of some of our products." Bofur answered evenly.

"The old master's dead. You're dealing with me now."

A sense of imminent danger crept in me and I held my breath. Something was wrong here, definitely wrong. Then I realized that the hate I saw in all their eyes was the kind you directed towards enemies. Did these men think we were enemies? It didn't make sense, did it? For my part I had never met them, and from the look of it, they didn't know Bofur, Fili or Kili either. Besides we weren't doing anything wrong, we had just come to uphold our part of the contract.

"That's unfortunate." Bofur replied calmly, impressing me. "If no one else wants to buy the items, then we'll be leaving now."

He was about to take a step back when the creepy man's voice stopped him.

"No. No you don't, thief."

I blinked. What did he just say? Why did he say that? The smirk he sported was simply frightening and I wondered whether he was mad.

There was no time to question his words, for as soon as he had pronounced them he unsheathed an unfairly long sword. Bofur, Fili and Kili jumped into action.

We were still in the middle of the stairs but I was now crushed between their backs as they were each facing different directions. I hadn't even had the time to register that they had unsheathed their own weapons.

"You think you can best us dwarf?" The man sniggered darkly.

Bofur's hammer was directed to the creepy guy upstairs, while Kili now held one long sword, well long for a dwarf, and Fili had one sword in each of his hands. The men had taken a few steps back at the sight of the weapons, but it was quite obvious they were still planning on fighting us. I should say that the three dwarves looked incredibly fierce and deadly serious, had I had the time, I'd have felt impressed, really.

At the moment though, my mind was busy with other matters; I was trying to count how many of them there were when Bofur whispered to us.

"When they attack, Kili I want you to take Amelia and run outta here."

"I won't leave you…" Kili started to protest voicing my own thoughts in the process.

"You take her, protect her and that's final lad." Bofur snapped, still whispering.

"Do it Kili. It's our duty to protect her first, brother. We promised."

Fili's whisper was apparently enough to make Kili obey, for when the men decided to spring into action, Bofur quickly managed to push the man we'd talk to down the stairs before yelling something in Khuzdul. For my part I had just enough time to register that the horrid man wasn't blocking the door anymore. I didn't even attempt to follow what Bofur and Fili where doing, and didn't even realize that Bofur was talking to Kili and me while fighting off some men who were trying to attack us.

I was astounded and my brain apparently wasn't able to comprehend what was happening around.

I heard the older dwarf bark something in my direction but I was frozen. The order had barely left Bofur's lips though, that Kili was turning away from the men coming at us. He grabbed my wrist with his left hand and ran upstairs with me, forcing me to follow him and rushing me through the door, straight to the back of the house.

I was on autopilot, entirely unable to process the information provided by my brain.

Fili and Bofur were shouting in Khuzdul, I could hear the sounds of metal clanking violently against metal, I could feel Kili's hand squeezing my wrist tightly, I could feel my legs move and my heart beat wildly. But it was all so surreal that I ended up just following Kili like a puppet. He rushed me straight through a long corridor towards the back of the house, kicking a door open with his foot.

In a matter of seconds really, we were in front of a window that was facing empty fields and a bit further away a pine forest. Without hesitation, Kili broke the window with his elbow, sheathed his sword back in its scabbard and jumped on the windowsill, turning to offer me his hand.

"Quick Amelia, we need to jump down."

I took his hand and obeyed simply because I was currently unable to take any decision on my own.

We both jumped together and I fell ungracefully on the ground, feeling incredibly grateful that I hadn't broken my ankles after that jump. I didn't even have the time to shake myself away from my stupor before Kili's hand was already on my wrist. He pulled me up to my feet with a quick tug on my arm before breaking into a mad run in the direction of the forest.

We crossed the field, stumbling on the uneven ground, leaving the battle shouts far behind us. Kili directed us to the forest and soon we were slaloming between trees, jumping over fallen logs, avoiding bushes and boulders covered in slippery moss. My back pack was hitting my waist at each bounce, sending shards of pain up my spine every time something hard in it would dig in my back. My heavy coat and warm scarf were now more hindering than helping. My lungs burnt like they had never burn before, my legs were not faring much better and my heart rate was skyrocketing. Kili ran fast, much faster than me, and I knew I was slowing him down. Still, he never let go of my wrist and kept balancing me every time I stumbled. Hadn't it been for him, I would have fallen numerous times.

We ran for a long time, it truly felt like an eternity, my wrist still in his hold and when Kili decided we were far enough from town he slowed our pace before we finally stopped. I was out of breath, taking large gulps of air into my lungs. My legs were burning and trembling while my feet were in a really poor state. Nausea kicked in too at some point and I had to concentrate in order not to be sick right here and there.

I let my bag fall on the ground and jerkily untangled my scarf from around my neck before I bent in half, trying to catch my breath. I pressed my hands on my knees, willing the shaking of my limbs to stop.

Nothing was worse though, than the fear in my heart and the pain I felt at the thought of our friends we had so cowardly left behind. I squeezed my eyes shut, desperately trying to stop tears from gathering in my eyes, still I could feel that some of them ran down my cheeks.

After a few minutes with only our heaving and panting to break the silence around I finally looked up at Kili.

I'm quite sure both our faces reflected perfectly what we were both feeling; astonishment, pain, fright, a touch of despair and a big dollop of guilt.

Kili was pale and his eyes were displaying how difficult it was for him to process the situation.

On my part, I was finally starting to put the events in order and analyze them. Facing Kili who remained silent I decided to speak but he beat me to it.

"What was that?" he whispered disbelievingly.

I had the feeling he didn't really see me right now. He raised one of his hands to his forehead and I could see he was entirely unable to process what had happened, what was happening. Honestly I wasn't doing much better.

"Kili?" I managed to breathe out between two gasps.

He didn't answer but I insisted, I had to bring him out of his torpor.

"Kili, we can't stay here, we've got to do something. Kili!" I didn't dare to shout, what if those creepy people had followed us and were trailing us now? I glanced around, fear growing tenfold in my heart.

I shook my head, I was entirely unable to tell whether anyone had followed us. Looking at Kili I winced at how unresponsive he was right now. In the end I had to slap him in order to wake him out of his daze. He finally looked at me and I muttered an apology before asking him.

"What do we do now?"

"I don't know. It's Fili. It's always Fili who … Oh Mahal Fili, my brother … Nadad… Nadad…" He whispered forlornly.

It broke my heart to see him like that. It broke it even more to think of our friends. I felt my eyes burn and I just knew I had to concentrate on something really quickly or I'd end up sobbing on the ground. I swallowed thickly and clenched my fists. Both of us needed to gather our wits or this would end badly for everyone. Kili was hiding his face behind his hands, whispering his brother's name in a broken hearted litany.

"Kili!" I snapped. "Focus!"

Finding him looking so broken, so lost, I felt my chest constrict. Apparently having to run away while his brother fought to protect us wasn't something he accepted easily. I really couldn't begrudge him for that. Actually I could easily understand it and empathise. It felt already awful for me and Bofur and Fili were just my friends, not my family. I squeezed my eyes shut for a second. It hadn't been hard to understand that they had ordered Kili to take me away for both our protection. Kili was the youngest, and was one of the heirs, one of the two brothers had to survive and remained free and I couldn't imagine Fili running away, leaving his little brother to fend for himself.

I turned away and blinked back tears. Fili was the kind to sacrifice everything for his brother and I simply couldn't think about what might have happened to him and Bofur. I didn't even want to believe they might be dead right now.

They couldn't be...

They couldn't!

Swallowing back the large lump in my throat I faced Kili once more and found him sitting on the floor, head hidden behind his large hands.

I kneeled next to him and pulled him in a tight hug. We clearly both needed it at that moment because he hugged me back as tightly as I held him. Trying to calm my nerves I forced my mind to display thoughts of a warm home with plush carpets, comfy wooden chairs and laughs, lots of laughs. Then I thought about a warm chest and strong arms that held me when I was afraid. I really missed Nori right now. I wished he was there to tell me everything would be alright.

I let my mind fill with thoughts of him. What was he doing? Was he off to search for those items he had been looking for? Was he still in Thorin's Halls? I wished he was there right now; somehow I was certain he would know what to do. I was sure Nori would already have dozen of plans right now; he was a dwarf and a thief, surely that was a deadly combination.

The cold and hard blade I could feel hidden in my boot was strangely soothing; it was a little part of Nori. Clenching my teeth for a minute I took my time to calm my own reeling feelings and clear my mind. I needed to focus if I wanted to analyze clearly what had happened.

The men had looked angry, hateful and different. They seemed to believe that something was our fault. The creepy man had been the first one to attack, signalling the right moment to the others who had waited until then so he quite obviously was the chef of the group, the new town master too. I absentmindedly wondered whether they had knowingly set a trap to attack us or if they had just used the opportunity. Were the men around so hateful of dwarves that they would hire people to kill us?

I freed Kili from my hug and frowned before asking him.

"Kili, these men, did they look normal to you?"

Kili seemed puzzled by my question, clearly not understanding why I would ask such a thing when two of our dearest friends, one being his brother, were potentially dead.

"Kili, please answer. I've basically no knowledge about this world. Did these men look like normal villagers would? Did they act normally for peasants?" I highly doubted that they were peasants, but I really wanted, no needed, Kili to confirm it.

"No, well, not really." He stuttered before developing a bit more. "They didn't look like farmers, that's for sure. Farmers around here don't really use forged weapons."

"So you think they aren't from around here?"

"I don't know." Kili frowned. "Probably not. They were trained and clearly organized. Peasants don't fight like that."

I frowned some more, feeling like I was onto something with the trail my thoughts were taking. Still, something was lacking. There had been something fishy going on in that town and the words of that man were not the only odd thing I had noticed. But as Kili said, these men were trained. Had they been called by the town's people after the town's master death? Had they planned all along to attack us? Had they only acted as if they were interested by the contract?

"Kili, where do town's people find money?" I asked him.

"What? I don't care about…" Kili angrily replied.

"Kili, please, it's important. Answer me."

He glared at me before snapping his answer.

"I don't know. They probably sell a part of their production, trade furs and leather. This kind of stuff…"

"How could they…" I let in a whisper not finishing my sentence aloud.

Kili sent me a questioning look, clearly not understanding what had me so puzzled and perplexed.

"So, could they have been hired to attack us…how much would it cost to hire such people?" I wondered to myself before turning once more toward Kili. "Kili didn't you think the town's folk looked weird too? Scared? And the…" I couldn't finish before he snarled.

"Why would I bloody care about that Amelia?! I'll burn their damn town down to ashes if I could!" His anger exploded in my face. "They bloody killed Fili! They killed my brother…"

His sudden fury left him almost immediately and the sob that shook him then broke my heart. I hugged him tightly once more, tears in my eyes and quickly whispering.

"Kili, I really don't think they killed Fili and Bofur. I might have an idea as to why they attacked us."

Kili pushed me away, holding me at arms' length, his hands on my shoulders.

"What?"

"Remember how they looked like? How you said that they were probably not peasants? And I really can't remember seeing any one of them before. Would it be so far-fetched to think they are some kind of mercenaries? They called us thieves…maybe the peasants thought we were stealing their money. Maybe they thought our prices were too high?"

"The trades were legit. The prices are really low and we barely gain anything from our sales. They really had no reasons to…" He defended.

"Kili, I know that. Well, I didn't know per se, but I know we're not thieves. But remember the words of the man."

"What are you trying to say?" Kili frowned.

"I'm starting to think these men believe we unfairly stole their money. And I don't believe they killed Bofur and Fili because it'll be in their best interest to use them as hostages and ask us to pay them if we want them back." I quickly whispered.

"What?" He looked completely lost then.

"Kili, they'll probably ask for ransom. These men were probably hired, but I guess hiring so many of them cost quite more than buying some tools from us. The only way they would manage to earn some money is by stealing the products we delivered and using the dwarves as hostages."

Kili stared at me wide eyed. His eyebrows knitted in a deep frown and I stayed silent, giving him the time to think about my words. I couldn't say I was a hundred percent sure I was right, but considering the situation and Kili's words, I thought my logic was sound enough.

At any rate I was hoping I was right simply because I didn't want to even start to think about the consequences if I wasn't.

The simple thought of them both being… No I couldn't bear it. Even the simple thought of them being … my stomach churned violently and I had to focus on Kili to try and forget my anxiety.

"You, you really think they're both alright?" Kili sounded like a child at the moment, clearly not daring to hope but unable to accept what could happen if he didn't hope for the best.

"I'm not sure Kili. They might be hurt, because I don't think they'd let themselves be caught without a fight. But I really think there's a possibility they're at least alive."

Kili nodded, not really cheered up by my uncertainty.

"Those men didn't look like they belonged." I whispered trying to convince both myself and Kili that my theory was sound.

After a few minutes, Kili spoke too, frowning deeply and obviously trying to analyze the events.

"You're right. They looked more like mercenaries than town folks. They had forged weaponry too, those are expensive and this town has no forge. They came from elsewhere."

"So then it's really likely that the town folks hired them to trap us?" I wasn't really cheered by the news.

Even the prospect of my friends being alive, though in the hands of mercenaries, didn't lighten my mood. I felt my heart drop to my stomach, what could two of us do against trained mercenaries? What could a young dwarf and an untrained, helpless human girl do against a dozen well trained mercenaries?

"Probably." Kili forlornly answered before frowning. "But why would they hire people if they already have not enough money to pay us?"

Kili repeated my previous thoughts but right now we were both in such a state that having trouble to think in a logical and straight way was almost normal.

"Maybe they'll be paid after…" I didn't have to add after what exactly they'd be paid. "In such a case, then my idea that Fili and Bofur would be alive is almost certainly right. They'd need the ransom to pay the mercenaries."

We both looked at each other and I just knew that the lights of hope shining in his brown eyes were glinting in mine too. Yes, with this theory we could really hope that both Bofur and Fili were alive. I'd rather believe in that than think about what else might have happened. After several minutes I shook myself out of the torpor I seemed to keep falling in.

"So. What do we do now?" I asked once more.

"I'm not sure, I'm…usually Fili…" Kili lowered his head, whispering brokenly again.

I put both my hands on Kili's cheeks and forced him to look me in the eyes once more.

"Kili. You're not alone in this, but you are the one in charge. I can't really take any decisions; remember this isn't my world, I might have adapted to life in Thorin's Halls, but this is beyond my competencies. You're the one who knows most about mercenaries, weapons and fights. You can do this. Fili needs you to do this. Bofur needs you to do this and I need you to do this too. We all trust you Kili and I'm sure that the two of us can find a way to rescue them."

I honestly wasn't as confident as I tried to appear but right now, Kili didn't need me to voice my fears and doubts. He visibly gulped and took a deep breath. He opened back his eyes after having closed them for a minute.

"Alright" He sounded much more confident right now which lifted my spirit. "First we need to know where they're being held prisoner. We have to find out a place to hide too, they're probably going to hunt us down."

"We have to get more information. Maybe this can be solved diplomatically. Is there another town nearby enough where people could maybe help us?"

"I wouldn't risk it. Men will not side with us. No one ever sides with us when we have problems; they only know how to come to us when they need our help or our talents." He sounded extremely bitter.

He was probably right. Men around didn't really express much patience and kindness towards the dwarves. I had witnessed it firsthand, but now wasn't really the right moment to ponder on this. I was quite certain that whatever we planned, we couldn't actually do anything until we either had information or someone working for us inside this town.

"We need information from the inside of that blasted town." I insisted.

"I'm telling you, no one around here would help a dwarf in need. They'd catch us and deliver us to these peasants before we even have the time to open our mouths. They don't help dwarves. No one helps dwarves." He persisted.

Honestly I was entirely convinced he was right. One of my first idea was to try and contact one of the people I had … hem … healed, and ask them to return the favour by giving me the information I wanted and needed. But there were several problems with this idea. First, it might take more time because it would first require me to try and locate one of those persons before contacting him or her. Then I would have to negotiate with said person before finally waiting for who knew how long to get what I wanted. And this would only work if the peasant I chose trusted me enough, which was already quite optimistic. Besides I had already traded my healing skills with them, technically they didn't owe me anything anymore. Well except the fact that they had broken the contract by attacking us…but I wasn't even sure it was the case; none of the town's folks had taken part in the fight.

I stifled an annoyed groan and repeated Kili's words in my head. 'No one helps dwarves.' Those were his exact words. 'No one helps dwarves.'

That was a risky thought but I had to voice it.

"Alright. But I'm not a dwarf…" A plan was forming in my mind already.

His eyed widened slightly and he looked frightened for a second. We remained silent for a moment, me thinking hard to try and develop the plan and him shaking his head and looking scared of me for a minute. I was already standing back up and he followed me, catching my wrist to force me to look at him.

"Nuh uh, no way I'm letting you go in that town alone." Kili had apparently caught on my trail of thoughts.

"Kili, it's actually perfect. I'd be able to get the information we need, I might even find out what actually happened there."

I won't lie, I was quite enthusiast about my little idea. I was happy to finally be able to concentrate on something. I wasn't really the kind of person to sit and watch. Not that I was prone to action either but still; being a surgeon, here a healer, meant having to act under pressure. It meant finding solution to life threatening problems. Somehow the situation we were in reminded me of that, except that instead of having to fight against time, viruses and medical complications, I would here have to fight against time and men.

I was already trying to map out in my mind how I could potentially infiltrate that town. Kili on the other hand was busy shaking his head wildly, obviously showing his discontent at my plan.

"They would kill me if I let that happen." Kili whined.

I didn't need him to be more specific, he obviously thought about the three brothers and probably Bofur and Fili as well as potentially every male dwarf of Thorin's Halls.

"Silly Kili, nobody would dare to kill you, besides they love you too much for that."

I grabbed my abandoned back pack and started to walk in the general direction whence we had come from, smiling softly at hearing Kili hiss.

"You're planning my death woman!" I turned to face him, fists on my hips.

"Look Kili, we have two options here. Either we do something or we ran back to Thorin's halls. You choose."

I knew that I was outwardly rather confident and calm. If I were honest though, I would recognize that I was probably as scared as Kili was right now. I knew this idea was dangerous. I wasn't stupid to think it wasn't. If we were to act on that plan, it would be a gamble. It was like playing poker; right now, we had no ace in hand and had to resort to bluff. The only thing that kept me together was the thought that we had no other choice and that wasting time might prove deadly for Bofur and Fili. Thankfully one of my few qualities was that I was able to think under pressure.

Kili was still thinking about it, I could almost see the wheels turning in his head. He took a moment, looking uncertain, before he frowned and answered.

"Alright, alright, we do something. But can we please at least think this through and bother make an actual sound plan. I know I'm supposed to be reckless, but there's a limit to everything…" He was pulling a face, obviously not convinced this was the best solution.

"Sure, now come on, let's go." I said, trying to sound confident. I heard him sigh loudly.

"Meli…"

"Yes?" I looked over my shoulder to see him point at our right.

"It's that way."

I blushed and it made him smirk. At least both of us were able to remain a bit positive even when facing some problems. That was a good thing, wasn't it? We started to walk but we hadn't been on the way for five minutes before Kili grabbed my wrist and forced me to stop.

"What is it now?" I whispered to him.

"Meli, how do you plan on going in this town unrecognized? The entire town's people know you already…"

"I wasn't. I thought…" And then I stopped.

Why hadn't I thought of that? If these people had hired mercenaries to attack us, why would any of them help me? The stakes just rose dramatically. The danger was more important than I had thought.

Damn…

* * *

**A/N: As always, I want to express my thanks to the reviewers/followers/favourites and readers in general :) The nice comments I receive are really amazing. Thank you to everyone for your interest in this story!**

**Mary :) Your review truly made me smile, I hope this chapter wasn't updated during one of your class ;) And I hope that you enjoyed this chapter too! Thanks again for your support!**

**Nameless Guest/ and all the other who wonders about that too: I probably won't do Nori's POV. I think it's nicer if you guys make up your mind as to what he's thinking. If I were to put it into words, it would probably change your vision of the story. But I might do Ori's or Dori's. Still, this probably won't happen until I've finished this story or am fairly advanced in the chapters.**

**A small note about the previous chapter (thanks to Clumsy0132 for reminding me) I wanted to ask: do you wish for me to put the translation of the few Khuzdul words used in the story / at the end in the A.N / not at all ? I posted on my profile the 2 websites I use for Khuzdul references. For those who wonders about the meaning of 'Mizimul' Nori will tell Amelia but later...real later... I'm not even sure when exactly as of yet. **

**About this chapter, well, first I hope you liked it. I know it's slightly shorter than the previous ones..but honestly I'm giving up trying to keep the length consistent. I can just promise it will never be under 6000 words. **

**The Ri brothers will return soon... don't worry :)**

**Thanks for reading! Thanks for your support!**

**Next update either Sunday or Monday :)**


	21. The Great Escape, Dwarf Edition

**Everything belongs to JRRTolkien**

**Warning: I put the warnings for the whole story on my profile, but just in case...violence ahead**

* * *

That night we camped in the woods, well we didn't really camp, we sat close together to keep warm because we didn't dare to light a fire. Thankfully we still had our warms coats, scarves and hoods. We had managed to find some bushes which grew around a tree trunk and had crawled under the bushes to find some hidden space between them and the actual trunk. There wasn't much room and we barely managed to both get in but we didn't care, at least if felt safe…or relatively so.

We had walked a large circle around town, staying deep under the forest cover at all times. Now we found ourselves at its south west, Kili had said before explaining to my confused mind that we had arrived from the north that morning and ran away towards the east after jumping out the window.

Even though I was upset and scared at the whole situation we were in, I managed to sleep a bit. Kili held me against his chest the whole night and I felt reassured by his presence. I was quite certain me being here was good for his morale too. It did bring to my mind another warm chest though, but there was no time to ponder on such thoughts.

We had spent the whole day arguing about the "Plan". I had been adamant, we needed to know what was happening in there and there was no way I'd spent two or three days running back to Thorin's Halls; in such a long period of time, those people could do anything to Bofur and Fili.

Kili had finally agreed but had let me known in no uncertain terms that he didn't like my idea, at all. Well, seeing as we had no other, we didn't have much choice but to try and hope that the villagers would feel that they owed me.

The morning came and we crawled out of our hiding place, both feeling tired and tensed.

We silently made our way to the town and stayed hidden near the forest's edge, observing the town from afar. After a few silent hours I had spent clutching at the beads in my braid though, my patience ran thin and I stood, removing slowly my coat, scarf, hood, gloves and mittens. Kili looked at me perplexed but took the items as I handed them to him each at a time.

I then grabbed a leather thread and used it to keep my hair in a low ponytail that dissimulated my braid. Once I was certain it was properly hidden, I took some mud, dirt and twigs and rubbed them on my skin and in my hair too. I rubbed some dirt on my clothes too. All this time Kili stared at me with a befuddled look.

"Alright, what are you doing? Have you lost your mind?" Kili asked perplexed.

"Nope." I answered. "But those people pitied me when I was fine and healthy, I'm just hoping that me looking tired, dirty and hurt would help them remember that."

I stood back up eyeing my clothes sceptically before nodding to myself. I was dirty enough and looked rather pathetic and helpless, which was what I'd aimed for. Then I bent to take the dagger that had been hidden in my boot this whole time.

I unsheathed it, startling Kili who had simply stared at me with wide eyes.

"Wow, what are you planning now?!" he grabbed my wrist, holding the dagger as far from me as possible.

"Kili…" I sighed. "If I'm hurt and helpless surely they're bound to underestimate me right?"

I eyed him before handing him the dagger.

"You better do it before I poke my eye out."

"What?! No! I didn't agree with this!" He almost shouted, barely resisting the urge to jump away from me.

It took some shushed arguing before Kili finally took the dagger and pulled on a face, muttering.

"I'm going to get skinned. Not killed, but skinned."

I rolled my eyes at his antics before slapping his shoulder.

"Come on, be quick." I muttered darkly.

I expected it to sting or hurt but as I closed my eyes and waited for the blade to sink in my skin, nothing happened. I opened one eye gingerly and saw Kili's stubborn and annoyed face.

"I really don't think it's necessary…" Kili persisted.

"I don't like it anymore than you do!" I hissed.

"Then really let's stop it here. I already feel terrible for agreeing with this plan."

We glared at each other. I didn't enjoy the fact that he was about to cut my face, but it just wouldn't do if I came in that town looking alright and perfectly fine. I was about to give him a piece of my mind when he said.

"I really think you look harmless, useless and helpless enough. You're a human but you're so small and without your warm coat and hood it's easy to see you're not muscled. I'm pretty sure that if you go in there they'd think nothing of it."

I glared slightly at him, I didn't particularly appreciate being considered so hopeless by my own friend, but he was unfortunately right. I looked at him and the dagger in his hand; maybe he was right. After all I really didn't relish being cut to pieces so I finally relented. Honestly it really wasn't that hard for him to convince me.

"Fine. We'll do it that way then."

He mechanically swiped the dagger's blade, showing his care for such details and gave it back to me, helping me make sure it was invisible under my boot and breeches. I had asked him whether he thought they would try and search me for weapons but he had shrugged helplessly. We had no idea as to how the people would react to my presence. If we were lucky, the simple fact that I was a woman would divert their suspicions but in all truth the peasants could be nice with me or just as well kill me.

I was ready to lie about how they had been right the last time and how I had no choice but to obey the mean dwarves…a stupid lie really, but that would play right into their beliefs and prejudices about dwarves and if it could save all our lives, I didn't mind having to act a bit.

Everything seemed ready for me to go and I stood motionless, facing Kili. There was a sudden pause, we both looked like we wanted to say something yet couldn't or didn't actually know what to say. I could easily see Kili's struggle about this risky plan and I was reminded once more of the dwarves' natural protectiveness. We didn't have much choice though; we needed to try and find our friends, and if possible free them too. Looking at each other I ended up forcing a reassuring smile on my face before clearing my throat.

"So…"

"So..."

"Well, I guess I should go then…"

I hadn't taken three steps that Kili was grabbing my arm, stopping me before engulfing me in a tight embrace. I encircled his waist with my arms and closed my eyes, taking a shaky breath. We stayed like this for a few minutes before I pulled back. Neither of us wanted to let go though, that much was clear.

"Please, be careful." He whispered, grimacing.

"I will."

"You remember the signs I taught you?"

I nodded before repeating each hand sign in front of him. That he had taken the liberty to teach me some Iglishmêk was a clear sign of what a dire situation we were stuck in. We had both agreed to deal with the consequences of me learning a few words later; surely, we had thought, my status of ward would make my pitiful knowledge bearable for the other dwarves. Still, I had agreed not to reveal anything before Kili did.

* * *

Ten minutes later I was staggering and limping toward the closest house. I did hope my acting skills would be enough for these men. Logically they should be as they had already worked once. Now if only they could be either friendly with me or stupid enough to believe some more lies. When I noticed that a few people nearby had spotted me, I tried my best to look exhausted, frightened, and helpless.

That wasn't too complicated all things considered…

When a child pointed his finger at me I braced myself and made it look like I had stumbled before I let myself fall in a heap on the muddy ground. I stayed there and closed my eyes when I heard rushed steps getting towards me.

A hand brushed my cut cheek and I blinked, fluttering my eyes open just slightly.

I didn't even try to speak as I looked at the woman whom I had met several times during my previous visit here.

"Oh, missy…" She whispered brokenly. "You shouldn't have come back."

Maybe it was the look in her eyes, maybe it was her voice, I wasn't too sure about what hinted it, but something in my gut told me that something was indeed very wrong in that town. I heard other voices and knew that people were coming our way. I had to try and talk to her right now, especially now that I had seen her reaction. She seemed genuinely afraid and concerned for me. She seemed broken. I had a split second to decide whether to trust my instinct or try to stick to the plan and tell her the lie about me escaping from the dwarves' evil clutches.

It was nothing but a bet. A risky, potentially deadly bet…and I decided to gamble.

"My friends…" I murmured hurriedly. "Are they alive?"

The woman barely had the time to whisper a 'yes' when I felt two hands fall heavily on my shoulders before I was yanked brutally to my feet. I didn't even try to stop a yelp to pass my lips. This man was a brute.

"Who are you?" He growled at me, turning me forcefully so we were face to face.

For a second I didn't know what to say. I felt fear grip at my heart, mixing with the short lived relief I had felt at hearing my friends were alive.

"I…er…" I stammered helplessly.

"She comes from a small settlement further away in the valley."

I had trouble hiding my surprise when I heard the woman, whose name I still didn't know I realized, trying to protect me.

The man who held me was tall and broad shouldered. His hair was cut very short and he had stubble on his cheeks, though it only gave him a dirty, disgusting appearance. His fingers dug painfully in my shoulders and I saw him eye the woman suspiciously.

"My…" I stuttered to bring his attention back on me. "My family was attacked. I ran away."

He narrowed his eyes at me and then barked at the woman to go back to her children, though he used the term whelps. What a charming personality this idiotic brute seemed to have.

He then violently pushed me towards the town's centre and only then did I realize that a second man had been there, though completely silent, all along. Each of them took me by one shoulder and forced me to follow them.

Thinking quickly I decided to take yet another bet. The men were not looking at me, mumbling between themselves about things I didn't care about, for nothing concerned me or my friends. Slowly I inched my right hand behind the man's back, hiding it from both their views.

Quickly I signed two of the several words Kili had taught me.

_Alright._

_Safe._

* * *

A few hours later I was sitting in the town's master house, looking straight into the creepy man's face, who still hadn't put two and two together and didn't recognize me. Yet I couldn't find it in myself to rejoice; this man scared me more than anyone else. His cold demeanour, his ugly face and his eyes that leered at me made my skin crawl.

Since my arrival I had been forced to face that awfully creepy man who had spent all the time asking me questions after questions. I couldn't understand what was happening. It felt as if he was the master here, not a simple mercenary hired by the town's folk.

Had Kili and I been mistaken? Was something else going on? And why had the woman been so scared? Why did she help me if these men had been hired? Was it due to her beliefs about dwarves enslaving people?

I was forced to focus back on the horrible man when he slammed his hand on the wooden table loudly.

"So, missy, where do you come from? What happened to you?" he repeated once more, narrowing his eyes at me and I had to force myself not to sigh.

How many times would he ask me the same questions? This man wasn't only creepy, he was stubborn and annoying to a point where dwarves appeared like little friendly angels.

"I lived with my family in a small settlement near the mountains. We didn't name it, it was so small, just a few families. And a week ago we were attacked. My family, they made me run and hide as soon as they saw the weird men coming. I'm alone now, all alone." As I spoke, I thought about all the terrible things that could happen or might already have happened. That did the trick and my voice broke as I lied.

I hid my faces behind my hands and held my breath as this man pondered once more on what I had said. I had been careful not to always repeat the exact same words, forcing myself to stammer, blabber and ramble. I had told this tale with small variations and hesitations numerous times already, trying not to sound as if I had rehearsed it, but he still didn't believe me.

Well I couldn't hold it against him; it wasn't exactly the truth, though it wasn't entirely lies either.

"I don't trust you."

Well, now was the right time to prove I could honestly deserve some acting reward.

I forced myself to look at him and let my lower lip tremble. I stared at him with the best puppy eyes I could make. I looked into his eyes and squeaked in a shaky voice.

"Please mister…I can work until my family comes back. They can't all have died. Can they?"

At this question I looked at the men around, trying to sound as much like a little lost girl as possible. A few of them shifted awkwardly on their feet, some looked at me with pity. But most of them stared at me blankly, clearly uncaring.

I lowered my head, looking around slightly from under my eyelashes. The room was small and crowded by these weird people. The little furniture there was, was made of wood and clearly not new. I was mostly surprised to see so much food displayed on the counters and table though. It hadn't looked like the first woman had anything in her cellar as she seemed painfully thin, yet here I could see apples, cheese, bread, meat even.

Then I saw in a corner a weird weapon that made me shiver. It looked lethal. Horrifyingly so. It was in my mind a very good example of medieval weaponry, what with all the metal that spiked the end of this weird looking metallic club. I shivered and forced my gaze away, I really didn't want to think about what that thing would do to me.

The creepy man, called Abbot I had found out, stood up and ordered for me to be put in one of the rooms upstairs.

I didn't try to resist, instead choosing to hide my face behind my hands and faking a dry sob.

The men harshly hosted me to my feet and guided me upstairs toward a door at the end of a dark corridor and pushed me brutally in a small, cold bedroom. I heard the door click shut behind me and their steps leading them away. I waited for a few minutes, still faking sobs in case they had good ears or someone was still behind the door.

I glanced around. There was just a small wooden bed that looked too old to hold my weight, a wooden table and a chair. That was it. On the bed there wasn't any pillow and just a yellowy sheet.

Then I went to the window and tried to find out whether Kili was around there somewhere. I couldn't see anything though, and I wondered what I had expected. Seeing that no men were in sight I stayed in front of the window and repeated few words in Iglishmêk.

_'Alright. Safe. Alright. Safe.'_

I could only hope that Kili, wherever he was right now, was able to see me. After awhile I stopped and looked sceptically at the window. Surely these men wouldn't be so dumb? But then, they still seemed to believe I was some sort of weak and helpless girl, which actually wasn't far from the truth, even though that Abbot clearly suspected me of one thing or another. Still I gingerly placed my hands on the windowsill and tried to slowly push, pull and basically tried any movement I could think of to open the window. Finally I managed to open it, but only enough for me to pass a hand under the glass, in the opening. The mechanism was rusted and I just wasn't strong enough to push it further upwards.

I sighed and turned away, listening for sounds around. I was about to go and try opening the door when I heard a low whoosh, followed by a dull thud.

I blinked and looked around. It took me awhile to find the dark arrow stuck in one of the bed-posts. I quickly grabbed it and smiled. This was one of Kili's arrows, I was certain of it. This dwarf truly was amazingly skilled. I went back to the window and showed the arrow. I couldn't see Kili, but we both knew the other was alright. Right now that was the only thing that mattered.

_'Wait. Look around. Alright.'_

I said in Iglishmêk and didn't wait for him to send an arrow, assuming he had seen me. I went toward the door and stuck my ear against it. No one seemed to be around. I glanced through the window, night was falling quickly, but I should probably wait for the wee hours of the morning to act.

* * *

I couldn't tell what time it was, but probably around midnight, when I decided trying to open the door. I was getting impatient and waiting suddenly seemed ridiculous. I had heard some noise awhile ago and since then it had been completely silent in the house. Either everyone was asleep or they were not used to make any noise.

I tried to turn the doorknob and was shocked when I realized it wasn't actually locked. It made me blink and wonder at these men's stupidity and sexism. They clearly didn't even think I'd try and leave my room or my acting skills were really good and I had really looked like a helpless and scared peasant girl. I wondered then whether they really were all stupid; Abbot had seemed so suspicious of me earlier, then again, it only took me a glance to realize that there was simply no locker at the door. Still I wouldn't complain, I didn't know how to pick a lock and it would have been rather stupid to end up being held prisoner here. I slowly opened the wooden door.

Craning my head in the small opening, I took a glimpse around.

The corridor was dark and absolutely bare of any kind of decoration. There were five doors in total, including the one I was in. A small window at the end of it allowed some moonlight to filter in.

I inhaled slowly before stepping in the corridor. I could feel Nori's blade still hidden in my boot and that calmed me down, but I took Kili's arrow with me, though I had no idea what I could use it for. Maybe open a door? Stab someone in the eye with it? Yep, that should work perfectly.

Now, I knew Bofur and Fili had probably been put in the cellar, but should I not look around in case they were detained in another room? I hesitated for all but a minute, deciding it wouldn't cost me to have a quick look around. Well, as quickly as I could.

My heart was beating loudly against my ribcage and I was concentrating on my breathing, keeping it controlled and noiseless. Images of horror movies flashed through my mind and I had to shake my head, chastising myself mentally for being so silly. Now wasn't the time to panic or anything. Unexpectedly it did feel slightly thrilling to sneak around at night. But I couldn't find any enjoyment in it; I could only be grateful for the adrenaline that rushed in my veins, keeping me focused and prudent.

It felt like I had been walking in the darkness for ages before I finally stopped, facing the door next to mine in the corridor. I swallowed and gently turned the knob, hoping it wouldn't creak, and then pushed softly. The door opened soundlessly to a small dark room. Thankfully though, a tiny window let starlight leak inside, providing me with at least a little helpful light. Apparently none of the windows around had shutters, well I wouldn't complain about what little help I could find.

I peered around but couldn't see anything particular. This looked like a study of some sort and there were absolutely no dwarves in sight, just stored trunks that I had no time to open. I shut the door back close and quickly went to the third, only to be disappointed once more; this time it was a bathroom.

My heart almost stopped after I opened the fourth a little bit carelessly; after two useless rooms, I had let myself become less attentive and cautious. I opened the door quickly, thinking there wouldn't be anything inside, only to have my eyes widened in shock. Fear coursed through me and I held my breath. There wasn't anything in this room except for three beds currently occupied by snoring men. It took me several seconds to calm my nerves enough to close the door noiselessly and I had to wait for a few minutes to let my heart rate lower slightly.

I was obviously extremely prudent when I opened the last room which was once more occupied by sleeping men, two of them. I swallowed and quickly left that side of the corridor, silently going back to the top of the stairs.

I inhaled and tried to gather my courage before deciding whether I should risk going down and come face to face with one of the other men or not. Well, I hadn't really come here to spend my time waiting for something to happen. I had to try my best and find my friends and I couldn't think of another place where they'd be held prisoners other than in this house. They had to be in the cellar, there was no other place…

I thought back about the woman's words. She had said they were alive, but I wondered whether I really should trust her or not. As doubt menaced to weaken my hopes, I shook my head. I had to simply be logical about it all; I hadn't seen any corpse, surely that was a good sign, and now that I thought about it, there hadn't been pools of blood on the stairs outside the house. Considering this era's weapons, had they been killed during the fight, then they should have bled profusely. No pool of blood meant they were alive.

Yes, my friends were alive. There was no questioning it.

Bracing myself and clearly heartened by my deductions, I walked slowly downstairs, cringing each time a step would make the slightest noise. I felt I could breathe better when I finally put my feet on the stone floor. Now, where to go? Should I go directly to the cellar? Should I look around?

I knew the kitchen, where the interrogation had taken place, was on my right and the living room was behind me at the end of the corridor. I was facing the entrance door and the corridor I had followed the previous day with Kili was longing the stairs, going to the living room where the sick people had been put when I had healed them. The door to the cellar was the one just next to the living room.

I looked at my left to see that said corridor was leading to just one other door only.

Walking to this other door, I turned the knob and pushed slightly enough to peek inside. This was yet another bedroom, but it looked unoccupied. I was about to open the door completely and enter when a soft snore made me freeze. Looking in the direction of the bed I could barely distinguish a form under the mountain of covers and furs.

It was too big to be a dwarf and my best guess was that it was the creepy man. Next to the bed, shining slightly in the moonlight that leaked from the window was the spiked weapon.

I gulped and took a minute to find the courage to actually move.

In the end it took me several minutes to close the door for I was panicking at the idea of waking that man in particular. He really scared me more than all the others put together. Once the door was shut I took a few steps away from it and placed one hand on my chest, above my heart. It was thumping hard and I suddenly wondered whether the noise of its beat could be heard. It certainly sounded loud enough in my ears.

After a short while I braced myself and walked to the cellar door, paying extra attention to the noise now that I knew for certain someone was sleeping down here.

The door opened on the dark stone steps going down, leading to the cellar and occasional cell of this house. I hesitated slightly. I didn't really feel like going downstairs without a light, knowing my luck, I'd only be able to fall and break a leg or worse, my neck. I cursed my inability to light a candle and bit my lip.

My rational brain whispered that there would be no use in going there without a light or anything even though my conscious told me my two friends could very well be down there. It was the only room left and Fili and Bofur just had to be there. I tried to concentrate and listened intently for any noise the two dwarves were likely to make. I didn't dare whisper though for fear to wake the men, or worse, someone else from their group, who could be down those stairs.

I finally decided against doing anything without a light and was slowly going back, trying to go to the kitchen to see if there were embers in the oven there, when I heard a soft thud coming from the living room. My blood seemed to freeze in my veins and I didn't know what I should do. I was in the middle of the corridor. There was nowhere to hide, unless I tried and went down the dark stairs and I couldn't run towards it, for it'd make too much noise.

I was holding my breath, stuck on the spot, observing with terrified eyes as the door of the living room slowly opened. From the soft moon light that leaked into the corridor, I saw a short shape slowly make its way in the corridor.

He wouldn't have dared?!

I cursed the stupid dwarf that had absolutely no patience and sighed. I must have been loud enough for him to hear me because I saw him startle and unsheathe his sword.

"Oh stop that." I hissed in as low a whisper as I could.

I knew dwarves' ears were good but I was still surprised to see him instantly relax. He beckoned me to show him the way to the room upstairs and I glared at him. I had no way to let him know there were people around unless I talked, and I didn't dare do so in the empty corridors. I put a finger on my lips, hoping he'd understand the gesture and slowly made my way towards him. When I was close enough I saw he was frowning, gesturing for me to go upstairs while I shook my head. There were just too many men sleeping up there.

Besides, with Kili here, we could light a candle and go in the cellar. There was no point in going back to the small room and then down once more. The young dwarf relented and followed me, closing silently the door. We both walked to the furthest wall and crouched in the shadows.

I didn't give him time to say anything as I hissed, still keeping my voice down.

"Are you crazy? If they find you here can you imagine what they'd do? There're six of them in this house, five upstairs, one downstairs. I don't know where the others are."

"There are three of them in the streets, one at the entrance door of this house. They're guarding the place." He said but he didn't have the time to continue as I interrupted him.

"I just have to check the cellar; it's the last room I can think of." I felt nervous about it all, what if they weren't there?

"I think I know where they keep them. It's not in here. I needed to come and tell you." He whispered back, unperturbed by my rant.

"What? Really? Where?" At that news, I simply forgot completely about the risk Kili had taken.

"I saw some men going into a small shed in the north-west part of the woods." He breathed out, stepping closer to me so that we could keep our voices as low as possible.

"What? When?"

"After you got here; I saw you talk with that woman first, then be taken here. I couldn't see the house properly from where I was so I had to skirt around once more. Later, just after you told me you were alright, five of them went into the woods and I found it weird they'd go at that time when night was close to fall." He explained. "I followed them from afar for maybe one and a half mile, no more than two, to a shed. Probably used by hunters, anyway there's no window in it so I don't know what's inside."

"Well, that'd be too easy otherwise, wouldn't it?" I muttered really annoyed by our lack of luck.

"The men went inside and stayed for some time, maybe one hour. Then five of them went back to town but, three of the five were different men than before."

"They're guarding them." I breathed out as I suddenly felt rather depressed and Kili nodded.

"That's what I thought. What do you think we should do? Maybe with a good diversion we could outdo them?" He started to plan.

"Well, you think we could do it tonight?" I was anxious to find our friends.

"Maybe…we could wait for the late hours, when dawn isn't here yet and the night is at its darkest. That's usually when people on watch are the most tired."

"If you say so…"

I really didn't feel like it was such a good plan. It wasn't even a plan per se and sounded more like "let's go in and kick some ass". Not much strategically speaking. But well, the one we had so far wasn't much better anyway. Still, the fact we couldn't see what was happening inside bothered me. We couldn't be certain of anything. For all we knew there were ten of them inside that shed playing cards all night long and drinking while our friends where just down here in the cellar.

Then on the other hand if there was even the remote chance we'd prevail in this fight, then maybe we should do it. My gaze fell on Kili's arrow that I was still clutching tightly in my left hand as if it helped me. I grimaced turning it between my fingers while trying to find another option.

"If there's some light, you think you could kill, or at least incapacitate them with your bow?" I asked Kili with a frown.

For all I knew he had never killed anyone and might only have shot at rabbits.

"What are you thinking of exactly?"

I explained him the idea I had and after a few changes we agreed on giving it a try. We only had one shot though so we better be lucky this time. I really hoped they weren't guarding some useless things in that shed, otherwise we'll be in trouble and they might actually kill Fili and Bofur for revenge, especially if we killed their people for seemingly nothing.

We went back toward the broken window and I was about to jump outside when Kili stopped me and quickly went out of the room, in the corridor. I followed him to the door, bewildered and saw him enter the kitchen. He came back minutes later and opened his bag to let me see a loaf of bread, cheeses and apples that he had put hurriedly in it. He was about to go to the window when I stopped him with a hand on his shoulder. I leant toward him and whispered close to his ear.

"Shouldn't we at least check the cellar here? That's where the others had been imprisoned."

I saw him hesitate for a minute. He was apparently sure the men wouldn't go so far in the woods if it wasn't to guard prisoners and honestly, I agreed with him. But I just couldn't walk away of this house knowing there might be a chance, however slight, that our friends were down there in this blasted cellar.

I saw Kili give me a sharp nod and I pointed at candles on a table nearby the hearth. Kili made quick work of lighting one and gestured for me to stay in the living room. I saw him once more disappear in the corridor but this time, the light of the candle seemed like a dangerous beacon to me. My heart was pounding louder than ever as I waited for him to come back.

I prayed for our friends to be down there so that we could just run away without having to plan and fight.

But when Kili reappeared his face was grim, obviously he too had hoped Fili and Bofur would be down the dark stairs. Forlornly we both retraced our footsteps of the day before to the window and Kili gestured for me to jump first.

Once outside I shivered from the cold but running to the forest warmed me up. Once we were under the cover of the trees' shadows, I took back my clothes and backpack Kili had hid under a bush. We both remained silent and Kili waited patiently for me to be ready before leading me in that shed's direction.

* * *

One hour later we were observing the little shed from afar. It was made of wood and looked like it was about to fall to the floor. As Kili had said, there wasn't any window but light was seeping through a small space between the floor and the bottom of the door. At least we were certain that some people were inside and were likely awake.

"Well, I guess we won't need the torch." I whispered.

"Unless they blow the lights out when you arrive." Kili frowned.

"Surely if we surprise them, they wouldn't have the time to react that way." I groaned, though he was right.

And because we couldn't guess how they would react, I started preparing a torch with dry branches I found close by for we had nothing better to use. Kili would light it at the last moment for me.

"So, you say there're three of them inside?" I asked for the umpteenth times.

"Well, there might be more." He repeated once more and it still didn't please me to hear it.

"Great. Something worries me though." He cocked an eyebrow at me, as if saying 'only one thing?' but I ignored him and continued. "Let's say one of them opens the door and you manage to shoot him." He nodded at that. "How can we be sure the other two's reaction won't be to immediately kill Fili and Bofur?"

His face fell at that. We really hadn't thought this through and I didn't trust my lucky star. Not tonight. Not after the events of the previous day. The both of us stared at each other and I felt as if we'd end up hugging soon. It was clear we had no idea of what we were doing; we were just improvising and had no valuable information. We were basically gambling and we knew it, the worst part of it all being that this time, the reward wouldn't be silver or money, but the lives of our friends, of Kili's brother.

Suddenly the life or death situation seemed much more real than it had been that morning when I had entered the town. Back then I had thought that in the worst case scenario I would be able to lie convincingly enough to find my way out of a bad situation and Kili was still free in any case. Now though…there was no safety net, no plan B. We would simply try and enter that shed, hoping that only three of them would be in and that they would all die quickly and quietly. There was no certainty.

"They might be mercenaries, but they're no real warriors." He tried to convince himself and we both knew it. "Besides they're not expecting us, they wouldn't have prepared any plan."

Neither of us could ignore it; we were trying to reassure ourselves more than anything else. Still, Kili made sense, and there was no point in dwelling on what could or couldn't happen. We needed to act, not worry ourselves over unknown facts.

"You might have to use your dagger though." Kili said while visibly wincing.

I gulped at that and gingerly took the blade, holding it in my right hand. I really didn't think I'd ever be able to use it in such a way. I thought about Fili and Bofur, imagined what those men might have done to them, might do to them if we were to fail in our rescue attempt.

My grasp tightened around the hilt without me realizing it. I looked back at Kili and nodded, though I perfectly knew I might at best distract the men in there with the blade, nothing more. I purposely occulted thoughts of what would happen if I found myself facing one of these men's swords. I had no illusions, with or without Nori's dagger I wouldn't survive a confrontation with one of these mercenaries, unless he only wanted to capture me, which wasn't exactly a better solution as far as I was concerned.

"Maybe you should come closer too, if you're ready to fire anyway, they won't have time to see you and then you'll be here quickly enough to help me. I'll be able to play for time but not much else I'm afraid."

We looked at each other and I stood up, clearly uncertain and worried. For a short moment I struggled to stop the trembling in my knees. I tried to square my shoulders and attempted to give myself a mental pep talk but to be honest, I wasn't very good at it.

We both walked in the direction of the shed's door, Kili had an arrow already notched and was ready to draw his bow in case one of them went out unexpectedly. When we were around ten meters away from the door we stopped and Kili bent down, eyeing the door suspiciously before letting his bow and arrow on the ground.

He made quick work of lighting the torch and gave it to me.

"Remember to stay on the side so that I can have proper shots."

I nodded and gulped. My palms were sweaty and my heart pounded in my chest. I braced myself and briskly walked to the door. My left hand was holding the torch and the dagger was in my right one. At that moment, I realized I was actually planning the death of people I knew nothing about. Wasn't that worse than anything else I might have done before? Wasn't it far worse than poisoning the villagers? What was I doing? I shook my head, wishing those ideas away from my mind. They were mercenaries; they had attacked us first and had abducted my friends. What we were planning was legitimate, defensive action. They were not innocent. They were criminals. We had no other choices.

I had to concentrate on my task, not its consequences. Not now.

Now I needed to focus.

I took a deep breath and decided now was as good a time as it will ever be to start our rescue operation. I knocked loudly at the door with my right hand, hitting the hilt of the dagger against the wooden surface and started to shout.

"Help, please. Please, open the door."

I heard shuffling and curses inside before heavy steps came in my direction. I took a few steps back, standing slightly to the side of the door.

"Please, is there anyone here? Please open the door!"

I never would have thought my voice could become so … girly. I sounded like a stupid victim in any crappy scary movie. I quickly pushed away thoughts of blood baths and psychopaths who were living in forest sheds. I really didn't need to scare myself more than I already was.

The door opened on a tall, lanky man and I quickly hid the dagger I held by turning slightly so that he wouldn't see my hand as it lay on my side.

"Who are you?" The man narrowed his eyes at me.

He was rather tall and large. He towered over me in an oppressive way. A terrifying image of him killing me rather gruesomely crossed my mind and I shivered.

"I was in the house when strange looking men came in. I escaped but they're everywhere in town. I ran here and saw this house from afar. Please you have to come and help." I squeaked in a small voice.

"What? What did they look like?" A second man came behind the first.

This one was leaner and taller than the first. His long hair didn't dissimulate an ugly scar on the side of his face and I gulped when I realized he had no more right ear. These men were accustomed to violence, that much was clear.

"Well, they were rather gruff looking and short…"

I took a step back, trying to tempt the men to step out of the shed. Kili could shot them I was sure, but right now the third still hadn't made any appearance and it worried me. Apparently Kili was thinking along the same line.

"It could be the…" started the second one, finally stepping out, slightly forcing his friend to do so too.

"Hey, who's this?" The first one interrupted him and stepping further out of the way.

The first man's hand went to his side, probably to grab the sword hanging there, looking in Kili's direction. Then everything went very fast.

Before he could even touch the hilt of his sword I heard one whooshing sound, quickly followed by a second one and then screams echoed in the night. But I didn't wait to look at the body falling on the floor. Letting the torch fall in the grass I sprinted inside the house, jumping above the large man already lying there and shouldering the second leaner one as he staggered to the floor, an arrow protruding from his chest. I felt a hand trying to grab my ankle but a swift backward kick, which was then followed by a grunt, allowed me to enter freely.

With a quick glance around I analyzed the situation surprisingly quickly.

Adrenaline rushed in my veins, allowing me to be astonishingly quick and reactive. As soon as I entered the shed, I saw the third man and jumped in his direction without missing a beat. He was already running toward a door at the back, his sword in his hand.

I ran behind him.

He pushed the door violently open and ran quickly to the back of the room. I was already close behind him when I saw him raise his sword above his head. I stared at this man's back.

I could make out two forms lying on the floor in front of him but my eyes were glued to the mercenary.

I knew what he was about to do and I saw red. A rage I had never felt before overpowered me.

Blood rushed in my ears.

I didn't analyze the situation. I had no time. I didn't hear Kili's shout from behind me. I didn't see Fili's wide eyes. I didn't see Bofur trying to move in front of the blond dwarf.

My mind went blank.

Just blank.

And then instinct took complete control over my body.

In a split second I was raising my hand far above my head, still running toward the man, not even realizing I was screaming hatefully. The seconds were ticking painstakingly slowly, but I was still running out of time.

As the man's sword was starting its deadly course towards the bodies on the ground I jumped, knocking and destabilizing him, while I brought my hand down quickly and with all the strength I could gather, using the momentum of our fall to my advantage.

I felt the short resistance as the blade pierced leather and clothes, skin and bones.

It didn't deter me at the time. I was completely lost in an entirely new feeling of blood rage. I raised my hand once more, yanking the blade free with a disgusting noise I didn't hear and then I brought it down again.

And again. And again. And again…

I felt a warm liquid splatter on me but I didn't care. I wasn't conscious of the fact that I was straddling the man's back, hitting him repeatedly as he lay motionless on the floor. Hate and rage were the only things I felt.

Only one thought swirled in my clouded mind. Protect Fili and Bofur at all costs.

It was Kili's hands on my forearms that finally brought me out of my trance and he forced me to stand and step back, pushing me to the opposite wall and forcing me to sit down.

He took the dagger, struggling against my strong grip before letting the blade clatter on the wooden floor.

My mind was completely clouded and I looked at the events happening around me without really registering anything.

Kili went to the two forms still lying on the floor and quickly freed them. Then I saw Fili and Kili leave this room to do who knows what in the other part of the shed while Bofur came to my side but my brain truly couldn't register anything at the moment. I saw the dead man, I heard the blood still rushing in my ears and my heart beating at an incredible pace.

I smelt the coppery smell of blood. I could even taste it.

My eyes widened as I drew in a quick breath.

What?

What had I...?

"Amelia. Amelia, look at me. Look at me lass." Bofur repeated until his voice finally broke into my torpor.

I struggled to focus on him and his words. His hands were rubbing my arms forcing some warmth in them and making me realize how bloody cold I suddenly felt. My gaze was glued to the form that lay still a few meters away, a pool of red blood already expending around it. There was blood on the wall. My eyes widened and I tried to look anywhere but in front of me. As I looked up I saw the trails of blood drops on the ceiling too.

A dry sob escaped my mouth and I started to shake violently.

Bofur quickly brought his arms around me and held me against his chest while I broke into heavy sobs. I didn't hear Kili and Fili come back but I knew they were around. I could hear their shushed whispers.

"Lass, I know it's hard but we need you to brace yourself for now." Bofur voice softly whispered in my ear and somehow, I heard him clearly.

"I…I…I'm sorry…" I stammered.

"It's fine, it's perfectly normal. But you can't think about that right now, we have to run away quickly. Can you stand?"

I nodded and Bofur helped me up. As soon as I was on my two feet I was engulfed in a tight hug. Blinking into the blond hair I hugged Fili's back, before he released his grip on me and Kili took me in his arms too.

It took several more minutes for my brain to start to work again, and in order to do so I had to force myself to push aside any thoughts other than those of my friends and running away. Denial truly was an impressive thing...I needed to focus now and I'll let myself crumble later, preferably somewhere where we didn't risk being killed on the spot if we were seen.

"We need to leave now. They will chase us as soon as they find out about our escape." Bofur said.

"If we're lucky, they won't find out before morning. We're too far from town for them to have heard any noise." Kili said.

"It will give us some time to put as much distance between us and them then." Fili muttered.

"Mine and Meli's bags are not far from here. Did they bring yours in this shed?"

"No. They took our weapons too." Fili angrily grunted.

"We can't retrieve them right now. Better run away and come back another time." Bofur seemed as angry and upset as Fili about it. "We should not waste anymore time. Let's go."

"Wait." Fili said stopping Bofur. "Why don't we take their weapons? It's better than nothing."

Bofur nodded and did whatever they needed to do while I went outside, purposely avoided to look at two large dark pools next to the door and the two dead bodies that had been dragged inside. I went to retrieve my bag and Kili's. My whole body seemed to be on autopilot, my brain was completely disconnected from reality and I was thankful for this small reprieve. When I came back with the bags, the three of them were waiting for me.

As soon as Kili took his backpack we started to walk toward the forest and suddenly an idea occurred to me.

"You said that they'll try to chase us, right?" At their nods I asked. "In what directions are we going right now?"

"North, towards the mountains."

Fili answered with a shrug as if it were the obvious choice; the problem was…it was the obvious choice.

"It's too predictable. They'll go looking for us in that direction. They won't even try to track us. They'll just run in the direction of the mountain, of our home. We have to go somewhere else."

They clearly seemed to ponder on this and Bofur finally nodded, agreeing with me it would be less risky for us to make a detour. After all there were only four of us and I really didn't count if we had to fight. Besides both Bofur and Fili were forced to use others weapons and I could feel they didn't like it one bit.

After some hushed discussion we, or rather they, decided to go westward, toward the south's edge of the mountains.

We walked all night long and didn't stop until the sun was high in the sky. By the time we found a place remote enough for us to hide I was exhausted. My feet hurt, my back hurt, but I was entirely too tired to complain. And too scared too. I kept looking behind my shoulder, expecting hordes of men to fall on us.

As Bofur said we should take a short break, I let myself fall on the nearest small boulder and closed my eyes for a moment. I opened them when Kili took out of his bag four of the apples he had stolen. After he distributed them, we ate in silence.

I focused all my thoughts on eating the juicy fruit, knowing it wasn't still the time for me to think about that night's events. Swallowing seemed like a feat at the moment and I coughed as an apple piece got stuck in my throat. I avoided looking at the three dwarves. I could feel them observing me, obviously waiting for the moment I'll break down.

Well, they could wait because I was rather set on keeping myself together until I was in some place safe. Preferably a place where I knew I'd find three pairs of arms ready to embrace me and hold me together. Tears burnt my eyes but I somehow managed to swallow them back.

My thoughts then shifted to Dori, Nori and Ori and how I wished they were here. Then I tried to imagine what they would say when they would find out what happened and I almost winced. It wouldn't be pretty… I took a long shaky breath and swallowed back tears once again. After having closed my eyes for a second I opened them to have a look at my three, unnaturally silent companions.

As I had thought, they had been observing me but they avoided my gaze, uneasy, when I looked back at them. I frowned at realizing that Fili had a dark mark on his left cheekbone. I stared at it intensely and I didn't pay attention to the worried glances the three dwarves exchanged as I was so focused on Fili.

Finally my brain had something to concentrate on. I stood up, frowning and went straight toward the blond dwarf, stopping just a step away and he looked at me, clearly puzzled by my actions.

"Strip"

Alright, I might have been a tad too straightforward and I definitely should have been a bit more precise about my intentions. I could only say that my mind was having trouble functioning normally at the moment.

Fili's face turned bright red and I heard something metallic clank against the rocks behind me.

"What?" Fili squeaked in a strangled voice.

"I need to examine you. Somehow I don't think this bruise is the only one you received, now obey your healer and strip."

I could see him breathe more easily and, had the situation been different, I might have snorted. Bofur apparently had no qualms in doing so and I told him without looking back at him.

"Laugh all you want, you're next."

From the strangled sound I heard I gathered he hadn't expected it. Kili's chuckle brought a small smirk to my lips. It felt both great and odd to smirk in such a moment. I didn't ponder on that feeling though, Fili was finally standing up.

I hissed when he finally relented and removed his light coat, tunic and shirt. His chest was black and blue. Anger and hate were the predominant feelings in my chest, forcing my heart to beat wildly.

I swore.

Those bastards had apparently thought it funny to beat the two dwarves. I knew even before seeing it that Bofur would be in a similar state. Fili had a few bruised and cracked ribs as well as a long cut on his arm, just below his right shoulder. I cursed myself for not seeing it before. Seriously how difficult could it be to spot a cut and dried blood on a coat? Well apparently it was too difficult for my clouded brain. I cursed myself; a healer should be able to keep his mind clear all the time. I felt like I had failed my friends.

I rummaged through my backpack, glad I had taken upon myself to bring an improvised first-aid kit, and took out several small jars and vials, as well as a few bandages. This time I had taken more things with me than I had for my first trip to Gorm. As I took some bandages out I looked at Fili. He was about to protest but the glare I sent his way placated him and he quickly shut his mouth.

"I'm the healer here, so sit down and stop acting all tough."

I cleaned his wound first, blood had dried and clotted on it and once I removed it, I put some ointment to prevent infection and quickly put a clean bandage around it. I took some time to rub another ointment on his chest. Fili was beetroot red and Kili was mocking him, though I didn't pay attention to it.

"Oy, brother, you alright there? Enjoying yourself much?" Kili guffawed.

"Why? You jealous? I can help you sport a few bruises if you are…" Fili snapped back, though there wasn't any anger in his tone, merely embarrassment.

I told him not to do too much effort for awhile and try to get some rest as soon as we'll be in a safe place. He nodded and while he put back his clothes, I turned toward Bofur. The older dwarf was already removing his own garments and I spotted his grimace when he raised his arms. I quickly stepped in to help him and didn't even need to examine him to guess he likely suffered from at least one cracked rib.

Now that I was paying attention to it, I could see his breath was slightly shallow and he was clearly in pain. I ordered Kili to put some water to boil, which only helped us realize we hadn't much left and we'd soon need to find a clear stream. This mission really couldn't get any worse at this point. Still, the lack of water didn't worry us, we'll soon be high enough in the mountains to be able to gather what clean snow we could find and melt it.

Bofur's chest and back were worse than Fili's if that was even possible, and he had three cracked ribs and so many bruises that I didn't even bother to count them. A nasty gash on his shoulder had stopped to bleed already but I removed all the dried blood and cleaned it properly before tending to it. My anger towards these men grew tenfold. I knew dwarves were strong and resilient. There was no doubt in my mind that it must have taken quite some strength and some furious energy to break their bones. My eyes turned cold and steely when Bofur put his hand on my shoulder, slightly patting it.

"T'is alright lass. Just a few bruises. Nothing I've never already have."

"It's not alright." I snapped. "They had no right to do that to you. Don't you think I know how much effort was required to inflict those bruises?"

"Ow, they had to put some efforts alright. But we gave as much as we received…and some of them were not looking that well. It was a nice little battle..." He started but I interrupted him.

"Bofur, don't patronize me and don't think I'm stupid. Those aren't battle inflicted injuries." I bristled at his blatant lies and he had the decency to look sheepish.

"You shouldn't worry about us lass. We're strong." He gently said, still smiling softly.

"I'm a healer! And your friend! Of course I worry for you!" I had trouble to speak past the lump in my throat.

"And you're a good healer and a great friend." Fili intervened with a soft tone. "I'm already feeling better."

I huffed, annoyed at their attitude towards me. They chose not to insist, probably understanding that it wasn't such an abnormal thing that I'd feel bad at seeing them like this. Looking at their wounds had even put a damper on Kili's mood.

No one made anymore comments when I cursed the men after seeing that Bofur sported some cuts on his forearms and knuckles too.

It hadn't come to my mind that they might let me groan and curse, complaining about dwarves and their silly pride, simply to let me concentrate on something else than our escape. I was apparently transparent for them and I didn't realize it. Still, if I had I would have thanked them, thanks to their attitudes my mind was as far as it was possible from the man I had killed.

Later that evening, we finally arrived in the higher parts of the mountains and decided to camp near a small stream that ran between two rocks before disappearing quickly back into the mountain side. There was barely an inch of snow on the ground, but it was enough to be horribly uncomfortable. The night was short and we had to keep watches.

All in all I barely got any sleep.

We were freezing. The men had stolen Bofur's and Fili's warm fur coats, leaving them only with their thin leather coats that really weren't adapted to the weather or the snow in the mountains. We huddled close together, trying to keep each other warm and using my and Kili's coats as blankets of sorts. Right now, there was no thought about what was proper and what was not; in such a situation, even Dori probably wouldn't have commented on the fact that I basically slept on Kili. No, propriety was far from our minds. We were more bothered that we couldn't even light a fire to warm ourselves; if we did we would take the risk of being spotted.

Bofur had explained, and it was simple logic really, that even the smallest fire on the mountain side at night would be a beacon for miles and miles around. During the day, at least, we could manage to light a smokeless fire which wouldn't pinpoint our position to our enemies. At night though, we didn't want to try our luck.

We woke up early the following morning, eating some bread and cheese but rationing ourselves for we didn't have much food and didn't really had the time to hunt.

We walked all day long, stopping only once for a short break.

It took us three more days of intense walking to find back the mountain path that would lead us straight to Thorin's Halls. I was past exhausted. The only good news was that until then we hadn't seen any sign of the men. I was relieved too because Bofur's and Fili's wounds were healing nicely.

In the afternoon during the third day, I felt a huge weight lift from my shoulder when I recognized the blue stone, marked with a dwarfish rune, which signalled the path to the Halls wasn't too far ahead of us. We'll just need to turn around a large rock and then take the left path at the fork and in about a day, maybe even earlier if we chose not to stop that night, we'll be in front of the massive doors.

We would soon be home and I'd be able to cry on Dori's, Nori's and Ori's shoulders.

I shook my head. Now wasn't yet the time to think about that. I bottled up my raging and conflicting feelings and walked with renewed energy when some noise drifted to us with the wind.

I looked at my three companions who had stopped, frozen in their spots. I silently sent them questioning glances. They didn't say a word but quickly grabbed my arms and I let them guide me toward the nearest boulder. I quickly understood they meant to hide from something. It was completely meaningless, I thought, the snow would give away our hiding spot. Still, we hid behind the large rock and Bofur whispered in my ear.

"Armed men are coming this way."

"You think they got ahead of us?" I whispered back.

"Possible."

"The snow…" I tried but stopped when Bofur nodded gravely.

Obviously they knew we were surely going to be discovered.

I gulped and closed my eyes.

I had just started to think we'll be safely home in a short time and now those hopes had been rudely crushed. Instinctively my hand found my braid and I pressed one of the beads tightly between my fingers, hoping to find some strength to face what was coming. This braid had become my lucky charm.

My three companions and I were utterly silent.

We waited, anxious to find out who would soon be coming from the path.

* * *

**A/N: Thanks to all the readers! And a huge thanks to the reviewers/followers/ favourites. The support is welcomed :)**

**Thank you Mary for reviewing so often!**

**I'm sorry I'll keep it short ...it's 2AM here and I'm falling asleep on the keyboard...Still I promised a chapter and here it is :) and a huge one too! (Hope you enjoyed it Mary!^^)**

**I hope you liked this chapter. As you see, I'm rather cruel with Amee...Yep, her first kill ever isn't a goblin but a man. I hope I wasn't too graphic. **

**For the Khuzdul, I put the website i use on my profile and I'll put the translation there too...So if some of you don't want to know and want to wait for Nori to say it, they can.(i'll add the translation tomorrow)**

**Next update in 2 or 3 days (Wednesday or Thursday...)**

**Thanks again everyone for the support!**


	22. Home at last

**Everything belongs to JRR Tolkien.**

**Warning: Violence (no more than the previous chapter though)**

* * *

I was completely crushed between Bofur and Fili, while Kili was readying himself to fire an arrow towards the people coming. My three friends were looking positively deadly. We heard the rushed footsteps coming closer to us to the point where they walked on the other side of the boulder we were using to hide. I held my breath, waiting for the shout that was sure to come when they would see the steps in the snow.

I could already envision the battle to come. This time I was certain there wouldn't be any prisoner taken, or if there was, I wasn't sure they would be in good health. My mind brought forth an image of the spiked club I had seen in the house and I felt myself start to tremble. Letting go of the bead I held until then, I pressed both my hands on my thighs, clenching my fists tightly.

Bofur placed a hand on my right one, squeezing it in what I guessed was supposed to be a reassuring way, forcing me to calm a bit. His other hand was holding the hilt of a man's sword tightly. Bofur usually fought with a hammer, I wasn't too sure how that differed from fighting with a sword, but I was pretty certain it didn't bode well for the fight to come.

I bit my lip as I felt Fili pressed a little more against me. Glancing at him I saw him force a small smile on his lips. He too was trying to reassure me though I knew perfectly well that he wouldn't be as efficient with the long sword he held now as he was with his two usual blades.

My heart threatened to stop when we heard the steps stop on the other side of the boulder.

Kili notched an arrow silently, frowning deeply and gravely.

Bofur let go of my hand to grab the hilt of the sword he held, his usual smile completely forgotten.

Fili readied himself to jump and fight, his face only reflecting determination.

Once more, I grabbed the blue bead of my braid and pressed it tightly between my fingers. I had forgotten how to breathe, and was silently praying to whatever lucky star was supposed to take care of me. Now was a good time to become useful.

I intently listened and felt tears burn behind my eyes when I heard grumbling voices and metal clanking not too far from us. At the same time as my three companions, I glanced towards the rather large group of people standing on the road, slightly further away from us.

They were short. Short and heavily armed. Short, heavily armed and hairy.

Dear lord, they were dwarves!

The relief I felt almost made me cry on the spot and I had difficulties swallowing the tears back. I could stop the surprised gasp that escaped my mouth though but I didn't see if it had made any of the dwarves react because I closed my eyes for a moment.

After several frozen seconds spent in silent shock and relief, we jumped from behind the boulder, shouting at them. When they turned to face us, weapons ready to be used, I could see they were dwarves looking ready to go to war. I saw their eyes widened and everyone was unmoving and silent for a second more before chaos exploded on the rocky mountain path.

I recognized Bifur, Gloin and Dwalin, leading the mad charge towards us but, oddly, they didn't scare me at all. Dwalin immediately came to my side and somehow that reassured me some more. His tall, bulky figure that stop just a step from me was already enough to make me feel safer. Gloin had gone straight to Bofur and was already questioning him while my head was still spinning with relief.

"We heard you were captured. What happened?" Gloin asked, voicing the other dwarves' concern but surprising us.

It was fairly easy to see we were shocked that they knew that, all our faces pictured in various ways our surprise. For my part, both my eyebrows raised toward my hairline.

"Did you receive a message already?" Bofur asked incredulity evident in his tone.

"That lad, Hector, he arrived two days ago at night saying their town had been attacked. We thought you'd need help." Dwalin added, explaining a bit more how they'd learn so quickly about the fight.

"We were attacked when we arrived, Fili and Bofur fought to let us escape." Kili said gesturing to me, smirking happily at the older warriors who now circled us.

"We got captured but then we all escaped thanks to Kili and Amelia." Fili replied, smiling widely, throwing one arm around his brother's shoulders obviously proud of him.

"Kili and Amelia?" It was Gloin's turn to sound surprised, though I would have appreciated that he didn't sound quite so disbelieving.

From the pout on his face, I could tell that Kili didn't quite like the astonished tone used by the older warrior either. On the other hand, if anyone had told me last week I would manage to help two dwarves escape from men…well, I wouldn't have believed it either.

"Aye. I must be getting old, being rescued by the two baby of the group!" Bofur's joke made all the dwarves around laugh heartily.

Bofur was soon laughing with his cousin Bifur and some other dwarves I didn't know, while Gloin was smiling proudly at the younger brothers who related with wide gestures the events. Meanwhile, to my utter surprise I found myself crushed against Dwalin's chest.

I really hadn't expected that from the grumpy dwarf.

I started to shiver as I put my shaky hand around his waist, hiding my face in the fur of his coat. I could feel emotions of all sorts bubbling and boiling in my chest and I had to concentrate in order not to let them explode. I couldn't lie though, in the exhausted and distraught state I was in, I was really glad for Dwalin's embrace. He squeezed me lightly and I heard him clear his throat. Apparently he wasn't one for public display of emotions, but the fact that he would do it for me was heartening. After a few minutes though, the poor grumpy warrior couldn't stand the silence between us and spoke.

"You've put my brother in quite a state girl." He grunted.

I peeked at him when I heard that, startled; my exhausted mind misconstrued the words as I started to think about all the worst scenarios possible. Balin was in quite a state. Quite a state?

"In a state? What state? What happened? Is it his heart? He's rather old…Oh my god, please tell me he didn't have a heart attack!" I shrieked, my voice gaining an octave as I spoke.

At that I apparently attracted everyone's attention and all dwarves stared at me both perplexed and concerned by my reaction. They all started to circle us but I didn't see them.

Meanwhile my mind focused on the worst possible scenario. After all, with the past weeks' events, I was rather set on morbid thoughts. My eyes widened in fright. What could a healer do in this world? In my head I saw a vivid picture of the sweet old Balin, his hand clutched on his chest, a painful grimace on his face.

"Lass, are you alright?" Bofur tried to ask me extremely cautiously.

"I've killed Balin…"

I'm not proud to admit I wailed quite pathetically. Had I not been too preoccupied by the imaginary death of the old dwarf, I would have laughed at the sight the dwarves made.

The mighty warriors, armed to the teeth and who were used to face everything and anything were completely dumbfounded at the sight of a short girl having a nervous breakdown. Dwalin was looking around, his fingers barely touching my shoulders, clearly afraid of moving or saying anything more. The poor dwarf was feeling guilty though he had no idea what he might have said to make me react so extremely.

Most of them looked afraid of me, not knowing what to do to make me stop crying.

Bifur was glaring at Dwalin, obviously thinking it was his fault, while Gloin was shaking his head from side to side, sighing. Apparently having a wife did make him slightly more understanding of the situation.

The others were mostly glancing from me to Fili, Kili and Bofur, wondering what could have happened to have me behave in such a way when there was clearly nothing to be unhappy about. My reaction appeared rather extreme and uncalled for as everything seemed to be ending well for us all.

Bofur shared a knowing look with Fili and Kili and the three tried to approach me as I left Dwalin's embrace to kneel on the ground, still crying and hiding my face behind my dirty hands. I wasn't sure why I was crying anymore. In some part of my mind, I objectively knew that Balin was most likely alive in the Halls. But then, why did I cry? Was it simply the relief? Or maybe it was all the pressure, stress and fear I had felt during these past days?

When Bofur put his hand on my back and I saw him and the two brothers kneeling nearby, all the memories of a dead body lying on the floor I had tried so hard to push away menaced to come back. I tried to force myself to focus on something, anything that would distract me. I glanced around feverishly, trying to spot something that would catch my attention and would make me forget for awhile longer. Then my eyes fell on Bofur's chest. Even though his coat was of dark colouring you could still easily see the large darker stain. It reminded me that he had held me after I had just…

Suddenly all the barriers I had put in my head to forget about that night's events tumbled down. I was remembering in vivid details everything that my brain had registered but that I still hadn't analyzed as of yet. Now though I could see the blade plunge repeatedly in the man's back, I saw the blood tainting my hands, my face and my coat. I felt the warm liquid pouring between my fingers. I heard the pathetic gurgle that the man had let out after the first hit. I saw the crimson blood.

I smelt it.

I tasted it.

I felt bile rise in my throat. My stomach churned violently and I desperately tried to stand up staggering away, with one hand clutched firmly on my mouth and my eyes wide but unseeing. I precipitated to the nearest boulder and leant on it to stay standing. My last effort to control my stomach failed and I ended up retching pitifully and rather violently. My stomach was almost empty after all those days walking with barely enough food to keep us going, but it didn't stop me from being sick.

I was somehow aware of hands holding my hair away from my face, while others supported all my weight because suddenly my limbs clearly refused to do the job. My whole body felt like lead and I didn't have enough strength to move it. Once my stomach decided to stop his rebellion, I lay completely numb in the arms of several dwarves, my knees had buckled at some point and I was now kneeling near the boulder. Dwalin mostly was supporting all my weight with one arm on my collarbone and one of his hands around my arm. It was Bofur who helped me hold my head and probably Fili or Kili who took care of my hair, holding them around my neck while rubbing my back soothingly.

I couldn't feel ashamed at the moment, I just felt terribly exhausted as tears poured from my eyes without me having any control of it.

At some point I registered that the dwarves around were trying to talk to me but I just hadn't enough willpower or strength left to answer them or to even listen.

The last thing I remember is one of them trying to help me drink some water but then…

I blacked out.

* * *

The feeling I experienced was probably the strangest I ever felt. I knew my body was slowly coming out of its torpor but my consciousness came back to me first. I slowly felt my mind clear from the dense fog that had obstructed it but my body just didn't respond to me. I wished my eyes to open, yet they remained close. I wished to moan or groan, yet I uttered no sound. I wished to move but my limbs remained lifeless.

But even though the orders from my brain weren't obeyed, my body still managed to overflow my mind with information.

I was lying on the ground but there were probably quite a lot of coats under me because I could barely feel that stone digging in my shoulder. I was warm too, so I guessed the dwarves had put several other coats on top of me too, and probably lighted a fire as well because I could feel the warmth radiating from my left side. Then I could smell the odour of the pine and wood, so we probably hadn't move far from where we had met. I heard discussion going on around me and just knew that several dwarves were sitting quite close to where I was.

Instead of concentrating on their words though, I decided that now was as good a time as it would ever be for my body to finally wake up.

Ever so slowly I managed first to twitch my fingers and if I hadn't been the one suffering, I would have been rather curious about the difficulties I encountered. Who would have thought that moving a hand could become so hard? When I finally managed to move my right hand, I heard the discussion stop and then rushed steps that clearly came in my direction.

"Meli? Meli can you hear me?" I recognized Bofur's voice though I wasn't sure I had ever heard him sounding so worried before.

"Amelia? Amelia if you hear us, then can you please move your hand?" Was that Kili? He sounded nothing like he usually did.

It took me several excruciatingly long minutes to finally open my eyes. My eyelid felt like they were made of stone and my throat was dry and raw. I didn't have to say anything though because while Dwalin gently helped me in a sitting position, Fili brought a water skin to my lips and slowly poured water in my mouth.

I coughed a bit at first but I felt much better afterwards.

"What happened?" I croaked, my memories were completely muddled.

"You…" Kili started but didn't seem to know what to say.

"You lost it for a short while there, lass." Dwalin simply stated, still holding my back with his huge and strong arms.

"Aye, you scared us quite a bit." Fili added.

"You started to cry and then got sick." Bofur informed me while pressing his hand on my forehead. "You got a bit of fever but now it seems gone."

As I listened to them I slowly regained some strength and my brain finally started to provide me with foggy memories. The headache that was pounding behind my eyes wasn't helping either.

"I remember…Balin? Did something happen to Balin?" My brain even if it was functioning normally seemed to have occulted all the previous events.

"Balin is fine lass, right Dwalin?" Bofur quickly said, as if afraid of something but I couldn't quite put my finger on what should worry him.

"Aye, he's just reviewing the contracts."

That puzzled me and didn't help my sluggish thoughts whatsoever.

"Contracts?" I asked with a frown.

"Aye, he's looking for favours men owe us."

That didn't explain anything and it must have shown on my face for Bofur gently added while I tried to massage my temples with my fingertips.

"He's preparing to ask for favours, so that those people helped them come at our rescue. Dori and Ori are helping him apparently."

"Oh"

I had nothing more to add. I was tired, so very tired. My head hurt and I forced myself to drink the fresh water Fili had given me. The dwarves stayed close to me for the next minutes, talking between themselves. Kili only stood up to grab some bowl with warm stew in it. As Dwalin held me, Bofur helped me eat and I felt my cheeks burn with embarrassment.

"Oy, Meli, no need to blush. Nori would have my head if I don't deliver you back in perfect health." Bofur joked.

I smiled a bit at his words but it still didn't help me forget that those two grown men, those two warriors were playing nurses at my side.

"He wanted to come but Thorin forbade it." Dwalin added, but he was talking to Bofur, not me.

Bofur simply nodded understandingly and even though I was curious about this, I really didn't feel like concentrating on what would probably be a serious discussion.

The more I ate and the more strength I finally managed to gather. I had been cautious at first, afraid that putting food in my stomach would just make me sick again. After several tentative bites, I gathered that I was fine and I ate slowly the whole content of the bowl. Soon I could sit by myself again without Dwalin's help. I was grateful to see my body was quick to recover though it also meant that my memories started to clear too. At first I was ashamed and appalled at how I had reacted earlier. Then the more I stupidly thought about it, the more I replayed the events of the shed in my head.

I felt my stomach churn once again but managed to keep the stew down. I swallowed thickly while the dwarves discussed around me. I'll soon break down again, I knew it. I needed to get going and occupy my mind with something else than gloomy thoughts. A flash of red in front of my eyes made the blood drain from my face. I shakily tried to stand up but was halted by Dwalin's large hand on my shoulder.

"We stay here and camp for the night lass."

"But the others." I tried to say, thinking about how our friends in Thorin's Halls were probably worried.

"Look around lass, it's just the five of us. Gloin and Bifur went back there immediately earlier. They'll arrive maybe half a day before us in Thorin's Halls. The others moved towards that town, but that's not important. Tonight we sleep, you all need it."

"Please, Bofur, Dwalin can we go now. I want to go home." I whispered brokenly.

Bofur sent me a sad look and shook his head negatively.

"It wouldn't do you any good to go now. Night has fallen anyway. Tonight we sleep and we'll leave early tomorrow."

At his words I finally realized that the night had indeed fallen though I hadn't paid any attention to it. I just wanted to go home and I didn't understand why we couldn't. Well I wasn't being entirely honest because I knew that I wouldn't have been physically able to do much walking, but staying here while dwelling on my thoughts seemed like a terrible idea. The worst idea ever actually.

"Don't you have something in your satchel that'll help you sleep?" Bofur asked me, surprising me a bit.

"Er…"

I was shocked to realize it took me several minutes to gather my thoughts and answer. Maybe the dwarves were right, maybe I should sleep a bit. I tiredly looked around our small camp and realized that Fili was actually already sleeping. Kili for his part was rummaging in my bag until he brought out my medicinal satchel. I looked at Bofur and could only think about one thing to say at the moment.

"You should sleep too, you've been hurt."

At that both Kili and Bofur smiled wide, toothy grins.

"There's our little Amelia back." Kili said joyously. "Do you want me to wake Fili so he can strip just for you?"

I heard Dwalin choke behind me while Bofur roared with laughter. The dwarf's laughter was short lived though as he suddenly winced and brought his hand on his chest. I stared for a minute at Kili who seemed to be anxiously waiting for something until a retort found its way in my head. I licked my dried lips and hesitated for all but a second. Then I simply smiled softly before telling him.

"You're just jealous."

At that Kili's smile widened and I understood what the young dwarf had tried to do. I gave him a small grateful smile and he nodded. Kili had just wanted to cheer me up, to see I was still there, able to banter stupidly with him about silly things. To be honest I probably was just as relieved as he was when we both realized that I indeed could still tease him.

"Here." The young dwarf said next before handing me my satchel.

I rummaged through it for a bit before taking one small leather pouch and opening it. Oin always told me to check twice to make sure what plant was in the bag.

'Use your eyes and your nose!' He would always say.

So that's what I did. Even exhausted as I was I checked and smelt the plant in the small pouch before I handed it back to Kili.

"Can you prepare an infusion with this?" I told him when he took the pouch. "Just take two, no three spoons of the dried plant in a full bowl of boiling water, please." I instructed and he nodded eagerly. "And please add one spoon of this." I handed him a second pouch that contained dried mint leaves.

Kili smiled before going back to the fire that was rather close. He busied himself with putting some water to boil and I could hear him repeat softly the instructions I had given. While he was occupied the two older dwarves shifted to both face me and Bofur kindly spoke.

"Meli, Amelia, how are you feeling?"

I pondered a bit before I answered as honestly as possible.

"I'm exhausted Bofur. Just…really exhausted." I breathed out shakily. "I want to go home."

"And about…" He clearly hesitated and I felt a lump in my throat.

I squeezed my eyes shut for a second, clenching my fists tightly. I really didn't think now was a good time to think about…that. I knew Bofur was thinking well, I knew he wanted to help, but right now I didn't want to remember.

"I don't." I started before shaking my head. "I can't speak about that now."

My voice had been so low that it was a wonder the both of them heard me. Bofur just nodded but I saw Dwalin's eyes narrow at me. He shrugged and grunted before leaning slightly forward, staring right into my eyes.

"Lass, we understand."

On those simple three words, Dwalin stood and left to sit on a fallen trunk nearby. Bofur patted my knee kindly and told me softly.

"Dwalin is gonna keep watch tonight. Take the infusion and try and sleep, alright?"

"Take some of it too Bofur." I answered before rubbing my forehead with my hand. "Wait. Now we have water and fire, you should probably drink something for the pain."

"It's fine you…" He tried to say but I glared at him.

"I might be tired, but I'm still your healer. Tell Kili to put some more water to boil."

He didn't need to tell anything, Kili had heard me perfectly and was already adding water in the small cauldron that had contained the stew. He then poured the content of the second pan he had used in a bowl and brought me my own infusion. Once more I could tell they simply obeyed in order to allow my mind to focus on anything else besides my own memories. It was sweet of them to be like that, but it didn't work that well. I knew they were trying to keep my mind off certain things so I was completely aware of what those things were. Stupid brain.

Focusing on the matter at hand, I cleared my throat and tried to assess logically what should be done right now. I was a healer. I was responsible of my companions' health.

"You'll have to wake Fili too. He needs sleep and rest, but I'm rather sure he'd be entirely too sore tomorrow if he doesn't drink something now. Actually I should probably prepare a salve or ointment…maybe a poultice could be more efficient."

I was rambling and I knew it. Everyone around knew it. Still they let me ramble and think aloud about what plant would be best to use while I was rummaging around in my bag, still sitting in the same spot. From time to time I would sip my own infusion while looking at the few ingredients I had with me. It didn't take me that long to prepare a blend for them to drink and I still had some ointment left in my small jar. After Kili promised me several times that he would make sure that both Bofur and Fili would redo their bandages, I finally let myself lie down and fall asleep.

The night was short but I was glad not to have experienced any nightmares or dreams of any sort. I had been simply too exhausted. To be honest I still was exhausted. The stress of the days spent running away, worrying about human men coming back to kill us, was finally catching me.

* * *

In the end we rather silently made our way back to Thorin's Halls, walking as quickly as we could. Except for Dwalin, we were all tired but none of us wanted to spend one more night outside of our beds. So we pushed it. Maybe we shouldn't have, but truly, I didn't care. I'd rather be exhausted and sleep for three days straight than be sleeping outside for one more night. I just wanted to be home. I wanted to see Dori and Ori. I wanted to hear Nori call me 'Mizimul' and forget about this whole debacle.

This time around, even the sight of the massive doors didn't manage to stir me from my tired torpor. Even though the night had fallen a few hours ago, the entrance doors were still open, which surprised me greatly. It probably meant that the dwarves were waiting for us, hoping to see us arrive even during the night. Unsurprisingly, Gloin was at the door with a few other dwarves, guarding it.

I didn't react at all and simply followed Bofur, not answering to Gloin's welcoming greetings as the doors closed behind us.

"Thorin's wants to see you all as soon as you come in." Gloin said sheepishly.

Hearing that I sighed deeply. What did the King want? Couldn't he wait a bit? Couldn't we simply go and sleep? Besides, I really had to tell Bofur and Fili to go and see Oin. Even though I had done my best, I had been tired and on the run when I had treated them. It would be better if Oin could check their various injuries at least once.

"Do we have to?" Kili moaned, voicing my exact thoughts.

"Well, he's been furious since the human lad came barging in the Halls. I'd really not advise you to upset him further." Gloin shrugged apologetically.

He was furious? And what about us? We had been attacked and had to run away like prisoners escaping. Couldn't the King just give us one night of sleep? Was it seriously so important that he knew all the details of our ordeal now?

"Does he want to see all of us?" Bofur asked, sending me a worried look.

"Aye. He wants to hear exactly what happened."

"We don't need to be all present for that." Fili tried to protest clearly trying to help both his brother and me.

During all this discussion we had kept walking towards the large room where I had sworn that oath so long ago. The King was there already, talking heatedly with Balin. As soon as he saw us though, he turned around and strode to meet us in the middle of the room. He quickly went to embrace Kili and Fili at the same time and I bit my tongue not to snap at him; Fili was injured, he should be more careful. But the embrace was short lived as the King took a step back, nodded at his nephews and then glanced at me before finally staring at Bofur.

"I've been told some things happened, I want all the details, now." He ordered sharply.

I snorted at that, I couldn't help myself, because that truly was the understatement of the century. The icy blue eyes left Bofur's face to look at me. I met with the King's gaze with my own steely green eyes. I saw him quirk an eyebrow at that but neither of us reacted more than that.

"Uncle, can't it wait a bit?" Fili sounded tired, and I knew he was.

"Fili I'm glad to see you're both fine, but right now, you have to explain yourselves. Tell me what happened."

"Explain ourselves?" I couldn't help but mutter with a frown.

Wait, did he think it was our fault? I thought that the man, Hector, had explained to him what had happened. I had imagined Hector told him that either the peasants were attacked or that they had hired the mercenaries; anything really that explained why the men would attack us on sight. At that moment I remembered the scared look of the woman, her words, and the worry in her eyes. Maybe the peasants truly hadn't hired the mercenaries. But why would mercenaries attack such a small and dingy town? And why would they call us thieves if it wasn't the villagers' own words and worries? My head was starting to ache again as too many thoughts swirled in my exhausted mind. I was brought out of my musing by the King's sharp voice.

"Aye. I want to know what you did to anger those humans."

There was a short pause at that. Alright, what had Hector said exactly?

"Wait uncle, we didn't do anything." Fili retorted, being the first to recover from the surprise.

"I thought a human lad had told you already what happened in that town." Bofur frowned.

"The man is in our jails right now. I can't trust him, much less his words." The King spat.

"So you'd rather believe we did something wrong?" I couldn't help but snort again; I was just too tired to be polite.

Diplomacy could be damned. I was tired and my mind was a total wreck. I had barely managed to push back thoughts of what had happened, I wasn't stupid, I knew I couldn't deal with it by myself. I needed at the very least Nori's arms around me, and probably Ori and Dori too to be able to talk about it. I honestly didn't care much about the King right now, and really, the situation was getting so ridiculous that it was funny.

"I don't believe anything Miss Amelia." The King growled at me while I was surprised to see Balin glare at him. "And that's why I want you all to explain what happened."

"Alright Your Majesty." I gritted through my teeth.

Balin's eyes found mine and I saw how concerned and surprised he was. I looked at Bofur who was staring at me with wide eyes while slightly shaking his head. Apparently the tone of my voice, or maybe it was the words, had shocked everyone because all the dwarves looked at me with various emotions displayed on their faces. I guessed now wasn't a good time to behave like a sarcastic child. Bofur seemed both shocked and slightly scared by my behaviour. I glared at him, annoyed by the situation, before I lowered my gaze to the floor, ignoring them all.

I knew the King was about to retort sharply or at least say something, but I didn't care at all at the moment. I only looked up when I heard noise coming from behind me. I glanced above my shoulder to see what it was as Dori came barrelling through the door, quickly followed by Nori and Ori and a little further away to my surprise, Bifur.

"Amelia! Have you been hurt? Why did it take so long for you all to come back? Why didn't you come with Gloin and Bifur?" Dori's voice expressed how afraid he had been.

My body reacted on itself, I couldn't help it. I evaded Dwalin's hand when he tried to stop me and I rushed to the three brothers. For a second, my exhaustion was forgotten as I wanted nothing more than to be with the three dwarves I had missed so much.

They probably picked up that something was wrong because their concerned yet happy faces turned full worried when I almost literally jumped in Dori's arms. The bloodied front of my coat had probably been a dead giveaway that something bad had indeed happened once again in the lovely town of Gorm. As I wrapped my arms around Dori he quickly put his owns around me, patting my back gently. I could still hear the other dwarves talking behind but I didn't care.

I did wonder though whether Thorin had told them what had been happening or if they had been kept in the dark. But this thought was short lived, right now the only thing that mattered to me was that the three brothers were there.

Nori was just a few steps behind Dori. From above Dori's shoulder I met Nori's gaze. He looked more worried than I had ever seen him. His face was emotionless but his grey eyes were speaking as clearly to me as his voice would have. The emotion was evident in his gaze as it roamed over my face, probably looking for information on what had happened. I saw his brows first rise in surprise then lower into a frown. He must have seen something in my eyes too, I don't know what exactly, but suddenly his eyes turned angry.

He walked to us and patted once on his brother shoulder. I saw Dori glance at him before he released me from his hold. At first I felt hurt but then I understood why he did it.

As soon as Nori's arms brought me against his chest I let my arms snake around his waist. I hid my face in his shoulder, just having the time to catch a glimpse of Ori's worried expression. I closed my eyes and sighed. Nori's arms held me tightly and I was clutching at the back of his tunic. I couldn't be close enough to him. I could smell a strange mix of tobacco and something else, leather maybe. Nori's familiar scent. I strengthened my grasp on him and he reacted similarly, bringing me impossibly close to him.

Being near him, being held by him made a small part of my heart alight with joy. My fears, worries and pain were still brewing just underneath the surface but I could hold them in for a short while longer. That is, if Nori's arms didn't relinquish their hold. I hadn't realized until that moment how dependent on Nori I was starting to become. On him and his brothers.

Obviously this simple moment had to be broken by the other dwarves and their stupid dispute as to whether or not we should discuss the events right now.

"She's barely back and you want to interrogate her?" Dori sounded offended and I gazed up turning my head slightly to look at the scene from the corner of my eyes.

Dori and Ori were placed in front of me and Nori, seemingly creating a barrier that the other dwarves hadn't tried to breach yet. Ori was quite impressive with his arms crossed on his chest and a very determined look in his eyes. My sweet, calm Ori looked so fierce at this moment, and I felt an odd feeling of pride for him spread in my chest. At that instant he looked every bit the dwarf warrior, just like any other dwarf around. He was impressive and he was protecting me…my heart started to swell with gratitude and warmth.

Dori was looking even fiercer. His sleeves were rolled back above his elbows and for the first time I saw the impressive size of his arms. He probably was as strong, if not stronger, than Dwalin. He had crossed his arms on his chest too but he did look way stronger than Ori. I couldn't see his face but from the tone of his voice I knew his eyes were probably glaring at the others, King included. The gratitude and warmth expanded tenfold.

From the corner of my eyes I could see that Bofur and Bifur were standing a little apart from all the others, clearly not intending to take any side in this matter. I couldn't really blame them for that. Fili and Kili were silent too, probably having decided that talking now wasn't such a good idea; what with their uncle currently growling and snarling at everyone and especially at Dori who held his ground unfazed.

Dwalin was now standing beside his King, as was Gloin, and I was impressed by their indefectible loyalty toward our groaning and snarling leader. The surprise though, was that Balin seemed to be on our side this time, trying to negotiate with the King, hoping he could simply wait for the morning before talking with the four of us. I felt suddenly so lucky to have Dori and Balin as my guardians. They were doing their best at protecting me, even from their leader.

I then looked up slightly, trying to see Nori's face.

Nori looked calm. Entirely too calm. It felt odd to see him appear so emotionless when both his brothers were angry. I trailed my eyes on his features, analyzing every little detail. His mouth was set in a thin, grim line, which told me he wasn't so indifferent as he was trying to appear. I then glimpsed at his eyes to see the same tightly reigned fury I had seen a few times only. Nori was a master at hiding his feelings, but apparently this time his emotions were just too strong to be properly hidden, at least for someone who took the time to look.

I shivered and he must have felt it for his eyes immediately looked down at me. In a heartbeat, the thunder in his gaze dissolved and I was amazed to only discern care and concern. There was something else though. Something I couldn't quite place.

My heart skipped a beat but I didn't ponder on it.

For now the only thing that mattered to me was that Nori wouldn't let his anger explode at the King's face. There was no doubt in my mind that he was perfectly able to yell at his leader and I was quite certain too that said King wouldn't appreciate the blunt honesty.

Nori seemed to observe me for awhile, looking and apparently searching for something in my eyes. I hadn't even realized our gazes were locked. I didn't know how much time we spent like this; I was completely oblivious to our surroundings. At some point, he seemed to have found what he was looking for and I was forced to blink at his next action.

Nori winked at me. Nori had just winked at me.

In this whole mess, this dwarf was cheeky enough to dare wink at me.

I couldn't fight against the small smirk that tugged at the corner of my lips.

Nori smirked back smugly in answer.

Strangely I felt as if nothing else really mattered anymore. The brothers were defending me, protecting me, even against their own King. How could I dwell on my pain in such a situation?

I couldn't forget it entirely but a small weight was already being lifted from my shoulders.

Nori squeezed my waist lightly and raised one of his masterfully braided eyebrows a bit, it was barely noticeable and I wouldn't have seen it hadn't I been looking at him directly. I interpreted it as a question about how I was feeling. I nodded ever so slightly to let him know I was as alright as could be and he seemed satisfied with this. His gaze turned stern and icy again and he went back to glare at the other dwarves who were still quarrelling around us.

I closed my eyes tightly and tried to nuzzle closer still to Nori's chest. I felt one of his hands flat against my back while his other one moved to my head. His warm fingers brushed some of my hair away, lightly grazing my neck and I felt my skin tickle a bit. I suppressed a small smile and just sighed. I was feeling so safe. When was the last time I had felt so protected? I could bet that whenever it was, Nori had been here.

At the moment I didn't even hear the voices of the quarrelling dwarves around anymore. It was only when I heard Dís shouting that I peeked up again.

My gaze fell on the princess of our Halls and I would have flinched away hadn't it been for Nori's arms around my waist. She looked furious.

"What is going on here?" Dís shouted above the noise.

The other dwarves stopped talking altogether as Kili bounced and strode quickly to his mother, a huge smile on his lips.

"Hey Ma."

Instead of a hug though, the young dwarf received a slap on the head.

"Ow, what is that for?" He complained, bringing both his hand to his head, rubbing the spot that had been hit.

"Don't 'Hey Ma' me you idiot!" Dís snapped. "Can you imagine how worried I was when this man came in, talking about mercenaries and murders and prisoners?"

She then grabbed her son's right arm and tugged him towards her. It was clear that she had been scared for them. I could see it in the way she tightly hugged Kili, clutching at him as if worried he would go away. In the meantime Fili walked towards them and I saw Dís eyes narrow at the sight of her son's face; the bruises were fading but still painfully visible. I couldn't help but smile when I saw Fili lean a bit forward, waiting for his mother to slap the top of his head, which she did, before she hugged him too.

I glanced up at Nori and saw that I wasn't the only one finding this display both funny and heart warming.

Even though I had found this little scene oddly cute, I couldn't help but cringe when Dís exclaimed next, sounding more scared than anything.

"Is that your blood?" She was looking at Kili's coat before turning her sharp eyes to Fili. "And you too! Whose blood is this, are you hurt?"

I had never seen Dís so…uncollected. But at the moment I didn't really pay attention to it. My mind was once more assailed with gory images I wished I could forget. Blood in itself didn't disturb me. I could go as far as saying that bloody wounds didn't faze me either, unless they happened to be on some specific dwarves. Death was also something I had come to term with. But it was the combination of all those elements with the added factor that I had been the one inflicting the deadly wound in a fit of sheer rage, that made my stomach churn once more and my knees go weak.

I saw black spots in front of my eyes and hadn't it been for Nori's arms around my waist, I would have fallen at that moment.

"Amelia." He breathed out worriedly, tightening his hold on me to prevent me from falling.

At the same moment the others turned to look at me and I only managed to see Dís eyes narrow at me before I closed my eyes. I had to focus in order not to be sick right now.

"Mahal, she's white as snow." Dís said and I guessed the hand I felt on my forehead was hers."Why didn't you bring her home? She needs rest!" Dís asked angrily.

"We would have if Thorin would just let us." Dori snapped then and I opened my eyes weakly.

I could see the dwarves were more or less circling me and Nori. The King was scowling but when I met his gaze I could have sworn he looked concerned…slightly concerned. That didn't stop him from frowning though. Dori was boiling with anger and I would have never guessed that Ori could look so angry. Dís was just next to me and she patted my cheek, forcing me to look at her.

"Amelia, were you hurt anywhere?" She asked and I felt Nori tense.

"She wasn't hurt Ma." Kili provided softly, apparently guessing I wasn't really thinking straight right now.

"She looks hurt to me." Ori retorted.

"And there's blood on her coat." Dori added.

"Oh god…" I managed to breathe out before my knees buckled.

Nori reacted immediately, holding me up while I heard several gasps and a worried cry from Ori. I felt my hands clutch at Nori's coat and I squeezed my eyes shut. Throwing up in front of everyone wasn't really on my To-Do list of the day. I felt bile rise in my throat and tried to focus on anything except that awful feeling, mentally repeating lists of medicinal plants and their properties. I took a deep breath and noted once more the smell of tobacco smoke that seemed to cling on Nori's clothes.

That was as good a diversion as any. Better than the lists of medicinal plants even. I took another deep breath, trying to both calm my stomach and catch a bit of the scent.

"I'll take her home now." I heard Nori say and his voice clearly stated that he didn't care about any objections anyone could have.

He scooped me up in his arms and I instantly buried my face in his shoulder. Without anymore words I felt him start to stride away from the other dwarves. Glancing above his shoulder I saw Dori and Ori still putting up quite a front against the King. I was uncertain as to whether I should be surprised to see Dís quite clearly side against her own brother.

At the moment only a few things truly mattered. The brothers were still there for me, still protecting me fiercely and I couldn't even begin to express how glad I was for that. Seeing them as they stood up against the King had both frightened me and heartened me. I was glad they had acted like this if I were entirely honest.

Right now Nori was taking me away from the whole scene and I was relieved he did it too. I couldn't begin to tell him how grateful I was. But then again I shouldn't be surprised as Nori always took care of me. Except for those months when we fought, I had always been able to count on him. Nori protected me and I relished in the happy feeling and the certitude that he would keep doing so in the future.

Nori and I remained silent while he carried me like a princess back home. I was glad not to meet anyone on our way there, but seeing as I didn't recognize most of the corridors we passed through, I found out it wasn't just luck. Nori was clearly taking a detour in order for us to avoid the curious crowds of dwarves. At that moment I felt more thankful than ever for my cheeky thief's cleverness.

My cheeky thief…

My thief?

My thief?!

Where had that come from?

Nori glanced at me when I jolted slightly in his arms but he didn't say a word.

My mind was once more whirling with one too many thoughts and I had to quickly calm down if I didn't want to have another breakdown. Gingerly I nuzzled my head closer to his neck. Hiding my face in his beard and feeling finally at peace when his particular scent hit me once more.

I would have to think about many things, analyze the feelings and the thoughts, but it could wait.

Right now I didn't want to think about where some words uttered in the safety and privacy of my mind had come from. Right now I just wanted to stay close to Nori and let all the pent-up fear and pain flow away from me. I didn't know how or why, but I had this certainty that Nori would be able to help me put some order in those specific feelings at least, if not the others more incomprehensible ones.

Right now, nothing much mattered beside the fact that I was home…at long last.

* * *

**A/N: Hello everyone! First a HUGE thanks to you all! I'm really so happy to see that you enjoy this story as much as I enjoy writing it!**

**so thanks to every reader, amazing reviewers/followers! Thanks Thanks and Thanks again!**

**Now, I hoped you enjoyed this chapter. I wanted to upload it yesterday, but Wednesdays are rather busy days for me and I was struck by inspiration so I chose to write another chapter instead of editing this one. **

**Even I couldn't be that mean with Amelia, she deserved to have dwarves coming to the rescue, not more troubles :) Though I won't lie, it was tempting to have them caught again by the mercenaries.**

**I'm sorry for those of you who were a bit bothered by the violence in last chapter, I'm sure you understand that I can't let her forget about it quite so soon. It shouldn't happen often but do expect some of it here and there (though I'll try to avoid graphic descriptions)**

**Now, as you can see she's back in the halls and I hope you're all happy with how things are (slowly) moving along in the romance part of this story.**

**As for the lovely town of Gorm...you'll learn a bit more in later chapter(s), though I already hinted at various possibilities. **

**If everything goes as planned, I should be able to update the next chapter late in the afternoon on Sunday (or in the evening)**

**Thanks again for all the support and kind reviews! **


	23. Healer's Hands, Killer's Hands

**Everything belongs to JRRTolkien, except for my OC and the plot.**

* * *

Nori hadn't left my side since he first took me in his arms in front of the King. When we had finally arrived at the door, he had gingerly allowed me back to my feet, one of his arms still around my waist to prevent me from falling down. At the moment I felt as if I had no more strength at all and I was more than grateful for his support as I leant heavily against him. I was tired but that wasn't really what was disturbing me most right now.

Nori had opened the door quickly and had swiftly picked me up again, carrying me through the threshold and into the dimly lighted room. The fire in the hearth was burning low and the bright red embers provided a warm and welcoming glow to the room.

"Do you think you can stand?" He asked me softly, tearing me from my thoughts.

To be honest, I wasn't sure my legs would cooperate, but I still nodded. Seeing my hesitation, Nori walked to one of the armchairs and lowered me slowly to the ground. He let me stand by myself just next to it so that I could sit quickly if I were to fall. My legs shook a bit at first but other than that I managed to stay upright without his assistance. Still, Nori was hovering nearby, ready to catch me, and kept observing me intently.

I took a deep breath in order to soothe my nerves a bit when Nori decided to speak once more.

"You should remove this coat."

I glanced at him and I saw how worried he was. His eyes didn't leave me for a second and he was clearly tense, as if waiting for something bad to happen, preparing himself to react quickly. His concern warmed my heart but I realized that I didn't like seeing him like that. I wanted to let him know I was fine, or at least that I would be.

I managed a small, very small and uncertain, smile at him but it didn't do anything to ease his concern. As his words still rang in my head, I swallowed thickly and looked down at myself. It was fairly easy to spot the dark stain that covered my front where most of the blood had spurted, and then the smaller stains where the blood droplets had splashed. Suddenly my face remembered the feeling of warm liquid being splattered on it and I felt lightheaded.

Immediately as I started to sway on my feet, Nori's strong hands caught my waist and helped me find some more balance.

"Easy there, you should sit down a bit." Nori sounded really scared right then and I found it odd, unnatural even while I felt my legs give away under me.

It was only thanks to Nori that I didn't painfully hit the floor. He gently held me, lowering me slowly until I sat on the ground with my back against the chair.

I could have noticed how cautious and gentle he was being, but at the moment my attention had been caught by my own appearance. The front of my coat was a strange mess of black and dark earthy brown, the fur was stuck in dirty tufts and all in all it was damn easy to see I had killed someone or something. Actually it looked as if I had bathed in the blood of a poor victim.

I shouldn't have thought that.

Why did I think of that?

Oh god…

The lump in my throat grew improbably tight and I my breathing became erratic. I felt the blood drain from my face and large, tangled knots settle in my stomach.

In a pitiful repeat of what had happened in front of Dwalin and the others, my mind drifted away from the present. All the events that had occurred during our escape came back with the same accurate and incredible details; the sounds of the blade penetrating the man's back and neck were playing once more in my ears. I could smell the tangy, coppery smell of blood. I could feel each strike reverberating in my bones.

It struck me then that I had probably resembled a mad, psychotic woman, while I had stabbed this man not once, but repeatedly.

I brought a trembling hand to my lips and managed to mutter while closing my eyes to concentrate on anything else.

"I think I'm going to be sick…"

Nori almost jumped to his feet in a mere second and I barely had the time to register he had left my side that he was already back with a wooden bucket in hands. I bent over it and emptied my stomach as my body was shaking through violent spasms, again.

In a corner of my mind I could feel one of Nori's hands on my forehead and another one holding my hair away from my face. I probably should have felt ashamed that he saw me in such a position, but at the moment my mind was otherwise occupied. His hand felt cool against my skin and I could only be grateful for his help. It took way to long in my opinion for my stomach to calm down and my cheeks were wet from tears when I finally felt well enough to sit back on my knees.

Nori helped me lean back against the armchair's side before he hurried away. He brought me a glass of cool water and helped me drink it. He was holding the glass with me, my hands were shaking rather strongly and I wasn't sure I could hold the cup myself. I was entirely too tired to react or be surprised when I felt his left hand brush away the tears that had marred my cheeks.

The soft caress was so light against my skin I thought at first I had dreamt it. Yet when I managed to focus my eyes, I saw and clearly felt his hand brushing against my skin.

We were both silent but his sole presence nearby was enough to calm and sooth me. When I had calmed down he gingerly gathered me in his arms once more and sat me in the chair I had leant against. His eyes seemed to never leave me for long, not even when he added some more wood in the fire to rekindle it.

"Do you want some chamomile?" He asked softly from his spot near the hearth.

I couldn't help but smile a bit at that. It was so unusual for Nori to be the one asking that. Still it only highlighted how well he knew me. He appeared to relax a bit when he saw my smile and only then did I realize how truly tense he had really been until that moment. I nodded and he quickly disappeared in the shadows of the kitchen.

Left alone for the moment I reclined in the chair and closed my eyes. The events of the past week seemed almost unreal. So unreal in fact that I couldn't help but wonder if they had really happen. But then from time to time the blur of colours and images came into focus, leaving me sick and scared. I remembered how I had reacted after poisoning the villagers; anger and fear had battled for dominance.

Now though I wasn't afraid of the dwarves' reaction: I perfectly knew they would find it rather normal to kill someone in order to protect another dwarf, a friend. I wasn't angry either. I wasn't that stupid; I knew the man was about to kill Fili and I'd rather kill him a hundred times over than let that happen.

No.

I wasn't angry at myself for my actions.

I wasn't angry at the dwarves for being captured either. I knew they had put up a hell of a fight in order to allow both Kili and I to escape.

I wasn't angry at the men either per se. I simply despised and hated them.

Really. This situation was just completely different.

But I was scared. More scared than ever. And what scared me was myself.

How could I not be afraid when I remembered the rage and the madness that had controlled my body for a terrifying long moment?

Who wouldn't be afraid of this sensation?

My thoughts were interrupted when Nori came back. I observed him as he knelt in front of me. I felt as if my mind was wide awake but my body didn't appear to be. I simply looked as Nori slowly worked on the laces of my coat that had been glued and stuck by clotted blood and dirt. He then gently took one of my hands in his and gingerly helped me remove one of my sleeves, then repeating the same kind, almost tender gestures with my second arm. He took the offending garment away from me and I hid my face in my hands, breathing slowly.

Nori though gently took my hands away from my face and it was only when I felt then warm cloth against my skin that I realized he was washing my hands. I hadn't even seen the small wooden bowl full of steaming water until then. I saw that my hands were shaking terribly, but I couldn't actually feel it. Still, little by little Nori removed the dirt and grime that coated them. He was completely focused on his task which allowed me to observe him.

His brows were furrowed in a deep frown, but that only managed to focus my gaze on the braids and beads in them. My eyes then slowly drifted to the other braids he adorned in his weird yet oddly appealing hairdo before I once more stared at his beard. It was so strange. I had never thought anything about beards. In my previous world, it was rather rare to see anyone sport a beard and if they did, it was nothing alike the dwarves' pieces of art. But Nori's beard was just so fascinating for me, so impressive. It was unlike the others, the multitude of braids and that wove together, intertwining, seemed to always catch my eyes.

But instead of staring at the beads that clasped the end of his braids, I let my gaze move up to look at his mouth. Hadn't I be that tired, I would have smiled at the little pout he made at the moment. It is only when my eyes looked at his though, that I felt something start to slowly stir in me. His beautiful grey eyes seemed to always hide some secret. They contained so much mischief and were so tender sometimes.

I blinked when Nori stood quickly without looking at me and I glimpsed at my hands. I hadn't even realized Nori had let them go. He soon disappeared in the shadows with my coat, and came back holding a steaming cup. Once more he knelt beside me and gave me the drink silently.

"Amelia, can you talk to me?" He whispered still so softly as I took the cup.

The warmth of the object seemed to radiate in my hands, chasing the cold away from my tired fingers. I didn't look at Nori and remained silent. I truly wanted to talk, but what should I say? 'Hey Nori, how are you? Me? I'm fine, just killed a huge dude the other day…'

I flinched.

At the same time, Nori had been trying to get my attention by grazing my cheek.

My eyes immediately found him after I had jolted and he had jerked his hand away. I saw a flash of hurt in his eyes and it pained me more than I thought it could.

"Nori" I managed to croak.

It seemed to freeze him on the spot and he waited for me to say something more. He was observing me but his face was once more completely blank.

"I…" I took a deep breath and locked my eyes in his. "I killed someone."

At the sound of it being voiced, tears welled in my eyes. My heart clenched. Nori reacted quickly. He took the cup away from my hands and put it aside. Slowly, as if afraid I would react badly, he cradled my face in his large hands, his thumbs brushing away the tears.

"Mizimul, you…"

He didn't have the time to finish his thought though, because we heard the door open. Nori's hands jerked away from me. I felt the loss intensely, which surprised me greatly. I didn't know I would react like that. Looking up I saw that Nori was handing me the cup of chamomile once more while Ori was coming in the room.

"Amee" Ori exclaimed while quickly coming to my side, engulfing me in his arms.

I smiled. Tears and pain were forgotten. My spirit lifted and I felt at home. I felt fine. Everything was fine for now and I didn't need to worry anymore. For now, I could just relish in the warmth the two brothers so kindly offered me. Nori though did admonish his younger brother slightly.

"Ori, be careful, she's holding a cup."

"Oh…sorry Amelia"

"It's fine." I managed to squeak.

"Do you want to sit here for a bit or do you want to go in your room?" Nori asked me softly.

"I want to stay with you, if you don't mind."

He quirked an eyebrow at me, as if surprised by my words, but nodded and decided to sit next to me. He leant slightly against the small coffee table while he put a comforting hand on my knee. Ori was kneeling at my right, observing me carefully. The two brothers let me finish my cup quietly, soothing me by their mere presence. Nori's hand was softly brushing against my knee and his eyes were fixed on my face. It hurt to see him so worried. Ori wasn't much better, his hands were on the armchair and he seemed to be waiting for something. His fidgeting wasn't discreet.

At that moment, Dori came in quietly and he only glanced at us before sitting in his usual chair. One of his hands was pensively brushing his perfectly braided beard and he remained as silent as his brothers. I couldn't help but note the deep frown on his face and it made me slightly uneasy.

I suddenly had the hunch that they knew what was ailing at me.

And in a second it wasn't a mere hunch anymore.

"You know." I said in a breath, certain about it.

I had told Nori, but there was no doubt in my mind that Ori and Dori had found out after talking with any of the other dwarves, probably Bofur. The three brothers looked at each other and it confirmed my thoughts. They all knew. Seeing that I had started to tremble again, Ori took the cup and put it on the table while Nori stood to sit on my armchair.

"Do you wish to talk about this?" Nori's voice was so low, like a deep rumble, yet I understood him perfectly.

I frowned, unsure about what I should answer, about what I wanted to answer. The brothers were observing me but chose to wait for me to talk instead of forcing the words out. We remained silent until Dori ordered Ori in an exasperated tone to sit down properly and to stop kneeling on the floor. Ori protested weakly as he stood up, claiming he was an adult while Dori simply reiterated his order. Their usual banter made me smirk. I knew they were doing it simply for the sake of habits. They knew it would help me, I didn't know how, but somehow they knew.

These three dwarves were amazing.

They were obviously pretty attentive to my every move. My lips had barely parted that they were all silent, eyes riveted on me.

"I…I killed someone." I took a deep, shaky breath and rambled. "I know it shouldn't bother me, he was about to kill Bofur and Fili. And I know it was more of a self defence kind of thing, even though he didn't attack me. Besides I understand that it's not such a big deal around here…I mean I remember the time when, you know, the men and you, well…"

I didn't look at them, staring at my hands as I was nervously wringing them.

"But he was going to … and I... But I didn't even face him, or he didn't face me." I frowned. "I stabbed him in the back. I literally stabbed him in the back. What does that make me? I'm supposed to heal people, not kill people. And I didn't even think about it, not even tried to stop him otherwise. I directly, purposely ran to stab him in the back…so many times too. And…and I just couldn't help it. One moment he was…and I was…and then…"

I wasn't making any sense.

I realized that.

But the words were just so tangled in my head.

Nori's hand tightened its grip on my knee. The sudden added pressure helped me clear my mind a bit. It was as if his touch anchored me in the present time, forbidding me to wallow in my memories. When I met his eyes I didn't see pity, or disgust or anything of the like. No. his grey eyes still shined with concern.

Dori cleared his throat lightly and caught my attention.

"It is something important. For everyone here and all the dwarves around, killing someone, a human, is serious. Nori cried and refused to speak for days after he killed for the first time a man. Some dwarves never do. Ori hasn't yet and I hope he would never have to. For my part, I remember refusing to eat for several days."

"We understand why you did it. Any of us would have done the same. Your reaction was perfectly normal, natural." Nori added softly and I knew he was trying to appease my mind.

"But you're not healers, and you don't kill people in the back. It is my duty to heal and save people. Not kill them savagely." I insisted.

Nori didn't answer. He frowned and averted his gaze.

"We're not healers that much is true. But as a healer your duty is toward your patient. As a friend your duty is toward your friend. As a ward here, your duty is toward the dwarves. Do you not realize you saved our prince? The heir to the throne?" Dori then asked, his voice even and calm.

Honestly? I hadn't thought of that.

Sure Fili was the heir, the first prince and Kili was the next in line to the throne. But I really hadn't seen them in that way during our journey. Maybe I had offended them in treating them just like I treated Bofur? Thinking back on it, I realized it was unlikely they'd been offended though.

Dori, Nori and Ori were waiting for a reaction. I know I had to go back to the topic. I sighed.

"It's not about duty or who I saved. Dori it's just…look where I come from killing someone, even if it's for all the apparently good reason, it's still punishable and in some country the punishment might be death."

"What? But what if the man was a criminal?" Ori couldn't help but ask with wide eyes.

"Let's say that someone comes and kills my family in front of my eyes, I am not allowed to take a gun…erm, a sword, and go after him to kill him."

"But, it's absurd! If not the family who will punish the criminal?" Dori was astounded.

"The police will catch him and he'll be judged by a tribunal. Well anyway…" I really didn't feel like trying to explain the judicial system in modern Europe. "Let's just say that for me killing someone is not something I ever prepared myself for."

I sighed as I saw how puzzled they were by our little discussion that they clearly didn't seem to understand that much. It was odd for me already to know about those differences. I could only imagine it was for them too.

The silence stretched for several more minutes before I could put some thoughts together. Frowning I tried to explain my reaction to them, not really understanding that they didn't need me to explain. They understood. As Dori had said, even for them it was something grave. Still, this explanation was as much for them as it was for me. Putting those thoughts into words, voicing them, was somehow helping.

So I talked.

"I have always kept in mind I wanted to heal people. I never even thought it would be possible for me to witness cold murder. Death, of course, it's sadly a part of any healer's life, but cold blooded murder is another thing altogether. And this time I was the one doing it. I just…I just can't believe it was me back there. I was so, so angry. I didn't think. I just…acted. This isn't me. I'm not…like this."

Even I could hear the defeat in my tone while my shoulders slumped. Still, I really appreciated the fact that they had all remained silent, letting me express as clearly as possible what I was feeling and not simply dismissing it as nothing. I could see they cared for me. It was so perceptible in Dori's worried frown, and with the way Ori would nervously play with the beads in his beard.

Nori was harder to read usually, but that evening I could see how concerned he was. He was now sitting on the small coffee table next to me, and he had taken hold of one of my hands, gently brushing his thumb over my knuckles. The regular, soft movement allowed me not to fall apart. It enabled me to talk and put some order in my thoughts but reminded me easily that I wasn't alone, that he was there for me.

My heart was swelling with all the affection I felt for those three dwarves.

After awhile in silence, Dori chose to speak once more.

"Amelia, we cannot tell you it's nothing major, because frankly it is. We cannot tell you that everything would be fine or the same, because it won't. We can only say that you won't find anyone here, and by here I mean in Thorin's Halls, who will judge you for what you did."

"This is something you have to come to term with, by yourself." Nori added sadly.

"You have to do it yourself, but just know that…you are not alone. Take your time, think about it, and grieve if you need to, but in the end you'll have to let it go." Dori said softly, he too sounded sad.

It sounded so simple and logical. Yet for me it seemed like an impossible task to accomplish.

"I'm not sure I'll be able to…" I lowered my gaze once more, ashamed.

"Nonsense." Dori immediately replied in a huff. "You're a strong girl. You'll get past this, I don't doubt it. Just take the time you need to put your thoughts and feelings in order."

After that I drank the rest of my chamomile tea, which was cold now. Dori and Nori were smoking while Ori read an old tome. I observed them for several minutes.

Their actions spoke volume to me, and somehow it seemed clearer and more effective than their words.

I was home and everything should be back to normal.

I stayed with them, enjoying the silence, the normality for awhile, but soon enough I just had to leave. I truly was grateful for their support and kindness. Yet, as much as I knew they wanted, they couldn't really help me deal with this. I had killed someone. I had to deal with it. Alone.

The only problem was…I had no idea how.

Tiredly I stood up and slowly walked to my room.

Lost in my thoughts I didn't see their gazes follow me.

It had been such a surreal week. Among all the things I thought would never happen in my life I had been certain that being a murderer wasn't going to happen to me. Well, on the other hand I would never have anticipated stumbling into another world. Still I had real trouble reconciling the person I once had been, and the one I was starting to become.

The changes at first had been rather light and barely noticeable. Well, they had been inconsequential; I had started to smile more, to trust people, in this case dwarves, more easily. I had started to laugh and joke, teasing my friends when they teased me. I had been happy with such changes; I was starting to become more confident in whom I was. My apprenticeship as a healer was going rather well and I had become acquainted with many different people, some of them I could call friends. And then there had been that splendid idea to go out of the Halls' protection.

The whole affair in Gorm when I had poisoned people willingly, actually plotting against them, had been an eye opener. I was becoming different. Was I unknowingly influenced by the dwarves' different morality? Was it this whole weird and dangerous world that influenced my mild character?

I had managed to put aside for a while the events related to the poisoning because I hadn't killed anyone. There hadn't been any long term harm done to anyone and everyone was safe and didn't know better.

And then around a week later I transformed into this berserker, letting rage overtake me.

I couldn't recognize myself, or who I thought I was, in those actions.

The door of my room closed softly behind me and I felt all my strength being suddenly drained. I took a staggering step on the side and let myself slid against the wall. I remained there for a few minutes, staring at nothing but the darkness, when the door creaked slowly opened. I craned my neck to find myself looking at Nori.

He stopped in his steps. He seemed surprised for a second as he looked at me, sitting on the floor. Then he simply entered and closed the door behind him before walking around in the dark. Absentmindedly I wondered how he could actually do anything in the darkness. But then, as a thief, he probably was used to it. I heard him rummaging through some stuffs before he lit a candle on my bedside table. He then turned back to face me and walked until he was at my feet. I wasn't surprised when he crouched in front of me.

"You'll be cold if you stay here."

I numbly looked at him and could only hum in answer. I saw him lift his right hand towards my face and he gently brushed his fingers on my cheek. My heart reacted weirdly at that but I ignored it once more. I'd have to remind myself to ask Oin for plants to help stabilize heart rates.

"Mizimul" He whispered his fingers still slightly stroking my cheekbone, "Come on, you should try and sleep."

I let him gently take my hands in his and he helped me up before guiding me to my bed.

"I don't want to sleep." I complained softly.

"You're sounding exactly like Ori did when he was younger."

I smiled at that but it didn't really last. I sat on my bed but refused to let Nori go. He was more stubborn than me though and before long I was lying on my bed with a thick blanket to keep me warm. Nori was about to leave when I jolted in a sitting position and caught his hand.

"Please, can you sleep with me tonight?" I blurted out.

Then my brain whispered to me that it might not be such a great idea to ask that quite so bluntly to a man while lying on a bed in a dimly lit room.

Nori sputtered some sounds that probably were supposed to be words but didn't quite get out of his mouth in the right way.

I couldn't see Nori's face properly but if he felt anything like me right now, his cheeks were probably red with embarrassment. Then I suddenly realized how long it had been since the last time I actually got embarrassed like this and it made me chuckle. The slight relief was much needed and I wasn't about to let it go so quickly.

Sensing somehow he was astounded, both by my demand and my laugh, I jokingly told him.

"I swear I won't ask you to braid my hair."

At first he tensed. But then it worked as I hoped it did. Hearing Nori's soft chuckle made me shiver and I squeezed the hand I was still holding in mine.

"Please." I insisted. "I just don't want to be alone right now and I know I won't be able to fall asleep."

Nori didn't move nor did he utter any sound. He seemed to be undecided about what to do and I murmured softly.

"Nori…I know if I close my eyes now, I'll see all of it in my sleep."

I didn't need to precise I would probably wake up screaming also, Nori knew just as well as me how terrible my nightmares could be.

"Alright" He finally whispered.

He then proceeded to sit at the other end of my bed. He was leaning against the wall and his feet were dangling on the side of the bed. I blinked at the sight.

"You're joking right?"

"I beg your pardon?" He asked much too politely.

"Nori please, can't you just, I don't know. Lie next to me?"

"It wouldn't be proper." He frowned and crossed his arms over his chest.

"What? You've held me in this very bed often enough." I replied.

Alright, that didn't sound quite proper. I blushed and could see his cheeks turn into a darker shade as well. He cleared his throat and avoided my eyes.

"It's not the same thing. It was to help you after you had nightmares."

"It's exactly the same." I whispered and to my utter shame my voice broke when I continued "The memories...I can't push them away Nori." My voice was barely audible as I murmured. "I'm scared."

I don't know if it were my words or the way I had sounded, completely defeated and frightened, but Nori's eyes snapped to mine. He observed me for all but a second and then quickly crawled to lie just next to me. The bed wasn't large but there was just enough space for him to fit between me and the wall. He let his head fall on the large, comfy pillow and he gently brought a hand up to caress my hair. He was still atop the blankets but I pushed them a bit lower to my waist so that I could turn to face him and put an arm around him.

His own arms seemed to find their place easily, sneaking around my waist and he brought me in one swift movement to his chest.

I was certain the position we were in right now would not be considered proper by Dori but I truly didn't care. I was lying on Nori's chest and his arms were holding my waist and back tightly. My head rested once more just below his beard and I put my hands on each of his shoulders.

I let a shaky breath out and closed my eyes. I moved my head a bit and it was now lying under Nori's chin, on his chest. I could hear his strong, relatively quick, heartbeat. I didn't know whether he did it on purpose or not, but I could feel one of his hands apparently absentmindedly brush random figures on my back.

I sighed contentedly and closed my eyes.

After awhile spent like this, I half opened my eyes and realized the dim light was actually dimmer now. The candle was clearly burning so low that I could barely see. I wasn't uncomfortable at all though. Quite the contrary actually, and slowly, very slowly I drifted into sleep.

* * *

Sometime later, it was Nori's voice that finally broke the terrifying nightmare I had.

"Khul, Mizimul, it's just a dream…"

His soft rumble murmured in my ears as his arms encircled me, preventing me from trashing around, managed to wake me. I blinked several times and I felt one of Nori's hands leave my back to brush the tears away. I choked a bit and looked at him, realizing only then that the candle was still lit. I searched his eyes. His grey eyes that so often observed me were now filled with worry. I felt my lower lip tremble. I was so weak. I needed him so much and only seemed to bring him worry.

His hand was still on my cheek when I buried my face in his chest.

He held me tightly, humming a soothing tune until I calmed down.

After long minutes had passed, I stammered pitifully.

"It was really awful Nori. I was back in that shed, but this time I was too late. Bofur and Fili were…and it wasn't the same. I didn't feel the rage. I remember I somehow found the man who had... He was…bound, helpless. And then I saw myself stab him, torture him really. He yelled. He yelled so loudly and I was…I was laughing and I felt like I was so happy…I'm a monster. Nothing but a monster." I was almost sobbing now.

Nori started then to caress my hair before whispering some words in Khuzdul. He sounded weird though so I tore myself from him, just enough so that I could crane my neck and look at his face. His grey eyes looked right back at me. Hurt and concern was what I could see. Something else. There was something else too. It took my breath away to look at his eyes.

I had to blink and force my gaze away.

"Mizimul, you're not a monster."

I felt a few tears blur my vision once more and roll down my cheeks. Just like he had done a few minutes ago, Nori grazed my skin with his knuckles, effectively brushing them away.

"You know you're not a monster, you're not evil. I've seen many evil creatures and you're nothing like them."

"I don't feel…I don't feel evil, but I feel like something's wrong. It's not…I'm not supposed to be like this."

He took some time to answer, clearly pondering on his words.

"It's…well, killing a human being is going to change something in you. It changes you. But it doesn't change who or what you are. It certainly doesn't change what made you before. It only adds one more detail."

I tried to smile softly but it might have come out more as a grimace of some sort.

"You sound a bit…cheesy, you know?"

I glanced at his face. He chose that moment to wink at me. It warmed my heart and he didn't say anything while I shifted a bit. Suddenly nervous I sat, looking at my hands that were now resting on my thighs. I felt him shuffle next to me until he was sitting too, his back against the wall. I knew he was observing me and my reaction, patiently waiting for me to talk. I swallowed thickly and refused to look at Nori before speaking.

"My hands…with these hands I poisoned people. I know now it wasn't such an important thing. But then I took a life in the worst, most gruesome way I can imagine. I killed someone with these hands. They were supposed to heal, to stitch and operate. How can I be a healer still? My hands are tainted. I'm not suitable…"

I looked up and my gaze was immediately locked to Nori's.

Ever so slowly, without breaking contact between our eyes, he kindly took my hands in his as he leant towards me. My heart skipped a beat when I felt his lips press soft and gentle kisses on my knuckles. His breath tickled my skin. My own breath was caught in my throat.

It took the sound of his deep voice to break me out of my numb daze.

"You are the most suitable person I know. It's natural to feel the way you do right now. Just…give it time. Give yourself some time."

I couldn't resist the urge to be in his arms at that moment and he let me lean against him. I put my left arm around his waist and my right hand on his chest. Automatically one of his arms encircled my waist too while his other hand held mine. Tears rolled on my cheeks while he started to hum a low tune. He rubbed my back and let go of my hand. He brushed away the hairs that were stuck to my face by the tears before he once more kindly brushed the tears away.

Apparently I couldn't stop crying that night.

Surprisingly, I felt better quite quickly. I remained silent for awhile, savouring this moment that belonged to just the two of us, noting absentmindedly that I really liked how he lightly brushed his fingers on my cheekbones.

My mind drifted to another thought that I just couldn't push away. It started to nag at me and I couldn't fight against it. I had to ask Nori.

"Nori, do you…" I bit my lip and hesitated. "Do you think my actions were, you know, repulsive."

I knew it was a stupid question. Still, I had to ask it.

Immediately, his arm tightened really strongly around me and he growled his answer.

"Mizimul, I'll personally hurt anyone, anyone, who'd say that."

I gasped at the fierceness and controlled anger in his voice. He forced me to crane my neck and look in his eyes. I could barely see him anymore in the dying light of the candle. He looked at me sternly, his face serious but once our gazes locked I saw him relax slightly. He let the hand that had been on my cheek previously fall to his lap. Meanwhile his grey eyes hadn't left my green ones.

He was the one who looked away first this time and then he whispered to me that I should try to sleep again. After some more pleading on my part, he agreed to lie next to me once more. After all I had just had a nightmare and was still shaken by it, even though Nori had managed to calm me.

We remained silent in the near darkness and it felt slightly awkward to lie next to Nori but with a space between us.

After some time, I stupidly wondered whether he was asleep or not.

I slowly rose a bit, arching my back to look at his face. His eyes were closed but, either because I had woken him by shifting or because he simply wasn't asleep, he opened his right eye and looked questioningly at me.

I blurted the first question that passed through my mind. I truly didn't care much, I simply wanted to talk with Nori and almost whatever topic would have been fine.

"Do you have to redo your braids every day?"

He looked slightly surprised until a slow, lazy smirk graced his features. He snorted before answering teasingly.

"Wouldn't you like to know?"

I smiled at his antics. Shook my head slightly and playfully hit his chest. He winced, though I knew perfectly well I couldn't have hurt him with that light slap.

"Come on, don't tell me it's another huge secret. How often do dwarves braid their hairs? It can't be such important information that I have to ask Thorin about it."

He chuckled at that before brushing one of his fingers against my temple.

"You just called him Thorin, I hope you realize that." He said, smirking cheekily.

I rolled my eyes and naturally, without even thinking about it, crossed my arms on his chest, resting my chin on them. Nori just as naturally put his right arm around my waist and was now using the other to prop his head in a position where he wouldn't need to crane his neck to look at me.

"Well…I did spend some time with his nephews. Surely it allows me a slip once in awhile." I lightly said.

"It'd be closer to the truth to say you saved his nephew's life."

"I couldn't have done anything without Kili you know." I answered blushing.

"You did fight trained mercenaries for his nephews' sake and that's quite an important gesture for us dwarves. You know that." He calmly replied though I could feel him tense a bit as he spoke of the men.

"How could you possibly know they were trained mercenaries?" I asked frowning a bit.

"That's what the man, Hector, told him."

"Thorin allowed you in his council room when he talked to Hector?" I was truly surprised, Thorin did seem to appreciate Nori but there was a certain edge to it, as if he didn't fully trust him.

"I…have my ways."

"You have your ways? What does that even mean?"

He didn't answer but his smirk grew sneakier and I couldn't help but be entirely certain he had somehow found a way to listen to everything. I was sure he could spy on the King's council room.

"You sly little dwarf." I breathed out with a smirk of my own.

"If you don't mind, I'd rather be called clever and stealthy. And please, avoid using 'little' when talking about me."

I chuckled, it felt so right being here, joking with Nori. Somehow his presence next to me was enough to keep my worries at bay. It even allowed me to joke about events that would otherwise make me cringe at their mere thought.

"Does Thorin know you have a way to spy on his council room?" I asked half serious and half teasing.

"Why would I want to spy on him?" He replied evenly.

"You tell me."

He sighed deeply and looked into my eyes, suddenly very serious, as if to convince me of his honesty.

"I do not spy on Thorin. I never did and never will. But that day was different. I knew the man had come from Gorm, where you went, and he had looked alarmed. The lad almost barrelled into our halls like a bull. I had to…well, anyway I was lucky to find a way to…listen, and I will tell Thorin about it tomorrow."

I nodded simply and we remained silent for a while more before I chuckled and said.

"You still didn't answer." I chastised playfully.

He didn't answer, simply humming.

"How often do you have to redo your braids and starfish hairdo?"

I slowly lifted my hand and poked at his hair, wondering how he made it stay that way, I had seldom seen it without it. Now that I thought about it actually, the only time I had seen Nori without his starfish on the head was when he had been wounded, many months ago.

Nori seemed to have only picked one word out of my whole question.

"Starfish?" He repeated arching an eyebrow.

"Starfish. You know…those weird star shaped fishes. A starfish."

"Oy."

He grinned, obviously not upset or offended by my little nickname for him. I chuckled and slapped his finger when he poked my shoulder playfully.

I didn't know how or why it felt so nice being here, joking childishly with Nori, but it did. It wasn't only the fact that I felt safe with him. No, it wasn't just that. There was something else.

When I was with Ori, I felt as if he was the brother I had never had. We talked and talked endlessly together, both immensely curious and both simply happy to share time. Ori would still pick out his notebook and write whatever I would explain about my world, from religion to mechanic, from music's stars to technology. Anything was interesting for him. Still, more than once he had shown me that he wasn't a child or a young adult like I was. That he hadn't been either of those in awhile. After all, Ori was a dwarf. An adult dwarf.

My relation with Dori was different. Dori wasn't a brother. He was like a friend, a godfather, an uncle. I might one day even go as far as saying he could be here, what my uncle had been in my world, a third father of sort. Dori was the strong presence in the background, the one I knew I could go to. He was there to listen whenever I needed to and was wise enough to let me choose my path. Though he had to battle against his protective instincts most of the time.

Nori on the other hand…

Nori was something else. He was there, always. Silent and strong. Fierce and kind.

Nori was not the one I would go to if something was wrong, Nori knew when something was wrong. I still cringed when I thought of that awful period when we didn't talk to each others. Strangely and thankfully, we hadn't gone through such a quarrel since then. Even with all this mess that had occurred recently, he hadn't been angry at me and I was immensely glad about it.

In the end nothing mattered and he was one of the three dwarves I trusted most and held dearest and closest to my heart. In the relative short time I had been here, they had managed to become something akin to family. Even Nori was a part of it, though I couldn't quite place him in any given role.

Nori was the one who would remain silent until he'd make some cheeky comment and chuckle softly. He was the one observing everyone around and quickly grabbing what he wanted from the others' plates. He was the sneaky thief who would hide in the shadows and observe what was happening around. He would pop out of nowhere and smirk, and wink and just be Nori.

I didn't understand him. I really didn't. But in a strange way I didn't seem to need to. I couldn't understand why but it didn't bother me. Nori was Nori. And that was more than enough for me.

We both stayed silent, still holding each other as if it was the most natural thing to do, and maybe it was. I knew perfectly well that Nori hadn't answered my questions but I didn't mind. I closed my eyes, relishing in the feeling of his warm hand brushing lightly on my back. I snuggled a bit closer to him. And he let me. There was no more light and the room was swallowed by complete darkness.

I wasn't afraid.

My head rested on Nori's chest. My arms held his sides. His strong arms encircled my waist and I felt safe. I was safe.

Soon enough I was lulled to sleep by the sound of his breath and heart beat.

Sleep couldn't evade me any longer and I was glad.

I was fine.

* * *

My eyes fluttered open quite slowly. My mind was still clouded by sleep and the remnants of a dream that eluded me now. I tightened my hold on the warm body lying just next to me and sighed contentedly. Then my eyes snapped opened to see a well known braided beard that tickled my nose.

The events of the previous day rushed through my head and I blushed.

Then I realized what position I was currently in.

Oh dear.

* * *

**A/N: Thanks a lot to all the wonderful reviewers and the new followers! **

**Mary: Thanks :) it's very nice of you to say that. I hope this chapter didn't disappoint.**

**Lilly: I know I made Thorin a bit cruel...but well, he can be rather rude and harsh. I hope there was enough care from Nori in this chapter XD**

**And thanks to the nameless guest who reviewed too ;) it's very nice of you.**

**Sooooo I hope you all enjoyed this chapter! After that, who can complain about a lack of Nori? ;) I'm sorry if some of you felt it was too fluffy but well...what can I say, I wanted some more fluff, so that chapter came up. ****I really hope this chapter didn't disappoint anyone! **

**I know it's shorter than the previous chapters but I guess you understand why I wanted to cut it here too ^^ **

**For those of you who are curious about the mercenaries...I can only say you'll have answers, here and there in the next chapter and in later ones (as usual).**

**I'll try to update soon, but honestly I don't think I'll be able to update before Thursday. I have a busy week coming and I'm not sure I'll have the time to edit next chapter. **

**Thanks everyone for your support!**


	24. A Healer's Doubt

**Everything belongs to JRR Tolkien except for my OC and the plot**

* * *

Well, apparently both Nori and I had moved during our sleeps.

Yep. That we had.

I was no longer sleeping on his chest. Though I wasn't sure whether this was better or worse. Well, it wasn't anything bad per se, just a bit embarrassing. I wasn't used to wake up in someone's arms.

We were now facing each other and we had managed somehow to entangle the both of us in the thick blanket. Had we rolled together in it? My legs were completely tangled with his and, even though it wasn't uncomfortable, I still felt a bit nervous at finding that one of my legs was between his. His strong arms imprisoned me against his chest and I could feel it rise and fall in time with his breath. His chin was just atop my head, his beard was probably half disappearing in my hair.

What did surprise me most though was the way my fists were clenched.

I was clinging onto him quite tightly too, as if I didn't want him to go away in my sleep. One of my hands was between us, clutching the tunic on his chest, while the other had glided its way behind his back. My fingers there were tangled in his mane of hair and I couldn't help but think about how soft and long it was.

It really wasn't the moment to ponder on that though.

Still, I couldn't help it. For a second I closed my eyes and forgot about everything.

I lightly brushed my nose against his chest. My mind was blank. I could only think about how I felt at that very instant. However strange this position was, it still felt somehow right.

I felt safe.

But then I blinked and reality crashed back. I didn't know exactly what would happen when Nori would awake, but I was quite sure he wouldn't feel comfortable with our position. And I bet if Dori was to enter the room now, he'd have a heart attack from the sight. We were quite…tangled after all. I couldn't even move my legs, the blanket and sheet were so tight around us that they were glued to Nori's.

At that realization I did feel slightly awkward.

I had never been in such a situation and had no idea what to do. Logic though told me I should simply roll away from him…

Or at least try.

I started by letting go of his hair and let my hand lightly skim along his spine to his waist. I unclenched my other fist and let my hand lay flat on his chest. My eyes opened wide at the feel of his warm skin under my fingers. Apparently I had clutched his tunic so tightly that I had managed to open it in my sleep.

I couldn't stop the blush that burnt my cheeks.

I felt his heart beat under my palm. It was steady, slow. It brought me some peace. I used it to focus on something other than the warmth in my cheeks.

Cautiously I slid my other hand from his waist to his chest and started to shift away.

I startled slightly when I heard Nori mumble something in his sleep. I couldn't stop the soft squeak that escaped my lips though when his arms tightened their hold on me and brought me flat against him.

Then to my utter horror, I felt Nori shift and I knew he was about to wake up.

Well, there was nothing to do about it now.

I could feel him shift some more before one of his hands slowly started to brush against my back and slid in my messy hair. I heard him mumble something as he buried his face in my hair too. I could feel his lips graze my skin and it sent tingles all over my body. They moved slightly as he muttered something, bringing me impossibly closer at the same time. My heart skipped a beat. Several actually as the hand still on my back started to caress it, sending shivers up my spine.

And then he suddenly froze.

Yep. He was awake.

I couldn't help but smile when I felt him try to untangle his hand from my hair, obviously being cautious not to wake me. I decided that maybe making light of the situation would help us both forget about our embarrassment.

"Nori?" I simply said.

I immediately wished I didn't though. As soon as I had uttered his name, Nori jolted, almost jumping away from me. Doing this though he only managed to tear a few of my hairs away from my scalp, which made me yelp, and tangled ourselves some more in the devilish blanket.

"Mahal!" He exclaimed while jerking away from me as if I was infested with the plague.

"Oy! Careful, I'm almost bald now!" I complained loudly while rubbing at my scalp.

I chanced a glimpse at Nori, he was redder than ever and currently busy with freeing his legs from the cover. He didn't look at me though and I had a feeling it wasn't a good sign. As he was finally able to move, I sensed he was about to bolt for the door and I just knew it wouldn't be good to let him leave like that. My chest tightened.

I quickly grabbed his wrist and yanked on it, forcing Nori to sit back on the bed.

"Let me go Amelia." He immediately said, looking anywhere but at me.

"Nori" I sighed. "It's no big de…"

"Here it is." He snapped, interrupting me.

"Seriously?" I groaned. "Nori, I don't care what you think. I needed you here last night. I hadn't slept peacefully in days. Days Nori! Granted, most of that time I was on the run but still. It matters more to me that I could sleep without nightmares than any talk about what his proper could."

Nori didn't say anything, simply looking at the door and I sighed, annoyed.

"Fine. You think that helping me is something shameful? What do you believe? That it's not honourable or something stupid like that?"

"Amelia it's…" He started to answer harshly but I didn't let him finish.

"In my eyes you didn't do more than what a friend would do for someone he cared for. You always say you don't want me to hurt, but I do Nori. It hurts like hell to even think about what happened. You gave me respite for one night. One night. That's how I see it, and I'm immensely thankful for that."

My voice had become a whisper at the end of my little speech and I released his wrist. Nori didn't leave though and we stayed in the silent room for several minutes before he spoke. He cleared his voice first and then whispered softly.

"I'm glad I helped you, but you have to understand…for an unmarried man and woman to share a bed like we did is…" He seemed to hesitate then. "It's just really frowned upon in our society. Especially for the woman."

No kidding? Women should be faithful and remain virgins before their wedding and men should not? How unoriginal. I rolled my eyes but listened to what Nori had to say.

"If it were to be known that I spent the night with you." He paused then. "No proper suitor would court you if they knew you had spent a night with a man. Especially a man like me." He muttered those last words almost inaudibly.

I could have laughed. I really could. What did he think? That I had a queue of suitors dying to ask for my hand in marriage? That I waited for them? And what about that last part? It was just idiotic to say something like that. Nori was a good dwarf. I knew it; surely I wasn't the only one. Seriously the silliness of this dwarf was astounding sometimes. Besides, I couldn't believe that someone who would love me wouldn't trust me and truly, nothing had happened. Such ways of thinking were so archaic…oh right, middle age era. Damn. Why couldn't I end up in some futuristic world?

"Nori" I said to end this discussion. "I do not plan on getting married. You can't just ignore me because of something that's unlikely to ever happen. I don't want to quarrel with you on that. Nothing happened except for you supporting me and that's final."

My words didn't seem to appease him as much as I had planned so I chose to resort to joking. It usually woke Nori from his angry and stubborn daze.

"Besides, what dwarf would like to marry a beardless woman like me?" I chuckled softly.

At that, Nori's gaze turned to look at me. For the first time in a long while I couldn't read anything on his face or in his eyes. He was entirely expressionless, blank, his eyes veiled. That surprised me. I stared at him questioningly when he sighed and finally decided to answer.

"Fine. But it won't happen again."

I stared back at him, looking straight in his eyes and saw how serious he was about this.

"Alright." I finally relented unhappily.

We remained awkwardly silent until he stood, walked to the door and simply asked.

"Can I leave now?"

I felt a slight pang of hurt at his emotionless tone and silly question, but I didn't let it show. I slowly stood up too while Nori didn't move. I was still wearing my rumpled clothes but I didn't care. I made my way toward Nori who was like frozen. Arriving at the door I paused for a second and tilted my head on one side.

Then I quickly leant forward and kissed Nori on the cheek, just above where his beard started. He jolted, eyes wide, and before he had the time to reply or react, I whacked the back of his head.

"The first was to show my appreciation for your help. The second, I hope, brought some sense in your head."

I snorted at seeing Nori completely flabbergasted, staring at me with wide eyes, mouth agape and rosy cheeks. It was a funny and cute sight. I didn't wait for him to gather back his wits and just turned toward my trunk, looking for the dress I would wear that day while he quickly got out. My heart was beating a bit quicker than usual, which surprised me, but I didn't really mind. The feeling that accompanied this rapid heartbeat was unusual but pleasant. Really pleasant, even though I had no idea what to name it and truly didn't feel like thinking about it now.

At that instant I just wanted to relish in it. Thinking about feelings could wait. I would have to sort them out soon, but not this morning, not now.

Shaking my head at my own silliness I crouched near the wooden trunk. I wanted nothing more than to take a long, warm bath but I knew I would have to wait until that afternoon at least, when they would light the heaters in the bathrooms. I was hungry and realistic. Now was not the time to joke around with Nori, nor was the time to sleep in hot and bubbly water…now was the time to face the world and the consequences of my recent actions.

I was wondering whether I should use the cold water in the small basin in my room to at least freshen up a bit when someone knocked lightly at my door.

"Amee?" I heard Ori's uncertain voice.

"Yes? What is it?"

I opened the door, surprised to see him holding a rather large cauldron. I looked at the cauldron and then at Ori whose cheeks were a bit more rosy than usual.

"I, that is, we thought you might want some warm water to…wash a bit." He blabbered and I smiled.

"Are you telling me that I stink Ori?" I teased him while leaning slightly on the door.

"What? No! It's just you're a girl and girls like to be clean and we thought that you're a girl too..."

"Ori stop." I laughed hoping to make him breathe. "I was just joking. It's actually really nice and thoughtful. Thank you a lot."

The both of us managed to pour the hot water in the basin where it mixed with the cold one. After Ori left me, I was able to 'clean' and was once more immensely grateful for the dwarves' thoughtfulness. I sighed contentedly when I felt the warm, and now soapy, water wash away a bit of the dirt and sweat of the past week. Using a wet cloth was far from the comfort a true bath would provide, but it was still damn good.

Then after putting some fresh and clean clothes on, I walked toward the kitchen, cringing when I heard loud voices. There clearly was an argument taking place around the table. Instead of barging in like I often did, I chose to stay in the shadows of the corridor, hidden by the door, as I listened to what was happening.

It sounded like a repeat of the previous yelling match they had a week or so ago. A shiver ran down my spine, I hoped the King wouldn't try and send me away once more to Gorm. This time I didn't care about my oath or the consequences, I wouldn't go. No discussion.

"You saw how upset she was!" Ori's voice said angrily.

"What you're asking of her is just plain cruel. Let her rest today at least!" Dori exclaimed.

"I want to talk to her Dori, not send her back. I want to hear from her too what happened…" The King sounded extremely exasperated.

"You're not sending her anywhere anymore!" Nori growled.

"What I order her or what she decides to do doesn't concern you Nori." The King snarled back.

"She is my ward! Of course I and my brothers are concerned by her well-being." Dori said coldly and I knew he was trying to contain his anger.

"You already heard Bofur's, Fili's, and Kili's versions. Why do you need to hear hers now?" Wow, Nori sounded even worse.

"Because…Kili told me she went in town alone after the others got captured. She might know more about…" The King seemed to talk to children at that moment.

"She what?!" Three voices yelled in perfect harmony.

I closed my eyes, cursing both Kili and the King. Now I had the dreading feeling I'll get quite an earful very soon. Damn the dwarves and their over protectiveness.

I stepped in the kitchen before any more shouts could be heard and tried to sound joyous as I greeted everyone. I did freeze for a second though when I realized that there were far more people around the table than I had thought. I had only heard the brothers' and the King's voices and I had assumed that he was the only one visiting the three brothers. I had been wrong.

Completely silent but still there, eating their breakfast, were Oin, Dís, Gloin, Balin, Dwalin and Bofur. I blinked several time while they all observed me, waiting for something. I guessed that after my little stunt in Dwalin's arms, it was quite natural for them to believe I would shatter to the ground at the littlest breeze.

Well I didn't want to.

My pain was my own and I felt already slightly ashamed to have let so many dwarves witness my breaking down. I liked them all, but there was no arguing with the fact that I truly felt completely comfortable and at ease with the three brothers only.

I swallowed and forced a cheery smile on my lips.

"Hello Dori, Nori, Ori." I said to each of them.

I walked toward Dori and hugged him quickly whispering 'Thanks for the water' in his ear. He patted my back and smiled at me. I was glad I had managed to cool down a bit of his anger. It wouldn't do to have the dwarves yell at their King for too long, I didn't think he appreciated it.

My eyes took a look around the table while Ori served a huge portion of food on an empty plate next to him and I guessed it would be mine.

The King was here, sitting at one end of the table, and his face was set in an even grimmer frown than ever. Next to him, at his right Gloin and Dwalin looked ready to kill someone; their frowns were matching that of the king. The three of them seemed ready for battle and it scared me a little.

Sitting next to the warriors, Oin and Dís were eating peacefully, though they would from time to time send a glare in the King's direction. Bofur was sitting with them and I wondered whether he was trying to disappear under his hat because I had never seen him holding his head so low. Balin was on the King's left, losing his frown just for the time he needed to smile warmly at me.

Dori and Nori were standing just behind their brother, and I was now next to them. There was enough space next to Ori for the four of us to sit comfortably.

But at the moment I wasn't really thinking about comfort. The silence was starting to unnerve me greatly and I really didn't wish to be reminded of all the negative feelings I had been feeling for days now. The brothers, Nori mostly, had managed to calm me and had helped me greatly. I was now in a relaxed state, well as relaxed as anyone could be after having killed someone.

I shook my head, pushing such thoughts away and then greeted everyone, hugging the dwarves closest to me. That meant everyone except Dwalin, Gloin and the King. I wouldn't dare hug a King. But I didn't think twice about sharing a long hug with Dís who had stood up at my approach and another longer one with Balin.

"Balin. Oh, I'm so happy you're alright." I breathed out.

"I'm glad you came back unharmed too, deary." He said while patting my back. "But why wouldn't I be alright?"

I blushed and heard Dwalin cough loudly behind me. Stepping back, I realized that Balin and the three brothers were looking at me curiously. Bofur, that damned cheery dwarf, started to laugh loudly.

"Well" He said smiling. "The lass thought Balin was dead when Dwalin told her he was in a right state thanks to her. She didn't take it well, utterly broken. Think about how my brother reacts if he's hungry and we steal his food…that's about how much she panicked."

I couldn't believe I'd ever blush more than what I did at that time. My face was burning with embarrassment while Dwalin just shrugged. Balin, the sweet man he was just patted my cheek before I complained.

"For god's sake Bofur, can't you just shut it for once?"

"Nah…you'd be bored without my charm." He replied with a lazy smile.

"I don't think so…" I retorted through gritted teeth.

"Oh lass, you're breaking my lil' heart." I rolled my eyes when he clutched his tunic above said heart.

"Deal with it." I deadpanned.

"I think I'll manage, for your sake only, I know you'd miss me terribly."

"I'm really glad you're alright." I told Balin, choosing to ignore Bofur for the time being.

"Well, well, I'm perfectly fine deary, don't worry. This just proves I'm still the brighter of the two brothers. I don't go around scaring everyone." Balin sweetly replied.

"Shorter you mean." Dwalin snorted.

I took a quick glance at the King and immediately noticed that he didn't really seem to appreciate our silly banter. I quickly shut it and sat between Nori and Ori while Dori brought me some warm tea and sat on Nori's other side. We all remained silent for awhile and I was about to start eating a bit when the King broke the silence and talk to me.

"You saved my nephew's life and greatly helped the other. It isn't something to take lightly. I owe…"

"With all due respect, Sire, you don't owe me anything. I didn't do it for you." I could have bit my tongue off.

My eyes widened as I stared at my cup of chamomile. The room was silent and I held my breath. Why had I interrupted him? How could I talk like this to him? Seeing as the silence lingered, I glimpsed at the King, expecting to see him furious at my disrespectful behaviour. The shock I received almost made me startle.

How could a King look pleased when a little girl would say something like that in his face? This man was a real mystery to me. He was incomprehensible and he behaved in no regular or logical patterns, at least none that I understood. I personally was astonished and embarrassed at my own lack of decorum. Anxiety apparently made me stupid.

"I'm sorry…" I apologized lamely but he apparently didn't care about it.

Waving a hand to stop my apology he chose to change topics instead, indicating clearly that the matter of thanks and apologies was closed definitively.

"I wanted to speak with you about the events. If that's alright with you of course…"

This tone was so different than the one he had used when I had left for the second time that it made me frown. He had sounded rather angry and rude last time, now he seemed almost…apologetic. He wasn't exasperated either, as he had been while talking with the brothers. No he was polite and almost kind.

After hearing his question, I took a quick glimpse toward Dori, Nori and Ori, and felt a cold shiver ran down my spine. The looks on their faces clearly indicated that they had just remembered what the King had said just before I entered the room.

Ori looked simply concerned, whereas Dori was clearly disapproving of whatever might have lead me to go back into the town on my own. I gulped when I turned to face Nori. He looked deadly. I swallowed thickly and attempted a sweet smile at him. His glare told me I had better have a damn good reason to put myself in danger willingly.

"If that's alright with you, Thorin, we'd like to hear it as well." Dori calmly said, though his eyes didn't lie, he wasn't happy at all.

"Well, I think we'd all like to hear about that." Balin confirmed while looking at me rather sternly, though he was calm.

At the same time, Bofur seemed to shrink a bit on his seat, his earlier smile completely forgotten. It didn't take me long to realize that Nori was glaring at him. At the moment though, I was more worried by all the stern looks I was getting. Somehow I didn't think the dwarves would approve the plan that Kili and I had concocted while we tried to find out where the others where.

To my horror, the King nodded, agreeing just like this to send me to my death.

Damn him. Damn the dwarves. Damn their protectiveness.

Was I repeating myself?

Anyway I took my time eating, while the dwarves discussed various unrelated topics. Nori's gaze though clearly displayed he knew I was trying to play for time.

Had I not been in a room with so many dwarves around, I'd have moaned and whimpered at my sudden lack of luck.

Seeing as I had stopped eating, Nori devilishly smirked and spoke in an overly sweet tone. Oh dear, he was pissed. Really pissed…

"So, would you care to explain why you decided to go back in that town after knowing Fili and Bofur were captured."

"Because, we didn't know whether they had been captured or not." I blurted out nervously without thinking.

I shouldn't have put it quite like this; I realized it the second Nori's gaze turned from angered to furious.

"You're saying you went there, knowing that these people might have killed Bofur and Fili? You went there knowing they might kill you on sight?!" Balin seemed stunned.

Hem…How to say yes, without actually saying it?

Nori was fuming; I could swear that there was actual smoke leaving his ears. Dori looked ill and Ori was extremely pale. Balin was eyeing me with huge eyes while Oin shook his head disapprovingly. Dís' face was carefully neutral and I wasn't sure whether she would approve of my actions or not. Dwalin and Gloin were both looking at me sternly, clearly not agreeing with the idea to have a woman endangering herself so stupidly, and Bofur shrank some more. The only one who was looking remotely normal was the King, and even he was glaring at me in obvious anger.

I looked at the ceiling, as if it held all the answers, trying to escape from their gazes. The silence in the room was simply suffocating.

"See Nori, that's exactly why I want to hear her." The King said sternly.

I sighed loudly. How was it possible that both Kili and I forgot about the others' reactions? It should have been obvious that they wouldn't like it. Well, if I were honest, I would admit that Kili had hated that plan and had tried to change my mind about it numerous times. Remembering his words I wondered for a second whether Nori would indeed kill him. But I was soon obliged to focus on the matter at hand. Looking at the angry faces around I swallowed thickly the lump that was forming in my throat before talking.

"I can explain…" I attempted rather weakly.

"Go on." The King said.

And thus I started to retell our tale.

* * *

The past hour had been tough. I had to recall everything that happened and the dwarves had listened intently. Well, almost everything. I hadn't said a word about Kili teaching me Iglishmêk, he had almost begged me not to divulge this information to anyone. No one had stopped me to ask questions and I had thus spoken almost non-stop for a full hour. I had just finished talking when I saw them all exchange glances before their eyes locked onto me once more.

"This was an incredibly dangerous plan Amelia." Balin was the first to talk and though his voice was soft, I knew he wasn't happy, at all.

"It was stupid of you to endanger yourself like this, lass." Gloin added.

"Stupid? It was suicidal." Dwalin snorted, eating a piece of bread.

I looked at Nori who refused to look back at me and Dori who was clearly unhappy.

"We really had no other choices at the time." I tried to amend but it didn't convince any of them.

"I'll deal with Kili accordingly." The King then said, ignoring completely my comment.

Dori nodded and the other dwarves remained silent. I looked at Dís for guidance but her face was still totally blank. I frowned. What did he mean by 'deal with Kili'? I remembered the young dwarf's comments once more and I suddenly felt angry too.

"You will do nothing." I said coldly glaring at my empty plate.

I had no idea where that had come from. Truly I didn't know how I could talk like this to the King without feeling fear at his reaction. The dwarves looked at me, all surprised and shocked by my reaction and the tone of my voice.

"What did you just say?" The King asked me emotionlessly.

"I said, you will not punish Kili in any way."

"He was responsible of your protection. He is a dwarf, he should know better than to send a woman into danger."

"Right. With all due respect, you weren't there. What would you have done? Run back here for backup? That would have been a stupid loss of time. Send Kili in that town? Great idea, if you don't mind both your nephew being kidnapped and killed. What other option did we have?"

"You should have waited…" Gloin stubbornly muttered.

"Oh, that would have been such a good idea." I said sarcastically. "Bofur, can you remind me how well you were treated by those mercenaries? I'm sure they provided food, comfortable lodging, and probably some nice entertainment too."

"Enough girl." The King growled. "The fact that your presence in the village was useless was proved. You went there for nothing, endangered yourself for nothing. Had you and Kili simply taken the time to analyze the situation instead of acting recklessly like stupid children, you wouldn't have needed to go in that town and put your life at risk."

I felt myself blush terribly at his rant. Of course he was right. After all the two dwarves had been held prisoners far from town, had we known this, we wouldn't have tried to find information in the village. Still, I didn't appreciate being treated like a child and berated like some silly girl. Suddenly my shame and anger made my thoughts shift. A few weeks ago I had willingly poisoned people for the dwarves. Several days ago I had killed a man for the dwarves. I wasn't proud of this, far from it, but I had still done the deed. I had survived both encounters and had proven to everyone that I was useful and resourceful. They had absolutely no right to treat me like this.

"Stop. Calling. Me. Girl." I enunciated angrily as I stood up slowly.

They all looked at me with various degrees of bewilderment showing on their faces. Even the King's eyes reflected his surprise at my sudden anger.

"I poisoned people for you. I killed a man for you. I'm not a child!" I shouted those last words angrily.

Images of the few times I had let my anger burst out sped through my mind. I could see myself in the small dingy house in Gorm, breaking and throwing things around. I could see the knife plunging in the man's back. Nausea menaced to distract me but I managed thanks to some miracle to settle my upset stomach. I simply stood and banged my closed fist on the table, rage masking the pain that shot through my arms. I saw some of them startle a bit though I could tell that Dís, Nori, Balin and Dori where observing me intently and strangely calmly for Dís at least.

"It is my life. If I want to risk it you have no right to say anything. It is way too easy for you all to say what we should have done once we're all safely back here." I managed to talk calmly, evenly now. "If you want to comment, fine, do it. You have experience that I don't, and I welcome your advises. But I won't listen to you berate us as if we're stupid children. Our actions are proof enough that we're not. Unless you believe that saving Bofur and Fili was a mistake. In that case, be my guest, kill them now."

At that I took the knife I had used for breakfast and handed it, handle first, in the King's direction. No one spoke. They all looked at me strangely but none of them spoke at that moment until Dís cleared her throat and decided to add her voice in the debate.

"My dear brother, once more you see how wrong you all are to treat women like you do."

"Dís, don't start." The King groaned.

"Thorin, we are fine with being protected, but you have to admit that we are not necessarily helpless or useless. As Amelia said, she did in the past month save quite a large number of your warriors, and she proved her strength. She has never been trained, she isn't used to this world, and yet she has proved to you how useful and resourceful she is. She proved herself. She made no mistakes in Gorm."

"Dís, you know that's not the point."

"Actually I think Dís is right." Balin said, clearing his throat and shocking everyone. "We all assume that Amelia endangered herself needlessly, but in all truth, Kili and her didn't have much room to act. Their deduction that Fili and Bofur were being held in the cellar was sound. Their plan was clearly risky, but even then, the fact that Kili remained hidden did provide them some security. As far as I can tell, had Amelia not been safe, but instead locked in the cellar too, Kili would have tried and probably managed to save her and the others."

"And what if she had been killed on sight?" Dwalin grunted.

Then the dwarves all started to talk together, arguing whether Kili's and my plan was utterly stupid or actually rather good. Apparently the fact that we had tried to plan anything was already considered rather good because Kili tended to react and not think. Still, the King, Gloin and Dwalin weren't convinced.

In the meantime, I felt Nori's hand on my arm and he tugged lightly to make me sit once more.

"I don't care for the reasons. You put yourself in great danger."

"Nori, I had no choices…" I replied sadly, knowing he was angry.

I tried to touch his forearm but he yanked it away from me. This actually broke my heart and scared me all at once.

"You promised Amelia…" He whispered to me, looking both angry and hurt.

I felt all the remnants of anger I might have melt away. Guilt replaced it. It hurt me that I had hurt him.

"Nori I..." I murmured while the others' angry shouts covered our discussion. "I'm truly sorry."

"You promised you'd be cautious Amelia." He repeated and the anger was almost gone from his eyes, replaced by hurt and betrayal. "You weren't." His tone was final, and he was right.

"Nori." I tried to speak.

I wanted to explain to him that I truly had felt as if I had no choice.

But I couldn't.

Because Nori stood up and left the room silently.

None of the others saw him stand and stride noiselessly to the living room. Though I didn't hear the sound of the door, I just knew that Nori had left completely. I could only hope he would come back and talk to me. I would try everything to make him talk to me and listen to me. I wouldn't let our relationship fade like it had months ago. Not ever. That had been another promise and I wasn't about to break that one.

My heart clenched painfully at the thought of Nori actually refusing to talk with me. What would I do then? Suddenly the simple notion that he might not talk with me seemed more dreadful than anything else. I blinked back tears and tried to focus back on the dwarves' discussion. They were still yelling at each other. After awhile the dwarves started to calm down, though it did take several long, very long minutes, approximately half an hour actually.

"Well, there's nothing to do about it anyway. It's too late to change anything." Balin sagely concluded and I was glad that this stupid argument was over. "I just hope that you would take better care of your health next time." He added, looking at me as I nodded.

"What next time?" Dori exclaimed immediately and I could sense another heated argument.

Not wanting to listen to their yells anymore, I chose to ask the first question that crossed my mind.

"What are going to do about this?"

The King looked at me gravely and answered in a gruff voice.

"We sent a group of warriors there already. I will have to talk to this human lad once more."

"Human lad? Hector you mean? He's still here?" I was surprised to hear that, I didn't think the dwarves would like having such a guest.

"Aye, that boy might have been telling the truth." The King answered pensively.

"If that's the case, we'll have to apologize." Balin commented.

"Apologize? What for?" I felt my eyebrows rise to my hairline.

"Well, we did put him straight in a cell when he told us that some mercenaries were in that town, planning to attack dwarves." Gloin explained almost pensively.

"What?" I turned to Balin, hoping he would elaborate.

"He arrived several days after you all left. He told us men had arrived in town. From what he said, the men's leader asked about dwarves and, when the master told him about our deal and our delivery, the leader killed the master. The lad told us he had run to Thorin's Halls to ask for our help and inform us of their presence." Balin explained as if it really was natural to react in such a way to such news.

"And your first reaction was to put him in jail?" I couldn't believe it.

"That's what I said." Dís nodded at me.

"Dís…" The King sighed exasperatedly.

I wondered for a moment whether I should laugh at how ridiculous this was or if I should be truly appalled that their first reaction was to imprison the messenger. I could understand that this kind of message wasn't really welcome but still. I felt slightly bad for Hector. He had been one of the few reasonable men during our negotiations there, and he had taken risks to come here and inform the King about the mercenaries. This just highlighted how terrible dwarves were when it came to diplomacy.

I shook my head, ignoring the heated argument between the King and his sister. It sounded more like a siblings' thing than something I should pay attention to.

After a while though, they stopped arguing. As no one spoke I took the time to ponder my next action. I hadn't had the time to think this through. It was a harsh decision that I had thought about when I first came back from Gorm. Now though, with everything that had occurred in that town it seemed like the logical step to take. I knew it would cause quite a stir around me but I knew that was what I needed to do. Well, at least I thought and was convinced I needed it.

Right now, I didn't care much about the dwarves' opinions, except maybe for the three brothers. I knew myself enough to be aware of what needed to be done.

Dori had been right. Nori too.

I needed to give myself some time. With time I would be able to put it all behind myself.

Possibly.

But I couldn't go back to how things were before I left just now. I wouldn't be able to sort my feelings and thoughts properly. I needed some time away of everything.

I inhaled deeply and looked up around.

The dwarves weren't shouting at each other anymore, merely grumbling here and there and still arguing about who was right or wrong. I cleared my throat once, trying to get their attention, but it obviously didn't work. I stood up and finally took a deep breath before clapping my hands loudly. All their eyes immediately riveted on me.

I cleared my throat once more and sat back.

"Excuse me, there's just one more thing I'd like to add."

I looked at each of them and felt a slight blush creeping up my cheeks. It felt a bit awkward to have them all stare at me. I chose though to only look at the King, for he was the one I needed to speak to.

"I wish to ask you whether a change could be added in both the contracts I signed."

I shifted awkwardly on my seat before squaring my shoulders as I heard a few mumbles and I continued. I knew that most of them didn't understand what I wanted yet.

"I will not work in the healing wards anymore. Not for awhile at least and maybe not ever. I hope you'll understand." I said quickly.

This time the reactions weren't silent at all and Ori was the first and loudest to talk.

"Amelia you can't! You can't give up that! You were so happy to learn in the wards!"

"Amelia, surely there is another way…" Dori tried to argue.

"Amelia, you are a bloody good healer, you can't give up that lass." Bofur finally decided to speak up.

"Can't you all just shut it!" Dís shouted louder than the others before looking at me. "Amelia, you saved my son and I'll be eternally grateful for that. You killed a man and I understand it might be difficult for you to deal with that. But don't waste your talent over such a thing. I understand how you might feel but…"

"No you don't." I shook my head. "You don't and it's alright. It is. I need time. You're all probably thinking I'm over reacting and you might be right. First the poisoning and now this…" I closed my eyes for a second before talking again. "I don't regret my actions Dís. If it meant saving them I'll do it again. But still, that doesn't change how I feel. I'm a mess. And right now I'm sorry but I'd rather concentrate on me and my needs than on yours."

After a short silence, Balin was the one to speak.

"You changed my dear."

I quirked an eyebrow at that, not sure of how I should interpret such a statement. Of course I had changed, what did he expect? The King was the next to talk.

"I might have misjudged you." He stated calmly before nodding and adding. "I'll see to it with Balin and Dori that your wishes are respected, the modifications in the contracts will be written today."

At that he stood up, nodded and simply left the room.

"You were strong back there lass, both times. I'm sorry it didn't end well for you." Gloin stated before nodding at us and leaving.

Dwalin soon followed, but not before he nodded at me and said.

"You'd do a good dwarf."

After his younger brother disappeared behind the door, Balin turned his gaze and seemed to appraise me for a short moment. He nodded to himself and cleared his throat.

"I'll be going too. I have to check those contracts. Well, that and make sure Gloin free the poor human lad." Balin stood and came to pat my shoulder as he whispered to me. "Take your time my dear, I'm proud of you."

I felt a lump in my throat at hearing his acceptance and support. I couldn't speak at that moment and simply nodded, looking at his back while he went out. In the end I was left with the people closest to me, save for Nori who still hadn't come back. Oin looked grumpy and decided to finally voice his opinion.

"I don't agree with your decision. Sure as a healer I can understand the conflict you feel, and I'm angry at those idiots for not seeing how upset it made you." He glared at Bofur at that. "But you shouldn't give up on who you are because of it. The poisoning? That was nothing you should worry about. Killing that son of a troll? That was a damn good thing. By Mahal you should be proud!"

"Oin is right. Amelia, I wished you'd think some more about it. It isn't right for you to give up. What does it even mean? You're a healer. You can't stop to be one even if you want to. What would you do if Ori got sick or if Nori got hurt during one of his stupid expedition again?"

"I'm not giving up Dís, Oin. I wouldn't refuse to help anyone in need. If anything major happen, you know you both can count on my presence in the wards. But for now I just want to take some time and think about it all. I can't think clearly right now and it's not fair of you to ask me to act as if nothing happened."

"You're running away! We don't run away and you know it."

"Maybe. Maybe I'm running away from my problems, but you tend to forget something Dís. I'm no dwarf. I'm allowed to act cowardly."

Dís and Oin both sighed and in the end they agreed with me. Bofur had been strangely and unnaturally silent during this whole discussion and in the end he just stood up and left, simply nodding at us and not uttering a word. After a short while Dís and Oin left too and I was once more alone with the two brothers. We were all silent for several minutes until Ori spoke.

"Where is Nori? When did he leave?"

"He…left while the others were arguing." I said while staring at my plate.

We remained silent for a few minutes before Dori spoke in a kind tone.

"Balin is right, you changed."

"What does that even mean? Of course people change, it's nothing worth noticing." I replied slightly exasperated.

"You are not the little lost girl we found in the wild anymore, that's what they mean." Ori explained while standing up and starting to clean the table.

It was a bit odd to hear Ori call me a little lost girl, I tended to forget he was old enough to be my grandfather. I looked at him and tried to smile but it didn't really come out right.

"You would never have stood up to Thorin at first. And you barely spoke your mind anyway. Now you behave more like a dwarf than you seem to realize." Dori added standing up at the same time I did to help Ori.

"I'm no dwarf. I'm just a human girl who got lost in another world. Until a few days ago, I could at least say I felt like I had a purpose here, I felt I could do some good. But now here I am, killing and poisoning people around."

"Amelia…" Ori tried to interrupt me but I kept talking nonetheless.

"I'm a healer no more. I have no right to be one." I sighed forlornly and rubbed one hand on my forehead. "What was the point of all this… this madness." I felt slightly desperate at this point.

"One day, several months ago, you told me that people needed to take their own decisions, needed to make mistake even if it hurt in order to change and grow. You'll get over the pain you feel and it already changed you." Dori said softly.

"Yeah, so what? Sure it changed me. And I know it was a mistake to poison them. I knew it'd hurt me. Just like killing that man is hurting me. There's nothing to help me grow in this kind of pain."

"I don't agree with you. The poisoning, it wasn't a mistake; it was a very hard choice. Choosing to go against your beliefs… it was anything but cowardly. Having to make such kind of choices doubtlessly made you grow up. And killing this man? That was simply your instincts, and the fact that you unconsciously chose to protect dwarves simply highlight that you are one of us. You were brave and loyal Amelia. Any dwarf would be proud to call you kin."

I looked up and stared at Ori. He was frowning deeply, obviously having chosen his words carefully. Dori was looking at his youngest brother and I could see from the corner of my eye that he was proud of him. That at least made me smile a bit.

"I'm sure you'll soon find it in yourself to forgive your actions." Ori added.

I swallowed the lump that was forming in my throat. I couldn't be so certain myself.

I shivered at the thought.

Still they didn't understand why I could hurt so much over such a simple thing.

Sure Dís and Oin understood a bit; for a healer to hurt willingly innocents and then kill someone in a fit of rage? That wasn't supposed to happen.

Still, Dori's words played in my head over and over again. "Your duty was to the dwarves."

Was it as simple as that? Was it only a question of duty?

If anything these people, in this era and world, believed my acts had been right. Right because I was trying to defend their own, my own. Right because I was helping my own.

"I understand, I think, what you're all trying to make me see. I understand but I can't agree with it. Not right now. I just need some time to…to make peace."

They both nodded with their faces serious and I knew they would give me all the time I need.

At the moment though, my thoughts were miles away from trying to deal with this pain. Nori had left and I had no idea where to find him. Will he come back soon? I truly hadn't thought about the promise I had made with him. It had been an honest promise, but during the events, I simply hadn't been thinking about keeping myself safe as much as finding and rescuing the others. All my thoughts had been focused on saving the others, helping them, rescuing them from the criminals who had attacked us. I had been concentrating only on their safety and protection.

I had to protect my friends, my kin.

I froze slightly. When you put it like that the murder almost sounded less terrible…

I shook my head violently. I wanted to slap myself. Nothing. No nothing could excuse the blood rage that had made me kill a man. I hadn't been entirely myself at that moment, but even that wasn't a viable excuse. I had killed a man. That was it.

I didn't have to find excuses now.

No.

I had to reconcile the person I thought I was with the person I was in reality. And truly that was much, much more difficult.

Still, right now, only Nori should matter. Only Nori mattered. He had left. I thought for a moment that maybe I should go out and try to find him. Except…I had no idea where to look for Nori.

I didn't find Nori. I never needed to. Nori always appeared when I needed him. He always found me.

It was rather sad and hurtful to realize I didn't know that much about him.

I didn't even know where he might go when he was angry or upset.

There was no need to dwell on this now though, it was too late and Nori had already disappeared. The only thing I could do was waiting. As annoying and terrifying as it sounded, I had no other option but to wait.

And so I waited.

During the whole day I stayed in the living room, in my chair, my legs bent with my arms loosely encircling them. I kept my gaze glued to the door. I had no illusion about the fact that Nori could very well enter in the room without me noticing him if I didn't keep my eyes fixed on the only entrance.

It was rather late when the door creaked open. Dori and Ori were in the kitchen, chatting together, talking about some contracts from what I heard while preparing diner. Dori had insisted that I deserved to relax and had all but banned me from the kitchen area while they cooked. To be honest I didn't mind much at the moment, I was more preoccupied by Nori than anything else.

As soon as I saw Nori's silhouette, I jumped to my feet and rushed to him. He had seen me obviously and he waited for me there, standing next to the now closed door. His face was completely blank and he was staring at the fire in the hearth. It hurt more than I thought it could to see that he so blatantly avoided looking at me.

"Nori, please listen." I whispered.

He didn't react in any way so I swallowed thickly and decided to talk. His cold demeanour pained me horribly, scared me as well.

Was he going to keep ignoring me like this?

Was he so furious, so hurt, that he would rather not talk to me at the moment?

At the thought of all those months we spent not talking, I felt my heart broke.

I couldn't let that happen again. Never!

* * *

**A/N: Well, first of all a HUGE THANK to every reviewer! I got all happy when I received your reviews :) Thanks everyone for the amazing and kind support! Thanks to all the readers/ followers too! **

**Thanks Mary! ^^ I'm glad you enjoyed the chapter. Don't worry, even I can't be so mean all the time with Amelia :) So yeah...there would be a few light chapters ahead.**

**I hope you all enjoyed this chapter too and that you're not too surprised by Amelia's decision. (Well, I hope you're surprised but not angry about it) Maybe you can guess what's going to happen now.**

**I'm sure some of you still have questions about the mercenaries...I swear you'll have answers, I haven't forgotten about them.**

**As for Nori and Amelia's relation, I hope you didn't expect me to start writing about fluff only :P As I said numerous times already, it's going to happen but later and really slowly ^^**

**Next chapter is going to be rather long, but I'll try to update during the weekend. Probably late Sunday.**


	25. Of Dwarves' Promises and Food Fights

**Everything belongs to JRR Tolkien, except for my plot and OC**

* * *

I grabbed his arm, afraid he would leave as soon as I would talk again. Suddenly all the words I had wanted to say were lost in my mind. There was a lump in my throat and I simply couldn't talk. What was there to say anyway? I had broken that promise and it had hurt him. Saying sorry didn't seem to be enough.

I understood clearly that Nori had taken this promise really seriously. It was once more something very different between this world and mine. How many times had I used the words 'I promise' carelessly in my previous life? How many times had I broken said promises without even realizing? How many times had I cared about those broken promises? Here though I could see that it wasn't something you did. Once you gave your word you kept it. Once you swore and oath, you lived with it. Once you promised something, you did your best never to break it.

I had broken mine.

Nori was right to be angry at that.

We remained silent for several minutes and Nori didn't even glance in my direction. I couldn't read any emotion on his face, and his eyes were hidden from my view.

I didn't know what to do, much less what to say.

Everything seemed meaningless.

In the end I stepped closer to him and my hands that were gripping his forearm slid down to hold his hand instead. Gingerly I slipped my fingers against his palm and squeezed slightly. He froze completely at that. I closed the gap between us and rested my forehead on his shoulder, still holding his hand while he refused to face me.

I bit my lip and closed my eyes.

"I'm sorry." I whispered though my voice sounded strange, even to me, thick with worry, pain and regret.

He didn't move for awhile and then he sighed. I lifted my forehead and took a glimpse at him and saw him frown deeply while rubbing his forehead with his other hand.

"Amelia…" He finally murmured and I held my breath. "Do you realize how dangerous it was?"

His voice sounded so tired that I took a step back, still not letting go of his hand and looked at him. I met his grey eyes and they conveyed how exhausted he was, how worried he had been, how scared maybe too. He deserved my honesty.

"I know it was dangerous. I know. I knew it all along Nori. Kili and I fought over it during the whole day and a good part of the night too."

He didn't react and I took it as a sign I needed to continue to explain.

"But we truly had no other idea and I really didn't believe they had been killed. I didn't rush there just for the sake of it. I really thought I would be fine."

"You simply hoped they had not been killed. You hoped it would be fine." He retorted at that moment.

I was honest enough to know he was right and I admitted it shamefully. Nori sighed once more but I talked before he could.

"If you had been there, instead of me, you would have tried something too. I had to do it Nori. I had to take the risk. It was worth it."

"In the end you just endangered yourself…"

"I promised you I'll try not to take any risk, and I swear I did my best to reduce the danger."

Nori didn't answer and just looked away once again. He was going to ignore me. My heart told me that Nori really was angry against me and fear crept in my heart. I feared what Nori could do. His silence would haunt me more than anything else, except maybe for his absence. I bit my lip strongly and finally decided to resort to a very low tactic…pleading.

"Please, Nori." I looked up at him and spoke in a barely audible whisper. "I can't have you hate me. Please I'm so sorry, I don't want you to avoid me, or be angry with me. I don't want a repeat of last time."

The tears that gathered at the corners of my eyes weren't faked. I did feel like crying at the thought of Nori avoiding me again. I wasn't trying to play the little damsel in distress, even though I believed such an act could be rather effective with dwarves. No, I wasn't playing an act at all. The fear I displayed, the hurt I showed were all real. Right then, I wasn't thinking about acting or dwarves' weaknesses, no, right now all my attention was on Nori. Only and solely on him.

He groaned and pinched the bridge of his nose with his free hand. I didn't move, holding my breath, waiting for him to take a decision.

"Amelia you are the most annoying person I've ever met." He growled lowly.

I blushed at that and just couldn't resist; I immediately replied.

"Oy, you're a dwarf, surely you know someone more annoying than me."

A miracle happened just under my eyes. I saw a small smirk tug at his lips and disappear just as quickly while Nori finally turned to face me, scowling. I should have been put out by his angry frown, but to tell the truth, I was much too happy that he would look at me. That seemed rather pathetic…

"I spend my time worrying for you, because you..." He emphasized on that last word before continuing. "… spend your time running after danger and problems. Do you know how worried it makes me? Can't you understand how I… we feel about you endangering yourself. Do you want to actually kill me or my brother?"

I blinked.

"But…I'm not doing it on purpose." I stammered, surprised.

He sighed, clearly exasperated and tired. He glared at me for a second but I could see the anger melt away in his grey eyes. In the end I could only see concern left in his gaze.

"Mizimul, please be careful from now on…" He gently squeezed my hand before taking a deep breath and continuing. "I can guess you'll soon leave on various missions and I can't follow you and protect you for most of them. Thorin will not allow it."

He looked so sad, so helpless at that moment that I squeezed his hand, though I didn't realize I was doing that at the time. I frowned at his words and asked him immediately.

"Why would I go on missions? I'm quite fine staying here for a bit."

It was his turn to frown when he answered.

"Well, Thorin will probably ask Balin to put your healing skills in our list of mercenary services. Oin could do it, but is usually so grumpy with humans that it's no use sending him. And Dís just doesn't do these kinds of things. So I guess now that they have you…" He trailed off clearly unhappy at the prospect of me going away on mercenary missions.

"But Nori I…" I started and frowned. "Wait. Don't you know? I…" I hesitated once more, unsure of how to end this sentence.

'I give up healing? I'm a coward? I'm too scared to continue? I feel like I'm a failure?' Was one of those expressing what I was trying to say?

"What should I know?" Nori asked.

"I will not work in the healing wards for quite awhile. I told everyone I didn't want to be a healer anymore, well for the time being at least."

I would have thought that Nori would be annoyed at me for doing this, for abandoning healing for awhile. I had anticipated that he would be grumpy and would voice his opinion without restrictions. Well it turned out that I was wrong. Completely wrong. I was as far from the truth as I could be and it just proved that Nori knew me more than I thought he did.

After I had spoken, he had simply looked at me attentively, observing my face before locking his gaze on mine. I couldn't see any disappointment, annoyance or disapproval in his grey eyes. There was only acceptance. Immediately I felt a huge lump form in my throat but I ignored it. Nori then simply nodded, humming slightly like he often did.

"Take your time." He just said.

We remained silent for several long minutes and in that time I had turned my gaze to the floor. I couldn't help but think that Nori still hadn't forgiven me, and he hadn't said anything much. His words hadn't really registered in my brain. I was too nervous about his overall reaction to actually pay that much attention to details. In the end I heard him sigh once more and he made to turn away, probably planning to go to his room. I bit my lip and called to him as he was about to enter the kitchen. My voice was still barely above a whisper.

"Do you forgive me?"

It made him pause. He didn't turn to look at me but his head did tilt in my direction and I had to concentrate and focus hard in order to hear his answer. Not seeing his face unnerved me a bit. I wanted to be able to read him as much as I could. He didn't give me the time though.

"Of course."

I felt an immense weight lifting from my shoulders and was entirely too relieved at the thought that Nori had forgiven me. I felt a huge smile widen on my face.

I couldn't resist the sudden urge I had to embrace him.

Quickly my arms encircled his waist and I pressed my face between his shoulder blades. I tightened my hold on him as I felt him freeze in my arms. I didn't care. My heart was almost bursting with happiness at the simple fact he had forgiven me and would let me embrace him. After a short while I let my arms fall back to my sides and Nori cleared his throat, twice, before striding quickly to the kitchen.

Happily, I followed him.

I still had this smile when I entered the kitchen and sat at the table near Ori. Nori had indeed escaped to his bedroom but he came back rather quickly. Diner that day was a peaceful and cheery moment.

I was helping Dori to clean the dishes while Ori and Nori were discussing calmly, sitting at the table. The two of them were enjoying one more tankard of ale each when Ori suddenly jumped and startled, well, all of us really.

"We all forgot! We have presents for you!"

At that he rushed back to the corridor leading to our rooms.

"Presents, what for?" I stammered puzzled.

"You don't remember the day you left?" Nori asked softly and it dawned on me what they meant.

"Oh, right!" I smiled broadly when Ori rushed back in with a parchment rolled in his hands.

"Ori, don't tell me you actually got the time to do a map!" I exclaimed joyously.

"Sure I did. But actually I started it when you first left for Gorm and Fili and Kili even helped me, well before they left they helped." He said, unrolling it on the table. "We went back to the corridors where you lost your way. I mapped them too. Actually Thorin thought it wasn't such a bad idea and asked me to map the whole caves."

Ori looked so happy about it I couldn't help but chuckle happily too. Dori was radiating with pride and Nori was leaning on the table, his chin resting on his left hand. He was smirking lightly and I could easily tell he was proud of his little brother too. Now I remembered Ori's little grin and his blush when I had asked him for a map; it made sense, he obviously found it funny to realize I would ask him to do something he had already started doing. And he had blushed because he really didn't know how to lie. It was rather ironic when one knew he was the brother of a thief. To think though that he had the idea before I asked him only proved how well Ori knew me.

"That's amazing Ori."

I looked at the huge parchment and was shocked at how precise the lines and plans were. Ori had separated it in various maps corresponding to the different levels in the Halls. It was easy to understand and I soon brushed my fingers against the ways I already knew.

"You should keep it with you at all time." Nori said evenly. "We wouldn't want you to get lost while your map is safely rolled in your room." He winked at me.

This wink, more than any words, told me I was truly forgiven.

"Ahah. You know, it's an amazing job you did Ori. It probably took you forever to do that."

"It really was no trouble." Ori blushed a bit and I smiled.

I looked at him shift awkwardly on his seat and Dori patted his shoulder, showing how proud he was of his little brother. It was a very sweet sight to behold and it made me happy. Just happy. And then I realized how often I was feeling like this since I had met the three brothers. I could deal with harshness, with pain and hurt. I could deal with it all if I had the brothers with me. My lucky star had definitely been shining bright and high the day I ended up in this weird medieval world and met them.

While I was lost in my thoughts, Dori had taken out another package from its hiding spot on a high shelf and put it in front of me.

"And here is a present from all of us. I asked the best artisans to do it." Dori said putting a small leather pouch in front of me.

I looked at him and he seemed curiously impatient. I took the pouch and opened it. Inside, I could see that there was something made of leather too. I gingerly took it out from the pouch and held it cautiously. It was a small band of dark leather, at each ends there was a leather thread that would allow me to attach it to my wrist. It was simple in design but I liked it until I realized something was engraved on the band.

The symbol was odd, it represented two triangles intertwined together to form a sort of hour glass figure while the triangles' peaks formed a diamond in the middle. In the centre of the figure, there were three stars made of nine branches in a line. I was beginning to see a pattern of threes here. I looked up at Dori and asked him, genuinely curious.

"Is there a meaning in the symbol?"

"Aye, there is. It's our family's crest." Dori answered lowly while Nori was carefully observing me and Ori was unabashedly staring at me, all of them were obviously waiting for my reaction.

"Your…family crest?" I was stunned. Surely there was a meaning behind him offering me that.

"Aye. We'd like you to wear it. Added with your braid, every dwarf around will know your linked with us."

Tears welled in my eyes. It was such a sweet, meaningful gesture. I stood up and embraced Dori who patted my back. I felt so happy to receive such a present. It meant that the three brothers wanted dwarves to know I was one of them. They were acknowledging me as someone important to them, someone under their protection.

I released Dori and hugged Ori before turning to Nori. As soon as my arms encircled his shoulders, I felt Nori tense. I could only guess he was still being silly about that morning's situation. I felt a pang in my heart and sadness at the thought that something like this could create an edge between us. I truly hoped Nori would be able to overcome it because I really didn't want him to grow distant with me.

"Thank you. I didn't know you had a family crest. Does every dwarf have one?"

"No" Ori answered first.

"We have one because our family has long been a merchant's family. Before the fall of Erebor, our father was at the head of the merchants' guild." Dori elaborated.

I was surprised to hear about it. I really hadn't known they came from an apparently powerful family. I guessed that being the head of a guild was quite important in this world. I glanced at Nori, wondering why someone coming from such a line would chose to enter such a line of work.

He probably followed my trail of thoughts because he frowned and glared at me for a few seconds. I simply shrugged and stared back at him. He surprised me though when he sighed and scratched his head, suddenly looking a bit sheepish. He cleared his throat, clearly uneasy and my eyes widened when I saw his cheeks turn slightly pink. He stood up and went to his room, or so I guessed, and came back quickly.

"Here, I made this for you." He said before handing me a small package.

I took it and opened the leather package to discover a beautifully braided leather belt. It was made with several strips of leathers that were braided together masterfully. The bands didn't have the same width and their colours varied from a dark brown to a much lighter one. Together with the intricate braiding it created a beautiful and complex pattern. Then I saw the buckle and realized it was similar to the ones that the three brothers wore on their own belts, the one that I now could see was a simplified version of their family crest.

I turned to face Nori and managed to squeak a few words past the large lump in my throat.

"You did that for me? It's so beautiful…"

I couldn't resist hugging him once more and this time too he tensed, but I truly didn't care. I hugged him tightly and for a long time before freeing him and embracing his two brothers in the same way.

After I finally reigned on my bubbling feelings, I asked Dori to help me attach the bracelet properly, so that it wouldn't fall. I then proceeded to change my simple belt for the one Nori had made. I felt only happiness at that moment and everything else was completely forgotten. Nothing could have dampened my mood.

A bit later that evening Bofur, Bombur and Bifur came to share a tankard of ale after their own diner. Bofur seemed extremely upset about something. This dwarf was among the loudest I knew. He was laughing loudly, talking loudly, whispering loudly. I could have sworn he even thought loudly. That evening though, and now that I thought about it earlier that day too, he was oddly subdued. It didn't take me long to find out that he was feeling awfully guilty about what had happened twice in that bloody men's town. I sighed. Bofur was one of the nicest persons I'd met and one of my closest friends here. It was unsettling to say the least to see him being so downcast.

"Hey, Bofur, don't you want to play something tonight?"

I had asked in as soft a voice as possible and managed to get him to look up at me. His eyes were so sad and regretful, it made my heart ache. If I had any doubts, now I could anymore. Bofur was feeling guilty. I opened my mouth to speak but he was quicker.

"I'm so sorry lass. I really am. I wish I could do something to help you."

His voice was so low it was hard for me to hear him. The others were silent and looked anywhere but at me or Bofur. I stared at the sad dwarf and simply answered.

"Bofur. I hope you do realize that I'm not angry at you, right?"

"Still, it's true what you told Thorin. We should have listened to you the first time, and you did well during that second time. He had no right to talk to you like that. I'm sorry you had to … you know… in order to help us. I'm sorry you're in pain."

"You can't help it if you're dwarves." I said with a small smile. "Bofur, you lot are blunt, stubborn, silly, bloody annoying and noisy. Still, you're also very funny, loyal and honest. If I were to make those choices again, I'll be honest with you, I'll poison that water once more. I'm not angry at anyone for that. And about that…other thing I did. Well, I'd do it a hundred times over if it means the four of us can again come back alive."

"You're hurt." Bofur whispered.

The other dwarves were forgotten. In my mind, strangely, there was only me facing Bofur. I understood he felt bad because I hurt. But I wasn't sure he actually knew what hurt me most. Ever so softly I answered, nodding at the same time.

"I am. The thing is, I would do it again for you all. But it is not something I thought myself ever capable of doing. I…I'm shocked at what I was capable of for you all. And it's not really a meaningless act for me. It's complicated. I just. It's just that quite a lot of things happened in a short time. It's difficult dealing with it all."

Bofur grimaced and I glanced at Nori. He was looking straight at me, his face devoid of emotions but his eyes shining with concealed feelings I couldn't discern clearly.

"Bofur, most of my anger…it was because I was afraid that you all would despise me after what I did. And then, well, killing somebody is a crime where I come from. It's hard for me to realize I didn't hesitate in becoming a criminal." I said so lowly I thought they wouldn't hear me.

"How could we despise you lass? And you're no criminal. Not here." Bofur said, shaking his head from side to side.

"Amelia. You remember when you first arrived here?" Ori interrupted us and I nodded. "Remember those men that Dori, Nori and Gloin killed?" I nodded once more though I shivered at the memory. "You did what any loyal dwarf would have done. You protected the others in any way you could, with the poisoning and the killing. No dwarf would despise you for that. We're just sad it hurt you in the process."

They all nodded solemnly at Ori's words and it made me think about it all once more.

I realized after my little talk with Bofur that everything I said was true. I would do it again. And if I were honest with myself, it scared me. Half my fears were probably coming from that actually. I had just found out I'd be able to go to extreme length for the dwarves. I didn't even hesitate before talking back to their King. I didn't know I had such…anger or violence in me. I didn't know I'd ever be capable of deceit, lies, and potentially murder for anyone's sake; but apparently I was.

It was life shattering to realize that you'd be ready to kill innocents in order to save people close to you.

I wondered how I would have reacted if Ori or Dori had been captured.

I shivered.

I had the awful certainty that had anything befallen on either of them; the villagers would have had more to worry about than mere stomach ache. I was fairly certain I wouldn't have taken any chances and would have put larger quantities of poisons in their water. And the mercenaries? I would have burn the house down and made sure none of them got out…

Then I glanced once more at Nori. He was arching his eyebrow questioningly. Obviously he didn't know what I was thinking about.

The thought of Nori imprisoned by these men…

I was shocked to feel rage course through my veins. And then fear because I knew, I just knew that I'd killed every damn villager in this town if it meant I could save Nori. I wouldn't even have hesitated. I would have found a way, whether it was by fire, poison or the blade of my dagger…all the living souls in that damn town would have been as good as dead the moment they would have taken Nori away from me.

And I wouldn't have regretted it.

If it meant Nori was safe…then there was nothing to regret.

My eyes widened and I clenched my fists tightly.

What was happening to me?

Who was I?

* * *

The following day I woke up with a weird feeling. I had absolutely no idea as to what I could do from now on. I wasn't one to stay idle. Well, my aunt would argue with that; she believed that reading novels equalled to being idle.

In any case, here I had no novels to read, no music to listen to, no computer, nothing really. I really didn't feel like going to the healing wards, I had been entirely truthful about it. I needed a break to think and find out what was going on in my head.

I slowly sat and took my time before standing up. It was so calm around, so peaceful. Still I didn't feel like staying in the house and doing nothing but thinking again and again about the events would change anything for the better. I wanted to take some time off of herbs, blood, medicine and anything even remotely close to this.

I didn't want to have too much free time either. I didn't feel ready to confront my own thoughts and emotions. The things I had realized the previous evening had shattered me. I was past shocked. This new found rage and protectiveness for the dwarves was baffling. I didn't want to ponder on that yet. I wanted to breathe again before actually trying to think about all those depressing and disturbing thoughts.

I put on some clothes and got out of my room, wondering what time it was and why none of the brothers had awakened me. When I pushed the door to the kitchen I was only half surprised to see Bofur, Bifur and Bombur there.

"Dori, do you think we should change the living room into a dormitory?" I heard myself ask.

"Amelia!" Dori greeted me with a smile before frowning. "Why do you say that?"

"Well, they spend so much time here, they might as well move in." I smiled at Bofur who winked at me.

Bombur was eating heartily his breakfast and I caught Nori quickly using the distraction I had involuntarily made to steal sausages from Bofur's and Dori's plate. He winked at me when he saw I had caught him red handed. I couldn't help it, it made me smile.

"Well, actually we're here for a reason today!" Bofur said while trying to poke at his disappeared food.

He looked down at his plate when he heard the clank of the fork against the metallic plate. I smiled some more when I saw him frown.

"Nori…" He groaned but the sneaky thief had already eaten everything, efficiently erasing any proof of his mischief.

"Aye?" The cheeky dwarf managed to look innocent.

Bofur shook his head while Dori, who had finally realized the theft, glared at his brother.

"So, we're here to know what you're going to do today." Bofur continued.

"Well…I'm not sure actually." I took a seat next to Ori, facing Nori.

"You could come and work with Bifur and me."

"I've never…Bofur, it's really nice and I'd love to accept. But I don't know anything about how to do what you guys do."

"We could teach you!" Bofur seemed enthusiastic about the prospect of teaching me until Bombur interrupted.

"You could come and work with me in the kitchen. Help is always welcomed there!"

I glanced around the strangely silent table. Why did they all look so horrified? Except maybe Nori who hid it better, but all the others were staring at Bombur in disbelief.

"Are you. Are you sure it's a good idea?" Dori asked.

"Well yeah, why not?" Bombur shrugged before biting a large piece of bread.

"I know how to cook too. It could be fun." I added, smiling at the ginger dwarf.

"Really Amelia. You are sure it's such a good idea?" Dori insisted.

"Do you have anything against my cooking?" I quirked an eyebrow at him.

At that Dori didn't say anything anymore. I knew of course they were thinking about the only two times where I had somehow forced them to eat odd dishes according to their taste. Still, in the big kitchens with Bombur, I would listen to him, not cook my favourite recipes.

Bombur was smiling happily at me and I mirrored it. The idea of doing something completely different and new was refreshing. I could already feel some weight lifting of my shoulders; my worries slowly being forgotten thanks to the prospect of learning something new. My concern over turning into some sort of monster was in the far back of my mind at the moment. I felt much better not having such thoughts whirling around in my mind.

I chose not to be concerned by the other dwarves' doubts either. After all, I doubted that they were culinary experts.

I was certain it was an amazing idea for me to join Bombur and work in the kitchen.

* * *

I followed Bombur when he left the apartment. The round dwarf was a real nice person, but that wasn't so surprising considering he was Bofur's brother. The both of us made our way towards the main kitchen, and I was happy to find it was marked in the plan Ori had made for me. As I had promised, I kept it on me at all time, and especially when I roamed the corridors. I'm sure the King would appreciate the gesture.

At the moment, Bombur was explaining how dwarves working in the mines and forges would be distributed lunchboxes during their break. It was our job to prepare the food and the boxes and some other dwarves would deliver them.

I listened intently to Bombur until he stopped in front of large doors.

"Here we are." He said while pushing the doors open.

As soon as he did so, a mouth-watering smell started to float in the air around us. Hadn't I just eaten, I swear I would have jumped on the food right then.

"Oh my, what are you cooking?" I couldn't help but ask.

"Today we're preparing honey cakes and roasted pork and beef. We'll boil some potatoes later too."

Bombur, while he answered, walked in and took a large apron that was hanging on a hook. I looked around and discovered a massive kitchen with huge ovens and hearths. Two pigs were currently roasting in two of the four hearths and I could see one dwarf taking a huge plate out of one of the ovens.

"How many dwarves work in the mines and forges?" I asked genuinely curious.

"Around two hundreds." Bombur answered while looking around.

"It's not that much." I said, honestly surprised.

"Aye. There aren't that many of us."

Bombur's face turned sad and I felt bad for putting this expression on his usually cheery face.

"Well. It's still quite a lot of people to cook for!" I exclaimed joyously.

"Sure is!" Bombur laughed loudly then.

During that morning I spent some time peeling potatoes and cutting the meat into smaller pieces so that the dwarves could eat it easily. Bombur was always beside me, talking, joking, explaining and listening to my questions and thoughts.

Soon I wondered why I had never discussed more with him; he was such an easy person to talk to.

While he cooked, he'd taste everything he'd make and forced me to do so too. I had to admit the meat was perfectly done, crunchy on the outside and perfectly roasted while the inside was tender and would melt on one's tongue. And the honey cakes were just delicious, spongy enough and sweet yet not overly so. Oh my, I could have eaten the whole batch had Bombur not kicked me away from it, laughing all the while and helping himself to a second serving.

I used to say that Bofur's laugh was incredible; the dwarf always seemed to laugh with his whole heart. Bombur's laugh was entirely similar if more impressive to witness. He put his two larges hands on his belly and let his head fall back, laughing merrily while his belly would bounce at each laugh.

Bombur seemed to laugh all the time over the simplest things too. Soon he had me brushing away tears from my cheeks for his mood was entirely too contagious.

After one of those laughing fit, I managed to catch my breath before asking Bombur.

"Do you always cook the same things?"

"Aye. More or less. Potatoes, bread or cakes. And meat. Sometimes we do soup and stew too."

"Why don't you ever try any changes?"

Bombur shrugged while he put an enormous pile of empty lunchboxes made of wood in front of us.

"Never really thought about it. The lads need to eat a lot. Those recipes are good for that. It's not banquet food."

"Sure, but for example you could try to do some stuffed meat, or meat with pastry crust." I said while putting in each lunchbox a healthy serving of meat. "Or cook the meat in a different way or with a sauce."

"Pastry crust?" Bombur asked while he added two potatoes in each box.

"Yes. You prepare crust, then for example, you roll your piece of meat in it and you bake the whole together. It's nice. Or you can bake the minced meat in pies." I replied repeating the same task over and over again.

"It does sound nice." Bombur frowned, thinking about my words.

We spent some more time preparing lunchboxes, the other dwarves in the kitchen adding cakes after we put meat and potatoes. To my surprise, all the dwarves around were as curious as Bombur about my ideas and recipes. I was shocked too when Bombur praised my recipe of black pudding with apples. The others looked at me strangely but agreed to try it once.

I smiled hugely at that. Maybe it was just the three brothers and Bofur who had weird tastes? Maybe the other dwarves would enjoy other recipes? I ended up discussing a variety of menus with the cooks and time flew quickly. Soon other dwarves came in, took the lunchboxes away and we were left discussing what to prepare for this evening's dinner.

"So, how do you make those stuffed meat with pastry crusts and meat pies?"

"We'd need something else Bombur." One of the dwarf commented.

"What about this pork roasted with honey?" Another one asked.

I smiled widely at Bombur and the cooks. So far I really enjoyed working with them all.

* * *

Later that evening, I was quite proud of my achievements. With the other dwarves we had prepared minced meat pies and I was quite happy with the results. They had roasted pieces of pork with a sweet sauce made mostly of honey. It smelt delicious.

I had never cooked anything in such huge proportions before and it was challenging, but thankfully, Bombur and the others were used to this. Honestly they did most of the job.

The smell of the freshly baked pies was amazing and it was hard not to have a bite. We had minced pork meat with potatoes, mushrooms, carrots we had to battle to find, and we had put all this mix in huge plates where we had first put the pastry dough. We had then recovered the pies with some more dough and had cooked all of it.

We only kept three pies for us to eat as well as some of the caramelised pork when other dwarves came to gather that evening's meal. They would serve it to the dwarves in the main dining hall. Meanwhile, Bombur divided the pies in huge pieces and gave one to each of us. Another dwarf was serving the pork. The dwarves dived in immediately while I waited for their comments.

"Oh, it's kinda weird." One of them said.

"Sure is, but it's tasty. I like it. The pork especially." The second told us.

"The pie gives a bit of a sweet taste. It's really different."

"And the carrots too."

"I can't decide whether it's salty or sweet." Another added with a deep frown looking at his food.

"It really is completely different, but I like it." Bombur said in a smile.

"I'm glad you do." I answered, smiling back and finally taking a bite of food.

We were all eating peacefully when the huge doors of the kitchen opened to let the King enter. He immediately spotted us and strode in our direction. His face was a blank mask I couldn't read.

"Bombur, what is this?" He asked pointing at the food left untouched still.

"It's minced meat pie and caramelised pork." The round dwarf answered.

I had never seen the King looking quite so tired before. He sighed loudly and rubbed his hands on his face.

"Why did you do that?"

"I gave them the idea." I answered honestly.

The icy blue eyes turned towards me, apparently surprised and annoyed. I saw him frown and silently hoped he wouldn't yell at me for having chosen to work here.

"Miss Amelia. I do understand your will to change your activities." He clearly gritted his teeth. "But would you please try not to threaten the peace of these Halls."

"Eh? What? What do you mean?" I really didn't understand what he was talking about.

"Half of the dwarves in the dining hall are currently yelling that this isn't proper food. Another part is trying to defend the cooks' honours and a last part is mocking the first one, saying they have no taste and that this is actually good. All in all I have currently a colony of dwarves fighting in my halls…over pies and pork."

Oops.

I felt bad for the King, I really did. I could pretty well imagine a group of rowdy dwarves yelling at each other and fighting over the most stupid topics. It couldn't be easy to be the King of such a group of people. Still, the idea that they were fighting over pies and caramelised pork made a small chuckle bubble out of my mouth. I quickly pressed my hand over my lips trying to stop my laugh but the harm had already been done. Hearing me laughing, Bombur started to chuckle too.

When Bombur chuckled, his belly would bounce lightly and quickly and his long moustache braid was bouncing with it. It made me laugh. After that the poor King sighed and let himself almost fall on the bench nearby, dropping his head in one of his hands.

I did offer him a piece of pie and he glared at me before taking the offending object and biting in it. I smiled when I saw first a look of surprise ghost over his features and then a deep frown. But as he always frowned I couldn't know for sure whether that was a good sign or not.

Bombur and the other cooks were silent, as was I, while the King ate slowly. He eyed the piece of pie in his hand before finishing it.

"T'is not bad." He said in his deep voice. "But please, try not to make too much of those. I really don't want to have fights because of food."

We all nodded and I thought he would leave just like that. But he didn't. He looked at me and seemed to ponder on something for a minute before telling me.

"Miss Amelia, maybe you should refrain on giving too many ideas to our cooks and try to find another activity to occupy yourself. One that doesn't put the dwarves on a war path if possible."

"I…" I was honestly shocked by his words. "I'll try to find something else sir."

At that he simply nodded and left. Bombur was kindly patting my shoulder and reassuring me that my recipes were very good and that anyone should be honoured to have the opportunity to fight over them. It was sweet and I thanked him with a smile. But at that moment I only wanted to go back home.

* * *

I held my head low that evening when I went back to the three brothers' apartment. I was feeling pretty discouraged when I opened the door. Immediately I was assailed by noise, though it wasn't the usual one.

"Ow! Be careful lad! That hurts!"

"I'm not a healer." Ori sighed as I entered the room.

Nori and Bofur were sitting on chairs, Bofur holding clean linen against his head while Nori seemed to be holding his arm quite cautiously. Dori was nowhere to be seen until he arrived, a bowl in hand, and a massive bruise already forming around his left eye.

"What happened to you all?"

They all startled and for a second I was rather proud to have surprised them. With their very keen ears, it was rather rare I could.

I looked at the four dwarves who stared right back. Ori was the only one who didn't seem to suffer from any injury. What had happened to the others? It seemed unlikely that they would fight against each other. I stood still at the entrance, frowning, when I finally realized something.

"Did you by any chance go to eat in the main hall tonight?"

At that question they all exchanged glances and looked rather sheepish. I rolled my eyes, seriously how silly could they be? Fighting not for food, but because of disagreement over taste? That was ridiculous.

I sighed and went in my room without uttering a word. There I took my satchel where all my tools were and went back just as silently in the direction of the living room. The dwarves looked downcast. I had no idea why they would, after all dwarves usually enjoyed a nice, friendly fight.

"What did you think of it?" I asked, attempting to break this unbearable silence.

I didn't need to explain that I was talking about the food. These dwarves were smart. They probably had guessed I was behind the recipes. Nori glanced at me and I offered him a smile. I took a seat in front of Bofur and took the bowl of water from Dori's hands. Ori, seeing that I was taking charge of this, just chose to sit nearby and remained silent.

"So? Did you lose your tongues?" I insisted.

"It was…" Dori started.

"Different?" Bofur offered.

"Nice." Nori added in a low voice. "It was nice. I liked it."

"You did?" I looked up abruptly, pleasantly surprised by his words.

My heart seemed to beat a bit harder against my ribcage and my chest seemed to tighten a bit after I heard those words. I didn't even try to analyze these feelings. Nori's words were making me happier than I thought they would and nothing else seemed to mattered.

"Aye. T'was nice." He mumbled, looking at the fire in the hearth.

"It wasn't bad, but hem…maybe not as popular as it should have been?" Dori tried to be diplomatic.

"It was better than the pudding and apple. But lass, you can't do weird stuff like that for the Halls dining room." Bofur bluntly told me.

He received a swift kick in the shin from Nori who glared at him.

"Oy!" Bofur complained and I decided to intervene before another fight started.

"It's alright. I won't work in the kitchens anymore. The…the King asked me to, erm, avoid going back there with such ideas."

I felt myself blush slightly. I was a little bit ashamed that a simple idea of mine had transformed the Halls into fighting rings. I cautiously removed the linen Bofur was holding on his head and cleaned the cut he had above his left eyebrow. It was shallow and didn't require any treatment, though I dabbed a bit of thyme essence on it for good measures. I put a fresh bandage around his head and turned toward Dori.

The older dwarf had mostly bruises and there truly wasn't much to be done. Considering the strength of the dwarves, I knew those bruises wouldn't stay long. Ori was perfectly fine too and was the first one to speak.

"If you miss those dishes, you can try them here."

I froze. Ori had always been the most reluctant of them to try my 'strange food' as he put it. For him to say such a thing just highlighted how much he cared about me. I couldn't resist. I jumped up and hugged him and closed my eyes for a second.

"Thanks Ori. I'm sorry for the troubles I caused."

"T'was nothing lass. Dwarves love a good fight from time to time."

Bofur smiled at me and I ended up hugging him too until I thought about something.

"Oy. On which side were you guys?"

"Side?"

"You heard me Bofur. Were you fighting for my dishes or against them?"

I eyed him critically, suddenly suspicious.

Bofur though reacted in his usual way. He laughed heartily, not saying an actual word. Dori was now sitting on a chair near the fire, looking exhausted, and Ori was dozing in his chair. Nori had retreated in the shadows, standing a bit away from us all and I was sure he would soon try to sneak away. Yet I was certain he had been hurt and there was simply no way I'd let him go without checking him properly. Meanwhile I tried to find out what would annoy Nori so much that he'd rather not be healed.

Bofur was finally calming down and he brushed away a few tears from his eyes before looking at me.

"Lass, it hurts me how suspicious you can be."

"Oh sure, you look like you're agonizing." I deadpanned.

"Don't be like that. Of course we defended your weird culinary ideas." He winked at me before standing up.

He stretched and finally, after saying goodbye to everyone, left to go back to his place. At the door though he turned to me and said with a smirk.

"Tomorrow, if you wish, I'll show you the workshop where Bifur and I work."

"Thanks Bofur. I'll wait for you here then." I agreed, though I wasn't sure I had many choices left.

And with just that, I ended up being with the three brothers. I observed Nori who was slowly making his way towards the door, clearly attempting to retreat in his room and I just couldn't accept that.

"Dori, Ori, you both look really tired. Don't worry, I'll clean up here you can both go to sleep. Nori, come here, I still haven't check your wounds."

"Are you sure you don't need help to clean all this?" Ori asked

"Don't worry, I'll be fine. Go to sleep, you look like you both need it." I brushed his concern off.

Dori was almost at the door when he turned and looked at me for a minute. He smiled softly before speaking.

"Don't feel bad about today Amelia, your dishes aren't bad. They're just unusual and dwarves sometime don't do well with unusual."

I smiled at Dori for his words. I knew he meant it too and I knew he was right. Dwarves were an old, ancient race, from what I had found out. They had traditions and habits and tended to stick to those. Change wasn't that much welcome in their Halls. Yet they had accepted me fairly well so far, so it wasn't even right to say that. They were strange people. That much was sure, but I liked them. I liked it here.

I realized it clearly now.

Even though I had been hurt, felt lost and different, even though I was changing into someone I wasn't sure was a good person, I still liked it. It felt right to live with the dwarves. It felt right to be with them. How many months did it take me to come to such a conclusion? Spring would soon be here. Soon it would be a year since my arrival and I found myself thinking less and less of my world as my home. The world where I had been born was starting to be just that; my birthing place.

It was very strange and it made me uneasy too.

How could anyone forget so easily about the place he had lived most of his life in? I still missed my aunt and uncle. I still suffered from my parents' death and the drama that had followed it. I still thought about them but it felt recently as if something was changing.

I frowned.

Now wasn't the time to think about that. I needed to check on Nori and his odd behaviour would probably not help.

Wordlessly Ori and Dori had left the living room and I had smiled at them both. Nori on the other hand was unmoving. Clearly he hadn't expected me to order him to stay. It was strange to see him being obviously unsure of what to do. I was used to confident, cheeky, smug, teasing Nori.

Once we were both alone, we remained motionless for a while, observing each other from the corner of our eyes.

I could feel a strange tension in the room. Strange I said, because I wasn't used to that kind of atmosphere with Nori. Eyes still locked on him, I moved slowly, sitting on the small table just near the hearth. I pointed at the chair in front of me and didn't say a word. It was fairly obvious what I wanted him to do, no point in voicing it.

It took him longer than I expected to simply come and sit just in front of me.

I kept silent too. I could guess his right arm was injured somehow, as he was cradling it protectively against his chest. Slowly, with movements that reminded me of someone treating a wounded, scared child, I took hold of his right hand. He let me but still avoided to look at me. This man was starting to be impossible to understand.

At that moment I realized how well I was starting to know him. I just knew that if I were to ask him anything right now, I'd merely receive grunts for answers. I didn't even bother then, simply gingerly touching and motioning his hand.

All the while I observed his face and even though he tried to hide it, I could see clearly the slight wince he made when I applied some more pressure on his wrist. I placed his injured hand on my thighs, sensing him tense immediately at that, as I took the time to look in my satchel for a special ointment made of Witch Hazel and Goatweed. Nori was still a perfect impersonation of a statue.

I sighed and gently applied the ointment on his wrist. Clearly something was wrong. I was persuaded he had forgiven me. He had said so, and he even managed to wink and smirk at me. So why would he be so nervous when he was near me? Every time I was touching him, Nori would tense. It didn't make sense.

I quickly finished to bandage tightly his articulation and saw that he was about to leave, just like that, without a word. I couldn't take it. His behaviour was just weird and plain ridiculous. Not waiting for him to stand up, I took his left hand in mine and spoke.

"Nori." I said softly. "If I did anything wrong, of course you'd tell me, right?"

It took him a moment to answer and still, his gaze was avoiding me.

"You did nothing wrong."

"Then, why are you so obviously avoiding me?"

A doubt started to grow in my mind. There were just two things that could annoy him and that I could think of. The first one had been forgiven. As for the second one… No. It couldn't be about the fact that we woke up together. It would be entirely too stupid; it was such an old way of thinking…oh. Right. Middle age era. When would I learn? It seemed that the longer I spent time here, the more I forgot about their bizarre and archaic ways. That was just not normal.

"Nori. Are you still, annoyed, about yesterday…" I stammered a bit, looking for the right words to say.

"It's fine." He interrupted me. "Everything's fine."

I could see a slight blush on his cheeks and hesitated between sighing in annoyance or smile. He was quite cute like this, though I would never say that aloud, he'd rather hear how handsome he was, I'd bet. Oh dear, now I'm blushing too. Time to change my trail of thoughts. I cleared my throat lightly and said.

"Please, I really don't want to lose you over such a silly thing."

"It's not…"

"I know it's not considered silly around here, but it's just the two of us who know about it. So let's." I hesitated for a second. "Let's just completely forget that it happened and move on. Alright?"

Weird, it actually pained me a bit to say that.

"Alright." He relented and I concentrated on him again.

"Sure this time? You're not going to disappear for a month or avoid me for a year?" I teased.

He rolled his eyes and finally looked at me. I was entirely too happy to see his smirk back on his lips.

"I won't avoid you, but I might disappear as you put it, soon."

His voice had lowered at the end of his sentence. I frowned and whispered back to him.

"Nori, you plan on going…thieving again?"

He didn't answer and I observed him for a while. I suddenly remembered our discussion that time when he had been injured.

"Are you even close to finding it?"

It was nothing short of a miracle that he managed to hear me. This time, it was my turn to avoid looking at him. At my words I had seen the hurt flash in his eyes and I could guess easily that this wasn't an easy topic for him. I had no idea what it was exactly that he was looking for, but it had to be something really important for him to go against the opinions of every one he knew.

"Maybe. This time I have good hopes."

I was shocked he even answered my question. My head turned back to face him and I saw him looking down. Following his gaze I realized we were still holding hands. I hadn't paid attention to that until then. I felt a slight blush cover my cheeks once more and had to clear my throat again before speaking.

"Please, at least wait until your wrist is perfectly healed before you leave."

My whispered words made him look straight into my eyes. I could see he was surprised and intrigued.

"You're not going to ask me not to go?"

In all honesty, I didn't want him to go on one of his little thieving trips. But I simply knew that whatever I would say wouldn't stop him. Nori apparently needed to do this. I had no idea what he was looking for, but he had been searching for it for decades. I had no right to stop him in his personal quest. I had no right and it would be wrong to even try.

I didn't answer him, what was the point anyway. I could only make sure he'd leave the Halls healthy enough to face what awaited him outside. I hated it but I had no choice. I had to help him any way I could. And right now, I could only ask him to wait a bit.

"Just wait until you wrist is healed." I simply insisted.

"Alright." He sighed after a while.

"You promise you'll wait?"

"I promise."

I smiled at that. In my mind there was simply no way that Nori, or most of the other dwarves for that matter, would break a promise. They were so hell-bent on being honourable that they wouldn't break a promise made to a friend if they could help it.

"Alright. Then promise me you'd let me check you for injuries when you come back."

"Amelia." He sighed exasperatedly.

"Nori." I mimicked his tone.

He glared at me and I just smirked. Finally he relented. Oh my, I was starting to be good at this, I was apparently able to break into a dwarf's stubborn head and make him actually see sense. I should receive a price for such an achievement.

"Alright. I'll tell you if I'm injured."

"Nuh huh. You'll let me check you. I don't trust you for that. I know you dwarves believe you're indestructible or something equally stupid."

"Alright, alright woman. You're entirely too stubborn for your own good."

"Oh, I've had wonderful teachers and examples in stubbornness."

Finally he smirked at me some more. The playful glint in his grey eyes was back and it warmed my heart to see it. I smiled a toothy grin at him.

"Oy, don't mock the dwarves!" He jokingly growled.

"I'm not mocking them, I'm afraid I'm becoming like one!" I said in a mock desperate tone.

At that Nori's smile widened and he even let himself chuckle lightly while shaking his head from side to side.

"Aye. You are."

I smiled at that, happy to be able to talk with him like this. It felt right and it appeared that the tension from earlier tonight was nothing but a dream. Nori stood up then, forcing me to let his hand go.

"You should go to sleep. Working with Bofur and Bifur might prove difficult."

"It's such a hard work?"

"Nah…Bofur is just terribly annoying and he and Bifur often end up yelling at each other in Khuzdul."

I chuckled at that. It was easy to imagine Bofur making wide hand gesture while Bifur would just huff and groan.

"Go to sleep Mizimul."

I looked up to see Nori was already hidden in the shadows of the kitchen. I smiled sweetly at him and nodded, to let him know I'd soon go to my room. I looked at him disappear in the kitchen and finished to gather my belongings, putting everything back in its rightful place in my satchel.

I was particularly meticulous with my medicinal satchel, I wanted everything to always be at the same place; like this if I were to use it in case of emergency, I wouldn't have to rummage around to find anything.

Not even ten minutes later, I was already in my bed.

While I lay on my back that night, I couldn't help but think about Nori and our discussion. I was glad that in the end he had managed to forget his annoyance about what had happened two nights ago. I was relieved he had forgiven me for breaking our promise too. I was really happy to be able to talk to him, joke and tease him. But I was even happier to see he allowed me to talk about private things with him. I wasn't sure, and I would never ask, but I had a hunch that not so many people around knew why Nori was a thief.

I felt somehow privileged to be able to talk to him about that. I wasn't even sure Dori and Ori knew about this thing Nori was looking for.

My curiosity made me wonder what kind of object could be so precious for someone to spend most of his life as a thief to retrieve it.

I truly hoped, for Nori's sake, that he would find what he was looking for. It hardly seemed fair for him to be looking for it for so long.

A short while later, I finally fell asleep, my mind filled with thoughts of Nori.

* * *

**A/N: Wow! Thanks everyone for all the amazing support! I was really overwhelmed with all the reviews I received for the last chapter :) It was great! Thank you all a lot! Thanks every reader/follower too!**

**Mary: Thanks a lot! I'm glad you liked it :) I really wanted to show that Amelia was now really growing up. As for Nori...I won't say a word ;) but maybe this chapter hinted a bit more as to what he might (or not) be feeling. I hope you liked this chapter too.**

**Kyle: Thanks for the review. :) I'm really happy to see you're enjoying this story! I hope I won't disappoint you.**

**As for this chapter...well I couldn't keep on writing drama, right? So here's a rather light chapter for you. I know I may have made the dwarves overreact with the food but...well, I liked the picture of them all fighting over nothing. I hope you liked to see a tiny bit more of Bombur too.**

**I invented the crest, but I used (or tried to) the form on Nori's belt for inspiration.**

**I hope the rest of the chapter isn't too messy. It's past 1AM here and I'm just so tired that I had trouble to read and think straight...sorry if the chapter isn't so good or if there's even more mistakes than usual.**

**I'm rather busy this week and I couldn't find time to write much these days (which annoyed me a lot!)...I'll try to update the next chapter in 2 or 3 days. I think Wednesday normally.**

**Thanks a lot for your support everyone!**


	26. Stubborn like a Dwarf

**Everything belongs to JRR Tolkien except for the plot and my OC**

* * *

"So, lass, ready for a day's work?"

I chuckled at Bofur's enthusiasm. It was rather early in the morning and he was already behaving rather cheerfully. I was following him in the corridor, going towards the lower levels of Thorin's Halls. He was whistling loudly a merry tune which made me smile as I walked next to him.

"Are we going to the forges?" I asked genuinely curious.

"The forges? Nah. I'm going to show you our workshop. Today we'll work mostly at the carvings. We go to the forges once a week only."

I nodded, slightly surprised. It was somehow odd to think that I had been living here for quite some time now, and I still hadn't seen the forges and mines. I knew now that those two parts of the halls were maybe the most important ones for the dwarves. They were constantly digging deeper and deeper in the mountain, hoping to find some precious stones and metals.

I knew that in their old kingdoms, they mined gold, silver and precious stones. Here though, the soil wasn't so rich and they all lived in fear of seeing the small vein of silver end soon. Dori had told me once that some dwarves were starting to wonder whether they shouldn't simply abandon their houses here and leave for the Iron Hills. It was sad to think they would be ready to leave their home for another kingdom far to the east.

When I had asked Dori what his opinion on this was, he had scoffed and said he would never abandon his king.

I remember smiling then; not because I found it funny or silly. Not at all. I had smiled because I had felt a deep affection for Dori then. He was such an honourable dwarf, so loyal to the King. I had been honestly impressed. Thinking a bit more on it though, I had realized that it was the case for most of the dwarves I knew and spoke to on a daily basis.

"Have you ever been to the forges lass?"

Bofur's voice brought me back to the present and I shook my head.

"No. Never had the occasion really. I heard it's quite impressive though."

"Impressive?" He snorted. "You'll never see anything like it anywhere else! Except maybe in other dwarves' halls." He proudly stated.

"Well, I'll have to work well today then, so that I'll come back the day you go there." I replied jokingly.

"You don't need to work well for that, lass. T'is a shame you've never seen them though. I'll show you some other time." He smiled kindly.

"Thanks Bofur."

We had finally arrived in front of large double doors. Bofur pushed one of them and gestured me to follow him. When I entered I suddenly felt like I was in Santa's toy factory. There were toys everywhere and of many different sorts, though all were in wood or metal.

I let my gaze wander from the dwarf warriors to small wooden swords, to some dwarf maid and wooden horses. It was impressive all the details there were on those.

"Bofur, that's amazing. I didn't see so many of them in the market!" I exclaimed as my eyes were caught by a dragon hanging from the ceiling.

"Aye. We sell most of them in spring and summer when we go to the humans' markets. During winter we mostly build our stock."

"How can you do that?" I asked amazed at the details and precision of the different toys.

Bofur simply laughed and beckoned me to come over. He was standing next to another open door. I followed him in the next room and couldn't stop a gasp. In this part of their workshop, they piled up all the plates, bowls and cups I loved so much. There were quite a lot of them and they reflected the light of the few torches.

"You know, I love those." I said with a smile.

"Aye. They sell well." Bofur nodded, still smiling.

He let me look around freely. My fingers were brushing against the metal and the carvings until I finally turned around to face him.

"So, what am I supposed to do boss?"

"Boss?" He repeated with a frown.

"Aye, that means…hem, leader?"

"Oh…hem right. We'll see how you fare with carving plates. Come, Bifur's probably here already."

I followed him to a third room where we indeed met with Bifur. The dwarf grunted in my direction and I greeted him with a smile. I was already used to his strange behaviour. I quickly looked around and saw a variety of unfinished objects ranging from toys to metallic plates. It looked rather messy but I had this hunch that it was the kind of usual mess that Bofur and Bifur worked in.

I wouldn't try to tidy up the place…that I knew for certain.

"So, have you ever engraved anything before?" Bofur joyously asked me while guiding me to a neat table and chair in the far corner of the room.

"Never."

"Well, there's a start to everything."

* * *

Four hours later my eyes hurt from being so focused for so long on some metallic plate. Still I was quite happy with the result. Of course I wasn't even nearly as good as the dwarves were, but I was quite proud of my little achievement.

During this time I had nearly had two heart attacks when Bofur and Bifur had suddenly started to shout at each other. The first time I was entirely focused on my plate when I had heard a soft grunt and then after a few seconds, Bofur had shouted something in Khuzdul, to which Bifur had replied harshly.

The second time it had been a loud clanking noise that had startled me. Of course it had been followed by the two dwarves yelling at each other. At this point I had turned to observe them. My eyes widened when I saw Bofur pick up a plate randomly before he threw it at his cousin's back. Thankfully Bifur caught it and sent it back with what I believed was a curse in Khuzdul. This little fight had lasted ten good minutes too.

Nori had been right after all. Working with Bofur and Bifur was…special.

Still, in four hours I had managed to engrave a leaf pattern on the outskirt of the plate. Bofur and Bifur had simply showed me how they worked at first and had then shoved in my hands a plate and the tools I'd need to work. Apparently they believed in learning by doing. Well, I didn't complain, and I had made sure anyway that the plate I had been given wasn't too expensive; like this at least I could buy it if I made a mess of it.

But as I said, I was quite proud with my little leafy pattern. For now I had managed to grave on the metal six leaves linked together with curved lines. It was nothing like anything I had seen made around, but it was honestly the only thing I knew how to draw reasonably easily. It reminded me of the holiday's time when my aunt would made me draw on the windows those patterns, obviously using some special pens. Sometimes we would even decorate the mirror in the entrance too. Those were sweet memories.

It explained why I was feeling quite giddy when Bofur came to see me.

"So lass, how did it…"

I looked at him when I heard him stop mid-sentence. He looked surprised, his eyes wide, and I could easily tell that he really wasn't sure what to tell me or how to react at that moment.

"Alright. What is it this time?" I sighed resigned.

"Well, it's not bad for a first try, lass. But that pattern." Bofur smiled, obviously trying to be nice."

"What about it?" I asked.

I really didn't see any problem with a Christmassy leaf pattern.

"Well…it looks entirely too…elvish."

The way he had said that made me think that Bofur was afraid he'd offend me. It took me some time to put two and two together but even then I wasn't entirely sure he was talking about Santa's elves. Surely he didn't mean to tell me that Santa indeed existed here and that he had an army of little creature decorating his toys and his factory and everything for Christmas. It just didn't make sense that such a thing would happen here.

"And it's that bad? That it looks elvish I mean."

"Well, it's really not good. Think meat pies, sugary pork and black pudding with apple all together. That's about how it's going to be perceived."

"You've got to be joking!" I really couldn't believe that.

"Afraid not." He replied calmly.

"Oh seriously? I'm starting to think that whatever those elves are, I'd be better off with them." I groaned disappointed.

The grunt and the string of Khuzdul I heard just then led me to believe that Bifur highly disagreed with me. I couldn't be sure, for I didn't speak a word of the language, but it did sound like quite a lot of swearing.

"My cousin's right. You shouldn't say that lass. It'd break the hearts of the brothers. Anyway, you behave too much like a dwarf to get along with elves." Bofur patted my shoulder kindly.

"Are you telling me I'm noisy and annoying?" I retorted, arching my eyebrow at him.

"Nah, just saying you're a good lass."

I smiled widely at Bofur. In all truth I didn't feel like slaving away in some weird place with little creatures. I felt quite fine here with the dwarves and though they were sometimes particularly annoying, I liked them. It had become my home, for better or for worse. I could now admit it shamelessly. It was coming close to a year since my arrival in this world and it hadn't overall taken me much time to come to see this place as a home.

The weirdest part being that I had the feeling I fitted better here, even with all my oddities, than in the world I had been born in. I didn't know if I would ever go back there, but if I didn't I knew I'd forever be sad for leaving my uncle and aunt behind. Still I had to admit that leaving my friends here and going back was…

It was simply unbearable to think I could leave this place and never see them again.

I just couldn't see my future without Ori to talk to, Dori to advise me or Nori to…be Nori.

At that thought a slight blush crept up my cheeks.

I didn't understand.

Nori was maybe my closest friend here, and if I were honest, he was probably the one I'd miss most if I were to leave. Well it wasn't saying much because I knew I'd miss everyone terribly.

Shaking those thoughts away, I wasn't going anywhere if I could help it, I concentrated some more on Bofur who was analysing my work.

"You got precise hands, but don't you think you could try another pattern? Like those?" He handed me a plate Bifur had just finished.

"I'm not that good at drawing Bofur." I apologized lamely.

"Give it a try lass." He said smiling.

Well, I did. And strangely enough it took me one hour of intense concentration to finally hurt myself with the tool and swear loudly. Bofur laughed loudly when he heard me and I silently cursed him.

"I didn't know you swore like a miner lass. I'll tell Dori, he's in for a surprise."

"Bofur…" I groaned in warning.

The dwarves' intricate design was oddly more complicated than my little leaves. Mostly because with the leaves I just had to do small, little cuts on the metal, whereas the dwarvish pattern needed long lines that crisscrossed in a complicated manner. It required me to put an equal and constant pressure on the tool while drawing the pattern.

I didn't count the amount of time the tool had just ripped on the plate. And now it had just ripped from the plate to the pad of my thumb.

My yelp and shout had obviously alerted the cousins that something not quite right was going on and they soon were around me, looking at my bleeding thumb and the pitiful excuse for a plate I had made.

"Well, I guess it's not really a job for you then…" Bofur simply shrugged, still smirking, and I glared at him.

"You sure?" I asked sweetly, gritting my teeth.

"Unless you want to spend quite a lot of time training first." He simply replied, smiling once more.

I sighed deeply and let my head rest on the table. I didn't want to train for another job, I just wanted to spend some time doing something, anything really, to occupy my mind.

Bofur patted my shoulder.

"Don't worry lass, I'm sure we'll find something for you to do."

Apparently Bofur understood quite well why I didn't want to go back to the healing wards. I was glad for his show of support. Even Bombur had tried to help me even though we mostly saw each other during meal times and he usually was busy eating.

I glanced up when I heard Bifur say something in Khuzdul. I glanced at Bofur who looked at his cousin as if he was really mad.

"Why would you say that?" Bofur said.

I looked at Bifur who shook his head and crossed his arms on his chest. Then he spoke several words and I looked back at Bofur. It was quite strange really to follow a discussion with Bifur speaking Khuzdul and Bofur a language I understood.

"That's ridiculous. It's a bad idea Bifur." Bofur replied.

"What is?" I intervened before Bifur could answer.

"Well Bifur was just giving his opinion on what you could do." Bofur shrugged.

"So?"

"So what?" Bofur asked me.

"Bofur, what's Bifur's idea. I'm intrigued." I explained a bit exasperated, my little cut already forgotten.

"He said you could follow the merchants' caravans."

* * *

"That is out of the question."

I just knew he would say that. There was just no way Dori would agree with me about this and I knew I would have to battle to do it. Still I thought Bifur had a marvellous idea.

"Oh, Dori. Please, it'd be amazing. I could go with you too, like this you'll know I'll be safe. Please. It's the only idea I have." I almost begged at this point.

"Amelia, roads are dangerous and women just don't go with the caravans." He shook his head sternly.

"Dori, we're not going to have that discussion again are we? Please, it'd be great, I'll obey everything you say while on the road. I'll hide my hair and face too. And I'm a good diplomat."

"Amelia, every time you left the Halls, you ended up being hurt. I don't want that to happen again."

That was low. It hadn't been my fault. Still I couldn't be angry at him for worrying about me, could I?

"I know." I winced. "But it'd be different this time. I'd be with you and I trust you more than any other dwarves."

"That's not the point. If we're attacked by a pack of orcs, you'd be defenceless. The same if bandits try to ambush us." He shook his head.

"Then teach me to fight."

"What? No. Just no!"

"What do you want me to do then? Waste away in the caves? Come on Dori, I'm sure I can do it. Teach me not to kill, but just to defend myself. Like this I could follow you. Please Dori, I don't want to stay here all the time. "

Strangely enough, Nori kept silent. I had been certain that he would at some point participate in the discussion, but until now he was sitting in a chair with his pipe on his lips. Ori was there too but his silence was less surprising. Still I had hoped he would help me convince Dori it'd be a good idea to occupy me. I was certain I would greatly enjoy being travelling with Dori, maybe even Nori and Ori.

The major problem with that idea was that Dori was against it. He didn't even seem ready to make any compromises of any kind. At this rate I'd grew old in Thorin's Halls without ever seeing anything except the mountains and that blasted town I had been to. Well there had been that first town as well but any way, they were both close to the mountain.

"You know."

I startled at hearing Nori's voice and turned to him, my hopes high.

"It's not a good idea."

And there went my hopes…

What had I expected? Nori was even more protective of me than Dori was sometimes.

I sighed deeply and looked at the dwarf.

"I don't understand why you're so stubborn about this. Don't you think it'd be a better idea to agree with me and help me prepare for the outside? Do you actually believe I'd stay here all my life without ever asking to go out?"

They didn't answer and Nori averted his eyes, looking back in the hearth frowning. I groaned and strode to the door.

"Where are you going?" Ori asked, surprised to see me leave.

"Don't worry, I got your map." I simply answered without looking behind me.

I started to walk aimlessly, wondering if there would be any dwarf around who would be at least slightly agreeing with me. Most of the dwarves I knew were just like Dori and Nori; over protective and too stubborn for their own good. I knew Bofur didn't agree with this idea, though Bifur would support me.

The problem was that I couldn't really ask Bifur for help with this matter. First we couldn't communicate with one another, second I had the feeling most of the other dwarves thought him a bit crazy. To be honest I wasn't certain he wasn't.

Bombur would probably side with his brother and I couldn't picture Dís or Danà trying to teach me how to fight, though I couldn't be sure. My relation with Dwalin and Gloin were strained since the whole town debacle, even though they had apologized. At any rate we had never been that close any way. Oin would probably not understand what I said, and if he did, I was certain he would tell me it was a bad idea and that I was a healer.

I thought about Balin then, the older dwarf was my second guardian after all and I should probably ask him about such things too. But something told me he would just react like Dori did. The old dwarf was so sweet and nice with me, and he had been so hurt and worried after learning what I had been forced to do. No I couldn't see him agree with me going in the wild again, and much less me learning to fight.

The way I saw it only a particularly cheeky or reckless dwarf would believe it could be a good idea to follow me on this.

Then it struck me.

I knew two extremely cheeky and mischievous dwarves that I could bet were ready to teach me how to fight. They owed me any way and I had no qualms reminding them of that little fact.

I smirked and wondered where I could find them at such a time.

I took the map Ori had made for me and looked at it, as if the names of the dwarves I was looking for would magically appear on it. Well I wasn't that lucky.

As my eyes wandered on the paper, I remember an old discussion I had once with Ori. Smirking I put a finger on the place I wanted to go to.

* * *

It didn't take me long per se to find the forges. It was quite easy really, with the map, the noise and the horrible heat that was generated by the huge furnaces. What did take me some time though was to find the courage to ask a passing dwarf whether he knew where to find the brothers I was looking for.

I had been sufficiently stupid in the past to know that I wouldn't be welcomed if I were to enter the forges' area without a dwarf to guide me. That was, with the mines, possibly the most dangerous area of Thorin's Halls. I knew that.

It took me some time but finally a dwarf spotted me next to the wall and came to ask me what I was doing there. He knew me obviously as the 'human ward' and was all in all quite nice with me.

"Oy lass, what are you doing here?" a gruff voice said, startling me.

"Hem, hi. I just. I'm looking for someone, and I think they might be in there." I pointed to the forges. "But I don't think I should go in by myself." I smiled softly.

The dwarf had a very nice black beard with two large beads separating it in two equal parts.

"Sure you shouldn't go in there alone. It's dangerous." He said with his gravelly voice.

"Would you mind showing me where they are? I would be extra careful."

"Sure you would." He chuckled at that. "I'm Thàlir, at your service milady."

"Amelia, at yours." I bowed my head, used to this kind of greetings now.

"Come then, missy Amelia. Who's this dwarf you're looking for?"

"Well, there's two of them really. Fili and Kili, I've been told they usually work in the forges when they aren't training."

"Sure they are. The lads aren't bad either."

When we entered the area of the forges, after passing through a long corridor and massive doors, I suddenly had difficulties breathing and the heat made me sweat almost immediately. How could the dwarves work in this suffocating atmosphere all day long? It was horrible, I felt like I had stepped in hell. It didn't stop me though and I looked around with wide, amazed eyes.

The furnaces were just massive and I could see dwarves alimenting huge hearths with wood. Further away some of them were manipulating melted and glowing metal with leather gloves for only protection. It was both madness and simply breathtaking.

"How…" I couldn't formulate words.

At that moment I saw huge hammers fall on a dwarf but he didn't dodge. The hammers' booming clank resonated through my very bones. The dwarf was alright to my utter amazement and started working once more on a piece of metal that had been slightly flattened by the hammers.

I felt my jaw go slack. This was incredible. I couldn't believe my eyes.

"That impressed missy?" Thàlir chuckled, waking me from my daze.

"How can you work in there? How can you… it's just so…"

Yep, my brain had just disconnected.

But let's be honest, it was not something I had ever had the possibility to see before. I could see trails and chariots with rocks and metal in them rolling towards the furnaces. I could see enormous hammers that loudly banged and clanked to mould the metal into various shapes. There were hearths as well that were separated from the main furnaces and were used by the smiths when they shaped and forged tools. Close to them I could see basins full of some liquid that would sizzle each time a dwarf would plunge red hot metal into it.

Thàlir remained close to me and at some point even took my arm in his wide, calloused hand. He let me observe around and gave me some time to adjust to the sounds, smells, and atmosphere down here.

Smoke coated the ceiling and the heat was almost unbearable.

After several minutes though Thàlir tugged lightly on my arm and kindly told me.

"Come missy, the lads aren't far. They're working on weapons today."

"Oh…"

I dumbly followed the dwarf while he guided me towards another area and I finally saw the two dwarves I was looking for; they were not far from another group of smiths. Alright, I had to admit it, my eyes widened some more at the sight that greeted me. Most of those dwarves were working with their chests bare, damp with sweat and you could easily see their muscles roll under the efforts they put in throwing the hammers on the metal they were forging. And they really had nicely shaped upper body muscles.

Alright, I had to be objective and honest for a second…

…That was quite a sight.

Thankfully my blush could be attributed to the heat in the forges.

Fili and Kili had just stopped working and were apparently discussing something together and Thàlir called them.

"Oy lads, the missy's looking for ya."

They both looked at me at the same time and when they smiled, it was easy to recognize them as brothers. The two of them, even though they didn't really look alike, had this same toothy grin at the moment. I couldn't help but smile right back at them. My presence though, had been noticed by the other unoccupied smiths and they all gathered around the three of us while Fili and Kili greeted me.

"Amelia! How are you?" Fili asked kindly.

"Meli! I'm glad to see you're alright!" Kili exclaimed joyously.

They didn't give me time to answer them and they were already talking some more.

"I'm sorry for what happened with uncle, I really didn't think back then it would cause you so much trouble." Kili's joy had almost instantly disappeared.

"Are you truly alright after everything that happened?" Fili asked seriously

"I heard you were behind yesterday's food battle too!" Kili then chuckled, once more happily.

"What?"

At his words, the other smiths came closer to us still and I was left standing there, mouth open to answer but not having the time to because Fili and Kili when together just bounced from one topic to another too quickly.

The other dwarves' intervention though gave me some time to finally answer.

"Hey, yes yesterday's dishes were recipes I used to make with my aunt." At that I heard curious whispers around me and I smiled, maybe they weren't entirely disdainful of my dishes.

"It's something as a traditional dish and another rather popular one. I am truly sorry it caused such an issue. No worries though, I'm not working in the kitchen anymore." I said with a small smile, Kili laughed heartily at that.

"Why don't you work in the healing wards anymore?" Thàlir then asked with a deep frown.

"Eh…I'm sorry, what?" I wasn't expecting that.

I was surprised to see Fili and Kili come closer to me in a protective gesture.

"You saved one of my cousins some months ago, Balir. He was going to die and you saved him. Master Oin said he couldn't have done so. Why would you quit being a healer if you're so good?"

At his words I felt a lump in my throat. Still I felt obliged to answer when I saw the dwarves around nod and voice their opinions. All in all, they had heard of my doings in the wards and wanted to know why I wasn't there.

"Well…" I hesitated and they all were suddenly silent, waiting for my answer.

I glimpsed at Kili and he looked torn. Obviously he knew exactly what had happened and what had been said. Fili did too. It would have been stupid of me to believe the contrary. Kili caught my glance and tried to smile encouragingly at me. That alone made me smile. Kili was a nice dwarf, if a bit over enthusiastic and tiring at times. Fili then nodded at me and smiled too and I decided to explain, briefly and vaguely, what had happened.

"I went with Master Balin on some diplomatic mission that didn't go so well. At some point I had to do something that wasn't ethical. And then…on my second mission some other things occurred." Was I making any sense? "I don't regret doing any of it, but it is just hard for me to go back being a healer as if nothing had happened. So right now I'm trying to do other things to keep my mind occupied while I sort my thoughts out."

I took a deep breath as I stopped talking. I really wasn't sure what I said was understandable or logical. I hadn't been ready to speak about it and certainly didn't expect this to happen.

The dwarves started to mumble and grumble between them at that moment and I could tell they weren't convinced by my little speech. From what I could hear, they weren't too happy to hear that one of their few healers, one that had spectacularly saved one of them, to their opinion, wasn't back in the wards.

Fili put his hand on my shoulder then and turned to face the grumbling dwarves.

"Lady Amelia first saved many of our kin during her very first mission. She had to perform acts she thought to be dishonourable to help them. And then, during her second mission, she had to kill someone, a man, for the first time in order to save me even though she set her life to healing people." He declared.

"Fili!" I exclaimed, shocked he would say that so casually. I was a bit skittish about it all.

I didn't like the fact that he would present the events in such a way; it wasn't as if I had consciously decided to save him. It wasn't a heroic act either. It was a bloody murder and it was a crime. It was morally inacceptable, for me at least, and I didn't appreciate that he would talk about it so casually. At that though, all the dwarves around had turned silent. They seemed to observe me in a different way now. My eyes widened when they simply nodded gravely and turned away. Some of them though decided to let me know their thoughts.

"We hope you'll soon be fine milady."

"You're a good lass."

Thàlir was the last one to remain with me and the two brothers.

"I didn't know 'bout that missy. I'm sorry to hear you were forced into danger. Don't worry, if we have to, we'll eat more of those weird cakes and meat if it helps you going back to the wards."

At that he nodded at me and turned back to leave the forges. I was flabbergasted. I looked at his retreating back with my mouth slightly open and entirely too surprised to realize that Kili was chuckling lightly about it all.

"Are you alright Amelia?" Fili asked, squeezing my shoulder lightly.

"I…huh…" I shook my head to gather my thoughts. "Fili, why did you say all that aloud? Why did you put it like that?"

"Amelia, you know how dwarves care for their women folks. I basically just told them that you hurt yourself in order to save one of their princes. Besides, they will acknowledge that being forced to kill someone is something grave for you. They'll respect you for your strength and loyalty." He explained with a small smile.

"You just got more popular Meli!" Kili joked.

"I don't want to be popular." I glared at him, which made him smile more and added. "Especially not if it's because of something like this."

"Anyway. What are you doing here?" Fili said, obviously trying to change the topic of this discussion. "Surely you're not hoping to work in the forges?" The young dwarf looked slightly scared that I would actually have hoped that.

"No." I immediately saw his relief. "I worked a bit with Bofur and Bifur today and Bifur gave me an idea. I wanted to ask you both if you'd agree to teach me how to defend myself?"

I looked at the both of them, studying their reactions and silently hoping they would agree. They were in all honesty my best shot. If those two didn't agree then I wasn't sure any other dwarf would.

Kili's eyes had widened visibly and he had this look of genuine surprise on his face with his eyebrows raised almost to his hairline. Fili on the other hand was frowning and had crossed his arms on his chest. I had to force my eyes away from the sight. Seriously, couldn't they put on some shirts? Still the blond dwarf seemed to seriously ponder my question and I was glad for that.

"Why do you want to defend yourself? You're safe here."

"Of course I know I'm safe here." I rolled my eyes at Fili's question. "I'd like to follow Dori when he goes with the merchants' caravans, but he won't accept because it'd be too dangerous. And when I asked him to teach me defence techniques, he said I didn't need it."

"Well, I can understand his point of view." Fili said flatly.

"Sure. But can't you see mine too? Fili, I don't want to live my life prisoner under that mountain. I love it here, but I need to move from time to time. And I want to be able to defend myself. I don't want to be weak or helpless. Please, can't you understand I just want to be stronger?"

"I do understand that." Kili finally joined the discussion and earned a frown from his brother.

"Don't misunderstand me, I don't want to learn to fight, just some techniques that would allow me to survive were I to find myself in a battle of some kind."

He didn't look convinced. I could see that in his deepening frown. I then thought about a trump card I might have against him. I lowered my head and let my shoulder slump slightly.

"Remember when we went to that town with Bofur? I felt so useless then. It was pure luck I killed that man before he killed you. What if a similar situation happens and I don't know how to react? I couldn't live with myself if someone were to die because of me."

I had said that in a very low voice and I glimpsed slightly up to see a wide smirk on Kili's lips. He looked rather pleased. Then I glanced towards Fili and I saw a little smirk at the corner of his mouth too.

"You little..." He started before he shook his head, still I could hear the laugh in his voice. "In two sentences you remind me I owe you and that it could really be useful for everyone that you learn some basic stuff. You're damn good."

I straightened and shrugged with a little smile on my lips now.

"So, does that mean you'll help?"

"Aye, we'll help you alright. When can we meet to start our lessons?" Fili said with a smile.

"Hem, when you want, but I'd rather Dori and Nori didn't know. Not yet at least."

"Yeah, that'd be better for you." Fili nodded.

"We could meet later tonight then." Kili suggested and we all agreed to meet after supper.

Kili grabbed his tunic and finally put it on before he escorted me back to the entrance of the forges and we parted with him joking about me not getting lost. He and Fili had been happy to see me use Ori's map, as they had helped him draw it, and they had pointed to me where to meet them that evening.

Later that evening I wondered how I could sneak out with the three dwarves lounging in the living room. I hadn't talk much to them that night. I believed they thought I was upset with them. It was at least partly right. I was a bit upset with their immediate refusal of my idea. But it wasn't only that. Actually I kept silent mostly because I really didn't want the brothers to know about my projects and I didn't trust myself to keep it from them.

Still as time passed I realized I would have to leave soon if I wanted to be able to meet with Fili and Kili. At some point I simply decided to stand up and I walked to the door. I felt their gazes follow me and as I opened the door, Ori spoke.

"Where are you going?"

"I just want to go for a walk. Don't worry, I have your map and I won't leave the Halls."

I didn't give them time to answer and scurried away, jogging to the point that Kili had indicated on the map.

"Ah! There you are!" I heard Kili exclaim.

"Hey, sorry if I'm late."

"T'is fine Amelia. Come, let's go to the training ground. There shouldn't be anyone there at that time."

I smiled at the two brothers as they guided me to large double doors that opened on an armoury. I looked at the impressive display of axes, spears, knives, daggers, swords, hammers and other weapons I didn't know the names of. I had been so busy looking around that I hadn't seen the brothers crossing the room to another set of doors.

"Come Meli, we're not going to use weapons tonight." Kili called me.

"What's the plan then?" I asked genuinely curious.

In the meantime we had entered a very large room with benches along the walls. Except for those benches, the room was completely bare.

"Well, first we have to agree on what you want to learn." Fili said, always more serious than his brother.

"As I said, I don't want to know any fancy stuff. I just want to be able to defend myself."

"What do you know already?" Kili asked me.

"Nothing."

They stared at me for a while before looking at each other. They seemed to hesitate now and I really couldn't let them give up before we even started.

"Oh, guys, please. You said you'll help me. Don't make me remind you why you accepted."

Fili smirked and Kili smiled at that and then the youngest one simply crouched before sitting on the floor still smiling.

"So?" I asked.

"We'll help but you have to trust us and do as we say."

"As long as it isn't stupid I'm alright with that rule."

"Fine." Fili nodded his smirk still in place.

"So, with what do we start?"

"Run."

* * *

And run I did.

It had been two weeks now and every evening I'd leave the three brothers to meet with Fili and Kili. I was exhausted every time I came back and slept like a log every night. At least I had the time to relax during the day as the only job Bofur and Bifur gave me was to paint some of their toys.

My training until now mostly consisted in me running circles in the training room while Fili and Kili discussed together, sometimes they sparred against each other too and for two nights now they had started to show me basic evasive movements. Those were rather simple, still as Fili put it, they could very well save my life if I had the reflex to use them.

Thus for two nights in a row I had run, because my first reaction should be to run Kili had said, and then they had showed me how to duck and jump to evade some attacks.

It was all rather fun, despite my muscles screaming in protest for being put to use after 25 years of holidays.

According to the two brothers, running would help me gain endurance, which I needed badly. As it all made sense I didn't complain and simply ran. Though if I were honest, I wasn't lasting long…at all.

That evening when I came back after having taken a quick cold bath to wash away the sweat, I expected to find the living room empty, just like I had the previous nights. I came in gingerly, trying not to make noise, happy to be finally close to my bed. I really wanted to go to sleep right now. I didn't bother to try and light a candle. I knew the setting of the room and knew I shouldn't find any obstacles, and the slight light of the embers in the hearth was enough to let me see shapes.

That was entirely not surprising in such conditions that I couldn't help but squeak when Nori popped out of nowhere in front of me.

"Are you mad?!" I whispered angrily at him. "You almost gave me a heart attack!"

At first Nori didn't say a word, he kept staring at me intensely and he took a step to get closer to me. I felt myself blush, which was weird because I had no reason to blush. It was Nori for god's sake. I was used to be in his arms. Strangely enough the thought of being held by him worsened my blush. What was going on with me?

I didn't have time to question my body's reactions further because Nori finally decided to speak.

"Where are you going every night?" he whispered, his voice strangely toneless.

"I told you, I'm walking around." I mumbled.

"Amelia…"

"I am doing nothing that you should be concerned about Nori!" I whispered, looking up at him and meeting his grey eyes.

I realized at that moment that we were really pretty close, and that he was really upset about something. He was good at hiding his feelings and his face was blank, but I had become quite good myself at discerning what he hid. I wouldn't say I could see it every time, but that evening it was obvious that something disturbed him greatly. Hurt him even.

"Mizimul, are you…" He seemed to hesitate which was entirely odd for him. "Are you seeing…meeting someone?" His voice had become quite soft.

"I…I…" I didn't know why but I couldn't answer.

Somehow I couldn't lie to him, not to Nori, and I couldn't tell him I wasn't meeting anyone. But something told me that there was another meaning at his question. I kept observing him and I saw a flash of hurt in his eyes as he averted them to look at nothing really, just anywhere except me.

As I observed him in silence I tried to repeat his words in my mind. I frowned and finally asked.

"Are you asking me if I'm meeting a suitor?"

I saw him tense but he didn't answer.

"I am not meeting anyone with that in mind Nori." I whispered and I saw him frown some more.

"It isn't proper for you to be out at such time, meeting dwarves and coming back so late." He grumbled.

"Oy, don't talk to me about what's proper or not, cheeky thief." I said jokingly and regretted my word when he tensed some more.

"Mizimul…"

"Nori, I swear I'm not doing anything dangerous or reprehensible. Really I'm not. Trust me, please?"

Nori remained silent for awhile and in the end he briskly turned away from me and went back to his room. He left me alone in the dark and I felt my heart clench. As cliché as it sounded, I felt as if someone had just stabbed me in the chest. I didn't understand those reactions. Still they were most annoying and unwelcomed.

I slowly, sadly made my way to my room, thinking about Nori and wondering what was upsetting him so.

* * *

During the evenings, Fili and Kili mostly made me run to the point of exhaustion and then only they would start showing me some hand to hand combat technique. It truly felt like they were beating me for fun sometimes, but in all honesty I knew they were going easy on me, extremely easy. So it was nothing new when that evening, Fili and Kili decided to try a little spar against me after I had run what felt like hundreds of laps around the training ground. I was already tired and a part of me wanted nothing but to go to my bed, but the other bigger and highly motivated part of my brain was actually enjoying this.

I was facing Kili at the moment. We were circling each other and I really didn't like the little smirk on his face. Until now I mostly knew how to dodge attacks and how to convert one opponent's force against him, for example pushing him so his momentum would make him fall. I felt that Kili was about to attack when I saw something I didn't expect from the corner of my eyes.

Completely frozen, I didn't react at all when Kili decided to send a kick in my stomach. Had I been alert, I would have evaded this easily. Distracted as I was though, I took the hit in the stomach with a yelp and felt all the air leave my lungs. I ended up on my back, coughing and gasping while I looked straight at the subject of my distraction.

"Mahal, you're more stubborn than a dwarf."

* * *

**A/N: Hi everyone! Thanks for reading and reviewing! It's always amazing to receive a little comment :) I'm really glad you enjoyed the last chapter and I hope you liked this one too.**

**So as always, Thanks to the amazing readers/reviewers/followers! Without you all, this story would be in my mind only. ;)**

**As you can see I'm offering Amelia some peaceful chapters. But I wanted to show a bit more of the halls, i'm not sure i did a good job with the forges though. I didn't want to go into a long and complicated description.**

**I know this chapter is shorter than the previous one, but you understand why i cut it here. ;) **

**I should be able to post the next one saturday.**


	27. A Training Day to Remember

**Everything belongs to JRR Tolkien, except for my OC and the plot.**

* * *

That kick in the stomach had hurt. Really. Sure I wasn't really used to being kicked, but still. I was fighting hard to get any air back in my lungs while trying to forget about the dull pain where Kili had hit me. At any rate right now the fact that I was coughing loudly and gasping for air were just mere details compared to the really important matter.

My teary eyes stared at him while he made his way towards me.

In a few quick strides, Nori had come to the centre of the room and was now kneeling next to me, frowning deeply. I saw him glare at Kili and I managed to think straight enough to grab his forearm and stop the harsh comments he was about to snarl. His eyes immediately turned back to me. His anger was still brewing behind the grey orbs, but it was easy to see he was mostly concerned. He helped me sit back without saying anything.

His silence was rather unnerving. Especially as I could see in his tense shoulders and deep frown, that he wanted nothing else than to loudly complain. Fili had come closer too and he was standing near Kili. The poor dwarf looked quite upset and I didn't know whether it was because he had hit me rather strongly or because of Nori's fierce glare.

"I'm sorry Meli, I really thought you'd dodge it." Kili said pitifully.

"I'm…fine." I said between two gulps of air. "I was just surprised."

"What's the meaning of this?" Nori groaned.

"Well…" Fili seemed to hesitate, looking uncertainly at Nori. "Amelia asked us to help her learn some self-defence."

"And I could see how efficient those lessons were." Nori growled.

Fili and Kili both seemed to shrink on the spot. During a second I couldn't help but be impressed at the effects an angry Nori could have on them both. Honestly I believed Nori was rather scary when he was angry. But right now I didn't want him to scare away the only dwarves who had agreed to teach me defence. I wanted to learn those things. I needed those lessons and I found it somehow oddly enjoyable.

Nori meanwhile was still glaring at Fili and Kili. I rolled my eyes and slapped him on the forearm. His eyes immediately came back to observe my face and I attempted to smile, albeit quite sheepishly.

"I'll let you know I was doing quite well until you showed up." I managed to say.

"That's true!" Kili piped in.

"And I'm glad they accepted to help me."

"Amelia, we talked about this already." Nori sighed, shaking his head.

"No we didn't. Not really. You guys decided I shouldn't learn anything. I don't agree with you and I don't mean to offend you but I'm sure the women around aren't as defenceless as you make them seem. Maybe I should ask Dís and Danà then?" I stubbornly stared at him, one eyebrow arched.

"It's different, they had no other choices. You don't need to learn that. You're safe here." He sighed.

"But I want to! I need to! Please Nori…"

I looked at his grey eyes while I tried to plead my case. I really couldn't believe that Nori wouldn't understand me. After all he was a thief and had become one because he wanted, needed to find something. It was similar to my situation in my mind. I didn't ask to be taught for fun, it was entirely logical for me that I should at least be knowledgeable about basic defence tactics.

I had witnessed the harsh reality of this world. I had done and seen things I would rather forget at the moment. I felt like I couldn't honestly remain a healer. Not after having killing someone and poisoned others. But those were only feelings. Those feelings were linked to an ideal and sets of moral rules that came from my previous world. My mind on the other hand was telling me that I was being stupid. If I analyzed my acts with logic and considered the world I was in, it was easy to understand that I shouldn't be upset at all. My inability to reconcile my mind and my feelings was rather annoying though.

I needed to clear those thoughts away. I wanted to forget about all this for awhile. And that was another reason why I didn't want to work in the healing wards for now. If I were to stay there, I would be daily reminded of this internal fight. I didn't want that. Learning self-defence, going out with Dori, those were things I could do that would help me move forward. While I fought against Kili I didn't think about anything else except the fight. When I ran, I let my mind wander. And I knew that if I were to go out with Dori, first I would be as safe as possible, and second I would be able to think about other things too.

I could still remember how my uncle always insisted that fresh air was always good for the troubled mind. It had then become a habit of his to force me out of my room when I was a child and was upset. He would oblige me to follow him in the garden or even sometimes in the park, and we would just walk or garden. He wouldn't necessarily talk. He wasn't a man of many words. But his calming presence and maybe the fresh air too, always seemed to appease my troubled mind. And anyway my aunt would prepare homemade hot chocolate for when we would come back and that was something anyone should enjoy once in awhile.

Shaking those memories away, I concentrated some more on the situation at hand. Nori was still frowning deeply and I saw he was about to speak. I didn't give him any time to do so.

"Nori, I really think it'd be better for all of us." I whispered. "I'm not going to run into danger, but at least if some comes my way, I'd be better prepared. Don't you think it'd be safer for me if at least I know how to evade attacks and kick back enough to play for time or even escape?"

I kept looking straight in his eyes and it allowed me to see the concern and worries, as well as the doubt that my words started to instil in him. His brows were furrowed and I knew he was thinking about my words. At that moment Fili cleared his throat behind me and decided to participate in the short debate.

"Maybe we could show you what we taught her so far."

"Yes!" Kili added. "We didn't do much, but still she's already showing some progress."

"After what I saw already, I'm not sure it will convince me lads." Nori groaned and I decided to intervene.

"I told you, you distracted me. You weren't supposed to be there. Please, let me show you. They're teaching me exactly what I want to learn. Like this you can see and give your opinion."

I observed Nori who was obviously battling against himself. It was clear that he really didn't want me to fight, even in a spar. He looked at the three of us and I was glad to see he was really thinking about it. It made me happy to see him actually ponder on this and not simply refusing to discuss. It showed me how much he cared; he was respecting the promise he had made so long ago. He trusted me, even though it went against his instincts to even think about letting me fight.

Somehow it warmed my heart to see him honestly pondering on this.

"Alright." He mumbled. "Show me what you did so far."

I resisted the impulse to squeak happily and hug him when I heard those words, I settled to smile broadly at Nori who simply stood up and went a few steps back. His face was set in a deep frown as he leant on the wall. His arms were crossed on his chest and his eyes were observing us.

"Alright, well." Kili started, rubbing his hands. "What should we show him first?

"Maybe we could start by the simple moves we taught you, how to avoid punches and block attacks." Fili answered his brother while looking at me with a quirked eyebrow.

"Sure." I said feeling lump in my throat.

It was somehow different to do this with Nori being there to observe it.

"Remember what we told you. Use your elbows. Deflect the blows and keep moving at all time." Fili advised me quickly.

"I'll spar with you, alright?"

I simply nodded at Kili and rubbed my sweaty palms on my thighs. I was growing nervous at the idea that Nori was going to observe and analyze my every move. I had to show him we weren't doing anything overly dangerous and that it would be useful for me to know such techniques. It was a piece of cake, right? I just had to spar like I had done several times already. Nori would easily see how useful those lessons were. He would realize that I wasn't going to be hurt that much and that he didn't need to stop me.

As I looked at the floor I felt as if a huge stone had fallen on my stomach. It suddenly felt impossible to demonstrate all that to an overprotective and stubborn dwarf.

I glanced at Kili who simply smiled encouragingly at me. Nodding at him I let him know I was as ready as could be. Fili had walked to Nori and was now standing next to him. He offered me a smile and gestured for us to start.

"Alright"

I muttered under my breath and observed Kili who slowly made his way towards me. He was circling me and I repeated in my head the advices and tips that the brothers had given me. I kept my eyes firmly on Kili, mirroring his moves, trying to always face him. My knees were slightly bent and I was ready to jump in any direction if the need arose.

After a short lull in our movements, Kili jumped towards me, his right arm raised to strike at my face. Adrenaline started to pump in my veins and I jumped quickly back, raising both my hands in order to defend myself. When Kili followed me and tried to punch me with his left hand, I deflected his blow with my elbow, wincing at the pain that shot up my arm.

It didn't stop either of us though and as he was already readying himself to attack me once more. I quickly crouched enough to side jump under his arm and quickly evaded him by running a few steps away. Obviously Kili wasn't really fighting me. We both knew I had no chance to stand up against him for more than a few seconds. But right now the point was to train me and allow me to learn a few tricks and techniques that might help me win some time. So that was exactly what I did, escaping his blows, running away, jumping on the sides and away from him.

I didn't pay any attention to Fili and Nori. My mind was entirely focused on Kili and his arms. At some point though, when we were close enough to one another, Kili called to me.

"I'm going to use the legs too. Alright?"

I simply nodded, bracing myself for what was to come. Fili and Kili had only started to show me how to evade kicks that very evening. And quite obviously I wasn't too good at it. Still I was glad he had alerted me in this change of rules. I knew it wouldn't happen in a real fight, not even in a real spar, but we weren't aiming for that.

The first kick he threw my way, I managed to jump away. But as he kept on alternating between kicks and punches, I was quickly overwhelmed and in a mere minute I was lying on my back on the floor, wincing. I did wonder for a second how I had ended there. My mind seemed to have trouble remembering whether this last blow was a kick or a punch. It didn't really matter but still, it was unsettling to realize I couldn't quite remember the exact events that had lead me to lie on my back on the floor.

I would probably be covered in bruises by the morning but I didn't mind. If it was what it took to learn and not be utterly defenceless anymore, then I truly didn't care about the colour of my skin or the soreness of my muscles.

Dear lord, was I really sounding as stubborn as a dwarf right now?

These men were really rubbing on me and I probably should be a tad scared about the potential result it would have.

At the moment though, I was more interested in Nori's opinion of our little lesson. Fili and Nori quickly came towards me while Kili helped me stand again, pulling me back on my feet. I winced once more and gingerly moved my arms and shoulders. Nothing seemed broken or torn. That was good news. It didn't mean I wasn't hurting all over though.

"You alright?" Kili asked me.

"Yeah, I'm fine. Don't worry." I replied, tense while I waited to hear Nori's decision.

Fili smiled at me and winked, putting his thumb up to show me I didn't do too badly during our little show. Nori was frowning and didn't say a word. He observed me and I felt unnerved by the seriousness on his face.

"Are you hurt?" He asked gruffly.

"Nori I…" I couldn't finish because he interrupted me.

"Are you hurt? Yes or no."

I sighed and looked straight at him before answering honestly.

"Yes. It does hurt to fall repeatedly on the floor or to receive blows in your arms and legs. But I feel fine, I'm just…sore."

I told him the truth, and was now feeling utterly defeated. I was convinced that he wouldn't let me continue with my training. I saw him nod, a deep frown still marring his features.

"You're too slow. Too small as well. You have no muscles whatsoever. You can't fight. Not like this."

I felt my shoulders slump and my heart fell in the pit of my stomach. I was really disappointed. I had failed in showing him what I could do. Worse still, he thought I wasn't even able to train. This was really disheartening. From the corner of my eyes I saw Fili and Kili were about to protest and defend me, but it didn't lift my mood. Nori didn't even let them speak.

"You can't train as a warrior. You should emphasize on endurance, speed. Better dodge than deflect."

I glanced up at that. Nori was still frowning and he wasn't looking at me. I caught a glimpse of Fili and Kili and they seemed suddenly less tensed. Looking back at Nori I arched an eyebrow and waited for him to finally give his opinion.

After several minutes of silence he sighed and I had to fight against myself to avoid jumping everywhere. I wanted to usher him a bit, I hated how he played with my nerves, though I doubted he did it voluntarily or consciously.

"Fine." He said somewhat reluctantly. "You might be right. But you'll have to be properly trained then, with real masters."

"Oy." Kili complained.

"And it won't be a few hours every evening either. If you're going to train, it's every day in the mornings and afternoons. We'll come and talk with Gloin tomorrow."

"So you'll help me convince Dori?" I asked undeniably happy.

"I can't say he'll agree about your idea of following him, but we might convince him that basic training could do you good."

"Oh thanks Nori, you're amazing!" I exclaimed.

My body acted on its own then and I realized what I had done only when it was too late. In my joy I had launched myself into Nori's arms, snaking my arms around his shoulder and hugging him tightly. My heart skipped a beat when I felt his arms encircle my waist loosely and I couldn't help but smile widely. I felt an immense joy blossom in my heart as my arms tightened their hold on him.

The moment had to be broken by the other two though and Kili cleared his throat loudly before asking me.

"Why didn't we get hugs when we accepted to help you?" He teased.

I disentangled myself from Nori and faced the dark haired dwarf who had a smug smirk on his face.

"Because I actually had to coerce you into doing it and besides you were both horribly sweaty at the time."

"Coerce them?" Nori asked making Fili smirk.

"She reminded me she saved my life…quite sneakily too."

I blushed, slightly uneasy about that little stunt. It wasn't really honest and definitely not honourable. Nori surprised me though by chuckling lightly and shaking his head in disbelief. He soon recovered though and he furrowed his brow rather suddenly.

"And what about that sweaty part?"

"Well she came to meet us in the forges…" Kili started before Nori interrupted him.

"What? You went to the forges alone?" His gaze turned to me once more, reprimanding.

"No, I didn't. I asked a dwarf to guide me in. I'm not stupid." I scoffed.

He narrowed his eyes at me and I glared right back at him. After a short while though he looked at the other two and simply asked them if they could meet with us in the morning so that they'd explain to Gloin what we'd done so far and what they'd thought of my aptitudes.

After those short words were exchanged we all went back our separate ways. As we started to make our way towards our home, I frowned a bit and turned toward Nori.

"By the way…why did you come here tonight?"

He didn't look at me and scratched his neck a bit. He clearly didn't want to answer that. I frowned some more and tried to find a logical reason that would explain such a coincidence. When I couldn't find any I had to admit one thing. It might not have been a coincidence. I stopped dead in my tracks then.

After a few steps Nori turned to face me, a questioning look on his face.

I crossed my arms and stared at him, slightly annoyed.

"Nori, how come you were here tonight at the exact same time as us?"

"Amelia…"

"Did you follow me?" I asked, not listening to him.

His silence was enough. He averted his eyes and I sighed deeply. It hurt. Not much but it hurt.

"Don't you trust me at all?" I murmured.

His eyes immediately found mine and he stepped forward before placing a hand on my shoulder.

"I trust you Mizimul. I just…" He seemed to hesitate and I was about to push him away when he talked. "I can't help it. I was worried. I had to make sure you were alright."

It halted my moves completely. Then I slowly raised a hand to place it on top of his, on my shoulder.

"You won't always be able to be here Nori." I whispered.

He took several long seconds, maybe even a minute before he answered. He was looking at me, a mix of hurt and concern in his eyes. My chest seemed suddenly a bit too tight and I had some trouble breathing but I didn't care much. I was completely focused on Nori. My personal problems were put aside for the moment. Finally he squeezed my shoulder slightly and spoke.

"And that's why I agreed with you about training lessons."

I smiled softly.

I wasn't offended at all about him following me. Sure it was odd, but well, Nori was a thief after all. Those kind of sneaky ways were somehow expected of him. And beside how could I be angry at him when he wanted to protect me? I nodded a bit and he slowly let go of my shoulder. It took me a few seconds to realize my hand hadn't left his and I reluctantly let go. Then he turned back and started to walk. Quickly I followed him.

Nori and I walked silently for a short while and after several minutes I asked him in a whisper.

"How's your wrist?"

"Much better." He answered simply.

"So you're leaving soon then."

It hadn't been a question since I already knew the answer. Nori didn't reply and kept his gaze on the floor, frowning slightly. I didn't know what was bothering him and I wouldn't ask. I knew he wouldn't answer me any way; Nori usually found a way to distract me and almost never answered my questions, or at least the personal ones.

"I'll wait for a few days. I'll stay to see how your training starts." He mumbled after some minutes had passed.

I simply nodded and smiled widely at him, my smile grew some more when I saw the familiar happy glint in his grey eyes.

"Thank you Nori. It means a lot that you're agreeing with me on this." I said and was rewarded by a small smirk.

"It doesn't mean I agree with you following Dori though."

"You could come too, you know." I simply shrugged.

He didn't answer to that and we had arrived in front of our home's door. We entered gingerly and I realized then how much Nori was actually used to this. Being sneaky actually seemed entirely natural to him. Damn thief, I smiled at the thought. Dori and Ori were probably already asleep and the apartment was completely dark, save for the embers in the hearth, like always. Before he had stepped too far away from me I grabbed Nori's arm and squeezed it lightly.

"Thanks Nori. I'm really happy about how things turned out."

I didn't say more and I hoped Nori would understand what I meant by that. I was glad I had met them that fateful day. I was glad they had brought me here. I was glad for everything they did and had done. I was glad to be here.

To my surprise one of Nori's hand slid against my cheek and Nori leant slightly. My heart skipped several beats when I realized what was happening. My eyes fluttered close as I felt Nori kindly kiss my brow. His lips lingered slightly on my now tingling skin before he stepped back and whispered.

"Sleep well, Mizimul."

After those three little words, he left the room, disappearing, melting into the shadows.

Suffice is to say that my dreams that night were filled with Nori.

* * *

The following morning I was greeted by the melodious voices of Dori and Nori arguing about me. I sighed and quickly took a seat next to Ori while Nori was trying to explain to his brother why my idea wasn't actually that bad. Obviously Dori wasn't convinced and their discussion started all over again.

"Hey" I whispered to Ori who was eating calmly while listening to his brothers." For how long have they been arguing like that?" I asked while taking a large piece of bread and some cheese.

"I'd say around one hour at least. They had already started when I came in." Ori shrugged.

"Oh…so I guess we won't actually go for another hour?"

"At least."

To say that I was getting used to dwarvish disputes would put it mildly. Dwarves were extremely short tempered and any disagreement would quickly turn into a dispute or a yelling match with them. Still, usually after a few hours they'd calm themselves and either would find a compromise or they would simply leave the room grumbling and growling. I had witnessed such disputes mostly in the markets when I was with Bofur and Danà and they would usually laugh and explain to me what was happening. At some point I had realized that when two dwarves argued, many others would just watch and comment. It was live reality show without having to pay for it.

As Ori and I had predicted, after one more hour of arguing, Dori finally relented and I smiled widely at Nori to express how grateful I was. That morning I had chosen to wear one of my long tunics with breeches and I giddily followed Dori and Nori to the training ground, Ori trailing behind us with his notebook. When we arrived, I was surprised to see so many dwarves currently focused on their trainings.

Yet no one seemed too surprised or shocked to see me here. We walked directly toward Gloin who was talking with Fili and Kili. Nori and Dori went to meet him directly while I took some time to look around. The room was filled with dwarves and I recognized some of them. At the far end of the room I could easily see the bald, tattooed head of Dwalin who was sparing with a young ginger dwarf I recognized as Gimli, Gloin's son.

I was awoken from my daydreaming by Nori who had just come back towards me. He gestured me to follow him and so I did.

"So, Amelia, ready to train?" Gloin's booming voice asked me from afar.

"Sure." I said with a smile.

I would have to admit it; I was feeling a bit nervous. It had been easy to be cheerful and confident when only Fili and Kili had been there to observe me. It was much more difficult to keep that confidence when the room was full of dwarves. Of warriors who knew perfectly well how to fight. I squared my shoulders and walked toward Gloin while trying to put aside the thoughts of all those warriors looking at me. And to top it all I couldn't forget that Dori and Nori where here too, waiting to haul me back home at the slightest sign of me being hurt or tired. Well, I might be exaggerating here, but still, I didn't want them to think I was weak. At least not too weak to follow Dori.

I swallowed thickly and positioned myself in front of Gloin, a few step away of the warrior. I noticed he had a sort of wooden sword in his hand and I wondered what he would do with that. He was aware I didn't have any weapon, right?

"Well, let's see what those two boys have tried to teach you first." He said and quickly came at me.

My eyes widened as I saw him raise his arm, the one holding the wooden sword, and I quickly jumped away. I hadn't made two steps though that a booming voice resonated in the training grounds.

"Stop!"

Surprised, I stumbled and fell backwards, falling heavily on my backside while Gloin was standing a few steps away, arm still raised above his head.

The ginger dwarf blinked at me then looked around.

"What is it?" He groaned and I turned my head to follow the direction of his gaze.

I saw Dori quickly stride in our direction. He didn't look happy. His arms were crossed on his chest and a deep frown marred his face. Nori was shadowing his big brother but his eyes were on me instead of glaring at Gloin. From the corner of my eye I saw that a fourth silhouette had joined Fili, Kili and Gimli at the side of the ground.

"What is it Dori?" Gloin repeated in a growl.

Somehow I did wonder too. If I were honest, I would say I was slightly glad for the interruption. Gloin was intimidating and seeing him ready to strike me with this wooden sword had my heart racing. But still, I was curious about why Dori had interrupted this.

"Are you mad? How can you go at her like that? With a weapon?" Dori was fuming.

"Oy, you said you wanted me to train her."

"Train her, not kill her you dimwit!" Dori snarled.

"Dimwit? Dimwit!" Gloin shouted. "Who are you calling dimwit you hawker!"

"Hawker?! Who do you think you are …"

I tuned them out. I was flabbergasted as I looked around. Nori was standing a few steps behind his brother, arms crossed on his chest, looking fierce, but his eyes were on me. He looked worried which surprised me. Blinking several times to gather my wits, I quickly jumped back to my feet and looked around. No one seemed ready to try and stop the two loud dwarves who had now started to yell at each other about how I shouldn't be hurt or something like this.

I turned toward the younger dwarves and realized that the silhouette I had seen was Ori. I knew he had followed us, but I didn't know he had actually planned to stay and watch me. Quickly I jogged towards the four of them who were all smirking and snorting quietly.

"What is going on here? Didn't you have to go to work today?" I asked Ori.

"Oh…well, I really didn't want to miss your first training session. I have to admit, it's rather fun to witness it all now that I'm not the one trying to train." He answered with a toothy grin.

"What do you mean?" I was stunned and could still hear Gloin and Dori shouts.

"It's exactly like my first training." His smile broadened on his face before he added cheekily. "Good luck Amelia."

Both my eyebrows rose to my hairline and I turned to observe the two elder dwarves. Surely they would soon stop, right? I really hadn't expected Dori to react like that; after all, he knew what training consisted of. He shouldn't have been surprised by anything Gloin would do. Though I had to admit, the whole wooden sword stunt had been unexpected and maybe too much for me.

It took them half an hour before they finally agreed that Gloin wouldn't use the wooden sword anymore, at least not until I was fully capable of fighting hand to hand. I frowned at hearing that though. I thought that Nori had said I should concentrate on other things than pure combat. Well, I shrugged. These dwarves had to know what they were doing, they were the trained warriors after all.

Gloin then told me we would spar without any weapon, repeating what he had just agreed upon with Dori. I nodded. It would probably be something similar to what I had done with the two brothers this time.

It took maybe five minutes for Dori to yell once more. This time he shouted 'stop it!' when Gloin's fist violently connected with my left shoulder. I wouldn't lie, it had hurt. It still did actually, but I resisted the urge to press my hand on it for fear that Dori would react more angrily.

"What did I just told you? Be careful!" He shouted.

"What do you want me to do? Train her or cuddle her?" Gloin replied in a similar tone.

At those words even Nori's face grew grimmer.

"Are you stupid?" Dori growled before starting to speak in Khuzdul. "Rukhsul menu!" He snarled which made Gloin twitch visibly.

From behind me I heard gasps and snorts. I glanced quickly to see Ori smirking, Kili and Fili grinning and Gimli scowling. What had that meant?

"Metun menu rukhas!" Gloin groaned.

I was completely bewildered and I once more found myself turning towards the younger dwarves. This time Gimli was smiling while Ori was scowling. Both Fili and Kili were still enjoying the show. I strode to them and asked no one in particular.

"What is happening now?"

Honestly I was starting to feel a bit desperate at this point. Or at least very annoyed.

"Dori just told him that Gloin was the son of an orc." Kili said, grinning widely.

"What?" I frowned.

What did that mean? It was ridiculous. Why would he insult Gloin? Beside what kind of stupid insult was that? The son of an orc? It was meaningless.

"And Gloin retorted that Dori was dining with orcs." Fili added, eyes glued on the verbal fight.

Alright, this made even less sense. Were they mad? I turned once more to see that they were still yelling. I sighed deeply and jogged to Nori who was standing slightly to the side. Clearly supporting his brother, but not taking any actual part in the dispute. As I walked to him I saw him send me a questioning glance.

"Why don't you stop them?" I whispered to him rather annoyed at my guardian attitude.

"Why should I? Dori's right, Gloin should be more careful." Nori shrugged and then his gaze fell on my still aching shoulder. "Does it still hurt?"

I rolled my eyes at him and scoffed.

"Seriously, I thought I was here to be trained, not to participate in this…circus show." I groaned at Nori who shrugged once more.

I sighed dejectedly. Apparently no one would side with me this time. Well, I guessed I just had to wait. Patience was a virtue. Now was as good a time as any to acquire it.

* * *

In the end the whole morning was spent with Dori and Gloin yelling at each other. In between those verbal jousts, I got maybe all in all half an hour of training.

To say that I was angry, frustrated and disappointed, when the dwarves decided it was time to go and eat, was an understatement. I was really annoyed at my friends for being so impossible. Truly was it so hard to just sit and watch while I was trying my best not to get beaten into a pulp? Apparently it was.

I couldn't even be really angry at Dori because he had been doing this with my well being in mind. Still, we had to do something about his mother hen issues.

During the whole lunch time I didn't utter a word. I didn't answer when Ori asked me questions, and I didn't react when Dori enquired about my well being. I didn't even bat an eyelash when Nori tried to make me smile by telling me funny stories about Ori's first training week.

I was aware that I was pouting and reacting childishly. But at the moment I felt as if the childish people here were the dwarves.

It probably didn't surprise the three brothers when I quickly disappeared after lunch, escaping them to walk aimlessly in the Halls.

I let my mind wander as my feet moved on their own volition. It shouldn't have surprised me when I ended up facing the wooden door leading to the healing wards. I froze though at the sight and I stayed there, looking at it absentmindedly. I couldn't decide whether I should go in or not. How would Oin react at seeing me? Would he be happy? Would he kick me out? Would he care at all? It wasn't helping either that I didn't want them to think that because I was here, it meant that I was ready to start again as a healer.

It wasn't the case.

Being there brought to the front of my mind all my thoughts about this. My decision had probably surprised quite a lot of people, that much had been obvious, and I was certain that not so many of them understood it. I wasn't sure I understood it myself. There was a part of me that had been completely shell shocked when I had realized I had killed someone. There also was a part of me that had been glad, rejoicing in this man bloody death. That had greatly disturbed me.

The epiphany I had about my complete lack of restraint whenever the three brothers were concerned hadn't helped at all.

Since I had come here, in this world, I had changed. I could admit that much. The change had first been harmless; I laughed more, made friends and didn't mind being teased. These sorts of change were completely welcomed because it had made me feel as if I was becoming a better person. And who doesn't try to become better? Who doesn't like having true friends? Who doesn't like to laugh with people instead of being laughed at?

But then I had schemed to poison ignorant villagers. But then I had stabbed a man repeatedly in the back.

By my standards, these acts didn't make me better. Far from it. It made me feel somehow dirty, undeserving.

And how could I be a healer if I was sometimes overcome with blinding rage, a rage so strong that it would make me kill people?

Too caught in my thoughts, I didn't see Danà come behind me and gently tap my shoulder. I jumped away from her and immediately clenched my fist in the fabric of my tunic, over my rapidly beating heart.

"Hey there." Danà simply said with a soft smile. "It's been a while."

I took a few seconds to calm my heartbeat and I finally answered Danà's smile.

"Hey. I'm sorry I didn't come and see you sooner." I was being honest. I had missed her a lot.

"T'is fine. I heard you had quite a lot on your mind."

With someone else, mostly with any of my acquaintances in my previous world, I would have tried to interpret these words. But with Danà there was no other meaning, no hidden message. I was so glad to see her again. Belatedly I closed the gap between us and embraced her. She gently patted my back and smiled kindly at me when I took a step back.

"So, what are you doing here? I thought you were training with my husband this afternoon."

"If these dwarves expect me to show again in the training ground this afternoon, then they're in for a long wait." I answered evenly.

Meanwhile Danà had pushed the door to the healing wards open and had stridden in. I followed suit, not bothered by my previous thoughts anymore. I was a bit surprised to see that both Dís and Oin were there. Generally Dís wasn't working in the wards unless something specific required her attention.

"Danà, have you found the herbs I needed?" Oin said by way of greeting.

"Aye. You were lucky a merchant caravan managed to come to town a few days ago." Danà answered as I realized only then that she was holding a large basket.

Dís was sitting in a chair not too far from where Oin was working on ointments, from what I could tell, but not close enough to hinder his moves. I stood a bit sheepishly and awkwardly in the way until Dís finally gestured for me to come closer. As I did she ordered me to grab two more chairs and prepare some infusion. I obeyed without blinking, not even thinking about it. It felt natural to obey the princess, though it was maybe slightly odd I didn't perceive it as such.

After maybe ten or fifteen minutes I was sitting with Dís and Danà, drinking tea, while Oin was working close enough to hear us if we talked a bit more loudly than normally.

"So Amelia, why aren't you going back to the training grounds?" Danà asked me while blowing on her tea to cool it down a bit.

"Well, let's just say that this morning's session didn't go quite as well as planned." I answered with a disappointed shrug.

I looked up when I heard Oin put the pestle he was using back on the wooden table. He then turned to face me and put on a severe frown.

"Amelia, if you do not want to resume your apprenticeship in healing for a short while, I can understand. I don't approve, but I understand and sympathise. But you should take your training seriously, especially if you wish to go out of the Halls." He chastised me as I looked at him with wide eyes.

I was flabbergasted to hear Oin giving me such a speech. I really hadn't expected him to completely agree with my thoughts. I didn't have the time to explain what had happened. I would like to train but the male dwarves of my acquaintance were bloody idiots when it came to this particular issue. Dís spoke instead and my eyes could only widen some more in shock.

"Amelia, a healer in this world is not only that. If you go out with, for example, a merchants' caravan you might end up in the middle of a battle. It is not uncommon for the caravans to be raided, by orcs, goblins or even men. A healer has to be trained, not to fight but to survive and stay unharmed. If the healer is hurt or killed, who will help him? Who will heal him?" Dís said sternly.

I was more than surprised to hear those words being uttered by Dís. I hadn't thought she would have been supportive of my choice about training. Clearly I had been mistaken. I opened my mouth to try and explain that I agreed and understood, but Oin spoke before me and I was left listening to him with my mouth half open.

"It is important that you learn enough about fighting so that you can dodge or avoid attacks and defend yourself. You don't need to learn how to attack, just how to defend yourself first. Your health in battle is as important, if not more, than that of a soldier or warrior. As Dís put it, if the healer is killed, then the casualties might end up more important than they could have been had the healer survived."

I didn't wait when he paused, and, before Dís could say anything, I finally spoke my mind.

"Dís, Oin, I know all that. I agree with you all and I've been trying to ask to be taught such things."

"Then why aren't you training right now?" Danà asked, genuinely surprised, before sipping her tea peacefully.

"Because this morning's session was a mess. Gloin first took a swing at me with a wooden sword, which resulted in Dori yelling at him and Nori glaring at him. Then he had barely started to attack me in a hand to hand spar that Dori was shouting once more. At some point I thought the two of them would fight." I replied exasperated, though my friends understood I was annoyed with the men, not them.

There was a short moment during which none of us spoke. I distinctly saw Danà blink several times while Dís sighed and shook her head and Oin grumpily mumbled. Then Danà was the first one to speak again.

"Well, I guess it explains why Gloin was so grumpy when he came back."

"What are they thinking?" Dís groaned. "Don't they realize how important it is that you are trained? They should have started months ago too."

"To be fair, Dori and Nori are just concerned I'll be hurt." I tried to defend the brothers as I did feel rather protective of them.

"Bah." Oin exclaimed. "Dori was exactly like this when it came to train his youngest brother. Poor lad had a tough time attempting to learn anything about fighting."

"I remember an occasion when Ori came to find me. Dori and Gloin were arguing and he wanted me to stop them." Danà shared with us, smiling softly.

It did make me smile even if it was short lived.

"They might think they're protecting you, but they're actually doing the contrary. If anything they should be the ones pushing for you to learn such things." Dís interrupted Danà's recollection of old memories.

"Aye." Oin agreed before looking at me. "What kind of weapon they thought you should use?"

"Hem, we didn't talk about that…Nori did tell me I should try and improve my speed and learn how to dodge and other stuff like this." I answered a bit nervously.

"They should teach you how to use daggers. Dual ones." Dís said before sipping at her tea. "That's what I use. Well, I have short swords, but I think you're not strong enough to use those. Daggers will allow you to use your smaller frame to your advantage."

I half listened, half ignored their banter. Honestly it did interest me in so far that it concerned me. But I knew that it was likely that those talks here wouldn't have any clear effect. Instead of actively participating, I stood up as I had realized we had all finished with our cups of tea and asked them whether they wanted some more. I put some water to heat on the small stove we used here and went back to the small room where plants were stored. I took my time looking through the storage area and finally deciding to add mint with the tea leaves. Meanwhile I still listened to the discussion that took place in the main ward.

"Nah. Daggers will force her to fight in close range. She'll be at more risk." Oin shook his head in disagreement and adjusted his ear trumpet. "She should learn how to use a staff. That'll allow her to use speed, agility and will keep the enemies at a respectable distance."

Dís was about to retort when the door to the healing wards burst opened. I saw it all happen from the shadows of the storage room and was at first too surprised to react.

I saw Ori coming in with intense worry painted on his face and he went straight to Dís, Danà and Oin who immediately tensed after seeing the young dwarf's face.

"What is going on Ori?" Danà just had the time to ask before Ori spoke quickly.

"Amelia disappeared. She was really quiet at lunch and I think she was upset that her training session this morning didn't quite go as she expected. And now, no one knows where she is, no one has seen her. Fili and Kili went back to the unused corridors in case she walked there and got lost again which doesn't make sense because she has a map now."

"Ori…" Dís tried to intervene but the youngest brother kept on talking, eyes wide with worry.

"And then Dori, Nori and Gloin went down to the men's town, but when I asked the merchants near the entrance they said they didn't see her, but she could have still passed. And Gimli went to tell Bofur and Bombur about it all but none of them have seen her …" He was speaking at such a pace that I had trouble to understand everything.

"Ori…" Dís tried again while Danà imitated her and Oin just shook his head and put his ear trumpet away.

"Now Bofur and Bifur are probably looking for her too, I think they went to the mines and they even told Thàlir too who went down to the forges …"

I wanted to step forward, I really did, but a loud bang coming from the entrance door startled me, and the others too, and I temporarily forgot everything. The King strode in, his frown deeper than usual, and groaned.

"Sister! What is it that I heard? Amelia disappeared again? What is wrong with this girl?"

He seemed really angry and I instinctively took a step back.

"For Mahal's sake brother!" Dís snapped loudly. "Nothing's wrong with her!"

"I have an incredible amount of dwarves running around madly trying to find her! I thought she had a map of the Halls now, how can she get lost?!" The King snarled and I saw Oin roll his eyes as Dís put her fist to her hips as she obviously prepared to yell at her brother.

"Hem…excuse me? I'm…not lost." I squeaked shyly from the door leading to the storage room.

All eyes immediately were on me and I gulped.

Now that was going to be a funny discussion…

* * *

**A/N: Hello everyone! You are all amazing :) All those reviews made me so happy you can't imagine! Thanks a lot for the comments and support! Thanks to every reader too as well as the people who added me to their favourites and the new followers :) **

**So yes, it obviously was Nori. But that much wasn't too complicated, right? **

**I know I made the dwarves overreact a bit in this chapter, but somehow I just couldn't picture Dori standing by as Amelia was getting hit repeatedly. As for the Khuzdul, I found those sentences on a website (the link is on my profile) so if there's a mistake...sorry I guess.**

**As for their reaction to Amelia's disappearance, well, for their defense she is often in trouble, right? **

**Anyway I hope you liked it...oh, and please don't kill me for the kiss between Nori and Amelia :) There was just no way I would let those two get together so easily ^^**

**The next update would probably be Tuesday at the earliest. Wednesday latest. :)**

**Happy Easter to all of you who care about that holiday :) Here we're going to eat lots of chocolate brought by...bells (we actually eat rabbits :P)**


	28. Promises and Unexpected Help

**Nothing belongs to me, it's all JRR Tolkien property, except for my OC and the plot.**

* * *

It probably would have made me laugh had I not been in the middle of the whole mess. The dwarves were funny people to live with, when they weren't annoying and noisy. Currently though, the dwarves around were silent for a whole minute before Ori yelped and ran in my direction. He gathered me in his arms and brought me roughly to his chest. I was left with my arms hanging awkwardly at my side for a minute as Ori hugged me rather tightly. His action actually made me realize that despite his smaller and apparently weaker frame, Ori was really quite strong.

He was babbling while hugging me fiercely, telling me how worried he had been and how frantically they had all been looking around.

During his whole speech I kept on blinking and looking at the other dwarves with surprise. The King groaned and brought one of his hands to his face before he passed it angrily through his long dark hair. He looked really annoyed right now. I couldn't help but picture him pulling at his hair in anger but managed to stop a smirk from appearing on my lips. Now wasn't really the time to daydream and portray the others in imaginary situations, especially funny ones involving the King.

I finally broke out of my daze and patted Ori's shoulder reassuringly.

"I'm fine Ori. I'm fine. Honestly I don't understand why you were so worried." I said softly.

I saw Danà, Oin and Dís nod. Obviously the three of them didn't understand this weird reaction either. Danà was clearly entertained by all the events. She was looking from the King to Ori and me with a small, twitching smirk at her lips. Dís seemed to ignore us and observed her brother's reactions while Oin was uncaring of it all.

Ori's shaky voice forced me to focus once more.

"Well, you were clearly upset and then you left and none of us knew where you went…"

"But…erm…"

I had no idea what to say. Still, they thought I tended to overreact? Well at least I knew who had rubbed off on me now. These dwarves seemed to be constantly worried about me and I didn't quite know how to react to that.

In a way I couldn't help but be annoyed that they wouldn't train me properly. It seemed logical to think that if they did train me, then they wouldn't have to worry so much, or at least they should then be able to trust me a bit more to stay safe until someone arrived. But instead of helping me in that way, I had the feeling they would rather put me in a warm and comfy cocoon and then would keep me locked forever inside a fortress. I truly didn't like this thought. It felt as if their good-hearted concern was actually belittling me and my capacities. Did they think me incapable of taking care of myself? Did they believe I couldn't learn anything useful? That was offending in a way.

On the other hand I had to admit it felt oddly good to be always protected, pampered almost, by all these grown men. I didn't mind their care, I actually enjoyed it. I liked how Dori would kindly prepare me chamomile without even asking. I found Ori cute every time he would smother me with endless questions about my well being. I even found Nori's weird over protectiveness rather endearing...sometimes. Knowing that someone would be there for me, would worry for me, would care about what might happen to me, it almost made my head spin.

Though I wasn't being entirely fair; once my uncle and aunt had been there for me in a similar way, but the dwarves just seemed to be … more.

More easily worried, more careful, more understanding…

I felt a pang of sadness in my heart when I actually realized that even though I had loved my blood family as they had loved me, my aunt and uncle just somehow paled in comparison to the dwarves.

It hurt to think that.

I felt I was betraying them.

It wasn't that they hadn't been enough; they had always done everything they could for me. I still loved them and my memories of them fiercely. I still missed them and the quiet happiness we had shared. But it seemed that I was oddly more fitted for a life around here. I felt scared, unsure of myself, often puzzled too, there was no use in denying that in the end this wasn't my world. Sometimes I barely understood what was going on around me. But at the end of the day, even though I went through quite a lot of hardship here too, I was feeling better than I ever had. I felt as if I somehow belonged here. Being here was just right. Being with the dwarves was right.

I was forced to let those thoughts aside when the King groaned once more and Ori stepped away from our embrace. The young dwarf looked a bit embarrassed right then, but the King's voice diverted all attention to him.

"I can't believe I have I don't know how many dwarves running around to find a girl and none of them thought to look for her here."

I had to bit the inside of my cheek not to laugh. The King looked really disappointed and annoyed. I could so easily picture him, banging his head on any hard surface right now. I felt a laugh threatening to come out loudly. If I let myself do that, the King would surely kill me. I managed to clear my throat and forced myself to talk normally.

"What should we do then?"

"Do? There's nothing for you to do my dear." Dís said with a shrug.

"Of course we have to do something." Her brother snapped. "I don't want to end up with a war against the men because those idiots provoked them over something that didn't even happen."

"What have the men to do with this?" I frowned.

Meanwhile Danà slowly brought one hand to her mouth and pressed her fingers tightly against her lips. At this instant I had the undeniable certainty that my dear friend was struggling not to laugh too.

"Absolutely nothing..." The King spoke in an overly sweet voice before finding his natural snappish tone once more. "Except your guardians are under the impression you're always having problems with them. Right now they're probably looking under every rock in the men's town."

"Oh…" That was the only thing I found myself able to pronounce.

What was there to say? Well, I for sure didn't know. My eyes fell on Danà. I shouldn't have glanced at her. Her shoulders were trembling and I could see it was getting hard for her not to laugh heartily. Even Dís seemed amused by it all, despite her brother obvious annoyance of it all or maybe because of it.

It was all rather funny, though the poor King clearly disagreed.

"Ori, go tell the guards at the entrance that she's been found and then go find back your brothers and the others in town. Make sure no one left further and that every one looking for her knows she's safe." The gruff command was clear.

Ori seemed reluctant to leave at first but the King's glare and my reassuring smile did wonders and he quickly left us. Once the door was closed behind him the King sighed and let himself fall on the chair I had previously occupied. He suddenly looked rather tired, which was an interesting if not positive change from his ever annoyed frown.

"Amelia, dear, do you think you could prepare us this tea now? I think my brother needs it." Dís asked me with a kind smile.

When they were next to each other, it was easy to see they were siblings. They had the same long black hair, though Dís' were wavier and had less grey strands than her brother. Another major difference was that Dís' beard was not only thinner and probably softer, but it was longer too, separated in three braids. One larger braid ended with what I guessed to be a silver bead, though it was somehow shiner, and two thin ones curled up and ended with shiny deep red stones. The King had actually a pretty normal beard. Now that I thought about it, it was rather strange to see him with such a short one, especially now that I knew how much they meant for the dwarves. Instead of commenting on this though, I chose to simply nod to Dís and started preparing tea for all of us.

Oin took his ear trumpet back and motioned for me to bring two more chairs, which I did, and once the tea was prepared, I sat with the dwarves. Danà was still smiling happily and it was easy to see in her eyes how amused she was by this mess.

At first we simply drank in silence, until the King looked at me with his piercing blue eyes and gruffly asked me.

"What are you doing here anyway? I thought you didn't want to be a healer anymore."

I sighed a bit and thought about my words before answering.

"It's not that I don't want to be a healer. It's just that for me, killing a man after having poisoned people isn't really…" I frowned. I didn't really know how to put it. "I feel like I don't have the right to call myself a healer after that."

There was a short silence and I saw the King nod thoughtfully before his sister talked.

"We already told you that we don't agree. But we do understand. Take your time to deal with it and meanwhile concentrate on that training of yours." She had motioned towards Oin and the dwarf simply nodded, Danà for her part didn't add anything.

"Training?" The King asked.

"Amelia should know how to defend herself." Oin grumpily answered before more or less repeating the conversation we had earlier to the King.

While he talked I tried to picture myself with a weapon in my hands. I was fairly certain I would not be able to even lift one of the dwarves' massive war axes and I had a terrible aim so even the smaller throwing axes were out of the question. Once when I tried to play darts I actually managed to stick one of the small projectiles in the ceiling…I still didn't understand how I did that. I had been seriously aiming at the target too. My mind went back to the original topic. I didn't know much about medieval weapons. Except for axes, bows and swords, I had no idea what could be used or even useful. I didn't think that a sword would be a good idea for me either. I wasn't really strong and I was short, wouldn't that be at my disadvantage?

But then it would be the same problem with every weapon.

I shook my head. It was pointless for me to think about all this. The dwarves were the warriors, they would know better than me what I should learn or use. I paid attention once more to the others' conversation.

"Well, I'll talk to Gloin but he isn't really the most proficient with staffs and daggers. Oin, could you spare some time to train her?" The King said before eyeing his tea with a frown.

"I can't leave the wards Thorin." The healer replied immediately.

"Bifur could maybe help with the training. He does use his spear masterfully." Danà commented.

"And how will he talk to her?" Dís countered. "I could take care of the wards in the mornings; it will give you some time." She added turning to Oin.

I listened to them. Honestly I had no idea what I could say. I wanted to train and learn how to defend myself at the very least, I didn't really mind if I had to train with one dwarf or another. Still I shifted awkwardly on my seat when Dís spoke. Kili had asked me not to reveal that I knew some words in Iglishmêk because I wasn't supposed to learn it. We had both lied after coming back from Gorm the second time, conveniently forgetting to tell anyone I knew a few words of that secret sign language. I had thought it stupid, but I understood why Kili didn't particularly feel like being yelled at by his uncle. Dwarves were supremely defensive of their secrets and treasures. Apparently that included their languages and, from what I could tell, their women too.

"Fili could help her with twin daggers." Dís then said.

"Fili is used to dual swords, though he's strong with daggers, it isn't his weapon of choice. I was thinking Nori could train her." The King commented, rubbing his chin pensively.

"Nori?" I peeked up at hearing that.

"It's true that Nori is among the bests when it comes to the use of twin daggers." Danà added with a nod.

"More importantly, it'll keep him away of his other…occupation." The King replied.

I suddenly felt indignant after hearing his words. He wanted to use me in order to force Nori to stay within the halls, conveniently obliging him to give up his activities for a while. Had it been any other people involved I might have thought the plan to be rather logical and efficient. But it was Nori and me. And because of that I couldn't help but feel slightly angry at the thought the King wanted to use me against him. Besides I knew that Nori was looking for something important to him, had been looking for it for decades actually, and I couldn't let the King hinder Nori's search.

I quickly tried to find an idea that would both show the King I agreed with him while actually allowing Nori to leave the Halls. I needed to be precise and discreet. It shouldn't be obvious that I was actually taking Nori's side against our King.

"Excuse me but…" I said hesitantly as my brain was still looking for an appropriate plan.

All eyes were suddenly on me. I inhale slowly as an idea started to form in the back of my mind.

"You don't want Nori to help you?" Dís asked sensing I was about to disagree with them.

"It's not that." I replied before licking my lower lip nervously. "It's just that I don't think it would be such a good idea for me to learn so many things at once."

"Nonsense." The King said dismissingly.

"I just mean to say that I'm obviously not used to physical activities." I insisted. "Physiologically it wouldn't be efficient for me to immediately start with a complete schedule." I knew there was no way they would understand the term physiological, but I wanted them to concentrate on my words, not Nori.

"What do you mean?" Dís asked with a deep frown that was mirrored on her brother's face.

"I'm just saying that it would be better for me to first start slowly and gradually intensify my training. From a medical point of view, it would be more logical to work like this. As for the training, I'm sure you don't train your children as if they were seasoned warriors. My abilities are closer to that of a child right now." It was all very logical.

Dís and Oin shared a glance before nodding, the both of them were still frowning slightly though and I couldn't help but wonder what they were actually thinking at the moment. Danà was observing me intently and it unnerved me slightly. Still she remained silent as a soft smile graced her features.

"So how would you train then?"

I glanced at the King. This was a stupid question. He should know what I had meant to say. The odd part was that the King was anything but stupid. It then dawned on me he was probably testing my logic. I didn't ponder on that and chose to answer quickly instead. All this attention was beginning to unsettle me greatly.

"Well, I think I should probably continue first to build up my endurance and strength and probably then start with whatever weapon you think I should know how to use first. As for the actual training, you all know what I should do better than me." I shrugged.

The King stared at me, appraising me, but I knew I was right. Everything I had said was logical. It shouldn't even have surprised them. Actually they should have thought about it themselves. I was a beginner. There was no way I could learn to use weapons and train and basically do everything at the same time. But maybe they didn't truly realize I was truly weak compared to their standards. After all, I had never really talked about my world to the King. I had never really talked to him at all. With Dís and Oin I mostly discussed medicine related topics and with Danà cultural ones. They couldn't know I was such a beginner.

But what mattered most for me right then, was that with this simple logic, I could help Nori.

The King wanted to force him to stay in the Halls. I wouldn't let him do that and once more, simple logic was really helpful.

For the first part I didn't need Nori, so they couldn't force him to stay in the Halls, and then if I insisted to learn one weapon at a time, he would be free to leave once more at some point. I was rather happy with such an arrangement but I could tell from the King's slight frown that it wasn't the case for everyone. I didn't care at the moment though, I wouldn't let them use me to chain Nori to the halls.

"It does make sense." Oin finally agreed.

He didn't comment further and I held my breath. Clearly we were all waiting for the King's decision. Even though I found him incomprehensible at times, I was certain he was following some sort of logic. My little speech should be enough to convince him, even though he clearly had started to plan for Nori to be stuck in the Halls.

"Well then…you'll start tomorrow with Dwalin and Gloin." The King relented rather unhappily.

I let a small sigh of relief escape my lips, but no one paid attention to it as Danà spoke immediately after the dwarf.

"It might be a good idea to forbid the training ground to Dori and Nori while she's trained by Dwalin and Gloin." Danà added before sipping her tea calmly.

"Why?" The King frowned once more.

Seriously sometimes I wondered whether he knew how to smile, then I remembered his life story and conceded that he might have the right to be grumpy.

Danà didn't answer and simply arched one eyebrow, looking pointedly at the King before glancing towards me. His icy blue eyes looked at me questioningly. I shrugged, there wasn't much to say about that but I couldn't help but think that Danà's idea wasn't that bad. The dwarf sighed. He didn't need an explanation after all, not after the whole debacle that involved me and the dwarves that very afternoon.

"Right." The King said. "Then tomorrow you start your training and when Dwalin and Gloin agree and think you can move on, we'll see if Bifur and Oin can both help you train with a staff."

After those words the King swiftly stood, placed his small tea cup on the table and nodded at us before striding out of the wards.

The four of us remained silent for awhile. Dís observed me carefully. Then Danà said with a sly smirk.

"Nori will be happy to learn that he can still go out of the halls."

"These brothers are definitely lucky to have you on their side…" Dís agreed with a smirk of her own.

Oin huffed and went back to his ointment while I blushed a bit as the two women kept on observing me.

I clearly wasn't as discreet as I thought.

* * *

Later that afternoon, I was scribbling in my notebook, sitting by the fire in the living room, when the door finally opened to let the three brothers enter, closely followed by Bofur, Bifur and Bombur.

I glanced at them and couldn't help but smile slightly. From what I had understood they had spent quite a while running around, looking for me when I was simply having tea in the healing wards. All their gazes immediately riveted on me and I could see some tension visibly leave their shoulders. These dwarves were really worrying too much.

"Hey." I said simply.

"Amelia, are you alright?" Dori immediately asked, coming next to me as if to check I wasn't hurt.

"Of course." I scoffed. "I was in the healing wards as I'm sure Ori told you."

"Are you back to being a healer then lass?" Bofur asked while taking a seat.

The others imitated him and soon we were all comfortably sitting, though Ori and Nori were on simple wooden chairs not armchairs like the others.

"I'm not. I just walked there and met with Dís, Danà and Oin." I answered simply.

"Why didn't you tell us?" Ori's voice was as soft as ever and he looked at me with big surprised eyes.

"Because I was still annoyed with you when I left…" My tone was perfectly calm, as I wrote the end of my sentence quickly, not looking at either of them.

"Why?"

That word made me look up. I hadn't paid attention to who had spoken this word, but the question was reflected in all their gazes.

"Don't you realize that the both of you just spoiled completely my training this morning?" I pointed at Nori and Dori who looked slightly sheepish. "The King said that for my next training sessions you won't be allowed on the grounds at all."

"What?! That's preposterous! I will not let you be injured by this…"

"Dori!" I cut in. "I'm going to train with Gloin and Dwalin. I'm probably going to be hurt and I don't want to hear that you went to yell at them about it. I've had enough of stupid arguments this morning. Do you want me to actually be killed next time I leave the Halls? Because I will leave the Halls again and without being trained I will remain weak. And I might not be lucky the next time. So it's your choice, either you let me train properly or you'll cry over my body once I'm dead."

The words were harsh, the tone slightly snappish though I remained calm, but the words were true and honest. I wasn't stupid. I knew I had been extremely lucky both times I went to Gorm and I had been lucky during my first weeks here when the dwarves had managed to save me from the men who took me. I knew I was weak, I knew I was desperately and pathetically unprepared to life here. If I wanted to be able to survive in this world and more importantly live, I would have no other choice but to strengthen up. I knew I had grown a bit mentally but that was far from enough.

Now I needed to strengthen my body and that meant training. That meant knowing how to fight or at least to defend myself. Otherwise I wouldn't possibly be able to survive long. Even with the dwarves to protect me, even with what little wit and luck I had, I wouldn't survive in this violent and harsh world.

Dori and Nori would just have to accept it.

They couldn't always be there to help me, to protect me.

My wit will not protect me from a blade or an arrow.

My luck was as strong as my unnatural ability to get into trouble.

They had to understand that.

The dwarves avoided my gaze and exchanged glances. Most of them looked sheepish, even Bofur though Bombur and Bifur nodded at my words, apparently agreeing with me.

"We're just worried." Dori sighed looking rather put out by my little outburst.

"I know Dori. And honestly I'm glad to know you care that much for me. Really. But it's not helping me in this instance. I'd rather be hurt by Dwalin and Gloin during training than by men outside." I replied softly.

I saw them nod at my words, even though Nori was frowning and clearly unhappy. But at least he understood and accepted my point of view.

Little by little we eased in less controversial conversations and soon Bombur, Dori and I ended up in the kitchen, preparing dinner. The others were already smoking happily. It was odd that their habit didn't disturb me. I had fervently been against cigarettes before. But what they smoked wasn't tampered with addictive products. It was just plants and the smell of the smoke wasn't nearly as bad as that of cigarettes. Actually it even smelt rather nice.

"Should we try another one of your recipe Amelia?" Bombur asked with a soft smile, forcing me to focus on the present time.

I chuckled a bit and Dori smiled too before I answered.

"I'm not sure Bombur. They spent quite some time running around to find me. I think these dwarves deserve a nice dinner."

"Aye, we did run quite a bit." Dori agreed.

I smiled at him while he brought a huge round cheese and let it loudly fall on the table.

"You know." I said. "There's actually a recipe we could try and I swear it doesn't include fruits and vegetables."

At that the two dwarves looked at me as I quickly explained what ingredients were needed and to my surprise Dori was as intrigued as Bombur.

"It does sound like an interesting idea." Bombur nodded with his usual little smile.

"Well, it doesn't require much work either, but I don't recommend you try and prepare it for the main dining hall. I really don't think it'd be such a good idea. Besides, I think the King wouldn't be pleased if I were to cause trouble again."

Bombur grinned as he started to prepare the food for our dinner, firstly putting some meat in the oven and then starting to prepare my recipe.

"Don't worry about Thorin." Dori said while cutting the cheese in pieces. "He's a good and fair leader. He knows you're not trying to cause trouble, I think he's actually starting to respect you."

"Does he?" I asked though to be honest I wasn't sure what to make of the answer either way. "I mean, he doesn't really show any…appreciation. Actually I can't read him at all, he's always acting weird for me."

Bombur smiled at that and Dori even snorted. His amusement didn't last long though and he quickly became serious again.

"Thorin is...well he's been starting to think about a lot of things recently." Dori replied frowning slightly.

"You mean with the message he received?" Bombur asked.

"Aye. I'm not sure who send it but since he received that message he's been rather…restless. Or at least grumpier than usual, he's actually been thinking about leaving the Halls alone to go meet the one who sent it, or so Balin told me."

"That probably didn't please Balin." Bombur commented as he was checking over the meat and then went back to the cauldron we used for preparing my recipe.

"Not pleasing Balin?" Dori snorted. "He's been trying to convince Thorin to at least bring Dwalin with him, but he's more stubborn than a dozen dwarves together."

I was listening intently to this conversation even though I could only understand it a bit. It felt strangely peaceful to be there, cutting pieces of bread while listening to Dori and Bombur talk. And I couldn't help but be somehow happy that they would talk about what seemed like important things in front of me. I felt as if they were considering it normal for me to be there while they discussed details of Thorin's Halls politics. I couldn't lie to myself; I was pleased because I took it for a sign of trust. It wasn't as if they had forgotten I was sitting with them, they just trusted me enough.

"How far away is the meeting point?" I asked then.

"I'm not too sure, but I can't believe Thorin would agree to go too far of the Halls." Dori shrugged.

"I wouldn't be so sure." Bombur softly disagreed.

I could easily see that they were both worried for their leader and I couldn't help but be impressed by their loyalty towards him. It was strangely clear in my mind then that these dwarves would probably follow the King anywhere if he asked them. But apparently the King wasn't one to ask for help and preferred to do things by himself. I realized with surprise that it would sadden me if something were to happen to him. Well not really sadden, I couldn't put a name to it, but something told me it wouldn't be a happy feeling.

"And when would our leader supposedly leave for this meeting?" I asked once I had finished my task with the bread.

"In a few months I think but I'm truly not sure, could as well be next year for all I know. If anyone knows it'd be Balin, but even him didn't appear certain of anything." Dori answered while putting the large cauldron over the stove as Bombur took a long wooden spoon.

Dori then came to seat beside me on the bench and I could feel he wanted to say something but felt reluctant to do so. I lightly bumped his shoulder with mine and smiled softly when he glanced towards me. His smile was a bit unsure but I waited patiently for him to talk. When he finally did, his voice was low and I immediately understood that, even though Bombur would hear, he didn't really want to express these thoughts to everyone.

"Amelia, I'm sorry about earlier." He said, shocking me at the same time. "It is not that I don't believe you capable of learning. Actually it is quite the contrary. But you have to understand, our world…there's no amount of training that could really protect you. I lost my father when he was outside our halls. He was a skilled warrior, he trained a lot. He was strong but that didn't protect him in the end."

I held my breath as I listened to him. Now I understood perfectly why he didn't want to talk too loudly, Dori was probably trying to protect his brothers; the topic was painful for the three of them obviously and he didn't want to remind the two younger dwarves of their father's death.

"After his death our mother..." He paused, visibly looking for his words. "Ori was eleven at the time. Our Ma she…she changed after our Da's death. She didn't smile anymore, only managed to do so with Ori punctually. She spent several years as a recluse until one day, after Ori's twentieth birthday, she started to go out with the caravans too. She left just like that, leaving Ori to me and Nori."

I glanced at Bombur but the dwarf remained silent. Any trace of a smile had disappeared from his features though. I tried to imagine what it must have been like, to see your mother go away while having to take care of your younger brother. Dori was still speaking though and I quickly turned my attention back to him.

"She knew how to fight. She had lived in Erebor and had survived the years of exile after all. She was strong too."

I was completely silent as Dori spoke in a forlorn voice, his face expressed how hurt he still was, how painful it was for him to speak about this. He closed his eyes and my heart clenched. Silence was oddly suffocating for a minute until Dori managed to start once more.

"She was strong. You should have seen her…she was just like Dís, stubborn and confident."

Dori's voice faltered again as he stared at the wall in front of him. He had this particular look on his face that made me realize that he was probably lost in his memories, seeing his mother again in front of his eyes. My heart clenched painfully. I knew how it felt to lose someone. I knew it. I could feel his pain and understood it all too well.

"Even though she was strong, even though she was travelling with others, she came back hurt. Her injury wasn't too bad in itself, just a deep gash on her forearm's length." He gestured to his arm to illustrate his words. "But it got infected."

I couldn't help but close my eyes, trying to swallow back the lump in my throat. I wasn't sure I wanted to hear the rest of the story but on the other hand I didn't want to stop Dori. There was a point in him telling me this and I was starting to guess what it was. I listened to him, my heart breaking at his words and as I heard the pain so clear in his voice. I knew already what he was going to say but it didn't help at all.

"Oin and Dís… they tried their best. They really did. But even though they somehow managed to heal that first infection, it left our Ma incredibly weak. She couldn't even leave her bed anymore after that and seemed always sick. It was terrible to witness her slowly decline to the point when we had to feed her because she couldn't eat by herself anymore."

Dori took a deep, shaky breath and rubbed his forehead tiredly. He didn't try to hide the guilt that he apparently felt.

"I wasn't there much back then. I had to go with the caravans much more often."

He looked at his hands that were now resting on the table. A deep frown marred his face and I couldn't tear my eyes away.

"Ori was here all the time. He took care of her. He saw her waste away. He witnessed it all."

I bit my lip strongly. Even I couldn't even start to fathom how the poor dwarf must have felt. Ignoring everything else, Dori kept talking.

"It was around then that Nori started to leave the halls, though I learned about his activities much later. Ori was only thirty four when she died. It is young for a dwarf…"

I couldn't resist anymore. Tears in my eyes I grabbed Dori's hand and squeezed it. I think I understood his point but I managed to swallow my tears and waited for him to finish.

"This is partly why I'm not fine with you going out of the Halls. I can't help but think about what could happen. If you were to disappear like our Da did, Amelia I think that I would roam Middle Earth until I find your body or died myself. I know I wouldn't be alone in this quest." His voice was strong as he spoke those words.

I could feel his utter certainty as he pronounced them. It almost sounded like a vow and it scared me slightly. I knew I was important to them. It was easy to see. But this was different. It made me feel responsible somehow. I felt like I owed them to be safe.

Dori's voice was strangled when he spoke next.

"And if you were to end up like our Ma…Amelia I know Ori would be devastated to see you like that. And I… I couldn't forgive myself if such a thing happened to you. You're not only a ward anymore. You're part of our family. I think of you as my baby sister now."

I couldn't stop the tears anymore. Slowly I lifted Dori's arm and slid closer to him before letting his arm fall around my shoulders. I then hugged him fiercely.

"I understand Dori. I feel like that too." I said with a strangled voice. "I do. But…"

I stopped. How could I tell him just after he opened like this to me that, whatever his words, I would still attempt to train and I still planned to go out? How could I be so cruel? Could I spend a life behind the protection of the mountain walls? Could I do it and not resent them later on? Sadly I knew I couldn't. I would end up hurting them either way.

"I know Amelia." Dori softly replied. "I know and I understand too. I just wanted to let you know why we reacted like this."

I nodded and I felt him hug me back. I was so moved both by his speech and the fact that he had called me his baby sister. It was such a strange mixture of feeling.

Dori cleared his throat a bit before patting my back and speaking.

"Tomorrow, I'll accompany you to the training grounds, and then I'll leave immediately. You better give it your all because I'm not going to let you follow me if you're not able to at least run away of a fight."

I let the tears fall freely on my cheeks as I embraced Dori. He was always worrying about me and would probably always be; if his behaviour towards Ori was anything to go by. But in the end I wouldn't change him because, even though he couldn't help but worry, he still fought his own instincts. And I knew he was only doing it for my sake only.

"Thanks." I managed to utter.

Bombur had been silent during the whole time, staying next to the cauldron and seemingly concentrating on the mixture that was starting to bubble in it. I was starting to know him better now. The ginger chef was a calm character but really thoughtful and kind. I could have bet that he knew what Dori was probably going to say. The fact that Dori managed to speak in front of Bombur just showed how much he trusted him. Bombur was a true caring friend in his own, silent and discreet way. He had provided us with his peaceful but silent presence and I was glad he was there.

He only turned to face us once I stopped sniffling. Dori had kept an arm around my shoulder and I didn't hesitate to lean against him. Bombur smiled at the both of us and then happily said dinner was ready. Quickly Dori and I helped put everything missing on the table and around fifteen minutes later we called for the other to join us.

Once everyone was sitting around the table, they all eyed the cauldron with caution.

"What's in that?" Bofur asked.

"Is it one of Amelia's recipes?" Ori added and I saw all those who hadn't help in the kitchen stiffen on their seats.

Well of them except for Bifur who just seemed to take a deep breath before addressing me an approving grunt and nod. Nori was looking at me suspiciously yet he schooled his features. Bofur and Ori though didn't even try to hide their fears. I sighed exasperatedly.

"Yes, it's one of my recipes. It's called 'fondue' and it's basically melted cheese and alcohol. Though this is not the right cheese and you usually use white wine and not…whatever it was that Bombur put in it."

The tension seemed to leave them a bit and I resisted the urge to roll my eyes, were my other recipes so terrible that they were scared of them now?

Still they all looked curiously at the cauldron now. Ori even was brave enough to take his fork and poked the hot mixture that was in it. I smiled at the sight.

"And how do we eat it?" Ori asked perplexed. "It's all…melted."

"It's supposed to be melted." I replied before explaining. "You take a piece of bread on your fork or knife and you dip it in the melted cheese. Then you just have to eat the bread coated with it." I showed them as I explained and, though the taste was completely different from that of my memories, it still tasted nice.

The dwarves observed me as I ate the piece of bread before they all started to imitate me. As they all plunged the bread in the cauldron I spoke once more.

"I bet one of you will lose his bread in the cauldron."

They all eyed me suspiciously and I chuckled lightly when Bofur grumpily realized he had nothing to eat.

This started a rather strange gambling game and after fifteen minutes I realized that eating fondue with dwarves probably wasn't such a good idea. Threads of cheese coated the table and when they started to throw bread at Bombur my eyes widened in horror. There was cheese everywhere. But the sight of the dwarves with their usually nicely trimmed and braided beard that now sported strings of cheese was enough to make me smile again. It was like eating with a bunch of five years old and it would be a nightmare to clean it all but well, at least we had fun.

* * *

The following morning Dori woke me rather early. He had prepared a huge breakfast with assortments of meats and cheeses with fresh bread and honey and even some fruits. When I looked at him questioningly he simply smiled and told me that I needed to eat properly if I wanted to have enough energy for my first real training.

Suddenly I seemed to realize that everything I had done so far was probably rather light and the training I was about to start would be much more intense. As I was about to fill my plate, Dori stopped me.

"I put all of this on the table so that you have choice. Don't eat too much."

"But I'll starve if I don't eat enough."I replied.

"The more you eat, the more chances there are that you'll be sick." Nori's voice forced me to glance behind my shoulder.

I saw he was wearing his travelling coat and it only took a glimpse at Dori's frowning face to confirm my suspicion. Nori was leaving the Halls today. He was going to look for those items he was searching. Dori glared at his brother before ignoring him completely and leaving for his room.

After a few minutes of rather awkward silence I cleared my throat.

"You're leaving today?" It seemed so pointless to ask.

"Aye."

He didn't look at me. Maybe I imagined things, but he seemed rather hesitant, his expression was guarded. I observed him for several minutes while he put a loaf of bread, some cheese and dried meat in his leather bag. I put my hand on his forearm, forcing him to halt his movements.

"Remember your promise? You'll let me check you for injuries when you come back?"

His eyes finally looked at me and I saw his hard gaze soften. A small smile pulled the corner of his lips upwards, not a smirk, a true little smile that made my heart skip a beat.

"Aye."

I nodded. There wasn't much to say truly. I couldn't, and wouldn't, stop him. He needed this and I had no right to try and force him to stay here, especially when I was complaining about them trying to force me to stay. Still, it didn't stop me from worrying even though Nori hadn't left yet. Suddenly the urge to help him in any way I could overtook me. There wasn't much I could do but I still could try.

"What plants do you have with you?" I asked him suddenly.

"What?" He turned to me with a questioning frown.

"Plants, dried ones. If you are hurt, what are you going to use?"

"Amelia, I don't plan on being…" He tried to say before I interrupted him.

"Yeah, because when you're hurt usually you planned it before?" I was clearly being sarcastic but my tone softened when I continued. "Just, give me a minute. I'll prepare a small satchel with different plants you can use."

I darted to my room, finding my abandoned bag near my trunk and rummaged through it to find my satchel. I would have to resupply it anyway but I could give Nori several pouches. I took them and strode to the kitchen where Nori was thankfully waiting for me.

"Here." I said handing him the first pouch. "This is thyme as I'm sure you know. If you're hurt, use it to clean your wound. Remember to use only boiled water."

I saw him smile once more and I swallowed thickly. At least he was being attentive to my words.

"Aye. I'll remember."

His grave voice was barely audible as he whispered his answer.

"And here you have Echinacea. Just put a spoon in a cup of boiled water, when it's cool enough drink it. It will strengthen your body against infections."

He nodded as I gave him the third and last pouch.

"And this is a preparation for an ointment. You just have to add water to make a paste. You put it on your wound after it's been cleaned. It should reduce pain and swelling, it's mostly Witch Hazel."

"Thanks Mizimul." He whispered and I saw how grateful he was in the unusual shine in his eyes.

It was at that moment only that I understood how meaningful this gesture probably was for him. Everyone was either berating him or trying to stop him, simply because he was a thief. I was fairly certain I was the first one to actively try to help him instead. I didn't like the fact that he was a thief, but I knew it was something important for him. I could relate to that. In such a case I could only try my best to support him and make sure he would come back relatively unharmed.

As he turned and put the three pouches in his bag I just observed him. In just a minute he seemed ready to leave. He remained motionless for a second, glancing at me, clearly unsure of what to do next. For the first time we faced each other awkwardly though I couldn't fathom why it would feel like that. He seemed to hesitate and probably was about to do something when I spoke, stopping whatever he was going to do.

"Just…be careful. And come back soon. Alright?" I almost whispered.

My eyes were locked to his grey ones and I was unable to look away. He stared at me for a little while, his gaze was rather intense and suddenly I couldn't stand it anymore. My eyes avoided his and I heard him clear his throat.

"I will. I promise."

I nodded, feeling already sad at his departure though he was still facing me.

"Good luck with your training." He murmured before adding. "And be careful too."

"I promise." I answered while looking at my hands.

And this time I'll really do everything in my power to keep my promise to him.

* * *

I immediately felt the loss. I was counting the days since he'd left and I suddenly understood Ori's forlorn mood much more. I was actually mirroring them. Dori was for his part clearly angry, but now that I knew better what had happened to their parents, I understood his temper too.

It was obvious that his anger was solely directed at Nori, and it was the fact that Nori would endanger himself seemingly carelessly that fuelled Dori's mood. Nori was not only going out, which was already dangerous, but he was a thief and even I could guess some of the problems that were related to his activities. What would happen if he were caught? From what I had understood so far, the judicial system around was almost…nonexistent.

Nori could be hanged, killed on the spot, imprisoned and what else? Even just thinking about those made my skin crawl so I didn't really need to try and find other potential punishments for thievery. What if they cut limbs like it happened in movies?

Instead of wallowing in worry I decided to truly invest everything in my training.

Nightmares plagued me and often starred Nori in various bloodied states. So I worked harder to the point I was so exhausted each evening that I barely had the energy to eat much less then to dream. I spent all my time in the training grounds, and if I wasn't seen there I would either be replenishing my stock of medicinal plants at the markets or healing wards, or I was at home cooking or sleeping.

My muscles ached, protesting against the harsh treatment they received. My lungs burnt, my legs burnt, my arms burnt, my head was light more often than I could count.

It was hard.

It was painful.

And I was still doing basic training.

At that moment only did I truly comprehend how unfit I was. But it was worth it. So I ran the laps as I was asked to, I didn't complain and ran until I would fall to the ground in exhaustion. The mornings especially were tiring. I would run for who knows how long. I had no reprieve but for a short break before I would learn how to dodge and avoid blades and blows. I was sparring with various dwarves, but it usually was Dwalin and Gloin who trained me. Sometimes I would spar with Gimli who, I discovered then, had a great sense of humour. He had the mouth of a sailor as well and clearly despised elves almost as much as orcs.

It was fun.

The sparring lessons were brutal and painful in a whole new way. Usually I would be forced to fight barehanded while a dwarf was attacking me with wooden knives or swords. From the start of the spar to the last second of it, it was jumping sideways, jumping above the blade, jumping back, crouching before bouncing back, blocking with my hands without touching the wood, paring with my forearms…

My arms and legs were black and blue and I spent much time in the healing wards just in order to resupply my rapidly disappearing stock of plants. Oin was kind enough not to comment whenever I would stumble or limp into the wards. He was getting used to seeing me rummaging through the plants and grumbling because I couldn't find any aspirin…he didn't even ask me to explain what I meant by that.

During the afternoons I wasn't sparing much though, because the grounds were used by skilful warriors, and I would simply observe them as they trained. Meanwhile Dwalin or Gloin would explain me why some movements were better than others. It was both interesting and frightening. Frightening because I couldn't fathom how someone would be able to think about all of that while fighting for real. When I voiced my fears Dwalin grunted and crossed his arms.

"That's why we train so much, lass. The more we train and repeat the right moves, the more they become instinctual."

I nodded pensively, it made sense actually.

There hadn't been any discussion yet as to when I would be given a weapon. Dwalin and Gloin agreed that I wouldn't learn how to defend myself with one until I was able to survive a barehanded spar. At the moment each spar ended with me either lethally wounded or simply dead. It was rather disheartening.

Thankfully Ori, Fili, Kili and soon Gimli too were highly supportive. They would offer me advises and would encourage me loudly. Not once did they laugh at me when I fell. Not once did they jump to stop the spar when I was being hurt.

It spoke volumes to me.

They understood and agreed with my will to learn.

* * *

A month and a half after Nori's departure I was not worried anymore. I was terrified. Listening to the warriors relating their encounters with orcs and goblins finally made me understand that those nightmarish creatures were real and incredibly dangerous.

Those discussions awoke me to the dangers one could encounter outside. Then there were the usual issues of leaving outside without shelter, of wild animals, and stupid men. I knew before of course, but now I heard daily stories and anecdotes of what had happened to these warriors. Why one of them had lost his right ear, how that one had ended with such a terrible scar across his face, how many comrades and friends they had grieved for…

At some point even my intensive training and my exhaustion weren't enough to ban the nightmares anymore.

Sleep eluded me more and more.

And Nori wasn't there…

* * *

**A/N: I know I repeat myself a lot, but really thanks everyone. Your support is amazing and it gives me the will to always write more :)**

**So thanks everyone! **

**So... I know, I know...Nori left. But please don't hate me :) At least Amelia is getting trained properly, right? And you got a bit more of Danà too! Alright, I swear Nori won't disappear for long...maybe ;)**

**In this chapter I really wanted to get a little bit more of Amelia/Dori time. I hope it didn't sound too... I don't know, over dramatic or anything. I mostly wanted to show why the three can be so over reacting, and I wanted to insist on the harsh part of their life. **

**Anyway, I hope you liked it :)**

**I don't know when the next update will be. I'll try to update during the weekend. I hope you'll keep enjoying this story :) **


End file.
